to start off, i've never done this and have never been a victim of it but that it happens is fascinating. So is it to ridicule, shame, just for fun, stress relief? is there material gain?
someone explain the psychology and motivation behind catfishing
Posted by littlenanobyteHe's got a way of doing that, @capri-sun does 😛
Bah, I didn't read Capri-Sun's reply before I posted mine. Yea... essentially that.
Some people just don't believe they are good enough, attractive, or instantly lovable. So they may catfish as a way of finally showing their real self with the hope the person will fall in love with them and then accept them completely. There's is the hope at true love that will conquer all - including the deception.
dissatisfaction with self i guess..
Do you guys think the person with self esteem issues may use this as a way to eventually be true to themself and try for a real relationship afterwards?
Posted by BuffaloBills28http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=catfish
Don't even know what "catfish" means, and in what way people use that immature word... People who've been brainwashed by a generation that's overpopulated by immature clowns who have no respect for anything, therefore use words like "catfish" to point out another persons flaws?.. Or the flaws that they may perceive a person to have. Clown like people pretty much.
TOP DEFINITION
A catfish is someone who pretends to be someone they're not using Facebook or other social media to create false identities, particularly to pursue deceptive online romances.
Did you hear how Dave got totally catfished last month?! The fox he thought he was talking to turned out to be a pervy guy from San Diego!
or
I was really falling for that gorgeous gal on Facebook, but she turned out to be a catfish.
#weirdo #online #facebook #sketchy #loner
there are services where people will pretend to be your girlfriend. I assume this is useful for folks who dont want to be bugged or something by others with romantic interest or by family pushing you to find someone:
https://invisiblegirlfriend.com/
http://www.fakeinternetgirlfriend.com/
https://invisiblegirlfriend.com/
http://www.fakeinternetgirlfriend.com/
Posted by littlenanobyteYeah I think it's starts out just as some 'harmless' fun and self esteem booster. But then feelings get involved and shit gets real and they are caught in a trap of their own making. Some of them are able to prolong meeting in person for years.
I haven't done it before, but I am 99.9% certain it has to do with low self esteem. Trying to feel wanted by people they could never obtain irl. Maybe they want to get back at the types they could never obtain as a form of payback, I don't know. There's absolutely a lot of psychology behind it.
On that catfish show, they were more often than not morbidly obese. Just something I noticed - goes back to self esteem.
Posted by littlenanobyteAt that point its not only their self esteem and pride on the line, its their heart too. They are afraid to reveal their lie and worry, rightly so, that they will loose the other person. Just the epitome of selfishness.Posted by LadyNeptuneYes exactly, and it's so crazy. Literally fucking with someone's feelings for years on end because of their own self esteem problems. It's actually kind of sad. I don't know why it's so hard to just fess up about it sooner rather than later.Posted by littlenanobyteYeah I think it's starts out just as some 'harmless' fun and self esteem booster. But then feelings get involved and shit gets real and they are caught in a trap of their own making. Some of them are able to prolong meeting in person for years.
I haven't done it before, but I am 99.9% certain it has to do with low self esteem. Trying to feel wanted by people they could never obtain irl. Maybe they want to get back at the types they could never obtain as a form of payback, I don't know. There's absolutely a lot of psychology behind it.
On that catfish show, they were more often than not morbidly obese. Just something I noticed - goes back to self esteem.
click to expand
Posted by Gem_from_VenusMental illness can explain it, television show seems crazy.. But then I guess it IS TV.
I have a real life friend who admitted to me that she was doing it. She had serious mental health problems I'll not name. When I asked why she would do such a thing, she just kept demanding to know why she should not do it. She said it was "fun," "no big deal," "none of my business." She was unable to find anyone to date at the time. I think that was the real reason. She wanted to "try out" dating with real people since she couldn't actually find anyone to date at the time, and she didn't want to admit to me or herself that it was wrong.
Posted by Gem_from_VenusThe thing is, that is so time consuming that it really does detract from real life relationships. It seems bad for both parties, the catfished and the catfisher as well.
...she revealed that she had dozens of online personas and was pretend dating a few different people who thought she was someone else entirely.
I have been catfished many times while playing tinder. Its just normal because humans are selfish and we all want the best for ourselves.
Posted by rabidtalkerwow really?
there are services where people will pretend to be your girlfriend. I assume this is useful for folks who dont want to be bugged or something by others with romantic interest or by family pushing you to find someone:
https://invisiblegirlfriend.com/
http://www.fakeinternetgirlfriend.com/
I've heard of call girls being paid for that though but call girls (prostitutes) cost ALOT of money...
so this site is good for the average joe who will pay a night out and introduce the woman to his friends and family for a night evening or a wedding he has to go to and doesn't want to be alone.
Posted by Capri-sunthis.
Fun or attention. Material gain, just getting attention. I find some people are not confident in their own value they have and can bring to someone else's life so they fabricate the truth or make fictitious stories, attributes in hopes of getting someone's attention, affection, love who they feel they normally would not be able to attain.
I've heard of incidents that MONEY is sent to the bearer, too. so material gain.
and there are times when they actually do MEET...and the man (this is a true story from the UK)
brings the woman to meet his FAKE family. lol (yes they go through lengths of this to buy fake families)
and then the woman is ooohhhhh awwwwwww.....i'm in love.
and she goes back to the UK and she has this great job where she gets paid, and sends the man several thousands of pounds to him. not only once but twice.
my mother in law also knows of a co worker who did this, who fell in love with a man from India. lol
Of course not all scammers are from India or Asia. lol they are everywhere. it is just coincidental they were from there, because UK gets a lot of scammers like this too.
but they go through lengths of buying cheap family for introducing them to the rich girlfriend. well she's not rich but she's got a lot of money. so to a poor Asian boy in a 3rd world country, to him, that's bloody rich!!!! he could be getting several thousands and then pay off the family 10 pounds each for a job well done.
edit
of course not all mail order brides or grooms are like this...there are honest ones.who truly seek for love and security.
I was catfished when I was a kid. They were a girl pretending to be a guy. We became best friends tbh. And then a few years later they told me they couldn't do it any longer and just spilled everything. Honesty who they really turned out to be was greater than what they pretended. She's possibly the most sane, sweet, thoughtful person I've ever met. We still kept in touch. A few years later she turned out to be lesbian. I wasn't surprised. Everything she did when we were kids just made sense. I guess it started out as a little experiment for her until she got too into it and didn't know how to get out.
When I was younger in school I also knew a group of girls who catfished another classmate. These girls were smart and friendly in real life, you'd never imagine. They were vicious and made that poor girl cut herself and get ridiculed by her mom because they made her believe she got pregnant. These girls are doing completely great now. Idk about the emo chick.
As for adults, wtf, this shit still happens post-myspace? You'd have to be a moron to get catfished these days.
@kittenlarouge is my mom
When I was younger in school I also knew a group of girls who catfished another classmate. These girls were smart and friendly in real life, you'd never imagine. They were vicious and made that poor girl cut herself and get ridiculed by her mom because they made her believe she got pregnant. These girls are doing completely great now. Idk about the emo chick.
As for adults, wtf, this shit still happens post-myspace? You'd have to be a moron to get catfished these days.
@kittenlarouge is my mom
Posted by lisabethur8No, they pretend to be one online only.Posted by rabidtalkerwow really?
there are services where people will pretend to be your girlfriend. I assume this is useful for folks who dont want to be bugged or something by others with romantic interest or by family pushing you to find someone:
https://invisiblegirlfriend.com/
http://www.fakeinternetgirlfriend.com/
I've heard of call girls being paid for that though but call girls (prostitutes) cost ALOT of money...
so this site is good for the average joe who will pay a night out and introduce the woman to his friends and family for a night evening or a wedding he has to go to and doesn't want to be alone.click to expand
Posted by SassyKiwiI wonder if it's the same type of thing that makes normal people turn into real assholes when they are safe in the confines of their car -- being safe behind your computer screen lets the alter-ego out.
When I was younger in school I also knew a group of girls who catfished another classmate. These girls were smart and friendly in real life, you'd never imagine. They were vicious and made that poor girl cut herself and get ridiculed by her mom because they made her believe she got pregnant. These girls are doing completely great now. Idk about the emo chick.
As for adults, wtf, this shit still happens post-myspace? You'd have to be a moron to get catfished these days.
@kittenlarouge is my mom
I'm surprised no one has mentioned this:
http://abcnews.go.com/US/notre-dame-football-star-manti-teo-dead-girlfriend/story?id=18232374
Notre Dame's athletic director and the star of its near-championship football team said the widely-reported death of the star's girlfriend from leukemia during the 2012 football season was apparently a hoax, and the player said he was duped by it as well.
Manti Te'o, who led the Fighting Irish to the BCS championship game this year and finished second for the Heisman Trophy, said in a statement today that he fell in love with a girl online last year who turned out not to be real.
The university's athletic director, Jack Swarbrick, said it has been investigating the "cruel hoax" since Te'o approached officials in late December to say he believed he had been tricked.
Private investigators hired by the university subsequently monitored online chatter by the alleged perpetrators, Swarbrick said, adding that he was shocked by the "casual cruelty" it revealed.
"They enjoyed the joke," Swarbrick said, comparing the ruse to the popular film "Catfish," in which filmmakers revealed a person at the other end of an online relationship was not who they said they were.
"While we still don't know all of the dimensions of this ... there are certain things that I feel confident we do know," Swarbrick said. "The first is that this was a very elaborate, very sophisticated hoax, perpetrated for reasons we don't understand."
Te'o said during the season that his girlfriend, Lennay Kekua, died of leukemia in September on the same day Te'o's grandmother died, triggering an outpouring of support for Te'o at Notre Dame and in the media.
"While my grandma passed away and you take, you know, the love of my life [Kekua]. The last thing she said to me was, 'I love you,'" Te'o said at the time, noting that he had talked to Kekua on the phone and by text message until her death.
Now, responding to a story first reported by the sports website Deadspin, Te'o has acknowledged that Kekua never existed. The website reported today that there were no records of a woman named Lennay Kekua anywhere.
Te'o denied that he was in on the hoax.
"This is incredibly embarrassing to talk about, but over an extended period of time, I developed an emotional relationship with a woman I met online," Te'o said in a statement released this afternoon. "We maintained what I thought to be an authentic relationship by communicating frequently online and on the phone, and I grew to care deeply about her."
Swarbrick said he expected Te'o to give his version of events at a public event soon, perhaps Thursday, and that he believed Te'o's representatives were planning to disclose the truth next week until today's story broke.
Deadspin reported that the image attached to Kekua's social media profiles, through which the pair interacted, was of another woman who has said she did not even know Te'o or know that her picture was being used. The website reported that it traced the profiles to a California man who is an acquaintance of Te'o and of the woman whose photo was stolen.
"To realize that I was the victim of what was apparently someone's sick joke and constant lies was, and is, painful and humiliating," Te'o said.
According to Notre Dame, Te'o and his family came forward to the university with concerns that Te'o had been the victim of a hoax in December 2012.
"On Dec. 26, Notre Dame coaches were informed by Manti Te'o and his parents that Manti had been the victim of what appears to be a hoax in which someone using the fictitious name, Lennay Kekua, apparently ingratiated herself with Manti and then conspired with others to lead him to believe she had tragically died of leukemia," the university said in a statement released today.
"The university immediately initiated an investigation to assist Manti and his family in discovering the motive for and nature of this hoax," it said. "While the proper authorities will continue to investigate this troubling matter, this appears to be, at a minimum, a sad and very cruel deception to entertain its perpetrators."
Though the university's statement may have implied that it referred the matter to outside authorities, Swarbrick later said that the university had only hired a private investigator and not notified the NCAA or law enforcement.
"There's no factual predicate for an NCAA violation that we could find," he said.
"And no, we did not refer this to criminal authorities," he added. "We believe it's the victim's decision to make."
Te'o is currently preparing for the NFL draft, according to his statement.
"There's a lot of tragedy here, there's a lot of sorrow here," Swarbrick said.
"But the thing I am most sad of is--" he added, pausing to apologize and wipe away tears, is "that the single most trusting human being I have ever met will never be able to trust in the same way ever again."
http://abcnews.go.com/US/notre-dame-football-star-manti-teo-dead-girlfriend/story?id=18232374
Notre Dame's athletic director and the star of its near-championship football team said the widely-reported death of the star's girlfriend from leukemia during the 2012 football season was apparently a hoax, and the player said he was duped by it as well.
Manti Te'o, who led the Fighting Irish to the BCS championship game this year and finished second for the Heisman Trophy, said in a statement today that he fell in love with a girl online last year who turned out not to be real.
The university's athletic director, Jack Swarbrick, said it has been investigating the "cruel hoax" since Te'o approached officials in late December to say he believed he had been tricked.
Private investigators hired by the university subsequently monitored online chatter by the alleged perpetrators, Swarbrick said, adding that he was shocked by the "casual cruelty" it revealed.
"They enjoyed the joke," Swarbrick said, comparing the ruse to the popular film "Catfish," in which filmmakers revealed a person at the other end of an online relationship was not who they said they were.
"While we still don't know all of the dimensions of this ... there are certain things that I feel confident we do know," Swarbrick said. "The first is that this was a very elaborate, very sophisticated hoax, perpetrated for reasons we don't understand."
Te'o said during the season that his girlfriend, Lennay Kekua, died of leukemia in September on the same day Te'o's grandmother died, triggering an outpouring of support for Te'o at Notre Dame and in the media.
"While my grandma passed away and you take, you know, the love of my life [Kekua]. The last thing she said to me was, 'I love you,'" Te'o said at the time, noting that he had talked to Kekua on the phone and by text message until her death.
Now, responding to a story first reported by the sports website Deadspin, Te'o has acknowledged that Kekua never existed. The website reported today that there were no records of a woman named Lennay Kekua anywhere.
Te'o denied that he was in on the hoax.
"This is incredibly embarrassing to talk about, but over an extended period of time, I developed an emotional relationship with a woman I met online," Te'o said in a statement released this afternoon. "We maintained what I thought to be an authentic relationship by communicating frequently online and on the phone, and I grew to care deeply about her."
Swarbrick said he expected Te'o to give his version of events at a public event soon, perhaps Thursday, and that he believed Te'o's representatives were planning to disclose the truth next week until today's story broke.
Deadspin reported that the image attached to Kekua's social media profiles, through which the pair interacted, was of another woman who has said she did not even know Te'o or know that her picture was being used. The website reported that it traced the profiles to a California man who is an acquaintance of Te'o and of the woman whose photo was stolen.
"To realize that I was the victim of what was apparently someone's sick joke and constant lies was, and is, painful and humiliating," Te'o said.
According to Notre Dame, Te'o and his family came forward to the university with concerns that Te'o had been the victim of a hoax in December 2012.
"On Dec. 26, Notre Dame coaches were informed by Manti Te'o and his parents that Manti had been the victim of what appears to be a hoax in which someone using the fictitious name, Lennay Kekua, apparently ingratiated herself with Manti and then conspired with others to lead him to believe she had tragically died of leukemia," the university said in a statement released today.
"The university immediately initiated an investigation to assist Manti and his family in discovering the motive for and nature of this hoax," it said. "While the proper authorities will continue to investigate this troubling matter, this appears to be, at a minimum, a sad and very cruel deception to entertain its perpetrators."
Though the university's statement may have implied that it referred the matter to outside authorities, Swarbrick later said that the university had only hired a private investigator and not notified the NCAA or law enforcement.
"There's no factual predicate for an NCAA violation that we could find," he said.
"And no, we did not refer this to criminal authorities," he added. "We believe it's the victim's decision to make."
Te'o is currently preparing for the NFL draft, according to his statement.
"There's a lot of tragedy here, there's a lot of sorrow here," Swarbrick said.
"But the thing I am most sad of is--" he added, pausing to apologize and wipe away tears, is "that the single most trusting human being I have ever met will never be able to trust in the same way ever again."
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