Londonelixer
@Londonelixer
9 Years
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Aqua woman ... is she for real? (Page 2)
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Posted by LondonelixerMaybe you are right. This is the second time that I kinda pushed her away, just to get a reaction from her. And it works.. she is there, she contacts me...
Obviously there are many aspects that effect the outcome of this. But for now your best option is to either give her all the space she wants/needs or walk away from the situation.
Only you can make the decision. She's told you how she feels right now, whether you feel she's being honest or hiding her feelings is irrelevant, you just have to give her the space. But just be there also. Things I mentioned earlier.
Maybe she is closing off at the moment because she does feel a lot for you, the continued theme is that those they care for receive less attention... again this is my experience and the advice I've received.
She knows exactly how I feel about her (she even teased me over that), I hope she's not that evil to hurt me. It would be much easier if she would tell me that she doesn't want anything.
I know what you mean by hiding from her feelings. Hope this is the case.
You said your story is similar? How?
Was seeing an Aqua lady from August till November. But in that time things were great, from her and from me. Like we both wished we met sooner. Given the fact we'd seen each other on public transport for years without saying anything.
Anyway, in November she started a new job which has taken a lot of her time and is a whole new challenge. Global head of a department. With that she has said she can't do a relationship atm. And needs to focus on her, equally I know how much she wants this job. Not once as she said its me. Or she never what's to see me again.
Whilst it's been hard to accept that as it came out of the blue I completely get it. And don't want to distract her. So I'm here, doing my own thing. Thinking of her. Making her laugh. Doing my own thing. You'll get very little contact if she is really in her own world. Don't push for a response. But let her know youre still around. Just hyperthetically ask things. Be casual.
Anyway, in November she started a new job which has taken a lot of her time and is a whole new challenge. Global head of a department. With that she has said she can't do a relationship atm. And needs to focus on her, equally I know how much she wants this job. Not once as she said its me. Or she never what's to see me again.
Whilst it's been hard to accept that as it came out of the blue I completely get it. And don't want to distract her. So I'm here, doing my own thing. Thinking of her. Making her laugh. Doing my own thing. You'll get very little contact if she is really in her own world. Don't push for a response. But let her know youre still around. Just hyperthetically ask things. Be casual.
Well, maybe I didn't explain it right from the beginning myself... Sorry for the long post...
So, we are co-workers, but we don't have much in common at work. We've met 2 years ago when I was married. Then, at one time she gave me a small hint that she likes me. Then I continued with my marriage, we spoke mainly work from time to time.. At some point I told her that my marriage is not going well etc etc.
Fast fw to June this year, I got separated from my wife in May, told her that and then things starting moving between me her, mainly from her part. Mainly texting.. but she was hitting on me. We've met once, in July, it was wow, no sex, just kissing. She told me then that she can create addiction and I should be careful that she has a daughter. I was like... ok... whatever... not very interested. In the meantime, the 2 women that I ever lover were all of a sudden hitting on me.
Fast fw to October... we spend a few hours in a night, just talking/kissing in the car.. then I told her about those two women and that I don't think that it will lead to something serious with them. She told me about a friend of her.. friend with benefits that was married and doing her almost every night. She said she knows she doesn't have a future with him, but its been going on like that for them for 3 years.. From then on things for us started to get serious. We started to care for each other more. We would talk on whatsapp all day, sometimes speak on the phone for hours at night, after her FWB had left 🙂 I didn't mind that then.
We realised that things are getting serious and because I wanted to give it a shot with one of the other ladies (an old friend, who was my first love), we decided to stop talking. It lasted a few hours. Then we tried again. Same result. We just couldn't not speak to each other.
After my divorce (middle of October), we had amazing sex one night. After that she told me that she cannot have sex anymore with her FWB. And I have told my old friend that I cannot continue, that I'm not ready for a relationship. Then the entire month of November was an amazing roller coaster with my Aqua. We were like almost in a relationship, except the sex part 😢 But when we felt that things get serious she would back off a bit, just for a few hours, or a couple of days and would come back. I told her I love her, she gave a me hint that she loves me, didn't said it out loud. She wouldn't speak much about her FWB, I wouldn't speak much about those two women. Step by step she conquered my world and by the end of the month I would end up things for good with both of the others (btw, with the others there was no sex, just emotional things). My Aqua told me things that rocked my world, she has a way with words: we have all the ingredients for a +50yrs relationship, that Im perfect for her, that she misses me the second I leave, that Im the first person that she is considering for a relationship during the last 5 years after her divorce etc etc.. We slept together a month ago, no real sex, because 'she was not 100% ready' (but we had sex once in October)... Her daughter loves me, her best friend likes me and hates her FWB 🙂) Even her FWB said that she looks in love and she told him thats true.
And now came December with that stupid trip I took with my old friend. And looks like from then on the Aqua started to back off. Im not sure if its that, or its just a coincidence. And things now are veeeery different from what they were. We chat everyday, but she is in a different emotional place. I think she's started seeing her FWB again (they are friends anyway, but the sex part I think its on again). She says she doesn't want a relationship, at least not now, that she feels ok to be alone. I know that its not true, because a couple of months ago she wanted to get back with her ex husband just to not be alone...
I have told her twice in the past week how I feel for her, that she is the one, that I want to take things slowly and build our moments together. She knows exactly how I feel for her, she told me that.
If she knows that, whats with the change?? She got scared? She hates me for going in that trip (she never mentioned something like that, just that I didn't called her, when she made it very very clear that she doesn't want to talk during those days, even though I tried once)? She said she doesn't know whats with her, that she was never like this, that she has no feelings now, its just her and her daughter. But she does want to speak with me, we chat a bit everyday, even though I told her I will let her alone, to figure out her feelings for me. She didn't reply to that, but we still talk, and she initiates.
Im fcking confused about all this, especially now that her FWB is back.... or at least I think he is.
Sorry for the long post, must be the longest here on dxp 🙂)) I got really angry because of the FWB part and her emotional distance.
So, we are co-workers, but we don't have much in common at work. We've met 2 years ago when I was married. Then, at one time she gave me a small hint that she likes me. Then I continued with my marriage, we spoke mainly work from time to time.. At some point I told her that my marriage is not going well etc etc.
Fast fw to June this year, I got separated from my wife in May, told her that and then things starting moving between me her, mainly from her part. Mainly texting.. but she was hitting on me. We've met once, in July, it was wow, no sex, just kissing. She told me then that she can create addiction and I should be careful that she has a daughter. I was like... ok... whatever... not very interested. In the meantime, the 2 women that I ever lover were all of a sudden hitting on me.
Fast fw to October... we spend a few hours in a night, just talking/kissing in the car.. then I told her about those two women and that I don't think that it will lead to something serious with them. She told me about a friend of her.. friend with benefits that was married and doing her almost every night. She said she knows she doesn't have a future with him, but its been going on like that for them for 3 years.. From then on things for us started to get serious. We started to care for each other more. We would talk on whatsapp all day, sometimes speak on the phone for hours at night, after her FWB had left 🙂 I didn't mind that then.
We realised that things are getting serious and because I wanted to give it a shot with one of the other ladies (an old friend, who was my first love), we decided to stop talking. It lasted a few hours. Then we tried again. Same result. We just couldn't not speak to each other.
After my divorce (middle of October), we had amazing sex one night. After that she told me that she cannot have sex anymore with her FWB. And I have told my old friend that I cannot continue, that I'm not ready for a relationship. Then the entire month of November was an amazing roller coaster with my Aqua. We were like almost in a relationship, except the sex part 😢 But when we felt that things get serious she would back off a bit, just for a few hours, or a couple of days and would come back. I told her I love her, she gave a me hint that she loves me, didn't said it out loud. She wouldn't speak much about her FWB, I wouldn't speak much about those two women. Step by step she conquered my world and by the end of the month I would end up things for good with both of the others (btw, with the others there was no sex, just emotional things). My Aqua told me things that rocked my world, she has a way with words: we have all the ingredients for a +50yrs relationship, that Im perfect for her, that she misses me the second I leave, that Im the first person that she is considering for a relationship during the last 5 years after her divorce etc etc.. We slept together a month ago, no real sex, because 'she was not 100% ready' (but we had sex once in October)... Her daughter loves me, her best friend likes me and hates her FWB 🙂) Even her FWB said that she looks in love and she told him thats true.
And now came December with that stupid trip I took with my old friend. And looks like from then on the Aqua started to back off. Im not sure if its that, or its just a coincidence. And things now are veeeery different from what they were. We chat everyday, but she is in a different emotional place. I think she's started seeing her FWB again (they are friends anyway, but the sex part I think its on again). She says she doesn't want a relationship, at least not now, that she feels ok to be alone. I know that its not true, because a couple of months ago she wanted to get back with her ex husband just to not be alone...
I have told her twice in the past week how I feel for her, that she is the one, that I want to take things slowly and build our moments together. She knows exactly how I feel for her, she told me that.
If she knows that, whats with the change?? She got scared? She hates me for going in that trip (she never mentioned something like that, just that I didn't called her, when she made it very very clear that she doesn't want to talk during those days, even though I tried once)? She said she doesn't know whats with her, that she was never like this, that she has no feelings now, its just her and her daughter. But she does want to speak with me, we chat a bit everyday, even though I told her I will let her alone, to figure out her feelings for me. She didn't reply to that, but we still talk, and she initiates.
Im fcking confused about all this, especially now that her FWB is back.... or at least I think he is.
Sorry for the long post, must be the longest here on dxp 🙂)) I got really angry because of the FWB part and her emotional distance.
Posted by BAVPosted by LondonelixerWell, there was no date. We chatted a bit in the evening (WhatsApp) and asked her about that cake... she didn't answer and changed the subject. At some point she said she misses London and I told her lets go there for your birthday (1/31). She said she will go somewhere for her birthday, alone! Because she has closed herself a lot, doesn't know why. I told her I think I know why you did this - her answer: "I don't think you know, even I don't know why, but its like never before, I have no feelings, not one, Im immune, its just me and my daughter now. Big walls around me..."
To me that would point to a good sign. Just keep it light and easy going!
I hope it goes well 2moro for you ?
I texted her that I know she will come back at some point. I will let her be for now. To realise what are her feelings for me. I know what my feelings for her are.
Weird people! 🙂)))click to expand
I see what she means, we sometimes close ourselves so much to avoid getting hurt or getting disappointed. Is not hard to believe in someone but to believe in our feelings, sometimes we just get excited to know that someone cares about us, but we are not sure if they really do, or if they just "blindly" love us without knowing us 100%
Your divorce is still recent and she might feel that you would have to experience more so that when you choose her, you are sure she's the one.
Don't tell her that you're sure she will go back, because that to me would be a "Don't go back, he's expecting you to"
it's good that you give her time and let her be for now, you should have said that you will be there for her if she needs anything at any point.
This is getting very confusing 🙂))) very mixed feelings from her side..
We met accidentally in the parking lot this morning, I gave her a little something for her daughter. We went up together in the elevator and kissed 🙂)) next she tells me that I was so adorable this morning and I was to be made love with... and that I should come by her office later. Except that she left before telling me that 🙂)))
And then almost nothing, except that she tells me that her daughter and mother love my little present.
Its going to be incredible hard to pin her down, next to impossible!!!
We met accidentally in the parking lot this morning, I gave her a little something for her daughter. We went up together in the elevator and kissed 🙂)) next she tells me that I was so adorable this morning and I was to be made love with... and that I should come by her office later. Except that she left before telling me that 🙂)))
And then almost nothing, except that she tells me that her daughter and mother love my little present.
Its going to be incredible hard to pin her down, next to impossible!!!
Posted by AmethysstDo you think she's doing that or just some time off? She's giving me hints that there is something there...Posted by Sarah_Smile34Emotionally detaching yourself is one of the most painful yet relieving decisions an aqua can make..
She is emotionally detaching herself from you because she no longer trust you.
?click to expand
"Maybe you are right. This is the second time that I kinda pushed her away, just to get a reaction from her. And it works.. she is there, she contacts me... "
Taurus Taurus Taurus and the need to control and manipulate the situation for your comfort/advantage. I'm not sure how these type of actions can ever be trusted.
Taurus Taurus Taurus and the need to control and manipulate the situation for your comfort/advantage. I'm not sure how these type of actions can ever be trusted.
@Bav
Hope you had a great holiday! Well, as far as my Taurus and I, I'm confused. So he has been really cautious with me and kinda of distant but I know I deserved it because I hurt his feelings. I'm shocked he is still even speaking to me. Thursday I spent the night in his house. Friday after work we were both tired I went home took a nap till 12 midnight and didn't realize he was calling me so when I woke up called him he wanted me to go to his house his family was there. I was shocked because I wanted to meet his family awhile ago and considering we been rocky for him to do that shocked me. I had a great time! Only thing is we didn't spend X-mas together his son came to visit so I gave him space. Sunday comes around no word until 1 in the morning with a call to fight with me about a pic I posted on IG. Smh, he confuses the hell outta me!! Then yesterday we speak about everything he seemed more relaxed. The thing is I don't know why things just don't run smooth. I'm so in love with him and it always seems so combative. When he's mad he sulks in negativity and that weighs heavy on me and then gets me down. So that answers your question on us. lol
For you, you both guarded and someone has to give alittle. NOTHING is impossible. I noticed Taurus are not vey verbal were Aquarius we crave verbal. When she gave you the green light to kiss her, while you was kissing her you should've told her in her ear I miss your kisses and kept kissing. Show her you about her but give her something to miss. 😉
Hope you had a great holiday! Well, as far as my Taurus and I, I'm confused. So he has been really cautious with me and kinda of distant but I know I deserved it because I hurt his feelings. I'm shocked he is still even speaking to me. Thursday I spent the night in his house. Friday after work we were both tired I went home took a nap till 12 midnight and didn't realize he was calling me so when I woke up called him he wanted me to go to his house his family was there. I was shocked because I wanted to meet his family awhile ago and considering we been rocky for him to do that shocked me. I had a great time! Only thing is we didn't spend X-mas together his son came to visit so I gave him space. Sunday comes around no word until 1 in the morning with a call to fight with me about a pic I posted on IG. Smh, he confuses the hell outta me!! Then yesterday we speak about everything he seemed more relaxed. The thing is I don't know why things just don't run smooth. I'm so in love with him and it always seems so combative. When he's mad he sulks in negativity and that weighs heavy on me and then gets me down. So that answers your question on us. lol
For you, you both guarded and someone has to give alittle. NOTHING is impossible. I noticed Taurus are not vey verbal were Aquarius we crave verbal. When she gave you the green light to kiss her, while you was kissing her you should've told her in her ear I miss your kisses and kept kissing. Show her you about her but give her something to miss. 😉
@BAV
Oh man!!!! I just read your trip thing. I know why she didn't want you to reach out. She didn't want to hear about you have a good time with some other chick! I mean I know me I would back off. You probably have no idea if she was able to sleep she probably had a thousand thoughts of you and that other chick even if she said she can't commit. You gave her a reason to have doubt in you. You sent her mix signals so now intern she's confused. You open Pandora box by taking a trip with someone you had sexual encounters with so how does she know it won't happen again? Get it? If she didn't reject your kiss she still cares TRUST ME! When we don't want anything we won't even acknowledge your existence. Day by day
Oh man!!!! I just read your trip thing. I know why she didn't want you to reach out. She didn't want to hear about you have a good time with some other chick! I mean I know me I would back off. You probably have no idea if she was able to sleep she probably had a thousand thoughts of you and that other chick even if she said she can't commit. You gave her a reason to have doubt in you. You sent her mix signals so now intern she's confused. You open Pandora box by taking a trip with someone you had sexual encounters with so how does she know it won't happen again? Get it? If she didn't reject your kiss she still cares TRUST ME! When we don't want anything we won't even acknowledge your existence. Day by day
I'm an aqua girl. If I were in her position I would be livid you were hanging out with a girl you used to be involved with recently. It would babe a total turnoff and I would go cold on you too...
*be a total
@ Bav
LOL, wow reading you paragraph it sounds like my situation! You Taurus live to much in your head and assume the most and the only reason you do is because you know what your capable of doing. (hence you thinking she with the fwb again) because you know you would do that. Ask her straight up
LOL, wow reading you paragraph it sounds like my situation! You Taurus live to much in your head and assume the most and the only reason you do is because you know what your capable of doing. (hence you thinking she with the fwb again) because you know you would do that. Ask her straight up
Posted by Sarah_Smile34Yep. I agree. Been there. Have a hard time expressing my own feelings to the one I'm dating because of fear of rejection. It's easier to just walk away when they start acting shady.Posted by AmethysstPeople have no idea how painful that process is. We hate having to do it but the pain of keeping on is worse on us.Posted by Sarah_Smile34Emotionally detaching yourself is one of the most painful yet relieving decisions an aqua can make..
She is emotionally detaching herself from you because she no longer trust you.
?
click to expand
Why do we do that? I feel like we self sabotage ourselves by just walking away. It's the same shit just with a different face. @Sarah_Smile34
Posted by Sarah_Smile34I kind of agree with this. I find earth sign men do almost better with matches that keep them interested or on their toes. They seem to actually crave more mental stimulation than anything and an aqua will always keep you guessing. They need to guess, wonder, and possibly even worry about things or they will stray. Like there need to be some other type of stimulation beyond warmth, and comfort IMO.Posted by JohnTheBaptist100
Ok, just for the record....
Those of you in an aqua / taurus relationship or trying for one... Sorry to disappoint but the bottom line is that this pairing will NOT work long term and Taurus always looks for long term if possible..
These two Signs are tooooooooo different regardless of the other placements. The sun is the ego and it is important. Short term or a fling... Long term it will not work... So save yourselves some time, pain and anguish by cutting the cord now.
These two signs are an ugly mix.. Aqua can never give the warmth that a taurus eventually craves.
I disagree especially for a female Aqua and male Taurus. This can be a great pairing because we're just enough eccentricity to keep him interested and very loving and warm once ee feel the love we're giving is being returned. It could be my earth rising and venus that play a role in this but the first love of my life is a Taurus and I would move heaven and earth for him.click to expand
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Only you can make the decision. She's told you how she feels right now, whether you feel she's being honest or hiding her feelings is irrelevant, you just have to give her the space. But just be there also. Things I mentioned earlier.
Maybe she is closing off at the moment because she does feel a lot for you, the continued theme is that those they care for receive less attention... again this is my experience and the advice I've received.