kp24
@kp24
11 Years
Comments: 0 · Posts: 44 · Topics: 1
Ex Aries Girlfriend, advice would be appreicated:)
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Anyway Valentines day was around and we were umming and aaring to see each other as things were't good. She'd brought ADTR tickets for the evening, just for herself and was going to see them instead. But then we agreed to see each other. I got her a card, flowers and chocolates and she got me a card and t-shirt. It was a nice evening.
We went home the day after to see our family, I didn't want to go back but she wanted me too and I went back for her. We didn't speak much throughout the week. We got a lift back from my friend as the rail lines were fucked (all the winter storms we had here) and she wanted me to come for a meal with her and her family, while my mate wanted to see me with all our mates. I went to his as he'd driven us and saved us about 2 hrs by picking us up, I also didn't have a lot of money and didn't want to embarrass myself in front of her family. She was devastated as her family (about 20 or so) had their partners/boyfriends and she didn't. I feel so sorry for her having to go through that.
Anyway I went for a few beers with my mate and I got hammered. I was horrifically drunk, and I tried to kiss another girl (I didn't realise I did until my mate told me the next day) I told her a few weeks later as I was mulling everything over. She'd lent me money as I was skint at this point and that made the decision a lot harder as I knew It would break her heart. But I had to tell her. (around early March)
She said to go on a break for a while and I said no as I wasn't right. But we didn't speak apart from when I was repaying her some of the money I owed her. I felt I was over her, I was occupying myself with loads and have lots of Uni work and other things on my mind. But we were speaking again in late April. We were talking about meeting up the week we were both back home. But I said no as I had exams to revise for along with my Dissertation. I also didn't think I was ready but I didn't tell her that.
Anyway a while passes, I occasionally send her a snapchat saying I missed her when I was drunk, she would ask If I was drunk and I'd say a little and not much more was said. But May passes, In June she slept with another guy and I had been with another girl. Anyway we still talked occasionally etc. By the start of July we both come home, she's out on a night out and sends me a text asking if she could stay at mine, I was asleep so didn't reply until the morning. Anyway, I feel more ready to give us another go, she then says that sh
We went home the day after to see our family, I didn't want to go back but she wanted me too and I went back for her. We didn't speak much throughout the week. We got a lift back from my friend as the rail lines were fucked (all the winter storms we had here) and she wanted me to come for a meal with her and her family, while my mate wanted to see me with all our mates. I went to his as he'd driven us and saved us about 2 hrs by picking us up, I also didn't have a lot of money and didn't want to embarrass myself in front of her family. She was devastated as her family (about 20 or so) had their partners/boyfriends and she didn't. I feel so sorry for her having to go through that.
Anyway I went for a few beers with my mate and I got hammered. I was horrifically drunk, and I tried to kiss another girl (I didn't realise I did until my mate told me the next day) I told her a few weeks later as I was mulling everything over. She'd lent me money as I was skint at this point and that made the decision a lot harder as I knew It would break her heart. But I had to tell her. (around early March)
She said to go on a break for a while and I said no as I wasn't right. But we didn't speak apart from when I was repaying her some of the money I owed her. I felt I was over her, I was occupying myself with loads and have lots of Uni work and other things on my mind. But we were speaking again in late April. We were talking about meeting up the week we were both back home. But I said no as I had exams to revise for along with my Dissertation. I also didn't think I was ready but I didn't tell her that.
Anyway a while passes, I occasionally send her a snapchat saying I missed her when I was drunk, she would ask If I was drunk and I'd say a little and not much more was said. But May passes, In June she slept with another guy and I had been with another girl. Anyway we still talked occasionally etc. By the start of July we both come home, she's out on a night out and sends me a text asking if she could stay at mine, I was asleep so didn't reply until the morning. Anyway, I feel more ready to give us another go, she then says that sh
Anyway, I feel more ready to give us another go, she then says that she doesn't want me back any more.
I began texting her a lot more and being full on etc. She was at a festival in early/mid August and she sent me a snapchat saying she wanted a cuddle. I brought her a Necklace as a sort of apology type thing, she said not to bother, but I did because I felt I should. After this she went to a festival at the end of August and slept with guy that she'd slept with a few months before. A few weeks later I sent her a text on a night out saying I hoped she was okay, she responded saying "come see me" several times. The next day however she said she got the wrong number, before admitting she didn't but she didn't mean it.
Anyway, to the present day. I got annoyed as she kept following me and unfollowing me on twitter, I told her this was immature etc. She then said it wasn't her and twitter kept doing it. I obviously said that's bullshit etc and said it was a bad excuse and was as bad as the excuse where she told me she had the wrong number when she said she wanted to see me and she had feelings but wasn't admitting them. Anyway she blocked me on snapchat after that.
Following this, I told her I had no respect for her doing what she's doing and she's being immature and an attention seeker. An argument ensued and in short she told me she feels like she's had no time in her life without me and she needs that, she wants me to find someone better than her, she doesn't think I know what I want, and she doesn't believe when I say things will change.
I ended the conversation saying I think we need thinking time and wished her well and left it like that.
Anyway after this, She's blocked me on twitter & made her account private, blocked me on Facebook as she didn't like to see people associate with me. Snapchat blocked, whatsapp blocked. You get the picture..
I'm guessing she's done this because she needs time or she's trying to move on?
I began texting her a lot more and being full on etc. She was at a festival in early/mid August and she sent me a snapchat saying she wanted a cuddle. I brought her a Necklace as a sort of apology type thing, she said not to bother, but I did because I felt I should. After this she went to a festival at the end of August and slept with guy that she'd slept with a few months before. A few weeks later I sent her a text on a night out saying I hoped she was okay, she responded saying "come see me" several times. The next day however she said she got the wrong number, before admitting she didn't but she didn't mean it.
Anyway, to the present day. I got annoyed as she kept following me and unfollowing me on twitter, I told her this was immature etc. She then said it wasn't her and twitter kept doing it. I obviously said that's bullshit etc and said it was a bad excuse and was as bad as the excuse where she told me she had the wrong number when she said she wanted to see me and she had feelings but wasn't admitting them. Anyway she blocked me on snapchat after that.
Following this, I told her I had no respect for her doing what she's doing and she's being immature and an attention seeker. An argument ensued and in short she told me she feels like she's had no time in her life without me and she needs that, she wants me to find someone better than her, she doesn't think I know what I want, and she doesn't believe when I say things will change.
I ended the conversation saying I think we need thinking time and wished her well and left it like that.
Anyway after this, She's blocked me on twitter & made her account private, blocked me on Facebook as she didn't like to see people associate with me. Snapchat blocked, whatsapp blocked. You get the picture..
I'm guessing she's done this because she needs time or she's trying to move on?
So what would you recommend then?
She told me she's not seeing anyone or speaking to anyone.
She told me she's not seeing anyone or speaking to anyone.
Posted by tizianiPosted by kp24
So what would you recommend then?
She told me she's not seeing anyone or speaking to anyone.
There's no magic bullet for this stuff. You're talking here about things that happened 2 years ago so clearly you need some time to clear your head and resolve the past (in your own time, not with her).
She's already moved on to her own life. You're gonna have to get back to the time where you were a one shot one kill type of guy, that's probably what she was digging about you when she first met you. Somewhere along the line you turned into "can't we just talk about it?" "let me tell you all the things I don't like about you" etc.
And that's just not what people want to hear.
Get back to being a man of action. Sounds corny but it's the best I got for you.click to expand
We were on an off for two years, broke up in March this year.
I get you...
How can I demonstrate through actions though when I'm blocked on everything?
I've privated my twitter account so she cant see it as I know she looks through it.
She doesn't want to see me... Probably blocked on phone.. I did have one with her a while back and it went ok. Made her laugh a little. She told me that "You're too late, you're too fucking late and theres nothing you can do" Which made me think, man she's still got strong feelings?
Posted by tizianiPosted by kp24Posted by tizianiPosted by kp24
So what would you recommend then?
She told me she's not seeing anyone or speaking to anyone.
There's no magic bullet for this stuff. You're talking here about things that happened 2 years ago so clearly you need some time to clear your head and resolve the past (in your own time, not with her).
She's already moved on to her own life. You're gonna have to get back to the time where you were a one shot one kill type of guy, that's probably what she was digging about you when she first met you. Somewhere along the line you turned into "can't we just talk about it?" "let me tell you all the things I don't like about you" etc.
And that's just not what people want to hear.
Get back to being a man of action. Sounds corny but it's the best I got for you.
We were on an off for two years, broke up in March this year.
I get you...
How can I demonstrate through actions though when I'm blocked on everything?
I've privated my twitter account so she cant see it as I know she looks through it.
Well first thing is forget social media. It's just talk.
Action = phone calls at worst, meeting up in person at best.click to expand
She's stubborn as hell, can't do either..
Posted by tizianiPosted by kp24
She doesn't want to see me... Probably blocked on phone.. I did have one with her a while back and it went ok. Made her laugh a little. She told me that "You're too late, you're too fucking late and theres nothing you can do" Which made me think, man she's still got strong feelings?
Yeah for sure. Making her laugh is always a good start too.click to expand
Hence why she blocked me after? I've always done that well...
Problem is it's hard with not being able to call or meet up
Posted by tizianiPosted by kp24Posted by tizianiPosted by kp24Posted by tizianiPosted by kp24
So what would you recommend then?
She told me she's not seeing anyone or speaking to anyone.
There's no magic bullet for this stuff. You're talking here about things that happened 2 years ago so clearly you need some time to clear your head and resolve the past (in your own time, not with her).
She's already moved on to her own life. You're gonna have to get back to the time where you were a one shot one kill type of guy, that's probably what she was digging about you when she first met you. Somewhere along the line you turned into "can't we just talk about it?" "let me tell you all the things I don't like about you" etc.
And that's just not what people want to hear.
Get back to being a man of action. Sounds corny but it's the best I got for you.
We were on an off for two years, broke up in March this year.
I get you...
How can I demonstrate through actions though when I'm blocked on everything?
I've privated my twitter account so she cant see it as I know she looks through it.
Well first thing is forget social media. It's just talk.
Action = phone calls at worst, meeting up in person at best.
She's stubborn as hell, can't do either..
She will come around, they always do. Let her calm down. But when she does come around, just don't waste her time (and yours) with talk.
In fact personally I would avoid any sort of contact with her on social media, no matter how much she re-adds you. It's better when people have a chance to miss you, they have more reasons to make an effort to be a part of your life while you're just doing you.click to expand
Yeah I'll be more action based.. How long before she comes round? Her friends wanted her to block me on everything and think I enjoy trying to control her and worm my way into her life.. (neither are true)
Yeah, so just carry on as usual.
Posted by tiziani
Yeah man. As for how long till she comes around, who knows? But one thing's for sure, they always come around for another look. That's what a close friend told me a while back, and it's always been true.
Yeah, my best mate think's she'll reach out again. I don't think she will tbh. Interesting to see if she does.. I reckon 2-3 weeks.
Posted by tizianiPosted by kp24Posted by tiziani
Yeah man. As for how long till she comes around, who knows? But one thing's for sure, they always come around for another look. That's what a close friend told me a while back, and it's always been true.
Yeah, my best mate think's she'll reach out again. I don't think she will tbh. Interesting to see if she does.. I reckon 2-3 weeks.
Good luck. Just don't WAIT for it. Don't spend those 2-3 waiting.
Keep your own momentum. So when she comes around she'll feel like there's something to come aboard onto.click to expand
Hopefully I'll be moving with a new job...
What sort of things should I look to say/do when she does come round?
I think you should call her.
But don't expect anything.
Everything is case by case. I called a ex and he never answered or called back. So I stopped but you may have better luck.
All you can do is you're part.
But don't expect anything.
Everything is case by case. I called a ex and he never answered or called back. So I stopped but you may have better luck.
All you can do is you're part.
Posted by kp24
She told me that "You're too late, you're too fucking late and theres nothing you can do" Which made me think, man she's still got strong feelings?
Personally, I'd never say its too late unless I meant it. But thats just me.
Posted by xtinaPosted by kp24
She told me that "You're too late, you're too fucking late and theres nothing you can do" Which made me think, man she's still got strong feelings?
Personally, I'd never say its too late unless I meant it. But thats just me.click to expand
This would technically be my 3rd chance, but I have tried to show I mean it. I don't think she believes anything would change
I guess you should let it go.
I think the both of you need to mature a little. It seems there's no real communication..everything is misinterpreted. Anyway, best of luck to your situation.
Posted by tiziani
Whatever comes to mind on that very day dude.
Let's say you spend your next 2-3 weeks, however long, keeping active, doing things you enjoy. It's gonna be a lot easier for you to know what to say then when she does come around. And to say it like you mean it.
"when can we meet? I'll meet you right now. I know you're pissed. I want to meet anyway."
You'll have that energy about you.
Leave all the stuff about the past out of it. And making her laugh is always solid.
Yeah I guess.. It's on my mind constantly atm.
Just concentrate on the future then?
Posted by biosynthesis
I think the both of you need to mature a little. It seems there's no real communication..everything is misinterpreted. Anyway, best of luck to your situation.
It's why time away might be a good thing tbh. Cheers.
Posted by kp24Posted by biosynthesis
I think the both of you need to mature a little. It seems there's no real communication..everything is misinterpreted. Anyway, best of luck to your situation.
It's why time away might be a good thing tbh. Cheers.click to expand
yes I agree, time away is a good option.
Posted by biosynthesisPosted by kp24Posted by biosynthesis
I think the both of you need to mature a little. It seems there's no real communication..everything is misinterpreted. Anyway, best of luck to your situation.
It's why time away might be a good thing tbh. Cheers.
yes I agree, time away is a good option.click to expand
For some reason I get the sense that she's doing it as a test, see how much I care and how far I'll go.. No idea why I think that, just a gut instinct I guess.
^ No I do not think it's a test. I think that might be your own insecurity. She seems hurt and wants time to herself. It's not like it was 100% your fault though, you both played a part.
Posted by biosynthesis
^ No I do not think it's a test. I think that might be your own insecurity. She seems hurt and wants time to herself. It's not like it was 100% your fault though, you both played a part.
Yeah I guess, I'm focusing on my career. I hear tomorrow whether I get a job or not 🙂
Posted by kp24Posted by biosynthesis
^ No I do not think it's a test. I think that might be your own insecurity. She seems hurt and wants time to herself. It's not like it was 100% your fault though, you both played a part.
Yeah I guess, I'm focusing on my career. I hear tomorrow whether I get a job or not 🙂click to expand
yeah, try to clear your head, focus on yourself..and come back to it later. Sometimes separating emotion and logic can be tricky
I have blocked on social media before coz it's about sending a message that I'm angry at you; but yes I have unblocked to be nosy too lol .. And then blocked again!!
Aries do keep trying in relationships but after trying and trying we have enough; our feelings change coz being down and frustrated in a relationship actually physically brings is down, it drains us..
I think she is done tbh, but she is also angry and needs time and space away from you. I've just baled on a Virgo guy after a week so she's done well lol
Once she calms down - which I might add could take months and months - she will contact. We have no problem initiating contact .. If that's what we want.
Aries do keep trying in relationships but after trying and trying we have enough; our feelings change coz being down and frustrated in a relationship actually physically brings is down, it drains us..
I think she is done tbh, but she is also angry and needs time and space away from you. I've just baled on a Virgo guy after a week so she's done well lol
Once she calms down - which I might add could take months and months - she will contact. We have no problem initiating contact .. If that's what we want.
Posted by AriesGirl74
I have blocked on social media before coz it's about sending a message that I'm angry at you; but yes I have unblocked to be nosy too lol .. And then blocked again!!
Aries do keep trying in relationships but after trying and trying we have enough; our feelings change coz being down and frustrated in a relationship actually physically brings is down, it drains us..
I think she is done tbh, but she is also angry and needs time and space away from you. I've just baled on a Virgo guy after a week so she's done well lol
Once she calms down - which I might add could take months and months - she will contact. We have no problem initiating contact .. If that's what we want.
She cares a lot, after 6 months pretty much she's still got strong feelings. I hope she does, maybe we both are struggling to accept it's over? I'm going to read Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus, my mum has recommended it.
I read the book and decided to write something. What do you all think?
Hey!
I hope all is well with you. I am writing this to say a few things really and I wish to take each in turn. Firstly; Thank you for everything and I mean that. We had some great highs and unfortunate lows, but I still wouldn't change our time together. I was an ass and took you for granted at times. But you??re the love of my life and I can't live without you.
I know I am late and I??ve come to realise how immature and na??ve I??ve actually been. I also respect you for trying your best even through the absolute lows when a lot of people would??ve just given up, but you know there's a nice guy who makes you happy in there and kept going. I understand you??ve given up now because you felt like I didn't care and quite frankly I don't blame you at all, It's more than understandable. You??re a strong person for doing that and all I have is respect.
I think I did get my chance with you over this summer, but I didn't demonstrate to you that I can give you what you want. You??ve shown and said you have feelings of hurt, anger, resent, loneliness etc and I just tried to offer a solution and tell you I??ve changed. When I should have shown you I??ve changed by; understanding, respecting and validating your feelings and reassuring you that it's okay. That's how I should??ve proved I??ve changed!
Like for example; when you said —your mates are right, I'm not worth it?? and I said —You are worth it!?? When I should??ve listened to why you thought you weren't worth it and then understood and respected why you thought that, but reassured you that you that you were worth it! We literally have gone round in circles all summer and that's why we no longer have communication and I completely understand why. I never wanted to hurt you.
I??ve spent the summer pouring my feelings out and buying you gifts, tried to change your feelings when that never addressed the real problem. I??ve read —Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus?? By John Gray. It's about the communication differences and issues between men and women. I highly recommend you read it, it??ll help you understand what happened with us and it will help you in your next relationship and it has certainly helped me understand a hell of a lot, and I??ll use it in my next relationship!
Anyway, cut to the chase. When things started to go bad, it wasn't because either of us cared
Hey!
I hope all is well with you. I am writing this to say a few things really and I wish to take each in turn. Firstly; Thank you for everything and I mean that. We had some great highs and unfortunate lows, but I still wouldn't change our time together. I was an ass and took you for granted at times. But you??re the love of my life and I can't live without you.
I know I am late and I??ve come to realise how immature and na??ve I??ve actually been. I also respect you for trying your best even through the absolute lows when a lot of people would??ve just given up, but you know there's a nice guy who makes you happy in there and kept going. I understand you??ve given up now because you felt like I didn't care and quite frankly I don't blame you at all, It's more than understandable. You??re a strong person for doing that and all I have is respect.
I think I did get my chance with you over this summer, but I didn't demonstrate to you that I can give you what you want. You??ve shown and said you have feelings of hurt, anger, resent, loneliness etc and I just tried to offer a solution and tell you I??ve changed. When I should have shown you I??ve changed by; understanding, respecting and validating your feelings and reassuring you that it's okay. That's how I should??ve proved I??ve changed!
Like for example; when you said —your mates are right, I'm not worth it?? and I said —You are worth it!?? When I should??ve listened to why you thought you weren't worth it and then understood and respected why you thought that, but reassured you that you that you were worth it! We literally have gone round in circles all summer and that's why we no longer have communication and I completely understand why. I never wanted to hurt you.
I??ve spent the summer pouring my feelings out and buying you gifts, tried to change your feelings when that never addressed the real problem. I??ve read —Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus?? By John Gray. It's about the communication differences and issues between men and women. I highly recommend you read it, it??ll help you understand what happened with us and it will help you in your next relationship and it has certainly helped me understand a hell of a lot, and I??ll use it in my next relationship!
Anyway, cut to the chase. When things started to go bad, it wasn't because either of us cared
Anyway, cut to the chase. When things started to go bad, it wasn't because either of us cared about one-an-other, quite the opposite in fact. For example the money/gambling issue; which I'm sure you??ll agree was a big thing. When you read the next bit it's not having a go, just explains how I work and how you work basically.
As a man, when I have a problem I don't like to talk about it, instead I try to think of a solution and until I think of a solution I don't talk. (As a Woman and you like to be listened to, understood, reassured, cared for and respected). It's not because I don't appreciate or respect your input, it's because it's an alpha male thing, we all have to try and do things on our own and it's less manly if you have help (asking for directions for example, blokes never do it). You would then try to talk to me and try to get me to express myself when I was like that, because you cared a lot and meant to help with the best of intentions, when all I needed to be left alone for a little while (a text of —when you??re ready I'm always here??_?? would??ve been all it needed to think of a solution, once I??d done that then I could talk to you.
Whereas when you were upset, you needed love understanding and patience, not me offering solutions. Eg. The boss was an ass to me at work, my response: punch him in the face. Although it's a perfectly good thing to do as James is a twat, it's not really understanding, supportive, sympathetic of your feelings, it's giving advice and minimizing them! Like when we would have an argument, you??d get upset at lack of communication for example, I??d then say you??re making a mountain out of a molehill and being a drama queen. When all I'm doing there is invalidating your feelings which makes you 10x angrier and you??d end up crying and I??d be like wtf why is she doing that. When I should have; heard you out, then I should have reassured, sympathised, understood, respected, validated and cared for your feelings and things would??ve been a lot better, don't you think? I wish I??d read this last September.
Like when you say you??re lonely, I quickly said I??ll skype you??_ When saying literally shows I haven't listened to the problem but offered a solution. I should??ve asked what was up and if you had a bad day, then given some care, reassurance and understanding to you!
Either way, I understand why you??re really hurt. You tried your absolute best, I pulle
As a man, when I have a problem I don't like to talk about it, instead I try to think of a solution and until I think of a solution I don't talk. (As a Woman and you like to be listened to, understood, reassured, cared for and respected). It's not because I don't appreciate or respect your input, it's because it's an alpha male thing, we all have to try and do things on our own and it's less manly if you have help (asking for directions for example, blokes never do it). You would then try to talk to me and try to get me to express myself when I was like that, because you cared a lot and meant to help with the best of intentions, when all I needed to be left alone for a little while (a text of —when you??re ready I'm always here??_?? would??ve been all it needed to think of a solution, once I??d done that then I could talk to you.
Whereas when you were upset, you needed love understanding and patience, not me offering solutions. Eg. The boss was an ass to me at work, my response: punch him in the face. Although it's a perfectly good thing to do as James is a twat, it's not really understanding, supportive, sympathetic of your feelings, it's giving advice and minimizing them! Like when we would have an argument, you??d get upset at lack of communication for example, I??d then say you??re making a mountain out of a molehill and being a drama queen. When all I'm doing there is invalidating your feelings which makes you 10x angrier and you??d end up crying and I??d be like wtf why is she doing that. When I should have; heard you out, then I should have reassured, sympathised, understood, respected, validated and cared for your feelings and things would??ve been a lot better, don't you think? I wish I??d read this last September.
Like when you say you??re lonely, I quickly said I??ll skype you??_ When saying literally shows I haven't listened to the problem but offered a solution. I should??ve asked what was up and if you had a bad day, then given some care, reassurance and understanding to you!
Either way, I understand why you??re really hurt. You tried your absolute best, I pulle
Either way, I understand why you??re really hurt. You tried your absolute best, I pulled away and you tried even harder. This book shows where we both went wrong. When you were trying your best, you needed a bit of reassurance that you were doing a great job and you were special along with some TLC! And I needed a bit of space and to be told I was worth enough for you and for you to understand me going into my little space wasn't any fault of yours, it's just a guy after he's been open and emotional (e.g engagement) needs to think and analyse everything and a little space. Then you didn't give me the space and pushed me, while I didn't give you the TLC, reassurance and love you needed and things got 10x worse, don't you agree?
Posted by CuriousramPosted by AriesGirl74
I have blocked on social media before coz it's about sending a message that I'm angry at you; but yes I have unblocked to be nosy too lol .. And then blocked again!!
Aries do keep trying in relationships but after trying and trying we have enough; our feelings change coz being down and frustrated in a relationship actually physically brings is down, it drains us..
I think she is done tbh, but she is also angry and needs time and space away from you. I've just baled on a Virgo guy after a week so she's done well lol
Once she calms down - which I might add could take months and months - she will contact. We have no problem initiating contact .. If that's what we want.
LOL can i have a clap for myself? I did 3 months... most frustrating but most intense thing i had was with a virgo guy. Honestly listen to tiziani on this, nothing frustratd me more as an aries male when my virgo guy wasn't a man about anything and took action. The only time he took action was when i was gunna leave hed text me about how sorry he is ect. Tbh i don't want empty words i want you to show ME how you FEEL about me. SHOW ME lol virgo/aries oh goshhhh. Don't even get me starteeeeeed... Aries aren't very patient and when you take ten years to show any action that you cared we will already have u blocked. I went through this and blocked this virgo guy multiple times out of anger.click to expand
So what would you do to show you cared then?
It's good that you have written that as a way to help her understand why you did what you did, but if you're going to send it you must do it without expecting anything in return.
Someone I know wrote a long letter to his Aries ex convinced she would take him back - he showed me and it was truly the sweetest thing I had ever read; but she didn't take him back coz her feelings had gone after trying and trying with him. So don't have any expectations over the letter.
When Aries say they're done, they're done for sure, even if they say, or you think that they still care, it doesn't mean they have any more energy to invest in the relationship.
You say this is your first gf; use the experience, move on and try to be friends and you will find someone else.
Someone I know wrote a long letter to his Aries ex convinced she would take him back - he showed me and it was truly the sweetest thing I had ever read; but she didn't take him back coz her feelings had gone after trying and trying with him. So don't have any expectations over the letter.
When Aries say they're done, they're done for sure, even if they say, or you think that they still care, it doesn't mean they have any more energy to invest in the relationship.
You say this is your first gf; use the experience, move on and try to be friends and you will find someone else.
so I sent it to her. And then sent this:
I understand you're angry because it's only been this summer when you've seen the fight, effort and change you wanted to see months before.
And this is probably making things worse, if these even reach you. So I apologise for all my efforts and anything else I've done. All I know is I love you a lot and I don't want to lose you. But when you're ready to talk, if it takes 2 seconds, 2 weeks or 2 months, I'll be here. I won't send anything else now. I hope you're okay.
I understand you're angry because it's only been this summer when you've seen the fight, effort and change you wanted to see months before.
And this is probably making things worse, if these even reach you. So I apologise for all my efforts and anything else I've done. All I know is I love you a lot and I don't want to lose you. But when you're ready to talk, if it takes 2 seconds, 2 weeks or 2 months, I'll be here. I won't send anything else now. I hope you're okay.
Posted by CuriousramPosted by kp24
so I sent it to her. And then sent this:
I understand you're angry because it's only been this summer when you've seen the fight, effort and change you wanted to see months before.
And this is probably making things worse, if these even reach you. So I apologise for all my efforts and anything else I've done. All I know is I love you a lot and I don't want to lose you. But when you're ready to talk, if it takes 2 seconds, 2 weeks or 2 months, I'll be here. I won't send anything else now. I hope you're okay.
Sounds good.. sounds like what the virgo guy i use to see would text me. BLEHHHHHHHHH making me think of him i hate you lol. Now you shall wait patiently and see if she comes backclick to expand
Sorry bud ha!
If she's even received it, probably blocked ha.
Well she didn't receive any of the messages as my numbers blocked! She's all over twitter saying she's really in pain, should I call or will that piss her off 10fold?
Posted by kp24
Well she didn't receive any of the messages as my numbers blocked! She's all over twitter saying she's really in pain, should I call or will that piss her off 10fold?
By in pain I mean physically hurt.. Not emotionally.
Posted by CuriousramPosted by kp24Posted by kp24
Well she didn't receive any of the messages as my numbers blocked! She's all over twitter saying she's really in pain, should I call or will that piss her off 10fold?
By in pain I mean physically hurt.. Not emotionally.
Yes call her dickhead! 😛click to expand
She didn't pick up, probably asleep. 😢
call from a pay phone and if she doesn't pick up leave a voicemail saying you sent her a message and you sorry for being a uncaring d*ickhead 😉
she will read it. If there is no reply then it's over let her go. If she does reply then she cares. simples xx
she will read it. If there is no reply then it's over let her go. If she does reply then she cares. simples xx
We had a half hour phone conversation 🙂 Went ok, she had to go as she's really ill and wanted to go to bed.
Not sure what I do now tho, do I wait for her to make contact or do I give her a ring il after a few days to see if she's okay?
Posted by tizianiPosted by kp24
Not sure what I do now tho, do I wait for her to make contact or do I give her a ring il after a few days to see if she's okay?
If you're in a position where you don't know the answers to these type of questions for yourself, this girl and this relationship is no good for you. You're pretty much just waiting on her for answers that you should be able to provide for yourself.
We both said don't wait, and you're back to waiting. It's a losing situation.click to expand
Well I called her, her mate answered and said she didn't want to speak to me.
I was going to call her last night to see if she was okay but obviously couldn't due to being blocked on my mobile (and I was out so had no access to home phone.) She tweeted a pic this morning "If we don't speak all day then I know where we stand".
I have no clue any more. Women and doing the right thing at the right time have always been something I'm terrible at
Posted by tizianiPosted by kp24Posted by tizianiPosted by kp24
Not sure what I do now tho, do I wait for her to make contact or do I give her a ring il after a few days to see if she's okay?
If you're in a position where you don't know the answers to these type of questions for yourself, this girl and this relationship is no good for you. You're pretty much just waiting on her for answers that you should be able to provide for yourself.
We both said don't wait, and you're back to waiting. It's a losing situation.
Well I called her, her mate answered and said she didn't want to speak to me.
I was going to call her last night to see if she was okay but obviously couldn't due to being blocked on my mobile (and I was out so had no access to home phone.) She tweeted a pic this morning "If we don't speak all day then I know where we stand".
I have no clue any more. Women and doing the right thing at the right time have always been something I'm terrible atclick to expand
Yep, and we both said social media is fake. You can't know what's going on with someone by looking at their twitter. It may have nothing to do with you, just some other guy. She said there is no one else in her life but haven't you considered the idea she may have just reached the stage where she tells you what she feels you need to hear? Not necessarily the truth, but just what you need to hear.
I'm not going to be hard on you for the sake of it. I've written letters like the one you sent. Hell, I've written them to an Aries too. A long time ago.
But be honest with yourself of focus on yourself. Your letter was self-pitying. Why is that? You're going to want to figure out where that comes from. Instead of focusing on all the things you learnt and got right from your relationship, you're still in a place where you're focusing on all the things you got wrong and apologising for the mistakes. That approach gets people out of uni but it only gets you so far after that.
Whatever your reasons are for doing that, it's best you get to cracking on those in your own private and personal time.
You're not gonna get the girl and you're not gonn
Apologies for the hidden posts, won't let me quote anything.
@Tiziani
Neither of us follow each other or can see the others tweets on Social media. I only saw it because my friend who follows her sent it to me saying "What have you done haha?" I think this whole hot and cold thing is her gut feeling telling her she wants it back but everything else like friends etc saying other wise.
The letter which she didn't even read, was just showing hod I'd handle the situations differently. Mate there were great times!
@Tiziani
Neither of us follow each other or can see the others tweets on Social media. I only saw it because my friend who follows her sent it to me saying "What have you done haha?" I think this whole hot and cold thing is her gut feeling telling her she wants it back but everything else like friends etc saying other wise.
The letter which she didn't even read, was just showing hod I'd handle the situations differently. Mate there were great times!
Posted by tizianiPosted by kp24
Apologies for the hidden posts, won't let me quote anything.
@Tiziani
Neither of us follow each other or can see the others tweets on Social media. I only saw it because my friend who follows her sent it to me saying "What have you done haha?" I think this whole hot and cold thing is her gut feeling telling her she wants it back but everything else like friends etc saying other wise.
The letter which she didn't even read, was just showing hod I'd handle the situations differently. Mate there were great times!
Fair play. So in the end, prove that to yourself.click to expand
So basically work on myself and sack her off?
If we are unsure then we tend to go with giving people another chance coz Aries always have hope.
If we are sure that we don't want something to continue we will not allow a relationship to continue.
In either case we make up our mind pretty decisively; we don't blow "hot and cold"
If we are sure that we don't want something to continue we will not allow a relationship to continue.
In either case we make up our mind pretty decisively; we don't blow "hot and cold"
Posted by AriesGirl74
If we are unsure then we tend to go with giving people another chance coz Aries always have hope.
If we are sure that we don't want something to continue we will not allow a relationship to continue.
In either case we make up our mind pretty decisively; we don't blow "hot and cold"
Do you think because I've had a few she's very unsure and thinks she'll just get hurt?
Posted by kp24Posted by AriesGirl74
If we are unsure then we tend to go with giving people another chance coz Aries always have hope.
If we are sure that we don't want something to continue we will not allow a relationship to continue.
In either case we make up our mind pretty decisively; we don't blow "hot and cold"
Do you think because I've had a few she's very unsure and thinks she'll just get hurt?click to expand
Just message her, you lose nothing. if she tells you where to go oh well never mind. you'll meet someone else
we don't do Hot/Cold
it either is or isn't
Posted by lcrcPosted by kp24Posted by AriesGirl74
If we are unsure then we tend to go with giving people another chance coz Aries always have hope.
If we are sure that we don't want something to continue we will not allow a relationship to continue.
In either case we make up our mind pretty decisively; we don't blow "hot and cold"
Do you think because I've had a few she's very unsure and thinks she'll just get hurt?
Just message her, you lose nothing. if she tells you where to go oh well never mind. you'll meet someone else
we don't do Hot/Cold
it either is or isn'tclick to expand
Can't message her, blocked aren't I!
Posted by kp24Posted by AriesGirl74
If we are unsure then we tend to go with giving people another chance coz Aries always have hope.
If we are sure that we don't want something to continue we will not allow a relationship to continue.
In either case we make up our mind pretty decisively; we don't blow "hot and cold"
Do you think because I've had a few she's very unsure and thinks she'll just get hurt?click to expand
"Had a few" what?
Like I said if we don't want, then we just don't want. If I block someone but regret it/change my mind I can be quite decisive and be the one to hunt that guy down and tell him I made a mistake; I don't have a problem with that.
Silence from an Aries though is bad news I'm afraid...really bad lol
Posted by AriesGirl74Posted by kp24Posted by AriesGirl74
If we are unsure then we tend to go with giving people another chance coz Aries always have hope.
If we are sure that we don't want something to continue we will not allow a relationship to continue.
In either case we make up our mind pretty decisively; we don't blow "hot and cold"
Do you think because I've had a few she's very unsure and thinks she'll just get hurt?
"Had a few" what?
Like I said if we don't want, then we just don't want. If I block someone but regret it/change my mind I can be quite decisive and be the one to hunt that guy down and tell him I made a mistake; I don't have a problem with that.
Silence from an Aries though is bad news I'm afraid...really bad lolclick to expand
Chances.
Well like I said we had a call Sunday morning and it went well. I didn't call her again because I didn't want to bug her that evening. Monday morning comes and this is on her twitter
I would just back off. If she's one of those Aries girls who posts "subliminal" messages to try and "reach out" to a certain person...she is immature and she's doing it for some reaction. Ignore it, don't get sucked in.
Back off and if she feels anything for you then she will show you by her ACTIONS; Aries will seek you out. If she doesn't reach out to you, it's over.
Back off and if she feels anything for you then she will show you by her ACTIONS; Aries will seek you out. If she doesn't reach out to you, it's over.
Posted by AriesGirl74
I would just back off. If she's one of those Aries girls who posts "subliminal" messages to try and "reach out" to a certain person...she is immature and she's doing it for some reaction. Ignore it, don't get sucked in.
Back off and if she feels anything for you then she will show you by her ACTIONS; Aries will seek you out. If she doesn't reach out to you, it's over.
Yeah I feel I should be making the effort to make this work as it was mostly my fault why we didn't. It seems she's waiting for the effort and she'll respond to that.
Not sure NC is the way to go, but people probably know better than me
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