Ignoring old Cancer man...

This topic was created in the Cancer forum by christina1 on Wednesday, February 10, 2016 and has 20 replies.

Profile picture of christina1
@christina1
10 Years

I'll share a situation with my Cancer.
I know they change as they get older. Seducing a 20 year old Cancer is very different than seducing a old Cancer.

So, I met him 2 years ago and since then we are FWB( Well we don't had intercourse. We just do petting because I'm a virgin and I want to remain like that until he'll be certain to make a commitment). I told him I want something more serious and I wait for him to feel safe and free and have the necessary mood to make the commitment. No hurry with Cancer! (I'm an Aries so it's pretty unusual for me to have patience, but I'll do it for him).

I wanted to know If there's something more in this than pure sexual lust so i decided to ignore him 2 weeks ( Before this I've never done this to him, i replyed him everytime asap)
So he texted me saturday night asking me If I want to spend the night with him and to come and pick me from my house. I don't reply.
After 2 days he texted me "Baby you dissapeared on another planet?". I don't texted back.
After 3 days he started to texts me almost everyday, call me and after a week he became a little bit agressive...
After 2 weeks of No reply I decided to text him back and he told me to not do this ever again to him and also be somehow spicey/agressive with me.

Now I also ignore him sometimes but not too much because I don't want him to think I do this everytime voluntary. When I do that he threat me and texts me more often than usually.

So that's it. What you all think about that? This man is so confusing sometimes...so aloof that just make me feel like a piece of meat
Cancerians feel free to express yourself

xoxo

Profile picture of MoonArtist
@MoonArtist
12 Years10,000+ Posts

Ok, here's some female observations AND advice: OP has a fwb situation, but wants to make it into something more, so she tries to manipulate the man into caring about her or showing he cares about her, rather than having an honest discussion with him about her feelings and his. My advice, never EVER go into a fwb situation while expecting/hoping for something more, and don't try to manipulate the other person to get what you want. OP and her fuck buddy both sound immature and they're creating their own drama.

Profile picture of MoonArtist
@MoonArtist
12 Years10,000+ Posts

Posted by Finbuff
I know for a fact it is NOT an FWB situation. Never intended to be, but I suspect it might be what he wants - not certain. Assume it's not FWB until she tells us otherwise.

Ummmmm......the OP STATED in her post that it was FWB situation, but they don't have actual intercourse, they just mutually masturbate or "pet" each other. FWB means there's no relationship, just two people getting their jollies off together.

Profile picture of MoonArtist
@MoonArtist
12 Years10,000+ Posts

Fin, I read her post. She stated it's FWB and she wants more. If she didn't want FWB she shouldn't have agreed to that for 2 years. To agree with it while wanting more is immature and manipulative.

Profile picture of MoonArtist
@MoonArtist
12 Years10,000+ Posts

Posted by Aggrippina66789
Posted by MoonArtist
Fin, I read her post. She stated it's FWB and she wants more. If she didn't want FWB she shouldn't have agreed to that for 2 years. To agree with it while wanting more is immature and manipulative.

The amount of crap he is willing to put up with for sex is going to depend on how old and ugly he is..i would wager he is ...over 50 ...or else he would be walking...holding on through that for sex means he can't get anyone else. Or he does have some feelings.

click to expand

Or he has more gals he's getting it from. After all, he doesn't owe her loyalty or anything because they're not in a relationship.

Profile picture of Honeybunniie
@Honeybunniie
11 Years

The question is why put so much energy into this? 2 yrs has past and you guys are still standing in square one?? I see it as this is a lot of mind games n power struggle for control. If the goal is to get commitment, you're going about it the wrong way. This is toxic behavior. Just my opinion

Profile picture of TaurusMarine
@TaurusMarine
10 Years

Tell him honestly what you want with him and let him go. If he's there, he'll go for it. If no, no amount of trying is gonna change that whatever the star sign.
As I understand, ur saving yourself for someone special. So ask yourself, have you been happier with this man than without him? Is this connection is taking you in the direction you wanna go? If not, run forest run. There're lot's of guys out there probably not worse than this one. And there will be the one who will want the same future with you - that's the man for you. Your man will choose to be with you! And hoping and waiting for someone to change never changed anyone.
So relax, let go and bounce. Believe wise ppl who said all this, being in relationship just to be in a relationship sucks, it's kind of slavery. This bond should take you to your preferable direction , not opposite way. Wish you wisdom and love
XX

Profile picture of Lyte
@Lyte
10 Years

Posted by sultrykitty
Posted by AriesIntrovert16
Posted by Lyte
Posted by sultrykitty
Posted by Lyte
Posted by sultrykitty
He's probably ancient. Like 35 or something...

seriously?

Why not? I mean, you might as well roll over and die at that point.

smh... when ur 35, come back and let us know if u feel like rolling over and dying...

She probably is 35. I believe she was being sarcastic, you know, Cap moon humor. 😛

A bit over. 😉

click to expand

ugh... and of course because I'm almost there [35] and i've got a taurus sun [too serious sometimes] and cancer AS [emotional] i'm being way to ridiculous... lol... carry on

Profile picture of LadyNeptune
@LadyNeptune
10 Years25,000+ Posts

So let me see if I got this right...

You know the difference between seducing a younger man vs an older man... BUT your a virgin... BUT you need help with your fuck buddy situation.

You thinking that your a special unicorn because you won't let him stick his dick in you is your first mistake. Your letting him touch all over you and come on your tits... he's getting off, so it's the same shit really. He's busting his nut either way. You 'playing' reserved in order to trick him into giving you something more will never work, as evidenced by the continual fwb

You want him to feel "safe and secure so that he'll commit". Nothing says safe like going ghost on someone for weeks at a time after they extend an invitation your way. Smh.

If he hasn't given you the gf crown after 2 years of your fuckery, it just isn't gonna happen. Gameplay and mind games are not usually highly sought qualities when one searches for a partner.

Profile picture of christina1
@christina1
10 Years

I forgot to mention: NEVER INTENDED TO BE A FWB.
We liked each other, we started our relationship like 2 normal humans. After some time i realized...we just get along very well in bed. Every date with him is full of passion and sexuality. I want more in that way: to seeeachother more frequently and do a lot of things toghether, plus sex, but not just sex.
Sometimes he really play the role of a boyfriend but sometimes i feel he just don t want to commit smth.....so it remain

So it wasn t intended it to be an FWB, but he's been pushing in that direction...because he knew i will just run away from him if he was honest at first