Are they embarrased to say thank you?

So I've noticed that all the while aquariuses in my life are humble and humanitarian creatures, they always act weird when it comes to gifts.

The female aquarians I know tend to get uncomfortable in the sense that they feel like they don't deserve the gift.

While the Male aquarians seem to either be really great at being appreciative or get really weird about it and just don't say anything, not even a thank you. They don't even react.

Any insight as to why?

FYI, I bought three gifts for 3 different aquarians. 1 female and two male. I haven't seen the other aquarian male in years so ther'es no point in gifting that person LOL.

But this is what I think will happen.

- Aquarius female -- will say its too expensive or too nice and will get weird about it

- Aquarian male #1 -- will just accept it. Say nothing, and probably won't even open it and stick it in the trunk. Also recieved a gift from a male friend and opened it but never said thank you to that other person, just opened it and then stuck it in the trunk.

- aquarian male #2 -- will contact me right away be overly grateful. be excited about it, may give me a hug next time they see me.


So aside from the #2, the other two sometimes get to me in a way where its like "what's the point" but that's the emotional side of me wanting validation or a reaction. How do you guys handle this?

what the hell? 😛

i never minded when my relatives gave me gifts, and they never minded if i gave them gifts.

what's all this excuse to look into HOW expensive it is or how cheap?

you have to consider the "source", if the family is from a very poor background and they barely managed and they gave you a gift, they made from hand (which is really worth alot imo) and /or they give you gifts that you know and can see is cheap, you should be THANKFUL. i mean you have to look at their background/situation.

if they are super wealthy and super rich and you know they just can drop $ $ $ 10 grand on a pocket watch one day and give you a super cheap gift worth $ 10 bucks, then you wonder...hmm well i guess that is how it is. *shrug*

but if they are from a POOR background, then you are thankful for whatever they give.

always consider their background.

I normally say thank you for almost everything (which I personally like others to do to me of course when I help them 😛) and it drives one friend of mine crazy. I wonder why!

I don't know what it is but it feels like whenever I gave them gifts (any of them) I tend to get weird reactions like they don't care or don't want it or they can't handle it.

It kind of ruins the joy of giving people gifts to show our appreciation.

END RESULT:

I gave Aqua Male #2 the gift in my santa suit (As a joke) and he was totally appreciative, gave me a hug like I predicted and what was even fantastic was i got the right gift...I guess correctly. It was a dodgers thermos and a star wars book he can read to his kids. The book I got was the star wars book he was missing (guess its a book that's part of a series).

I gave Aqua Male #1 the gift also in my santa suit and I had to ask him to open it in front of me. Not sure why he tends to not want to open gifts right away. But I made him open it in front of me becuase if I didn't...he'd never say anything about it. The gift was a book that showed the history of his favorite baseball team. I he liked it but it felt like I had to ask him if he liked it because he wasn't saying anything as he was looking at it.

Generally being me and having amazing friends is a good enough reward for me. Gifts are like... totally weird for me. Also it makes me think that I should get you back that somehow in the back of your head you'd remember this day as the day you gave me a gift and I'd have to return it as a gesture in some way or form. Even when you say "oh no it doesn't matter" but it always matters. always!

/endrant

I also don't get compliments. Especially on my appearance. It's like thank you... right... is there something on my face? Why are you staring so intently on my face.

Jokes aside, no I handle both quite well.

I haven't given aqua female (sister) the gift yet of course...it's not Christmas Yet.

@ aquanoz we aren't giving you gifts so you are forced to give one back.

We are giving you gifts to show you we care. When you don't even seem happy or even at least appreciative. It kinda sucks, becuase even if poeple gave me shitty gifts or even something as simple as candy for xmas...I still like it anyway, its becuase they thought of me.

Do you aquas not care if people think OF you.

hey hey you know I can't help but feel that way some time it's just how I'm wired plus I do accept gifts quite well you are forgetting I'm majority water. When I get a shit present my face shows it hahaha. When I get a great present I burst out in joy and hug shit.

Also that last sentence. No. Honestly I don't care what people think of me. If people think I owe it to them to show reciprocation because it was their idea in the first place, tough luck. A present is out the kindness of their heart I can appreciate that, but how I react is me and has nothing to do with the present giver. If they feel the need to be offended when I don't show it outwardly, it's on them.

Plus all that water and a libra rising.

You're talking to the master of social etiquette. What I feel is entirely different to how I would act. So there's something to think on. Are gift receivers always genuinely grateful.

I always say thank you when receiving gifts but I will admit that I feel a bit awkward about it at times. I think it's mostly because I'm really picky when it comes to gifts... I mean I appreciate them, and obviously it's the thought that counts, but I feel like some people don't really put that much thought into it which is kind of insulting in a way. I always put a lot of thought into my gifts for friends and family, so I definitely expect the same in return. But I'm mostly referring to friends and acquaintances at holiday or graduation parties, events like that. I will say thank you, nonetheless, but I can't guarantee that I won't be awkward about it! I think it's just the show of emotions... Aquarians are very detached. I feel overly animated and insincere when thanking someone for a gift even though I am genuinely thankful.

Posted by Sammy20
Spending time with you (if we're really close) is a better gift.

I definitely agree. Great memories with someone you care about are much more valuable than some fancy gift.

@aquaaaaaaaa

I guess I still don't get aquas. I mean the detachment really confuses me. I mean I put thoughts into my gifts, and I think really hard (for weeks/months) of what they would like. If/when I give it to them, and they say thank you and that's it. No reaction, nothing. Maybe because I'm water, I expect some sort of something, not necessarily them having to "like" it, but a smile at least to show they appreciate the fact that I give a crap.

Another thing that I really don't get is for them to show they care is alot, at least I think. That's why I appreciate gifts from aquas more than anything becuase of the non-sentimentality pieces of them. But then they always end up doing stuff to kinda ruin the joy.


I get Actions = show they care. But then the shit they say, ruins it or contradicts it.

In general, you have to remember that we really don't like showing emotions. Like mushy gushy, sappy emotions. Your friend (Aqua #1) is male, so that explains his display of indifference. I will admit that's kind of weird how he won't say anything about it unless you're right in front of him or you happen to mention it. It is rude. I've found that I tend not to dwell on the thought of gifts. Once I receive them, I smile, say thank you, hug, etc (don't forget to insert the awkwardness in this part), and then I just kind of move on. I do this even if I absolutely love the gift and I'm beyond grateful.

Material things really don't sustain their importance with me. It's like when you reallyyyy want a pair of nice, expensive shoes and you have to save up for weeks or even months to have enough money to buy them. Once you've gotten them, worn them a few times, gotten a few compliments, they're really just like any old pair of shoes that you have sitting in your closet. It's the same concept with receiving gifts, but because gifts are either 1. a hit or miss, or 2. unexpected, the excitement doesn't last as long. I wasn't waiting for the gift nor was I asking for it. Therefore, its value decreases much more quickly. I don't treat it like a piece of crap--I'll take care of it and always remember who gave it to me--but really, at the end of the day, it's just an object.

That's why Aquarians (okay, maybe just me) hold quality time with loved ones above store bought gifts or, sometimes, even cheesy, sentimental hand-made gifts. We really value being with our friends and family and being able to be ourselves when we're around them. Like I really cannot stress how valuable great memories are to me! You always have them with you, they last forever, and nothing can ruin them.

Wow, that got unexpectedly sappy... :'D

Posted by IAmMystified
@aquaaaaaaaa

I guess I still don't get aquas. I mean the detachment really confuses me. I mean I put thoughts into my gifts, and I think really hard (for weeks/months) of what they would like. If/when I give it to them, and they say thank you and that's it. No reaction, nothing. Maybe because I'm water, I expect some sort of something, not necessarily them having to "like" it, but a smile at least to show they appreciate the fact that I give a crap.

Another thing that I really don't get is for them to show they care is alot, at least I think. That's why I appreciate gifts from aquas more than anything becuase of the non-sentimentality pieces of them. But then they always end up doing stuff to kinda ruin the joy.

I get Actions = show they care. But then the shit they say, ruins it or contradicts it.

Hahaha I totally see myself in your descriptions. I do have enough self awareness to notice that I can act like that and realize how strange and frustrating it must be to other people. You're right--an Aquarius giving you a gift (as long as it's not expected of them socially, like a house-warming gift or gift for the hostess) is a huge display of affection. I give gifts to my best friends because I love them and appreciate them, and showing my affection makes up for my inability to articulate how I feel. Like I genuinely have a hard time telling people, especially in person, how much they mean to me without being silly about it, which ruins the moment.

My affection for other people also comes at strange times and the feelings are so strong that I need to act on them. That's why I tend to ruin my better moments because my feelings for people are never consistent! For months I can feel indifferent towards a friend and then of the sudden I'm whipping up a batch of cookies for her to show how much I love her. Strange, I know. Try to not take it too personally... we do it with everyone, even those we really love.

I get the inconsistency part. I notice. What I don't understand is, I am entirely grateful these aqua males gave me gifts.

Aqua #1 had to ask my best friend what to get, becuase he wasn't sure especially when he ASSUMED I didn't like last years gift...when I loved the baby xmas tree he gave me. I hugged him and thanked him for the tree and how it was sweet. As bad as I am with plants, that tree was important to me. I paid more attention to that tree than I have with any plant I ever have. But for a an airy placmenet aqua to go out of his way to want to give me something is fantastic and I love the gift. He gave me an ugly sweater themed cookie kit and he gave me a gift card with a heavy $ $ balance on it. When I had decided to leave, I made sure I said goodbye to him last and I told him to give me a hug 😄 and I thanked him for the gifts and that I will definitely bake it. We talked a little and then I went home. But I left kinda bummed cause I wish I didn't hear him invite mutual friends to hang out over the holidays if they had time. It wasn't as if he was secluding people out cause he wasn't speaking low or anything. I'm sure he was well aware I could hear him or anyone could have.

Aqua #2 ended up giving me a bath set (lavender scented). He actually asked me if I liked it, I told him I loved it. Lavendar = relaxation. He apologize for forgetting to put his name on it. He said that his wife gave him a hint as to what women liked so I reassured him that women love lavender.

Aqua #2 is so much easier to be around. He knows how to properly react, thank, inquire, and ask. Which is what eveyrone else most people are around do. But not aqua #1. I always end up worrying if he'll be happy with what i give him, or he'll do and say all the right things and then screw it up like 10 minutes later. So I never know lol.

it just kills the mood to not even get a smile or some indication that they appreciate it.

I used to be really weird about getting gifts when I was a kid @ Christmas. It was because I was expected to be super excited and show my excitement as I was opening gifts, it ruined it for me.

I'm OK with gifts now, but I'd rather be the gift giver.
My close friend (cancer sun, scorp moon) is ALWAYS giving me stuff or buying me stuff or offering to buy me stuff. It's okay with me, but I always try to return the favor, even if she won't let me. I feel like she will resent me one day because she gave me all this expensive stuff, lol.

Posted by augustmoon
I used to be really weird about getting gifts when I was a kid @ Christmas. It was because I was expected to be super excited and show my excitement as I was opening gifts, it ruined it for me.

I'm OK with gifts now, but I'd rather be the gift giver.
My close friend (cancer sun, scorp moon) is ALWAYS giving me stuff or buying me stuff or offering to buy me stuff. It's okay with me, but I always try to return the favor, even if she won't let me. I feel like she will resent me one day because she gave me all this expensive stuff, lol.

I can understand gifts being a weird moment for aquas cause there's an emotional expectation tied to it, but i guess if you guys don't even let loose a smile, how do the rest of us know what you think/feel about it.

Posted by IAmMystified
it just kills the mood to not even get a smile or some indication that they appreciate it.

Bottomline: it's not about and your reaction to their reaction.

When I was younger, I used to get a little hurt to not see a reaction. Would lead to me second guessing myself. Maybe I bought a crap present and they hate it? But then I tell myself as long as I give because I want to, the gesture itself mean a lot.

Used to suck at receiving too. I would be happy and stuff but I'd always say "Oh you bought me something? You shouldn't have".

One day a friend told me how demeaning that "You shouldn't have" line sound to him. He went "Well it just makes me feel I am an idiot. I want to be bothered with getting a gift for you because I care for you"

So now I smile and say "Thank you!" no matter what.

Same with compliments..we have knee jerk reactions to compliments as well at times. We question the intent etc.

People are just people. Let's not underestimate how clueless we are most of the time. Leaving room for laughs and understanding.

Okay...the first thing that comes to my mind when receiving a gift is.."oh no..now i will have to reciprocate" ...its the feeling of pressure to do something that is not coming naturally but out of the necessity of reciprocation...and y'all know well aquas HATE doing anything until they really feel like.. so that's how i feel about gifts...though i do appreciate it and feel happy and say thank you..but yes there is a certain awkwardness in receiving it.

Also, when i give gifts...i put in a lot of thought and energy into deciding and selecting it...I don't just pick and give anything randomly just for the sake of giving something...HENCE, the "pressure" about "there is a task to be done" 😛

Posted by Janaqua
Okay...the first thing that comes to my mind when receiving a gift is.."oh no..now i will have to reciprocate" ...its the feeling of pressure to do something that is not coming naturally but out of the necessity of reciprocation...and y'all know well aquas HATE doing anything until they really feel like.. so that's how i feel about gifts...though i do appreciate it and feel happy and say thank you..but yes there is a certain awkwardness in receiving it.

You are not alone. After I received a gift from a friend, I was obliged to gift something in return and I wasn't personally happy doing it. But, I did and I didn't feel happy doing it. 😢

Hey febaqua...janaqua here! 😛 🙂

Eh I don't know, everyone else I know (other signs) when its a gift exchange I can tell how happy they are to have recieved it or at least appreciative.

ironicaly Aqua male #2 when I ran into him several days after xmas, he was like guess what guess what I gotta show you something! So I walked with him to his car and he pulled out the Dodgers thermos I gave him and he went on and on about how he loved it, how it holds alot of coffee how he likes the material its made of and then he said he forgot to give me the 2nd half of my gift and he apologized for it being late.


Totally different than Aqua male #1 who just said thanks in a monotone sorta way.

So gift giving is alot funner for me because #2 at least shows appreciation, with #1 its like wtf is your problem

LOL.

Posted by IAmMystified
Eh I don't know, everyone else I know (other signs) when its a gift exchange I can tell how happy they are to have recieved it or at least appreciative.

ironicaly Aqua male #2 when I ran into him several days after xmas, he was like guess what guess what I gotta show you something! So I walked with him to his car and he pulled out the Dodgers thermos I gave him and he went on and on about how he loved it, how it holds alot of coffee how he likes the material its made of and then he said he forgot to give me the 2nd half of my gift and he apologized for it being late.


Totally different than Aqua male #1 who just said thanks in a monotone sorta way.

So gift giving is alot funner for me because #2 at least shows appreciation, with #1 its like wtf is your problem

LOL.

LMAO ... I can imagine if i were in your place..i'd be like "what? u not happy receiving it..or your don't like it?" Maybe, you could do that so you can understand him better or diff aquas better ...and i can say he would like you asking that..if i were him...i'd start smiling at that..🙂

@jana the funny thing about Aqua #1 is, he thought I didn't like December 2013's gift. He told a friend of mine that he noticed how I didn't like it.

I'm thinking where the fakk did he assume that? I loved his gift, it was unique and sweet...I'm not sure what he was thinking.

Was it my facial expression? Was it becuase I wasn't bouncing off the walls or screaming out of joy.

Not sure, and he didn't even tell me that anyway.

His birthday is coming up in the beginning of February and although he's hard to buy for, I at least will put a lot of thought into the gift like I normally would for someone.

I do know that even though he has very little interests, he does find things that are uniquely flavored or food places with unique foods interest him. Or american foods that look different in other countries i.e oreos are different in asian countries.

So I was thinking of giving him those beverage buckets with his favorite sports teams logo on it, full of weird flavored bottles of soda surrounded by different packages of weird and odd candies i.e. sizzling bacon flavored candy, high five me pack of gum etc.

Do you think he'd like it?