@Lilianni
11 Years1,000+ Posts
Cancer Man Acting Cuddly in an F-Buddy Situation?
What Does a Cuddly Cancer Man in a F Buddy Situation Usually Feel?
A Cancer man acting cuddly in a friends with benefits situation often shows emotional attachment and a desire for closeness. His behavior may indicate he cares more than he lets on, reflecting his nurturing and protective nature. He might be seeking reassurance and connection, even if he appears distant or casual on the surface.
You need the boundaries. He doesn’t.
Cancer can sleep with someone all weekend, cuddle, feed you and then ghost you for a month and do it all again.
Cancer is in the moment. Why should you involve his emotions in an attachment when he can just have a physical connection?
Yeah like the other people have said, it’s an emotional thing. That seems blurry but it’s not.
stay grounded
So...why shouldn't he act cuddly? That it's a fwb doesn't mean he can't be cuddly when he feels the need to? I think you are looking into it more than you should.......Do you want him to be your boyfriend?
No. We’re too incompatible. I just want to know why this is happening
You need the boundaries. He doesn’t.
Cancer can sleep with someone all weekend, cuddle, feed you and then ghost you for a month and do it all again.
Cancer is in the moment. Why should you involve his emotions in an attachment when he can just have a physical connection?
I just think it’s weird that it seems that there IS emotion involved and was wanting to know why. But I guess that’s normal and I’m thinking too much into it
Yeah like the other people have said, it’s an emotional thing. That seems blurry but it’s not.
stay grounded
Thank you for your words.
You need the boundaries. He doesn’t.
Cancer can sleep with someone all weekend, cuddle, feed you and then ghost you for a month and do it all again.
Cancer is in the moment. Why should you involve his emotions in an attachment when he can just have a physical connection?
I just think it’s weird that it seems that there IS emotion involved and was wanting to know why. But I guess that’s normal and I’m thinking too much into it. I just want to understand why.
click to expand
Cuddling is not necessarilly an emotional act. It's a comforting act and people like to touch. If you feel it's leading you on don't do it.
Cuddling is just part of after care for the physical act of fucking. It says nothing significant about his mental process or feelings.
If you are wondering if things are changing for him then, ask.
I met this Cancer sun, Cancer Mercury, Cancer Venus man on Tinder in December 2019 while in college and as the title implies, we’ve been fuck buddies since then. We were never really friends and the only times we would get together was to have sex. We haven’t had sex consecutively or constantly due to either one of us getting into relationships, personal whim, or just losing contact—but we’re still here to this day.
When we first hooked up, he was rude and dismissive. But the next day, he said that he really liked my kitty and kept me around. His sun and Venus are in my 8th house so I would be intimidated by him and easily turned on by the things he did. The things he would do would get under my skin and the sex was phenomenal, the best I’ve ever had and he filled in an almost secret sexual fantasy. Not only was he sexually dominant but also felt psychologically dominant and that felt so intimidating but good to me. I was sexually obsessed with him—he was perfect and my body would physically/psychologically crave sex with him. He began acting more caring and would reach over to cuddle and I was pretty reserved with him just because I was intimidated. We had sex maybe once a month and lost contact after the summer semester.
By 2019, I was transitioning out of my hoe phase but kept thinking of getting back with the best sexual partner I’ve ever had. I mustered up the courage to add him on social media and we hit it off right away and started having sex again. He’d be moody sometimes so there were periods where we didn’t have sex but I was always available (per my schedule) whenever he’d hit me up. I let him know that I was going to get into my first relationship and the last time we hooked up before it became official, these bullet shells came out of my shirt and he commented that he likes shooting too. After that relationship was over (about 5 months), we start having sex again and the first time I’m back, I go into his bathroom and see the same bullet shells from my shirt on his counter top. He goes into the bathroom afterwards then I go in a second time and the bullets see no longer there. I imagined he developed some sort of attachment to them as if “this is to one of the longest-standing fwbs I’ve had before losing her” and then got embarrassed then I saw it and threw them away. We fool around a couple times more, and during this period I felt like he was trying to distance our situation into more of a friendship. I get into another relationship a few months later in 2020 and after my bf passed away in 2021, I started hooking up with him again. Now I’m no longer afraid to cuddle back, but I still find it weird to do that with someone who’s only around for sex. At this point, the only person I have sex with are either going to be my significant other at the time or him while I’m single (I’m not interested in multiple partners anymore). He still keeps/finds a few here and there. The first time we hook up after my bf’s death, he over dressed and seemed like he was looking forward to hooking up again (he works from home.. and I was meeting him at home). The next times, he seemed very interested in having me stay the night and meet up with him soon. When we did, he’d reach over to cuddle, he’d remember little things about me that we discussed in the past. We had a somewhat intimate pillow talk once. This might be my 8th house being activated but I just find it weird that he’s acting... like a Cancer lol. I wanna know what he might be thinking or feeling.
I think we both have pretty good mental boundaries and know not to step over the fwb line.
Had similar relationship with a Cancer. Not as long or as back and forth. They cuddle. I call it being in the cocoon, lol. Feels good. But, I was not stupid in thinking it was about me. It was his personality. Intense pillow talk revealing deep secrets, yeah. Sexual fantasies explored, yeah... first time I had quality BDSM. It was fun, an experience. Could it have been more, idk, idc. It was fun. Cancer was too moody for my disposition. I struggled so bad with possibility of endless sexual fantasies being explored and tip-toeing on his moodiness as a life-long prospect. I passed.
You don't know him yet really. That day-to-day living together, lawd, it's totally and completely different from being fuck-buddies. Don't be short-sighted.
If you want to see if you two will work ask if he wants to start trying for a relationship since the sex is so good and see what he says.
You need the boundaries. He doesn’t.
Cancer can sleep with someone all weekend, cuddle, feed you and then ghost you for a month and do it all again.
Cancer is in the moment. Why should you involve his emotions in an attachment when he can just have a physical connection?
I just think it’s weird that it seems that there IS emotion involved and was wanting to know why. But I guess that’s normal and I’m thinking too much into it
click to expand
I'd like to know how old you are, because you seem really, really immature. Of course a Cancer man, even with the FWB understanding, will develop feelings. Most anyone would. It's human nature. You don't have sex, the most intimate form of connection with someone, unless he/she is a complete closet queen/king, and he/she is a total hoe-bag, slut, and not develop an emotional connection. Even people I dated predominantly for sex, I ended up with some form of emotional attachment. I remember one in particular, we danced at the clubs all the time, she took lessons and was really good...back in the day. Eventually, even though I didn't have long term intentions with her, we ended up having a strong sexual relationship. She wanted it to be more serious than I did, and even though she made that clear, I wasn't going to make a commitment. When she eventually cut it all off, I missed the companionship, and of course the sexual connection badly. We just hit it off that way. It's nearly impossible to separate something like sex, and an emotional connection, for a Cancer. They are one in the same. Unless you're a complete dirt bag of course.
You need the boundaries. He doesn’t.
Cancer can sleep with someone all weekend, cuddle, feed you and then ghost you for a month and do it all again.
Cancer is in the moment. Why should you involve his emotions in an attachment when he can just have a physical connection?
I just think it’s weird that it seems that there IS emotion involved and was wanting to know why. But I guess that’s normal and I’m thinking too much into it
I'd like to know how old you are, because you seem really, really immature. Of course a Cancer man, even with the FWB understanding, will develop feelings. Most anyone would. It's human nature. You don't have sex, the most intimate form of connection with someone, unless he/she is a complete closet queen/king, and he/she is a total hoe-bag, slut, and not develop an emotional connection. Even people I dated predominantly for sex, I ended up with some form of emotional attachment. I remember one in particular, we danced at the clubs all the time, she took lessons and was really good...back in the day. Eventually, even though I didn't have long term intentions with her, we ended up having a strong sexual relationship. She wanted it to be more serious than I did, and even though she made that clear, I wasn't going to make a commitment. When she eventually cut it all off, I missed the companionship, and of course the sexual connection badly. We just hit it off that way. It's nearly impossible to separate something like sex, and an emotional connection, for a Cancer. They are one in the same. Unless you're a complete dirt bag of course.
click to expand
What was the big deal of being in a relationship then, if you were practically in one anyways?
You need the boundaries. He doesn’t.
Cancer can sleep with someone all weekend, cuddle, feed you and then ghost you for a month and do it all again.
Cancer is in the moment. Why should you involve his emotions in an attachment when he can just have a physical connection?
I just think it’s weird that it seems that there IS emotion involved and was wanting to know why. But I guess that’s normal and I’m thinking too much into it
I'd like to know how old you are, because you seem really, really immature. Of course a Cancer man, even with the FWB understanding, will develop feelings. Most anyone would. It's human nature. You don't have sex, the most intimate form of connection with someone, unless he/she is a complete closet queen/king, and he/she is a total hoe-bag, slut, and not develop an emotional connection. Even people I dated predominantly for sex, I ended up with some form of emotional attachment. I remember one in particular, we danced at the clubs all the time, she took lessons and was really good...back in the day. Eventually, even though I didn't have long term intentions with her, we ended up having a strong sexual relationship. She wanted it to be more serious than I did, and even though she made that clear, I wasn't going to make a commitment. When she eventually cut it all off, I missed the companionship, and of course the sexual connection badly. We just hit it off that way. It's nearly impossible to separate something like sex, and an emotional connection, for a Cancer. They are one in the same. Unless you're a complete dirt bag of course.
What was the big deal of being in a relationship then, if you were practically in one anyways?
click to expand
I don't understand the question. I thought I made that clear. She was a good dancer, and was great sexually, but wasn't the type of girl I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. Some things you just can't describe in words, it's the image of the person, and how they make you feel when you're around them. In that situation, most of the hanging out we did in clubs was in a group of 6-8 people, all mutual friends.
You need the boundaries. He doesn’t.
Cancer can sleep with someone all weekend, cuddle, feed you and then ghost you for a month and do it all again.
Cancer is in the moment. Why should you involve his emotions in an attachment when he can just have a physical connection?
I just think it’s weird that it seems that there IS emotion involved and was wanting to know why. But I guess that’s normal and I’m thinking too much into it
I'd like to know how old you are, because you seem really, really immature. Of course a Cancer man, even with the FWB understanding, will develop feelings. Most anyone would. It's human nature. You don't have sex, the most intimate form of connection with someone, unless he/she is a complete closet queen/king, and he/she is a total hoe-bag, slut, and not develop an emotional connection. Even people I dated predominantly for sex, I ended up with some form of emotional attachment. I remember one in particular, we danced at the clubs all the time, she took lessons and was really good...back in the day. Eventually, even though I didn't have long term intentions with her, we ended up having a strong sexual relationship. She wanted it to be more serious than I did, and even though she made that clear, I wasn't going to make a commitment. When she eventually cut it all off, I missed the companionship, and of course the sexual connection badly. We just hit it off that way. It's nearly impossible to separate something like sex, and an emotional connection, for a Cancer. They are one in the same. Unless you're a complete dirt bag of course.
What was the big deal of being in a relationship then, if you were practically in one anyways?
I don't understand the question. I thought I made that clear. She was a good dancer, and was great sexually, but wasn't the type of girl I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. Some things you just can't describe in words, it's the image of the person, and how they make you feel when you're around them. In that situation, most of the hanging out we did in clubs was in a group of 6-8 people, all mutual friends.
click to expand
Oh ok, I see. That makes sense. I read all the good times, but not in a partying/just sex way. You saying you missed the companionship made me think there was more then just that.
I met this Cancer sun, Cancer Mercury, Cancer Venus man on Tinder in December 2019 while in college and as the title implies, we’ve been fuck buddies since then. We were never really friends and the only times we would get together was to have sex. We haven’t had sex consecutively or constantly due to either one of us getting into relationships, personal whim, or just losing contact—but we’re still here to this day.
When we first hooked up, he was rude and dismissive. But the next day, he said that he really liked my kitty and kept me around. His sun and Venus are in my 8th house so I would be intimidated by him and easily turned on by the things he did. The things he would do would get under my skin and the sex was phenomenal, the best I’ve ever had and he filled in an almost secret sexual fantasy. Not only was he sexually dominant but also felt psychologically dominant and that felt so intimidating but good to me. I was sexually obsessed with him—he was perfect and my body would physically/psychologically crave sex with him. He began acting more caring and would reach over to cuddle and I was pretty reserved with him just because I was intimidated. We had sex maybe once a month and lost contact after the summer semester.
By 2019, I was transitioning out of my hoe phase but kept thinking of getting back with the best sexual partner I’ve ever had. I mustered up the courage to add him on social media and we hit it off right away and started having sex again. He’d be moody sometimes so there were periods where we didn’t have sex but I was always available (per my schedule) whenever he’d hit me up. I let him know that I was going to get into my first relationship and the last time we hooked up before it became official, these bullet shells came out of my shirt and he commented that he likes shooting too. After that relationship was over (about 5 months), we start having sex again and the first time I’m back, I go into his bathroom and see the same bullet shells from my shirt on his counter top. He goes into the bathroom afterwards then I go in a second time and the bullets see no longer there. I imagined he developed some sort of attachment to them as if “this is to one of the longest-standing fwbs I’ve had before losing her” and then got embarrassed then I saw it and threw them away. We fool around a couple times more, and during this period I felt like he was trying to distance our situation into more of a friendship. I get into another relationship a few months later in 2020 and after my bf passed away in 2021, I started hooking up with him again. Now I’m no longer afraid to cuddle back, but I still find it weird to do that with someone who’s only around for sex. At this point, the only person I have sex with are either going to be my significant other at the time or him while I’m single (I’m not interested in multiple partners anymore). He still keeps/finds a few here and there. The first time we hook up after my bf’s death, he over dressed and seemed like he was looking forward to hooking up again (he works from home.. and I was meeting him at home). The next times, he seemed very interested in having me stay the night and meet up with him soon. When we did, he’d reach over to cuddle, he’d remember little things about me that we discussed in the past. We had a somewhat intimate pillow talk once. This might be my 8th house being activated but I just find it weird that he’s acting... like a Cancer lol. I wanna know what he might be thinking or feeling.
I think we both have pretty good mental boundaries and know not to step over the fwb line.
Had similar relationship with a Cancer. Not as long or as back and forth. They cuddle. I call it being in the cocoon, lol. Feels good. But, I was not stupid in thinking it was about me. It was his personality. Intense pillow talk revealing deep secrets, yeah. Sexual fantasies explored, yeah... first time I had quality BDSM. It was fun, an experience. Could it have been more, idk, idc. It was fun. Cancer was too moody for my disposition. I struggled so bad with possibility of endless sexual fantasies being explored and tip-toeing on his moodiness as a life-long prospect. I passed.
You don't know him yet really. That day-to-day living together, lawd, it's totally and completely different from being fuck-buddies. Don't be short-sighted.
click to expand
That’s why I want to know. I don’t want to be with him I want to know why he was doing that or what would motivate him by collecting other people’s experiences
You need the boundaries. He doesn’t.
Cancer can sleep with someone all weekend, cuddle, feed you and then ghost you for a month and do it all again.
Cancer is in the moment. Why should you involve his emotions in an attachment when he can just have a physical connection?
I just think it’s weird that it seems that there IS emotion involved and was wanting to know why. But I guess that’s normal and I’m thinking too much into it
I'd like to know how old you are, because you seem really, really immature. Of course a Cancer man, even with the FWB understanding, will develop feelings. Most anyone would. It's human nature. You don't have sex, the most intimate form of connection with someone, unless he/she is a complete closet queen/king, and he/she is a total hoe-bag, slut, and not develop an emotional connection. Even people I dated predominantly for sex, I ended up with some form of emotional attachment. I remember one in particular, we danced at the clubs all the time, she took lessons and was really good...back in the day. Eventually, even though I didn't have long term intentions with her, we ended up having a strong sexual relationship. She wanted it to be more serious than I did, and even though she made that clear, I wasn't going to make a commitment. When she eventually cut it all off, I missed the companionship, and of course the sexual connection badly. We just hit it off that way. It's nearly impossible to separate something like sex, and an emotional connection, for a Cancer. They are one in the same. Unless you're a complete dirt bag of course.
click to expand
No need to be rude. I just want to better understand
I met this Cancer sun, Cancer Mercury, Cancer Venus man on Tinder in December 2019 while in college and as the title implies, we’ve been fuck buddies since then. We were never really friends and the only times we would get together was to have sex. We haven’t had sex consecutively or constantly due to either one of us getting into relationships, personal whim, or just losing contact—but we’re still here to this day.
When we first hooked up, he was rude and dismissive. But the next day, he said that he really liked my kitty and kept me around. His sun and Venus are in my 8th house so I would be intimidated by him and easily turned on by the things he did. The things he would do would get under my skin and the sex was phenomenal, the best I’ve ever had and he filled in an almost secret sexual fantasy. Not only was he sexually dominant but also felt psychologically dominant and that felt so intimidating but good to me. I was sexually obsessed with him—he was perfect and my body would physically/psychologically crave sex with him. He began acting more caring and would reach over to cuddle and I was pretty reserved with him just because I was intimidated. We had sex maybe once a month and lost contact after the summer semester.
By 2019, I was transitioning out of my hoe phase but kept thinking of getting back with the best sexual partner I’ve ever had. I mustered up the courage to add him on social media and we hit it off right away and started having sex again. He’d be moody sometimes so there were periods where we didn’t have sex but I was always available (per my schedule) whenever he’d hit me up. I let him know that I was going to get into my first relationship and the last time we hooked up before it became official, these bullet shells came out of my shirt and he commented that he likes shooting too. After that relationship was over (about 5 months), we start having sex again and the first time I’m back, I go into his bathroom and see the same bullet shells from my shirt on his counter top. He goes into the bathroom afterwards then I go in a second time and the bullets see no longer there. I imagined he developed some sort of attachment to them as if “this is to one of the longest-standing fwbs I’ve had before losing her” and then got embarrassed then I saw it and threw them away. We fool around a couple times more, and during this period I felt like he was trying to distance our situation into more of a friendship. I get into another relationship a few months later in 2020 and after my bf passed away in 2021, I started hooking up with him again. Now I’m no longer afraid to cuddle back, but I still find it weird to do that with someone who’s only around for sex. At this point, the only person I have sex with are either going to be my significant other at the time or him while I’m single (I’m not interested in multiple partners anymore). He still keeps/finds a few here and there. The first time we hook up after my bf’s death, he over dressed and seemed like he was looking forward to hooking up again (he works from home.. and I was meeting him at home). The next times, he seemed very interested in having me stay the night and meet up with him soon. When we did, he’d reach over to cuddle, he’d remember little things about me that we discussed in the past. We had a somewhat intimate pillow talk once. This might be my 8th house being activated but I just find it weird that he’s acting... like a Cancer lol. I wanna know what he might be thinking or feeling.
I think we both have pretty good mental boundaries and know not to step over the fwb line.
Had similar relationship with a Cancer. Not as long or as back and forth. They cuddle. I call it being in the cocoon, lol. Feels good. But, I was not stupid in thinking it was about me. It was his personality. Intense pillow talk revealing deep secrets, yeah. Sexual fantasies explored, yeah... first time I had quality BDSM. It was fun, an experience. Could it have been more, idk, idc. It was fun. Cancer was too moody for my disposition. I struggled so bad with possibility of endless sexual fantasies being explored and tip-toeing on his moodiness as a life-long prospect. I passed.
You don't know him yet really. That day-to-day living together, lawd, it's totally and completely different from being fuck-buddies. Don't be short-sighted.
That’s why I want to know. I don’t want to be with him I want to know why he was doing that or what would motivate him by collecting other people’s experiences
click to expand
When I wanted to know why, I did the same. But, I also analyzed their birth charts. When I saw he was a triple Cancer... Yeah, no.
That overrode the feedback I recieved in my thread, lol.
I am a Cancer, if I like someone enough to kiss them then I want to cuddle all over them. It means nothing extra.
You need the boundaries. He doesn’t.
Cancer can sleep with someone all weekend, cuddle, feed you and then ghost you for a month and do it all again.
Cancer is in the moment. Why should you involve his emotions in an attachment when he can just have a physical connection?
I just think it’s weird that it seems that there IS emotion involved and was wanting to know why. But I guess that’s normal and I’m thinking too much into it
I'd like to know how old you are, because you seem really, really immature. Of course a Cancer man, even with the FWB understanding, will develop feelings. Most anyone would. It's human nature. You don't have sex, the most intimate form of connection with someone, unless he/she is a complete closet queen/king, and he/she is a total hoe-bag, slut, and not develop an emotional connection. Even people I dated predominantly for sex, I ended up with some form of emotional attachment. I remember one in particular, we danced at the clubs all the time, she took lessons and was really good...back in the day. Eventually, even though I didn't have long term intentions with her, we ended up having a strong sexual relationship. She wanted it to be more serious than I did, and even though she made that clear, I wasn't going to make a commitment. When she eventually cut it all off, I missed the companionship, and of course the sexual connection badly. We just hit it off that way. It's nearly impossible to separate something like sex, and an emotional connection, for a Cancer. They are one in the same. Unless you're a complete dirt bag of course.
What was the big deal of being in a relationship then, if you were practically in one anyways?
I don't understand the question. I thought I made that clear. She was a good dancer, and was great sexually, but wasn't the type of girl I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. Some things you just can't describe in words, it's the image of the person, and how they make you feel when you're around them. In that situation, most of the hanging out we did in clubs was in a group of 6-8 people, all mutual friends.
click to expand
So you’re actually the total “hoe-bag/slut”
I am a Cancer, if I like someone enough to kiss them then I want to cuddle all over them. It means nothing extra.
Thank you for the feedback!
My question is, why do you want to "just know?"
If you were not developing feelings for him, you wouldn't want to know anything and wouldn't realize he was overdressed for anything.
Just a warning: if you cuddle back and get comfortable, you probably won't hear back from him again.
Understand what is happening deep within you - ask yourself why you want to know - and then start from the beginning where you felt intimidated and turned on until now. How have your feelings towards the situation changed?
No cancer man can stay in a FWB for any long amount of time. Like the crab senses his shell is his home, the cancer will seek to settle down soon.
Decide what you want to do quickly. We live life in a moment. Don't drag out a situation that will cripple your heart in the future - it's no fun at all.
And remember, the 8th rules other people's resources. But even more, the 8th rules death.
What are you paying for la petite mort, ma chérie?
I'm a Cancer moon and I'd definitely say he's starting to feel something more for you. The best thing to do is talk to him and find out.
My question is, why do you want to "just know?"
If you were not developing feelings for him, you wouldn't want to know anything and wouldn't realize he was overdressed for anything.
Just a warning: if you cuddle back and get comfortable, you probably won't hear back from him again.
Understand what is happening deep within you - ask yourself why you want to know - and then start from the beginning where you felt intimidated and turned on until now. How have your feelings towards the situation changed?
No cancer man can stay in a FWB for any long amount of time. Like the crab senses his shell is his home, the cancer will seek to settle down soon.
Decide what you want to do quickly. We live life in a moment. Don't drag out a situation that will cripple your heart in the future - it's no fun at all.
And remember, the 8th rules other people's resources. But even more, the 8th rules death.
What are you paying for la petite mort, ma chérie?
Oh no. So the reason why I noticed was because he mentioned that he was overdressed while we were just chilling on the couch when I first went back to his place. He mentioned it 2 times and I gave him a good 1 hour or so before heading to his place and he was working from home on that day, video conferencing not needed. I didn’t really acknowledge at the time but after a few days I was thinking “Was he trying to tell me something?” And was just kind of looking more into his behavior since then.
As far as having an 8th house affect, when we first hooked up, the feeling was intense. Nowadays, he recently put an arm over and pulled me in, and in my head I was actually looking for that 8th house feeling but felt fine. I felt in control of myself and wasn’t feeling anything or overthinking. Before, I felt like he was hard to read and he had a way of reading me. Now, I feel like I can do the same back and no longer feel like he can get under my skin. The psychological field feels even now and I feel like my own person.
I guess I’m just taking a question and overthinking (I tend to do that a lot) but the reason why I was looking for answers was to figure out what might be motivating him to.. act like a cancer? Act more cancer-ish lately?
I think you want more
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I met this Cancer sun, Cancer Mercury, Cancer Venus man on Tinder in December 2019 while in college and as the title implies, we’ve been fuck buddies since then. We were never really friends and the only times we would get together was to have sex. We haven’t had sex consecutively or constantly due to either one of us getting into relationships, personal whim, or just losing contact—but we’re still here to this day.
When we first hooked up, he was rude and dismissive. But the next day, he said that he really liked my kitty and kept me around. His sun and Venus are in my 8th house so I would be intimidated by him and easily turned on by the things he did. The things he would do would get under my skin and the sex was phenomenal, the best I’ve ever had and he filled in an almost secret sexual fantasy. Not only was he sexually dominant but also felt psychologically dominant and that felt so intimidating but good to me. I was sexually obsessed with him—he was perfect and my body would physically/psychologically crave sex with him. He began acting more caring and would reach over to cuddle and I was pretty reserved with him just because I was intimidated. We had sex maybe once a month and lost contact after the summer semester.
By 2019, I was transitioning out of my hoe phase but kept thinking of getting back with the best sexual partner I’ve ever had. I mustered up the courage to add him on social media and we hit it off right away and started having sex again. He’d be moody sometimes so there were periods where we didn’t have sex but I was always available (per my schedule) whenever he’d hit me up. I let him know that I was going to get into my first relationship and the last time we hooked up before it became official, these bullet shells came out of my shirt and he commented that he likes shooting too. After that relationship was over (about 5 months), we start having sex again and the first time I’m back, I go into his bathroom and see the same bullet shells from my shirt on his counter top. He goes into the bathroom afterwards then I go in a second time and the bullets see no longer there. I imagined he developed some sort of attachment to them as if “this is to one of the longest-standing fwbs I’ve had before losing her” and then got embarrassed then I saw it and threw them away. We fool around a couple times more, and during this period I felt like he was trying to distance our situation into more of a friendship. I get into another relationship a few months later in 2020 and after my bf passed away in 2021, I started hooking up with him again. Now I’m no longer afraid to cuddle back, but I still find it weird to do that with someone who’s only around for sex. At this point, the only person I have sex with are either going to be my significant other at the time or him while I’m single (I’m not interested in multiple partners anymore). He still keeps/finds a few here and there. The first time we hook up after my bf’s death, he over dressed and seemed like he was looking forward to hooking up again (he works from home.. and I was meeting him at home). The next times, he seemed very interested in having me stay the night and meet up with him soon. When we did, he’d reach over to cuddle, he’d remember little things about me that we discussed in the past. We had a somewhat intimate pillow talk once. This might be my 8th house being activated but I just find it weird that he’s acting... like a Cancer lol. I wanna know what he might be thinking or feeling.
I think we both have pretty good mental boundaries and know not to step over the fwb line.