"Let's be friends"

Seems like there are some interesting ideas on this. So here's a question. When you've heard "Let's be friends" from someone you were interested in, what was your response? What did you say and/or do at that point?

For those of you who've said it to someone who was interested in you (or who you were interested in), what were the circumstances? What outcome were you hoping for afterward?

still better than "i only see you as my brother"

And relationship has to have a foundation. That foundation is formed by friendship.

it means you are friendzoned

If it means I'm friend zoned - that's a no from me. 😆

Well only time I have heard this was with a slow moving crab. I know he still has feelings but he is scared and cautious... I think there is still a chance down the road but we stay friends now.

Now...Ain't that the question...!

😆

You're friendzoned if I say it, pretty much means it will always stay that way.

Posted by WonderWoman14
You're friendzoned if I say it, pretty much means it will always stay that way.

Same.

If I say it, it means I'm not romantically interested in you at all. In the past, I've used it with the intention of keeping things platonic, only to realize that those who agreed to stick around always ended up secretly wanting more. It wasn't healthy for either of us, so I eventually had to cut them loose.

Nowadays, I try to avoid using that line at all. I just apologize, tell them I don't think we're a good fit, and wish them the best. Sucks, because a lot of times, I genuinely do like the person, but what can you do.

When I said this once to a girl that I actually eventually dated it meant I wasn't ready.

When I've said it to guys in the past ...it meant I was gay and there was no shot.haha

But I really want to be their friend because of shared interests and so I could have someone to talk to girls about.

In all of the scenarios mentioned above.....the "let's be friends" thing eventually blew up in my face.

Posted by Chuckcem
Seems like there are some interesting ideas on this. So here's a question. When you've heard "Let's be friends" from someone you were interested in, what was your response? What did you say and/or do at that point?

For those of you who've said it to someone who was interested in you (or who you were interested in), what were the circumstances? What outcome were you hoping for afterward?

When I've heard I want us to be friends I said first of all we ARE friends!

So are you asking about sex?

And what threw me off the balance - he said yes, I am talking about sex.

Since then I know he never lying to me!

So I said I am not screwing you in your office! And of course I did...—?

If I like them beyond wanting to phukck - then of course I'd be fine with just being friends.

I have enough friends. Good luck with your life?

Posted by LadyNeptune
I have enough friends. Good luck with your life?

That's my response if I hear that as well. The last woman who said that got the following response from me, "I don't think you have it in you to actually be my friend. My friends are pretty hardcore. I don't do the friend thing either because it would be a lie on my part. I'm not going to pretend as if that is what I want. If you change your mind, let me know."

If I say let's be friends, that's either my way of letting a woman down gently or because there's a clear conflict of interest where a romantic relationship simply isn't possible. Either way I'm aware that saying "Let's be friends" won't result in an actual friendship.

Posted by Chuckcem

Posted by LadyNeptune
I have enough friends. Good luck with your life?

That's my response if I hear that as well. The last woman who said that got the following response from me, "I don't think you have it in you to actually be my friend. My friends are pretty hardcore. I don't do the friend thing either because it would be a lie on my part. I'm not going to pretend as if that is what I want. If you change your mind, let me know."

If I say let's be friends, that's either my way of letting a woman down gently or because there's a clear conflict of interest where a romantic relationship simply isn't possible. Either way I'm aware that saying "Let's be friends" won't result in an actual friendship.

click to expand

I don't believe men and women can be friends after dating UNLESS there was a preexisting friendship or there is an interest you both share, something you bond over and a reason to continue to hang out. Otherwise it's just something people patronizingly say to soften the blow.

Posted by LadyNeptune

Posted by Chuckcem

Posted by LadyNeptune
I have enough friends. Good luck with your life?

That's my response if I hear that as well. The last woman who said that got the following response from me, "I don't think you have it in you to actually be my friend. My friends are pretty hardcore. I don't do the friend thing either because it would be a lie on my part. I'm not going to pretend as if that is what I want. If you change your mind, let me know."

If I say let's be friends, that's either my way of letting a woman down gently or because there's a clear conflict of interest where a romantic relationship simply isn't possible. Either way I'm aware that saying "Let's be friends" won't result in an actual friendship.

I don't believe men and women can be friends after dating UNLESS there was a preexisting friendship or there is an interest you both share, something you bond over and a reason to continue to hang out. Otherwise it's just something people patronizingly say to soften the blow.

click to expand

Yep, same.