I know. that's why it is obessesion =.=
How do you know if you have true feelings for someone or it's just obsession? (Page 2)
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Posted by rabidtalkerYou think so? Or maybe it is because I am just crazy/out of my mind? 😕Posted by whatisthisallaboutPretty sure if there are several posts made and by alts about a person it is a sign of true feelings.
I am confused. Please help 😕
click to expand
Posted by Infinite8Posted by whatisthisallaboutIf you are obsessed, you truly care more about your needs much much more than those of the other. Obsession is being out of control, the energy controls YOU. You are not in control of it. Like an addict. Therefore, others become secondary.Posted by Infinite8I think I am more obssessed in this case, even though I do care about the needs of the other person.
When it's an obsession, I have a fixed goal and can't get it out of my mind/being.
When I have true feelings, I care for the wellbeing & needs of the other person as much as I care for mine. It's not as selfish. It feels healthier too.
Do you have any tips for reducing obsession?
What helped me was to clearly go through an obsession and remember the results. I didn't like what resulted of my obsession... and I wanted different outcome out of what my behavior created. Therefore, I changed my behavior... and the best way to do that is to put yourself in the other persons place.
I didn't treat him the way I wished to be treated. I like to be treated with respect, I like to be heard, I like feeling like the person TRUSTS me, I don't like to be questioned as if I were in an interrogation room.
I became the person that I would like for myself. And as soon as I did that, my magnet became a million times more powerful.
click to expand
+1
similiar experience, was gagga gogoo for a guy and it took coming out the other side to see my behavoir wasn't healthy.
Posted by EllygantI agree his response was very cold.Posted by whatisthisallaboutBrrrrrr. That seems very cold to read. Do you realize that? Is it hard to see because of how obsessed you feel?Posted by piscesmoon2I met him last March actually so it's been about a year now.Posted by whatisthisallaboutThis would be a red flag to me... may mean the biological clock is ticking or maybe just because you are ready for something does not mean they are... the idea of a relationship may tempt someone to also play you. Exposed your cards to fast... there is no reason you should not be able to get to know each other better.Posted by d0s3rI just don't like things to be in between. It drives me nuts.Posted by whatisthisallaboutGOD dxp is a waste of my damn timePosted by d0s3rI am LOL I just feel so crazy about him (=can't stop thinking about him and wanting him to be mine) but I know I don't know him enough to be in love with him... and I feel our interactions can be cute and friendly, but they remain at the superficial level. I dont really know him. =.=Posted by whatisthisallabouti hope this isn't about the pisces/cap venus?
but it is not right/unhealthy if I am not in love with the person but just want to own this person, right?
you don't deserve the man's love
fuck scorpios
go get a pet if you wanna own
love isn't a test of power
there's bdsm for that
I told him I want to get to know him better but I don't get a clear answer.
Piscesmoon
When we were talking, he only texted me once a week, or if when he wanted to hang out.
Thus, I still feel I barely know him after a year.
I told him I want us to talk on a regular basis recently, but he just told me thanks for sharing.
I have to admit that I have become very impatient.
That's how I break my obsession. Find ways in which the person isn't an object of worship but just like everyone else. It sounds weird, but you need to humanize them, go looking for their bad qualities. One of the few times Scorpio overanalysis comes in handy. Once they become just as normal as everyone else they won't occupy so much of your mind.
Obsession is often when you love the idea or the way they make you feel more than the person.click to expand
I also suspect that I only love the idea of him not the real him.
I told him I wanted to get to know him better and talk on a regular basis because I didn't think I could actual know someone if the only time he texted me first was to schedule a date. He's always acting like a gentleman when we hung out (e.g. carrying my stuff/backpack for me, cooking for me, wine and dine me, etc.) but I felt he could be doing that with any girls, it didn't have to be me.
I think I became very obessed and impatient because I want to know what is behind this cold gentleman image? Is there a warm heart? Or is there nothing behind?
Posted by SassyKiwiWhat does this whole thing mean? 😕Posted by Ellygant
Brrrrrr. That seems very cold to read. Do you realize that? Is it hard to see because of how obsessed you feel?
That's how I break my obsession. Find ways in which the person isn't an object of worship but just like everyone else. It sounds weird, but you need to humanize them, go looking for their bad qualities. One of the few times Scorpio overanalysis comes in handy. Once they become just as normal as everyone else they won't occupy so much of your mind.
Obsession is often when you love the idea or the way they make you feel more than the person.
Pshhh nah uh
Like every time they say they need to nap I want to be like "I volunteer to be ur body pillow" all for their comfort and enhanced napping experience duh and then when we hug I don't want to let them go ever bc THEY will get cold which nobody would want u know its not a good feeling I am just looking out
click to expand
Posted by MontgomeryI am struggling because I do feel insane LOL
Isn't love temporary insanity?
Soo... who's to say? 😛
Posted by justagirlI am in the midst of it and I already feel/think that I am being unhealthy... ahhh. I hate my obsessive thoughts.... =.=Posted by Infinite8Posted by whatisthisallaboutIf you are obsessed, you truly care more about your needs much much more than those of the other. Obsession is being out of control, the energy controls YOU. You are not in control of it. Like an addict. Therefore, others become secondary.Posted by Infinite8I think I am more obssessed in this case, even though I do care about the needs of the other person.
When it's an obsession, I have a fixed goal and can't get it out of my mind/being.
When I have true feelings, I care for the wellbeing & needs of the other person as much as I care for mine. It's not as selfish. It feels healthier too.
Do you have any tips for reducing obsession?
What helped me was to clearly go through an obsession and remember the results. I didn't like what resulted of my obsession... and I wanted different outcome out of what my behavior created. Therefore, I changed my behavior... and the best way to do that is to put yourself in the other persons place.
I didn't treat him the way I wished to be treated. I like to be treated with respect, I like to be heard, I like feeling like the person TRUSTS me, I don't like to be questioned as if I were in an interrogation room.
I became the person that I would like for myself. And as soon as I did that, my magnet became a million times more powerful.
+1
similiar experience, was gagga gogoo for a guy and it took coming out the other side to see my behavoir wasn't healthy.click to expand
Posted by yupvirgooWhat does moon in the 8th house do? What are the traits?
I have moon in the 8th house so it kinda goes hand-in-hand for me.
Posted by whatisthisallaboutPosted by SassyKiwiWhat does this whole thing mean? 😕Posted by Ellygant
Brrrrrr. That seems very cold to read. Do you realize that? Is it hard to see because of how obsessed you feel?
That's how I break my obsession. Find ways in which the person isn't an object of worship but just like everyone else. It sounds weird, but you need to humanize them, go looking for their bad qualities. One of the few times Scorpio overanalysis comes in handy. Once they become just as normal as everyone else they won't occupy so much of your mind.
Obsession is often when you love the idea or the way they make you feel more than the person.
Pshhh nah uh
Like every time they say they need to nap I want to be like "I volunteer to be ur body pillow" all for their comfort and enhanced napping experience duh and then when we hug I don't want to let them go ever bc THEY will get cold which nobody would want u know its not a good feeling I am just looking out
click to expand
Me trying to justify my obsession...
Posted by SassyKiwiI see lol That is very cute, btw 😄Posted by whatisthisallaboutPosted by SassyKiwiWhat does this whole thing mean? 😕Posted by Ellygant
Brrrrrr. That seems very cold to read. Do you realize that? Is it hard to see because of how obsessed you feel?
That's how I break my obsession. Find ways in which the person isn't an object of worship but just like everyone else. It sounds weird, but you need to humanize them, go looking for their bad qualities. One of the few times Scorpio overanalysis comes in handy. Once they become just as normal as everyone else they won't occupy so much of your mind.
Obsession is often when you love the idea or the way they make you feel more than the person.
Pshhh nah uh
Like every time they say they need to nap I want to be like "I volunteer to be ur body pillow" all for their comfort and enhanced napping experience duh and then when we hug I don't want to let them go ever bc THEY will get cold which nobody would want u know its not a good feeling I am just looking out
Me trying to justify my obsession...
click to expand
Posted by whatisthisallaboutNo an obsession is .....Posted by WonderWoman14I know. that's why it is obessesion =.=Posted by whatisthisallaboutYou don't have a right to own anybody.
but it is not right/unhealthy if I am not in love with the person but just want to own this person, right?click to expand
a state in which someone thinks about someone or something constantly or frequently especially in a way that is not normal
Wanting to own somebody is a sign of control and manipulation.
Posted by whatisthisallaboutPosted by SassyKiwiI see lol That is very cute, btw 😄Posted by whatisthisallaboutPosted by SassyKiwiWhat does this whole thing mean? 😕Posted by Ellygant
Brrrrrr. That seems very cold to read. Do you realize that? Is it hard to see because of how obsessed you feel?
That's how I break my obsession. Find ways in which the person isn't an object of worship but just like everyone else. It sounds weird, but you need to humanize them, go looking for their bad qualities. One of the few times Scorpio overanalysis comes in handy. Once they become just as normal as everyone else they won't occupy so much of your mind.
Obsession is often when you love the idea or the way they make you feel more than the person.
Pshhh nah uh
Like every time they say they need to nap I want to be like "I volunteer to be ur body pillow" all for their comfort and enhanced napping experience duh and then when we hug I don't want to let them go ever bc THEY will get cold which nobody would want u know its not a good feeling I am just looking out
Me trying to justify my obsession...
click to expand
I know I am very cute ? it's his loss
Posted by WonderWoman14They go hand in hand for me =.= I am obsessed with the idea of making him mine. It is an obesessive thought that keeps popping in my head, and meanwhile I can see that it is a sign of control/possessiveness.Posted by whatisthisallaboutNo an obsession is .....Posted by WonderWoman14I know. that's why it is obessesion =.=Posted by whatisthisallaboutYou don't have a right to own anybody.
but it is not right/unhealthy if I am not in love with the person but just want to own this person, right?
a state in which someone thinks about someone or something constantly or frequently especially in a way that is not normal
Wanting to own somebody is a sign of control and manipulation.
click to expand
Posted by yupvirgooI see. I think it potentially makes things harder for you or for him, unless you are with a girl who's super determined and is in it for a long fight... I am unhappy with him because I feel I don't know what's on his mind. I don't know any of his core values. I think he does remind me of a Virgo guy I liked in the past. They are perfect gentleman and they are very good at planning prefect dates, but they don't reveal themselves. I just need the emotional closeness to be happy with anyone....Posted by whatisthisallaboutHmm.. we need to be deeply emotionally invested to be able to allow ourselves to be intimate with someone.Posted by yupvirgooWhat does moon in the 8th house do? What are the traits?
I have moon in the 8th house so it kinda goes hand-in-hand for me.click to expand
Posted by EllygantThis is very true. I am scared to make a move now because I am not sure, like you said, if I will get bored once I "catch him". It happened once in the past with a Taurus guy. I was crazy about him and I called him every single day for months...that was how determined I was and I didn't care even if he might reject me. I just wanted to talk to him every day.... but after we became bf and gf, I lost interest in 6 months....
Oh yeah. You got bit by the mystery bug. Scorpio catnip. We like to chase psychological mysteries.
If you were to 'catch' him or have him to yourself you'd probably grow bored once you figured out what you wanted.
When you really want someone for them, you might still think of them a lot, but you always want it to be their choice to come to you. It's not about gratification or conquering. The energy is way different. Not so stressful. More like compassionate passion.
Yea, I guess it is a good indicator you threw in there, it shouldn't be so stressful. I think if I truly love someone, I should just be happy they are in my life.
Posted by yupvirgooThat's why I haven't had any success with Virgo guys. I think there were two Virgo guys I really liked in the past... I was probably acting too aloof and they too. I feel Virgo guys tend to fall for girls who are a little crazy and wear their heart on their sleeves :pPosted by whatisthisallaboutYeah we're pretty cautious when it comes to emotional investment. It might take awhile before we truly "reveal" ourselves.Posted by yupvirgooI see. I think it potentially makes things harder for you or for him, unless you are with a girl who's super determined and is in it for a long fight... I am unhappy with him because I feel I don't know what's on his mind. I don't know any of his core values. I think he does remind me of a Virgo guy I liked in the past. They are perfect gentleman and they are very good at planning prefect dates, but they don't reveal themselves. I just need the emotional closeness to be happy with anyone....Posted by whatisthisallaboutHmm.. we need to be deeply emotionally invested to be able to allow ourselves to be intimate with someone.Posted by yupvirgooWhat does moon in the 8th house do? What are the traits?
I have moon in the 8th house so it kinda goes hand-in-hand for me.click to expand
Posted by whatisthisallaboutJust a joke 😄Posted by rabidtalkerYou think so? Or maybe it is because I am just crazy/out of my mind? 😕Posted by whatisthisallaboutPretty sure if there are several posts made and by alts about a person it is a sign of true feelings.
I am confused. Please help 😕
click to expand
Posted by whatisthisallaboutPosted by WonderWoman14They go hand in hand for me =.= I am obsessed with the idea of making him mine. It is an obesessive thought that keeps popping in my head, and meanwhile I can see that it is a sign of control/possessiveness.Posted by whatisthisallaboutNo an obsession is .....Posted by WonderWoman14I know. that's why it is obessesion =.=Posted by whatisthisallaboutYou don't have a right to own anybody.
but it is not right/unhealthy if I am not in love with the person but just want to own this person, right?
a state in which someone thinks about someone or something constantly or frequently especially in a way that is not normal
Wanting to own somebody is a sign of control and manipulation.
click to expand
Then if that's in your nature you really should address it because you are going to have a problem in any future relationship with whoever it may be.
Posted by GemitatiWhy? Any story behind?Posted by xXxQueenliciaXxXI am Gemini and it is true feeling obsession with Scorpio! Ha?
If you're a Scorpio, it's obsession.click to expand
Posted by EllygantI think I will give myself at least a month to see how I feel.Posted by whatisthisallaboutI mean the chase is fun. Otherwise we wouldn't do it lol. But it mainly is about us and not really relating to the person. That's why falling in love slowly is very beneficial for Scorpios. It helps us grow and change in a positive way.Posted by EllygantThis is very true. I am scared to make a move now because I am not sure, like you said, if I will get bored once I "catch him". It happened once in the past with a Taurus guy. I was crazy about him and I called him every single day for months...that was how determined I was and I didn't care even if he might reject me. I just wanted to talk to him every day.... but after we became bf and gf, I lost interest in 6 months....
Oh yeah. You got bit by the mystery bug. Scorpio catnip. We like to chase psychological mysteries.
If you were to 'catch' him or have him to yourself you'd probably grow bored once you figured out what you wanted.
When you really want someone for them, you might still think of them a lot, but you always want it to be their choice to come to you. It's not about gratification or conquering. The energy is way different. Not so stressful. More like compassionate passion.
Yea, I guess it is a good indicator you threw in there, it shouldn't be so stressful. I think if I truly love someone, I should just be happy they are in my life.
And gives those of us that like a little drama enough to satiate us without actually causing problems lol.
Pumping the brakes is a good idea. 🙂 gives everyone room to breathe. And if you still think about them after having taken room, and they still think of you, then you know it's sincere and not just the thrill.
Been my experience anyways lolclick to expand
Thank you so much for the advice. I think it is very helpful. I feel calm at this moment. Hopefully I remain calm after I wake up tomorrow lol Sometimes my own emotions just drive me nuts.
Posted by WonderWoman14That's true. I think in my past relationships either I was obsessed with my SO or he's obsessed with me...Posted by whatisthisallaboutPosted by WonderWoman14They go hand in hand for me =.= I am obsessed with the idea of making him mine. It is an obesessive thought that keeps popping in my head, and meanwhile I can see that it is a sign of control/possessiveness.Posted by whatisthisallaboutNo an obsession is .....Posted by WonderWoman14I know. that's why it is obessesion =.=Posted by whatisthisallaboutYou don't have a right to own anybody.
but it is not right/unhealthy if I am not in love with the person but just want to own this person, right?
a state in which someone thinks about someone or something constantly or frequently especially in a way that is not normal
Wanting to own somebody is a sign of control and manipulation.
Then if that's in your nature you really should address it because you are going to have a problem in any future relationship with whoever it may be.
click to expand
Posted by whatisthisallaboutPosted by WonderWoman14That's true. I think in my past relationships either I was obsessed with my SO or he's obsessed with me...Posted by whatisthisallaboutPosted by WonderWoman14They go hand in hand for me =.= I am obsessed with the idea of making him mine. It is an obesessive thought that keeps popping in my head, and meanwhile I can see that it is a sign of control/possessiveness.Posted by whatisthisallaboutNo an obsession is .....Posted by WonderWoman14I know. that's why it is obessesion =.=Posted by whatisthisallaboutYou don't have a right to own anybody.
but it is not right/unhealthy if I am not in love with the person but just want to own this person, right?
a state in which someone thinks about someone or something constantly or frequently especially in a way that is not normal
Wanting to own somebody is a sign of control and manipulation.
Then if that's in your nature you really should address it because you are going to have a problem in any future relationship with whoever it may be.
click to expand
Either way it's unhealthy but at least you're aware of it and acknowledge it
Posted by Noni05good point 🙂
I care about his well being opposed to I only care about mine .
Posted by ImpulsvI know!!! I really really really hate the beginning stage of a relationship, or even just any interaction with a potential love interest.
All I know is that ugh I don't want to crush
I hate the beginning stages when u start to crush n you don't know anything if it's even reciprocated
U get exited you run into them n all is freindly between both. But I don't want to start to obsess on a crush as early in this stage
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