Dating an only child. Were they selfish?

Just curious.

My fiance is an only child. He isnt selfish at all, very caring and supportive. Lol if he was selfish he wouldnt be my fiance. Makes sense

Posted by ManilaVice
i only date middle children. great topic lol i've been talking about this with people for weeks!

Yeah they were.

I'm an only child. My parents made an effort not to spoil me. But, I did have their full attention and I'm sure I got things that kids from big families didn't get. I don't see myself as selfish, but I've never really had to share anything until I got married and had kids of my own. I've always been curious from other's point of view whether I come across as spoiled or selfish...I do know I didn't learn how to stand up for myself or the art of confrontation until I got married. I didn't have to learn the art of conflict. People with siblings learn these skills from an early age.

I don't expect special treatment from people and I don't demand special privileges, etc. Sharing attention is a little hard on me I think...to be honest. But, I've learned to deal with it and not be offended by it.

Posted by ManilaVice
my cousin has this nutty pet peeve when it comes to dating and she's an only child. she has to be served by her date/ bf first before anyone else in the table. @_@

That's ridiculous. Hope she grows up eventually.

Yes, extremely so.

He was spoiled rotten though, his mother didn't want him to grow up. She stunted him emotionally so she would always feel needed. When we talked about him she would always shift the conversation back to when he was a child. I didn't notice how interesting their relationship was until we broke up and I took the time to analyze the relationship. Very manipulative, not much empathy, self-serving.

I probably won't date an only child, or the youngest child, again. Least not as a permanent endeavor. They all seem to have the same type of personality. However, if I were to find someone I really dig I wouldn't bare them from my life simply because of their birth order.

Posted by starwars
my buddy is an only child, he feels its okay to drop people out of the blue if he didnt like them. he just disappears lol. he got passive behavior. hes a sweet caring guy but he seem irresponsible even though he is not. he give off childish vibe. women usually think hes "adorable" even though he looks manly af. Lol! he get friendzoned a lot too!

ive dated the last child whos also a momma boy, he was nice, know how to respect women, he loves him mom, shes great cool lady who taught him how to be a man and overcome his insecurities the only con was his clinginess. he was only selfish when it comes on putting his security before anything else. great guy in general. can be responsible and serious when he wants to and can act like 5 when he wants to.

Is his name Zack LOL

Isn't the answer to that pretty obvious?

I've gotten called "too nice" multiple times /: when my parents had a bad day, there was only me to turn their attention to so..it has cons and it REALLY just depends on their personality more than ever. And what they experienced ofc.

..

btw I'm an only child.

Posted by SalamanderCandy
I've gotten called "too nice" multiple times /: when my parents had a bad day, there was only me to turn their attention to so..it has cons and it REALLY just depends on their personality more than ever. And what they experienced ofc.

..

btw I'm an only child.

Posted by ManilaVice

Posted by Rambunctious76
Just my opinion but it's usually mostly upbringing. I've met other only children who weren't selfish and entitled, and on the other hand just as many youngest children who were.

i never had a chance to be anything but selfish. only child leo moon! 😭

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Posted by asc_scorp1991
I am an only girl child.

I was slightly selfish , had feelings of entitlement and loved attention till early twenties. Also was jealous when others got attention if I thought they didnt deserve it.

But hard aspects in chart have taught me lessons and I am no longer like that (atleast I think so), at 24.

Posted by Rambunctious76

Posted by truecap
I'm an only child. My parents made an effort not to spoil me. But, I did have their full attention and I'm sure I got things that kids from big families didn't get. I don't see myself as selfish, but I've never really had to share anything until I got married and had kids of my own. I've always been curious from other's point of view whether I come across as spoiled or selfish...I do know I didn't learn how to stand up for myself or the art of confrontation until I got married. I didn't have to learn the art of conflict. People with siblings learn these skills from an early age.

I don't expect special treatment from people and I don't demand special privileges, etc. Sharing attention is a little hard on me I think...to be honest. But, I've learned to deal with it and not be offended by it.

+1 to this.

I'm an only child, and it was for that reason alone my parents made sure they didn't spoil me. If I wanted anything extra other than the basics, it came out from my own pocket. So I was taught the difference between needs and wants from a very early age 😈.

Attention wise, I was a loner - I preferred to be left on my own to handle things.

I almost always felt bad if I was given more than I needed, and I'm still that way.

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Not all only children are the same.

I'm an only child, don't think I ever dated an only child, or a middle one.

Dated first and last borns.

@OP & @faceroll- Yeah growing up I was the only child, and then a 9-10 year age gap between me and my two brothers. I have been told I am selfish and I wasn't that spoiled. Very rebellious though.

However I am least selfish when I like someone. And actually I have seen what selfish is all about with other people. Yeah kinda a turn off. So I share more now and compromise alot almost too much.

Posted by ManilaVice
not as much as those born last IMO.

So true

The last borns think they're always the cutest and get the most adoration and love smh, poison them

I think most only children eventually realize they'll continue to be forever alone if they don't put that entitlement to check

Posted by ManilaVice

Posted by SassyKiwi

Posted by ManilaVice
not as much as those born last IMO.

So true

The last borns think they're always the cutest and get the most adoration and love smh, poison them

I think most only children eventually realize they'll continue to be forever alone if they don't put that entitlement to check

wut?

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I'm talking about the only child who grew up constantly getting handed everything without much conflict. It's just easy to assume an only child person had entitlement issues at some point.

Someone might've done a study on how well only child adults cope with relationships than those who grew up with siblings. And I think I came across something mentioning it can be more difficult because of a lack of experience from sibling conflict dynamics.

interesting topic. i have only been able to be in relationships with the eldest child and i'm the youngest with one brother. further, i seem to relate (emotionally) much easier with men who have younger sister(s).

Posted by ManilaVice

Posted by Libralula

Posted by ManilaVice
there's also a difference between an only child and an only child of divorce. someone told me leonardo dicaprio was the textbook only child of divorce male.

What's the only child of divorce like?

http://www.divorce360.com/divorce-articles/after-divorce/parenting/single-parenting-divorce-and-the-only-child.aspx?artid=134

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Thanks for this...