Why do some people love to disagree?

I notice this pattern with my boyfriend where he often takes an opinion opposing my own opinion when it comes to small things.

If I cave and agree with his opinion, he ends up switching his opinion so we aren’t in agreeance once again.

I asked him why he does this; he told me it’s because he likes to see things from all angles. But that’s not the vibe I get so idk.

Do you know someone who is like that? Why do they do it?

Posted by tiziani

To feel independent of the relationship.

Would you say it’s a personal problem if someone doesn’t feel independent of the relationship? Because I personally feel independent. Plus, it often feels like he’s mansplaining to me when he’s asserting his opinion. What’s up with that?

Posted by Fanta

Because Gemini.

In my response to tiz I mentioned mansplaining. But to come to think of it, my gemini mom also has a habit of explaining things in a condescending tone too 🤔🤔

Posted by Antiphates

Because agreeing rarely helps to make things better.

What if the topic isn’t something we can change?

Posted by 7thHouse

Maybe he's not opposing. He's just giving an alternative to what you've already thought about. I have so many gems in my life that I'm pretty much used to it. And it's good because they give me a different perspective all the time before I make a final decision. At least all options were explored and thought out well you know.

Very interesting last sentence you gave because my bf definitely explores ALL options. But he has a tendency to focus on the negative outcomes of a situation and overly stress about them even if the chances of a negative outcome are smaller than the chances of a positive one. I always thought it was his cancer moon. Interesting info!

Posted by Scheherazade

You argued your point so well he changed his mind. 😂

Awkward moment when he argues his point so well that he changes my mind and vice versa

Posted by ElectronCowboy

Posted by Whorpio

Posted by Antiphates

Because agreeing rarely helps to make things better.

What if the topic isn’t something we can change?

Be more specific, what topic?

click to expand

For example, analyzing a friends spending habits (said friend is super cheap even though he makes a lot of money and already has $ 100k in his savings account, but wants all his friends to go in on a Netflix subscription together so he doesn’t have to pay as much 🤦🏻‍♀️)

It's not disagreeing if you know everything.

Posted by ElectronCowboy

And what's your position on this matter?

Mine is real simple tell the miser to cram it in his ass.

Misers are always miserable people. 😔

I was saying our friend has reached a new level of cheapness, but he was saying it’s smart if everyone else can afford it. Then I agreed it would be smart since some of the friends don’t make as much money, and that’s when he said our cheap friend is being unnecessarily cheap and he should just pay for it on his own. I was like

Posted by _Dazed

It's not disagreeing if you know everything.

it's a way to keep the interaction going, to maintain a dynamic

I do this a lot in relationships just to poke them. Nothing really serious even though it can lead to real arguments xD

Its most fun on fire and water signs

Posted by Scheherazade

Posted by AfternoonDelights22

I do this a lot in relationships just to poke them. Nothing really serious even though it can lead to real arguments xD

Its most fun on fire and water signs

Exactly. I hate real fighting. But I like messing around about it.

click to expand

I can be very shallow when dating lol but I do need mental stimulation and I think this is a good way to go about it. Even if I don't necessarily agree with the side I am taking in the discussion.

Posted by AfternoonDelights22

I do this a lot in relationships just to poke them. Nothing really serious even though it can lead to real arguments xD

Its most fun on fire and water signs

Posted by MrsElleCappysnatch

Me - Do you like lasagna? I'm thinking about trying keto lasagna.

Capricorn - No, I hate lasagna

Me - *scraps the lasagna idea*

*Three days later*

Capricorn - When are you making that lasagna you mentioned?

wtf—!!! smh

Me - Do you like the house salad at Olive Garden? I'm ordering out for tonight and looking for something keto friendly for you.

Capricorn - No, thanks. I don't eat house salads.

*two hours later*

Capricorn - Are you ordering that salad?

Me - You said you didnt want it. *looks over the list of restaurants because now I've changed my mind* How about salmon at Carrabas?

Capricorn - Sure.

Me - Do you want the Italian, Caesar or House salad?

Capricorn - The House salad.

Me - Gawd you are a dick sometimes.

😂🤣😂🤣

I've learned that every idea I come up with will always be met with a no and I just need to do it anyways.

Now that sounds exhausting but at least you’ve found a flow (doing it anyways).

Some couples like to do this opposing side arguments as some type of mental 4play

Posted by Whorpio

Posted by AfternoonDelights22

I do this a lot in relationships just to poke them. Nothing really serious even though it can lead to real arguments xD

Its most fun on fire and water signs

https://i.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/030/359/cover4.jpg<div class="bqfade">click to expand

Once the hands go on the hips like that you conceded the discussions lol

Posted by Scheherazade

Posted by AfternoonDelights22

Posted by Scheherazade

Posted by AfternoonDelights22

I do this a lot in relationships just to poke them. Nothing really serious even though it can lead to real arguments xD

Its most fun on fire and water signs

Exactly. I hate real fighting. But I like messing around about it.

I can be very shallow when dating lol but I do need mental stimulation and I think this is a good way to go about it. Even if I don't necessarily agree with the side I am taking in the discussion.

It’s nice to find someone that doesn’t take it personally and will just chatter away forever about pointless meaningless debates 😂

click to expand

i agree

Posted by HearttofTopazz

The fun thing about Air signs (Gem in particular) is you can switch it up and come to them with almost anything from a different angle. Switch things up. Since you know it will already go there.. Have fun with it. Don’t just agree with them for the sake of it. That’s not fun for anyone. Don’t be rude either tho lol

It’s about finding a balance and having fun. They are great about meeting you halfway. A great relationship isn’t made from agreeing on everything. Foreplay for the mind is necessary.

I usually maintain my view. It’s once in a blue moon where I agree with his side.

Posted by HearttofTopazz

Posted by WhorpioI usually maintain my view. It’s once in a blue moon where I agree with his side.

I’m not trying to down you. Just typing freely about things that have worked for me.

click to expand

I know! I’m just saying I usually do stand my ground but he doesn’t meet me halfway when I do. Not sure about the mental foreplay part though, I mean he doesn’t get a boner from these debates if that’s what you mean. I don’t think I understand much about intellectual foreplay.

My Libra does this

I have to use reverse psychology to get my way or get him to agree with me 😅

Nah. His ass is just argumentative af 🙄 Maybe he should consider a debate team and leave you out of that shit.

Posted by GODZ

Like I'm proposing something he told me "no"',

I developed my point and then he's alright.

But I have friend who instant say yes to the proposition or propose something and debate about it.

That person just say no and have nothing else to propose and he's betting on the fact that you are gonna develop your argue.

Waste of fcking time

yep pretty much

i think most earth signs see it as exhausting and a waste of time

😂 what the fuck is "mansplaining"?

Posted by Fanta

Posted by magma5

Posted by Fanta

Because Gemini.

Oh.

Was kind of kidding, but not kind of not. From the looks of the thread, air signs can argue with people without getting pissed forever.

click to expand

Agree

They call them contrarians!

Many people want to come across as sophisticated, or more intelligent than you, and the way they do that is to take the opposite opinion, denigrate yours, and elevate theirs. There is such a thing as the concept of facts!

Posted by Fanta

Posted by ELIGAB

Posted by Fanta

Posted by magma5

Posted by Fanta

Because Gemini.

Oh.

Was kind of kidding, but not kind of not. From the looks of the thread, air signs can argue with people without getting pissed forever.

Agree

I agree with your agreement. 🙂

click to expand

Lol

Love is not the right word, to some extent even the opposite could be true. I mean, personally, I value reason/logic or the empirical truth - and i freaking hate it - when someone says something and expects you to eat their shit - just because they said it (even if it doesn't make sense - or if clearly - it's not the truth). This seems to work only for ass-kissers (don't seem to care much if it's the truth or not - or if it makes any sense - it's all about "who says it"), they can sure eat a lot of shit - while aiming for some benefits. But i'm no ass-kisser (they make me wanna puke 🤢 🤮). So yeah, i'd rather disagree if you're on the wrong (as far as i can tell) And hey... if you can prove me wrong - i'm down with that as well (cause again - i value the truth more than pride / i even find that really dumb and waste of time..."to hold my ground and keep disagreeing - even if i'm clearly in the wrong - as proven by the available evidence"). Can't stand those people (who don't give a fuck if they're right or wrong - it's all about their pride and having the last word 🙄).

Aries Moon!!