Aries woman with virgo man

I've been dating a virgo man for 8 months and the beginning was great we both just got out of a long term relationship and opened up to each other.. And now he's been soo distant, I'm not sure why. He puts his friends first always and it comes off like he's afraid to get too close because he has severe trust issues.. I asked him to accompany to a family gathering and it was so clear that he didn't want to go.. I stopped speaking to him after that day and it's been 4 days since I've heard from which never happens I really refuse to contact him first... But I'm afraid it may be over, which is painful Bc I invested my time and energy... Any advice?

Don't let your ego get in the way. Ask him straight up what's wrong. If he's being selfish or cold then step back.

You are so right but I really get tired of putting so much effort in.. I'm sure I've asked what's wrong before and I'm sure he said "nothing baby just tired".. I'm honestly waiting for him to contact me if he really cares _—

Posted by AriesJo2douce
I've been dating a virgo man for 8 months and the beginning was great we both just got out of a long term relationship and opened up to each other.. And now he's been soo distant, I'm not sure why. He puts his friends first always and it comes off like he's afraid to get too close because he has severe trust issues.. I asked him to accompany to a family gathering and it was so clear that he didn't want to go.. I stopped speaking to him after that day and it's been 4 days since I've heard from which never happens I really refuse to contact him first... But I'm afraid it may be over, which is painful Bc I invested my time and energy... Any advice?

Have you done or said anything to make him second guess you?

From the Virgos I know men mainly, they can turn off or start questioning the relationship if in their minds you have given them a reason to.

Or...he could possibly be distant because hes out saving the world. Virgo's that I know do tend to have a duty of care to others, the ones I know seem to check out of peoples lives to handle whatever is on their superman lists.

Yea I have, I guess working out with my male friend that likes me and showing him text messages that other guys send me... Hmmmm could it be the reason he didn't want to go to a family gathering with me and hasn't texted me in days knowing he has hurt my feelings?

Aries babe! Fear not if he cares or not. He should be chasing you! Or at least, that's what Virgo does when he's in love. He wants you there 100% of the time, sharing everything with you and giving you the world. If he's not talking to you, he's second guessing you, talking to someone else, or too busy with his friends to care about you. Although it hurts now, it will hurt even more if you stay and let him take you for granted. I love me Aries and I always see this happen again and again where Virgo mistreats Aries and their love, generosity, feelings and leaves an Aries feeling unappreciated. I would suggest finding a beautiful sexy and fierce Leo, or a adventurous Sag. Libra is your balancing sign, and works better too! Good luck Aries babe~

Posted by AriesJo2douce
Yea I have, I guess working out with my male friend that likes me and showing him text messages that other guys send me... Hmmmm could it be the reason he didn't want to go to a family gathering with me and hasn't texted me in days knowing he has hurt my feelings?

Yep...that may have did it...Even though you are just friends with these other guys, your guy doesn't see it that way. No man wants to feel like he's in competition for your attention. Also, is this something that most Aries male and female do? The reason I ask is I had a friend that used to do the exact same thing and he lost out on a lot of good women because he either craved attention or just got a kick out of trying to make the other girls jealous..I'm just asking. Maybe you thought by showing him the texts that at least you're being open and honest, but being a Virgo, I'm sure he see's that as a way of you letting him know that you have other interest if things don't work out between you two?

Posted by AriesJo2douce
Yea I have, I guess working out with my male friend that likes me and showing him text messages that other guys send me... Hmmmm could it be the reason he didn't want to go to a family gathering with me and hasn't texted me in days knowing he has hurt my feelings?

Ouch yeah I could see this being an issue, did you show him those messages to make him jealous or anything? He could see that as mind games, I do know that they are quite insecure. They just appear well put together.

They don't like emotional matters of the heart, he's prob analysing the pros and cons right now.

Be careful what you do next they tend to test their potentials to see if your worth it, they're quiet picky (I don't even know why 90% that iv known are serial cheaters).

I did it to be honest... But I guess I wasn't the smartest idea.. After I promised I wouldn't hang out with my friend.. I honestly felt like he wasn't showing me enough attention so I hung out with my male friend.. The last text I sent him was telling him how my friend would never disappoint me and his response was "don't compare me to your guy friends that wants to sleep with you"

I honestly don't want to contact him because to me it will come off desperate

Posted by AriesJo2douce
I did it to be honest... But I guess I wasn't the smartest idea.. After I promised I wouldn't hang out with my friend.. I honestly felt like he wasn't showing me enough attention so I hung out with my male friend.. The last text I sent him was telling him how my friend would never disappoint me and his response was "don't compare me to your guy friends that wants to sleep with you"

My god girl, you are HARSH!! This thread and all your posts here reek of ME ME ME

You say you did it to be honest, then you say you did it coz you were getting no attention (GAMES) then you rub his nose in it with that text.

You think he's going to chase after you— Delusional !!!

You want a relationship? Grow up

@ariesgirl74 stop making me laugh lol I honestly didn't even realize I was hurting my chances

@ariesgirl74 I must admit you are right I can't even argue thanks for pointing that out.

Posted by AriesJo2douce
but I really get tired of putting so much effort in..

...then don't! You don't have to put so much effort in.

I know Aries like to be "in charge" but you can choose NOT to.

Posted by AriesJo2douce
I did it to be honest... But I guess I wasn't the smartest idea.. After I promised I wouldn't hang out with my friend.. I honestly felt like he wasn't showing me enough attention so I hung out with my male friend.. The last text I sent him was telling him how my friend would never disappoint me and his response was "don't compare me to your guy friends that wants to sleep with you"

Oh gosh youv dug yourself into a hole and I dont know how your going to get yourself out of it.

Its just coming off like your insulting his intelligence by saying these guys that like you as a friend but then spending more time with them, you comparing the two is making it seem like your entertaining the attention when your loyalty is with him.

Even if you don't like these guys back out of respect to him don't rub it in his face, youv already made it seem like you don't need him, worst seed to plant into a Virgo.

Good luck with this lol.

Ohhh gosh I really didn't know I was digging this hole.. And he has trust issues _??__??_

Thanks for being honest guys

I know you may hate the thought of this.... Maybe an apology to him??

Lol

Lol yea, so put aside that he chooses his boys over me and not joining me at a family gathering that he received a personal invitation to.. There has to be some boundaries here no? He hasn't told me he's made about any text so the apology may seem random

Posted by AriesJo2douce
The last text I sent him was telling him how my friend would never disappoint me and his response was "don't compare me to your guy friends that wants to sleep with you"

You've missed it .. He IS mad about the text.
I'm saying apologise for this.

Also maybe the guy is shy and doesn't want to be exposed to what he might think is a mass family gathering. You don't know because you didn't ASK him why? You told us you decided to give him the silent treatment lol why because he didn't do as he was told? Lol!

You are not seriously jealous of his friends are you? You're stronger than that surely??

Posted by AriesGirl74
I know you may hate the thought of this.... Maybe an apology to him??

Lol

Lol I second this apologise and explain yourself, don't get soppy or emotional, just get to the point then back off a little to give him some space that way the balls in his court.

I had mostly male friends. He told me no...they want to sleep with me.

I told him then he's going to have to share his friends. He said okay.

Communication

Compromise

He will trust me again thanks..... However thank you aniesha, and ariesgurl you've mad valid points that I didn't notice... So the reason he was speaking to me is because he heard I was "sitting on a guys lap" from his female "friend"... Once I heard that(which she denied saying) I lost it.. I had to call her and check that, cool you like him but please don't make stories up.. Act first he believed her but once clarified he realized she was lying on me_??__??_... But it took him 4 days to talk to me about it. I will stop sending him text that other ppl send me.. Thanks guys.. BUT the fact that he didn't even call me after hearing a rumor about me makes me view him differently_??'

ok.... well I guess this is an example of how NONE of us really know the whole story - including you! lol 😉

I don't know anything about Virgo guys, but you mentioned a couple of times about his severe trust issues; so hearing what he heard - truthful or not - may have triggered those feelings subconsciously within him and made him withdraw.

If you want to give this relationship a chance it seems like he will need a LOT of reassurance from you so he can feel secure. I guess it depends if you want to make that sort of effort...

Excuse the errors _—_??

Posted by AriesJo2douce
I've been dating a virgo man for 8 months and the beginning was great we both just got out of a long term relationship and opened up to each other.. And now he's been soo distant, I'm not sure why. He puts his friends first always and it comes off like he's afraid to get too close because he has severe trust issues.. I asked him to accompany to a family gathering and it was so clear that he didn't want to go.. I stopped speaking to him after that day and it's been 4 days since I've heard from which never happens I really refuse to contact him first... But I'm afraid it may be over, which is painful Bc I invested my time and energy... Any advice?

People need to be aware that after the initial flame is lit..we have lives going on. It cannot be intense 24/7, that's the stuff of fairy tales.

Did he mention he has trust issues or did you make an assumption? Don't make assumptions with earth people, we'll tell you what the deal is of the bat. Most of the times we're just stressed out from running circles in our career and basically helping everyone around us. Times like these, a partner understands us and is comforting..doesn't complain about getting the short end of the stick.

So..8 great months and you freak out over 4 days of no contact? Calm down. This isn't a power play.

Posted by AriesJo2douce
I'm sure I've asked what's wrong before and I'm sure he said "nothing baby just tired"..

He's probably honest, you're blowing this out of proportion for no good reason.

Posted by AriesJo2douce
and showing him text messages that other guys send me...

People who do this to get their ego validated won't make it work with Virgos.

Drop the act (we see through it) or drop the Virgo.

Don't feign innocence, I know how Aries do it because they need reassurance. Be reassured in the fact that we're around, don't play us for attention. It erodes a genuine basis for what could have been a great relationship.

Great point Damnata, He is very honest

However,he told me he has trust issue due to his last relationship and is looking for someone he can trust

Posted by FireVirgo
Don't let your ego get in the way. Ask him straight up what's wrong. If he's being selfish or cold then step back.

YUP!!! that EGO will eat you alive!!!

Ask questions NEVER assume. If YOU need a break from communicating then do so. But I wouldnt drain myself. Sometimes I can doa break and not be anxious to talk again. But if I do, then I do it. Pride and ego will drive you insane. That way you can say u tried all you can.

So small up date after a week my virgo has sorta come back to just give me dry cut responses and to ignore any of my feeling.. Telling me he's not mad and he doesn't want me to give him space.. I saw him and we laughed and held hands and ended with a kiss but once I say I miss you... Ignore and jumps into another topic. Strange

Well you may as well move on from this one. He is not going to come back. This one was a big mess up. Virgo's need loyalty and perfection but most of all they like to play it safe. Your behavior is not safe for any sign.