Help me understand this Gemini

I'm friends with a gemini man whom I've known for about 8 years now.. we reconnected a couple of months ago after a fall out cause of some misunderstanding.

Long story short, when we first got to know eachother he loved me but I had no such feelings towards him.. and we remained friends on n off.. now since we reconnected I feel love towards him but I can't really show it until we meet again face to face cause we've been only texting since then and I need to understand my emotions.

I asked him out before to give him some gift I got for him when I was traveling (he knows about it) and he seemed excited but said he may be busy the days I suggested, the days passed and he didn't suggest another day to meet up. I brought it up again that we could go out but he's always busy and he confirmed that he's busy even on some weekends..

Now I was asking him if he tried out some sport and he said he did and asked whom I'm going to play with, I told him I'm just curious about it. This annoyed him and said how I'm being a dodger, and that he doesn't bite. It didn't cross my mind but I realized he wanted me to invite him to play with me.

I don't understand why isn't he being direct with me? Even when I check on him on the weekends he says he's not doing anything.. mostly I'm the one who's traveling on weekends. But even the weekends when I wasn't traveling I let him know, and he didn't ask me out.

I am so confused.. he seems to want me to ask him out but when I do he declines, yet he is annoyed that I'm not asking him?! When we first knew eachother he was actually persistent on asking me out and he was coming on too strong, now it seems he's different.

Help me understand pls.

His placements:

Gemini Sun, Taurus Moon, Gemini Mercury, Taurus Venus, Aries Mars

My placements:

Taurus Sun, Scorpio Moon, Taurus Mercury, Aries Venus, Pisces Mars

Posted by MonaLisa26
I haven’t read the post after I realized it’s about Gem man - sign I despise the most out of all Zodiac…

If you want to know Gem man - read Jumping Jupiter’s posts.

It’s full of self praise (I bet not justified by anything), all sorts of baseless brain farts, tons of attempts to seem intelligent - failing every time…shit!!!

I can see Gem man can be in use if like LadyNeptunes Gem who apparently has some placements that making him spineless, submissive and holding onto her because she provides some papers or status for him…there is a trick.



That’s why I am saying - it CAN work technically but Gem man must have a reason not to be stupid goof - otherwise you are getting a man who went for pack of cigarette and you never see him UNLESS he needs you and comes back because he can use you.



This is my perspective on Gem men in general though you can still believe in miracles.

I actually appreciate Jumping Jupiter's posts.. lol

You rejected him once, then friend-zoned him, then fall out with him recently.... and now you seem to want something different, but you are not sure what. Either you give up and change your focus, or are honest and ask him on a date. Right now you are playing games and he's not interested in them.

Was he really annoyed? Or was he teasing you and being playful and you took it as actual annoyance. Best way to treat geminis is to always take the default position that they are trolling you.

Posted by LadyNeptune
Was he really annoyed? Or was he teasing you and being playful and you took it as actual annoyance. Best way to treat geminis is to always take the default position that they are trolling you.

Nah it wasn't teasing ...it was the grumpy twin

So when he finally called for a chat .. It turned out he's busy and he told me he doesn't want to set a date and then wouldn't be able to make it and he knows that it's what bothered me before. I told him that I don't mind if we decide on the same day (I really don't mind cause I want to meet him so much).

Part of me wants to be cool about it and the other part is just thinking.. if he's really that into me he would want to leave everything to just see me. But I know apart from work, he also takes care of his mother so.... I'm not sure if I'm allowing him to be careless or I'm being considerate..

Puzzled

Taurus Venus is stubborn

Mars in Aries would initiate if they wanted to

I wouldn’t make any more moves

Posted by DragonSag

Posted by TxOgal
So when he finally called for a chat .. It turned out he's busy and he told me he doesn't want to set a date and then wouldn't be able to make it and he knows that it's what bothered me before. I told him that I don't mind if we decide on the same day (I really don't mind cause I want to meet him so much).



Part of me wants to be cool about it and the other part is just thinking.. if he's really that into me he would want to leave everything to just see me. But I know apart from work, he also takes care of his mother so.... I'm not sure if I'm allowing him to be careless or I'm being considerate..



Puzzled

The part of you thinking he would leave everything to just see you - is the one that is correct! Trust your instinct. Believe me, when they truly want you, they have no limits, I know so many of them to be 100% certain at this. I know it hurts to realize this cause I'm on the same boat in some way, but that's the truth. Always knew this and always kept it in mind. Some of them were willing to move to another country to live with their loved one even if it was worse for them, some of them searched their loved person in foreign country, some of them gave up on amazing job offers to stay with person they loved...they show it when they have it in them. Sure, things can get in the way, but from what you're describing it sounds more like he's avoiding you than what he's telling you. Also, they don't even set a date to meet a lot of time, they just randomly hit you up to see if you can meet. My friend is like that all the time, we agree to meet like hour before the meeting 😂 Has he tried that at all? How long have you been waiting to see him really?

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"Also, they don't even set a date to meet a lot of time, they just randomly hit you up to see if you can meet. My friend is like that all the time, we agree to meet like hour before the meeting"

What you said there is exactly what he told me when he meets up with his friends

And well I've been waiting for like 2 months... I travel on the weekends and he mentioned that before, but well I stayed in the city a couple of weekends and he didn't do anything about it..

Before, he would really be pushy to see me and I was the one who had excuses ..sigh I wish to just get him out of my head and stop waiting

Posted by Kachi
we've been only texting since then and I need to understand my emotions.



You guys are playing cat and mouse. It's either, you guys need to clarify, through self reflection, how you feel about each other or pride hinders you both from moving forward (whichever that maybe). Either way, it's all part of the journey I guess.

I think we are both unsure maybe.. or at least I am.

Gemini energy is all over the place

Conflicted

Changeable and restless

I’d not try to understand

Posted by DragonSag

Posted by TxOgal

Posted by DragonSag

Posted by TxOgal
So when he finally called for a chat .. It turned out he's busy and he told me he doesn't want to set a date and then wouldn't be able to make it and he knows that it's what bothered me before. I told him that I don't mind if we decide on the same day (I really don't mind cause I want to meet him so much).



Part of me wants to be cool about it and the other part is just thinking.. if he's really that into me he would want to leave everything to just see me. But I know apart from work, he also takes care of his mother so.... I'm not sure if I'm allowing him to be careless or I'm being considerate..



Puzzled

The part of you thinking he would leave everything to just see you - is the one that is correct! Trust your instinct. Believe me, when they truly want you, they have no limits, I know so many of them to be 100% certain at this. I know it hurts to realize this cause I'm on the same boat in some way, but that's the truth. Always knew this and always kept it in mind. Some of them were willing to move to another country to live with their loved one even if it was worse for them, some of them searched their loved person in foreign country, some of them gave up on amazing job offers to stay with person they loved...they show it when they have it in them. Sure, things can get in the way, but from what you're describing it sounds more like he's avoiding you than what he's telling you. Also, they don't even set a date to meet a lot of time, they just randomly hit you up to see if you can meet. My friend is like that all the time, we agree to meet like hour before the meeting 😂 Has he tried that at all? How long have you been waiting to see him really?
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"Also, they don't even set a date to meet a lot of time, they just randomly hit you up to see if you can meet. My friend is like that all the time, we agree to meet like hour before the meeting"



What you said there is exactly what he told me when he meets up with his friends



And well I've been waiting for like 2 months... I travel on the weekends and he mentioned that before, but well I stayed in the city a couple of weekends and he didn't do anything about it..



Before, he would really be pushy to see me and I was the one who had excuses ..sigh I wish to just get him out of my head and stop waiting
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That's just how they roll often - go with the flow. They don't like setting up precise dates or planning too much ahead and they like surprises. But honestly, 2 months is too long time not to get time to meet with you. They can fall of the face of the Earth at times but if they want to see you they make time for you for sure.

You answered your own questions here as well. You know him from before, you said he was pushy to see you before so you know that other side of him as well. That's the side when they're in love. Again, I haven't been in relationship with any of them but I know so many of them to know how they are in relationships.

He expected from you to be spontaneous at a time when he was cause he was in love with you and since you didn't feel the same way at a time he probably cooled himself down. Some signs can wait for someone to develop feelings for them (like Pisces for example, tried to get me there over several years), some might fight for your love, but some stop after initial rejection and imo those to stop right away are certainly Gem-Sag axis. Development on the situation will greatly depend on how other side reciprocates them.

I'll give you an example of same Gem guy who first hit on my Scorp friend and later married my Sag friend. He was chatting with Scorp first and he sent her his schedule so she could fit herself in when she want to go out with him and needless to say she found thet to be a turn off 😅 Sag he called out and they fell in love very quickly, went through a lot together, even been in LDR for a while. So why one worked and the other didn't is simply cause they both wanted same things and had no doubts about liking each other or going out, making plans etc.

I hope you resolve your situation soon and find happiness with or without him. Maybe give it one last try, call him out of the blue at some point and suggest meeting later that day. If he rejects that I would just give it up completely. I know it's not fair and people have plans but they adjust plans when they want to see you and 2 months is plenty of time to push you in somewhere in his schedule.

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well that all makes sense... our timing is always off.. he even realized that... I have no idea how will this work out.. but yeah I think I'd give it a try maybe this weekend I suggest something. I wish I had the same feelings back then, but I believe everything happens for a reason and I think I know why.

Thanks all really for your input. I appreciate each one. It helped me make sense of the whole situation

xx

@DragonSag

Do you have sun in Virgo?

He's just not interested. I'm married to a Gem and I rejected him so many times before we finally went out and he never gave up. He's been the best husband I've had, he's loyal, hard working and strong. He's done everything for me. They like to have fun and he would never reject you that many times if he were interested. You said he used to love you. Did he tell you he was in love with you?

Posted by DonnaLibra
He's just not interested. I'm married to a Gem and I rejected him so many times before we finally went out and he never gave up. He's been the best husband I've had, he's loyal, hard working and strong. He's done everything for me. They like to have fun and he would never reject you that many times if he were interested. You said he used to love you. Did he tell you he was in love with you?

He did, but that was some years ago.. and I actually had to cut contact cause whenever he said he's over it he opens up again about his feelings for me. I think I had a thread about it here and it was so hard for me even cause I really liked him as a friend at that time and didn't want to lose him, but even after cutting contact he'd find a way back into my life somehow..

He didn't totally reject the idea.. but he's always unsure of when.. we still talk everyday and if we go a day without any contact he'd throw in a text about how I forgot about him.. I think maybe he's not ready to meet up

Posted by DragonSag

Posted by MyStarsShine
@DragonSag

Do you have sun in Virgo?

I'm Sag😅 what made you think Virgo?

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I thought I saw you write it somewhere

😂😃

So you’re fire ☀️ and 🌝?

Posted by DragonSag

Posted by MyStarsShine

Posted by DragonSag

Posted by MyStarsShine
@DragonSag

Do you have sun in Virgo?

I'm Sag😅 what made you think Virgo?
click to expand

I thought I saw you write it somewhere

😂😃

So you’re fire ☀️ and 🌝?
click to expand

Also fire, yes - Aries Moon

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🔥 💥😃

My closest friend is double fire

She’s never satisfied 😂

Posted by DragonSag

Posted by MyStarsShine

Posted by DragonSag

Posted by MyStarsShine

Posted by DragonSag

Posted by MyStarsShine
@DragonSag

Do you have sun in Virgo?

I'm Sag😅 what made you think Virgo?
click to expand

I thought I saw you write it somewhere

😂😃

So you’re fire ☀️ and 🌝?
click to expand

Also fire, yes - Aries Moon
click to expand

🔥 💥😃

My closest friend is double fire

She’s never satisfied 😂
click to expand

It's a curse😅 there is always more to want for...

click to expand

This is the Spring, Summer, Autumn and Winter of our discontent

😃😂🙃

@TxOgal you and I actually share three placements other than our sun and moon. Aries Venus goes after what they want so I’m sure his behavior is making you crazy now. We DO like to chase, don’t we? 😂

The Gems I know are all so completely different from each other that I can’t speak to a “type”. My Cancer moon makes me a fool for love 🥲 which plays against the Gem stereotype.

Dude’s got an Aries Mars so I’m thinking he’s not the shy type. Do you feel like you can have a chat about this with him and talk about the mixed messages and general weirdness? OR in true Aries Venus style ask him out and make it clear it’s not just as friends? Either way, you’ll know won’t you?

Posted by geminiflyby
@TxOgal you and I actually share three placements other than our sun and moon. Aries Venus goes after what they want so I’m sure his behavior is making you crazy now. We DO like to chase, don’t we? 😂



The Gems I know are all so completely different from each other that I can’t speak to a “type”. My Cancer moon makes me a fool for love 🥲 which plays against the Gem stereotype.



Dude’s got an Aries Mars so I’m thinking he’s not the shy type. Do you feel like you can have a chat about this with him and talk about the mixed messages and general weirdness? OR in true Aries Venus style ask him out and make it clear it’s not just as friends? Either way, you’ll know won’t you?

Yeah he is driving me crazy lol I am actually not that bold.. I can hint, compliment, but he really doesn't get these subtle signs (he's always been like this). Plus I'm not sure about my own feelings.. I just want to meet him even as just friends.... maybe then I'd be sure of what I feel and maybe get clear about it. I think it's obvious to me now that I have to ask him out one more time 🤦🏻‍♀️

So a coupls of days ago I kind of dropped a hint and he was like let's meet up this weekend. But then, he's texting much much less and says his mood is just off (well I knew it was due some things at his job) but well it's the weekend and he still texts like nothing happened, and didn't bring up meeting up again...

I'm not sure if I want to meet him anymore.. I feel it's all to waste. I won't force him to go out.. if he doesn't want it it's fine. But really I'm dying to know what's wrong with him?!!

I'm happy I was busy all the time and went out with my friends, not cancelling plans for him... I would have been really frustrated

Posted by DragonSag
Girl...do you really need a guy you have to wait for months just to see him? You know that saying - who want so see you makes time to see you, who doesn't makes up excuses. And it applies to that Gemini and any other person on this planet.

They change their minds, behavior and attitude like hourly, but that is not an excuse not to see you for so long if he really wanted to. To point out just what I'm referring to I'll tell you that one situation with "mine". It was Friday and since everyone else was in another room we were alone and talked a bit and he's saying how he really wishes nice weather for the weekend and how he would LOVE to go somewhere in the nature where there are no people at all. And guess what he DID do on the weekend? Got drunk with some friends while at clubs.

As you can see they can say one thing and do exact opposite, I'm sure they have reasons for that, but do you need that? Or is it better to deal with someone who says something and actually goes through with it?

I don't know why I keep giving him chances.. n excuses.. I will back off now, it's only frustrating me

Posted by Midnite_Riser

Posted by TxOgal
I'm friends with a gemini man whom I've known for about 8 years now.. we reconnected a couple of months ago after a fall out cause of some misunderstanding.



Long story short, when we first got to know eachother he loved me but I had no such feelings towards him.. and we remained friends on n off.. now since we reconnected I feel love towards him but I can't really show it until we meet again face to face cause we've been only texting since then and I need to understand my emotions.



I asked him out before to give him some gift I got for him when I was traveling (he knows about it) and he seemed excited but said he may be busy the days I suggested, the days passed and he didn't suggest another day to meet up. I brought it up again that we could go out but he's always busy and he confirmed that he's busy even on some weekends..



Now I was asking him if he tried out some sport and he said he did and asked whom I'm going to play with, I told him I'm just curious about it. This annoyed him and said how I'm being a dodger, and that he doesn't bite. It didn't cross my mind but I realized he wanted me to invite him to play with me.



I don't understand why isn't he being direct with me? Even when I check on him on the weekends he says he's not doing anything.. mostly I'm the one who's traveling on weekends. But even the weekends when I wasn't traveling I let him know, and he didn't ask me out.



I am so confused.. he seems to want me to ask him out but when I do he declines, yet he is annoyed that I'm not asking him?! When we first knew eachother he was actually persistent on asking me out and he was coming on too strong, now it seems he's different.



Help me understand pls.



His placements:

Gemini Sun, Taurus Moon, Gemini Mercury, Taurus Venus, Aries Mars



My placements:

Taurus Sun, Scorpio Moon, Taurus Mercury, Aries Venus, Pisces Mars

Just with that your charts alone, he ain't that compatible with you. You have opposite moons which means there's is an intense push and pull of emotional energies. There is romantic and sexual compatibility but that's about it. His Sun and Mercury doesn't match yours so ofcourse there will be misunderstandings. It is because your minds and the way you both communicate don't match up. Remember you are dealing with 2 different mercury signs coming from 2 different elements.

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That could explain why we have many misunderstandings.. it's funny that we have good diacussions when it comes to any other topic but ourselves... I really enjoy talking to him and he said that he does ...but when it comes to what he expects from me or what I expect from him... it is a real puzzle

Update..

We rarely talk now since another fallout cause he wanted me to do something that I didn't feel like, so he was acting all weird, we ended up far apart now. Only random how r u texts every couple of weeks.

Last week I saw a deleted text from him and then he sent a text saying I thought you were still up. I told him I'm up and striked up a short conversation. The next day I saw a text from him that said "I miss you" but then he deleted it rightaway so I asked him what was that? and he said it's nothing (it's like the 3rd time he deletes a message on he same day) He even said that he's upset and I said jokingly that I don't like pushing, which he misunderstood.

Today, I woke up to a deleted message again and he was like "I was testing connection" so lame I thought but just went with it. Now I am annoyed by his deleted messages and he used to go insane when I deleted a message (which rarely happened).

Why is he not being straight forward with what's up??

Posted by TxOgal
Update..


We rarely talk now since another fallout cause he wanted me to do something that I didn't feel like, so he was acting all weird, we ended up far apart now. Only random how r u texts every couple of weeks.


Last week I saw a deleted text from him and then he sent a text saying I thought you were still up. I told him I'm up and striked up a short conversation. The next day I saw a text from him that said "I miss you" but then he deleted it rightaway so I asked him what was that? and he said it's nothing (it's like the 3rd time he deletes a message on he same day) He even said that he's upset and I said jokingly that I don't like pushing, which he misunderstood.


Today, I woke up to a deleted message again and he was like "I was testing connection" so lame I thought but just went with it. Now I am annoyed by his deleted messages and he used to go insane when I deleted a message (which rarely happened).


Why is he not being straight forward with what's up??

Why don't you send him a text telling him to stop playing on your phone and say what's on his mind, cause his games and deleted texts are annoying?

Seems like he's trying to see if he's blocked or something.

Posted by Findingbalance

Posted by TxOgal
Update..


We rarely talk now since another fallout cause he wanted me to do something that I didn't feel like, so he was acting all weird, we ended up far apart now. Only random how r u texts every couple of weeks.


Last week I saw a deleted text from him and then he sent a text saying I thought you were still up. I told him I'm up and striked up a short conversation. The next day I saw a text from him that said "I miss you" but then he deleted it rightaway so I asked him what was that? and he said it's nothing (it's like the 3rd time he deletes a message on he same day) He even said that he's upset and I said jokingly that I don't like pushing, which he misunderstood.


Today, I woke up to a deleted message again and he was like "I was testing connection" so lame I thought but just went with it. Now I am annoyed by his deleted messages and he used to go insane when I deleted a message (which rarely happened).


Why is he not being straight forward with what's up??

Possibly for the same reasons you weren't, ie dropped hints, etc?

click to expand

I am tired of his "absent answers" I have been direct with him many times but he never gives answers, not even giving any hints. I think he expects me to magically read his mind. One thing I could never do, neither could he. We think differently when it comes to anything between us/our friendship

Posted by thelittlestars
Most likely he wants you to step up to the plate since he was or is in love with you. If you rejected him before he’s going to be extra cautious. If you want to try with him, being firm and direct about what you want. Anything else he will be able to sus out any contradictions in your actions.


However Tbh I dunno if this dude is worth it, if he seems to be holding it against you that you didn’t go with him already then he sounds pretty emotionally immature.

Well you are right about that. He is still not over the time when I cut contact before. He told me that it's like several things that seem petty add up to that as well, and that it will take time.

It seems he really wants me to try harder ....sigh

I can't blame him though.. I would feel different being in his place.. we finally decided to meet up when I'm back to the country. And one more thing that annoyed him is how I'm being vague when he asks me about stuff and how it makes it difficult for him to open up too (I'm usually secretive but thought he got used to it).

eh lame story ..that's life I guess lol

Posted by GeminiJim

Posted by TxOgal

Posted by Findingbalance

Posted by TxOgal
Update..

We rarely talk now since another fallout cause he wanted me to do something that I didn't feel like, so he was acting all weird, we ended up far apart now. Only random how r u texts every couple of weeks.

Last week I saw a deleted text from him and then he sent a text saying I thought you were still up. I told him I'm up and striked up a short conversation. The next day I saw a text from him that said "I miss you" but then he deleted it rightaway so I asked him what was that? and he said it's nothing (it's like the 3rd time he deletes a message on he same day) He even said that he's upset and I said jokingly that I don't like pushing, which he misunderstood.

Today, I woke up to a deleted message again and he was like "I was testing connection" so lame I thought but just went with it. Now I am annoyed by his deleted messages and he used to go insane when I deleted a message (which rarely happened).

Why is he not being straight forward with what's up??

Possibly for the same reasons you weren't, ie dropped hints, etc?
click to expand

I am tired of his "absent answers" I have been direct with him many times but he never gives answers, not even giving any hints. I think he expects me to magically read his mind. One thing I could never do, neither could he. We think differently when it comes to anything between us/our friendship

I think what you need to realise is that he doesn't know that's why he doesn't give answers. At some point you have to think "Gemini" and not be like why isn't he like this or like that.. if it doesn't suit you then accept the fact that the two of you won't have resolution
People might say "oh Gemini twins, different from one day to the next.." well, yes, that is true. It's not something that will be changed. If you don't like it then that will upset him because it is who he is. It's not a "fault", regardless of whether people like it or not
He's not straightforward with you because he is not straightforward inside

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Sounds fair enough... it's hard for anyone to change the way they are. It's either you like their character or not.. It felt like I'm grabbing answers from him, but then after what you said, I somewhat understand

Posted by TxOgal
I'm friends with a gemini man whom I've known for about 8 years now.. we reconnected a couple of months ago after a fall out cause of some misunderstanding.


Long story short, when we first got to know eachother he loved me but I had no such feelings towards him.. and we remained friends on n off.. now since we reconnected I feel love towards him but I can't really show it until we meet again face to face cause we've been only texting since then and I need to understand my emotions.


I asked him out before to give him some gift I got for him when I was traveling (he knows about it) and he seemed excited but said he may be busy the days I suggested, the days passed and he didn't suggest another day to meet up. I brought it up again that we could go out but he's always busy and he confirmed that he's busy even on some weekends..


Now I was asking him if he tried out some sport and he said he did and asked whom I'm going to play with, I told him I'm just curious about it. This annoyed him and said how I'm being a dodger, and that he doesn't bite. It didn't cross my mind but I realized he wanted me to invite him to play with me.


I don't understand why isn't he being direct with me? Even when I check on him on the weekends he says he's not doing anything.. mostly I'm the one who's traveling on weekends. But even the weekends when I wasn't traveling I let him know, and he didn't ask me out.


I am so confused.. he seems to want me to ask him out but when I do he declines, yet he is annoyed that I'm not asking him?! When we first knew eachother he was actually persistent on asking me out and he was coming on too strong, now it seems he's different.


Help me understand pls.


His placements:

Gemini Sun, Taurus Moon, Gemini Mercury, Taurus Venus, Aries Mars


My placements:

Taurus Sun, Scorpio Moon, Taurus Mercury, Aries Venus, Pisces Mars

An 8 year off and on friendship with a man who professed love at the beginning...

where you had a falling out as friends...

...are still friends...

...he has no idea that you changed your mind after 8 years...

...because...

Quote:

..."can't really show it until we meet again face to face cause we've been only texting since then and...

...I need to understand my emotions."

GURL STOP

Leave that poor man alone. GAHD#

Gobsmacked might be right y'all. Sorry.

Update: Can't believe I posted this 5 months ago! We finally went out yesterday. It was totally spontaneous and I suggested it cause he said he'll be free. I'm happy we met and it really validated my feelings towards him. I wish I know what he's feeling about me, but my gut says there is something that he holds back. I think he still likes me, not sure if it's the same way as before, but something's there that he doesn't want to tell, maybe out of fear or maybe he's hesitant. But he said we have to repeat it and kept saying that he really had a good time and is happy we met.

One thing I know for sure is he's still hurt from my past reactions.. I wish I were a wiser person back then before I hit the block button 😢 It could be the only thing I regret doing.