it's done. it's over, forever. (Page 3)

LOL, that's a good sign scorpio24. He noticed you didn't nag him and thus texted you back later ....

Posted by scorpio24
i think im slowly getting stronger...

i sent him a message this morning saying have a nice day 🙂 and he hasnt written back... lol usually im really sad about it but im not bothered that much.. i guess the last few days might have toughened me up??

i know ive said this before.. but i am actually just not going to contact him for the next 3/4 days. hopefully he will contact me by then, do u think he will by everything you guys have read ^^^^

i ate normally today too thank goodness.

That is typical scorp heartbreak... the crying for days and days, despair, indescribable shit... but when the crying is over, we not quite as soft and vulnerable to that person anymore. And heartbreak doesn't have to be from an actual breakup. My ex-virgo hubby broke my heart many times, for years before we divorced. Little by little I grew to loving him less and less, til I had no feelings for him except annoyance. There were no tears from the divorce. Just bitterness and ice. And he still tries to contact me to this day (now which is 8yrs later)-- he wanted to reconcile a couple of times, wanted sex on more than a few occasions, even when he had a girlfriend (the same woman he was having an affair with). I ignore him. But it pisses me off when he has the nerve to do that

Posted by virgoking
Sounds like he keeps you around scorpio24 because he wants convenient sex and he may like you as a person but does not want to be in a relationship with you. Thats why he wants you to end it so he won't feel like a bad guy.

+100
I have to be blunt here, your welcome to hate me... I know how a virgo mind operates and in the situation of scorpio24, Move ON girl, that will hurt you, yes but it will make you stronger. What a Virgo want is someone who is strong, intelligent, self-driven, not clingy, not overly emotional, emotionally mature of course! Wake up scorpio24! Honestly speaking I don't want to be the person responsible for ending the relationship, I would wait for my partner to end the relationship cause I can't bear the blame for ruining/ending the relationship.. If I became cold in a relationship, it's either I'm considering to end the relationship or I am analyzing the qualities of my partner. Re-evaluation and analyzing things again. A self-assured person is what we want in our life so if you're not that, don't act or pretend that you're that cause it won't last long and you'll be back to your own self again and we will not like that. A Virgo always knows his/her value so we don't stoop down. We want someone who's independent and knows their value too... how you take things scorpio24, honestly speaking its annoying. I can envision how your relationship will end. I'm trying so hard not to hurt you and I won't be sorry for that... Just move on and you'll see how things will change... have faith in yourself!

to be fair, scorpio24 is a very beautiful girl... so there's a lot of reason why she has to move on... it won't be difficult for her to find another one... she just have to look within herself... that she is more than just the ex of this virgo guy... 🙂

i saw from somewhere that majority of the guys value physical attraction... but you're right, one has to find her inner beauty...

i don't watch jersey shore. lol.

well,i guess, miss scorpio24 is quite moving on... (based on her latest posts)... but she might get stuck if she continues to text the guy... i really think that if they're not going to stay as friends and are not comfortable being one, the best thing to do is to throw his number away and lose all contacts with him... I'M VERY SURE THAT THE FEELINGS WILL GO SOONER OR LATER... it will just be A MATTER OF TIME...

I don't mean to be ride cause I know you're all just trying to help.. But I have already heard from EVERYONE how much I just need to break up with him and move on and that he doesn't want me etc etc. I know this to a certain extent I don't need to be reminded, I know it can be frustrating cause from everyone's eyes I have obviously been upset etc but it's also frustrating cause at the end of the day what I write on here and how you all read it can be misunderstood cause at the end of the day NO one really knows what it's like unless you're me in the position and you knew my virgo. I wish people would actually just answer my actual questions instead of drifting off about how I should end it..

***rude

when he starts initiating more contact what should i do virgos? i dont want to play mind games.. but i dont want to be straight at his feet because HE decided he wanted to contact me after stringing me along... :/ lol

Find that answer inside you, Scorpio24.

Posted by scorpio24
when he starts initiating more contact what should i do virgos? i dont want to play mind games.. but i dont want to be straight at his feet because HE decided he wanted to contact me after stringing me along... :/ lol

If he starts contacting you just play COOL. That's it. Play real cool. This should be your absolutely ONLY response. It lets him see YOU are in control of your feelings. It lets him see that his not a god...He's just an average man.

Really read this:
If he contacts you through text, always always always mirror him. If he sends 1 word texts, you send 1 word texts. If he's talking about his day or random topics, you do the same. From this point on, Your texts or emails should always be LESS wording than his. Shorten & condense EVERYTHING you have to say to a minimum. You don't want to express any feelings or nice compliments what so ever. Plus start missing his phone calls on purpose. Just let it ring until YOU feel like talking. He basically has to make appointments to talk to you now. You're too busy now. Even if your just watching tv. You are too busy lol. Talk when you feel like it. Talk on your schedule now.

??My point is the less you give, the more he gives!
??The less conversation you give, the more he wants!

If you Let him see he's not that special. Then he will start trying to prove that he is! He won't be able to understand what happened to you ? What's the change in you ? Why doesn't she want me? Has she met another guy — Shouldn't she be crying over me? I know you can handle this 🙂

One thing to help make you feel good about yourself....

Let him see you dress up, put on lip gloss & some heels & go out WITHOUT him! Go anywhere ! A grocery store if you want...just let him see you doing something without him, independently. Don't tell him where, Let him wonder what you're up to... Where you've been going these days looking so delicious & hot. Scorpios are mysterious right? Be mysterious for a while lol. Getting dolled up always makes me feel good. At the same time, this should also create some uneasiness in him...Maybe even tick him off a little to see you 'look' happy

But overall do it for yourself. You deserve some time to yourself. Eat good & be healthy. No man on this earth is worth losing weight over....No man is worth getting a pimple either! Your beauty is a gift. So be a little vain & work it girl 🙂

"If he contacts you through text, always always always mirror him. If he sends 1 word texts, you send 1 word texts. If he's talking about his day or random topics, you do the same. From this point on, Your texts or emails should always be LESS wording than his. Shorten & condense EVERYTHING you have to say to a minimum. You don't want to express any feelings or nice compliments what so ever. Plus start missing his phone calls on purpose. Just let it ring until YOU feel like talking. He basically has to make appointments to talk to you now. You're too busy now. Even if your just watching tv. You are too busy lol. Talk when you feel like it. Talk on your schedule now."

this is what i usually do! and have done in the past with him, and it defiently works.. im gonna try this again, haha i know it might seam like i have let this make me feel insecure and stuff, but it honestly hasnt. in general i am quite happy with myself and who/how i am. not in a boastful way either.

in a way i am actually happy that this is happening, cause i am finding myself more strong and i didnt even cry once yesterday or today so far.. i have had moments where i felt like it but it went away quickly.

i think im going to go back to being mysterious and unpredictble and mirror his actions. there is no point in rewarding him by his rude/indecisive behaviour... i never wrote back to his message "night x " cause he didnt reply to me all day, so meh. mirroring him.

🙂

I'm glad you are happy Scorpio24!! That makes me feel so good. I just didn't know if you was feeling absolutely horrible & depressed. But I see you are much stronger now!

Just continue to remind yourself everyday that you're a Queen. Walk like one, look like one, talk like one! A Queen is regal, majestic & untouchable. The world adores her beauty & little girls want to BE her. She never lowers herself to chase any man. Men chase her !

I trust that you will make wise choices with this guy. You are a smart girl 🙂

Posted by Rapunzel
I'm glad you are happy Scorpio24!! That makes me feel so good. I just didn't know if you was feeling absolutely horrible & depressed. But I see you are much stronger now!

Just continue to remind yourself everyday that you're a Queen. Walk like one, look like one, talk like one! A Queen is regal, majestic & untouchable. The world adores her beauty & little girls want to BE her. She never lowers herself to chase any man. Men chase her !

I trust that you will make wise choices with this guy. You are a smart girl 🙂

im not HAPPY, but im not as upset.. im getting stronger slowly, im content most of the time.. but thankyou 🙂 you are sweet

I spoke too soon, currently having a wave of emotion.. Not crying still pretty stable but feel sad 😢 I didn't write back to his message lastnight I wonder when/if he will write me another... Owpp

Posted by scorpio24

Posted by Rapunzel
I'm glad you are happy Scorpio24!! That makes me feel so good. I just didn't know if you was feeling absolutely horrible & depressed. But I see you are much stronger now!

Just continue to remind yourself everyday that you're a Queen. Walk like one, look like one, talk like one! A Queen is regal, majestic & untouchable. The world adores her beauty & little girls want to BE her. She never lowers herself to chase any man. Men chase her !

I trust that you will make wise choices with this guy. You are a smart girl 🙂

im not HAPPY, but im not as upset.. im getting stronger slowly, im content most of the time.. but thankyou 🙂 you are sweet

click to expand

Your welcome. Its always easy to tell someone to end a relationship. But i understand that realistically deep feelings don't just get up and walk away!

So this is why my ONLY focus is on making sure you become strong as possible with your inner self. Because when you are strong, the decisions YOU make in the future will be strong & wise too.

thanks, i'll try.. i almost feel like i come on dx to reasure myself and keep me kind of sane. urghh haha

Hey just texted me saying "what u doing"

And I'm not going to reply 🙂 he did my head in for a WEEK. Lets see how he likes it muuuahahah. The scorpion is BACK 😄

don't play games for too long. its just gonna get ugly and get nowhere fast. but i guess at least its coming from a place of love lol

yeah.. I don't like games!!!! That's why I'm kind of worried, and am not sure how long to do it for? He can be very stubborn, so I don't want this to back fire and for him to be even more mean.. I just think it's unfair how he has been to me, and am not sure how to handle it now? He knows I have my phone on me all the time so he knows I'm purposely ignoring him! What should I reply? "Sorry been heaps busy, just at home now. Have a good night x" — Ahhh I dunno OMG he JUST wrote ANOTHER MESSAGE saying "oh yeah" cause he knows I'm ignoring him what do I do haha

Ok I wrote back this: hey sorry been heaps busy! just sortin out my lunch for tomorrow and going to sleep

Didn't give him an invitation to write back by asking what he's doin lol

I hope this doesn't aggregate him? It's annoying though cause he doesn't wb for ages I sometimes do a "?" (Haven't done it in ages) and that makes me annoying and clingy but when I don't write back he's allowed to write "oh yeah" and it's okay. What's the difference!?

Just answer him, but keep it simple and in your time. Not days on end! And don't invite him, wait for him to invite you and come for you. If you ignore him, he'll either move on or not be bothered with your dramas again!

And stop stressing, you're sounding too desperate to us and he's sure to pick that up. You guys are either meant to be together or NOT and even if you play your games and get him back...how long will it be for? So learn to relax and appreciate what you bring to the table because if he can't see that then he will never see it!

I sound super desperate to all you guys I know but TRUST me, I am not showing my desperation to him at ALL!' I'm playing it cool.. Also I'm not even that desperate anymore I've chilled out

guys smell desperation from a mile off! you are in your prime and looking for the father of your children are you not? Trust me, these guys know what yo girls all want and at this time of your lives and I live in the Gold Coast and see you lovely young things everywhere!!!

Posted by scorpio24
Ok I wrote back this: hey sorry been heaps busy! just sortin out my lunch for tomorrow and going to sleep

Didn't give him an invitation to write back by asking what he's doin lol

You have come along way 🙂 You are coming back!!! Only thing, The best reply would have been to only answer the question. He only asked what are you doing? You gave him an apology for your absence & gave every detail about where you are & doing. But it's okay this time. You are not where you was before.. You did not expect an reply! Very good. Because you are the Prize walking these streets! But next time your answers should mirror his questions.

Be as brief as he is :

He texts: what you doing?
You text: nothing much.

He texts: where are you
You text: with my friend out

He texts: have a good day
You text: thanks

He text: oh yeah
You text: nothing back.

My point: when he's ready to talk deeper & not on the surface, you will too. Until then, Give NO details. Give NO apologizes. He Is NOT Your Farther ! I'm not into making you play games with him. My goal is for you to see how he's just a man, just regular. So you treat him like he's just regular & not overly special. Therefore you remember to never go back to ever needing ANY man! 🙂

My goal is to regain that confidence Scorpio24. Because its there ! You ARE better 🙂

Good god is everyone going to hold her hand thru the entire "relationship"?

you need to start handling things on your own...everyone has giving you great advice and now its time for you to figure it out. I'm not trying to be mean...but this is a little ridiculous. I know everyone comes here for advice and thats fine...but to come on here each time something happens.....instead of figuring it out on your own (you are 22)is a little to much.

Posted by scorpio24
I sound super desperate to all you guys I know but TRUST me, I am not showing my desperation to him at ALL!' I'm playing it cool.. Also I'm not even that desperate anymore I've chilled out

That first step would be to stop posting, thinking, evaluating, dissecting, and generally relating everything back to this Virgo. The more we talk about it, the more it's going to stay on your mind. Closure is awesome but realise sometimes you won't get it.

Also there's a body, spirit and mind expo that's going to be in Sydney soon, not sure whereabouts you're from but it's worth checking out if that's your cup of tea.

Posted by LostinmyMind11
Good god is everyone going to hold her hand thru the entire "relationship"?

you need to start handling things on your own...everyone has giving you great advice and now its time for you to figure it out. I'm not trying to be mean...but this is a little ridiculous. I know everyone comes here for advice and thats fine...but to come on here each time something happens.....instead of figuring it out on your own (you are 22)is a little to much.

I'm getting so sick of this topic being on the top.

There's only so much people can tell you before their just repeating them selves!

Posted by scorpio24
I sound super desperate to all you guys I know but TRUST me, I am not showing my desperation to him at ALL!' I'm playing it cool.. Also I'm not even that desperate anymore I've chilled out

If you weren't desperate you will be out there focusing on the present, work, school, friends, family, hobbies, tv, world peace, etc.

Instead you are dissecting his every move and getting excited for a text... get a life and if you already have a life besides your Virgo, I hope you do, stop giving all your energy to him and this relationship, stop your life from revolving around a simple guy...
Enjoy your life and be cool instead of pretending or playing cool. When you are actually happy and enjoying your life you don't need to play it cool, you just are... Men in general have neediness and desperation radar, they smell it feel it, some will run from it and others take advantage of it...

Posted by scorpio24
yeah.. I don't like games!!!!

Why do they have to be games when a woman starts to mirror a guys actions? When men disappear, don't text/call that's exactly what they do, they play games.

I don't believe it to be game playing at all when the woman does it. I call it "taking a stand against bullshit". Bet he won't like it when it's done to him.

Posted by Dafna79

Posted by scorpio24
I sound super desperate to all you guys I know but TRUST me, I am not showing my desperation to him at ALL!' I'm playing it cool.. Also I'm not even that desperate anymore I've chilled out

Men in general have neediness and desperation radar, they smell it feel it, some will run from it and others take advantage of it...

click to expand

This. Been there & done that. Will NEVER return. Learned my lesson the hard way.

Posted by LostinmyMind11
Good god is everyone going to hold her hand thru the entire "relationship"?

you need to start handling things on your own...everyone has giving you great advice and now its time for you to figure it out. I'm not trying to be mean...but this is a little ridiculous. I know everyone comes here for advice and thats fine...but to come on here each time something happens.....instead of figuring it out on your own (you are 22)is a little to much.

This.

Posted by tiziani
Doing it for a reacting or for "mirroring" is playing a game. Because it's not about what he wants or what he will do.


It's about doing what you want to do. If I don't pick up the phone to someone, it's because I legitimately don't want to speak to them. So if that's what you want to do, go for it. Bottom line, be yourself.

Well that's you. Kudos...& that's what I WANT to do. Give him a run for his money. If ya call that games, I'm the fucking coach then.

I only read the 1st post.. I'm NOT going thru all 17pgs..

1st and foremost.. GREAT work detective!!! (I LOVE a good find).
2nd-ly: (((HUUUGE HEALING HUGS to you)))

I said this before in another "Snoop" thread..and will say it again.. your instincts already gave you an inkling to the approaching end. So, better to find out sooner on YOUR terms (even if it was done thru snooping) than to play the waiting game awaiting the upcoming pain for him to stab you -straight- to the chest..

You did well to pack everything, & leaving the key behind. He will see that you came over and will be SHOCKED that you were 10 steps ahead of HIS game. DON'T ..I repeat...DON'T answer any of his calls or texts..DELETE EVERY Contact of his from your phone.. DEFRIEND &/or BLOCK him on ALL social Networks. Cut ALL access and avenues to you away from him. This man needs to deal with the DEAFENING Silence he gave you. But in reverse.

I wish I could throw you a party, you need nothing but love and happiness around you. If you're near family and/or have a great network of friends.. stay in their company..Stay with each of them a week at a time so you're not home, where he can find you. Do things that will make YOU happy. Spa wknd, impromptu trip to a nice sunny beach with clear crystal waters.

SOoo sorry that you're going thru this, I can feel your pain. Heartbreak is the lowest feelings to ever feel. But you won't stay there. YOU WILL MAKE IT Through.

((HUGS))..
~TB.

Posted by TAURUSbelle
I only read the 1st post.. I'm NOT going thru all 17pgs..

you have to read all 17 pages to know whats going on haha we are still together..

but thanks anyway for the kind words 🙂

Okay, long story short.. I went to his place tonight and we went to the shopping centre and he got a hair cut, we did some shopping etc. I was naturally acting myself and wasnt being needy for attention.. We get home and were watching tv together but I was physically keeping my space.. I could felt him from the side and could feel him staring At me for ages when I finally turned he was trying to hide his smile.. He slowly started getting closer and closer and was smelling me lol and cuddling me like there is no tomorrow, I told him I didn't feel like sleeping with him and he didn't care he just wanted to hug me and was kissing my forehead and kissing me all over my face haha. He wanted me to sleep over but I said I wanted to sleep in my own bed, I acted happy and relaxed (which I was thank god) so yes.

Lesson learnt: do not be over needy with a guy and depend on them to keep you happy, have to love myself and realize only I can make myself happy.

Hope it stays this way!!!

Remember how crazy you went just a few days ago? Keep that in mind for the future, not just for your relationship, but life in times of crisis.