Deedee75
@Deedee75
13 Years
Comments: 1003 · Posts: 378 · Topics: 14
Help: I'm sabotaging a good thing
Posted by emeraldgem
There's something about LDR's that bring out the crazy. At least for me - LOL! It feels like everything is under a microscope - I have to watch what I say, how I say it. When we would see each other the pressure was on to be perfect - make love (perfectly), don't argue. I think it's just the dynamic because I never act like that in a "normal" relationship. It's just the stress of not being with them and everything rachets up to unattainable levels when you are. I just think it's the stress of it that makes me (and maybe you) lash out. Calm the fuck down and be nice to the poor schmuck. Take this as your challenge!
I think you hit it.
I truly hate this distance. In a real relationship we can talk and see eachother a few times a week and it's fine. With the distance, it is constant contact and if he misses a "good morning", I'm pissed. It brings out insecurities.
Posted by emeraldgem
How temporary is the long-distance thing? When will you guys be moving?
Just value what you have and nurture it. But, yeah - that stress will fuck you up and make you say/do stuff like you don't even recognize yourself.
We both have kids that our in 11th grade. We will move after they graduate in summer 2021. Because we travel for work and are in the same industry, we will never go more than 60 days without seeing eachother. Spring/Summer will more frequent.
Posted by IMightBeElle
What happened to the Aqua boss?
It slowly and unremarkably fizzled out. He's still my boss and my friend but he is married to work.
Sag just popped up unexpectedly and it was love at first sight
Posted by Cachet
It's one thing to recognize insecurities and another to not act on them.
In a way, it's a good thing that they are brought to the surface. They clearly were always there, you're just aware of them now. Figure out where they come from and talk to him about them. Maybe you'll come up with something together to help. You still have to work on them on your own, though. And you need to learn to distract yourself.
I poured my heart out to him.
If he hasn't run yet, he never will lol
Posted by IMightBeEllePosted by Deedee75Posted by IMightBeElle
What happened to the Aqua boss?
It slowly and unremarkably fizzled out. He's still my boss and my friend but he is married to work.
Sag just popped up unexpectedly and it was love at first sight
Okay, got.it...was just confused.
Where are the securities coming from? Has he done anything to warrant them or are you just acting on them for whatever reason?
I can make them up in my head for no real reason....that's why I'm asking. #AriesMoonProblemsclick to expand
He has done absolutely nothing wrong. I'm just a psycho
Posted by emeraldgem
Keep your communication very open. Like, I would even discuss how irrationally I've been feeling WITH him. And ask him how he's doing also. Maybe he has unvoiced frustrations he may want to talk to you about. You need to be really strong as a couple and it sounds like you are. But you are going to have to channel your inner Gemini and c o m m u n i c a t e. Because really, that's all you have - and if that goes off the rails.........not good.
Yeah, that's what brought me here. He told me that I'm amazing and in person everything is great but by text, he feels like he's in eggshells because he never knows what is going to offend me.
My Gem rising with his Gem moon.
Posted by CachetPosted by Deedee75Posted by Cachet
It's one thing to recognize insecurities and another to not act on them.
In a way, it's a good thing that they are brought to the surface. They clearly were always there, you're just aware of them now. Figure out where they come from and talk to him about them. Maybe you'll come up with something together to help. You still have to work on them on your own, though. And you need to learn to distract yourself.
I poured my heart out to him.
If he hasn't run yet, he never will lol
And did you come up with something? Or did you just leave it at that? Did pouring your heart out help?click to expand
He told me that we knew this time apart would be difficult but things will eventually be more consistent. He also said that put constant pressure on him without even realizing it. I asked him to tell me how so I can try and correct it.
Posted by emeraldgem
There's something about LDR's that bring out the crazy. At least for me - LOL! It feels like everything is under a microscope - I have to watch what I say, how I say it. When we would see each other the pressure was on to be perfect - make love (perfectly), don't argue. I think it's just the dynamic because I never act like that in a "normal" relationship. It's just the stress of not being with them and everything rachets up to unattainable levels when you are. I just think it's the stress of it that makes me (and maybe you) lash out. Calm the fuck down and be nice to the poor schmuck. Take this as your challenge!
Lmao at poor shmuck...
I told you before...are you -me?
Same shit! Exactly.
Listen to this though...
I used to be needy, clingy, annoying and he always said I weren’t.
Then last week when we were together I’ve thrown fit because he didn’t do some shit the way I wanted and he went all out explaining that he does love me and he understand and he didn’t wanted to meet my daughter that week it he did after all and everything was fine. And he usually doesn’t give in like that...
So after all that he is better and softer and I am freaking out anyway...like why? What is going on?
Lmao
I HATE LDR though I see benefits but all and all not bad at all - you right - it’s fucked up arrangement but if there is no way to change it - you learn how to deal with it but it’s not easy.
Is yours have changes in near future? How soon?
Posted by GemitatiPosted by emeraldgem
There's something about LDR's that bring out the crazy. At least for me - LOL! It feels like everything is under a microscope - I have to watch what I say, how I say it. When we would see each other the pressure was on to be perfect - make love (perfectly), don't argue. I think it's just the dynamic because I never act like that in a "normal" relationship. It's just the stress of not being with them and everything rachets up to unattainable levels when you are. I just think it's the stress of it that makes me (and maybe you) lash out. Calm the fuck down and be nice to the poor schmuck. Take this as your challenge!
Lmao at poor shmuck...
I told you before...are you -me?
Same shit! Exactly.
Listen to this though...
I used to be needy, clingy, annoying and he always said I weren’t.
Then last week when we were together I’ve thrown fit because he didn’t do some shit the way I wanted and he went all out explaining that he does love me and he understand and he didn’t wanted to meet my daughter that week it he did after all and everything was fine. And he usually doesn’t give in like that...
So after all that he is better and softer and I am freaking out anyway...like why? What is going on?
Lmao
I HATE LDR though I see benefits but all and all not bad at all - you right - it’s fucked up arrangement but if there is no way to change it - you learn how to deal with it but it’s not easy.
Is yours have changes in near future? How soon?click to expand
22 months until we have our own place together.
Gem, we sound exactly alike.
Posted by emeraldgem
@Deedee75 - he sounds like a really great guy and those are hard to find nowadays. VALUE that and PROTECT that when the crazy train wants to drive thru your brain.
He is perfect for me.
Posted by CachetPosted by Deedee75Posted by CachetPosted by Deedee75Posted by Cachet
It's one thing to recognize insecurities and another to not act on them.
In a way, it's a good thing that they are brought to the surface. They clearly were always there, you're just aware of them now. Figure out where they come from and talk to him about them. Maybe you'll come up with something together to help. You still have to work on them on your own, though. And you need to learn to distract yourself.
I poured my heart out to him.
If he hasn't run yet, he never will lol
And did you come up with something? Or did you just leave it at that? Did pouring your heart out help?
He told me that we knew this time apart would be difficult but things will eventually be more consistent. He also said that put constant pressure on him without even realizing it. I asked him to tell me how so I can try and correct it.
Hmm. I don't know the whole story but based on what you said above and that he feels like he has to walk on eggshells around you...it doesn't sound good, to me.
It brings me back to my original piece of advice to focus on other things. Give each other space to breathe.
And that you possibly need to get a handle on your emotions, especially if and when he says something you don't like. Not being able to express yourself freely in a intimate relationship, gets old and suffocating real fast.click to expand
I over analyze ever word of every text.
Posted by Deedee75Posted by IMightBeEllePosted by Deedee75Posted by IMightBeElle
What happened to the Aqua boss?
It slowly and unremarkably fizzled out. He's still my boss and my friend but he is married to work.
Sag just popped up unexpectedly and it was love at first sight
Okay, got.it...was just confused.
Where are the securities coming from? Has he done anything to warrant them or are you just acting on them for whatever reason?
I can make them up in my head for no real reason....that's why I'm asking. #AriesMoonProblems
He has done absolutely nothing wrong. I'm just a psychoclick to expand
🤝
So far this thread showing that GOOD MEN DO EXIST! I always new that but so much negative shit posted here...
I am also just psycho and sometimes I can’t even remember what happened...
Luckily he knows that women at least half crazy...lol
Posted by IMightBeEllePosted by Deedee75Posted by IMightBeEllePosted by Deedee75Posted by IMightBeElle
What happened to the Aqua boss?
It slowly and unremarkably fizzled out. He's still my boss and my friend but he is married to work.
Sag just popped up unexpectedly and it was love at first sight
Okay, got.it...was just confused.
Where are the securities coming from? Has he done anything to warrant them or are you just acting on them for whatever reason?
I can make them up in my head for no real reason....that's why I'm asking. #AriesMoonProblems
He has done absolutely nothing wrong. I'm just a psycho
LOL
Okay....then start with the texts....don't respond right away (to challenge your passive aggressiveness). Think on them for a bit before you respond...process the weird feelings first.
Stop caring about the "good morning" and "good night" texts....you will appreciate them more when you do receive them.
You poured your heart out, right? The next stage of that is feeling vulnerable and your scorpio bits are trying to run because we hate that shit 🤣😂🤣
So, give the scorp bits a new project to work on....controlling yourself. After awhile they will forget about the vulnerability aspect.click to expand
I'm going to print this out and tape it to my mirror lol
Posted by IMightBeEllePosted by Deedee75Posted by IMightBeEllePosted by Deedee75Posted by IMightBeElle
What happened to the Aqua boss?
It slowly and unremarkably fizzled out. He's still my boss and my friend but he is married to work.
Sag just popped up unexpectedly and it was love at first sight
Okay, got.it...was just confused.
Where are the securities coming from? Has he done anything to warrant them or are you just acting on them for whatever reason?
I can make them up in my head for no real reason....that's why I'm asking. #AriesMoonProblems
He has done absolutely nothing wrong. I'm just a psycho
LOL
Okay....then start with the texts....don't respond right away (to challenge your passive aggressiveness). Think on them for a bit before you respond...process the weird feelings first.
Stop caring about the "good morning" and "good night" texts....you will appreciate them more when you do receive them.
You poured your heart out, right? The next stage of that is feeling vulnerable and your scorpio bits are trying to run because we hate that shit 🤣😂🤣
So, give the scorp bits a new project to work on....controlling yourself. After awhile they will forget about the vulnerability aspect.click to expand
No way you letting him forget ‘good mornings’...
When he sends it it means he waking up thinking of you. If he doesn’t - what TF is he thinking about— 🧟♀️
Posted by Deedee75Posted by GemitatiPosted by emeraldgem
There's something about LDR's that bring out the crazy. At least for me - LOL! It feels like everything is under a microscope - I have to watch what I say, how I say it. When we would see each other the pressure was on to be perfect - make love (perfectly), don't argue. I think it's just the dynamic because I never act like that in a "normal" relationship. It's just the stress of not being with them and everything rachets up to unattainable levels when you are. I just think it's the stress of it that makes me (and maybe you) lash out. Calm the fuck down and be nice to the poor schmuck. Take this as your challenge!
Lmao at poor shmuck...
I told you before...are you -me?
Same shit! Exactly.
Listen to this though...
I used to be needy, clingy, annoying and he always said I weren’t.
Then last week when we were together I’ve thrown fit because he didn’t do some shit the way I wanted and he went all out explaining that he does love me and he understand and he didn’t wanted to meet my daughter that week it he did after all and everything was fine. And he usually doesn’t give in like that...
So after all that he is better and softer and I am freaking out anyway...like why? What is going on?
Lmao
I HATE LDR though I see benefits but all and all not bad at all - you right - it’s fucked up arrangement but if there is no way to change it - you learn how to deal with it but it’s not easy.
Is yours have changes in near future? How soon?
22 months until we have our own place together.
Gem, we sound exactly alike.click to expand
Yeah! LD phsyco bitches on a lose...😂😂😂
Place together sounds soooo cute!
Let’s have a forum...Countdown to HIS ass! Lol
Posted by CachetPosted by Deedee75Posted by CachetPosted by Deedee75Posted by CachetPosted by Deedee75Posted by Cachet
It's one thing to recognize insecurities and another to not act on them.
In a way, it's a good thing that they are brought to the surface. They clearly were always there, you're just aware of them now. Figure out where they come from and talk to him about them. Maybe you'll come up with something together to help. You still have to work on them on your own, though. And you need to learn to distract yourself.
I poured my heart out to him.
If he hasn't run yet, he never will lol
And did you come up with something? Or did you just leave it at that? Did pouring your heart out help?
He told me that we knew this time apart would be difficult but things will eventually be more consistent. He also said that put constant pressure on him without even realizing it. I asked him to tell me how so I can try and correct it.
Hmm. I don't know the whole story but based on what you said above and that he feels like he has to walk on eggshells around you...it doesn't sound good, to me.
It brings me back to my original piece of advice to focus on other things. Give each other space to breathe.
And that you possibly need to get a handle on your emotions, especially if and when he says something you don't like. Not being able to express yourself freely in a intimate relationship, gets old and suffocating real fast.
I over analyze ever word of every text.
Do you not trust him?click to expand
I trust him.
I'm not worried about other women and I never question that. I analyze stupid shit. Two nights ago he video called but last night it was a voice call. Does he not miss me? He told me he loves me, but not madly like usual. He didn't include a heart.
All absolutely ridiculous but that is what goes through my head.
Posted by GemitatiPosted by IMightBeEllePosted by Deedee75Posted by IMightBeEllePosted by Deedee75Posted by IMightBeElle
What happened to the Aqua boss?
It slowly and unremarkably fizzled out. He's still my boss and my friend but he is married to work.
Sag just popped up unexpectedly and it was love at first sight
Okay, got.it...was just confused.
Where are the securities coming from? Has he done anything to warrant them or are you just acting on them for whatever reason?
I can make them up in my head for no real reason....that's why I'm asking. #AriesMoonProblems
He has done absolutely nothing wrong. I'm just a psycho
LOL
Okay....then start with the texts....don't respond right away (to challenge your passive aggressiveness). Think on them for a bit before you respond...process the weird feelings first.
Stop caring about the "good morning" and "good night" texts....you will appreciate them more when you do receive them.
You poured your heart out, right? The next stage of that is feeling vulnerable and your scorpio bits are trying to run because we hate that shit 🤣😂🤣
So, give the scorp bits a new project to work on....controlling yourself. After awhile they will forget about the vulnerability aspect.
No way you letting him forget ‘good mornings’...
When he sends it it means he waking up thinking of you. If he doesn’t - what TF is he thinking about— 🧟♀️click to expand
Right.....
Posted by Deedee75Posted by CachetPosted by Deedee75Posted by CachetPosted by Deedee75Posted by Cachet
It's one thing to recognize insecurities and another to not act on them.
In a way, it's a good thing that they are brought to the surface. They clearly were always there, you're just aware of them now. Figure out where they come from and talk to him about them. Maybe you'll come up with something together to help. You still have to work on them on your own, though. And you need to learn to distract yourself.
I poured my heart out to him.
If he hasn't run yet, he never will lol
And did you come up with something? Or did you just leave it at that? Did pouring your heart out help?
He told me that we knew this time apart would be difficult but things will eventually be more consistent. He also said that put constant pressure on him without even realizing it. I asked him to tell me how so I can try and correct it.
Hmm. I don't know the whole story but based on what you said above and that he feels like he has to walk on eggshells around you...it doesn't sound good, to me.
It brings me back to my original piece of advice to focus on other things. Give each other space to breathe.
And that you possibly need to get a handle on your emotions, especially if and when he says something you don't like. Not being able to express yourself freely in a intimate relationship, gets old and suffocating real fast.
I over analyze ever word of every text.click to expand
I KNOW!!! 🤦♀️
Then I am shitting myself waiting for the reply biting my hands thinking...is that what everybody on dxp talking about? THE END— And reply comes ‘positive’ and I am going like...of course he loves me...acting like I always knew it...except my teeth marks on my knuckles steel bleeding...lmao
🤦♀️🧟♀️
Posted by Deedee75Posted by CachetPosted by Deedee75Posted by CachetPosted by Deedee75Posted by CachetPosted by Deedee75Posted by Cachet
It's one thing to recognize insecurities and another to not act on them.
In a way, it's a good thing that they are brought to the surface. They clearly were always there, you're just aware of them now. Figure out where they come from and talk to him about them. Maybe you'll come up with something together to help. You still have to work on them on your own, though. And you need to learn to distract yourself.
I poured my heart out to him.
If he hasn't run yet, he never will lol
And did you come up with something? Or did you just leave it at that? Did pouring your heart out help?
He told me that we knew this time apart would be difficult but things will eventually be more consistent. He also said that put constant pressure on him without even realizing it. I asked him to tell me how so I can try and correct it.
Hmm. I don't know the whole story but based on what you said above and that he feels like he has to walk on eggshells around you...it doesn't sound good, to me.
It brings me back to my original piece of advice to focus on other things. Give each other space to breathe.
And that you possibly need to get a handle on your emotions, especially if and when he says something you don't like. Not being able to express yourself freely in a intimate relationship, gets old and suffocating real fast.
I over analyze ever word of every text.
Do you not trust him?
I trust him.
I'm not worried about other women and I never question that. I analyze stupid shit. Two nights ago he video called but last night it was a voice call. Does he not miss me? He told me he loves me, but not madly like usual. He didn't include a heart.
All absolutely ridiculous but that is what goes through my head.click to expand
Yes! Yes! Yes! 😂😂😂
What about that stupid kissy face emoji that makes post heavily valuable? 🤦♀️
Is he thinking about us not making it?
Why didn’t he say ‘my love’?
Why did he texted ‘I love you too?’ Just because I said it? Or he does love me?🤔
Why did he texted ‘I love you’ out of blue? Is he feeling guilty about something? 🧐
What is he doing not texting me around noon as usually? Oh! He just did...hallelujah!
😂😂😂
Sounds familiar? 🤦♀️
Posted by CachetPosted by Deedee75Posted by CachetPosted by Deedee75Posted by CachetPosted by Deedee75Posted by CachetPosted by Deedee75Posted by Cachet
It's one thing to recognize insecurities and another to not act on them.
In a way, it's a good thing that they are brought to the surface. They clearly were always there, you're just aware of them now. Figure out where they come from and talk to him about them. Maybe you'll come up with something together to help. You still have to work on them on your own, though. And you need to learn to distract yourself.
I poured my heart out to him.
If he hasn't run yet, he never will lol
And did you come up with something? Or did you just leave it at that? Did pouring your heart out help?
He told me that we knew this time apart would be difficult but things will eventually be more consistent. He also said that put constant pressure on him without even realizing it. I asked him to tell me how so I can try and correct it.
Hmm. I don't know the whole story but based on what you said above and that he feels like he has to walk on eggshells around you...it doesn't sound good, to me.
It brings me back to my original piece of advice to focus on other things. Give each other space to breathe.
And that you possibly need to get a handle on your emotions, especially if and when he says something you don't like. Not being able to express yourself freely in a intimate relationship, gets old and suffocating real fast.
I over analyze ever word of every text.
Do you not trust him?
I trust him.
I'm not worried about other women and I never question that. I analyze stupid shit. Two nights ago he video called but last night it was a voice call. Does he not miss me? He told me he loves me, but not madly like usual. He didn't include a heart.
All absolutely ridiculous but that is what goes through my head.
I didn't mean trust when it comes to other women. Just trust when it comes to what it feels for you.
I may be totally wrong and off base but if you often question his feelings based on his actions towards you or lack thereof, I don't see it as fully trusting him.click to expand
Have you ever fell out of love not knowing why?
I had. Few times. So I think it’s that feeling that what if he changed his mind all of a sudden?
I’ve written once...
Please don’t leave me. Or if you do...tell me so I wouldn’t be wondering like an idiot. Deal?
He said: I am not going anywhere...and if someone will leave this rship it will be you...
Still...what IF? 🥵
Posted by Black-MambaPosted by GemitatiPosted by Black-Mamba
Is it cause he's black?
There we go again...🤦♀️
i knew your dumb ass was going to quote me
you're so easyclick to expand
I never said I wasn’t...lmao
Posted by Black-MambaPosted by Deedee75Posted by Black-Mamba
Is it cause he's black?
Lmao
My psycho does not discriminate
i got a laugh thoclick to expand
I'm in a sharing mood today.
He is the first black man that I have ever dated and I can say with all honesty that he is the best man that I have ever met.
Posted by Black-Mamba
I don't trust BLACK MEN.
1) Have you checked his bootyhole to make sure he's not gay
2) Any baby mothers
3) Any women on his social media
He has 3 kids with one woman. Youngest is 16. Divorced.
He has fb but not active. Just family on there.
Great work ethic, stand up guy, respectful, charming, very protective of me, alpha
Posted by Black-MambaPosted by Deedee75Posted by Black-Mamba
I don't trust BLACK MEN.
1) Have you checked his bootyhole to make sure he's not gay
2) Any baby mothers
3) Any women on his social media
He has 3 kids with one woman. Youngest is 16. Divorced.
He has fb but not active. Just family on there.
Great work ethic, stand up guy, respectful, charming, very protective of me, alpha
Is his BM white or black?click to expand
White
Posted by CachetPosted by GemitatiPosted by CachetPosted by Deedee75Posted by CachetPosted by Deedee75Posted by CachetPosted by Deedee75Posted by CachetPosted by Deedee75Posted by Cachet
It's one thing to recognize insecurities and another to not act on them.
In a way, it's a good thing that they are brought to the surface. They clearly were always there, you're just aware of them now. Figure out where they come from and talk to him about them. Maybe you'll come up with something together to help. You still have to work on them on your own, though. And you need to learn to distract yourself.
I poured my heart out to him.
If he hasn't run yet, he never will lol
And did you come up with something? Or did you just leave it at that? Did pouring your heart out help?
He told me that we knew this time apart would be difficult but things will eventually be more consistent. He also said that put constant pressure on him without even realizing it. I asked him to tell me how so I can try and correct it.
Hmm. I don't know the whole story but based on what you said above and that he feels like he has to walk on eggshells around you...it doesn't sound good, to me.
It brings me back to my original piece of advice to focus on other things. Give each other space to breathe.
And that you possibly need to get a handle on your emotions, especially if and when he says something you don't like. Not being able to express yourself freely in a intimate relationship, gets old and suffocating real fast.
I over analyze ever word of every text.
Do you not trust him?
I trust him.
I'm not worried about other women and I never question that. I analyze stupid shit. Two nights ago he video called but last night it was a voice call. Does he not miss me? He told me he loves me, but not madly like usual. He didn't include a heart.
All absolutely ridiculous but that is what goes through my head.
I didn't mean trust when it comes to other women. Just trust when it comes to what it feels for you.
I may be totally wrong and off base but if you often question his feelings based on his actions towards you or lack thereof, I don't see it as fully trusting him.
Have you ever fell out of love not knowing why?
I had. Few times. So I think it’s that feeling that what if he changed his mind all of a sudden?
I’ve written once...
Please don’t leave me. Or if you do...tell me so I wouldn’t be wondering like an idiot. Deal?
He said: I am not going anywhere...and if someone will leave this rship it will be you...
Still...what IF? 🥵
That's pretty much my point. He may not be doing anything for her to question him, but something scares her anyway. Thing is, it has nothing to do with him. The insecurities we talked about at the beginning of the thread.click to expand
It's not him at all. It's all me.
Cliff notes
Bad marriage
Followed by a 7 year relationship that ended with him ghosting me.
I'm damaged
Posted by Black-MambaPosted by Deedee75Posted by Black-MambaPosted by Deedee75Posted by Black-Mamba
I don't trust BLACK MEN.
1) Have you checked his bootyhole to make sure he's not gay
2) Any baby mothers
3) Any women on his social media
He has 3 kids with one woman. Youngest is 16. Divorced.
He has fb but not active. Just family on there.
Great work ethic, stand up guy, respectful, charming, very protective of me, alpha
Is his BM white or black?
White
Ok then I don't think you should be worrying, it seems he's already culturally adjusted to white women and would even commit to one long term. That's a good sign.click to expand
They got pregnant in highschool and he stuck around. That's better than most men.
It is naturally to be more demanding when you are not physically near your partner. Almost all women I know, generally become a little more attention seeking when the partner isn't close by, myself included. You typically get relationship affirmation that everything is okay while in person, so you don't need to be "told" it to feel it. But when the person is further, the communication needs to increase to have that affirmation.
Nothing wrong with it, just acknowledge it, and tell him so. He will understand and act accordingly.
Nothing wrong with it, just acknowledge it, and tell him so. He will understand and act accordingly.
Posted by Black-MambaPosted by Deedee75Posted by Black-MambaPosted by Deedee75Posted by Black-MambaPosted by Deedee75Posted by Black-Mamba
I don't trust BLACK MEN.
1) Have you checked his bootyhole to make sure he's not gay
2) Any baby mothers
3) Any women on his social media
He has 3 kids with one woman. Youngest is 16. Divorced.
He has fb but not active. Just family on there.
Great work ethic, stand up guy, respectful, charming, very protective of me, alpha
Is his BM white or black?
White
Ok then I don't think you should be worrying, it seems he's already culturally adjusted to white women and would even commit to one long term. That's a good sign.
They got pregnant in highschool and he stuck around. That's better than most men.
how soon after did he get with you after they broke up?click to expand
4 years
Oh, and sorry, didn't address the "bitchy" part. That's just you being stressed out from not getting the attention you need. Again, common too, just tell him you know you are being short with him, but it is just because you need him to put more attention into you, so you aren't so stressed and react in that way.
Posted by Black-MambaPosted by Deedee75Posted by Black-MambaPosted by Deedee75Posted by Black-MambaPosted by Deedee75Posted by Black-Mamba
I don't trust BLACK MEN.
1) Have you checked his bootyhole to make sure he's not gay
2) Any baby mothers
3) Any women on his social media
He has 3 kids with one woman. Youngest is 16. Divorced.
He has fb but not active. Just family on there.
Great work ethic, stand up guy, respectful, charming, very protective of me, alpha
Is his BM white or black?
White
Ok then I don't think you should be worrying, it seems he's already culturally adjusted to white women and would even commit to one long term. That's a good sign.
They got pregnant in highschool and he stuck around. That's better than most men.
how soon after did he get with you after they broke up?click to expand
There is definitely something different and special between us. It was instant even though neither of us were looking. He approached me immediately but it took a few days for me to agree to a date. By then, I was smitten.
Posted by seraph
Maybe not such a good thing.
Give yourself two weeks and see where le bitchayness goes. If it stays, you probably aren’t as satisfied as your thought you’d be and it’s time to re-evaluate. If it’s no longer there, then it’s just occasional griping, in which case the problem may lie elsewhere. You probably don’t have nearly as many problems as you think you do, anyway.
We really have no problems
I just miss him
And self sabotage
It's like I don't know how to handle a good relationship
Posted by nikkistar
It is naturally to be more demanding when you are not physically near your partner. Almost all women I know, generally become a little more attention seeking when the partner isn't close by, myself included. You typically get relationship affirmation that everything is okay while in person, so you don't need to be "told" it to feel it. But when the person is further, the communication needs to increase to have that affirmation.
Nothing wrong with it, just acknowledge it, and tell him so. He will understand and act accordingly.
^ this 💯
Me personally I need to be able to read body language etc and you can only really do that in person. Texts and the like can be so misconstrued...plus we get used to a certain way someone goes about things...even texts and so when something feels slightly off...our antennas perk up and we start analyzing every little thing...like oh yesterday it was all hearts and kisses and today it's just kisses. Guys don't think like this...they just do in the moment and never give it a second thought...but we are in tune with this shit and it's hard to tune out lol.
Now that you're mindful of it...just take some time to respond. He may also just be having an off day that day or busy atm. We really can mind fuck ourselves over nothing sometimes lol.
I'm attracted to ideas
And he's very driven and motivated. We are just starting to put a business together. It's exciting and we feed off of each other. He says that I'm the female version of him.
Maybe I'm terrified. We are both going all in.
He mentioned "when we get married" after 6 days.
He asked me about changing my last name to his after a month.
I don't doubt that he is the one but the commitmentphobe in me is panicking.
And he's very driven and motivated. We are just starting to put a business together. It's exciting and we feed off of each other. He says that I'm the female version of him.
Maybe I'm terrified. We are both going all in.
He mentioned "when we get married" after 6 days.
He asked me about changing my last name to his after a month.
I don't doubt that he is the one but the commitmentphobe in me is panicking.
Posted by LostinmyMind11Posted by nikkistar
It is naturally to be more demanding when you are not physically near your partner. Almost all women I know, generally become a little more attention seeking when the partner isn't close by, myself included. You typically get relationship affirmation that everything is okay while in person, so you don't need to be "told" it to feel it. But when the person is further, the communication needs to increase to have that affirmation.
Nothing wrong with it, just acknowledge it, and tell him so. He will understand and act accordingly.
^ this 💯
Me personally I need to be able to read body language etc and you can only really do that in person. Texts and the like can be so misconstrued...plus we get used to a certain way someone goes about things...even texts and so when something feels slightly off...our antennas perk up and we start analyzing every little thing...like oh yesterday it was all hearts and kisses and today it's just kisses. Guys don't think like this...they just do in the moment and never give it a second thought...but we are in tune with this shit and it's hard to tune out lol.
Now that you're mindful of it...just take some time to respond. He may also just be having an off day that day or busy atm. We really can mind fuck ourselves over nothing sometimes lol.click to expand
Yup! We sure can.
I will drive myself crazy over nothing.
This is why I love this board. You all just calmed my crazy. Talking it out put things in perspective
Posted by Black-MambaPosted by Deedee75
I'm attracted to ideas
And he's very driven and motivated. We are just starting to put a business together. It's exciting and we feed off of each other. He says that I'm the female version of him.
Maybe I'm terrified. We are both going all in.
He mentioned "when we get married" after 6 days.
He asked me about changing my last name to his after a month.
I don't doubt that he is the one but the commitmentphobe in me is panicking.
it's good to take it slow and get to really know one anotherclick to expand
Look at our charts......nothing slow about either of us.
We both dove in head first.
Posted by greylaternPosted by Deedee75Posted by emeraldgem
There's something about LDR's that bring out the crazy. At least for me - LOL! It feels like everything is under a microscope - I have to watch what I say, how I say it. When we would see each other the pressure was on to be perfect - make love (perfectly), don't argue. I think it's just the dynamic because I never act like that in a "normal" relationship. It's just the stress of not being with them and everything rachets up to unattainable levels when you are. I just think it's the stress of it that makes me (and maybe you) lash out. Calm the fuck down and be nice to the poor schmuck. Take this as your challenge!
I think you hit it.
I truly hate this distance. In a real relationship we can talk and see eachother a few times a week and it's fine. With the distance, it is constant contact and if he misses a "good morning", I'm pissed. It brings out insecurities.
Have you considered you straight up miss him and your acting out?
Texting is ok but impersonal. May not be enough. Have you considered FaceTime in a shared activity like watching the same movie. Just something more engaging.click to expand
I miss him like crazy.
Different time zones suck too. When we are apart but in the same timezone it's a bit easier to catch up. 3 hour difference atm
Posted by seraphPosted by Deedee75Posted by seraph
Maybe not such a good thing.
Give yourself two weeks and see where le bitchayness goes. If it stays, you probably aren’t as satisfied as your thought you’d be and it’s time to re-evaluate. If it’s no longer there, then it’s just occasional griping, in which case the problem may lie elsewhere. You probably don’t have nearly as many problems as you think you do, anyway.
We really have no problems
I just miss him
And self sabotage
It's like I don't know how to handle a good relationship
Sure, hang in there and see it through. Time will tell (it did for all the others, didn’t it.)
But relationship or not, you were there to see all of it. All those past relationships... some were good, some not so good. Yet here you are. The one constant in all this is you. Happy, sad, mad, glad. What’s the difference. You’ve seen it all. And what does that tell you? That you’ll be OK. 👍click to expand
Thank you for this
Posted by Deedee75
I'm attracted to ideas
And he's very driven and motivated. We are just starting to put a business together. It's exciting and we feed off of each other. He says that I'm the female version of him.
Maybe I'm terrified. We are both going all in.
He mentioned "when we get married" after 6 days.
He asked me about changing my last name to his after a month.
I don't doubt that he is the one but the commitmentphobe in me is panicking.
When you know you know. He sees what he has standing in front of him. Good luck though with the craziness.
He just called to say goodnight.
I tell him that I don't want him to ever feel pressured and to let me know if I do.
Alot of my humor and sarcasm doesn't transfer well to text so what may be cute in person is bitchy in text. Example is yesterday I told him that I would call him after work and he replied "k". I think that I'm being funny and replied, "really, it is that difficult to type the o".
He took that as me being upset but if he heard my voice he would know that I said it with a smile.
I tell him that I don't want him to ever feel pressured and to let me know if I do.
Alot of my humor and sarcasm doesn't transfer well to text so what may be cute in person is bitchy in text. Example is yesterday I told him that I would call him after work and he replied "k". I think that I'm being funny and replied, "really, it is that difficult to type the o".
He took that as me being upset but if he heard my voice he would know that I said it with a smile.
Posted by bumboklatt
Not to be a buzzkill and certainly not judging the realities but based purely off astrology, that synastry is kinda off. Mars to mars is great but mars venus is the real deal. Sun signs are off too. Also cant say more without the houses
I ran both of our birthdates/times through astroseek and it gave the best compatibility report that I have ever received with anyone. Alot to do with houses, most likely.
Posted by bumboklatt
Not to be a buzzkill and certainly not judging the realities but based purely off astrology, that synastry is kinda off. Mars to mars is great but mars venus is the real deal. Sun signs are off too. Also cant say more without the houses
I am not sure why this post took place...there aren’t perfect synastries and if woman is happy in love - I would think 5 times before I told her my opinion about her rship. Unless she is complaining. And she isn’t.
So this post sounded to me like...don’t be so happy...type of post. Why bother?
Posted by bumboklattPosted by GemitatiPosted by bumboklatt
Not to be a buzzkill and certainly not judging the realities but based purely off astrology, that synastry is kinda off. Mars to mars is great but mars venus is the real deal. Sun signs are off too. Also cant say more without the houses
I am not sure why this post took place...there aren’t perfect synastries and if woman is happy in love - I would think 5 times before I told her my opinion about her rship. Unless she is complaining. And she isn’t.
So this post sounded to me like...don’t be so happy...type of post. Why bother?
Yeah i agree except i obviously wouldnt think 5 times before saying it lol. But i said at the beginning i am not judging feelings only astrologyclick to expand
You can say that again but saying what you said feels a lot like spit in a face.
You two in love...? Hmmm...your synastry suck though...
THANKS! It was a ‘support’ people in love can live without...don’t you think so? Maybe you should think 5 times? 🤦♀️😂
Posted by bumboklattPosted by GemitatiPosted by bumboklattPosted by GemitatiPosted by bumboklatt
Not to be a buzzkill and certainly not judging the realities but based purely off astrology, that synastry is kinda off. Mars to mars is great but mars venus is the real deal. Sun signs are off too. Also cant say more without the houses
I am not sure why this post took place...there aren’t perfect synastries and if woman is happy in love - I would think 5 times before I told her my opinion about her rship. Unless she is complaining. And she isn’t.
So this post sounded to me like...don’t be so happy...type of post. Why bother?
Yeah i agree except i obviously wouldnt think 5 times before saying it lol. But i said at the beginning i am not judging feelings only astrology
You can say that again but saying what you said feels a lot like spit in a face.
You two in love...? Hmmm...your synastry suck though...
THANKS! It was a ‘support’ people in love can live without...don’t you think so? Maybe you should think 5 times? 🤦♀️😂
I will think 5 times and the 6th time i will remember gemitaticlick to expand
It was a very mature decision! 👍
Join the Conversation. Explore Yourself. Connect with Others.
Discover insights, swap stories, and find people. dxpnet is where experiences turn into understanding.
Create Your Free Account →Related Topics
Pisces
Scorpio
Gemini
Gemini or Scorpio?
When is yours?
♏️
https://media.giphy.com/media/ImKT11uLh1e6I/giphy.gif
SCORPIOOOOOOOSSSS IT’S OUR TIMEEEEE
🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
I have a scorpio bracelet that covers my hand and I’ll probably wear it all month lol.
Anyway Happy Birthday to all of us 😊
Sun-Sag
Moon-Gem
Rising-Scorp
Mars-Scorp
Venus-Sag
Mercury-Scorp
Well he’s not my BF yet. So we’ve known each other since 2009. Around the same time I became acquaintances with a girl who was close to one of my friends. Fast forward to now and me and scorp decide to take each other seriously and he lets me know that h
I am in love with a Scorpio. We have this deep connection - more like spiritual connection and we don't have to say much but I know what he's thinking or how he feels...I feel his love.
There are so many unexplainable incidents that I have experienced
Do Scorpio’s have a psychic connection with people they care about ?
Example, do you feel or sense anything from other people? Especially a crush?
You could be living life and all of a sudden feel or sense something (certain feelings of anger, lust, lov
I don’t know when it happened but right now I feel so unhappy with my life. Looking back on my marriage that failed and early life I feel like made nothing but mistakes. I look at other people’s life and they are so happy and well adjusted but I’m just ba
Soooo I was talking to this Scorpio for about two weeks (not long at all) him 24 and me 25 (I’m a Taurus) long story short, I expressed to him about how some of his actions were showing signs of disinterest. I was just trying my to get better understandi
Okay fine I asked for his birthday! Lol and ran his chart ... it’s just so tempting.
What do you think about this combo anyway?
Him:
Scorpio sun
Leo moon
Sag Mercury
Cap Venus
Scorpio mars
Me:Sag sun
Aqua moon
Cap Mercury
Cap Venus
Cap Mars
Any suggestions for - in my opinion - scorpionic movies?
Looking for something with intense romance, how ever stupid it may be. Things like Twilight and 50 Shades is welcome. And also the better stuff like Drive and Inception.
Is this part of the whole death and rebirth Scorpio psyche?! Or just games and i need to walk away and stand my ground?
So I’d like to say that my Scorpio and I have come a long way since my previous posts, but we havent lol. It’s good and then it’s not
?
So I have a female cousin who happens to be a Scorpio. She's married and has 2 kids. I noticed something about her. She used to never pay attention to me at all even though we are cousins. I didn't exist for her and ever since I started posting pictures o
Im (scorpio) getting very confused by a male (virgo) colleague of mine. We didn't have the best start to our relationship and i have to admit i was a cookiemonster. However we have gone past that.
We have become really close at work and will message, han
Which sign falls in your 7th how do you feel it affects your relationships?
Mine is in Scorpio and is loaded.....learning through others.
Does anyone have it in Capricorn and if so, how're you with relationships, i.e. how important are they to you?
Tha
I love the Scorpio/Virgo brand of humour, Virgos Jack Black, Reece Sheersmith and Scorpio Dylan Moran crack me up. I’ve noticed that some of th people here on Dxp who make me laugh, @Lostinmymind, @nikkistar, @TheRabbit and @Alexscscorpio have, I think,
Cap + pisces= no growth. Basically two people trying to portray an image of love to each other. Nothing to learn total stagnation.
Cap+ Cancer= they dont even click. Relationship built on desperation.
Cap+ scorpio= too vindictive
Virgo ÷ cancer= no st
A Scorpio friend and I got into a big fight a month ago... I lashed out from a dark place and she said we need space. I agreed. After a few weeks I wrote her a letter highlighting the strength she has given me as a friend and how much I appreciated our ti
Me:Scorp sun, Mercury, Aries moon, Libra Venus, Cancer Mars, Gem rising
Synastry is perfect. We click on everything
We are temporarily long distance, only seeing each other for a week every two months until we can move.
I'm not needy and bitchy but I've been acting needy and bitchy. Why am I self sabotaging a good thing?
He is perfect. But if he doesnt text the right thing, I throw a passive agressive comment. I am not even upset, I just say it to say it.