Cancer men testing - how worthy is it to pass the test?

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queenmy
@queenmy
6 Years

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Hello everyone.

I've heard a lot about the cancer men testing the women they're interested in, I've seen many interesting posts here as well. I've read stories about it in other websites I even read a woman talking about her husband and how he put her through hell and when the test was over she found the diamond he really was (she used the word diamond).

So I'm wodering if you guys have any stories and maybe some tips on how to pass the test ahaha Cancer men, feel free to give your testimony as well.

Thank you in advance.
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queenmy
@queenmy
6 Years

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Posted by rabidtalker
Posted by queenmy

So I'm wodering if you guys have any stories and maybe some tips on how to pass the test ahaha Cancer men, feel free to give your testimony as well.

Thank you in advance.

If I'm testing you, I'm doubting you -- probably not a good place to be.
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You don't exactly have to be a genius to understand that 😂

My intentions are pure but they are being doubted because of things outside of my control and it's not like I have an opportunity to show my intentions because everything I do is perceived as a personal attack. Like I said, my intentions are pure but it's starting to take a toll on me...
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E. M. Henderson
@Emhendo
8 Years1,000+ PostsCancer

Comments: 6961 · Posts: 3640 · Topics: 152
Look,

Ima tell you like this. As a crab, I know it’s hard to catch a crab.

I’m a hard person to finally get in a relationship with. If I want you, I WANT YOU. I hold on and don’t let go until I get what I want.

If he wants you, you will know. He will be very persistent, communicative, and present.

If he’s not there for you like that, then you have your answer.

I don’t know what you mean by testing you, but what I do I understand about testing a woman… Is that you have to see if she really likes YOU, or likes what you can do for her. Is he testing you like that? How is he testing you?

Long story short, a Cancer man goes for what he wants… Whether they want him back or not. If you not sure, then I’m not sure for you as well. Cuz you will always know.

I’ve played women and had women chasing me before, but that was because I didn’t really like them the way I wanted to like them how they liked me. A Cancer will keep you around because they don’t want to hurt you, and it’s no reason to not have a nice woman around anyway.. sometimes if we going through shit - we don’t do relationships as well.. So take that into consideration..

Also women grow on us… Later.

Just because you like me, I might not like you back immediately, but if there if there is some chemistry - you can 100% grow on a Cancer. A Cancer can grow to love someone.

As far as the chick that “became a diamond”… He probably put her through the ringer, didn’t really like her like that, but when it was all said and done - ended up with her. Sounds like a case of a woman growing on him.. Like it’s happened to me.
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queenmy
@queenmy
6 Years

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Posted by Emhendo

Look,

Ima tell you like this. As a crab, I know it’s hard to catch a crab.

I’m a hard person to finally get in a relationship with. If I want you, I WANT YOU. I hold on and don’t let go until I get what I want.

If he wants you, you will know. He will be very persistent, communicative, and present.

If he’s not there for you like that, then you have your answer.

I don’t know what you mean by testing you, but what I do I understand about testing a woman… Is that you have to see if she really likes YOU, or likes what you can do for her. Is he testing you like that? How is he testing you?

Long story short, a Cancer man goes for what he wants… Whether they want him back or not. If you not sure, then I’m not sure for you as well. Cuz you will always know.

I’ve played women and had women chasing me before, but that was because I didn’t really like them the way I wanted to like them how they liked me. A Cancer will keep you around because they don’t want to hurt you, and it’s no reason to not have a nice woman around anyway.. sometimes if we going through shit - we don’t do relationships as well.. So take that into consideration..

Also women grow on us… Later.

Just because you like me, I might not like you back immediately, but if there if there is some chemistry - you can 100% grow on a Cancer. A Cancer can grow to love someone.

As far as the chick that “became a diamond”… He probably put her through the ringer, didn’t really like her like that, but when it was all said and done - ended up with her. Sounds like a case of a woman growing on him.. Like it’s happened to me.


Hey there. Thank you so much for your productive take on this ahaha

He's going through shit, yes. There's also another thing - long distance. We're kinda like just friends now though.

The reason why I think I'm being tested is because there has been lots of comments about me "just finding another guy". I actually had to ask him multiple times to stop those comments as they were coming across as jealousy to me and therefore giving me false hope. He constantly says things about me not wanting to talk to him and ignoring him, which is not true. Not long ago we went a day without talking and he ignored me for a week saying he gave up because I gave up (we're talking again now).

Since there's physical distance, I can't expect him to be emotionally invested in someone he hasn't even met (please don't judge me xD). I feel like if I cut him off now I will be missing out on something great so I want to give him the benefit of the doubt until we get to meet. The problem is he's super closed off. I don't even know how to grow on him, everything I do is perceived as a personal attack and if I can't grow on him I'm starting to wonder if we'll ever meet. And you say cancers keep people around so they won't hurt them, this makes me even more confused. This is a case where he could literally just block me and I'd be gone from his life, why keep me around for so long?

I just feel very unappreciated sometimes. I want to be understanding of other people's issues and that has led me to make the mistake in the past of justifying people's actions with their "issues" when the only issue that was ever there was the lack of interest and I can't help but to be scared of the idea that I may be making the same mistake again but at the same time I've never been in a long distance thing with someone who is actually going through shit so I have nothing to compare this with...
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queenmy
@queenmy
6 Years

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Posted by bmoon8

What sign are you?

What is he “testing” or how is he “testing”?

In other words, what is he doing?

Cancers test to see if you care.


Hi! I'm a virgo. Aquarius moon.

We started off pursuing something romantic but then he started going through some stuff and pulled away. Right before he pulled away I teased him about something, like we would do all the time and he said "you'll just find another guy... wouldn't be too hard". So I think him pulling away was a mix of him not trusting me and what was going on in his life. A lot happened and now we're kinda like "friends" but if I don't talk to him for a while he just says I found new guy, he says that I don't show him enough interest. Up until not long ago, he would make comments about my "new guy" at least three times a day, until we had a huge fight because I asked him to stop saying that (I had to ask him like 4 times). He still made a couple of comments after that fight but he has stopped them. He's suspicious of everything I say or do. He's super closed off most of the time and it almost seems like he doesn't want to get too personal. He doesn't trust me. To me it feels like he's just expecting me to leave out of nowhere. So he's been pushing my buttons to see if I will leave or not. It feels like he's showing me his darkest side on purpose while staying emotionally detached to see if I will stay or not.
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queenmy
@queenmy
6 Years

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Posted by bmoon8
Posted by queenmy
Posted by bmoon8

What sign are you?

What is he “testing” or how is he “testing”?

In other words, what is he doing?

Cancers test to see if you care.

Hi! I'm a virgo. Aquarius moon.

We started off pursuing something romantic but then he started going through some stuff and pulled away. Right before he pulled away I teased him about something, like we would do all the time and he said "you'll just find another guy... wouldn't be too hard". So I think him pulling away was a mix of him not trusting me and what was going on in his life. A lot happened and now we're kinda like "friends" but if I don't talk to him for a while he just says I found new guy, he says that I don't show him enough interest. Up until not long ago, he would make comments about my "new guy" at least three times a day, until we had a huge fight because I asked him to stop saying that (I had to ask him like 4 times). He still made a couple of comments after that fight but he has stopped them. He's suspicious of everything I say or do. He's super closed off most of the time and it almost seems like he doesn't want to get too personal. He doesn't trust me. To me it feels like he's just expecting me to leave out of nowhere. So he's been pushing my buttons to see if I will leave or not. It feels like he's showing me his darkest side on purpose while staying emotionally detached to see if I will stay or not.

Analytical Virgo analyzing. What did you say in a teasing manner? It honestly sounds like he is pushing you away. You’re right. He does not trust you. Without a foundation of trust, there is no true or real relationship here.
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Something about me not cuddling with him, that's what I said in a teasing way. There's stuff that contributed to him taking it seriously though. And I'm not really expecting him to trust someone he hasn't met yet when he's been open about having trust issues. It will change when we meet though. He's trying to push me away but I have a hard time believing it's because he really just wants me to go away. He could literally just block me and I'd be gone. That's why I think he's testing me.
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LadyNeptune
@LadyNeptune
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Posted by queenmy

And I'm not really expecting him to trust someone he hasn't met yet when he's been open about having trust issues.

Ok so you haven't even met yet? Wtf is this overthinking and doing the most for someone you haven't even met.

I get that these pandemic times are tough but come on man.

Surely you have better things to do with your time and mental energy then doing backflips for a virtual (I mean that in both senses of the word) stranger.

Your asking why he is so mean and won't block you. Its your boundaries you can control, not his. He won't block you either as you keep coming back to take his punishment and entertain him.
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queenmy
@queenmy
6 Years

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Posted by bmoon8
Posted by queenmy
Posted by bmoon8

A Cancer woman I was with would test to see if I care by trying to fight with me or to have drama. I would silently just put a wall up and headed out of that tango real quick.

Omg yes!!! I used to engage in the fights but now I just take a deep breath and make a joke about it.

I got accused of not caring. 🤷🏻‍♀️
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I got accused of ignoring him and giving up on showing him interest so he ignored me for a few days saying he also gave up and lost interest xD the thing is that he's starting to know me so he knows how to push my buttons... it's making me grow as person though since I always had trouble controlling my temper 😂😂
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LadyNeptune
@LadyNeptune
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Posted by queenmy
Posted by LadyNeptune
Posted by queenmy

And I'm not really expecting him to trust someone he hasn't met yet when he's been open about having trust issues.

Ok so you haven't even met yet? Wtf is this overthinking and doing the most for someone you haven't even met.

I get that these pandemic times are tough but come on man.

Surely you have better things to do with your time and mental energy then doing backflips for a virtual (I mean that in both senses of the word) stranger.

Your asking why he is so mean and won't block you. Its your boundaries you can control, not his. He won't block you either as you keep coming back to take his punishment and entertain him.

Surely you have better things to do than to judge strangers online? I wonder how put together your life is since you know so much 🤔
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I have boundaries. But hey, if you want to waste your time on a stranger that is abusive, makes you feel unappreciated and is manipulative of you without even giving you a face to face meeting... its your life.

I was just pointing out that you deserve more.

But your so offended by that observation but not offended by him accusing you of seeing other people and emotionally gaslighting you... lol I can't. Make it make sense.
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queenmy
@queenmy
6 Years

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Posted by LadyNeptune

*comes online and creates thread asking strangers to judge her situation

*gets offended by strangers judging her situation

If you are looking for only opinions that support your pov just say that


Okay, hear me up miss know it all. My question was very clearly about how cancer men in general are in a relrelationship. I've read many threads in this forum, many of them written by cancer men themselves talking about the testing. My question was about that. What makes you think I haven't tried to manipulate him as well? What makes you think that I'm a defenseless victim in the hands of an abuser? How do you know I'm not a self centered bitch blinded by her ego? People started asking questions about the situation and I replied, that's all. I never asked for advice in this thread did I? I will make my own decision based on my own observations when I feel the time is right. I don't even take advice from my friends why would I take advice from strangers online?
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LadyNeptune
@LadyNeptune
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Posted by queenmy
Posted by LadyNeptune

*comes online and creates thread asking strangers to judge her situation

*gets offended by strangers judging her situation

If you are looking for only opinions that support your pov just say that

Okay, hear me up miss know it all. My question was very clearly about how cancer men in general are in a relrelationship. I've read many threads in this forum, many of them written by cancer men themselves talking about the testing. My question was about that. What makes you think I haven't tried to manipulate him as well? What makes you think that I'm a defenseless victim in the hands of an abuser? How do you know I'm not a self centered bitch blinded by her ego? People started asking questions about the situation and I replied, that's all. I never asked for advice in this thread did I? I will make my own decision based on my own observations when I feel the time is right. I don't even take advice from my friends why would I take advice from strangers online?
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We don't get what we deserve out of life. We get what we demand.

You are willing to accept this mans poor behavior and toxicity based on this idea that cancer men test and play games.

Using astrology to excuse poor behavior is gonna take you far 😂

You did ask for advice. Your literally asking how to be "worthy" enough to pass his test. Don't backpeddle now just cause you don't like what you hear.
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Posted by LadyNeptune
Posted by queenmy

And I'm not really expecting him to trust someone he hasn't met yet when he's been open about having trust issues.

Ok so you haven't even met yet? Wtf is this overthinking and doing the most for someone you haven't even met.

I get that these pandemic times are tough but come on man.

Surely you have better things to do with your time and mental energy then doing backflips for a virtual (I mean that in both senses of the word) stranger.

Your asking why he is so mean and won't block you. Its your boundaries you can control, not his. He won't block you either as you keep coming back to take his punishment and entertain him.
click to expand



I am flabbergasted about these virtual relationships that are taken so seriously without ever having met the person.

It almost voids out the advice that's offered because how can advice be taken in a serious context lol

Virtual strangers can be anyone they want to be!

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@saggurl88
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Posted by queenmy
Posted by LadyNeptune

*comes online and creates thread asking strangers to judge her situation

*gets offended by strangers judging her situation

If you are looking for only opinions that support your pov just say that

Okay, hear me up miss know it all. My question was very clearly about how cancer men in general are in a relrelationship. I've read many threads in this forum, many of them written by cancer men themselves talking about the testing. My question was about that. What makes you think I haven't tried to manipulate him as well? What makes you think that I'm a defenseless victim in the hands of an abuser? How do you know I'm not a self centered bitch blinded by her ego? People started asking questions about the situation and I replied, that's all. I never asked for advice in this thread did I? I will make my own decision based on my own observations when I feel the time is right. I don't even take advice from my friends why would I take advice from strangers online?
click to expand



LMAO
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Vacation Queen
@saggurl88
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Posted by RealDumbo
Posted by LadyNeptune
Posted by queenmy
Posted by LadyNeptune

*comes online and creates thread asking strangers to judge her situation

*gets offended by strangers judging her situation

If you are looking for only opinions that support your pov just say that

Okay, hear me up miss know it all. My question was very clearly about how cancer men in general are in a relrelationship. I've read many threads in this forum, many of them written by cancer men themselves talking about the testing. My question was about that. What makes you think I haven't tried to manipulate him as well? What makes you think that I'm a defenseless victim in the hands of an abuser? How do you know I'm not a self centered bitch blinded by her ego? People started asking questions about the situation and I replied, that's all. I never asked for advice in this thread did I? I will make my own decision based on my own observations when I feel the time is right. I don't even take advice from my friends why would I take advice from strangers online?

We don't get what we deserve out of life. We get what we demand.

You are willing to accept this mans poor behavior and toxicity based on this idea that cancer men test and play games.

Using astrology to excuse poor behavior is gonna take you far 😂

You did ask for advice. Your literally asking how to be "worthy" enough to pass his test. Don't backpeddle now just cause you don't like what you hear.

What's wrong? Are you alright?, you don't seem to be your normal self.
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INCEL!!!!! 😛

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queenmy
@queenmy
6 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 21 · Topics: 2
Posted by bmoon8
Posted by queenmy
Posted by bmoon8
Posted by queenmy
Posted by bmoon8

What sign are you?

What is he “testing” or how is he “testing”?

In other words, what is he doing?

Cancers test to see if you care.

Hi! I'm a virgo. Aquarius moon.

We started off pursuing something romantic but then he started going through some stuff and pulled away. Right before he pulled away I teased him about something, like we would do all the time and he said "you'll just find another guy... wouldn't be too hard". So I think him pulling away was a mix of him not trusting me and what was going on in his life. A lot happened and now we're kinda like "friends" but if I don't talk to him for a while he just says I found new guy, he says that I don't show him enough interest. Up until not long ago, he would make comments about my "new guy" at least three times a day, until we had a huge fight because I asked him to stop saying that (I had to ask him like 4 times). He still made a couple of comments after that fight but he has stopped them. He's suspicious of everything I say or do. He's super closed off most of the time and it almost seems like he doesn't want to get too personal. He doesn't trust me. To me it feels like he's just expecting me to leave out of nowhere. So he's been pushing my buttons to see if I will leave or not. It feels like he's showing me his darkest side on purpose while staying emotionally detached to see if I will stay or not.

Analytical Virgo analyzing. What did you say in a teasing manner? It honestly sounds like he is pushing you away. You’re right. He does not trust you. Without a foundation of trust, there is no true or real relationship here.

Something about me not cuddling with him, that's what I said in a teasing way. There's stuff that contributed to him taking it seriously though. And I'm not really expecting him to trust someone he hasn't met yet when he's been open about having trust issues. It will change when we meet though. He's trying to push me away but I have a hard time believing it's because he really just wants me to go away. He could literally just block me and I'd be gone. That's why I think he's testing me.

Without trust, there is no relationship. Without trust, there is no love. Do you two have plans to meet? I would call him out on what he is doing if you wish to keep this whatever you want to call it going. It’s manipulative and not behavior you should tolerate. It comes across as he is playing games. This can’t really sit well with you, right? Otherwise, have enough self-respect to walk away.
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I have plans to meet him yes but travel restrictions are pretty tight, specially in his country so it's not like I can do it now. None of us can afford to take a month off of work only to spend 20 days in quarantine.

I think people are misunderstanding the situation xD I do call him out on the things I don't like and he respects them. I'm just making efforts to make him trust me and try to show him that I'm not going to run away with the first guy that I see and it doesn't always work so that is why I feel unappreciated sometimes. I never called him out on his games, I will when we meet though. There's no reason for me to do it now, we're not in a relationship nor are we pursuing one right now. I used to be pretty dramatic about this situation but now I'm just trying to keep things light-hearted and see where it goes. I'm trying to hold things until we can meet and then I will make a decision on whether I want this guy or not.
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queenmy
@queenmy
6 Years

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Posted by saggurl88

Well your attitude seems fitting in dealing with Cancer men! 😆 I think you will have him soon enough! I agree to schedule an actual meet up.

Cancers have tons of patience for the possibility of something good, when you can give them a little hell.

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Ahahaha thank you! I'm not sure I'm showing him that side of me though... I actually gave up on being "mean" as it was pushing him away tbh so I'm trying my best to be a ray of sunshine 😂 The only thing is that he's a bit closed off and going through shit so I'm trying to control that attitude you mentioned. We've had some bad fights because of it and it only makes him more defensive so I don't want to ruin things before meeting him.
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queenmy
@queenmy
6 Years

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Posted by saggurl88

Well your attitude seems fitting in dealing with Cancer men! 😆 I think you will have him soon enough! I agree to schedule an actual meet up.

Cancers have tons of patience for the possibility of something good, when you can give them a little hell.

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It's pretty interesting that you mentioned the word patience... you got me thinking about it. I've literally had moments that I just thought "wow... how does he have all this patience for me?" Maybe he does see a possibility for something good. Hmmm thank you 😂
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@saggurl88
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Posted by queenmy
Posted by saggurl88

Well your attitude seems fitting in dealing with Cancer men! 😆 I think you will have him soon enough! I agree to schedule an actual meet up.

Cancers have tons of patience for the possibility of something good, when you can give them a little hell.

Image Not Found

Image Not Found

It's pretty interesting that you mentioned the word patience... you got me thinking about it. I've literally had moments that I just thought "wow... how does he have all this patience for me?" Maybe he does see a possibility for something good. Hmmm thank you 😂
click to expand


I think the arguing with you keeps him busy. The dramatic displays of emotion that both of you put up with makes an interesting dynamic inside of the Virgo/Cancer relationship. Both of you put up with it and Cancer ain't doing anything but being a loner and sitting at home anyways, but at least he can tell that you care and he has an emotional outlet and friend in you.

This is why I think Cancers have so much patience, cause they are barely inside of a relationship anyways when its long distance, but it's still a relationship.

I've known Cancers that almost sit around and wait for something to happen, while enjoying the little bit that's happening in the mean time.
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LadyNeptune
@LadyNeptune
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Comments: 11076 · Posts: 35718 · Topics: 110
Posted by saggurl88
Posted by LadyNeptune
Posted by queenmy

And I'm not really expecting him to trust someone he hasn't met yet when he's been open about having trust issues.

Ok so you haven't even met yet? Wtf is this overthinking and doing the most for someone you haven't even met.

I get that these pandemic times are tough but come on man.

Surely you have better things to do with your time and mental energy then doing backflips for a virtual (I mean that in both senses of the word) stranger.

Your asking why he is so mean and won't block you. Its your boundaries you can control, not his. He won't block you either as you keep coming back to take his punishment and entertain him.

I am flabbergasted about these virtual relationships that are taken so seriously without ever having met the person.

It almost voids out the advice that's offered because how can advice be taken in a serious context lol

Virtual strangers can be anyone they want to be!
click to expand



So true that you can be anyone you want to be when you don't have to meet face to face! And he is choosing to be an asshole. He wakes up every day and chooses violence 😂😂
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@saggurl88
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Posted by LadyNeptune
Posted by saggurl88
Posted by LadyNeptune
Posted by queenmy

And I'm not really expecting him to trust someone he hasn't met yet when he's been open about having trust issues.

Ok so you haven't even met yet? Wtf is this overthinking and doing the most for someone you haven't even met.

I get that these pandemic times are tough but come on man.

Surely you have better things to do with your time and mental energy then doing backflips for a virtual (I mean that in both senses of the word) stranger.

Your asking why he is so mean and won't block you. Its your boundaries you can control, not his. He won't block you either as you keep coming back to take his punishment and entertain him.

I am flabbergasted about these virtual relationships that are taken so seriously without ever having met the person.

It almost voids out the advice that's offered because how can advice be taken in a serious context lol

Virtual strangers can be anyone they want to be!

So true that you can be anyone you want to be when you don't have to meet face to face! And he is choosing to be an asshole. He wakes up every day and chooses violence 😂😂
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lol

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LadyNeptune
@LadyNeptune
10 Years25,000+ Posts

Comments: 11076 · Posts: 35718 · Topics: 110
Posted by queenmy
Posted by LadyNeptune
Posted by queenmy
Posted by LadyNeptune

*comes online and creates thread asking strangers to judge her situation

*gets offended by strangers judging her situation

If you are looking for only opinions that support your pov just say that

Okay, hear me up miss know it all. My question was very clearly about how cancer men in general are in a relrelationship. I've read many threads in this forum, many of them written by cancer men themselves talking about the testing. My question was about that. What makes you think I haven't tried to manipulate him as well? What makes you think that I'm a defenseless victim in the hands of an abuser? How do you know I'm not a self centered bitch blinded by her ego? People started asking questions about the situation and I replied, that's all. I never asked for advice in this thread did I? I will make my own decision based on my own observations when I feel the time is right. I don't even take advice from my friends why would I take advice from strangers online?

We don't get what we deserve out of life. We get what we demand.

You are willing to accept this mans poor behavior and toxicity based on this idea that cancer men test and play games.

Using astrology to excuse poor behavior is gonna take you far 😂

You did ask for advice. Your literally asking how to be "worthy" enough to pass his test. Don't backpeddle now just cause you don't like what you hear.

What—— 😂 please learn how to read. My question was "how worthy is it to pass the test" how-worthy-is-it-to-pass-the-test. In other words "Is it worthy to pass the test" "how will it be after the test". If you read my post you probably noticed how I gave an example of a lady talking about her husband and how he became a very loving partner after the test was over. So my question was about that.

I asked people about their personal experiences and general "tips". If I wanted advice on my particular situation, I would have described it in detail. And I'm certainly not coming on the internet asking about my worthiness, I'm not 13.

And I don't know you seem to be a very active member in an astrology forum. Why are you dismissing astrology? Everyone knows everyone can be toxic and each sign has its own patterns of being toxic. What are you even doing here if you don't believe in astrology? Wasting people's time with the "you deserve better" speech? Just be a therapist then, you'll get paid for it. I can be pretty toxic myself and he puts up with my shit so why shouldn't I put up with his shit too? Making people think that relationships are perfect is toxic advice you know? Life isn't a fairytale darling. And like I said, it's not like I described the situation in detail, you don't know what I did to make him not trust me. You don't know a thing so really... stop judging people.
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Ok lets unpack this, I have some time before my next zoom.

I am not dismissing astrology. I am telling you very clearly that using generic examples of sun sign astrology to excuse toxic behavior is not going to serve you well. You learn how to read 😝

I never said relationships should be perfect or a fairytale. I answered your question of "why doesn't he just block me" to point out that you have power in this situation too and as his behavior towards you causes you to feel "unappreciated" (your words, not mine) you can exercise that power and block him from your life.

Asking for stories and tips you can apply to your situation = advice. Tomato, Tomahto. Same ish.

Then you went on to describe your situation in detail. Asking how to 'pass' his test.

For some reason my answer triggered you when plenty of other people in this thread have had the same take and harsher language at that! The defensiveness just tells me you know there is a grain of truth there.
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LadyNeptune
@LadyNeptune
10 Years25,000+ Posts

Comments: 11076 · Posts: 35718 · Topics: 110
Posted by queenmy
Posted by LadyNeptune
Posted by queenmy
Posted by LadyNeptune
Posted by queenmy
Posted by LadyNeptune

*comes online and creates thread asking strangers to judge her situation

*gets offended by strangers judging her situation

If you are looking for only opinions that support your pov just say that

Okay, hear me up miss know it all. My question was very clearly about how cancer men in general are in a relrelationship. I've read many threads in this forum, many of them written by cancer men themselves talking about the testing. My question was about that. What makes you think I haven't tried to manipulate him as well? What makes you think that I'm a defenseless victim in the hands of an abuser? How do you know I'm not a self centered bitch blinded by her ego? People started asking questions about the situation and I replied, that's all. I never asked for advice in this thread did I? I will make my own decision based on my own observations when I feel the time is right. I don't even take advice from my friends why would I take advice from strangers online?

We don't get what we deserve out of life. We get what we demand.

You are willing to accept this mans poor behavior and toxicity based on this idea that cancer men test and play games.

Using astrology to excuse poor behavior is gonna take you far 😂

You did ask for advice. Your literally asking how to be "worthy" enough to pass his test. Don't backpeddle now just cause you don't like what you hear.

What—— 😂 please learn how to read. My question was "how worthy is it to pass the test" how-worthy-is-it-to-pass-the-test. In other words "Is it worthy to pass the test" "how will it be after the test". If you read my post you probably noticed how I gave an example of a lady talking about her husband and how he became a very loving partner after the test was over. So my question was about that.

I asked people about their personal experiences and general "tips". If I wanted advice on my particular situation, I would have described it in detail. And I'm certainly not coming on the internet asking about my worthiness, I'm not 13.

And I don't know you seem to be a very active member in an astrology forum. Why are you dismissing astrology? Everyone knows everyone can be toxic and each sign has its own patterns of being toxic. What are you even doing here if you don't believe in astrology? Wasting people's time with the "you deserve better" speech? Just be a therapist then, you'll get paid for it. I can be pretty toxic myself and he puts up with my shit so why shouldn't I put up with his shit too? Making people think that relationships are perfect is toxic advice you know? Life isn't a fairytale darling. And like I said, it's not like I described the situation in detail, you don't know what I did to make him not trust me. You don't know a thing so really... stop judging people.

Ok lets unpack this, I have some time before my next zoom.

I am not dismissing astrology. I am telling you very clearly that using generic examples of sun sign astrology to excuse toxic behavior is not going to serve you well. You learn how to read 😝

I never said relationships should be perfect or a fairytale. I answered your question of "why doesn't he just block me" to point out that you have power in this situation too and as his behavior towards you causes you to feel "unappreciated" (your words, not mine) you can exercise that power and block him from your life.

Asking for stories and tips you can apply to your situation = advice. Tomato, Tomahto. Same ish.

Then you went on to describe your situation in detail. Asking how to 'pass' his test.

For some reason my answer triggered you when plenty of other people in this thread have had the same take and harsher language at that! The defensiveness just tells me you know there is a grain of truth there.

Listen, I'm not going to keep arguing with a wall. It's not your answer that triggered me. In all honesty? I can't stand you. Every time I open a thread in this forum your name always shows up in the comments and you always have the same type of attitude and it's the type of attitude that I DESPISE. Every fucking time, you're always in the comments. When I got a notification saying you replied to my thread I rolled my eyes so bad that they almost fell off my face. Do you understand? Don't try to make yourself feel better by believing you triggered something in me because you were right. I really just can't fucking stand you. Get the hell out my thread now!
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I'm less of a wall and more of a brick house.
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queenmy
@queenmy
6 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 21 · Topics: 2
Posted by saggurl88
Posted by queenmy
Posted by saggurl88

Well your attitude seems fitting in dealing with Cancer men! 😆 I think you will have him soon enough! I agree to schedule an actual meet up.

Cancers have tons of patience for the possibility of something good, when you can give them a little hell.

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It's pretty interesting that you mentioned the word patience... you got me thinking about it. I've literally had moments that I just thought "wow... how does he have all this patience for me?" Maybe he does see a possibility for something good. Hmmm thank you 😂

I think the arguing with you keeps him busy. The dramatic displays of emotion that both of you put up with makes an interesting dynamic inside of the Virgo/Cancer relationship. Both of you put up with it and Cancer ain't doing anything but being a loner and sitting at home anyways, but at least he can tell that you care and he has an emotional outlet and friend in you.

This is why I think Cancers have so much patience, cause they are barely inside of a relationship anyways when its long distance, but it's still a relationship.

I've known Cancers that almost sit around and wait for something to happen, while enjoying the little bit that's happening in the mean time.
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What an interesting take on this. I never thought of it like that. I did notice that since I started avoiding arguing he's been trying to push my buttons even harder, maybe he's missing the drama 😂😂 I can almost feel the "you're not going to make a big deal out of this—" from him 😂

I'm still trying to avoid it because I'm aware of the fact that I hurt people with my words and I've hurt him a few times. And then every time I feel bad and I'm always the one trying to make amends but at the same time I think "He's not going to want to talk to me after that ever again" so the days that follow our fights are always very stressful for me.

And you're right he really is the type to just stay home waiting for something to happen. I wonder how I can still give him that little hell you mentioned without fighting? 🤔
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queenmy
@queenmy
6 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 21 · Topics: 2
Posted by bmoon8
Posted by queenmy
Posted by saggurl88
Posted by queenmy
Posted by saggurl88

Well your attitude seems fitting in dealing with Cancer men! 😆 I think you will have him soon enough! I agree to schedule an actual meet up.

Cancers have tons of patience for the possibility of something good, when you can give them a little hell.

Image Not Found

Image Not Found

It's pretty interesting that you mentioned the word patience... you got me thinking about it. I've literally had moments that I just thought "wow... how does he have all this patience for me?" Maybe he does see a possibility for something good. Hmmm thank you 😂

I think the arguing with you keeps him busy. The dramatic displays of emotion that both of you put up with makes an interesting dynamic inside of the Virgo/Cancer relationship. Both of you put up with it and Cancer ain't doing anything but being a loner and sitting at home anyways, but at least he can tell that you care and he has an emotional outlet and friend in you.

This is why I think Cancers have so much patience, cause they are barely inside of a relationship anyways when its long distance, but it's still a relationship.

I've known Cancers that almost sit around and wait for something to happen, while enjoying the little bit that's happening in the mean time.

What an interesting take on this. I never thought of it like that. I did notice that since I started avoiding arguing he's been trying to push my buttons even harder, maybe he's missing the drama 😂😂 I can almost feel the "you're not going to make a big deal out of this—" from him 😂

I'm still trying to avoid it because I'm aware of the fact that I hurt people with my words and I've hurt him a few times. And then every time I feel bad and I'm always the one trying to make amends but at the same time I think "He's not going to want to talk to me after that ever again" so the days that follow our fights are always very stressful for me.

And you're right he really is the type to just stay home waiting for something to happen. I wonder how I can still give him that little hell you mentioned without fighting? 🤔

Why don’t you just tell him that you know he’s pushing your buttons and you’re just not going to go there. Ask him to stop?
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Hmmmm you gave me an idea 🤔 Thank you 😂