In a relationship with pisces man.

My pisces man and I are together since this year March. At first he was so loving and he gives a lot of effort. Recently our work schedule has been longer than usual because of the pandemic. WE both work 12 hours a day. Sometimes on different shifts in the morning and night. I can understand that our jobs is so tiring and stressful. But i really wanted him to take me out on our off days. He promised me a lot of times and ends up being cancelled because he usually sleeps in on our off days (again i can understand this because i know how tiring our job is) but i feel upset because i think he is so used to me being here that he takes me for granted and doesnt put in effort in our relationship anymore. Im probably over reacting but i honestly feel hurt about this. We are living together and when we are together. We are usually on both our individual screens. Which im not a fan of. I already told him this but nothing really has changed. Earlier i packed some of my things and i decided to go home to my parents for a few days. I think i hurt him because of that. I feel guilty. Im leo woman

Posted by Dreamy88

I'm guilty of getting a little too comfortable in a relationship and have a tendency to forget I have a girlfriend who has her own feelings and her needs, so I've heard the "taking me for granted" card a lot.

May i ask why you “took her for granted”? Is it because she doesnt excite you anymore? Is it because you dont love her anymore? Or is it because she doesnt live up to what you were expecting from her? Im asking this for myself. I want clarity. This is hurting me so much and im starting to feel insecure about it.

Pisces are gentle souls who care most about the satisfaction of a loved one. He was probably giving you as much as he could at this "tiring and stressful" time. Treating you as he wanted to be treated himself, most likely even better. Hearing that he doesn't please you probably felt the same as hearing he is impotent.

You could have done it differently.

1) You "really wanted him to take you out". What are you, a dog? Did you talk about a compromise? It's a pandemic out there! For example, you could have got a Michelin star cooking book and prepare dinner together. Then dress up, decorate the table, open the wine bottle. Talk face to face for an hour or so, like on a proper date. Take selfies and put them on IG, if you want even more attention.

2) "We are usually on both our individual screens. Which im not a fan of. I already told him this but nothing really has changed." Why are you on your screen, then? You make it sound like it's all his fault, when you are doing the same! That's hypocrisy. Again, what you could have done differently, was to discuss and decide together when, how and what. Maybe he feels more stressed and exhausted than you are. Maybe holding hands on a musical background, caressing, smiling at you every now and then, was all he could do, while recharging at home. You could have told him all about your day at work, your thoughts on mundane issues, whatever your friends told you, everything. Like a good extrovert that you are! Pisces are good listeners.

But of course, it doesn't really matter what he feels comfortable giving you, does it...? You just want it your way. I know what a Pisces thinks when this happens. That you are unfair, uncompromising and hurtful. And that ultimately you two have different ways of dealing with important issues, are therefore are not compatible.

Posted by rufflestruffles

Posted by Dreamy88

I'm guilty of getting a little too comfortable in a relationship and have a tendency to forget I have a girlfriend who has her own feelings and her needs, so I've heard the "taking me for granted" card a lot.

May i ask why you “took her for granted”? Is it because she doesnt excite you anymore? Is it because you dont love her anymore? Or is it because she doesnt live up to what you were expecting from her? Im asking this for myself. I want clarity. This is hurting me so much and im starting to feel insecure about it.

click to expand

He was being himself, like everyone should be in a relationship.

Posted by Undine

Pisces are gentle souls who care most about the satisfaction of a loved one. He was probably giving you as much as he could at this "tiring and stressful" time. Treating you as he wanted to be treated himself, most likely even better. Hearing that he doesn't please you probably felt the same as hearing he is impotent.

You could have done it differently.

1) You "really wanted him to take you out". What are you, a dog? Did you talk about a compromise? It's a pandemic out there! For example, you could have got a Michelin star cooking book and prepare dinner together. Then dress up, decorate the table, open the wine bottle. Talk face to face for an hour or so, like on a proper date. Take selfies and put them on IG, if you want even more attention.

2) "We are usually on both our individual screens. Which im not a fan of. I already told him this but nothing really has changed." Why are you on your screen, then? You make it sound like it's all his fault, when you are doing the same! That's hypocrisy. Again, what you could have done differently, was to discuss and decide together when, how and what. Maybe he feels more stressed and exhausted than you are. Maybe holding hands on a musical background, caressing, smiling at you every now and then, was all he could do, while recharging at home. You could have told him all about your day at work, your thoughts on mundane issues, whatever your friends told you, everything. Like a good extrovert that you are! Pisces are good listeners.

But of course, it doesn't really matter what he feels comfortable giving you, does it...? You just want it your way. I know what a Pisces thinks when this happens. That you are unfair, uncompromising and hurtful. And that ultimately you two have different ways of dealing with important issues, are therefore are not compatible.

To answer your points:

1. I did compromise with him, everytime he promise me that we would go, it gets cancelled because he was too lazy to get up and go. And i always give him the consideration because i know he is tired and stressed too

- you are making it sound like im inconsiderate and i only think about myself which is unfair for me.

- to also correct you. I dont have social media. I dont take selfies and post it. Im not the usual leo who likes attention from strangers.

-what i would like is for him to give me some quality time. (Which i already told him a thousand times)

2. When he is focused on his screen. What do you want me to do then? Latch onto him and invade his screen time? I am trying to be considerate because i know that is his “me time”.

-also to tell you, i am not an extrovert. Why do you think i would be posting here asking for strangers advice if i have a ton of people i can talk with

regarding this?

Of course at the end of the day. Its the leo’s fault right? No matter the situation its always the leo’s fault because we just want attention.

Posted by rufflestruffles

Posted by Undine

Pisces are gentle souls who care most about the satisfaction of a loved one. He was probably giving you as much as he could at this "tiring and stressful" time. Treating you as he wanted to be treated himself, most likely even better. Hearing that he doesn't please you probably felt the same as hearing he is impotent.

You could have done it differently.

1) You "really wanted him to take you out". What are you, a dog? Did you talk about a compromise? It's a pandemic out there! For example, you could have got a Michelin star cooking book and prepare dinner together. Then dress up, decorate the table, open the wine bottle. Talk face to face for an hour or so, like on a proper date. Take selfies and put them on IG, if you want even more attention.

2) "We are usually on both our individual screens. Which im not a fan of. I already told him this but nothing really has changed." Why are you on your screen, then? You make it sound like it's all his fault, when you are doing the same! That's hypocrisy. Again, what you could have done differently, was to discuss and decide together when, how and what. Maybe he feels more stressed and exhausted than you are. Maybe holding hands on a musical background, caressing, smiling at you every now and then, was all he could do, while recharging at home. You could have told him all about your day at work, your thoughts on mundane issues, whatever your friends told you, everything. Like a good extrovert that you are! Pisces are good listeners.

But of course, it doesn't really matter what he feels comfortable giving you, does it...? You just want it your way. I know what a Pisces thinks when this happens. That you are unfair, uncompromising and hurtful. And that ultimately you two have different ways of dealing with important issues, are therefore are not compatible.

To answer your points:

1. I did compromise with him, everytime he promise me that we would go, it gets cancelled because he was too lazy to get up and go. And i always give him the consideration because i know he is tired and stressed too

- you are making it sound like im inconsiderate and i only think about myself which is unfair for me.

- to also correct you. I dont have social media. I dont take selfies and post it. Im not the usual leo who likes attention from strangers.

-what i would like is for him to give me some quality time. (Which i already told him a thousand times)

2. When he is focused on his screen. What do you want me to do then? Latch onto him and invade his screen time? I am trying to be considerate because i know that is his “me time”.

-also to tell you, i am not an extrovert. Why do you think i would be posting here asking for strangers advice if i have a ton of people i can talk with

regarding this?

Of course at the end of the day. Its the leo’s fault right? No matter the situation its always the leo’s fault because we just want attention.

click to expand

I know your screen name from years ago, and although I don't remember our interaction, my emotional brain "remembers" you as feisty, stubborn, defensive and unable to listen to advice. Hey, you didn't change 🙂

It's not him who has an issue with you (as far as we know). It's you who brought up a relationship problem, and therefore should have come up with the solutions you want, not just with accusations. Both of you need to talk, compromise and agree on the best solutions. His needs are exactly as important as yours!

"I did compromise with him, everytime he promise me that we would go, it gets cancelled because he was too lazy to get up and go. And i always give him the consideration because i know he is tired and stressed too"

^^^This is not a compromise. You've got your way when he "agreed" to do something he didn't want to, under pressure. Then you became resentful when he couldn't do it. A compromise would have been to agree to "go out" after the stress/pandemic/ money worries/ whatever is depressing him has passed. Meanwhile, do something else --at home or outdoors-- that you both want to and enjoy.

However, if this is a deal breaker for you, maybe you should call it a day!

LOL @ working 12hour shifts during a pandemic then demanding to be taken out DURING A PANDEMIC.

What is even open? The drive through. Pick up.

He's gonna take you on a hot date at CVS and you can drink cardboard box wine in the parking lot.

Take a chill pill and don't make this all about me, me, me. What does he want? Have you stopped to ask him lately? Cause seems like he wants to sleep in on his days off without his gf nagging. jfc

I have dated a lot of Pisces men and I feel like they mean well when they say they are going to do something but a lot of times they don't fall thru.

As a fellow Leo woman I understand where you are coming from. We can be understanding but at the same time we also need that attention... and promises that aren't kept are hurtful because we remember those promises.

I understand wanting to go out but I also understand the need to want to rest on your day off. Is there anything stopping you from snuggling up in bed together and watch a movie or binge watch something on Netflix or whatever? Order in dinner from your favorite restaurant. Play video or board games together?

If you are already getting bored in this relationship there is no way you're going to last in the long run. Living together after a while affords a type of comforbility. Sounds like you need to talk to him... let him know you guys need a date night once a month.

omg pls just take naps together

he's obviously tired let him sleep

For those who are negatively judging about why i wanted him to take me out. I dont live in the US and the Quarantine in our country has already been lifted. People can go out, restaurants are open theres also a drive in movie theather open. Theres a lot of things we can do. Our relationship started pre pandemic. So forgive me if i have been wanting to be on a date with him because i havent been so in a few months since march. We order in almost everyday of the week because we are both so tired to prepare dinner when we get home. We watch netflix all the time, this is what im talking about individual screen time. And on the rare chance that we have the same off day the promises of going out are always cancelled. So forgive me for wanting the normal things anyone wants in a relationship. We always do what he wants because it always ends up staying in. But what about what i want? Yeah screw what i want because i only like attention right? People are so easy to judge.

Posted by SeaLion

I have dated a lot of Pisces men and I feel like they mean well when they say they are going to do something but a lot of times they don't fall thru.

As a fellow Leo woman I understand where you are coming from. We can be understanding but at the same time we also need that attention... and promises that aren't kept are hurtful because we remember those promises.

I understand wanting to go out but I also understand the need to want to rest on your day off. Is there anything stopping you from snuggling up in bed together and watch a movie or binge watch something on Netflix or whatever? Order in dinner from your favorite restaurant. Play video or board games together?

If you are already getting bored in this relationship there is no way you're going to last in the long run. Living together after a while affords a type of comforbility. Sounds like you need to talk to him... let him know you guys need a date night once a month.

Thank you for this. I think i understand it better now. And thanks for the ideas. I know he means well. Like i mentioned earlier. I try to be considerate because i know he is tired from work. I just feel a little taken for granted. Because im always here when he gets home. I think he feels like i wont leave him no matter what. (Im not sure if its true but it surely crossed my mind). I will talk to him. Again thank you for this.

Posted by Dreamy88

Posted by rufflestruffles

Posted by Dreamy88

I'm guilty of getting a little too comfortable in a relationship and have a tendency to forget I have a girlfriend who has her own feelings and her needs, so I've heard the "taking me for granted" card a lot.

May i ask why you “took her for granted”? Is it because she doesnt excite you anymore? Is it because you dont love her anymore? Or is it because she doesnt live up to what you were expecting from her? Im asking this for myself. I want clarity. This is hurting me so much and im starting to feel insecure about it.

It's none of those. For me it's just a habit that I have to check myself. Everything will be fine and I just will become forgetful. If I see everything is fine and coasting in the relationship, I'll start to just cruise in the relationship and that's what brings the problems. Maybe he thinks everything is fine so he's in cruise mode.

I could be with the most perfect woman for me and I'll still do this.

click to expand

You know what. I think you are probably right. A pisces man point of view really helps a lot. You describe it exactly how it is happening. He is on cruise mode! I didnt realize it until now that you have said it. Any tips on how i can remind/snap him out of cruise mode without sounding like a crazy person? I dont want to hurt his feelings. I honestly do everything i can to understand him. I want him to also have his time at the same time dont forget about me. I dont need all his attention. I have things i can be busy with too. I just want some time together. To do things out of our routine. I feel like we are already an old married couple. Where everything is only on repeat.

You coulda done the following

Breakfast in bed

Lunch in bed

Dinner in bed

Romantic dinner in the living room. With a fort, pillows, candles and one fork

Think outside the box

He has a job during the pandemic. Tiring job at that

Gotta be a team player and make sacrifices 2

Posted by Undine

1) You "really wanted him to take you out". What are you, a dog? Did you talk about a compromise? It's a pandemic out there! For example, you could have got a Michelin star cooking book and prepare dinner together. Then dress up, decorate the table, open the wine bottle. Talk face to face for an hour or so, like on a proper date. Take selfies and put them on IG, if you want even more attention.

This sounds fun. I like.

Posted by rufflestruffles

My pisces man and I are together since this year March. At first he was so loving and he gives a lot of effort. Recently our work schedule has been longer than usual because of the pandemic. WE both work 12 hours a day. Sometimes on different shifts in the morning and night. I can understand that our jobs is so tiring and stressful. But i really wanted him to take me out on our off days. He promised me a lot of times and ends up being cancelled because he usually sleeps in on our off days (again i can understand this because i know how tiring our job is) but i feel upset because i think he is so used to me being here that he takes me for granted and doesnt put in effort in our relationship anymore. Im probably over reacting but i honestly feel hurt about this. We are living together and when we are together. We are usually on both our individual screens. Which im not a fan of. I already told him this but nothing really has changed. Earlier i packed some of my things and i decided to go home to my parents for a few days. I think i hurt him because of that. I feel guilty. Im leo woman

Can you explain the different shifts, please?

Like do you work 7am-7pm and he works 7pm-7am?

A few ideas-

Let him pick the restaurant. That way he’s more interested in going

Stop nagging him. He’s not doing what you want because you’re annoying. Play it cool. Act less interested in him and watch him come to you.

FYI the Pisces I dated was boring. Same problem. Worked long hours and then stayed home. We don’t date anymore, but he’s been reaching out a bunch lately wanting to and although I have a bf I’m like nahhh never again.

Communication is key

That’s why most marriages end in divorce especially after you have kids.

Relationships require watering most people forget.

With 12 hour shifts you're lucky he is still in a relationship with you because i would have clocked out from that second job time ago

Can you explain the different shifts, please?

Like do you work 7am-7pm and he works 7pm-7am?

Exactly like this.

Posted by rufflestruffles

Can you explain the different shifts, please?

Like do you work 7am-7pm and he works 7pm-7am?

Exactly like this.

click to expand

That’d be really hard to have any kind of relationship with let alone trying to find time to actually go out. You guys are ships passing in the night!

I can't see Leo with Pisces for some reason. OP, break up with him and get with an Aries.

Posted by rufflestruffles

Can you explain the different shifts, please?

Like do you work 7am-7pm and he works 7pm-7am?

Exactly like this.

click to expand

Do you realize how difficult it is to flip a sleep schedule? Do you realize what toll working 7pm-7am takes on your mind and body?

Posted by _Dazed

Posted by rufflestruffles

Can you explain the different shifts, please?

Like do you work 7am-7pm and he works 7pm-7am?

Exactly like this.

Do you realize how difficult it is to flip a sleep schedule? Do you realize what toll working 7pm-7am takes on your mind and body?

click to expand

Of course i know how this is like. I have the same shifts as him. We change shifts every two weeks. So i know exactly how it is for him. Because im experiencing the same thing. I work night shift and day shift same as him. Yet i still want to make it work. I know not everyone can easily adjust sleep. It takes me almost 10 days to finally adjust sleep with the help of sleeping pills. I get what you are trying to say.

Posted by Tenpxd

Relationships require watering most people forget.

This is my thoughts exactly. A day of watering every month. People seem to forget this. I know our lives are busy. People in a serious relationship should put in some effort to make it work. We are two actual people who both has emotions and feelings.

Posted by Dreamy88

Posted by rufflestruffles

Posted by Dreamy88

Posted by rufflestruffles

Posted by Dreamy88

I'm guilty of getting a little too comfortable in a relationship and have a tendency to forget I have a girlfriend who has her own feelings and her needs, so I've heard the "taking me for granted" card a lot.

May i ask why you “took her for granted”? Is it because she doesnt excite you anymore? Is it because you dont love her anymore? Or is it because she doesnt live up to what you were expecting from her? Im asking this for myself. I want clarity. This is hurting me so much and im starting to feel insecure about it.

It's none of those. For me it's just a habit that I have to check myself. Everything will be fine and I just will become forgetful. If I see everything is fine and coasting in the relationship, I'll start to just cruise in the relationship and that's what brings the problems. Maybe he thinks everything is fine so he's in cruise mode.

I could be with the most perfect woman for me and I'll still do this.

You know what. I think you are probably right. A pisces man point of view really helps a lot. You describe it exactly how it is happening. He is on cruise mode! I didnt realize it until now that you have said it. Any tips on how i can remind/snap him out of cruise mode without sounding like a crazy person? I dont want to hurt his feelings. I honestly do everything i can to understand him. I want him to also have his time at the same time dont forget about me. I dont need all his attention. I have things i can be busy with too. I just want some time together. To do things out of our routine. I feel like we are already an old married couple. Where everything is only on repeat.

Well it's hard to say, as everyone is different and reacts to different ways that'll make them get up and do something. I'm referring to your Pisces. What a lot of my exes and my current gf does is, say a plan was made and the plan was agreed on and the time comes and I suddenly feel lazy or want to procrastinate. They're already set on going. They get dressed, already looking cute, and wait on me or are in the process of getting ready and not stopping for me. It makes me feel forced to get ready.

Of course I'd rather stay at home relaxed, but if I feel rushed, I get into the mode of having to get ready too.

I'm not saying yours will do the same. It's just how I get initiated to get up.

If this is on a workday though, then that's probably most definitely not a good time. You both work 12s on different shifts so I get that you both have a time crunch to try and fit quality time together.

Maybe what you can suggest, is for somebody to schedule paid time off of work. Have him schedule a day that compliments his day off so that he gets an extra day off in a row, so say for example he's off Saturdays and Sundays. Have him get a Friday off and you both go out on a Friday or Saturday.

You should also consider that maybe he's not going out often because of covid. Consider something that easily incorporates social distancing and a low amount of people. For example, fishing, golfing, frisbee golf at the park, or maybe private time at the park with some beers and a bbq grill.

I myself love going to bars, but I haven't been to one since lockdown. Bars are opened now, but I don't want to be there and that's my favorite place.

What are the type of things you've planned for each other to do?

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You gave me a wonderful idea. I will try this next time. I just want to go out and do some bbq or probably have a nice stroll, eat ice cream, talk a little. Go home. I want some change of scenery other than the apartment we have. I want to break some of the routine. Nothing big that requires being in a crowded place.