@Captivate86
8 Years
Unbridled Honesty from Men
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No. Does not affect me at all.
Not at all. I'm confident enough to realize that a woman wanting to have sex with me on a first date is a sign of attraction.
I’m just here to read the responses. 👀
I ask because a Capricorn buddy of mine from college recently told me, “ I can’t trust a woman who has sex with me on a first date. Especially oral sex. Surely I can’t be the first. And all I can think about is how many other guys she did that with, whilst telling them this is rare behavior and she’s just that attracted to them. Yeah, okay.”
I think this is a pretty immature way to look at it, honestly. And why attack her value and credibility as a woman just because she shared physical intimacy with you? Anyway, I was curious if this was a shared belief with men.
Posted by UnicornSag
Not a man but short note of experience...don't do it with a Sag man...you'll regret it lol all I can say...
You know what... the Sag I dated told me that. Like I gave a fuck. I slept with him on the 1st dat but didn't have sex with him. I guess I was supposed to feel special.
Woulda hurt his feelings if I told him I slept with, what was then, my ex-husband on the 1st date... and, he married me!
Posted by Redbull
Lot of questions on here about men. There are no easy or absolute answers though. It could come down to a case by case basis, some people may be more "set in stone" so to speak, could depend on variety of factors of the particular situation, etc. I get the desire to have answers, but you are taking whatever risks you are taking with your behavior and choices. Just how it is.
Answer the question please sir. Does getting the custard pie on the 1st date affect how YOU see the women?
I'm guessing yes by your hesitation.
Yes.
It was easy, effortless, and required nothing to achieve. So nothing is what she means to me.
Sag men scare me. My half-brother is one...and he’ll sweep a woman off her feet like it’s something out of a romantic comedy...but he’ll be doing it with 3 or 4 other women, too.
Posted by Taniwha
If she blows my mind half way to Andromeda with some inter-dimensional love making then Ill see her as a goddess.
Posted by Soul
Yes.It was easy, effortless, and required nothing to achieve. So nothing is what she means to me.
Finally some honesty..
Posted by Captivate86
I ask because a Capricorn buddy of mine from college recently told me, “ I can’t trust a woman who has sex with me on a first date. Especially oral sex. Surely I can’t be the first. And all I can think about is how many other guys she did that with, whilst telling them this is rare behavior and she’s just that attracted to them. Yeah, okay.”I think this is a pretty immature way to look at it, honestly. And why attack her value and credibility as a woman just because she shared physical intimacy with you? Anyway, I was curious if this was a shared belief with men.
Oh, it just means that he doesn't think he's special and needs to feel special.
Posted by Yodi
Posted by Soul
Yes.It was easy, effortless, and required nothing to achieve. So nothing is what she means to me.
Finally some honesty..
click to expand
Now, I'm thinking this question depends on the age of the individuals.
Can you imagine giving a damn at 40 or 50?
Posted by UnicornSag
Posted by VenusAquarius
Posted by UnicornSag
Not a man but short note of experience...don't do it with a Sag man...you'll regret it lol all I can say...
You know what... the Sag I dated told me that. Like I gave a fuck. I slept with him on the 1st dat but didn't have sex with him. I guess I was supposed to feel special.
Woulda hurt his feelings if I told him I slept with, what was then, my ex-husband on the 1st date... and, he married me! click to expand
Well I was fool enough to make that "horrible mistake" with a Sag guy that made me never ever want to have anything to do with any Sag guy ever lol God help those who found themselves in such situation...and yeah, even if you did it with someone else you're better off not saying it to them. Narrow mindness comes in it's finest form from such irrelevant thing with them...See, difference between your husband and that guy is huge, that's what I'm talking about. I guess he's not a Sag lol
click to expand
Hubby is a Virgo (the Virgin). How ironic. He was my 1st sex on 1st and my last I think.
I just wanted to be in his arms so bad, I didn't care if I ever saw him again. The date lasted 4 days with me washing my undies in his sink. Even then I was thinking, "he's just trying to get enough of me."
class="bqexpand"> Posted by UnicornSag
Posted by Captivate86
I ask because a Capricorn buddy of mine from college recently told me, “ I can’t trust a woman who has sex with me on a first date. Especially oral sex. Surely I can’t be the first. And all I can think about is how many other guys she did that with, whilst telling them this is rare behavior and she’s just that attracted to them. Yeah, okay.”I think this is a pretty immature way to look at it, honestly. And why attack her value and credibility as a woman just because she shared physical intimacy with you? Anyway, I was curious if this was a shared belief with men.
This was exactly the thing with Sag I mentioned...God how narrow minded people can be! And the irony is he was the first guy to ever get to do something like that with, but burned me well enough to not bother doing same thing again... click to expand
click to expand
The downside: It makes us overly self-conscious about being sexually expressive. Which might affect our relationships with others that may deserve our openness.
The upside: If we get burned by someone judging us for expressing ourselves intimately as women, then that makes us even more cautious when choosing our partners. Which we should be.
Posted by VenusAquarius
Posted by Yodi
Posted by Soul
Yes.It was easy, effortless, and required nothing to achieve. So nothing is what she means to me.
Finally some honesty..
Now, I'm thinking this question depends on the age of the individuals.
Can you imagine giving a damn at 40 or 50?
click to expand
That's still young tho.. idk maybe it's just me but at 60ish going on 70 if I'm single I'm dating nothing but 21 -30 year olds..
Yurp I'm a suga momma in the making 😂😂😂😂
class="bqexpand"> Posted by VenusAquarius
Posted by Yodi
Posted by Soul
Yes.It was easy, effortless, and required nothing to achieve. So nothing is what she means to me.
Finally some honesty..
Now, I'm thinking this question depends on the age of the individuals.
Can you imagine giving a damn at 40 or 50? click to expand
click to expand
loli dont think most guys at 20s, 30s give a damn either.
i saw most of the men say no. lol good thing too. except for @soul ... lol
my husband also thinks the same way as most of the guys too.
Posted by Captivate86
Posted by UnicornSag
Posted by Captivate86
I ask because a Capricorn buddy of mine from college recently told me, “ I can’t trust a woman who has sex with me on a first date. Especially oral sex. Surely I can’t be the first. And all I can think about is how many other guys she did that with, whilst telling them this is rare behavior and she’s just that attracted to them. Yeah, okay.”I think this is a pretty immature way to look at it, honestly. And why attack her value and credibility as a woman just because she shared physical intimacy with you? Anyway, I was curious if this was a shared belief with men.
This was exactly the thing with Sag I mentioned...God how narrow minded people can be! And the irony is he was the first guy to ever get to do something like that with, but burned me well enough to not bother doing same thing again... click to expand
The downside: It makes us overly self-conscious about being sexually expressive. Which might affect our relationships with others that may deserve our openness.
The upside: If we get burned by someone judging us for expressing ourselves intimately as women, then that makes us even more cautious when choosing our partners. Which we should be.
click to expand
And, it makes for poor performance because you were too nervous thinking about what he may be thinking of you.
So, if your gonna do it. Make sure you really want him so bad, you think this is your only chance, and you don't care if you ever see him again.
That's how I felt about my hubby. I went and bought the most delicate lingerie, cream, laced yarn. OMG... and, I bought beautiful lingerie for each and every date to make him wonder.
Posted by UnicornSag
Posted by VenusAquarius
Posted by UnicornSag
Posted by VenusAquarius
Posted by UnicornSag
Not a man but short note of experience...don't do it with a Sag man...you'll regret it lol all I can say...
You know what... the Sag I dated told me that. Like I gave a fuck. I slept with him on the 1st dat but didn't have sex with him. I guess I was supposed to feel special.
Woulda hurt his feelings if I told him I slept with, what was then, my ex-husband on the 1st date... and, he married me! click to expand
Well I was fool enough to make that "horrible mistake" with a Sag guy that made me never ever want to have anything to do with any Sag guy ever lol God help those who found themselves in such situation...and yeah, even if you did it with someone else you're better off not saying it to them. Narrow mindness comes in it's finest form from such irrelevant thing with them...See, difference between your husband and that guy is huge, that's what I'm talking about. I guess he's not a Sag lol
Hubby is a Virgo (the Virgin). How ironic. He was my 1st sex on 1st and my last I think.
I just wanted to be in his arms so bad, I didn't care if I ever saw him again. The date lasted 4 day with me washing my undies in his sink. Even then I was thinking, "he's just trying to get enough of me." click to expand
lol that's so funny, see the ones you'd expect to be the least judgmental turn ot to be the worst and the ones you could expect to be the worst are quite opposite! After this Sag idiot I also meet a Virgo...I was in an awful place since the event with Sag, he mentally completely destroyed me over months after. Virgo was a complete refreshment and we ended up sleeping together on 2nd date actually. I literally thought, "this was so amazing that I won't regret even if I never see him again" and there he was texting and all sweet right in the next morning! We've been together ever since and ofc there was no one else since then and I hope it stays like that
click to expand
Yaaaaaaaay!!! For Virgos!
class="bqexpand"> Posted by UnicornSag
Posted by VenusAquarius
Posted by UnicornSag
Posted by VenusAquarius
Posted by UnicornSag
Not a man but short note of experience...don't do it with a Sag man...you'll regret it lol all I can say...
You know what... the Sag I dated told me that. Like I gave a treetrunk. I slept with him on the 1st dat but didn't have sex with him. I guess I was supposed to feel special.
Woulda hurt his feelings if I told him I slept with, what was then, my ex-husband on the 1st date... and, he married me! click to expand
Well I was fool enough to make that "horrible mistake" with a Sag guy that made me never ever want to have anything to do with any Sag guy ever lol God help those who found themselves in such situation...and yeah, even if you did it with someone else you're better off not saying it to them. Narrow mindness comes in it's finest form from such irrelevant thing with them...See, difference between your husband and that guy is huge, that's what I'm talking about. I guess he's not a Sag lol
Hubby is a Virgo (the Virgin). How ironic. He was my 1st sex on 1st and my last I think.
I just wanted to be in his arms so bad, I didn't care if I ever saw him again. The date lasted 4 day with me washing my undies in his sink. Even then I was thinking, "he's just trying to get enough of me." click to expand
lol that's so funny, see the ones you'd expect to be the least judgmental turn ot to be the worst and the ones you could expect to be the worst are quite opposite! After this Sag idiot I also meet a Virgo...I was in an awful place since the event with Sag, he mentally completely destroyed me over months after. Virgo was a complete refreshment and we ended up sleeping together on 2nd date actually. I literally thought, "this was so amazing that I won't regret even if I never see him again" and there he was texting and all sweet right in the next morning! We've been together ever since and ofc there was no one else since then and I hope it stays like that click to expand
click to expand
That is so sweet! I don’t even know you, and I’m excited and happy for you!
I think this is what most women hope for after sharing ourselves intimately. Like...yes, lose yourself in the moment and truly appreciate it, but still be cared for and emotionally nuzzled post-coitus.
Posted by Taniwha
If she takes a long time to sleep with you it tells you that she is considering the relationship more seriously, shes investing in her emotional needs first, rather than just the physical. That tells me that shes got an emotional interest in me and is interested in more than just sex. If she's sleeping with me on the first date its most likely because she knows that she wont be effected by it if things go sour and I split, it says she doesn't care what I think of her. If she wont sleep with me it says shes concerned with what I think of her, It says that shes worried that If I don't call her back afterwards that she is going to feel hurt. It tells me that she is willing to invest time and energy into a relationship with me. Her not sleeping with me straight away makes me feel important to her.
This...on so many levels. Thank you for sharing your insight. It’s so profound that I had to take a screenshot of it.
Posted by UnicornSag
Posted by VenusAquarius
Posted by UnicornSag
Posted by VenusAquarius
Posted by UnicornSag
Not a man but short note of experience...don't do it with a Sag man...you'll regret it lol all I can say...
You know what... the Sag I dated told me that. Like I gave a fuck. I slept with him on the 1st dat but didn't have sex with him. I guess I was supposed to feel special.
Woulda hurt his feelings if I told him I slept with, what was then, my ex-husband on the 1st date... and, he married me! click to expand
Well I was fool enough to make that "horrible mistake" with a Sag guy that made me never ever want to have anything to do with any Sag guy ever lol God help those who found themselves in such situation...and yeah, even if you did it with someone else you're better off not saying it to them. Narrow mindness comes in it's finest form from such irrelevant thing with them...See, difference between your husband and that guy is huge, that's what I'm talking about. I guess he's not a Sag lol
Hubby is a Virgo (the Virgin). How ironic. He was my 1st sex on 1st and my last I think.
I just wanted to be in his arms so bad, I didn't care if I ever saw him again. The date lasted 4 day with me washing my undies in his sink. Even then I was thinking, "he's just trying to get enough of me." click to expand
lol that's so funny, see the ones you'd expect to be the least judgmental turn ot to be the worst and the ones you could expect to be the worst are quite opposite! After this Sag idiot I also meet a Virgo...I was in an awful place since the event with Sag, he mentally completely destroyed me over months after. Virgo was a complete refreshment and we ended up sleeping together on 2nd date actually. I literally thought, "this was so amazing that I won't regret even if I never see him again" and there he was texting and all sweet right in the next morning! We've been together ever since and ofc there was no one else since then and I hope it stays like that
click to expand
My hubby is very critical but not judgmental. He will call a spade a spade. And is picky... but, has his OWN criteria... not societal.
lol
@ taking too long to sleep with you.
if she takes too long, she dont want you. that could be construed that way. More like, "ewwww gross... " and then leaves. That is a huge blow to the man's ego though. if the man dont want you back then no harm done. both dont want eachother.
ifshe wants to jump your bones, she is burning up for you. lol
class="bqexpand"> Posted by AstroPlus
Posted by Captivate86
Since we are all afforded anonymity on here, I want to ask something in hopes that men will be completely honest in their answer.My question is: Does a woman’s sleeping with you(having sex with you) on the first date affect how you see her as a person?
I don't know if most guys will answer this honestly, because not all dates are created equally. There are pretty much 3 types of dates... to hook up, to get to know better, & first time meeting dates, and every guy knows in their heads which type of date they're on.
If the goal is, and always was, to hook up with the other person; No. It will have little effect on how they see the person. That's pretty much how they've always seen them.
If the goal is to get to know the other person better it's kind of 50/50, and pretty much depends on how the Woman approached it.
If the goal is to meet them for the first time; Probably, yes. It'll likely affect how the guy perceives you going forward.
Me, personally, I like to work for it. I don't like drunk and slutty or to have it tossed at me in the middle of the appetizer (on a first date). That pretty much goes for all 3 date types to varying degrees of effort. click to expand
click to expand
This is raw truth, thank you.
Shoot...I really liked a guy recently and on our first date, I rubbed his leg at dinner and we spooned and fell asleep together back at my place. That was the whole reason for my coming to this site in the first place. Because he became distant.
I think that may have been too slutty. 😳 Either way, lesson learned and I’m not kissing anyone or touching their leg on a first date anymore.
Posted by Captivate86
I ask because a Capricorn buddy of mine from college recently told me, “ I can’t trust a woman who has sex with me on a first date. Especially oral sex. Surely I can’t be the first. And all I can think about is how many other guys she did that with, whilst telling them this is rare behavior and she’s just that attracted to them. Yeah, okay.”I think this is a pretty immature way to look at it, honestly. And why attack her value and credibility as a woman just because she shared physical intimacy with you? Anyway, I was curious if this was a shared belief with men.
Your Cap buddy is basing his opinion on the average woman who has sex on the first date. His opinion is logical.
Posted by Captivate86
Posted by AstroPlus
Posted by Captivate86
Since we are all afforded anonymity on here, I want to ask something in hopes that men will be completely honest in their answer.My question is: Does a woman’s sleeping with you(having sex with you) on the first date affect how you see her as a person?
I don't know if most guys will answer this honestly, because not all dates are created equally. There are pretty much 3 types of dates... to hook up, to get to know better, & first time meeting dates, and every guy knows in their heads which type of date they're on.
If the goal is, and always was, to hook up with the other person; No. It will have little effect on how they see the person. That's pretty much how they've always seen them.
If the goal is to get to know the other person better it's kind of 50/50, and pretty much depends on how the Woman approached it.
If the goal is to meet them for the first time; Probably, yes. It'll likely affect how the guy perceives you going forward.
Me, personally, I like to work for it. I don't like drunk and slutty or to have it tossed at me in the middle of the appetizer (on a first date). That pretty much goes for all 3 date types to varying degrees of effort. click to expand
This is raw truth, thank you.
Shoot...I really liked a guy recently and on our first date, I rubbed his leg at dinner and we spooned and fell asleep together back at my place. That was the whole reason for my coming to this site in the first place. Because he became distant.
I think that may have been too slutty. 😳 Either way, lesson learned and I’m not kissing anyone or touching their leg on a first date anymore.
click to expand
LOL!
class="bqexpand"> Posted by STILL
Posted by Captivate86
I ask because a Capricorn buddy of mine from college recently told me, “ I can’t trust a woman who has sex with me on a first date. Especially oral sex. Surely I can’t be the first. And all I can think about is how many other guys she did that with, whilst telling them this is rare behavior and she’s just that attracted to them. Yeah, okay.”I think this is a pretty immature way to look at it, honestly. And why attack her value and credibility as a woman just because she shared physical intimacy with you? Anyway, I was curious if this was a shared belief with men.
Your Cap buddy is basing his opinion on the average woman who has sex on the date. His opinion is logical. click to expand
click to expand
his "down there parts" are dead.
@deadinside. lol
class="bqexpand"> Posted by lisabethur8
Posted by STILL
Posted by Captivate86
I ask because a Capricorn buddy of mine from college recently told me, “ I can’t trust a woman who has sex with me on a first date. Especially oral sex. Surely I can’t be the first. And all I can think about is how many other guys she did that with, whilst telling them this is rare behavior and she’s just that attracted to them. Yeah, okay.”I think this is a pretty immature way to look at it, honestly. And why attack her value and credibility as a woman just because she shared physical intimacy with you? Anyway, I was curious if this was a shared belief with men.
Your Cap buddy is basing his opinion on the average woman who has sex on the date. His opinion is logical. click to expand
his "down there parts" are dead.
@deadinside. lol click to expand
click to expand
Lol
I will add, if it matters, my husband was asking my Scorp lil sis about me for months. He never saw me. I didn't know our 1st date was "arranged" until we had been married 3 years.
So, what ever he was asking my Scorp sis met his criteria... and, societal didn't matter.
Posted by DeadInside
but still too easy i prob wont date her
probably cause you dont want her anyway.
but if you did, you'd keep wanting more. lol
then plan...plan.... for a home for you both so you can do more.
then as some men would say, Ohhhh nooooo..if only i used my brain more and not my heart.
Posted by meraki
Posted by Yodi
Posted by Soul
Yes.It was easy, effortless, and required nothing to achieve. So nothing is what she means to me.
Finally some honesty.. click to expand
What's the point of asking a question if you'll only accept one type of answer? y'all are funny
click to expand
*searching for the question I asked in this thread*
Damn i can't find it.. where I put it?
Help me understand wtf you mad about?
Play games? Am I missing something here?
Might I add that some people here seem like they’re carrying a lot of emotional and mental baggage and taking it out on unwitting strangers...
I asked a question because I was genuinely curious about how modern men view this situation and if it was similar to my Capricorn friend. Because I am single and will try to date again in a few months and want to be well-versed in the rules of engagement.
class="bqexpand"> Posted by DeadInside
Posted by lisabethur8
Posted by DeadInside
but still too easy i prob wont date her
probably cause you dont want her anyway.
but if you did, you'd keep wanting more. lol
then plan...plan.... for a home for you both so you can do more.
then as some men would say, Ohhhh nooooo..if only i used my brain more and not my heart. click to expand
honestly if she fits all the criteria i date her click to expand
click to expand
i dont thnk you'd even go far to allow her to let you "do you" unless you really want serious business. lol
you're too gentlemanly for that i'm sure. and set her straight and pour water on her passion for you.
lol@content
Posted by Captivate86
I ask because a Capricorn buddy of mine from college recently told me, “ I can’t trust a woman who has sex with me on a first date. Especially oral sex. Surely I can’t be the first. And all I can think about is how many other guys she did that with, whilst telling them this is rare behavior and she’s just that attracted to them. Yeah, okay.”I think this is a pretty immature way to look at it, honestly. And why attack her value and credibility as a woman just because she shared physical intimacy with you? Anyway, I was curious if this was a shared belief with men.
Betcha that same dude doesn’t feel his value is reduced by one night stands or getting his dick sucked on the first date. 🙄🙄🙄
The double standard is alive and well.
Personally I’m not interested in hyprocrites opinion. Holds 0 sway on how I live my life.
Posted by Captivate86
Play games? Am I missing something here?Might I add that some people here seem like they’re carrying a lot of emotional and mental baggage and taking it out on unwitting strangers...
I asked a question because I was genuinely curious about how modern men view this situation and if it was similar to my Capricorn friend. Because I am single and will try to date again in a few months and want to be well-versed in the rules of engagement.
When I was divorced, I wanted to know the "rules of engagement" too, having been married for 13 years at that time.
So, I read the "Diary of Casanova" all six volumes and footnotes.
One of many things I learned, and later experienced (although unintentional), is guys get angry horny the more beautiful they think you are plus the longer you make them wait... to the point that they'll stop talking to because you're a stuck up bitch that made them wait too long.
Thus, I decided to do what I feel... no regrets when I do what I want because I want to.
Posted by Arkansassy
Posted by Yodi
Posted by Soul
Yes.It was easy, effortless, and required nothing to achieve. So nothing is what she means to me.
Finally some honesty.. click to expand
Those that said "No" weren't being honest?
click to expand
If you want to fux on the 1st night then go. Idgaf just dont fux my man.
Soul was the first one to say he does care so I +1 him.. it seemed like an honest answer.. so 🤷🏿♀️
Maybe it came off wrong but I said what I said so shoot me.
Posted by Arkansassy
Posted by Captivate86
Play games? Am I missing something here?Might I add that some people here seem like they’re carrying a lot of emotional and mental baggage and taking it out on unwitting strangers...
I asked a question because I was genuinely curious about how modern men view this situation and if it was similar to my Capricorn friend. Because I am single and will try to date again in a few months and want to be well-versed in the rules of engagement.
Rules of engagement?
If there is chemistry on the first date and you want to have sex...
Then do it.
If a man judges you because of it, cut your losses as he's a judgmental asshole whom believes women can't enjoy sex without emotions.
That's the jist of it. Men think their so spectacular in bed that she'll be dickmatized after one date and want commitment.
It's nothing but projection.
Enjoy yourself. Enjoy your body and the pleasures it offers. Just be safe about it and most importantly.. Have fun.
Jfc
click to expand
YEEEEEEEESSSSS!!!!!
LIKE
LIKE
LIKE
LIKE
Posted by Captivate86
Play games? Am I missing something here?Might I add that some people here seem like they’re carrying a lot of emotional and mental baggage and taking it out on unwitting strangers...
I asked a question because I was genuinely curious about how modern men view this situation and if it was similar to my Capricorn friend. Because I am single and will try to date again in a few months and want to be well-versed in the rules of engagement.
The kind of “modern man” who objectifies women’s worth as what’s between their legs and not their ears while, of course, engaging in the same behavior...isn’t someone you want in your life anyways.
When dating, all you need to do is pre-qualify the man for yourself. Know what he’s about. If you have an amazing date and click and feel safe why shouldn’t you see if the sexual chemistry is there? Live your truth.
class="bqexpand"> Posted by LadyNeptune
Posted by Captivate86
I ask because a Capricorn buddy of mine from college recently told me, “ I can’t trust a woman who has sex with me on a first date. Especially oral sex. Surely I can’t be the first. And all I can think about is how many other guys she did that with, whilst telling them this is rare behavior and she’s just that attracted to them. Yeah, okay.”I think this is a pretty immature way to look at it, honestly. And why attack her value and credibility as a woman just because she shared physical intimacy with you? Anyway, I was curious if this was a shared belief with men.
Betcha that same dude doesn’t feel his value is reduced by one night stands or getting his dick sucked on the first date. 🙄🙄🙄
The double standard is alive and well.
Personally I’m not interested in hyprocrites opinion. Holds 0 sway on how I live my life. click to expand
click to expand
You hit the nail on the head. He’s known for being a cad.
So, I asked him, “If the thought of a woman having sex with you on a first date, to include oral, is so off-putting, then that means you didn’t let her, right?” His response was, “I’m a guy. Of course I let her. She just can’t expect for me to respect her or see her seriously.”
Then I asked him, “What if she performed really well and gave you an experience unlike any other? Would that make you reconsider?”
He said: “Hell no. She didn’t get that good by having a natural talent for it. She had to practice. How much practice? I don’t even want to know.”
I explained to him that I’ve been considered an amazing lover by the people I’ve been with, which aren’t many. That my sexuality is actually very natural, but technique, I learned it from porn.(Please don’t judge me) Infused with my own imagination, of course.
He said that would be an exception, but that he thinks that would be rare. I don’t agree. I think there are probably a lot of women like me.
Posted by Captivate86
Since we are all afforded anonymity on here, I want to ask something in hopes that men will be completely honest in their answer.My question is: Does a woman’s sleeping with you(having sex with you) on the first date affect how you see her as a person?
If I'm even dating a woman, like legitimately, I don't mind having sex on the first date, because the fact that I consider it a date means I truly want to be intimate and close with that person, know them on all levels. Not going to think they're a sluttyMcTootsie if they sleep with me after the first date. Also, If i'm dating the person, and I keep getting a vibe that they arn't into it like I am. Like it's just another tally on their chalkboard, I turn off, don't care to talk to them. Twice that's happen, and these women even tried to bring it back into their ballcourt by trying for oral, but I stopped them. Weirdly enough, that butter made them really into me after that. Constantly texting me days later, and I wanted nothing to do with them, so it just comes down to a vibe I get. If i feel you give a damn about knowing me, are considerate of my emotions, then I have no problem with sex on the first date. If I'm just some game, then i do NOT give a flailing 4uck how hot you are, you're not getting my peener
I'ma just stay away from this one..
But no. If you are only interested in her outside of commitment, then why the fuck does it matter?
She can go and fuck 3 more people for all of the shit I give.
If you have no fucking game and you trynna lock her down, then THAT'S when you worry.. And that worry and neediness is gonna make her leave your ass, whether she was a hoe or not.. But, BOY.. Especially if she is a hoe.
A woman knows whether she would fuck you or not after the first 30 seconds of meeting you. After 30 seconds, you'll never fuck.
Women are aroused by the right mothafucka with the right vibes, they can't help themselves.. It's just as natural as men's urge to cheat.
I have fucked many girls on first dates. I have even dated them short-term.. Cuz my game was good and decent. I didn't worry about her being a whore. I know she's a whore anyway, but I know how to fuck and keep it tight.. So it's ALLL GOODD..
Everybody's a hoe.
I just don't agree with cheating, lying ass bitches.
Posted by Taniwha
If she takes a long time to sleep with you it tells you that she is considering the relationship more seriously, shes investing in her emotional needs first, rather than just the physical. That tells me that shes got an emotional interest in me and is interested in more than just sex. If she's sleeping with me on the first date its most likely because she knows that she wont be effected by it if things go sour and I split, it says she doesn't care what I think of her. If she wont sleep with me it says shes concerned with what I think of her, It says that shes worried that If I don't call her back afterwards that she is going to feel hurt. It tells me that she is willing to invest time and energy into a relationship with me. Her not sleeping with me straight away makes me feel important to her.
Man, I'm reading this again... knowing my experiences and I'm trying so hard not to cry bullshit. Damn, I did it.
I don't do emotional investment when dating. And, guys that tried to get "emotional investment" from me too soon, I suspected of "running game." 9x's outta ten, I was right. "Emotional investment" often equaled vulnerability to manipulation.... the string a bitch along kings.
I could tell some stories... LMAO.
I'm just not built like that. Either you want me or you don't...period.
Posted by meraki
Posted by Yodi
Posted by meraki
Posted by Yodi
Posted by Soul
Yes.It was easy, effortless, and required nothing to achieve. So nothing is what she means to me.
Finally some honesty.. click to expand
What's the point of asking a question if you'll only accept one type of answer? y'all are funny
*searching for the question I asked in this thread*
Damn i can't find it.. where I put it?
Help me understand wtf you mad about? click to expand
Neither of us is mad lol. (I hope)
but unless you're being petty, you know what I'm talkin about
it's obvious you're giving credit for honesty not because it's truly honest but because it's the answer you're looking for. lol
It's BS and some of y'all are on the same tip.
No shade tho. I'm just bein honest.
click to expand
All shade but it's cool bruh bruh we good 🤣
His answer was honest to some just like yours was honest to others so who wins?
Ps: idk about you but I'm feeling hella childish today 🤣😋 no hard feelings.
Posted by Captivate86
Posted by LadyNeptune
Posted by Captivate86
I ask because a Capricorn buddy of mine from college recently told me, “ I can’t trust a woman who has sex with me on a first date. Especially oral sex. Surely I can’t be the first. And all I can think about is how many other guys she did that with, whilst telling them this is rare behavior and she’s just that attracted to them. Yeah, okay.”I think this is a pretty immature way to look at it, honestly. And why attack her value and credibility as a woman just because she shared physical intimacy with you? Anyway, I was curious if this was a shared belief with men.
Betcha that same dude doesn’t feel his value is reduced by one night stands or getting his dick sucked on the first date. 🙄🙄🙄
The double standard is alive and well.
Personally I’m not interested in hyprocrites opinion. Holds 0 sway on how I live my life. click to expand
You hit the nail on the head. He’s known for being a cad.
So, I asked him, “If the thought of a woman having sex with you on a first date, to include oral, is so off-putting, then that means you didn’t let her, right?” His response was, “I’m a guy. Of course I let her. She just can’t expect for me to respect her or see her seriously.”
Then I asked him, “What if she performed really well and gave you an experience unlike any other? Would that make you reconsider?”
He said: “Hell no. She didn’t get that good by having a natural talent for it. She had to practice. How much practice? I don’t even want to know.”
I explained to him that I’ve been considered an amazing lover by the people I’ve been with, which aren’t many. That my sexuality is actually very natural, but technique, I learned it from porn.(Please don’t judge me) Infused with my own imagination, of course.
He said that would be an exception, but that he thinks that would be rare. I don’t agree. I think there are probably a lot of women like me.
click to expand
Grrrrrrrrrr... he deserves an 8 year dry spell.
Posted by CaptainCap
Plus, coming from a non-religious perspective, I just logically don't think it makes sense to start a relationship off of sex. We do it anyway, obviously, but still it would be better to really get to know each other I guess
I like people. So, sometimes I want a naked hug but, that's just too weird and I'd look like a tease. So, I'd just have them spend the night.
Posted by meraki
Issa damn shame other dudes ruin it for the rest of us. nowadays it's so hard to be authentic cause 1, it makes you vulnerable, 2 everyone and their mama has trust issues. lmaoo
Clap, clap, clap.
No conformity... everyone should be themselves... if they know who they are.
Posted by meraki
Issa damn shame other dudes ruin it for the rest of us. nowadays it's so hard to be authentic cause 1, it makes you vulnerable, 2 everyone and their mama has trust issues. lmaoo
A very true statement. And I think the same could be said for women.
I don’t tout my sexuality as a tool for manipulation. I think because some men have been burned that way, they think all women who are sexual have an ulterior motive.
It sucks, but the only way we can start the shift is by being more open with communication and being ourselves.
So, my fellow single people, have dialogues. Open and honest dialogues.
Posted by Captivate86
Posted by meraki
Issa damn shame other dudes ruin it for the rest of us. nowadays it's so hard to be authentic cause 1, it makes you vulnerable, 2 everyone and their mama has trust issues. lmaoo
A very true statement. And I think the same could be said for women.
I don’t tout my sexuality as a tool for manipulation. I think because some men have been burned that way, they think all women who are sexual have an ulterior motive.
It sucks, but the only way we can start the shift is by being more open with communication and being ourselves.
So, my fellow single people, have dialogues. Open and honest dialogues.
click to expand
I'm glad you created this topic. It may be an end to the website's "Help [Insert Sign]..." topics.
class="bqexpand"> Posted by VenusAquarius
Posted by Captivate86
Posted by meraki
Issa damn shame other dudes ruin it for the rest of us. nowadays it's so hard to be authentic cause 1, it makes you vulnerable, 2 everyone and their mama has trust issues. lmaoo
A very true statement. And I think the same could be said for women.
I don’t tout my sexuality as a tool for manipulation. I think because some men have been burned that way, they think all women who are sexual have an ulterior motive.
It sucks, but the only way we can start the shift is by being more open with communication and being ourselves.
So, my fellow single people, have dialogues. Open and honest dialogues.
I'm glad you created this topic. It may be an end to the website's "Help [Insert Sign]..." topics.
click to expand
click to expand
Thank you! I’m glad I did too...I’ve really gained a lot from it so far. I’m at this place in my life where I want to challenge core beliefs and truly be open to learning about other perspectives.
I love hearing what other people have learned from their life experiences.
Posted by Captivate86
Posted by VenusAquarius
Posted by Captivate86
Posted by meraki
Issa damn shame other dudes ruin it for the rest of us. nowadays it's so hard to be authentic cause 1, it makes you vulnerable, 2 everyone and their mama has trust issues. lmaoo
A very true statement. And I think the same could be said for women.
I don’t tout my sexuality as a tool for manipulation. I think because some men have been burned that way, they think all women who are sexual have an ulterior motive.
It sucks, but the only way we can start the shift is by being more open with communication and being ourselves.
So, my fellow single people, have dialogues. Open and honest dialogues.
I'm glad you created this topic. It may be an end to the website's "Help [Insert Sign]..." topics.
click to expand
Thank you! I’m glad I did too...I’ve really gained a lot from it so far. I’m at this place in my life where I want to challenge core beliefs and truly be open to learning about other perspectives.
I love hearing what other people have learned from their life experiences.
click to expand
Don't count us married (or divorced women) out. We could tell some stories... I try not to TMI but, geez. This site needs to get real.
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Since we are all afforded anonymity on here, I want to ask something in hopes that men will be completely honest in their answer.
My question is: Does a woman’s sleeping with you(having sex with you) on the first date affect how you see her as a person?