Leo123_
@Leo123_
9 Years
Comments: 0 · Posts: 80 · Topics: 2
In despair - blocked without reason by Cancerian girl.
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I also want to add that she has actually said to me before that if she falls in love with someone, she runs in the opposite direction. She has tried to be my friend for such a long time, but she can't treat me good and "normal" as she does with her other friends, she can't commit to me because she is too afraid and I believed she wanted to see if I came back to her which I am planning on doing, and now she all of the sudden does this, like suddenly cutting me out of her life so now I have no idea what I should do. This hurts so badly, more than anything and it hurts me even more that she can't trust me when I am trustworthy, honest, open, loving, caring and deeply in love with her.
Well, Cancers a tend to suffer from mood swings, and they are also pessimistic and will give up hope completely if they feel that they will fail or if they do. She might have a fear of being hurt again or even rejection. Cancers wear their heart on their sleeves as well so they have an underbelly characteristic.The similarities between this sign and its symbol continue because both have extremely soft underbellies. It's no secret that Cancers are easily hurt; and their wounds take a very long time to heal.
Posted by libraqueenNo to every single one of these questions, and also - I want to add that I am a girl as well and to be honest, she has put me through hell. It seems like the more feelings she gets, the worse this gets.
Hmm
Did you watch porn
Have you talked to any girls recently
Have you talked about her to anyone, for example sex with her.
This goes hand in hand with the did you watch porn question, but does she have access to your browser history? did you search for something she would be offended over
That's all I can think of. It's not normal for girls to get upset over nothin. It HAS to be something. Think hard
Posted by PrincessLouiseIt is 8 years, she lied about her age to me so I thought she was elder when I fell in love. If I am thinking more and more about this I can see that it has been a little crazy from the beginning with all the manipulative ways, possessiveness and lying ways. She warned me from the beginning that she is not a good person when in a relationship, but we are not even in a relationship but maybe that does not help if the feelings either way are like this.
What is the age disparity? You said young?
How young is she? Could it be her parents blocking you?
I would just leave her be. I'd say you did something. If you didn't I would just leave her be.
Sorry you are hurting but it's been so dramatic I don't know how to patch etc nor if you should if what you say is true.
But something seems off.
Posted by leo16I feel that she honestly is trying to make up bad things about me in her mind over and over again that does not even add up in real life, because I have felt from the start that she cannot just believe that I actually like her, and only her. It seems like no matter what I do, it is just not good enough because she is too afraid and she do not want to trust me.
Well, Cancers a tend to suffer from mood swings, and they are also pessimistic and will give up hope completely if they feel that they will fail or if they do. She might have a fear of being hurt again or even rejection. Cancers wear their heart on their sleeves as well so they have an underbelly characteristic.The similarities between this sign and its symbol continue because both have extremely soft underbellies. It's no secret that Cancers are easily hurt; and their wounds take a very long time to heal.
Posted by libraqueen
I think she's just crazy. I'm sorry, but she doesn't seem sane and I don't think this is a Cancer girl thing. Does she have daddy issues?
LOL
Posted by libraqueenI think she has issues with absolutely everything. She changes so much, sometimes I honestly feel she is like two different persons and I do not mean only moodiness, it's deeper.
I think she's just crazy. I'm sorry, but she doesn't seem sane and I don't think this is a Cancer girl thing. Does she have daddy issues?
Maybe I am suppose to let this go now, after everything I have seen, gone through and to think about how she has treated me. It is just so hard when you care so deeply for someone but at this point - what else can I do anyway? I do not have much of a choice and if she decides to do this right before I travel back home then she has made her choice anyway - She does not want me in her life for whatever reasons, probably a whole lot of different reasons and she cannot handle it right now. Also I would have to ask myself - Is this how I want my life? What will happen later on when it has been so dramatic with her form the start? What will she put me through later when she has put me through so much already? I would not wonder if she slowly "comes back" after a month or something and acts like nothing ever happened. When she calms down and think rationally again, just like the other times. It is just that this time it is so bad and so deep but at the same time the last days together has also been the best and most intense ones so far. If I have learned one thing it is that I am too kind. She cut me out of her life, and if this is what she wants then maybe I am suppose to just let it be, once and for all.
Posted by Leo123_I'd let it go. As a Leo, a FIRE sign you probably wouldn't do well with a WATER sign either way. What does water do to fire? Either puts it out or makes it worse. They tend to be very sensitive and Leo's are brutally honest and straightforward sometimes hurting peoples feelings. Let her go. She seems like she's still finding herself. That or she wants you to chase her. Which I as a LEO DONT DO. too much pride.
Maybe I am suppose to let this go now, after everything I have seen, gone through and to think about how she has treated me. It is just so hard when you care so deeply for someone but at this point - what else can I do anyway? I do not have much of a choice and if she decides to do this right before I travel back home then she has made her choice anyway - She does not want me in her life for whatever reasons, probably a whole lot of different reasons and she cannot handle it right now. Also I would have to ask myself - Is this how I want my life? What will happen later on when it has been so dramatic with her form the start? What will she put me through later when she has put me through so much already? I would not wonder if she slowly "comes back" after a month or something and acts like nothing ever happened. When she calms down and think rationally again, just like the other times. It is just that this time it is so bad and so deep but at the same time the last days together has also been the best and most intense ones so far. If I have learned one thing it is that I am too kind. She cut me out of her life, and if this is what she wants then maybe I am suppose to just let it be, once and for all.
She needs to see a therapist, she sounds just like me when I met my husband, I would also pre warn potential partners I would probably push them away now and again if I felt myself getting too close, she has probably had to suffer a painful rejection before, perhaps more than one, I don't know, if your not even in a relationship and she is behaving like this.
I ended up becoming violent in trying to push my husband away, which is why I needed medical help, I was also abusive and drank too much now and again which made my insecurities even worse, I was in a world of pain and torment and was diagnosed with depression, it was my husband who made me go to the doctor, he had just about given up on me after only being together a couple of years, poor guy, when I look back, jeez!
Try to get her to seek some medical advice, its not normal if its ruining her life and other peoples, a little insecurity is normal obviously no matter what sun sign she is, but if your reassuring isn't helping that's not good, she is not hearing you and allowing her insecurity to rule her emotional world, she convinced you are a liar, a cheat and you will hurt her no matter what, don't you see, its just not normal or healthy.
Sorry for rambling, I hope this helps you understand her way of feeling a little better, but it sounds to me she has decided you are no good anyway, she has convinced herself as a safety mechanism that she needs to get rid of you before you reject her, its the only way she knows how to control the anxiety.Hope she finds the courage to get help x
I ended up becoming violent in trying to push my husband away, which is why I needed medical help, I was also abusive and drank too much now and again which made my insecurities even worse, I was in a world of pain and torment and was diagnosed with depression, it was my husband who made me go to the doctor, he had just about given up on me after only being together a couple of years, poor guy, when I look back, jeez!
Try to get her to seek some medical advice, its not normal if its ruining her life and other peoples, a little insecurity is normal obviously no matter what sun sign she is, but if your reassuring isn't helping that's not good, she is not hearing you and allowing her insecurity to rule her emotional world, she convinced you are a liar, a cheat and you will hurt her no matter what, don't you see, its just not normal or healthy.
Sorry for rambling, I hope this helps you understand her way of feeling a little better, but it sounds to me she has decided you are no good anyway, she has convinced herself as a safety mechanism that she needs to get rid of you before you reject her, its the only way she knows how to control the anxiety.Hope she finds the courage to get help x
I had 2 long term cancer female friends, one never behaved like this, the other one did, and she was closer to me than the more stable one, both same age, the stable one who was always lovely towards me was brought up in a 2 parent loving family unit with her sister, the non stable one grew up in a single parent home, her mother drank all day long in the pub, used men for money, she and her brothers had been in and out of care ect ect, she was always expected to look after the baby, I would keep her company while her mum went drinking, she grew up being abusive towards men and finally me after 10 years of friendship, I often wonder how she is, but I hope she isn't still taking her emotional damage out on other people, and settled now and happy, just saying sometimes we need a little help, you are probably better off pulling away for now,tell her when she gets help for her problems you'll still be waiting, but until she does something positive its useless you trying to be there for her the way she is.
Girl that's some psychological issues not astrology ones. Poor kid sounds like a survivor. Kimmy Schmidt but more scary.
Posted by leo16I think you are right and I feel that I have no choice. She is still finding herself, that is for sure. Thanks.Posted by Leo123_I'd let it go. As a Leo, a FIRE sign you probably wouldn't do well with a WATER sign either way. What does water do to fire? Either puts it out or makes it worse. They tend to be very sensitive and Leo's are brutally honest and straightforward sometimes hurting peoples feelings. Let her go. She seems like she's still finding herself. That or she wants you to chase her. Which I as a LEO DONT DO. too much pride.
Maybe I am suppose to let this go now, after everything I have seen, gone through and to think about how she has treated me. It is just so hard when you care so deeply for someone but at this point - what else can I do anyway? I do not have much of a choice and if she decides to do this right before I travel back home then she has made her choice anyway - She does not want me in her life for whatever reasons, probably a whole lot of different reasons and she cannot handle it right now. Also I would have to ask myself - Is this how I want my life? What will happen later on when it has been so dramatic with her form the start? What will she put me through later when she has put me through so much already? I would not wonder if she slowly "comes back" after a month or something and acts like nothing ever happened. When she calms down and think rationally again, just like the other times. It is just that this time it is so bad and so deep but at the same time the last days together has also been the best and most intense ones so far. If I have learned one thing it is that I am too kind. She cut me out of her life, and if this is what she wants then maybe I am suppose to just let it be, once and for all.click to expand
Posted by piscespoppyI am so glad to hear that your husband did this and helped you, and I am so glad for you two. Yes, she is convinced of all these things all of the sudden and it happened before as well just not this much, but then she let it go and everything was good again, but this time she has totally blocked me out and I can't do anything about it at this point. It is just hurting too much, and I know she is hurting too and that she needs help but I am not able to help her or do anything for her when she absolutely does not want anything to do with me right now, even if I did not to nothing to her other than being kind because I care deeply for her. She even said to me that she does not care about me at all, which I know is a huge lie, just like many other lies before that where she suddenly comes back and shows in absolutely every way and every action how much she cares for me. I believe our three days together where we got really close and where I felt we finally were taking some big steps forward just got too much for her, so now she has snapped and shut me out. Maybe for good, maybe not, but I cannot live my life like this. It is destroying and it is painful, especially when she does it right before I am leaving so she does not have to say goodbye to me. It's really heartbreaking.
She needs to see a therapist, she sounds just like me when I met my husband, I would also pre warn potential partners I would probably push them away now and again if I felt myself getting too close, she has probably had to suffer a painful rejection before, perhaps more than one, I don't know, if your not even in a relationship and she is behaving like this.
I ended up becoming violent in trying to push my husband away, which is why I needed medical help, I was also abusive and drank too much now and again which made my insecurities even worse, I was in a world of pain and torment and was diagnosed with depression, it was my husband who made me go to the doctor, he had just about given up on me after only being together a couple of years, poor guy, when I look back, jeez!
Try to get her to seek some medical advice, its not normal if its ruining her life and other peoples, a little insecurity is normal obviously no matter what sun sign she is, but if your reassuring isn't helping that's not good, she is not hearing you and allowing her insecurity to rule her emotional world, she convinced you are a liar, a cheat and you will hurt her no matter what, don't you see, its just not normal or healthy.
Sorry for rambling, I hope this helps you understand her way of feeling a little better, but it sounds to me she has decided you are no good anyway, she has convinced herself as a safety mechanism that she needs to get rid of you before you reject her, its the only way she knows how to control the anxiety.Hope she finds the courage to get help x
Posted by leo16First off im a cancer and this is 100 not like me or any cancer i know '
Well, Cancers a tend to suffer from mood swings, and they are also pessimistic and will give up hope completely if they feel that they will fail or if they do. She might have a fear of being hurt again or even rejection. Cancers wear their heart on their sleeves as well so they have an underbelly characteristic.The similarities between this sign and its symbol continue because both have extremely soft underbellies. It's no secret that Cancers are easily hurt; and their wounds take a very long time to heal.
And leos and cancers r good. I honestly agree with the other repsonse she sound crazy and not sane. Like wtf is wrong with her? U dont need that stress or drama. I know lesbian couples relationship is way more intense than hetero rel this girl has a few issues. We all been hurt but she seems negative u know. In the end im sure u do what right. Its always the good ones with crazy ppl i dont understand. Im questioning why.
Posted by MissGemmiI am sad to hear you have been through the same thing. Can I ask you how you backed off, like what you did to back off? You still have contact, right?
I've been through the same thing with a cancer. Except I'm a Gemini. From day one it was a battle and it is uptil now. We haven't gotten any further from where we've started and it's been 3 years now. She plays too many mind games and lots of manipulation. There's always someone who she finds better than me. She said she wanted me as a friend, but she can't even bring it to herself to treat me as one.
I think she likes to be involved in tough love. She likes it difficult and I was way too easy.
You should back off, like I did. Now she questions the fact why I'm hiding. I'm not hiding I'm just tired being pushed away and seeing her with people she finds more fitting than me, while I tried to be the best of me to her.
I know it is difficult, but now that she has blocked you, change your number and delete all she had access to. It will give you time to get over this and heal and she needs to learn that she can't just block people and have her easy way in again. Let her fight for you. You are a prize, but she's too young to recognize that.
I will just not do anything right now, because what can I do. She has already blocked me and I am not going to try to reach out to her again because she has made it clear that she does not want it and that she has made her choice so she better stick to it and not regret it later because I need to get over her. It has been hard for her from the start to realize that I actually like her so much and I think it is killing her seeing how people easily "surround" themselves around me, I have a lot of friends, I am social, I am smart, I am elder than her etc. I am not flirting with anyone else and I have made it so clear that I only want her - still she can't treat me right and just can't believe in me even if I only have eyes for her and have had it since day 1.I am very loyal but she does not see it. It makes me a little nervous thinking about what if she contacts me again, what should I do then? It is hard for me to just cut someone off when they are obviously having issues, when I know what a good person they are on one side and when I care so much. It is just painful as h this whole thing.
Posted by piscespoppyIve seen this behavior in many signs who grew up in an unstable environment.
I had 2 long term cancer female friends, one never behaved like this, the other one did, and she was closer to me than the more stable one, both same age, the stable one who was always lovely towards me was brought up in a 2 parent loving family unit with her sister, the non stable one grew up in a single parent home, her mother drank all day long in the pub, used men for money, she and her brothers had been in and out of care ect ect, she was always expected to look after the baby, I would keep her company while her mum went drinking, she grew up being abusive towards men and finally me after 10 years of friendship, I often wonder how she is, but I hope she isn't still taking her emotional damage out on other people, and settled now and happy, just saying sometimes we need a little help, you are probably better off pulling away for now,tell her when she gets help for her problems you'll still be waiting, but until she does something positive its useless you trying to be there for her the way she is.
Posted by piscespoppyThat's a long time. Can I ask you, so the friendship ended when she started doing it to you?
I had 2 long term cancer female friends, one never behaved like this, the other one did, and she was closer to me than the more stable one, both same age, the stable one who was always lovely towards me was brought up in a 2 parent loving family unit with her sister, the non stable one grew up in a single parent home, her mother drank all day long in the pub, used men for money, she and her brothers had been in and out of care ect ect, she was always expected to look after the baby, I would keep her company while her mum went drinking, she grew up being abusive towards men and finally me after 10 years of friendship, I often wonder how she is, but I hope she isn't still taking her emotional damage out on other people, and settled now and happy, just saying sometimes we need a little help, you are probably better off pulling away for now,tell her when she gets help for her problems you'll still be waiting, but until she does something positive its useless you trying to be there for her the way she is.
I think you are right, and I see that I have no choice. I care too much for her which in the end only backfires on me because she can't take it right now. It is sad to think about that she really tried to be my friend and see over time what could happen, to protect herself from all the crazy feelings and thoughts she obviously gets when it is romantic feelings involved but neither one of us could stop that from happen. We clicked perfect from day one and now this happened. I can't be there for her, because she does not let me. She has always had troubles allowing me to be there for her, but she has little by little let me into her life then suddenly she shuts me out completely now. That's so harsh and even if she has troubles I just cannot believe someone could do it in this way to someone they care about. For me it is completely crazy and to be honest it breaks my heart.
Posted by kissmygritsI think you are right. I wish I could help her, but I can't and I wish she could trust me, but she is not able to.
Girl that's some psychological issues not astrology ones. Poor kid sounds like a survivor. Kimmy Schmidt but more scary.
Go to counseling together see if that helps
Posted by lovely77You are right, I really do not need it and I have been taking it some time now because it has not been this bad and I was hoping it would get better, but now? It is just way too much, it's crazy. Maybe I am/was blind because I am so in love with her.
And leos and cancers r good. I honestly agree with the other repsonse she sound crazy and not sane. Like wtf is wrong with her? U dont need that stress or drama. I know lesbian couples relationship is way more intense than hetero rel this girl has a few issues. We all been hurt but she seems negative u know. In the end im sure u do what right. Its always the good ones with crazy ppl i dont understand. Im questioning why.
Posted by lovely77She does not even let me into her life right now so how is that possible? It is not. I would do it in a heartbeat for her, but she has shut me out completely and I am traveling in a few days as well. But thank you for the advice.
Go to counseling together see if that helps
Posted by Vixen2I am not sure about this different signs thing, because I am not that known with astrology, how can I find this out? 🙂 My mom says that I have Cancer sign in me as well and I know that I do for sure. Maybe that is why I always tend to fall for water signs and why I am so sensitive as well?Posted by leo16Try being a Pisces sun w/Leo Moon and Sag rising 😉Posted by Leo123_I'd let it go. As a Leo, a FIRE sign you probably wouldn't do well with a WATER sign either way. What does water do to fire? Either puts it out or makes it worse. They tend to be very sensitive and Leo's are brutally honest and straightforward sometimes hurting peoples feelings. Let her go. She seems like she's still finding herself. That or she wants you to chase her. Which I as a LEO DONT DO. too much pride.
Maybe I am suppose to let this go now, after everything I have seen, gone through and to think about how she has treated me. It is just so hard when you care so deeply for someone but at this point - what else can I do anyway? I do not have much of a choice and if she decides to do this right before I travel back home then she has made her choice anyway - She does not want me in her life for whatever reasons, probably a whole lot of different reasons and she cannot handle it right now. Also I would have to ask myself - Is this how I want my life? What will happen later on when it has been so dramatic with her form the start? What will she put me through later when she has put me through so much already? I would not wonder if she slowly "comes back" after a month or something and acts like nothing ever happened. When she calms down and think rationally again, just like the other times. It is just that this time it is so bad and so deep but at the same time the last days together has also been the best and most intense ones so far. If I have learned one thing it is that I am too kind. She cut me out of her life, and if this is what she wants then maybe I am suppose to just let it be, once and for all.click to expand
Go to cafe astrology look up hers and yours too. R u a July leo?
Posted by lovely77Ok, thanks 🙂 Yes, I am.
Go to cafe astrology look up hers and yours too. R u a July leo?
She sounds borderline. I would remove her from.your life , she will only cause you more pain.
Posted by boxcarmirntaIt is so sad to hear, but probably so true and I am scared of how much I care for her, because if she is borderline or something else then she probably will calm down again at some point, maybe regret lashing out so harsh and maybe contact me again, so then I would have to make a choice as to what I want my life to be like.
She sounds borderline. I would remove her from.your life , she will only cause you more pain.
To be honest when I moved away and lost touch with my friend I was quite relieved, I had issues of my own as well as ive already explained, perhaps that is why we were drawn together as friends, idk?
But I witnessed her treat a few nice people like you like garbage, and dump them after she had used them for money, a roof for a while, when she did this to me, with a man she was seeing, they stayed at my house for a few days, she disappeared and the boyfriend wondered where she went,and his stereo! Ive never seen or heard from her since, that was 25 years ago, all ive heard about her family is that her baby brother when 12 sadly died of leukaemia.
I know its hard for you to not care and try to help, but when she calms down and wants to communicate with you in a few days you could always try to talk to her, but its up to you, it would mean you being firm with her and possibly upsetting her, but you need to get across that you care, your not going to put up with her crap anymore, sometimes it makes someone insecure feel secure just by being firm and honest, not gentle and wishy washy, say what you mean and mean what you say, but I still think she needs some help, she will probably deny it and get all angry, but if you are firm and stand your ground she will know you are serious and you care, tell her, (as another poster said) you are happy to go along to her doctors with her, just for support x
But I witnessed her treat a few nice people like you like garbage, and dump them after she had used them for money, a roof for a while, when she did this to me, with a man she was seeing, they stayed at my house for a few days, she disappeared and the boyfriend wondered where she went,and his stereo! Ive never seen or heard from her since, that was 25 years ago, all ive heard about her family is that her baby brother when 12 sadly died of leukaemia.
I know its hard for you to not care and try to help, but when she calms down and wants to communicate with you in a few days you could always try to talk to her, but its up to you, it would mean you being firm with her and possibly upsetting her, but you need to get across that you care, your not going to put up with her crap anymore, sometimes it makes someone insecure feel secure just by being firm and honest, not gentle and wishy washy, say what you mean and mean what you say, but I still think she needs some help, she will probably deny it and get all angry, but if you are firm and stand your ground she will know you are serious and you care, tell her, (as another poster said) you are happy to go along to her doctors with her, just for support x
Posted by piscespoppyI can understand why, it must have been hard and yes, I absolutely believe that could be a reason you were draw together as friends.
To be honest when I moved away and lost touch with my friend I was quite relieved, I had issues of my own as well as ive already explained, perhaps that is why we were drawn together as friends, idk?
But I witnessed her treat a few nice people like you like garbage, and dump them after she had used them for money, a roof for a while, when she did this to me, with a man she was seeing, they stayed at my house for a few days, she disappeared and the boyfriend wondered where she went,and his stereo! Ive never seen or heard from her since, that was 25 years ago, all ive heard about her family is that her baby brother when 12 sadly died of leukaemia.
I know its hard for you to not care and try to help, but when she calms down and wants to communicate with you in a few days you could always try to talk to her, but its up to you, it would mean you being firm with her and possibly upsetting her, but you need to get across that you care, your not going to put up with her crap anymore, sometimes it makes someone insecure feel secure just by being firm and honest, not gentle and wishy washy, say what you mean and mean what you say, but I still think she needs some help, she will probably deny it and get all angry, but if you are firm and stand your ground she will know you are serious and you care, tell her, (as another poster said) you are happy to go along to her doctors with her, just for support x
I don't even know if she will calm down this time since she has blocked and deleted me everywhere as well as our pictures together, that is brutal, it is absolutely insane doing this to another person without any explanation out of the blue and only saying that I am a bad person, a bad friend and that she don't care about me or my life at all. This is what I woke up to after our good days together. The other times she snapped she also said that she does not care but not in the extreme way as now. If she will contact me again I will say what I mean, because I cannot just ignore it, not this time. This is too extreme. I have been firm with her before after she did bad things but I have never been this hurt by her before. I honestly think that maybe I will never hear from her again, or maybe I will but it breaks my heart if I cannot even get a closure, a reason, a talk with her. She said on the phone that we could talk last night because I pressured her on at least talking with me, that she could not do it like this, but she never came. It is absolutely devastating and I do not remember when I was this hurt before in my life.
Can I ask you all if you believe there is a point for me in letting her know that this is not ok through e-mail or something, or is it better to not say anything at all? I just feel very wrongly treated which again makes me want to say at least something about it before stop initiating contact for good, I mean doing it for myself. It just feels so wrong this whole situation.
Posted by Vixen2Lol, whats so hard about it? Is it the sensitivity part??Posted by leo16Try being a Pisces sun w/Leo Moon and Sag rising 😉Posted by Leo123_I'd let it go. As a Leo, a FIRE sign you probably wouldn't do well with a WATER sign either way. What does water do to fire? Either puts it out or makes it worse. They tend to be very sensitive and Leo's are brutally honest and straightforward sometimes hurting peoples feelings. Let her go. She seems like she's still finding herself. That or she wants you to chase her. Which I as a LEO DONT DO. too much pride.
Maybe I am suppose to let this go now, after everything I have seen, gone through and to think about how she has treated me. It is just so hard when you care so deeply for someone but at this point - what else can I do anyway? I do not have much of a choice and if she decides to do this right before I travel back home then she has made her choice anyway - She does not want me in her life for whatever reasons, probably a whole lot of different reasons and she cannot handle it right now. Also I would have to ask myself - Is this how I want my life? What will happen later on when it has been so dramatic with her form the start? What will she put me through later when she has put me through so much already? I would not wonder if she slowly "comes back" after a month or something and acts like nothing ever happened. When she calms down and think rationally again, just like the other times. It is just that this time it is so bad and so deep but at the same time the last days together has also been the best and most intense ones so far. If I have learned one thing it is that I am too kind. She cut me out of her life, and if this is what she wants then maybe I am suppose to just let it be, once and for all.click to expand
Posted by LuckyLibra979I cannot believe it and it is hard to accept when she does it in this way. It is the most selfish and cruel thing ever. She obviously has made up her mind, but I still think it is absolutely crazy and that she is making a mistake. Maybe she even know this, maybe it's the ting when she said she runs in the opposite direction if she is falling in love, I have no idea, I just keep thinking about the last days together. When everything is so good, how can someone do like this? Thank you so much. I do not know how to get through this one, but I have no choice. She really broke my heart in pieces and at this moment I am broken.
I saw a bunch of red flags. Her needing space and acting even more indifferent when she gets it is not a good sign. When cancers pull away it's usually for good because they require alot of comfort so of they are running from yours it's not a good sign. Even if it isn't your fault. And she knows this, she's emotionally overwhelmed and you coming around will make her more distant.
Just know its just something only she can deal with. A cancer woman or any woman like that will drive you insane. I've been thru that once. She couldn't figure out what I did wrong, truth was it was nothing. We spent every night for a month straight being intimate and affectionate and then all of a sudden she disappeared. Lil hoe was cheating. Not saying that's the case with you, Just saying I saved alot of heartbreak by knowing what's up and letting go. My hunch was right thank God I left without questioning further
I wish you the best tho hate you gotta go thru that but my advice is to let it go because her mind seems made up and cancers can be extremely stubborn. You have to pick up on them which is even harder for the more open n direct fire signs. Hope it works out for you
She dont deserve u. U seem sweet u will find someone. Wat do u like about her and why?
Posted by lovely77I like the person I maybe thought she was (?), which I could have been wrong about because she changed all of the sudden so I don't even know if she is that person I believed she was anymore. My head is just spinning. She was so sweet, kind, caring, beautiful, funny and seemed so loving, smart and easy to talk to, we had long and open conversations about everything and we were just perfect together. The more close I got to her she got more manipulative, she sometimes said things just to "plant " something in my mind so that I should change something about me or my life I think, she started picking on how I dressed or my body figure saying she did not like that figure in general and that she liked another type of figure ( I work out and are "fit" but have hips and curves ) when I know the way I look is just exactly what she fell for and has a weak spot for but she changes what she says about something over time, she did not want me to drink or go out and tried to get me make the decision by myself without saying it directly, she all of the sudden knew the code to my phone after just a little time spent together, every time I felt she showed how much she liked me she made sure that I suddenly would hear something from her that clearly was suppose to show me that she did not like me when in fact I knew she really did, she tried to avoid me going places where people would hit on me, she convinced me about other people tricking me in my life which I in the end believed, she tried to make me jealous many times but never went too far because she knows I do not take that. Sometimes I feel that she tries to hurt me on purpose or "punish" me, and then "takes" me back when I have been broken and alone, then she does it all over again, and now this - The most crazy thing so far right before I am leaving the country, right after we have had the perfect days together, right after she made me believe that I was "safe" with her and that she really cared about me which she knows is going to hurt me more than anything, and I don't even know if it is all a game for her, if she want's control over me because she knows how much I am in love with her and how good person I am or if she has just snapped and does not want anything to do with me. Either way I feel that I have been a little ( a lot? ) blind. Is she crazy and is she trying to break me down on purpose? I do not understand.
She dont deserve u. U seem sweet u will find someone. Wat do u like about her and why?
Which part?
Posted by FirstDecanTaurianWomen0428
@Op- Man or woman lady sometimes you can't help issues or insecurity of another. In other words everyone has been hurt sometime in their life. If a person revealed to me they have been hurt before getting in. Then detach to think about dealing with it all over again.
is that better?
Posted by FirstDecanTaurianWomen0428
Which part?@princesslouise—
She is breaking u down. U have to ask ur self why r u allowing someone to break ur beautiful positive spirit. U tried to love her all u can do is be ur best and let it be.
Posted by lovely77I have no idea why I would allow it. I guess I was and am still a little blind and I just do not understand why she would want to break me down, I do not understand the reason for it. I guess it is just hard seeing and accepting that the person you thought were a sweet, kind and caring person suddenly turning into someone who tries to destroy me in so many ways when I have been so good to her. She was very depressed and "dark" before she met me, and then her life and spirit changed little by little after we met turning into a more positive and happy person, and now she does this. Every day now I wake up to these little things she does that is breaking me down more and more. I cannot believe it.
She is breaking u down. U have to ask ur self why r u allowing someone to break ur beautiful positive spirit. U tried to love her all u can do is be ur best and let it be.
Have u told her at any point how she make u feel?
Posted by lovely77In which way? The good or the bad? She knows how strong feelings I have for her. We have never openly talked about the bad things she does because she never sees it so I cannot even communicate openly with her because she gets furious. In her eyes, nothing is her fault, everything is my fault and I am a bad person according to her every time she gets angry, at least that is what she says when she is mad at me, before she became sweet and kind again. Always back and forth, always questioning me, always manipulating. And now she has made up a story in her mind that I am such a bad person that I cannot even be in her life, just out of the blue after our good days together. She even laughed on the phone, saying I was not smart, that I am selfish and a lot of crap which totally broke me. She promised we could talk later that night but she never came, she apparently said it just so the argument could be over and so that she does not have to talk to me about anything, and now she has even made other people in her life block me out, little by little, not all at once. Sometimes I even wonder if she is planning so much in her mind, I have no idea who she is anymore and it scares me, but I think she really wants to just hurt me badly at this point, and she is succeeding.
Have u told her at any point how she make u feel?
Posted by PrincessLouisePosted by Leo123_I guess you are right, and I have let her do it to me and she pushes and pushes the limits, and this time by far the worst ever. From being all sweet and kind to slowly turning into someone else, or turning into who she really is. And I honestly believes that she believes in what she is telling herself in the moment, what she is telling herself to justify the way she treats other people. Why would someone do this, it just doesn't make sense to me, but maybe because I am not like that, I could never ever do this to another person, especially not to someone I was suppose to care for. Is she even able to really care?Posted by lovely77I know.
I cannot believe it.
That's normal. It's reasonable. You were totally convinced. You had every right to believe it. But it's not love. She doesn't love you. She may even think she does. But she doesn't. You didn't 'allow it'. No one asks to be hurt.You didn't know. That's what people say. Oh her husband had an affair??! Oh She must have known. He hit her and said he wouldn't so she took him back and it happened again. Oh she must have known etc. You did nothing wrong. And still if you take her back in good faith. You will be doing nothing wrong. She has done this. Blocked you etc. To get a reaction. To control you. To make you come after her. But she still doesn't love you.And if you take her back you won't be doing anything stupid or wrong. And it's not stupid. But she still doesn't love you. She is venting her abuse on you. I don't know what you should do. Or say to her if anything. I am just saying to you what my gut says I should say. You could send a message leaving it up to her to contact you from now on. You could try to see her in person.. You could cut her off. I don't know. Even if she thinks she loves you. She doesn't. And she could well believe she does too.click to expand
Unfortunately you picked someone who doesn't care about you and is extremely self absorbed. You can care about her all you want...but its not reciprocal and prolly never will be. She has major issues that have nothing to do with you. Let her go....
Posted by MissGemmi
You have the exact same story as mine.
I've been pushed away a trillion times. Never was I blocked, but I've been ignored. Never good enough, while I was there for her every second she needed me. I know I'm her 'type', but she would look at me, like I'm some kind of a monster. When I would get hit on by others, she would take my hand and get me out of the situation or she would say nasty things about me (loud enough so the other person could hear it).
I would shower her with gifts, attention all that I could offer, never got the same back (I thought it was ok, just because I did, doesn't mean she has to), just to find out that she bought or was attentive to everyone but me. I have invited her over a million times to my place, she would decline, just to find out she would have sleep overs with others. When I text her she would text me a few days later, while I know she's in her phone constantly.
All this and she would keep me around. I was so in love that I knew it wasn't ok, but I couldn't get out of it. Thinking that maybe she would one day realize that I'm all she ever needed. I gave up the illusion, because I know she can come up with anyone, she has so many suitors and is able to connect to them the same way she does with me.
This all sounds scary familiar with this girl and me. I cannot believe someone would do this to another human being. I am sad that you had to go through it, and thank you for sharing your story. Maybe I should try and be grateful that she actually blocked me out now, maybe this is saving me from a lot of more heartache. Unless she comes back and I take her back like nothing happened if this is a part of her twisted game, but at this point I cannot do it and I wont, not in this way. This is not how it is supposed to be. I have a healthy love to give, but I do not think she can receive a healthy love nor give it back, even if she wanted to. It also has crossed my mind these last days that she knows I am not in a normal situation in my life being here, not knowing anyone else but her and her friends and family which she so easy can part from me and she actually does it. She knows that I came here only to see her and she takes advantage of it. In the beginning everything was perfect then it started falling more and more apart. She has put me through so much and every time she decides to do a lot of nice things for me and makes me feel totally safe with her and in her life, she end up doing something that takes it away and now - worse than never before. It sometimes feel like she does it on purpose, but I just think that's how it is for her and that she can't help it. I do not recognize the girl I fell in love with.
Posted by boxcarmirntaI guess you are right. I just can't get it into my thick head that she actually does not care, after how much she has showed with her actions that she cares about me, but even so, she is apparently not able to love in a normal healthy way anyway so it really does not matter because her actions and circle still remains the same. The closer we got, the meaner she got and I actually think she knew this would happened from the start, but she could not help it since I was all over her and she over me. That is why she tried to stay my friend as well without being too romantic, so that she could treat me right because she sort of warned me a little in the beginning about how she acts in a relationship, but it all seemed a little innocent, so I ignored it. I see now that I should not have but I don't want to regret it, I just want to move forward because it hurts so bad.
Unfortunately you picked someone who doesn't care about you and is extremely self absorbed. You can care about her all you want...but its not reciprocal and prolly never will be. She has major issues that have nothing to do with you. Let her go....
Posted by Leo123_Can I just say this? If you really LOVE her, you will wait for her. Don't force it, just wait. Continue showing your loyalty- and maybe, just maybe it'll get through to her and then she'll realize that you truly love her. It could be an episodic attack- not really a normal cancer thing but once her emotions die down she will contact you if she loves you. Be there when she does because if your gone then it'll hit her worse and she'll most likely never trust you. Just give yourselves some space. It'll be good for you and her. Sometimes humans just need someone by there sides that won't fight and resist them. Go along with it.
Maybe I am suppose to let this go now, after everything I have seen, gone through and to think about how she has treated me. It is just so hard when you care so deeply for someone but at this point - what else can I do anyway? I do not have much of a choice and if she decides to do this right before I travel back home then she has made her choice anyway - She does not want me in her life for whatever reasons, probably a whole lot of different reasons and she cannot handle it right now. Also I would have to ask myself - Is this how I want my life? What will happen later on when it has been so dramatic with her form the start? What will she put me through later when she has put me through so much already? I would not wonder if she slowly "comes back" after a month or something and acts like nothing ever happened. When she calms down and think rationally again, just like the other times. It is just that this time it is so bad and so deep but at the same time the last days together has also been the best and most intense ones so far. If I have learned one thing it is that I am too kind. She cut me out of her life, and if this is what she wants then maybe I am suppose to just let it be, once and for all.
Posted by cancertheropyYes, I do and no, I won't just disappear if she comes back to me because I just can't, it would be not being true to myself and the person I am, but I will tell her how I feel about it all. I only need to try to "let it go" for now and forgive her to continue my life as normal as possible because this girl is something else and I have fallen hard for her. I try to do the right thing for me but at the same time being there for her when and if she comes back. At least I will know if she ever cared.Posted by Leo123_Can I just say this? If you really LOVE her, you will wait for her. Don't force it, just wait. Continue showing your loyalty- and maybe, just maybe it'll get through to her and then she'll realize that you truly love her. It could be an episodic attack- not really a normal cancer thing but once her emotions die down she will contact you if she loves you. Be there when she does because if your gone then it'll hit her worse and she'll most likely never trust you. Just give yourselves some space. It'll be good for you and her. Sometimes humans just need someone by there sides that won't fight and resist them. Go along with it.
Maybe I am suppose to let this go now, after everything I have seen, gone through and to think about how she has treated me. It is just so hard when you care so deeply for someone but at this point - what else can I do anyway? I do not have much of a choice and if she decides to do this right before I travel back home then she has made her choice anyway - She does not want me in her life for whatever reasons, probably a whole lot of different reasons and she cannot handle it right now. Also I would have to ask myself - Is this how I want my life? What will happen later on when it has been so dramatic with her form the start? What will she put me through later when she has put me through so much already? I would not wonder if she slowly "comes back" after a month or something and acts like nothing ever happened. When she calms down and think rationally again, just like the other times. It is just that this time it is so bad and so deep but at the same time the last days together has also been the best and most intense ones so far. If I have learned one thing it is that I am too kind. She cut me out of her life, and if this is what she wants then maybe I am suppose to just let it be, once and for all.click to expand
😄 what a confusing huh... She will return to you, but if she hasnt dated any other guy yet.. Its her moody things
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