the dumping garden (Page 21)

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lnana04
@lnana04
15 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 2 · Posts: 8822 · Topics: 132
Omg, why do i think i just walked by the Taurus from Scottrade?

Im so sneaky. I pay my bills and afterwards treat myself to something to eat in the downtown area. Instead of catching the train back, i walk back because a) I like walking and being outdoors, b) he works like right there so I get a chance to walk past in hope that he's looking out the open glass window.

Well i think i just caught him. Im not 100% sure because I didnt look at his face lol, just looked up and saw a tall, dark, bald guy dressed in slacks and a blue buttoned shirt walking towards me with a friend. I know it was him because i was even attracted to his walk plus we past eachother by the corner of his job. I couldnt even lift my eyes once he was near to confirm and i noticed when he was right by me he put his head down and was laughing at the friend. *sigh* That is a man right there!

I remember describing him to my Cap friend and him basically in many words saying i dont stand a chance. He said that guy could have any woman he wants, and goodness i bet its true lol.
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CreepyPants
@CreepyPants
20 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 233 · Posts: 8226 · Topics: 348
dont forget what i told you...

"'if you cant handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell dont deserve me at my best.' -Marilyn Monroe"

your patience bailed so easily with everyone and me. and so i put an end to mine because you took advantage of mine the most. pushed me to the brink and scrutinized when i broke. well i've crumbled and there's no picking up the pieces.

i hope you realize that you try to bring these issues up all the time. still ...as if it might be reconcilable, as though there is more to say, as though there's something that's not been heard... or said, or as if i might admit to more than what was my fault.

you have a ghost of me left now... take advantage of her. if you ever want me back, you'll find me... just outside of your reach.
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lnana04
@lnana04
15 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 2 · Posts: 8822 · Topics: 132
well I guess the Taurus is pissed. just finished texting him back n forth about nothing and he texts "open up im outside" I reply "no you are not! my apt is a mess" and he replies how its always a mess, and he dont understand why since its only two people(actually three), and how I need to tell my sis to get off her behind and clean, and fuss at my niece too. he was upset because there were a few jabs in there, which is how he do when upset lol, and He had a point, but I know it stems from him not being able to come in or pop up, which the popping up was really my issue.

my sis though, she really doesn't clean much. I do nearly everything and its sooo frustrating. i get so angry inside when i have to come home from work and clean. sad thing is, my Cap friend is in the same position with his wife and her kids(she has three but they only have one together). Pays all the bills, come homse to a messy house that he has to clean, plus he cooks. he says he doesn't even fuss anymore because its not worth getting upset when nothing changes for long.

im not sure what it is with us. I want to say maybe our libra mars, but even in that video "when Cap meets Leo" I felt that Cap guy was grooming her to be spoiled and dependant.
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lnana04
@lnana04
15 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 2 · Posts: 8822 · Topics: 132
@truecap, I tell my sis all the time to clean...all the time, but I dont demand it. I guess Im afraid of both how she and I will respond. Like if I get to a point where I have to demand something and she still does things when she want(this is her thing when I get a bit bossy), or dont do them at all, Im just afraid Im going to rage a bit. Im afraid of my temper because at that point Ive put myself out there and a demand is like the last resort. I just dont want to get crazy. I guess I dont know how to balance things, or get people to cooperate because its either one extreme (Ill do everything) or the other (my temper will flare up)., so I just go with the "Ill do everything" option. I really need to figure something out though....a balance.

@capgirl, Im the same way. It bothers me to to see, or hear, how irritated someone is to do what I ask, so like you ill just take over again. *sigh* LoL at him grumbling though. Opposites are so alike to me because I have a Taurus cousin that takes long/deep sighs to get her way. it bothers me soooo bad, that I end up giving in.

IM going to try to figure something out today.
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truecap
@truecap
13 Years10,000+ Posts

Comments: 8 · Posts: 20090 · Topics: 685
Posted by lnana04
@truecap, I tell my sis all the time to clean...all the time, but I dont demand it. I guess Im afraid of both how she and I will respond. Like if I get to a point where I have to demand something and she still does things when she want(this is her thing when I get a bit bossy), or dont do them at all, Im just afraid Im going to rage a bit. Im afraid of my temper because at that point Ive put myself out there and a demand is like the last resort. I just dont want to get crazy. I guess I dont know how to balance things, or get people to cooperate because its either one extreme (Ill do everything) or the other (my temper will flare up)., so I just go with the "Ill do everything" option. I really need to figure something out though....a balance.

@capgirl, Im the same way. It bothers me to to see, or hear, how irritated someone is to do what I ask, so like you ill just take over again. *sigh* LoL at him grumbling though. Opposites are so alike to me because I have a Taurus cousin that takes long/deep sighs to get her way. it bothers me soooo bad, that I end up giving in.

IM going to try to figure something out today.



In this situation, it's okay to blow up. You've asked her over and over and you don't want to live that way. I suggest one of two things:
1. Go ballistic and tell her very calmly, coldly and directly to get her act together.
2. Warn her that whatever she leaves laying around the house that Saturday at noon you will be throwing it in the trash. You have to mean it and do it and follow through. It doesn't matter if they are $ 200 shoes, bills, food, cell phone, whatever - just toss them out. (or at least put a bag in the trunk of your car to make her think you did).

Otherwise, she is going to keep on because she knows you clean up and she knows you won't ever do anything to her and she won't have any consequences. Why should she do it when you'll do it for her. So, you have, have, HAVE to show her you mean business.

Of course, #1 is my cap mercury in play, #2 is the aqua mars in play. See what you can pull from those placements and what will work best for you. But, you do need to do something with this situation. You've been complaining about this for months.
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lnana04
@lnana04
15 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 2 · Posts: 8822 · Topics: 132
@truecap, I thought Id handle it how she handles things. Calmly. By the time I do speak up Im irritated and it doesnt work. Yesterday on my way home I calmly said "we are having clean up day when I get in" and she said okay. We started cleaning and she thoroughly did her closet full of clothes. She started hurting(kidnet stone) so she stopped but this morning after she dropped my niece to school shefinished cleaning without me saying anything..

When she wants me or anyone else to move shes real calm and nonchalant about it....how I use to be, but thats it. Im not going to get upset anymore. Just say whatever I have to in the calmest way possible. When im upset that gives her "something" to kind of hold on to as to why she's not moving. It worked yesterday AND I managed to tell her what we're doing not giving options for anything else. Who knew lol?
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CreepyPants
@CreepyPants
20 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 233 · Posts: 8226 · Topics: 348
Posted by xygeneration
Trying to move on one step at a time. I miss him, but I know im better off without him. Why miss someone who doesn't care about you?

Jogging, positive thoughts and if I feel that I miss him I think of why im not with him.



my pisces moon is going into overdrive here, luv.

take care not to dwell, but allowing yourself to feel is still a beautiful thing. what mmm said is real talk. time fixes all things. it will, i promise.

one of the hardest things about splitting with someone is coping with your ideas of what they are feeling. it's hard to let go of that sense of responsibility of the other person's emotions. whatever they may be. but that is one of the things that you have to do in order for you yourself to move on.

once you let go of that sense of care of what they are feeling, then look to your own feelings and reconcile with them.

these things will give your heart and mind the greatest sense of peace. and you deserve that.

every new day will get easier. and do not forget to live. life and time is precious... allow yourself to love again soon.
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CreepyPants
@CreepyPants
20 Years5,000+ Posts

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all those feelings are completely natural and normal. but like i said... allow yourself to feel them... just dont dwell in them for too long.

let these feelings run their course for a few days. there's no rush to "turn them off" right away, as much as they suck. it IS better that you let it out now. but then allow yourself to heal. you have to be proactive about mending your own broken heart by being positive. it will take effort, but keep your chin up 🙂 it will get better and you will heal. and you will find someone who will be amazing to you, that you'll be head over heels for. those are great things to look forward to.
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CreepyPants
@CreepyPants
20 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 233 · Posts: 8226 · Topics: 348
and dont ever feel like giving is wrong. it is never wrong. giving hurts when it doesnt end well, but that doesnt make it wrong. giving is loving.

you were hopeful that treating him as the man you wanted him to be might help him become it. you focused on the good because that is positive and encouraging. if there were other things you come to realize you should have done, dont regret not having done it. you have to forgive yourself for it and learn and promise yourself you'll be better in the future.

these are the kinds of things you need to come to terms with in order to stay positive and to heal. let your heart be light. *hugs*
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lnana04
@lnana04
15 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 2 · Posts: 8822 · Topics: 132
Posted by capgirl69
lnana- hugs! Sounds like a difficult time for you.



Thanks for the hugs! My Cap friend pulled thru for me this morning and offered for me to stay at his place on the days I need to work since its up the street from him AND we work together. Too sweet

Ive calmed down just a bit. Ive realized for a while now that Im so much drama on here lol. If it ever seems like Im posting too much drama just keep in mind Im Leo lite(rising and moon) lol.

I hope the rest of my day will be better.
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TigerCap
@TigerCap
12 Years1,000+ PostsCapricorn

Comments: 14 · Posts: 1482 · Topics: 13
I love this weekly horoscope for Caps:
"While there is still a lot of tension in the air this week, you're getting off lightly compared to some of your cosmic mates, especially if you refuse to sweat the small stuff and see this more as an opportunity in disguise. The pressure is caused by a series of Saturn oppositions and when the hard taskmaster of the cosmos is standing his ground and creating tension, we feel it. You have two things going for you. The first is that as Saturn is your ruling planet you know how to work with this energy, bringing out the mantra you were born with, which is that when the going gets tough, the tough get going. The other fact is who Mars is bullying and this time he's picking on the wrong planet, in the wrong place, for all this is likely to see is your romantic and creative passions fight back."



Also, I am about to send a break or bend message to a friend. She needs to get over her problem with me or kick my ass out.
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TigerCap
@TigerCap
12 Years1,000+ PostsCapricorn

Comments: 14 · Posts: 1482 · Topics: 13
Fun facts about hippos:
- Despite having an image as a docile creature dancing in a tutu it causes the most human fatalities of any creature in Africa. Mosquitos kill more but they cheat. It's the malaria parasite that kills.
- Hippos are closely related to whales. There are even indications that whales came from a hippo-like creature.
- Hippos have been filmed while hunting for prey. Deers and crocodiles are sometimes part of their diet.
- In times of scarcity hippos sometimes turn to cannibalism.
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truecap
@truecap
13 Years10,000+ Posts

Comments: 8 · Posts: 20090 · Topics: 685
Posted by xxoommmxxoo
All of a sudden i feel really stressed. I felt so good this morning but now stress about all the stuff i need to do. Wash my car, finish my house, workout, bills, i had a delay in money comming in until tuesday which irritated me. Work tomorrow. All of a sudden i feel overwhelmed. Its times like these that i pray, God lead me to put one in front of the other and do one thing at a time and count my blessings because i have so many.



I wish these were the only things I had to do. 🙂

Hope that makes you feel better.
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CreepyPants
@CreepyPants
20 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 233 · Posts: 8226 · Topics: 348
bout to unload...

i'm making honey bbq glazed salmon and carmelized onion and white truffle oil mashed potatoes paired with a riesling... and just so i'm clear, i'm sharing this to induce jealousy and astonishment.

i'm starting to resign myself to the possible truth that i may not be fit for marriage or long term relationships. i have the heart for it, but perhaps not the mind.

i'm not sure how i feel about that. is there any way i can be thrilled? seems a stretch, but seeing as how it's a possibility maybe i should work on being thrilled.
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StoicGoat
@StoicGoat
13 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 0 · Posts: 3217 · Topics: 32
You may need to work on your technique; I'm experiencing amusement rather than jealousy and astonishment. 😛

I like how you skip right over contentment and want to be thrilled. lol Ok, reasons to be thrilled...

10) You can wax and shave whatever you want whenever you want.
9) No need to worry about your looks or breath first thing in the morning.
8) You can spend as much time with your friends as you want.
7) No one will make fun of you for becoming emotional over a chick flick.
6) You can travel wherever you want whenever you want.
5) No need to worry about maternity leave throwing a monkey wrench in your career plans.
4) No one will nag you about what you spend your money on.
3) You'll never have to pretend to like your significant other's friends
2) You'll never have to pretend to like your significant other's family

and the numero uno reason why it's better to be single is... *drum role, please*

1) The remote will always be under your control!

I totally stole those from the interwebz, but whatever. The effort invested in originality seems foolish when compared to the luxurious sloth of plagiarism!