MsAnn
@MsAnn
9 Years
Comments: 0 · Posts: 45 · Topics: 3
Opinions Please. See below.
He wants to have his cake and eat the shit too.. Basically what I read.
FFS- 18 years ? - at this point the issue is most likely moot since ya'll have been yo yo ing around each other all this time and that hasn't changed ... so I don't see it changing is what I'm trying to say
either end it or live with it - which has been the same question in your head all these years - right ? oh my ... what a waste of a lifetime is what I think ...
either end it or live with it - which has been the same question in your head all these years - right ? oh my ... what a waste of a lifetime is what I think ...
18 years (kids until now) we both are 32. I guess at some point, I thought he would be done with the non-commitment era of his life. I'm no saint either but it's in response to him doing him.
Posted by poison_ivyI agree. I thought it was futile to post the back and forth jargon after his last text. But I said the same thing to him, and what I surprise. He did not agree.
He wants to have his cake and eat the shit too.. Basically what I read.
Posted by RindarooI do actually mean 18 years. We met at 14, started a relationship at 18. We broke up after he did 2 tours. 1 in Afghanistan and 1 in Iraq....we remained close friends. We got back together for a short period of time but I caught him cheating, we broke up but still remained close. I was with during a very hard time in his life. And the cycle repeats itself. I'm a sucker "I need you in my life". I have no idea what to call us actually at this time. This conversation just happened this weekend. Pretty much I caught him cheating (no surprise) and he lied, until he just couldn't anymore. We were practically living together. I got so upset that I cut off all communication for about 8 months. When we did start back communicating, he came full force, I love you, I miss, you know all the stuff women love to hear. But left out that they were still together. So, when I found out (again) the above text messages occurred. And here I am. Oh, and yes we have sex and our chemistry is out of this world amazing. Well at least for me. I'm so confused because this girl is a Taurus. (No shade to Taurus women at all)
18 months or years? You don't seem old enough for years. He says he'll be with you til you say stop? But that isn't addressing if he wants something official if he split with her. Is this sex or FWB or what? I have so many questions lol.
Based on what I see, saying stop seems the best answer. Btw my ex husband of 17 years is an Aries & I'm a Sag. The chemistry can be omg hot! But when there is a disagreement, I must say Aries are pretty stubborn and when their mind is made up there is no changing it... so I wonder how that factors in here.
Posted by MsAnnReally 😢Posted by poison_ivyI agree. I thought it was futile to post the back and forth jargon after his last text. But I said the same thing to him, and what I surprise. He did not agree.
He wants to have his cake and eat the shit too.. Basically what I read.click to expand
Yea, I'd say cut him loose.. He's not mentally ready for anything serious.. & I think he holds onto what you 2 had because you let him.. I would tell him unless he wants it to just be you and him, & he cuts his losses with the "new chick" and prove himself to you, then you're not gonna deal with it. & walk away.. It's harder than it sounds... but ppl truly don't realize what they have/had until it's gone..
Posted by leowwwWe don't have kids together. What I was trying to say was, we have known each other since we were kids.Posted by MsAnnI know it's hard.. You've been together for a long time... especially difficult if you have kids.
18 years (kids until now) we both are 32. I guess at some point, I thought he would be done with the non-commitment era of his life. I'm no saint either but it's in response to him doing him.
....
18 years you've reached a plateau in your relationship with him several times.. Breaking / making up.
The fact alone that he entertains other women...
When is enough.. Enough?
You're 32 you're still young & you can find someone who will commit to you.
click to expand
Posted by RindarooNot sure why it says 27. I input my DOB, born 1984. Either way, we both are 32 now.Posted by PlagueI did read! But the profile said 27 years old & that calculates to 9 years old. Unless that's not correct.Posted by Rindarooyears, read, just read.
18 months or years? You don't seem old enough for years. He says he'll be with you til you say stop? But that isn't addressing if he wants something official if he split with her. Is this sex or FWB or what? I have so many questions lol.
Based on what I see, saying stop seems the best answer. Btw my ex husband of 17 years is an Aries & I'm a Sag. The chemistry can be omg hot! But when there is a disagreement, I must say Aries are pretty stubborn and when their mind is made up there is no changing it... so I wonder how that factors in here.
click to expand
Posted by DwellingOnMoveLOL...controversy. Being back with me soon would imply he left. Nope, he never did. He just tried to get crafty at hiding what he was doing in plain sight..smh
how do you know it's not yet another controversy and he'll be back with you soon?
Posted by RindarooI guess that's what I'm scared of the most. He has been a part of my life for so long. Wrapping my head around a life that doesn't include him is scary but necessary at this point. Thank you.
Oh okay. I tell ya so hard. I was married 17 years, total relationship was 20 years. It was a rollercoaster the whole time. Different situation, but the thing is you never know if they come back to you. You just have to do what's good for you. Walking away after 20 years is heart wrenching. 32 is still young. Ask yourself what you want for your life ( your life not the one with him). Then go out & find it for yourself. It'll be okay.
Posted by RindarooYes. When he is 70 and his penis doesn't work anymore...LOL. Smh. Seriously no, I understand now, that he mean that it will be his way and whenever I get tired of his stuff, I can leave. Like he said, he will do this with me until I say, no more.Posted by MsAnnThanks for the history 🙂 That all is so hard. That's a lot of cheating. Cutting the cord is tough, but do you see it changing to be what you want?Posted by RindarooI do actually mean 18 years. We met at 14, started a relationship at 18. We broke up after he did 2 tours. 1 in Afghanistan and 1 in Iraq....we remained close friends. We got back together for a short period of time but I caught him cheating, we broke up but still remained close. I was with during a very hard time in his life. And the cycle repeats itself. I'm a sucker "I need you in my life". I have no idea what to call us actually at this time. This conversation just happened this weekend. Pretty much I caught him cheating (no surprise) and he lied, until he just couldn't anymore. We were practically living together. I got so upset that I cut off all communication for about 8 months. When we did start back communicating, he came full force, I love you, I miss, you know all the stuff women love to hear. But left out that they were still together. So, when I found out (again) the above text messages occurred. And here I am. Oh, and yes we have sex and our chemistry is out of this world amazing. Well at least for me. I'm so confused because this girl is a Taurus. (No shade to Taurus women at all)
18 months or years? You don't seem old enough for years. He says he'll be with you til you say stop? But that isn't addressing if he wants something official if he split with her. Is this sex or FWB or what? I have so many questions lol.
Based on what I see, saying stop seems the best answer. Btw my ex husband of 17 years is an Aries & I'm a Sag. The chemistry can be omg hot! But when there is a disagreement, I must say Aries are pretty stubborn and when their mind is made up there is no changing it... so I wonder how that factors in here.
click to expand
Posted by leowwwAll the reasons any other women stays...love, sex, feeling like I can't walk away. I'm posting here because I'm just tired. I know I need to leave. It helps a little to have people tell you, your not crazy and he is selfish. He has a way of making me feel bad, even when he says he understands.Posted by MsAnnMy mistake.Posted by leowwwWe don't have kids together. What I was trying to say was, we have known each other since we were kids.Posted by MsAnnI know it's hard.. You've been together for a long time... especially difficult if you have kids.
18 years (kids until now) we both are 32. I guess at some point, I thought he would be done with the non-commitment era of his life. I'm no saint either but it's in response to him doing him.
....
18 years you've reached a plateau in your relationship with him several times.. Breaking / making up.
The fact alone that he entertains other women...
When is enough.. Enough?
You're 32 you're still young & you can find someone who will commit to you.
What keeps you around?
Other than feelings.
After 18 years you know what he's about.click to expand
Lilith, Venus and Moon in Pisces. you are too good. why wasting yourself with a cheater?
ok, you can stay if your Scorp Mars is so happy with that. but what if you need/desire a more solid relationship?
for me his story is written and read and over.
ok, you can stay if your Scorp Mars is so happy with that. but what if you need/desire a more solid relationship?
for me his story is written and read and over.
Posted by DwellingOnMoveScorp Mars is not happy because I can't get what my Aries sun desires so much and that is to be #1. Also, it burns my soul for me to be the knowing party of this situation while she probably is in happy bliss. I know this is not about her at all. It is about me and him, which is why I have never included her. I know I need to leave. I was happier during those 8 months apart because I didn't have to worry so much and the person I was with truly appreciated me and I didn't feel used or taken advantage of.
Lilith, Venus and Moon in Pisces. you are too good. why wasting yourself with a cheater?
ok, you can stay if your Scorp Mars is so happy with that. but what if you need/desire a more solid relationship?
for me his story is written and read and over.
Posted by RindarooKids grow up quicker nowadays.Posted by PlagueI did read! But the profile said 27 years old & that calculates to 9 years old. Unless that's not correct.Posted by Rindarooyears, read, just read.
18 months or years? You don't seem old enough for years. He says he'll be with you til you say stop? But that isn't addressing if he wants something official if he split with her. Is this sex or FWB or what? I have so many questions lol.
Based on what I see, saying stop seems the best answer. Btw my ex husband of 17 years is an Aries & I'm a Sag. The chemistry can be omg hot! But when there is a disagreement, I must say Aries are pretty stubborn and when their mind is made up there is no changing it... so I wonder how that factors in here.
click to expand
Many people in general cheat unfortunately, but it is up to the one being cheated on to let go.
He's not going to, he has what he wants.
Let him go and I mean completely, and you'll be happier. I did and when I was single I was living a great life. Even now that I found someone, I'm still much happier.
Life is too short to be with someone who doesn't really care about you.
He's not going to, he has what he wants.
Let him go and I mean completely, and you'll be happier. I did and when I was single I was living a great life. Even now that I found someone, I'm still much happier.
Life is too short to be with someone who doesn't really care about you.
Don't feel bad.
I've seen a few Sagittarius dudes fall in a love Triangle with a Aries female and Taurus female.. the Aries female always gets hurt the most... but the Taurus leaves and the Sag males comes crawling back... just don't let Him back in.
I've seen a few Sagittarius dudes fall in a love Triangle with a Aries female and Taurus female.. the Aries female always gets hurt the most... but the Taurus leaves and the Sag males comes crawling back... just don't let Him back in.
"I'm gonna do this with you
until you say no more..."
Pretty clear.
Like @Caplove said-- he's absolved himself of
any guilt because you're aware of the situation
and you're still allowing it.
At least, that's how it appears.
It's okay to walk away from it.
Once you're out and you've gotten past the
"omg wtf did I do?"
stage (assuming there is one), you're going to
kick yourself for not doing it sooner.
32 is the perfect time for changes.
Its the beginning of some of the best times in
your life-- you still have all the goods and you
know *exactly* what to do with them.
🙂
until you say no more..."
Pretty clear.
Like @Caplove said-- he's absolved himself of
any guilt because you're aware of the situation
and you're still allowing it.
At least, that's how it appears.
It's okay to walk away from it.
Once you're out and you've gotten past the
"omg wtf did I do?"
stage (assuming there is one), you're going to
kick yourself for not doing it sooner.
32 is the perfect time for changes.
Its the beginning of some of the best times in
your life-- you still have all the goods and you
know *exactly* what to do with them.
🙂
Posted by CaploveThank you. As simple as it may sound, it never occurred to me that because I'm a willing participant time and time again, that in his mind, it absolves him from guilt. He always seemed ashamed and would apologize but now that the blinders are off so to speak, I know it wasn't that at all. Your absolutely right, he does take and take from me and acts as if it is okay. Whether it's financially, emotionally, physically. I'm always there. In the past when I have attempted to cut him off, going months without communication, it only made him try harder. Only to do the same thing over again. It's like he can sense when I am happy and moving on. But I have to take responsibility for allowing him back in. It helps me, to hear other opinions.Posted by MsAnnDon't feel bad and don't buy it when he tries to make you feel bad either. It's really subtle too isn't it? I think I have an idea. He's trying to be all noble and come off as an understanding good guy when he says he "understands," when he's anything but. Truth is he needs to be like that because deep down he knows he's wrong.Posted by leowwwAll the reasons any other women stays...love, sex, feeling like I can't walk away. I'm posting here because I'm just tired. I know I need to leave. It helps a little to have people tell you, your not crazy and he is selfish. He has a way of making me feel bad, even when he says he understands.Posted by MsAnnMy mistake.Posted by leowwwWe don't have kids together. What I was trying to say was, we have known each other since we were kids.Posted by MsAnnI know it's hard.. You've been together for a long time... especially difficult if you have kids.
18 years (kids until now) we both are 32. I guess at some point, I thought he would be done with the non-commitment era of his life. I'm no saint either but it's in response to him doing him.
....
18 years you've reached a plateau in your relationship with him several times.. Breaking / making up.
The fact alone that he entertains other women...
When is enough.. Enough?
You're 32 you're still young & you can find someone who will commit to you.
What keeps you around?
Other than feelings.
After 18 years you know what he's about.
Don't let his greed take advantage of that. He's operating on the dark side.
He will take and take and take from you, and in his mind it's all OKAY. There won't be any guilt. There won't be any because he knows that you already know he won't/doesn't want to be faithful to you. The fact that you go along with it absolves him from guilt (in his mind). He will keep it going forever if you allow it.
click to expand
Posted by MontgomeryThank you.
"I'm gonna do this with you
until you say no more..."
Pretty clear.
Like @Caplove said-- he's absolved himself of
any guilt because you're aware of the situation
and you're still allowing it.
At least, that's how it appears.
It's okay to walk away from it.
Once you're out and you've gotten past the
"omg wtf did I do?"
stage (assuming there is one), you're going to
kick yourself for not doing it sooner.
32 is the perfect time for changes.
Its the beginning of some of the best times in
your life-- you still have all the goods and you
know *exactly* what to do with them.
🙂
Youre not cuttin nothang loose.
Youve been in n out for 18 years.
If youre really wondering how do you win?
You dont. You accept the situation.
Youve been in n out for 18 years.
If youre really wondering how do you win?
You dont. You accept the situation.
Posted by MsAnnThis is as real as it gets with any man.
We've been dong this break-up to make up for about 18 years but I'm at my wits end. Opinions about the following text thread between the two of us is needed.
Him: Sun Sag Moon Cap Venus Cap
Me: Sun Aries Moon Pisces Venus Pisces
Him: What is the actual question? If it's why we doing, whatever we're doing then you probably answered that question within the same conversation of me saying I f'd up.
Me: Your f'up turned into or was a full blown relationship. If you truly didn't mean it, then you have had ample time to be with me. Since, your not with me and your with her, I want to know why you are still messing me (i.e. sleeping w/me, transferring money back and forth to bank accounts, traveling together etc), when you have someone else? I know exactly why I'm still messing with you.
Him: During that same conversation you mentioned me being able to love more than on person at a time and that seems to be it...it's two different relationships that probably mean slightly different things...I'm gonna do this with you until you say no more, her maybe not so much.
Me: I'm confused. Does that mean you always plan to be with her?
Him: Not necessarily.
THE END
He dont want to make a decision cause he doesnt have 2.
You enjoy the penis, vacays, etc. Youre not going anywhere and he knows it.
She enjoys the penis, vacays, etc. She aint going no where cause she happy.
His last answer is real shyt. He gonna rock with you 2 till he finda someone new to rock wit.
Posted by MsAnnYes that is a huge key / step of acknowledgement ... people who manipulate are not always in it alone - the flip side is that the other allows themselves to be manipulated - for whatever reasons ... you deserve much better !Posted by CaploveThank you. As simple as it may sound, it never occurred to me that because I'm a willing participant time and time again, that in his mind, it absolves him from guilt. He always seemed ashamed and would apologize but now that the blinders are off so to speak, I know it wasn't that at all. Your absolutely right, he does take and take from me and acts as if it is okay. Whether it's financially, emotionally, physically. I'm always there. In the past when I have attempted to cut him off, going months without communication, it only made him try harder. Only to do the same thing over again. It's like he can sense when I am happy and moving on. But I have to take responsibility for allowing him back in. It helps me, to hear other opinions.Posted by MsAnnDon't feel bad and don't buy it when he tries to make you feel bad either. It's really subtle too isn't it? I think I have an idea. He's trying to be all noble and come off as an understanding good guy when he says he "understands," when he's anything but. Truth is he needs to be like that because deep down he knows he's wrong.Posted by leowwwAll the reasons any other women stays...love, sex, feeling like I can't walk away. I'm posting here because I'm just tired. I know I need to leave. It helps a little to have people tell you, your not crazy and he is selfish. He has a way of making me feel bad, even when he says he understands.Posted by MsAnnMy mistake.Posted by leowwwWe don't have kids together. What I was trying to say was, we have known each other since we were kids.Posted by MsAnnI know it's hard.. You've been together for a long time... especially difficult if you have kids.
18 years (kids until now) we both are 32. I guess at some point, I thought he would be done with the non-commitment era of his life. I'm no saint either but it's in response to him doing him.
....
18 years you've reached a plateau in your relationship with him several times.. Breaking / making up.
The fact alone that he entertains other women...
When is enough.. Enough?
You're 32 you're still young & you can find someone who will commit to you.
What keeps you around?
Other than feelings.
After 18 years you know what he's about.
Don't let his greed take advantage of that. He's operating on the dark side.
He will take and take and take from you, and in his mind it's all OKAY. There won't be any guilt. There won't be any because he knows that you already know he won't/doesn't want to be faithful to you. The fact that you go along with it absolves him from guilt (in his mind). He will keep it going forever if you allow it.
click to expand
Posted by DMVI was wondering how long it was going to take before you read and commented. Straight up no chaser is what I can count on from you.Posted by MsAnnThis is as real as it gets with any man.
We've been dong this break-up to make up for about 18 years but I'm at my wits end. Opinions about the following text thread between the two of us is needed.
Him: Sun Sag Moon Cap Venus Cap
Me: Sun Aries Moon Pisces Venus Pisces
Him: What is the actual question? If it's why we doing, whatever we're doing then you probably answered that question within the same conversation of me saying I f'd up.
Me: Your f'up turned into or was a full blown relationship. If you truly didn't mean it, then you have had ample time to be with me. Since, your not with me and your with her, I want to know why you are still messing me (i.e. sleeping w/me, transferring money back and forth to bank accounts, traveling together etc), when you have someone else? I know exactly why I'm still messing with you.
Him: During that same conversation you mentioned me being able to love more than on person at a time and that seems to be it...it's two different relationships that probably mean slightly different things...I'm gonna do this with you until you say no more, her maybe not so much.
Me: I'm confused. Does that mean you always plan to be with her?
Him: Not necessarily.
THE END
He dont want to make a decision cause he doesnt have 2.
You enjoy the penis, vacays, etc. Youre not going anywhere and he knows it.
She enjoys the penis, vacays, etc. She aint going no where cause she happy.
His last answer is real shyt. He gonna rock with you 2 till he finda someone new to rock wit.click to expand
Posted by DMVI do not oppose anything you have said, other than I am happy. I am actually very unhappy with this.Posted by MsAnnThis is as real as it gets with any man.
We've been dong this break-up to make up for about 18 years but I'm at my wits end. Opinions about the following text thread between the two of us is needed.
Him: Sun Sag Moon Cap Venus Cap
Me: Sun Aries Moon Pisces Venus Pisces
Him: What is the actual question? If it's why we doing, whatever we're doing then you probably answered that question within the same conversation of me saying I f'd up.
Me: Your f'up turned into or was a full blown relationship. If you truly didn't mean it, then you have had ample time to be with me. Since, your not with me and your with her, I want to know why you are still messing me (i.e. sleeping w/me, transferring money back and forth to bank accounts, traveling together etc), when you have someone else? I know exactly why I'm still messing with you.
Him: During that same conversation you mentioned me being able to love more than on person at a time and that seems to be it...it's two different relationships that probably mean slightly different things...I'm gonna do this with you until you say no more, her maybe not so much.
Me: I'm confused. Does that mean you always plan to be with her?
Him: Not necessarily.
THE END
He dont want to make a decision cause he doesnt have 2.
You enjoy the penis, vacays, etc. Youre not going anywhere and he knows it.
She enjoys the penis, vacays, etc. She aint going no where cause she happy.
His last answer is real shyt. He gonna rock with you 2 till he finda someone new to rock wit.click to expand
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Him: Sun Sag Moon Cap Venus Cap
Me: Sun Aries Moon Pisces Venus Pisces
Him: What is the actual question? If it's why we doing, whatever we're doing then you probably answered that question within the same conversation of me saying I f'd up.
Me: Your f'up turned into or was a full blown relationship. If you truly didn't mean it, then you have had ample time to be with me. Since, your not with me and your with her, I want to know why you are still messing me (i.e. sleeping w/me, transferring money back and forth to bank accounts, traveling together etc), when you have someone else? I know exactly why I'm still messing with you.
Him: During that same conversation you mentioned me being able to love more than on person at a time and that seems to be it...it's two different relationships that probably mean slightly different things...I'm gonna do this with you until you say no more, her maybe not so much.
Me: I'm confused. Does that mean you always plan to be with her?
Him: Not necessarily.
THE END