Cancer boyfriend is ignoring me since disagreement

I had been dating this Cancer men for more than 4 months now. He called himself my boyfriend and he called me his girlfriend. We spent all weekends together and saw each other during the week.

Recently, I mentioned something during text messages that I had some concerns and I felt that we got disconnected. He wanted to continue the conversation via texting ( we were both at work at the time.) In short, I mentioned that I did not feel appreciated enough by him. I also said that I feel that he is a bit guarded. He asked me what else, so I answered that I needed more connection, communication , openness and touch. He was surprised because he thought we had these things. It has been a week since this text exchange. I texted and called him twice, but he keeps ignoring me. What do you guys think?

He needs space to think things through..they ate very sensitive to rejection and criticism...he's in his shell, and it may take time and coaxing to get him out..sorry it sucks!!

well, I'm sensitive too. How to coax him to get out? It sounds a bit selfish to run out. I feel rejected by this behavior to. To me it sounds like he is not taking me seriously.

Yea I'm a Pisces i feel the same, I find the best approach is to be direct but not attacking or anything, speak from the heart but don't be gushy or needy and they respond..start with a caring statement about what happened, to slowly get him to open up .express compassion and talk abt what it does to you later..it will deepen your bond I imagine.

Posted by boxcarmirnta
Yea I'm a Pisces i feel the same, I find the best approach is to be direct but not attacking or anything, speak from the heart but don't be gushy or needy and they respond..start with a caring statement about what happened, to slowly get him to open up .express compassion and talk abt what it does to you later..it will deepen your bond I imagine.

Well for now he is not talking to me. I see it a bit immature and unfortunately as a Taurus I can really upset when I am hurt. My patience is being tested lol

I hear ya! Your compassion deepens when you date a cancer, give him time I'm sure he'll come around..then you can talk about it.

To be with you I assume, unless you no longer want it.

I'm not sure what I want. I'm thinking that his interest me may not be really strong since he has been so silent for a week. In healthy relationships people communicate, work things out and feel free to express themselves.

He's rethinking how he comes off to you and is probably realizing that he isn't as close as he thinks and probably thinking of how to fix it. Times like these cancers like to think before they speak to avoid more damage. But sometimes those little bitches forget to come up for air. Just pop up at his house and hop on his dick. He'll get a good idea of what kind of closeness you want. Nah just talk to him more about it without nagging

Haha^ agreed.

How long is the time u give a cancerian. I have been dating mine for almost 4 yrs. He's not speaking to me as well cause I had a dream about him cheating

Maybe cancerian guys are different, I did date one once, but he was similar to myself. Anyway, the point is, if I cut someone off or start ignoring "ghosting" that mean's I'm done. But, it also depends on how close you were to begin with, if you were really close, I doubt you would have felt he was closed off, didn't cuddle or touch you enough etc. and after being together for four months + if he wasn't coming off as super loving, I doubt he was head over heels. If I were you, I would move on, stop trying to contact him no matter how hard it is, if he really really likes/loves you, he will notice quickly and come running back, if not, you're better off moving on asap.

Im a Vit if someone told me I am not affectionate or passionate there goes everything that I represent to someone when it comes to love. Fuck. To put everything in and communicate and be honest.. I would be feel back and withdraw too. Like what have I been doing this whole 4 years...nothing special obviously.

Do you live together?

So if he think everything was perfect. And you held that shit in for awhile. I'll be thinking why wait all this time. You're wasting my time. When I can be giving you ample amount of caring, sensuality, stability and trust..

Communication is key here..

Maybe you do some shit too and you're not prefect either..

Seems to me you're perfect and maybe you aren't. What are some type of things that are red flags on your part. Figure that out too. And compromise with eachother.

In some areas he was loving and caring , but he was also a bit guarded. I think that Cancers are a bit on the introvert side. I hoped that with time he would start opening up and share more of his wants, needs, inner thoughts and feelings with me.
We cuddled all the time, but he was not really touching me enough during the foreplay. I may be wrong, but I think that he got offended because in his eyes he was a perfect boyfriend. He was really surprised when I told him that he did not value me enough. He said that he was taking me out for dinners and buying me flowers and gifts all the time. He got me flowers three times —once for Valentines day. It was great I appreciated these gestures a lot. He got me a gift twice , once for a Valentines day and once for my birthday. In his eyes he was just a perfect boyfriend. He is probably clueless. I think that he should show me his affection in different ways, be more verbally expressive, gives me plenty of foreplay, be more concerned with my feelings etc.

Posted by aurora
people should stop texting about serious stuff.

Yup. This is what the OP did wrong.

.
What is a Vit? It was not 4 years , it was 4 months. We do not live together.
I'm not claiming that I'm perfect at all. What do you mean by saying do some butter?

IJust communications and honesty with each other and open up and give it time.. Have a long chat with him.. Venus in Taurus or any sentimental venuses must feel they are reciprocal if not can get hurt or sensitive..

Posted by cappygirl11
How long is the time u give a cancerian. I have been dating mine for almost 4 yrs. He's not speaking to me as well cause I had a dream about him cheating

Lol. What? I'm confused. Did you act off the dream IRL? He probably thinks your tripping and he's getting space to let his mind be sane again.

I agree cancers should never text or be texted. They're awful in this way.
But dudes feelings might be hurt now that you say that. I think that was a very good try at treating you right and being close. That's like telling him he's not good at loving you. He could see that as a rejection in a way. I think what you should've said was I love how you show your love but I want more of you.

Well he may be hurt, but in a healthy relationship people should be able to communicate freely. It is a sign of maturity. I tried before to hint things or say things in more delicate way but he did not get it. He has never told me that he loved me, so he was not good enough in loving me. Now when he does not even have the decency to tell me that it is over, so I doubt he had any feelings towards me at all.
He just thought that spending time with me and taking me out for dinners was enough. Women at least me —need more. Maybe he is not capable of being in a relationship in which people give each other support and care about each others feelings.
I'm kind of not sure if was really so clueless and had good intentions or he just did not care enough about me. There were many small things. For example, he went on a 3 week trip 9 family reunion) that was of planned before we met . First he hinted that he would be happy if I went with him and next he changed his mind because he thought it would be too much pressure for me.
He sent me a card from Miami telling me that he is looking for my birthday gift and that he is going to buy me something really special. Next, he showed up with some a very plain, silver necklace that 80 year old could wear. When he called from this trip, he was telling me that he spent more than 100 dollars just for a dinner for himself, but he probably spent like 25 bucks on this necklace.

You sound like a cunt.

That was uncalled for^^Jesus. Grow up! Anyway..it does sound like he was very kind to you..I always believe gratitude is better than criticism in general, so tell him all the things he did that were great too. Also everyone communicates differently, that's something you need to work out in every relationship. But if he's not meeting your needs its best to move on probably.

Oh sorry ungrateful too. I can't believe I left that out. I hope he heads for the hills. Peace soul suckers.

Holy shit, talk about entitled spoiled brat thinks her pussy is all that in a designer handbag syndrome!

EW stop being dicks.

It's the thought that counts, gifts are objects that are gestures that we are thinking about you.

Right about now I wouldn't mind spending time and eating out and a card.. Where do I sign up for that.. that's enough for me.

I think we can be high maintenance and materialistic and some guys don't like that and maybe some do. It's like everything I do or say is not good enough for a high maintenance type.

Even for me I'm probably the most materialistic and high maintenance type. You sure passed me up, you won....cause now I just want the effort of a planned dinner and card, with one on one time.

Wow thanks for the eye opener. And I can buy my own material possessions and don't need that from you. But the other thing yup anyday.

But the communication, dedication, trust, honesty, and stability is also important.

It's just like me asking you what kind of job you have and getting dumped because they see you would have a financial crisis later in life. I had a Taurus male tell me that he dropped a good woman because of that reason..

Hm I am not a guy but the ones I've met would have dropped a high maintenance, materialistic type. At least the masculine signs I have met. Look at me like wtf are you smoking.

I did not mentioned anything about this gift to him. I only expressed to him that I needed more communication, connection, openness and touch and I need to feel more valued.
In this areas I guess you could call me a high maintenance, but what is wrong with the fact that a woman needs a lot of touch during a foreplay. In my mind, if he really valued me, he would touch me more, he would be more open and communicate more with me.
I'm not materialistic or a designer bag type of girl. I'm actually very frugal. This Cancer man spends so much money on himself, at least $ 300-400 per week. He goes out like 3-4 times a week and spends money like water on drinks and food. He is generous so he also would pay for other people's drinks and food sometimes (including women.)
He also spent about 5,000 just on one trip, he went recently.
So a man who spends so much money on himself and his friends could have bought me a nice gift. A nice gift represents to me how much he values me. I was planning to buy him a plane ticket for his birthday to go to Oregon. A trip we were planning to go on.

I am not materialistic do not care about dining out. It is nice to go out for a dinner once in a few months, but it is also nice to stay in and cook together. I'm into healthy organic eating.

Im a Pisces lady with a cancer man 15 years (married for 8)
You need Patience, like a whole load, and then some. Don't hurt his feelings..OMG! My hubby ignores me for 3 days exactly, then he will talk to me about the problem which caused the row, only when HE is ready, he usually gently initiates the conversation, then i have talk kindly about what was said/done and apolojise in a roundabout way, then we are friends again, next statement is usually "whats for tea"

For any guy in general you are taking for granted read this, print it out, rinse and repeat. Or be alone forever. Maybe that's not such a bad thing. Some people just need to be alone to realize what they want and they are less of an a'hole to someone who actually cares about them.

http://www.elephantjournal.com/2014/11/7-things-to-bear-in-mind-when-communicating-with-a-man/

1. He just wants her to be happy.

When a man is in love with a woman and the woman is the centre of his universe, he wants her to be happy. It's not that complicated. In a mature relationship, all parties know they are responsible for their own happiness. Just because he loves her and wants her to be happy, it does not mean he can be blamed for it all when she is not.

2. He takes it personally when she is not happy.

Men generally process women's sharing quite differently and can take it personal when it was not intended to be. Oversharing and over-communicating unhappiness can lead him to come to the wrong deduction that he is not good enough, not trying hard enough, feel inadequate and/or come to the conclusion that the woman is too difficult or impossible to please or satisfy. Women should be careful not to shut their man out the relationship through their own downward spiral of negativity.



Those 2 are BIG ones