How Independent Are You?

Seems to me some Libras relish their freedom and try to be as indepent as possible---possibly tying into their unique personalities.

Other Libras are the clingiest people I've ever seen!

(Er, is this both? One of those scale things? . . .)

I think your Venus comes into play here. Given that we are talking about love as a whole, really.

Venus in Aquarius is very different from Venus in Sag or Virgo, I would say.

I am very independant but when I am involved with someone I care about I relenquish a lot of my independance by choice. I choose to move foreward with them rather than have them come along if that makes any sense. I wouldn't call it co-dependance or cleangyness but there is a real sense of partnership and mutual involvement.

I think part of the draw to libra is that we are both. We are independent and interdependent from moment to moment.

When we are off balance, we cling. When we feel supported and adored, we don't.

We are very careful who we give our hearts too because our lover usually has our emotional well-being in their hands. They have control to build us or break us. I think because are so vulnerable to our lover, we are very careful who we give that control too.

A Libra who has been burned too many times, loses the ability to surrender.

I think part of the draw to libra is that we are both. We are independent and interdependent from moment to moment.

When we are off balance, we cling. When we feel supported and adored, we don't.

We are very careful who we give our hearts too because our lover usually has our emotional well-being in their hands. They have control to build us or break us. I think because are so vulnerable to our lover, we are very careful who we give that control too.

A Libra who has been burned too many times, loses the ability to surrender.

sorry my puter did something funny.

I totally agree with LS, on this. Initially they hold their independence and they don't become clingy but become intertwined with the person they finally give their hearts to. If it is a scorp (scorp woman/libra guy) it can be the deepest connection known. Kennyg in your case it sounds the same for a Libra girl/scorp guy as well.

A 2-12 relationship is very healing and gentle.

LS, a 2-12 relationship—

EVERYTHING helps. Come to think of it, the most clingy Libra I knew was in panic mode at the time. It seems Libras PREFER indepence / freedom, yet show their caring for you,

Another important thing to note is that a Libra will use their independance to prove something if they have too. I think it is more common with Libra guys, if they have a girl that is way clingy they will try and push them away a little.

*rolls eyes* these guys are like playing with chemicals...you have to have the right mix of this and the right mix of that to get it to "work".

Imagine trying to be in a r/ship with a Libra and you haven't been to this site!!! OMG lol

Yeah, that is probably why the outcome is so rewarding when you get their hearts. I love the fact they make a person work so hard to get them. I am thinking of highering my standars as well... LOL!!! 🙂 Joking!!! It can suck!!! I honestly don't think they have a clue of what we go through in the persuit process. If you bring it to their attention they feel terrible about it.

Yes but Chatz ... we aren't all like that. You have damaged goods on your hands.

When we like someone and are ready, we act like HP's new libra. We really do. We do most of the work.

We won't be with you everyday, cause that is crazy and everyone needs downtime but we are pretty reliable, dependable, and just nice. There isn't a lot of mystery.

If we are broken, as your guy(s) appear to be, you are in for a hell ride.

If we are ready, we send you little notes or emails with stuff you would be interested in, we pick you up little presents, we listen to you for hours, and just kind of dote a lot. Then when we feel too close, we go off for a few days to rebalance our lives. Then we come back.

Ls, yup that is what it boils down to. I guess, once they make up their minds they like you. It is hell with a broken one (my friend), however my ex sent me through some of the similar things, but not for long and once he accepted I wanted more. It was heaven... (However, he wasn't damaged - no recent break ups) so yeah...

LS, I love the way you guys keep it in prespective, and take out the emotions.

LS, I love the way you guys keep it in prespective, and take out the emotions.

How do you mean? The fact that we rebalance and keep things in prespective?

🙂

what is happening with yerrr libra boy anyway?

QS, I'll loan you my chemistry set.

***How do you mean? The fact that we rebalance and keep things in prespective?***

Exactly, the facts are the facts outside of the emotional stuff. Keep us focused on the facts.

***what is happening with yerrr libra boy anyway?***

Who knows, haven't heard from him or contacted him since my gutsy stunt... Oh, since I invited him to the movie and when he said he had plans that day, told him it was OK, I was going with someone else, but thanked him for responding...

OK, you tell me.

***QS, I'll loan you my chemistry set***

Atom as long as you are attached to it, bring it on... 🙂

Was asking him to the movies your gutsy stunt?

Is he with the Sag again? He could be keeping his distance as respect to her.

I had a bit of cookie angst last week and may have missed some happenings.

(Mad Professor mixing away concoction for QS): BOOM!

QS, Hang in there for Libra Guy's response. We'd all like to know, y'know.

QS

Letters with heavy content and where you cannot hear the tone of someone's voice and how they meant it might be difficult to respond to. I mean, unless you can really tell if someone is saying stuff with a sweet voice and a smile or not, it might be very difficult for him to know how to take it...

He may never respond but only because he does not know how you meant it exactly...

Libra, SO true. I have one friend I can NEVER write e-mails too because she ALWAYS misinterprets them, "hearing" it in an entirely different tone of voice. Of course, she's a Pisces, so what do you excpect?

Best to confront face-to-face, then you can do damage control there and then...

And another thing, but I don't know how other Libras deal with this one: if I have been given negative information about myself (a lecture for want of words), I will give you your air time, I will take it all in, respect you by LISTENING to you (the air time) but then don't expect an apology necessarily. The fact that I have taken it lying down should show humbleness (e.g. I have allowed you to tell me off like I'm a small child) and therefore do not ask for more.

Then all should go back to normal after that...

****Was asking him to the movies your gutsy stunt?***

No, you missed it on my "Moving on" post. I was really looking for your response to that too. I will repost that one on here just for you.

***Is he with the Sag again? He could be keeping his distance as respect to her. ***

Nope, and this is the longest time they have been apart since I have known him... Keeping busy though, he keeps adding projects to his schedule. I think he is trying to heal and replace any guilt or emotional stuff left over from his relationship with the ex...

Just for you LS. Here is my recent stunt:

OK. guys, I might have messed up here. Blame the alcohol... I went out last night to a friends home coming party got kind of tipsy, and horney, which for me go hand in hand... So I did the unthinkable.... Something I definitely wouldn't have had the courage to do sober...

I drive over to my Libra friend's house and walk right up and ring the bell at 2am. Just was lonely didn't want to be home alone and just wanted to be with him. His roomate opened the door and let me in. I walked straight to his room and opened the door (a little nervous as he could have had someone in there). He and his roomate have two separate entrances... I didnt' care er alcohol level and horniness. He jumped rolled over and exclaimed "who is that!" Then he looked at me and said, hey.

I silently striped and got in bed with him without a word.. I laid on his chest he rubbed my hair, still we didn't speak. He just sai good morning... I said nothing, then you know the rest. Afterward I told him," I am a littl intoxicated, I know it is inappropriate to just pop up, but I wanted to be with him and I couldn't help it. He sighed and said... "It is OK" We slept we woke in th morning together, showered and went on about our separate days....

QS, lol, fun to read it again! You don't need no chemistry set!

😉

***(Mad Professor mixing away concoction for QS): BOOM✨**

You are such a charmer Atom!!!

***QS, Hang in there for Libra Guy's response. We'd all like to know, y'know.***

If it comes I will be happy to share, if not oh well...

***He may never respond but only because he does not know how you meant it exactly...***

Well, in a couple of weeks if he doesn't respond or contact me then I have my answer, which includes the friendship as well.

If he does contact me with out an answer then I will ask him how he felt about it. Oh, believe me I won't go for too long without an answer. I need to take a couple weeks to eliminate some of the rest of these emotions, as now I am afraid I am really losing interest.

***And another thing, but I don't know how other Libras deal with this one: if I have been given negative information about myself (a lecture for want of words), I will give you your air time, I will take it all in, respect you by LISTENING to you (the air time) but then don't expect an apology necessarily. The fact that I have taken it lying down should show humbleness (e.g. I have allowed you to tell me off like I'm a small child) and therefore do not ask for more.****

Libra, have you read the email I posted? I truly didn't think it was in any tone, but sincere, honest and empathetic, atleast that is the responses I got from those who read it.

When I talk to him face-to-face I expect to have the same tone in person. I am not at all angry or upset with him, just feel how I feel and have no problem with expressing it when these emotions are out of it.. Y'know. I will always care about him as I first, treasure him as a friend.

Atom, I know I am a handful and some just can't handle it...

Yes, it was beautiful!

But you've gone over to see him so he still knows you love him so it's OK.

Yet no response from LS, where are you dang it.... More cookies—

Queen, you are wise to let the emotions cool and I think you've reached good conclusions on this guy. Handful? Yes! Spice of life!

Libra, yes, I have clarified my position so there isn't any confusion about me. Just don't know if he will willingly let me know how he feels as I know there is some damage per my email. I don't think he is available emotionally right now, was just wondering how he feels about me in general since my sudden change of feelings. If it scares him, if it will damage our friendship etc.

Atom, yes sir Spice of Life indeed, should be my middle name. Everyone can't handle it though.

Well we won't stand before you and say 'I Love You' because, and perhaps I should only speak for my Libra self for once, I consider it fake. So you'll have to read between the lines. Plus you can also break through his silence if he is worth it...

(The don't give up or in approach)

Woah Libra, love, I don't quite think it is that yet. Not in a romantic way. As a friend yes definitely for me. For him maybe. He cares for me, I can say that... I really, really like him. Love... in that way, I have no idea.

Just don't nag. He'll come around...

I was thinking this morning about the Libra man in my life and in particular about a conversation. It was very much in the beginning, couple of months into it.

I was fishing to know more of his feelings for me and I said "Don't you need me?" (must have watched too much crap on television, or something to nag like that)...His response: "I don't need you; I just love you". I thought about that response for a long time. It had blown me away...

And I think it summs up a Libra in a way. We are not needy but we can love deeply...

Thank you kennyg our needs seem to only really concern them once we have him in the persuit unless we bring it to their attention, they seem clueless.

Libra, never a nag... I don't want anyone needy again eiher, that would be more like a cancer or pisces man. Can't handle that.

Nagging aggrevates me, so I wouldn't do it to anyone else. Also being with a Libra for 8 years I learned it is a no-no. Won't get anything out of them if you nag...

Also, as you can see in my posts. Never any pressure, hence giving him a couple weeks, however I will not just wait around. Way too cute for that... LOL!!!

***Thank you kennyg our needs seem to only really concern them once we have him in the persuit unless we bring it to their attention, they seem clueless.***

Thank you kennyg, our needs seem to only really concern them once we get them. During the persuit unless we bring it to their attentin, they seem clueless.

Whistle - QS YOu sound like you got it bad for this Libra friend. If he is damaged, as you say, do you think all this will just confuse him more or were you FWB before.

I think I got it bad for this Libra friend of mine but am trying to keep cotrol, I made the mistake with an Aries, tried to get him to give some kind of commitment after several months, that was a mistake, too pushy. Not that you are, since I do not know your situation.

Would really like to know what to expect with this Libra.

YOu are gutsy. I would have driven around the house for an hour only to drive back home. LOL

I do agree with libra that sometimes emails can be miscontrued. Funny how they do that. I prefer also to talk face to face, then you can see their facial expressesions, body language as well.

LOL@driving around for an hour then drive back home!!! that would be me too...it sure was a gutsy move and he'd be smiling 🙂

Benice, my story is way too long... So in short. My friend and I met while he was going through changes with his ex break up and make up... We started as friends, he did persue me in the beginning, calling several times a day, we would hang out a lot. At the time I didn't want any type of relationship, hince just getting out of a marriage with a Libra after beening together 8 years.. So eventually because of our animalistic attraction we became FWB. He expressed he was getting emotional about us and I sort of shut him down as it was way too early and I wasn't looking for that. He broke up and made up with the same sag ex about 5 times since I have known him and he would give me all the details, like looking for advice, although we were intimate during their break ups, I wasn't emotionally caught up at the time so it was cool. I just had a change of feelings for him about a month ago, just expressed that to him a couple weeks ago, so this is strange and hard a little different from everyone elses situation on here. Y'know. I have known him 7 months now...

YAY!

I found it. LOL!

I agree. That was crazy brave of you. I could never do something like that. I don't think I could handle the rejection if he didn't want me there.

-------

Benice

If you want/need commitment from someone then pursuing it is never a mistake. It is looking after your needs first. It doesn't guarantee that the person will give you the commitment you want/need BUT if they don't, you learn something valuable. They aren't compatible with you because what they want and what you want are different.

Know what I mean?