Centaur12
@Centaur12
5 Years500+ Posts
Comments: 9 · Posts: 628 · Topics: 23
Me and Gem broke up.
This is what I told her--- I am here for you when ever you need me never forget it, I love you for who you are and everything that comes with you I do not wish to tie you down I wish to explore the world with you I want to explore everything life has to give with you I want to experience all new things together. You are free to do whatever you want I love that you are an independent person. I understand you and I know you find it hard in making decisions this I love about you because I want to be the person to help you with them. I filled you with doubt because of my suspicious behaviour. I know you was bored of hearing the same stuff from me that person is long gone. I will prove to you I am more fun this time and I am not all work and no play I can prove this to you.
I know you need time to clam down im not going to give you a hard time all I wish is that we can date like its the first time when your ready. I hope you have a lovely day in work go smash it like I know you can speak soon xx
She replied with this --- Im going to be totally honest with you, i still feel the same as last night but we have a holiday booked so im hoping to see if that would change us and go well and become best friends again. A relationship where we are as one and like you said dare each other day by day. Im super busy in work so sorry for the not so long message. I hope you're having a good day xx
What is happening here really anyone know can anyone give me advice for the last time please ?
I know you need time to clam down im not going to give you a hard time all I wish is that we can date like its the first time when your ready. I hope you have a lovely day in work go smash it like I know you can speak soon xx
She replied with this --- Im going to be totally honest with you, i still feel the same as last night but we have a holiday booked so im hoping to see if that would change us and go well and become best friends again. A relationship where we are as one and like you said dare each other day by day. Im super busy in work so sorry for the not so long message. I hope you're having a good day xx
What is happening here really anyone know can anyone give me advice for the last time please ?
I offered advice a long time ago to look towards her actions, but you always seem to want to corner her into saying what you want to hear.
Both of you need to grow up and be adults, especially with kids involved.
2 whiney adults, playing tit for tat and punishing all the kids from a family dynamic, after years of being around each other, is super childish and practically unfit.
Both of you need to grow up and be adults, especially with kids involved.
2 whiney adults, playing tit for tat and punishing all the kids from a family dynamic, after years of being around each other, is super childish and practically unfit.
What did you do everyday for 18 months before you started relying on DXP for answers?
Posted by saggurl88
What did you do everyday for 18 months before you started relying on DXP for answers?
Lived a happy life before. I have spoken directly to @Easha23000us for advice.
Gem told me she wants to start fresh on her own.
Well then so be it !! I am going to let her go myself when I speak with her tomorrow I am going to tell her to her face that she wants to start fresh on her own I think its a good idea as well because I also want to start fresh on my own is exactly what I am going to do tomorrow.
Posted by Centaur12Posted by saggurl88
What did you do everyday for 18 months before you started relying on DXP for answers?
Lived a happy life before. I have spoken directly to @Easha23000us for advice.
Gem told me she wants to start fresh on her own.
Well then so be it !! I am going to let her go myself when I speak with her tomorrow I am going to tell her to her face that she wants to start fresh on her own I think its a good idea as well because I also want to start fresh on my own is exactly what I am going to do tomorrow.click to expand
And I am cutting all communication off with her and sticking to it because she doesn't respect me and deep down thinks she can come and go when she feels like it fuck that good luck to here.
Posted by Centaur12Posted by saggurl88
What did you do everyday for 18 months before you started relying on DXP for answers?
Lived a happy life before. I have spoken directly to @Easha23000us for advice.
Gem told me she wants to start fresh on her own.
Well then so be it !! I am going to let her go myself when I speak with her tomorrow I am going to tell her to her face that she wants to start fresh on her own I think its a good idea as well because I also want to start fresh on my own is exactly what I am going to do tomorrow.click to expand
Well the only way to stop a roller coaster is to get off.
I don't think it's over at all, but good luck to you anyways.
Maybe this will help with clarity in what went wrong for so long if you two can actually follow through.
You two are very good a projecting and breaking up- To bad its not the opposite- Accepting and staying together. Once you guys figure out how to do this, it will be smooth sailing.
Posted by Centaur12Posted by saggurl88
What did you do everyday for 18 months before you started relying on DXP for answers?
Lived a happy life before. I have spoken directly to @Easha23000us for advice.
Gem told me she wants to start fresh on her own.
Well then so be it !! I am going to let her go myself when I speak with her tomorrow I am going to tell her to her face that she wants to start fresh on her own I think its a good idea as well because I also want to start fresh on my own is exactly what I am going to do tomorrow.click to expand
Jesus. The mere fact that you feel you need to meet her "face to face" to state the obvious only highlights that you're still playing this very bizarre exhausting game. Just live your life, why the hell do you need to meet her to tell her you're going to live your life and "want a fresh start" if not to try to get an emotional reaction from her? Dude, you're both full of it smh....
Lol. It hasn't even been 24 hours and she's already planning the next off/on again cycle:
Like I stated above, both full of it.
Posted by Centaur12
She replied with this --- Im going to be totally honest with you, i still feel the same as last night but we have a holiday booked so im hoping to see if that would change us and go well and become best friends again. A relationship where we are as one and like you said ...
Like I stated above, both full of it.
Omg seriously. She can’t get past it & that’s all that matters. Otherwise you will be torturing each other endlessly.
She has told me she wants a fresh start on her own yet again has said do I want to see her.
I am not playing games I am having games played on me.
She has said I want to see how we go until the holiday and that is in 2 weeks time.
She said she cannot bond with my children because I reminds her of my ex partner and she feels like she is giving my ex partner her own time when she see my kids she has a bad day.
She said this is because of the year we have had together where my ex has been in the back ground.
But her ex who she has 2 children with has also been in the back ground and you don't see me not bonding with her children I have her children for her when she goes out I cook them tea I put the to bed read them a story etc play games with them go on holiday with them all the stuff you should do.
She doesn't even have my children in her own house.
I believe she doesn't want me but doesn't want anyone else to have me either.
I have stuck in there hoping that it will change as I love her but it hasn't at all.
She had been ignoring me on the night times after reading my messages then denied reading them when it's completely obvious that she did as its right in front of me.
She been playing me big time and I have gone back to her eachtime.
No more of it now ima tell her that she wants a fresh start then I think its a good idea I won't text her I won't call her I will ignore her.
She came into my life instantly trying to control it my ex was around my family because that's there grand children there was no other reason she was no threat to her yet she kept pushing saying get rid of her out your family and I told my family this and they said they are there own people and they want to see the children and they have a relationship with my ex of 9 years.
So my partner Gem argued with my family members over this and now she uses this against me saying to me after the year I have had with your family blah blah blah but wait she has forgotten that her ex was round her house smashing the door in saying let me in and threatened me saying I am going to smash his face in and put him in car etc.
You do not see me acting in this way.
She tells me we have this amazing energy between us this bond she has never experienced then the next its I don't want to be with you lol.
She's playing me hard and I am falling for it everytime.
I am not playing games I am having games played on me.
She has said I want to see how we go until the holiday and that is in 2 weeks time.
She said she cannot bond with my children because I reminds her of my ex partner and she feels like she is giving my ex partner her own time when she see my kids she has a bad day.
She said this is because of the year we have had together where my ex has been in the back ground.
But her ex who she has 2 children with has also been in the back ground and you don't see me not bonding with her children I have her children for her when she goes out I cook them tea I put the to bed read them a story etc play games with them go on holiday with them all the stuff you should do.
She doesn't even have my children in her own house.
I believe she doesn't want me but doesn't want anyone else to have me either.
I have stuck in there hoping that it will change as I love her but it hasn't at all.
She had been ignoring me on the night times after reading my messages then denied reading them when it's completely obvious that she did as its right in front of me.
She been playing me big time and I have gone back to her eachtime.
No more of it now ima tell her that she wants a fresh start then I think its a good idea I won't text her I won't call her I will ignore her.
She came into my life instantly trying to control it my ex was around my family because that's there grand children there was no other reason she was no threat to her yet she kept pushing saying get rid of her out your family and I told my family this and they said they are there own people and they want to see the children and they have a relationship with my ex of 9 years.
So my partner Gem argued with my family members over this and now she uses this against me saying to me after the year I have had with your family blah blah blah but wait she has forgotten that her ex was round her house smashing the door in saying let me in and threatened me saying I am going to smash his face in and put him in car etc.
You do not see me acting in this way.
She tells me we have this amazing energy between us this bond she has never experienced then the next its I don't want to be with you lol.
She's playing me hard and I am falling for it everytime.
I believe her ex isn't that much of a bad person I think she played him hard like she's playing me right now.
He put up with it because he loved her like I do.
I think I need to get rid of her now because if I don't I think she will find someone else.
Let me break it down I have seen texts from him at the start of our relationship saying to her - There will be no more cuddling or kissing or anything when your lonely.
He has text saying can't believe what you done to me.
She told me at the start that she slept with him in the October and met me in the December.
She said they didn't finish having it as she stopped it I think that's a lie however that is not relevant.
The point is I think they was on and off until she met me and then got rid of him.
She could of even cheated on him who knows. Her response to his texts is - what because I don't want to be with a person who treated me like that smashing up my house getting drunk and walking out all weekend.
I think he didn't know how to handle her and he was driven to this so couldn't handle his own temper.
I will give you an example of what she said recently I told her on the evening that my friend text me about this new place saying we should go there I said yeah okay looks cool and he said yes think of the woman there. Now I completely ignored his text because that isn't like me. I told gem about it and she said did you reply to his text and I said no I didn't even entertain it and she asked why I didn't and I said because that isn't me as a person her reply was and because you have a partner as well right? And I said yes of course but you are looking it at the wrong way I am saying in general I am not like that she said you said that as if you was single and I said no don't let your insecuritys get the better of you she needs constant reasurence from me and then what she will do is try get me to apologise for not saying what she wanted to hear and then play me even more and get into a mood and dissconnect. Do you get what I am saying I know what I want to tell you guys I am just not brilliant at explaining it.
He put up with it because he loved her like I do.
I think I need to get rid of her now because if I don't I think she will find someone else.
Let me break it down I have seen texts from him at the start of our relationship saying to her - There will be no more cuddling or kissing or anything when your lonely.
He has text saying can't believe what you done to me.
She told me at the start that she slept with him in the October and met me in the December.
She said they didn't finish having it as she stopped it I think that's a lie however that is not relevant.
The point is I think they was on and off until she met me and then got rid of him.
She could of even cheated on him who knows. Her response to his texts is - what because I don't want to be with a person who treated me like that smashing up my house getting drunk and walking out all weekend.
I think he didn't know how to handle her and he was driven to this so couldn't handle his own temper.
I will give you an example of what she said recently I told her on the evening that my friend text me about this new place saying we should go there I said yeah okay looks cool and he said yes think of the woman there. Now I completely ignored his text because that isn't like me. I told gem about it and she said did you reply to his text and I said no I didn't even entertain it and she asked why I didn't and I said because that isn't me as a person her reply was and because you have a partner as well right? And I said yes of course but you are looking it at the wrong way I am saying in general I am not like that she said you said that as if you was single and I said no don't let your insecuritys get the better of you she needs constant reasurence from me and then what she will do is try get me to apologise for not saying what she wanted to hear and then play me even more and get into a mood and dissconnect. Do you get what I am saying I know what I want to tell you guys I am just not brilliant at explaining it.
Posted by saggurl88Posted by Centaur12Posted by saggurl88
What did you do everyday for 18 months before you started relying on DXP for answers?
Lived a happy life before. I have spoken directly to @Easha23000us for advice.
Gem told me she wants to start fresh on her own.
Well then so be it !! I am going to let her go myself when I speak with her tomorrow I am going to tell her to her face that she wants to start fresh on her own I think its a good idea as well because I also want to start fresh on my own is exactly what I am going to do tomorrow.
Well the only way to stop a roller coaster is to get off.
I don't think it's over at all, but good luck to you anyways.
Maybe this will help with clarity in what went wrong for so long if you two can actually follow through.
You two are very good a projecting and breaking up- To bad its not the opposite- Accepting and staying together. Once you guys figure out how to do this, it will be smooth sailing.click to expand
I have tried endless of times to accept and move on I have told her we need to let go of the past and rebuild let go of the insecuritys and move on and she had told me cannot move past the problem with when I have my children she feels like she's having them for my ex partner it's a load of rubbish.
Posted by PhoenixRisingPosted by Centaur12Posted by saggurl88
What did you do everyday for 18 months before you started relying on DXP for answers?
Lived a happy life before. I have spoken directly to @Easha23000us for advice.
Gem told me she wants to start fresh on her own.
Well then so be it !! I am going to let her go myself when I speak with her tomorrow I am going to tell her to her face that she wants to start fresh on her own I think its a good idea as well because I also want to start fresh on my own is exactly what I am going to do tomorrow.
Jesus. The mere fact that you feel you need to meet her "face to face" to state the obvious only highlights that you're still playing this very bizarre exhausting game. Just live your life, why the hell do you need to meet her to tell her you're going to live your life and "want a fresh start" if not to try to get an emotional reaction from her? Dude, you're both full of it smh....click to expand
I have stuff at her house that I want back this is why.
Posted by SagoxaPosted by Centaur12Posted by saggurl88
What did you do everyday for 18 months before you started relying on DXP for answers?
Lived a happy life before. I have spoken directly to @Easha23000us for advice.
Gem told me she wants to start fresh on her own.
Well then so be it !! I am going to let her go myself when I speak with her tomorrow I am going to tell her to her face that she wants to start fresh on her own I think its a good idea as well because I also want to start fresh on my own is exactly what I am going to do tomorrow.
Why you gotta wait until tomorrow to say that?
Are you expecting her to back down and beg? What happens if she doesnt? You still want to give her ultimatums after ultimatums until you get what you want?
What will you do if she's not budging? Change your strategy and then chase her again?
Just stop.
Think
You want in or out? And then stick to it.
The decision to end a relationship should be final because after weighing the pros and cons, the bad outweighs the good. Not for ultimatums, not to get what you want, not as a mean of power.
Right now youre making a decision because youre angry.. it baffles me reading ur previous post that after 2 years of relationship, her being online and not replying to you becomes this HUGE of a problem...click to expand
I don't have a problem with it usually at all.
The problem came about when she started to lie and make excuses up like the text messaging saying she never read them and was in bed when it was right in front of my eyes that she read it.
I would never usually act in this way until I have reason to either way I don't give a dam if she's online anymore I just think crack on.
Posted by Centaur12Posted by PhoenixRisingPosted by Centaur12Posted by saggurl88
What did you do everyday for 18 months before you started relying on DXP for answers?
Lived a happy life before. I have spoken directly to @Easha23000us for advice.
Gem told me she wants to start fresh on her own.
Well then so be it !! I am going to let her go myself when I speak with her tomorrow I am going to tell her to her face that she wants to start fresh on her own I think its a good idea as well because I also want to start fresh on my own is exactly what I am going to do tomorrow.
Jesus. The mere fact that you feel you need to meet her "face to face" to state the obvious only highlights that you're still playing this very bizarre exhausting game. Just live your life, why the hell do you need to meet her to tell her you're going to live your life and "want a fresh start" if not to try to get an emotional reaction from her? Dude, you're both full of it smh....
I have stuff at her house that I want back this is why.click to expand
Ask her to leave it outside her door
“ When I have my children she feels like she's having them for my ex partner “
She sounds cold and selfish.
She sounds cold and selfish.
Posted by SagoxaPosted by Centaur12Posted by saggurl88
What did you do everyday for 18 months before you started relying on DXP for answers?
Lived a happy life before. I have spoken directly to @Easha23000us for advice.
Gem told me she wants to start fresh on her own.
Well then so be it !! I am going to let her go myself when I speak with her tomorrow I am going to tell her to her face that she wants to start fresh on her own I think its a good idea as well because I also want to start fresh on my own is exactly what I am going to do tomorrow.
Why you gotta wait until tomorrow to say that?
Are you expecting her to back down and beg? What happens if she doesnt? You still want to give her ultimatums after ultimatums until you get what you want?
What will you do if she's not budging? Change your strategy and then chase her again?
Just stop.
Think
You want in or out? And then stick to it.
The decision to end a relationship should be final because after weighing the pros and cons, the bad outweighs the good. Not for ultimatums, not to get what you want, not as a mean of power.
Right now youre making a decision because youre angry.. it baffles me reading ur previous post that after 2 years of relationship, her being online and not replying to you becomes this HUGE of a problem...click to expand
*like*
Right? Pure mind games and then he has the nerve to accuse her of the same behaviour he's doing (minus the ultimatums, she apparently doesn't need to do all of that to get him to respond and give in...). And this nonsense about not responding to his message and being online. It's like you're just finding things to be bothered about. She gave you her reason for her lack of response to your message and you keep pushing the issue. You would have been mentally blocked and stayed on "ignore" after I gave you my answer the first time and you kept going on about it. Be mad about that.
If you want her to stop the back and forth mind games lead by example.
Posted by SagoxaPosted by PhoenixRisingPosted by Centaur12Posted by saggurl88
What did you do everyday for 18 months before you started relying on DXP for answers?
Lived a happy life before. I have spoken directly to @Easha23000us for advice.
Gem told me she wants to start fresh on her own.
Well then so be it !! I am going to let her go myself when I speak with her tomorrow I am going to tell her to her face that she wants to start fresh on her own I think its a good idea as well because I also want to start fresh on my own is exactly what I am going to do tomorrow.
Jesus. The mere fact that you feel you need to meet her "face to face" to state the obvious only highlights that you're still playing this very bizarre exhausting game. Just live your life, why the hell do you need to meet her to tell her you're going to live your life and "want a fresh start" if not to try to get an emotional reaction from her? Dude, you're both full of it smh....
Lol.. this.. yes..
My scorpio mars can see right through what he's trying to do 🤣🤣click to expand
Right!?! That sh*t would never fly with a Mars in Scorp. He try to come to me with that bullsh*t I'd just laugh and tell him to make sure he takes all his sh*t that may still be in the house with him when he goes this time. Anything you leave behind gets thrown in the fireplace or donated. GTFOH with the mind games and the emotional manipulation.
You would definitely go on the "don't f*ck with anymore" list with that sh*t. And stay there.
Posted by Centaur12Posted by saggurl88
What did you do everyday for 18 months before you started relying on DXP for answers?
Lived a happy life before. I have spoken directly to @Easha23000us for advice.
Gem told me she wants to start fresh on her own.
Well then so be it !! I am going to let her go myself when I speak with her tomorrow I am going to tell her to her face that she wants to start fresh on her own I think its a good idea as well because I also want to start fresh on my own is exactly what I am going to do tomorrow.click to expand
As per our conversation, I do not think that it is a good idea that you meet with her. Your cut off game should be cold and swift. Do not let her see it coming...That element of surprise will knock her off of her feet. I repeat ,do not go to her. Disappear with out a trace. If you risk going to see her, your feelings will get caught up, making it harder to let it go...
Posted by Centaur12
She has told me she wants a fresh start on her own yet again has said do I want to see her.
Say "no".
Posted by Centaur12
I am not playing games I am having games played on me.
You're delusional or playing ignorant to what you are doing in an effort to get what you want from her. The mind games are on both ends. Stevie Wonder can see this sh*t.
Posted by Centaur12
She has said I want to see how we go until the holiday and that is in 2 weeks time.
Who cares? Answer is still "no". If you say we're done, we're done.
Posted by Centaur12
She said she cannot bond with my children because I reminds her of my ex partner and she feels like she is giving my ex partner her own time when she see my kids she has a bad day.
Okay. Bye, Felica. My kids and I come as a full package. Can't split up the set.
Posted by Centaur12
She said this is because of the year we have had together where my ex has been in the back ground.
Tell her to buy a journal or go see a therapist to unpack her issues.
Posted by Centaur12
She doesn't even have my children in her own house.
Bye, Felica.
Posted by Centaur12
She had been ignoring me on the night times after reading my messages then denied reading them when it's completely obvious that she did as its right in front of me.
Maybe she is. Maybe she isn't. And? If someone doesn't respond to you that is your cue to keep it moving, not pester as to why they aren't responding.
Posted by Centaur12
No more of it now ima tell her that she wants a fresh start then I think its a good idea I won't text her I won't call her I will ignore her.click to expand
Or, you could just live your life without a word---yet you claim you're not playing games....
^^^All of that just reads like a bag of excuses to stay lost and bewildered. Nothing you wrote above explains why you stayed this long other than you enjoy the drama your union creates. "Love" can't explain this. Sorry.
Life is short. Use it wisely.
Life is short. Use it wisely.
Posted by Centaur12
I believe her ex isn't that much of a bad person I think she played him hard like she's playing me right now.
He put up with it because he loved her like I do.
I think I need to get rid of her now because if I don't I think she will find someone else.
Let me break it down I have seen texts from him at the start of our relationship saying to her - There will be no more cuddling or kissing or anything when your lonely.
He has text saying can't believe what you done to me.
She told me at the start that she slept with him in the October and met me in the December.
She said they didn't finish having it as she stopped it I think that's a lie however that is not relevant.
The point is I think they was on and off until she met me and then got rid of him.
She could of even cheated on him who knows. Her response to his texts is - what because I don't want to be with a person who treated me like that smashing up my house getting drunk and walking out all weekend.
I think he didn't know how to handle her and he was driven to this so couldn't handle his own temper.
I will give you an example of what she said recently I told her on the evening that my friend text me about this new place saying we should go there I said yeah okay looks cool and he said yes think of the woman there. Now I completely ignored his text because that isn't like me. I told gem about it and she said did you reply to his text and I said no I didn't even entertain it and she asked why I didn't and I said because that isn't me as a person her reply was and because you have a partner as well right? And I said yes of course but you are looking it at the wrong way I am saying in general I am not like that she said you said that as if you was single and I said no don't let your insecuritys get the better of you she needs constant reasurence from me and then what she will do is try get me to apologise for not saying what she wanted to hear and then play me even more and get into a mood and dissconnect. Do you get what I am saying I know what I want to tell you guys I am just not brilliant at explaining it.
What does ANY of this have to do with you're current situation? You just want people to rally behind you and tell you what to do given she so "evil". You done had a month of that. From many people.
Personally, I think you're spinning most of this narrative and the way you have painted her. Does she have flaws? Sounds like many no doubt, yet you are still with her. So what does that say about you? Case and point, you point out she doesn't want to have much to do with your kids because the colour of your kids eyes causes her PTSD (I'm exaggerating of course)) or whatever bullsh*t reason she has come up with. Okay, so you tell us this so that the people here reading this can say "what an evil b*tch, why she taking it out on your kids?" focusing on her flaws, yet not once have you acknowledged that your decision making skills as a father are very questionable, given you have allowed your children to be exposed to someone that makes them feel unwanted. She isn't the only one with issues here.
Yeah, dude.....just stop.
Posted by PhoenixRising
^^^All of that just reads like a bag of excuses to stay lost and bewildered. Nothing you wrote above explains why you stayed this long other than you enjoy the drama your union creates. "Love" can't explain this. Sorry.
Life is short. Use it wisely.
I have stayed because I have been blinded by her I couldn't see her in the light properly like a outsider would be able to I got to caught up in my emotions with her and she knows how I feel for her hence why I was like a little puppet on a string. I stayed in hope that things would change and get better but they haven't and they won't so its time to call it a day.
Posted by Centaur12Posted by PhoenixRisingPosted by Centaur12Posted by saggurl88
What did you do everyday for 18 months before you started relying on DXP for answers?
Lived a happy life before. I have spoken directly to @Easha23000us for advice.
Gem told me she wants to start fresh on her own.
Well then so be it !! I am going to let her go myself when I speak with her tomorrow I am going to tell her to her face that she wants to start fresh on her own I think its a good idea as well because I also want to start fresh on my own is exactly what I am going to do tomorrow.
Jesus. The mere fact that you feel you need to meet her "face to face" to state the obvious only highlights that you're still playing this very bizarre exhausting game. Just live your life, why the hell do you need to meet her to tell her you're going to live your life and "want a fresh start" if not to try to get an emotional reaction from her? Dude, you're both full of it smh....
I have stuff at her house that I want back this is why.click to expand
Okay. Is there some reason you can't get your belongings without the added speech? You arrive, tell you just want to get your belonging, be polite and respectful and bounce.
Not buying it.
Posted by PhoenixRisingPosted by Centaur12
I believe her ex isn't that much of a bad person I think she played him hard like she's playing me right now.
He put up with it because he loved her like I do.
I think I need to get rid of her now because if I don't I think she will find someone else.
Let me break it down I have seen texts from him at the start of our relationship saying to her - There will be no more cuddling or kissing or anything when your lonely.
He has text saying can't believe what you done to me.
She told me at the start that she slept with him in the October and met me in the December.
She said they didn't finish having it as she stopped it I think that's a lie however that is not relevant.
The point is I think they was on and off until she met me and then got rid of him.
She could of even cheated on him who knows. Her response to his texts is - what because I don't want to be with a person who treated me like that smashing up my house getting drunk and walking out all weekend.
I think he didn't know how to handle her and he was driven to this so couldn't handle his own temper.
I will give you an example of what she said recently I told her on the evening that my friend text me about this new place saying we should go there I said yeah okay looks cool and he said yes think of the woman there. Now I completely ignored his text because that isn't like me. I told gem about it and she said did you reply to his text and I said no I didn't even entertain it and she asked why I didn't and I said because that isn't me as a person her reply was and because you have a partner as well right? And I said yes of course but you are looking it at the wrong way I am saying in general I am not like that she said you said that as if you was single and I said no don't let your insecuritys get the better of you she needs constant reasurence from me and then what she will do is try get me to apologise for not saying what she wanted to hear and then play me even more and get into a mood and dissconnect. Do you get what I am saying I know what I want to tell you guys I am just not brilliant at explaining it.
What does ANY of this have to do with you're current situation? You just want people to rally behind you and tell you what to do given she so "evil". You done had a month of that. From many people.
Personally, I think you're spinning most of this narrative and the way you have painted her. Does she have flaws? Sounds like many no doubt, yet you are still with her. So what does that say about you? Case and point, you point out she doesn't want to have much to do with your kids because the colour of your kids eyes causes her PTSD (I'm exaggerating of course)) or whatever bullsh*t reason she has come up with. Okay, so you tell us this so that the people here reading this can say "what an evil b*tch, why she taking it out on your kids?" focusing on her flaws, yet not once have you acknowledged that your decision making skills as a father are very questionable, given you have allowed your children to be exposed to someone that makes them feel unwanted. She isn't the only one with issues here.
Yeah, dude.....just stop.click to expand
Yes I understand I have also issues with this and I have aloud that to happen and its wrong of me.
I have learnt alot from this.
I know who should and who shouldn't be around me and my children.
I know who I can and can't trust this has opened my eyes.
Posted by PhoenixRisingPosted by Centaur12Posted by PhoenixRisingPosted by Centaur12Posted by saggurl88
What did you do everyday for 18 months before you started relying on DXP for answers?
Lived a happy life before. I have spoken directly to @Easha23000us for advice.
Gem told me she wants to start fresh on her own.
Well then so be it !! I am going to let her go myself when I speak with her tomorrow I am going to tell her to her face that she wants to start fresh on her own I think its a good idea as well because I also want to start fresh on my own is exactly what I am going to do tomorrow.
Jesus. The mere fact that you feel you need to meet her "face to face" to state the obvious only highlights that you're still playing this very bizarre exhausting game. Just live your life, why the hell do you need to meet her to tell her you're going to live your life and "want a fresh start" if not to try to get an emotional reaction from her? Dude, you're both full of it smh....
I have stuff at her house that I want back this is why.
Okay. Is there some reason you can't get your belongings without the added speech? You arrive, tell you just want to get your belonging, be polite and respectful and bounce.
Not buying it.click to expand
No there isn't any reason at all I just thought that I would say my peace and go with my belongings that was all but the more I think about this you are right I should ask for them to be put outside and get them and leave.
Posted by MyStarsShinePosted by Centaur12Posted by PhoenixRisingPosted by Centaur12Posted by saggurl88
What did you do everyday for 18 months before you started relying on DXP for answers?
Lived a happy life before. I have spoken directly to @Easha23000us for advice.
Gem told me she wants to start fresh on her own.
Well then so be it !! I am going to let her go myself when I speak with her tomorrow I am going to tell her to her face that she wants to start fresh on her own I think its a good idea as well because I also want to start fresh on my own is exactly what I am going to do tomorrow.
Jesus. The mere fact that you feel you need to meet her "face to face" to state the obvious only highlights that you're still playing this very bizarre exhausting game. Just live your life, why the hell do you need to meet her to tell her you're going to live your life and "want a fresh start" if not to try to get an emotional reaction from her? Dude, you're both full of it smh....
I have stuff at her house that I want back this is why.
Ask her to leave it outside her doorclick to expand
*like* Or even this. Thinking like a true Scop lol *fist bump MyStarShines*. We don't feel the need to add a lot of unnecessary steps to a simple exchange.
Posted by PhoenixRisingPosted by MyStarsShinePosted by Centaur12Posted by PhoenixRisingPosted by Centaur12Posted by saggurl88
What did you do everyday for 18 months before you started relying on DXP for answers?
Lived a happy life before. I have spoken directly to @Easha23000us for advice.
Gem told me she wants to start fresh on her own.
Well then so be it !! I am going to let her go myself when I speak with her tomorrow I am going to tell her to her face that she wants to start fresh on her own I think its a good idea as well because I also want to start fresh on my own is exactly what I am going to do tomorrow.
Jesus. The mere fact that you feel you need to meet her "face to face" to state the obvious only highlights that you're still playing this very bizarre exhausting game. Just live your life, why the hell do you need to meet her to tell her you're going to live your life and "want a fresh start" if not to try to get an emotional reaction from her? Dude, you're both full of it smh....
I have stuff at her house that I want back this is why.
Ask her to leave it outside her door
*like* Or even this. Thinking like a true Scop lol *fist bump MyStarShines*. We don't feel the need to add a lot of unnecessary steps to a simple exchange.click to expand
I suggested 3 weeks ago that the children be kept out of this and they have been since then so my decision making on that was the right thing to do.
Posted by SagoxaPosted by Centaur12Posted by SagoxaPosted by Centaur12Posted by saggurl88
What did you do everyday for 18 months before you started relying on DXP for answers?
Lived a happy life before. I have spoken directly to @Easha23000us for advice.
Gem told me she wants to start fresh on her own.
Well then so be it !! I am going to let her go myself when I speak with her tomorrow I am going to tell her to her face that she wants to start fresh on her own I think its a good idea as well because I also want to start fresh on my own is exactly what I am going to do tomorrow.
Why you gotta wait until tomorrow to say that?
Are you expecting her to back down and beg? What happens if she doesnt? You still want to give her ultimatums after ultimatums until you get what you want?
What will you do if she's not budging? Change your strategy and then chase her again?
Just stop.
Think
You want in or out? And then stick to it.
The decision to end a relationship should be final because after weighing the pros and cons, the bad outweighs the good. Not for ultimatums, not to get what you want, not as a mean of power.
Right now youre making a decision because youre angry.. it baffles me reading ur previous post that after 2 years of relationship, her being online and not replying to you becomes this HUGE of a problem...
I don't have a problem with it usually at all.
The problem came about when she started to lie and make excuses up like the text messaging saying she never read them and was in bed when it was right in front of my eyes that she read it.
I would never usually act in this way until I have reason to either way I don't give a dam if she's online anymore I just think crack on.
I've been noticing that all of the thing youre complaining about is because she's not saying what you want to hear, her not giving you what you want for yourself.. and when you dont get what you want, instead of putting boundaries, communicating it, tell her your needs and expectation and sticking to it, you resort into this mind games, pettiness and passive agressive behaviour. When she smells it and start doing what youre doing, you panic then start chasing because obviously your mind game is weak compared to her.
About the children thing. For normal people that would be a problem, why wasnt it a red flag for you?
Did you think that after some times she will start accepting them? That you can make her accept them? That is manipulation you know...
You keep saying she's manipulative and playing games, havent you been doing the same?
This whole breaking up thing was only started because she said she want a fresh new start for herself. That phrase didnt sit well with you, because you expect her to keep chasing you.
Stop pointing finger.. she's manipulative, i get it. But did she hold a gun to your head the entire relationship so you keep making bad decisions after bad decisions?
It was all YOU. Your decisions.
Now that you know all her tricks and manipulation, what do you want?
You made a list in your previous post, right?
You're now more aware of her trickery.
Now, Let's imagine a scenario where she starts to say sorry she didnt mean to say she wants a fresh new start for herself and she's willing to do anything for you.
What would you do? What would you want then?click to expand
I understand my bad decisions and actions haven't helped at all we have both made bad ones and insecure at times.
I don't know with the games if I can trust her and I cannot see her ever saying she will do anything for me etc.
Even listening to her on the phone saying she wants me to do stuff to her in bed etc I am now feeling like I'm being used for that if it makes any sense I duno what to say really.
She then changed her tune and said but I am looking forward to the other stuff and not just that.
I need to leave because I am being used that's how I feel about it all.
It's I want you I don't want you I want you I don't want you no one wants to live a life like that.
Posted by SagoxaPosted by Centaur12Posted by SagoxaPosted by Centaur12Posted by saggurl88
What did you do everyday for 18 months before you started relying on DXP for answers?
Lived a happy life before. I have spoken directly to @Easha23000us for advice.
Gem told me she wants to start fresh on her own.
Well then so be it !! I am going to let her go myself when I speak with her tomorrow I am going to tell her to her face that she wants to start fresh on her own I think its a good idea as well because I also want to start fresh on my own is exactly what I am going to do tomorrow.
Why you gotta wait until tomorrow to say that?
Are you expecting her to back down and beg? What happens if she doesnt? You still want to give her ultimatums after ultimatums until you get what you want?
What will you do if she's not budging? Change your strategy and then chase her again?
Just stop.
Think
You want in or out? And then stick to it.
The decision to end a relationship should be final because after weighing the pros and cons, the bad outweighs the good. Not for ultimatums, not to get what you want, not as a mean of power.
Right now youre making a decision because youre angry.. it baffles me reading ur previous post that after 2 years of relationship, her being online and not replying to you becomes this HUGE of a problem...
I don't have a problem with it usually at all.
The problem came about when she started to lie and make excuses up like the text messaging saying she never read them and was in bed when it was right in front of my eyes that she read it.
I would never usually act in this way until I have reason to either way I don't give a dam if she's online anymore I just think crack on.
I've been noticing that all of the thing youre complaining about is because she's not saying what you want to hear, her not giving you what you want for yourself.. and when you dont get what you want, instead of putting boundaries, communicating it, tell her your needs and expectation and sticking to it, you resort into this mind games, pettiness and passive agressive behaviour. When she smells it and start doing what youre doing, you panic then start chasing because obviously your mind game is weak compared to her.
About the children thing. For normal people that would be a problem, why wasnt it a red flag for you?
Did you think that after some times she will start accepting them? That you can make her accept them? That is manipulation you know...
You keep saying she's manipulative and playing games, havent you been doing the same?
This whole breaking up thing was only started because she said she want a fresh new start for herself. That phrase didnt sit well with you, because you expect her to keep chasing you.
Stop pointing finger.. she's manipulative, i get it. But did she hold a gun to your head the entire relationship so you keep making bad decisions after bad decisions?
It was all YOU. Your decisions.
Now that you know all her tricks and manipulation, what do you want?
You made a list in your previous post, right?
You're now more aware of her trickery.
Now, Let's imagine a scenario where she starts to say sorry she didnt mean to say she wants a fresh new start for herself and she's willing to do anything for you.
What would you do? What would you want then?click to expand
@saggurl88
So what do you suggest would be better I asked her in regards to the texts messages about her reading my texts and she tells me she never did but I know they was read because I seen it so it's a lie and you talk about setting boundaries how do I do this if I know she is lying about that what ? I just except her word even though its right in front of my eyes?
Same with the children she tells me she doesnt think she can move past that one stupid thing what am I suppose to do about that when setting boundaries?
Yes at the time my desicions have been bad I should of stopped and thought about and acted.
This is why I stopped seeing her children and her seeing mine because of the comment she made to me.
What is a better way to approach this ?
Posted by Centaur12Posted by SagoxaPosted by Centaur12Posted by SagoxaPosted by Centaur12Posted by saggurl88
What did you do everyday for 18 months before you started relying on DXP for answers?
Lived a happy life before. I have spoken directly to @Easha23000us for advice.
Gem told me she wants to start fresh on her own.
Well then so be it !! I am going to let her go myself when I speak with her tomorrow I am going to tell her to her face that she wants to start fresh on her own I think its a good idea as well because I also want to start fresh on my own is exactly what I am going to do tomorrow.
Why you gotta wait until tomorrow to say that?
Are you expecting her to back down and beg? What happens if she doesnt? You still want to give her ultimatums after ultimatums until you get what you want?
What will you do if she's not budging? Change your strategy and then chase her again?
Just stop.
Think
You want in or out? And then stick to it.
The decision to end a relationship should be final because after weighing the pros and cons, the bad outweighs the good. Not for ultimatums, not to get what you want, not as a mean of power.
Right now youre making a decision because youre angry.. it baffles me reading ur previous post that after 2 years of relationship, her being online and not replying to you becomes this HUGE of a problem...
I don't have a problem with it usually at all.
The problem came about when she started to lie and make excuses up like the text messaging saying she never read them and was in bed when it was right in front of my eyes that she read it.
I would never usually act in this way until I have reason to either way I don't give a dam if she's online anymore I just think crack on.
I've been noticing that all of the thing youre complaining about is because she's not saying what you want to hear, her not giving you what you want for yourself.. and when you dont get what you want, instead of putting boundaries, communicating it, tell her your needs and expectation and sticking to it, you resort into this mind games, pettiness and passive agressive behaviour. When she smells it and start doing what youre doing, you panic then start chasing because obviously your mind game is weak compared to her.
About the children thing. For normal people that would be a problem, why wasnt it a red flag for you?
Did you think that after some times she will start accepting them? That you can make her accept them? That is manipulation you know...
You keep saying she's manipulative and playing games, havent you been doing the same?
This whole breaking up thing was only started because she said she want a fresh new start for herself. That phrase didnt sit well with you, because you expect her to keep chasing you.
Stop pointing finger.. she's manipulative, i get it. But did she hold a gun to your head the entire relationship so you keep making bad decisions after bad decisions?
It was all YOU. Your decisions.
Now that you know all her tricks and manipulation, what do you want?
You made a list in your previous post, right?
You're now more aware of her trickery.
Now, Let's imagine a scenario where she starts to say sorry she didnt mean to say she wants a fresh new start for herself and she's willing to do anything for you.
What would you do? What would you want then?
@saggurl88
So what do you suggest would be better I asked her in regards to the texts messages about her reading my texts and she tells me she never did but I know they was read because I seen it so it's a lie and you talk about setting boundaries how do I do this if I know she is lying about that what ? I just except her word even though its right in front of my eyes?
Same with the children she tells me she doesnt think she can move past that one stupid thing what am I suppose to do about that when setting boundaries?
Yes at the time my desicions have been bad I should of stopped and thought about and acted.
This is why I stopped seeing her children and her seeing mine because of the comment she made to me.
What is a better way to approach this ?click to expand
Sorry I meant @Sagoxa
Posted by Easha23000usPosted by Centaur12Posted by saggurl88
What did you do everyday for 18 months before you started relying on DXP for answers?
Lived a happy life before. I have spoken directly to @Easha23000us for advice.
Gem told me she wants to start fresh on her own.
Well then so be it !! I am going to let her go myself when I speak with her tomorrow I am going to tell her to her face that she wants to start fresh on her own I think its a good idea as well because I also want to start fresh on my own is exactly what I am going to do tomorrow.
As per our conversation, I do not think that it is a good idea that you meet with her. Your cut off game should be cold and swift. Do not let her see it coming...That element of surprise will knock her off of her feet. I repeat ,do not go to her. Disappear with out a trace. If you risk going to see her, your feelings will get caught up, making it harder to let it go...click to expand
Have you ever been with a Gemini? She not gonna let him go.
She will keep coming back because it's mental stimulation for her and he is a control freak, not getting his way, so it's the drama for him that's fun.
The issues of trying to work it out and come up with a conclusion are backburnered to the fun they have in this cycle of bullshit.
Posted by PhoenixRisingPosted by MyStarsShinePosted by Centaur12Posted by PhoenixRisingPosted by Centaur12Posted by saggurl88
What did you do everyday for 18 months before you started relying on DXP for answers?
Lived a happy life before. I have spoken directly to @Easha23000us for advice.
Gem told me she wants to start fresh on her own.
Well then so be it !! I am going to let her go myself when I speak with her tomorrow I am going to tell her to her face that she wants to start fresh on her own I think its a good idea as well because I also want to start fresh on my own is exactly what I am going to do tomorrow.
Jesus. The mere fact that you feel you need to meet her "face to face" to state the obvious only highlights that you're still playing this very bizarre exhausting game. Just live your life, why the hell do you need to meet her to tell her you're going to live your life and "want a fresh start" if not to try to get an emotional reaction from her? Dude, you're both full of it smh....
I have stuff at her house that I want back this is why.
Ask her to leave it outside her door
*like* Or even this. Thinking like a true Scop lol *fist bump MyStarShines*. We don't feel the need to add a lot of unnecessary steps to a simple exchange.click to expand
Indeed 😛
Posted by Centaur12
I believe her ex isn't that much of a bad person I think she played him hard like she's playing me right now.
He put up with it because he loved her like I do.
I think I need to get rid of her now because if I don't I think she will find someone else.
Let me break it down I have seen texts from him at the start of our relationship saying to her - There will be no more cuddling or kissing or anything when your lonely.
He has text saying can't believe what you done to me.
She told me at the start that she slept with him in the October and met me in the December.
She said they didn't finish having it as she stopped it I think that's a lie however that is not relevant.
The point is I think they was on and off until she met me and then got rid of him.
She could of even cheated on him who knows. Her response to his texts is - what because I don't want to be with a person who treated me like that smashing up my house getting drunk and walking out all weekend.
I think he didn't know how to handle her and he was driven to this so couldn't handle his own temper.
I will give you an example of what she said recently I told her on the evening that my friend text me about this new place saying we should go there I said yeah okay looks cool and he said yes think of the woman there. Now I completely ignored his text because that isn't like me. I told gem about it and she said did you reply to his text and I said no I didn't even entertain it and she asked why I didn't and I said because that isn't me as a person her reply was and because you have a partner as well right? And I said yes of course but you are looking it at the wrong way I am saying in general I am not like that she said you said that as if you was single and I said no don't let your insecuritys get the better of you she needs constant reasurence from me and then what she will do is try get me to apologise for not saying what she wanted to hear and then play me even more and get into a mood and dissconnect. Do you get what I am saying I know what I want to tell you guys I am just not brilliant at explaining it.
What exactly was the point of you telling her what your guy friend said to you? To create drama? To see her reaction because she keeps saying she's single and not in a relationship with you- EVEN THOUGH ITS BEEN 2 YEARS-and to let her know there are options out there for you?
Here's a little secret, there usually aren't many options when men play games like this to get someone jealous.
You entertain her and she doesn't want your kids around. This should be everything you need to do to stop the relationship. Your kids should come first. Dealing with a person for years and she can't stand your kids should a major red flag.
Your children should be your first priority in any relationship, not getting your dick wet and trying to work out a solid relationship with her cause you love her.
How will this relationship pan out in 2 more years when she still can't stand your kids?
You are raising a future generation that needs support, care and love from parents as well as a community.
It starts in the home with kids, they need to be in a safe environment.
I said a few things to you in the last thread and you ended up using the words I said about you on her, for your benefit.
This is the type of manipulation that does not work on Geminis. I'm not sure how you can get past all the manipulation tactic that you use, because as you can see they don't work, she plays a better mind game then you. Most Geminis are naturals at this.
You should learn to be direct and not mince words to get things done the way you want.
You have also started leaving out a lot of what you do because every one has called you needy and I guess you don't like that. But these conversations seem so one sided now. It's all about what she does wrong to you, and again, it's been years. It's getting worse, not better.
You don't really want to take a break from her, but you two can't really work things out either.
Why not go to couples therapy?
Posted by saggurl88Posted by Centaur12
I believe her ex isn't that much of a bad person I think she played him hard like she's playing me right now.
He put up with it because he loved her like I do.
I think I need to get rid of her now because if I don't I think she will find someone else.
Let me break it down I have seen texts from him at the start of our relationship saying to her - There will be no more cuddling or kissing or anything when your lonely.
He has text saying can't believe what you done to me.
She told me at the start that she slept with him in the October and met me in the December.
She said they didn't finish having it as she stopped it I think that's a lie however that is not relevant.
The point is I think they was on and off until she met me and then got rid of him.
She could of even cheated on him who knows. Her response to his texts is - what because I don't want to be with a person who treated me like that smashing up my house getting drunk and walking out all weekend.
I think he didn't know how to handle her and he was driven to this so couldn't handle his own temper.
I will give you an example of what she said recently I told her on the evening that my friend text me about this new place saying we should go there I said yeah okay looks cool and he said yes think of the woman there. Now I completely ignored his text because that isn't like me. I told gem about it and she said did you reply to his text and I said no I didn't even entertain it and she asked why I didn't and I said because that isn't me as a person her reply was and because you have a partner as well right? And I said yes of course but you are looking it at the wrong way I am saying in general I am not like that she said you said that as if you was single and I said no don't let your insecuritys get the better of you she needs constant reasurence from me and then what she will do is try get me to apologise for not saying what she wanted to hear and then play me even more and get into a mood and dissconnect. Do you get what I am saying I know what I want to tell you guys I am just not brilliant at explaining it.
What exactly was the point of you telling her what your guy friend said to you? To create drama? To see her reaction because she keeps saying she's single and not in a relationship with you- EVEN THOUGH ITS BEEN 2 YEARS-and to let her know there are options out there for you?
Here's a little secret, there usually aren't many options when men play games like this to get someone jealous.
You entertain her and she doesn't want your kids around. This should be everything you need to do to stop the relationship. Your kids should come first. Dealing with a person for years and she can't stand your kids should a major red flag.
Your children should be your first priority in any relationship, not getting your dick wet and trying to work out a solid relationship with her cause you love her.
How will this relationship pan out in 2 more years when she still can't stand your kids?
You are raising a future generation that needs support, care and love from parents as well as a community.
It starts in the home with kids, they need to be in a safe environment.
I said a few things to you in the last thread and you ended up using the words I said about you on her, for your benefit.
This is the type of manipulation that does not work on Geminis. I'm not sure how you can get past all the manipulation tactic that you use, because as you can see they don't work, she plays a better mind game then you. Most Geminis are naturals at this.
You should learn to be direct and not mince words to get things done the way you want.
You have also started leaving out a lot of what you do because every one has called you needy and I guess you don't like that. But these conversations seem so one sided now. It's all about what she does wrong to you, and again, it's been years. It's getting worse, not better.
You don't really want to take a break from her, but you two can't really work things out either.
Why not go to couples therapy?click to expand
Say we want to sort it out without mind games what is the first step to doing this exactly?
Posted by Centaur12Posted by saggurl88Posted by Centaur12
I believe her ex isn't that much of a bad person I think she played him hard like she's playing me right now.
He put up with it because he loved her like I do.
I think I need to get rid of her now because if I don't I think she will find someone else.
Let me break it down I have seen texts from him at the start of our relationship saying to her - There will be no more cuddling or kissing or anything when your lonely.
He has text saying can't believe what you done to me.
She told me at the start that she slept with him in the October and met me in the December.
She said they didn't finish having it as she stopped it I think that's a lie however that is not relevant.
The point is I think they was on and off until she met me and then got rid of him.
She could of even cheated on him who knows. Her response to his texts is - what because I don't want to be with a person who treated me like that smashing up my house getting drunk and walking out all weekend.
I think he didn't know how to handle her and he was driven to this so couldn't handle his own temper.
I will give you an example of what she said recently I told her on the evening that my friend text me about this new place saying we should go there I said yeah okay looks cool and he said yes think of the woman there. Now I completely ignored his text because that isn't like me. I told gem about it and she said did you reply to his text and I said no I didn't even entertain it and she asked why I didn't and I said because that isn't me as a person her reply was and because you have a partner as well right? And I said yes of course but you are looking it at the wrong way I am saying in general I am not like that she said you said that as if you was single and I said no don't let your insecuritys get the better of you she needs constant reasurence from me and then what she will do is try get me to apologise for not saying what she wanted to hear and then play me even more and get into a mood and dissconnect. Do you get what I am saying I know what I want to tell you guys I am just not brilliant at explaining it.
What exactly was the point of you telling her what your guy friend said to you? To create drama? To see her reaction because she keeps saying she's single and not in a relationship with you- EVEN THOUGH ITS BEEN 2 YEARS-and to let her know there are options out there for you?
Here's a little secret, there usually aren't many options when men play games like this to get someone jealous.
You entertain her and she doesn't want your kids around. This should be everything you need to do to stop the relationship. Your kids should come first. Dealing with a person for years and she can't stand your kids should a major red flag.
Your children should be your first priority in any relationship, not getting your dick wet and trying to work out a solid relationship with her cause you love her.
How will this relationship pan out in 2 more years when she still can't stand your kids?
You are raising a future generation that needs support, care and love from parents as well as a community.
It starts in the home with kids, they need to be in a safe environment.
I said a few things to you in the last thread and you ended up using the words I said about you on her, for your benefit.
This is the type of manipulation that does not work on Geminis. I'm not sure how you can get past all the manipulation tactic that you use, because as you can see they don't work, she plays a better mind game then you. Most Geminis are naturals at this.
You should learn to be direct and not mince words to get things done the way you want.
You have also started leaving out a lot of what you do because every one has called you needy and I guess you don't like that. But these conversations seem so one sided now. It's all about what she does wrong to you, and again, it's been years. It's getting worse, not better.
You don't really want to take a break from her, but you two can't really work things out either.
Why not go to couples therapy?
Say we want to sort it out without mind games what is the first step to doing this exactly?click to expand
I DM'd you.
Posted by Centaur12Posted by PhoenixRising
^^^All of that just reads like a bag of excuses to stay lost and bewildered. Nothing you wrote above explains why you stayed this long other than you enjoy the drama your union creates. "Love" can't explain this. Sorry.
Life is short. Use it wisely.
I have stayed because I have been blinded by her I couldn't see her in the light properly like a outsider would be able to I got to caught up in my emotions with her and she knows how I feel for her hence why I was like a little puppet on a string. I stayed in hope that things would change and get better but they haven't and they won't so its time to call it a day.click to expand
Right. Yet, in this thread alone you admitted to more than once wanting to still give it another go round and the only reason you're not is because she wants to make a fresh start. You've admitted to being confused by her requested to "wait and see", despite knowing (based on what you just wrote in this post) "things won't change". You seem confused by her decision to do exactly what you're claiming to know you should do, yet haven't. Her flip-floppiness has nothing to do with you being able to make the right decision for yourself. You're no victim here, so save the "puppet on a string" bit as if you had no personal autonomy and she was just dragging you along. You could have gotten off this crazy train at any time, love or no love. What this suggest to me is that you love her more than you love yourself.
See the whole "I am blinded by love because I'm in the middle of it" can only take you so far. I do understand where you're coming from, don't get me wrong. However, you are approximately 8 weeks later, 5 threads deep, 25.99% of the DXP community saying the same thing too late for that, and you still want to turn around and say "I couldn't see her properly like an outside can". That would have been true pre-thread one. Not post-thread 5.
If you want better Centaur, do better yourself.
Posted by PhoenixRisingPosted by Centaur12Posted by PhoenixRising
^^^All of that just reads like a bag of excuses to stay lost and bewildered. Nothing you wrote above explains why you stayed this long other than you enjoy the drama your union creates. "Love" can't explain this. Sorry.
Life is short. Use it wisely.
I have stayed because I have been blinded by her I couldn't see her in the light properly like a outsider would be able to I got to caught up in my emotions with her and she knows how I feel for her hence why I was like a little puppet on a string. I stayed in hope that things would change and get better but they haven't and they won't so its time to call it a day.
Right. Yet, in this thread alone you admitted to more than once wanting to still give it another go round and the only reason you're not is because she wants to make a fresh start. You've admitted to being confused by her requested to "wait and see", despite knowing (based on what you just wrote in this post) "things won't change". You seem confused by her decision to do exactly what you're claiming to know you should do, yet haven't. Her flip-floppiness has nothing to do with you being able to make the right decision for yourself. You're no victim here, so save the "puppet on a string" bit as if you had no personal autonomy and she was just dragging you along. You could have gotten off this crazy train at any time, love or no love. What this suggest to me is that you love her more than you love yourself.
See the whole "I am blinded by love because I'm in the middle of it" can only take you so far. I do understand where you're coming from, don't get me wrong. However, you are approximately 8 weeks later, 5 threads deep, 25.99% of the DXP community saying the same thing too late for that, and you still want to turn around and say "I couldn't see her properly like an outside can". That would have been true pre-thread one. Not post-thread 5.
If you want better Centaur, do better yourself.click to expand
We are more than 5 threads deep. This is his 3rd account that I've noticed... there could've been more
Posted by LadyNeptunePosted by PhoenixRisingPosted by Centaur12Posted by PhoenixRising
^^^All of that just reads like a bag of excuses to stay lost and bewildered. Nothing you wrote above explains why you stayed this long other than you enjoy the drama your union creates. "Love" can't explain this. Sorry.
Life is short. Use it wisely.
I have stayed because I have been blinded by her I couldn't see her in the light properly like a outsider would be able to I got to caught up in my emotions with her and she knows how I feel for her hence why I was like a little puppet on a string. I stayed in hope that things would change and get better but they haven't and they won't so its time to call it a day.
Right. Yet, in this thread alone you admitted to more than once wanting to still give it another go round and the only reason you're not is because she wants to make a fresh start. You've admitted to being confused by her requested to "wait and see", despite knowing (based on what you just wrote in this post) "things won't change". You seem confused by her decision to do exactly what you're claiming to know you should do, yet haven't. Her flip-floppiness has nothing to do with you being able to make the right decision for yourself. You're no victim here, so save the "puppet on a string" bit as if you had no personal autonomy and she was just dragging you along. You could have gotten off this crazy train at any time, love or no love. What this suggest to me is that you love her more than you love yourself.
See the whole "I am blinded by love because I'm in the middle of it" can only take you so far. I do understand where you're coming from, don't get me wrong. However, you are approximately 8 weeks later, 5 threads deep, 25.99% of the DXP community saying the same thing too late for that, and you still want to turn around and say "I couldn't see her properly like an outside can". That would have been true pre-thread one. Not post-thread 5.
If you want better Centaur, do better yourself.
We are more than 5 threads deep. This is his 3rd account that I've noticed... there could've been moreclick to expand
*like*
People in this place change usernames/accounts probably more often than they change their underwear. I stopped paying attention.
I read he had more threads/accounts in one of his threads, however I have a habit of needing to be as accurate as I can and those were the only ones I was aware of with 100% certainty.
Posted by PhoenixRisingPosted by LadyNeptunePosted by PhoenixRisingPosted by Centaur12Posted by PhoenixRising
^^^All of that just reads like a bag of excuses to stay lost and bewildered. Nothing you wrote above explains why you stayed this long other than you enjoy the drama your union creates. "Love" can't explain this. Sorry.
Life is short. Use it wisely.
I have stayed because I have been blinded by her I couldn't see her in the light properly like a outsider would be able to I got to caught up in my emotions with her and she knows how I feel for her hence why I was like a little puppet on a string. I stayed in hope that things would change and get better but they haven't and they won't so its time to call it a day.
Right. Yet, in this thread alone you admitted to more than once wanting to still give it another go round and the only reason you're not is because she wants to make a fresh start. You've admitted to being confused by her requested to "wait and see", despite knowing (based on what you just wrote in this post) "things won't change". You seem confused by her decision to do exactly what you're claiming to know you should do, yet haven't. Her flip-floppiness has nothing to do with you being able to make the right decision for yourself. You're no victim here, so save the "puppet on a string" bit as if you had no personal autonomy and she was just dragging you along. You could have gotten off this crazy train at any time, love or no love. What this suggest to me is that you love her more than you love yourself.
See the whole "I am blinded by love because I'm in the middle of it" can only take you so far. I do understand where you're coming from, don't get me wrong. However, you are approximately 8 weeks later, 5 threads deep, 25.99% of the DXP community saying the same thing too late for that, and you still want to turn around and say "I couldn't see her properly like an outside can". That would have been true pre-thread one. Not post-thread 5.
If you want better Centaur, do better yourself.
We are more than 5 threads deep. This is his 3rd account that I've noticed... there could've been more
*like*
People in this place change usernames/accounts probably more often than they change their underwear. I stopped paying attention.
I read he had more threads/accounts in one of his threads, however I have a habit of needing to be as accurate as I can and those were the only ones I was aware of with 100% certainty.click to expand
Yeah I linked a few of them on one of his threads.
Personally I wouldn't want to be 'loved' by someone like him. How is it love if you are bad mouthing your person online for months to randos? Miss me with that kinda love.
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