@whatisthisallabout
9 Years1,000+ Posts
How do you refer to the person you are dating but not yet serious?
How to refer to someone you're dating but not yet serious
You can refer to the person as your date, someone you're seeing, or a casual partner. It is best to be honest and clear about your level of commitment to avoid confusion. Introducing them to friends depends on your comfort level and the seriousness of the relationship.
I usually say the guy i'm seeing. Seeing means we're getting to know each other but could also be seeing other people...
Posted by whatisthisallabout
I mean, you have been seeing each other for about 2 months, going on dates, spending a couple days/week together, etc., but both of you are not ready to make it a bf/gf thing (e.g. you come from very different backgrounds/circles and you are still trying to figure out if it can work and you are not sure if the person could fit in your life/circle successfully).1. How would you refer to this person that you are dating? Your date? Your special friend?
2. Would you introduce the person to your friends (e.g. to get an impression on whether he will fit in/see how he acts like around your friends--I have dated guys who acted like assholes in front of my friends but were super sweet if just the two of us so...) or would you wait until you are sure you want a serious relationship with the person?
Thanks!
tricky question
i would say a good friend because there are only 3 stages when u know someone
of opposite sex
friend
girlfriend
nothing
?
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sounds good. thanks 🙂
Posted by MissM
I usually say the guy i'm seeing. Seeing means we're getting to know each other but could also be seeing other people...
This sounds good too, especially if it is a conversation with a 3rd party. Thanks.
Yes, we can still see other people since we are not sure how serious we wil get yet 🙂
Posted by tiziani
I'm all about being serious, 24/7, no days off from my love 😐
He wants to spend more time with me than I do with him because he has a lot more free time.
He does complain about me being busy all the time. I don't know. Maybe that's one of his concerns whether it can work.
Posted by whatisthisallabout
I mean, you have been seeing each other for about 2 months, going on dates, spending a couple days/week together, etc., but both of you are not ready to make it a bf/gf thing (e.g. you come from very different backgrounds/circles and you are still trying to figure out if it can work and you are not sure if the person could fit in your life/circle successfully).1. How would you refer to this person that you are dating? Your date? Your special friend?
2. Would you introduce the person to your friends (e.g. to get an impression on whether he will fit in/see how he acts like around your friends--I have dated guys who acted like assholes in front of my friends but were super sweet if just the two of us so...) or would you wait until you are sure you want a serious relationship with the person?
Thanks!
EASY! If I am asked by a guy out on a date, and we go to the club, I will introduce him to my friends as "This my date (so and so)"
If he and I are NOT boyfriend and girlfriend (this takes time), I will introduce him at the club to my friends as "This is my friend David"
My ex-bf, David (Saggy) and I made it official and at the club he introduced me as his "friend". When his friends went to the other side of the club, I grabbed my bf and told him, "Wait a minute! Are we official or aren't we? Are you my boyfriend or just a friend? I mean, if you're my 'friend' I can introduce you to MY friends as such". He did a quick 360 degree and told me, "No, I'm your boyfriend".
Well, a month later, we go to a Rodeo gala and he introduced me to a STRANGER as his "friend" I told him to the same thing at the table and embarrassed him by correcting him. I think that was another SIGN he and I would not be together; we're not! Cheers! 🍹
🤗 Cyber hugs!
Love,
Eva
Posted by tiziani
I'm all about being serious, 24/7, no days off from my love 😐He wants to spend more time with me than I do with him because he has a lot more free time.
He does complain about me being busy all the time. I don't know. Maybe that's one of his concerns whether it can work.
I find any kind of work with my hands or physical work leaves me with much less time to worry. But not mental work.
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Haha, interesting. I think as long as I focus on something at hand--no matter if it's physical or mental work, I don't have any mental capacity left to worry about anything.
Posted by Smidge
friend
Nice!
So if you introduce him as your friend if you go to an event together? Or would you just say, "this is XX (his name)." without mentioning anything else?
Just want to verify.
Posted by -Flo-
I feel people stress out about titles too much. It's best to let everything unfold naturally, see where it goes.. when you force for a change to happen it causes tension and you end up taking 10 steps back.Go with the flow but maybe that's just the aqua in me.
haha, thanks. I want to figure out an appropriate way to refer to him espeically when I introduce him to others if I decide to do so. I just don't know if he'd find it offensive if I tell people that he is "my friend." 😄
Posted by whatisthisallabout
I mean, you have been seeing each other for about 2 months, going on dates, spending a couple days/week together, etc., but both of you are not ready to make it a bf/gf thing (e.g. you come from very different backgrounds/circles and you are still trying to figure out if it can work and you are not sure if the person could fit in your life/circle successfully).1. How would you refer to this person that you are dating? Your date? Your special friend?
2. Would you introduce the person to your friends (e.g. to get an impression on whether he will fit in/see how he acts like around your friends--I have dated guys who acted like assholes in front of my friends but were super sweet if just the two of us so...) or would you wait until you are sure you want a serious relationship with the person?
Thanks!
EASY! If I am asked by a guy out on a date, and we go to the club, I will introduce him to my friends as "This my date (so and so)"
If he and I are NOT boyfriend and girlfriend (this takes time), I will introduce him at the club to my friends as "This is my friend David"
My ex-bf, David (Saggy) and I made it official and at the club he introduced me as his "friend". When his friends went to the other side of the club, I grabbed my bf and told him, "Wait a minute! Are we official or aren't we? Are you my boyfriend or just a friend? I mean, if you're my 'friend' I can introduce you to MY friends as such". He did a quick 360 degree and told me, "No, I'm your boyfriend".
Well, a month later, we go to a Rodeo gala and he introduced me to a STRANGER as his "friend" I told him to the same thing at the table and embarrassed him by correcting him. I think that was another SIGN he and I would not be together; we're not! Cheers! 🍹
🤗 Cyber hugs!
Love,
Eva
click to expand
Thank you so much for the suggested terms and sharing your story with the sag 🙂
Posted by whatisthisallabout
I mean, you have been seeing each other for about 2 months, going on dates, spending a couple days/week together, etc., but both of you are not ready to make it a bf/gf thing (e.g. you come from very different backgrounds/circles and you are still trying to figure out if it can work and you are not sure if the person could fit in your life/circle successfully).1. How would you refer to this person that you are dating? Your date? Your special friend?
2. Would you introduce the person to your friends (e.g. to get an impression on whether he will fit in/see how he acts like around your friends--I have dated guys who acted like assholes in front of my friends but were super sweet if just the two of us so...) or would you wait until you are sure you want a serious relationship with the person?
Thanks!
EASY! If I am asked by a guy out on a date, and we go to the club, I will introduce him to my friends as "This my date (so and so)"
If he and I are NOT boyfriend and girlfriend (this takes time), I will introduce him at the club to my friends as "This is my friend David"
My ex-bf, David (Saggy) and I made it official and at the club he introduced me as his "friend". When his friends went to the other side of the club, I grabbed my bf and told him, "Wait a minute! Are we official or aren't we? Are you my boyfriend or just a friend? I mean, if you're my 'friend' I can introduce you to MY friends as such". He did a quick 360 degree and told me, "No, I'm your boyfriend".
Well, a month later, we go to a Rodeo gala and he introduced me to a STRANGER as his "friend" I told him to the same thing at the table and embarrassed him by correcting him. I think that was another SIGN he and I would not be together; we're not! Cheers! 🍹
🤗 Cyber hugs!
Love,
Eva
Thank you so much for the suggested terms and sharing your story with the sag 🙂
click to expand
YW; true story; broke up w/him 3-4 days before my birthday on the 27th of Feb 2016; yippie!! almost a year!
🤗 cyber hugs!
Love,
Eva
Posted by -Flo-
I feel people stress out about titles too much. It's best to let everything unfold naturally, see where it goes.. when you force for a change to happen it causes tension and you end up taking 10 steps back.Go with the flow but maybe that's just the aqua in me.
haha, thanks. I want to figure out an appropriate way to refer to him espeically when I introduce him to others if I decide to do so. I just don't know if he'd find it offensive if I tell people that he is "my friend." 😄
You could just ask him and go from there.
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that's ture 😆
Posted by Smidge
friendNice!
So if you introduce him as your friend if you go to an event together? Or would you just say, "this is XX (his name)." without mentioning anything else?
Just want to verify.
i'd tell my friends that i was sleeping with him so most of them would already know who he is but at a social gathering i'd introduce him just by his name, if there was somebody there that i wasn't that close to and they asked who he is i'd just say "a friend".
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I guess I will just introduce him by name then 😆
My Husband
Lol
Jesus, guys....what about just saying their name...what's with the titles?
Posted by TerramineLightvoid
I never really understood this. You've probably had sex with them(cause who doesn't fuck after 2 months lol) but you're not BF and GF? lolwatI never understood dating outside of a relationship. I mean sure you gotta know each other but like, that's what friendship is for.
Personally I just don't swing that way.
I guess girls are more practical?
Apperance-wise, he's totally my type. We have great chemistry. However, he does not have a very stable job (he has a part-time minimum-wage job) and he is very impulsive and childish. I almost walked after a few time of him acting really immaure, but then he did romantic things to make it up, such as bringing me flowers and taking me to a good spot to watch the stars and the city lights.
He has been making progress in controlling his impulsivity, but I am still not convinced that he will make a good bf yet.
Posted by MyStarsShine
My HusbandLol
Jesus, guys....what about just saying their name...what's with the titles?
How if people ask what's our relationship? =.=
Posted by MyStarsShine
My HusbandLol
Jesus, guys....what about just saying their name...what's with the titles?
How if people ask what's our relationship? =.=
click to expand
You just say that he is the guy or woman you are dating?
Or he is my boyfriend, she is my girlfriend
Or if you want to shock them say *this is my lover*
😛
I usually say, "good friend" or "date" depending on how they feel.
Posted by Smidge
friendNice!
So if you introduce him as your friend if you go to an event together? Or would you just say, "this is XX (his name)." without mentioning anything else?
Just want to verify.
i'd tell my friends that i was sleeping with him so most of them would already know who he is but at a social gathering i'd introduce him just by his name, if there was somebody there that i wasn't that close to and they asked who he is i'd just say "a friend".
I guess I will just introduce him by name then 😆
yeah lol
i doubt anybody will ask more... " this is bob" " is he your boyfriend?"
well actually...unless you have a sag friend... or male leo friend.. cheeky fuckers!
click to expand
hahaha, yea, some of my friends are nosey/like to tease me. And yes, Sag. I have a sag female friend who always try to say embarrasing things like that whenever she sees me talking to a guy.
Posted by MyStarsShine
Or if you want to shock them say *this is my lover*😛
HAHAHAHA.
Posted by AdmiraI
If you're fucking you're fwb. If you're not fucking you're close friends that do some things reminiscent of being in a relationship. He's scared of something or you both are.
How if you do everything couples do including celebrating Valentine's day together, but you just are not sure if you want a relationship with this particular person?
Posted by earlorg16
I usually say, "good friend" or "date" depending on how they feel.
I guess I will go by "date". Thanks!
Posted by TerramineLightvoid
I never really understood this. You've probably had sex with them(cause who doesn't fuck after 2 months lol) but you're not BF and GF? lolwatI never understood dating outside of a relationship. I mean sure you gotta know each other but like, that's what friendship is for.
Personally I just don't swing that way.
I guess girls are more practical?
Apperance-wise, he's totally my type. We have great chemistry. However, he does not have a very stable job (he has a part-time minimum-wage job) and he is very impulsive and childish. I almost walked after a few time of him acting really immaure, but then he did romantic things to make it up, such as bringing me flowers and taking me to a good spot to watch the stars and the city lights.
He has been making progress in controlling his impulsivity, but I am still not convinced that he will make a good bf yet.
Love isn't practical. It is sheer unfettered chaos.
His impulsivity is one thing. But fact is that your concern for his career and money means you ain't gonna love him.
Your concern for his impulsivity is mainly relevant because impulsive people are lacking development in the part of their brain dealing with self control. Which means it usually isn't specific. They're usually just lacking self control in general. Which means he's prone to cheating in the wrong situations.
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So hypothetically if you have feelings for a girl but you are concerned that she may be a cheater since she's very impulsive and cannot contorl her emotions, what do you do? :p
Posted by leowww
The guy I'm seeing?Sure if I see myself dating him I'll introduce him to my friends... Otherwise nope.
I'm private, I'll keep him to myself until we're exclusive and dating officially.
Thanks!
I am still deciding how far this can go with him.
Posted by narayana
Fuck the title, my best friends gotta see them just in case if I've gone love-blind
Yea, I think my friends usually can spot red flags better than I do. They are more objective.
Posted by Smidge
friendNice!
So if you introduce him as your friend if you go to an event together? Or would you just say, "this is XX (his name)." without mentioning anything else?
Just want to verify.
i'd tell my friends that i was sleeping with him so most of them would already know who he is but at a social gathering i'd introduce him just by his name, if there was somebody there that i wasn't that close to and they asked who he is i'd just say "a friend".
I guess I will just introduce him by name then 😆
yeah lol
i doubt anybody will ask more... " this is bob" " is he your boyfriend?"
well actually...unless you have a sag friend... or male leo friend.. cheeky fuckers!
hahaha, yea, some of my friends are nosey/like to tease me. And yes, Sag. I have a sag female friend who always try to say embarrasing things like that whenever she sees me talking to a guy.
they're terrible for that! i could kill my sag friend sometimes the shit that comes outta her mouth.
i also have a leo guy friend who just LOVES to make people awkward.
maybe just don't invite any sags or leos 😉
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Haha. I will keep that in mind. Thanks!
Posted by AdmiraI
If you're fucking you're fwb. If you're not fucking you're close friends that do some things reminiscent of being in a relationship. He's scared of something or you both are.How if you do everything couples do including celebrating Valentine's day together, but you just are not sure if you want a relationship with this particular person?
Then you are FWB and somebody's gonna cry someday
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I thought FWB don't celebrate any holidays together? 😕
I mean, do FWB give you valentine's day presents, birthday presents, etc.?
Posted by AdmiraI
If you're fucking you're fwb. If you're not fucking you're close friends that do some things reminiscent of being in a relationship. He's scared of something or you both are.How if you do everything couples do including celebrating Valentine's day together, but you just are not sure if you want a relationship with this particular person?
He's not taking this shit seriously and there's something stopping him from having a relationship but he isn't telling you because he quite frankly doesn't know how you may react.
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This is the other way around, sir. I am not sure if I want to be serious with him because he is very immature and does not have a stable job.
Posted by AdmiraI
If you're fucking you're fwb. If you're not fucking you're close friends that do some things reminiscent of being in a relationship. He's scared of something or you both are.How if you do everything couples do including celebrating Valentine's day together, but you just are not sure if you want a relationship with this particular person?
He's not taking this shit seriously and there's something stopping him from having a relationship but he isn't telling you because he quite frankly doesn't know how you may react.
This is the other way around, sir. I am not sure if I want to be serious with him because he is very immature and does not have a stable job.
Well then if you don't like him then stop wasting your time with him and tell him what's up. Don't spare anything, give it to him straight. He might not like it for a while but he'll understand it was better that way.
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Well, I guess it is probably an easier fix than waiting for him to find a real job and grow up 😆
He is aware of his problem actaully. He told me that the previous girl didn't want to be committed to him because she wanted a bf that she'd feel proud to introduce to her friends.
Posted by AdmiraI
If you're fucking you're fwb. If you're not fucking you're close friends that do some things reminiscent of being in a relationship. He's scared of something or you both are.How if you do everything couples do including celebrating Valentine's day together, but you just are not sure if you want a relationship with this particular person?
Then you are FWB and somebody's gonna cry someday
I thought FWB don't celebrate any holidays together? 😕
I mean, do FWB give you valentine's day presents, birthday presents, etc.?
There are no global rules of what FWB do or don't... The only difference between a couple and FWB is the commitment/lack of it.
If you both want it, you get together officially. If one or none, it stays as it is or it's over.
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So do you introduce people as your FWB? 😄
Posted by -Flo-
I feel people stress out about titles too much. It's best to let everything unfold naturally, see where it goes.. when you force for a change to happen it causes tension and you end up taking 10 steps back.Go with the flow but maybe that's just the aqua in me.
haha, thanks. I want to figure out an appropriate way to refer to him espeically when I introduce him to others if I decide to do so. I just don't know if he'd find it offensive if I tell people that he is "my friend." 😄
Why is a title necessary? Just introduce him by his name.
I think it's a little strange to refer to him as a friend, and a little hurtful if the other person is feeling more.
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I guess referring to him by his name or "a date" is probably the best idea so far. I agree that it can be hurtful if the other person wants it to be more.
Hanging out and date, There is a fine line between the 2 of it. "Friends" or "DATE" I dont know how many times ive seen my friends in that type of situation where they would do fwb or still getting to know each other with no title. Then it switches from friends then later to something more and to fwb.
That's why i say not giving title put less pressure on both sides but at some point if you all been talking and getting to know each other after several months. Then I think it's time for a real discussion to follow.
If you don't feel then you should tell him, you guys should maybe talk, perhaps he Will improve on his job, perhaps he wont. If you see potential and he is willing to improve himself then date him, only if you feel it.
Posted by Mimi24
Hanging out and date, There is a fine line between the 2 of it. "Friends" or "DATE" I dont know how many times ive seen my friends in that type of situation where they would do fwb or still getting to know each other with no title. Then it switches from friends then later to something more and to fwb.That's why i say not giving title put less pressure on both sides but at some point if you all been talking and getting to know each other after several months. Then I think it's time for a real discussion to follow.
If you don't feel then you should tell him, you guys should maybe talk, perhaps he Will improve on his job, perhaps he wont. If you see potential and he is willing to improve himself then date him, only if you feel it.
Thanks for the comment. I think I will just keep my options open.
He just did his taxes and he only made $ 13,000 last year =.=
He's in his late 20s and has been out of college for 2 years now. He told me if he can't find a better job by the end of the year he will just move to Asia to teah English =.=
Posted by -Flo-
I feel people stress out about titles too much. It's best to let everything unfold naturally, see where it goes.. when you force for a change to happen it causes tension and you end up taking 10 steps back.Go with the flow but maybe that's just the aqua in me.
haha, thanks. I want to figure out an appropriate way to refer to him espeically when I introduce him to others if I decide to do so. I just don't know if he'd find it offensive if I tell people that he is "my friend." 😄
Why is a title necessary? Just introduce him by his name.
I think it's a little strange to refer to him as a friend, and a little hurtful if the other person is feeling more.
I know it took my current boyfriend 4 months to introduce me as his girlfriend. For 2 months, it was "friend" & I hated that because it was more than friends. Then one day, he introduced me as his friend to a girl he knew, and she takes a double take at us and said " don't you mean your girlfriend??" It was pretty funny. That's the last time he introduced me as his friend. Next time was just my name, and next time it was girlfriend.
I really didn't want to make a big deal of it, because it's just a sign where he really was no matter what he said in private. You know relationships evolve that way & it's better to let them instead of forcing titles.
I would have preferred just introducing me by my name though. Since you are asking the question 🙂
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Introducing people by name it is. Thanks.
Posted by AdmiraI
If you're fucking you're fwb. If you're not fucking you're close friends that do some things reminiscent of being in a relationship. He's scared of something or you both are.How if you do everything couples do including celebrating Valentine's day together, but you just are not sure if you want a relationship with this particular person?
Then you are FWB and somebody's gonna cry someday
I thought FWB don't celebrate any holidays together? 😕
I mean, do FWB give you valentine's day presents, birthday presents, etc.?
There are no global rules of what FWB do or don't... The only difference between a couple and FWB is the commitment/lack of it.
If you both want it, you get together officially. If one or none, it stays as it is or it's over.
So do you introduce people as your FWB? 😄
No, I just say their name, but others can probably sense wassup
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I see LOL
I guess it is better to just introduce people by name.
Posted by xXxQueenliciaXxX
We're dating.That's it.
Thanks 🙂
Posted by whatisthisallabout
I mean, you have been seeing each other for about 2 months, going on dates, spending a couple days/week together, etc., but both of you are not ready to make it a bf/gf thing (e.g. you come from very different backgrounds/circles and you are still trying to figure out if it can work and you are not sure if the person could fit in your life/circle successfully).1. How would you refer to this person that you are dating? Your date? Your special friend?
2. Would you introduce the person to your friends (e.g. to get an impression on whether he will fit in/see how he acts like around your friends--I have dated guys who acted like assholes in front of my friends but were super sweet if just the two of us so...) or would you wait until you are sure you want a serious relationship with the person?
Thanks!
To me... this is way over the top "over thinking it" and I'm a Virgo. I over think things all the time. However, when introducing the guy I'm with, I just simply introduce them by name. Why complicate things?
Posted by whatisthisallabout
I mean, you have been seeing each other for about 2 months, going on dates, spending a couple days/week together, etc., but both of you are not ready to make it a bf/gf thing (e.g. you come from very different backgrounds/circles and you are still trying to figure out if it can work and you are not sure if the person could fit in your life/circle successfully).1. How would you refer to this person that you are dating? Your date? Your special friend?
2. Would you introduce the person to your friends (e.g. to get an impression on whether he will fit in/see how he acts like around your friends--I have dated guys who acted like assholes in front of my friends but were super sweet if just the two of us so...) or would you wait until you are sure you want a serious relationship with the person?
Thanks!
To me... this is way over the top "over thinking it" and I'm a Virgo. I over think things all the time. However, when introducing the guy I'm with, I just simply introduce them by name. Why complicate things?
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Haha yea. I guess it's the easiest to just introduce people by name.
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I mean, you have been seeing each other for about 2 months, going on dates, spending a couple days/week together, etc., but both of you are not ready to make it a bf/gf thing (e.g. you come from very different backgrounds/circles and you are still trying to figure out if it can work and you are not sure if the person could fit in your life/circle successfully).
1. How would you refer to this person that you are dating? Your date? Your special friend?
2. Would you introduce the person to your friends (e.g. to get an impression on whether he will fit in/see how he acts like around your friends--I have dated guys who acted like assholes in front of my friends but were super sweet if just the two of us so...) or would you wait until you are sure you want a serious relationship with the person?
Thanks!