Gonna ask my male scorp to marry me........... (Page 2)

"at this point, i think the scorpion's intuition has surpassed the fish's."

LOL Duly noted.

"from where I view the world, help, real help = truth about the self."

Agreed. It's that shadow side that is tough to face. I struggle with it too...but not to the point of denying that it's there. That's pointless. How would you ever learn anything?

This is simply a case of a person who knows herself not ... and as with all people who aren't self-aware .. the only recourse is to look outside of the self as a reason for the course of life.

is it just me or is this totally boring? can't we have an argument or something to spice things up? all this pontificating on the institution of marriage is making me nauseous.

my top tip is to plan for the divorce well ahead of the wedding ceremony. marry wisely. think of it as a pension plan. it is a contract after all and all contracts have smallprint, so make sure you have your terms listed in no uncertain terms but illegibly small.

whenever he pisses you off you can threaten him with breach of contract and eventually he will become weak and either allow you to control him or fuck off.

win/win

amen

Control is the preference, to be sure.

What other purpose is there in a marriage, anyway, besides insurance benefits?

Afterall, a piece of legal docuement doesn't make a partnership .. two people in unison/harmony make a partnership.

A piece of paper, filed at the courthouse, as it pertains to it's importance in a union is equivelant to .... the need to shave butt hairs to put on a pair of shoes.

"and they need to really slow down and talk."

You mean by texting each other, right? Not that old-fashioned, in-person way...where they can see each other's expressions and such...

🙂

What are you, some sort of luddite?

"What are you, some sort of luddite?"

When it comes to conducting an entire relationship without physical or in-person contact...yes. 😛

"It just sounds to me like a lot of assumptions are being made between the two of them in this relationship, and they need to really slow down and talk."

Well, we can't say that for him, because he doesn't have a voice here ... what he thinks, or says .. has been interpreted by a second party within this other person's perspective of what it might mean.

In reality .. we cannot address the Scorpio man's intentions, because he isn't here to testify for himself. We can only address ariesfire and her intentions and deeds because she is here to speak for herself.

"I'm still bent over holding the pole for you waiting for your next move."

Yes, well I'm trying to figure out what exactly that's going to be since you gave me all those rules and regulations. 😛

"Sounds to me more like they use telepathy than actual talking."

Which comes in handy 😉

But, you're right .. it does sound this way.

I get the feeling that what is present is close to the fantasy I had when I was like 12 years old.

A man would come rescue me, from me, and in so doing, he would love me unconditionally, no matter what I did or said, no matter how I treated him, and he would have eyes only for me, because once rescued from me, I would then be the only other female live on the planet ...... and the only thing he would talk about in his sleep would be a green strawberry on a stack of negligent bird houses that used up all their fingernails to say they were feeling a person who showed the strawberry how to change the color of it's loftiness while flying under water.

Here's the bottom line ...

A relationship that is "open" in any form, is without terms and conditions (and yes, a successful partnership HAS to have terms and conditions) .... and any relationship that is "open" is NOT marriage material.

Absolutely true, P. It's pretty sad you had to define it, though...

*colossal DUUUUUUURRRR*

wait...

are you actually considering proposing to your guy?

fuckina: i don't want to start a topic on my dramas as that would be self indulgent and there is quite enough of that on these boards as it is. so i'm pissed off with the topic of marriage - i have a right to that opinion, do i not?

it is on topic. it is my opinion based upon my experience. pardon me for fucking breathing.

aries/scorpio is a disaster whatever way around the genders are. on the rare occasions that it is not a disaster, it is the most awesome coupling imaginable. all the best things in life are the hardest to achieve and this is true in this situation also. marriage IS a contract and does require WORK to make it happen. it's not all hearts and flowers in the real world. the stats speak for themselves. i don't know about the US but in europe, 1 in 3 marriages end in divorce. you have to think long and hard before making the commitment - on ALL levels, otherwise it's not a realistic proposition.

This has been quite interesting. Thanks all.

I surely must have been delusional to think that my man calling me another woman's name right after sex was any cause for alarm whatsover. I will apologize to him immediately and beg for forgiveness at my stupidity. In fact, maybe calling eachother different names
from time to time will spice things up!

That is the trouble with being the baby of the zodiac. So much to learn!

"Marriage, in my mind, means unconditional love and trust."

"we were in a social situation earlier in the evening where the girl was there and they really seemed to have a connection."

No, this is not contradictory. I simply noticed this connection. Did not get upset or think anything, merely "noticed" it.

Really, when it comes down to it marriage is WAY MORE then just the sex act. Thus, if either one of us is interested in the sport with someone else briefly then it was decided we would talk about it first. Nothing has happened yet, and nothing likely will anytime soon (at least on my side).

You are right, marriage does have conditions. Ours would be if ya wanna mess around, the condition is you use safe sex and you tell me about it first. Easy yes?

Thanks all for the input. Was confused more than anything about this.

"You are right, marriage does have conditions. Ours would be if ya wanna mess around, the condition is you use safe sex and you tell me about it first. Easy yes?"

I just don't get you, at all ....

If a condition of marriage would be .. he can mess around with another woman so long as the sex is safe, and he communicates this desire to you .. then why make a scene, to go sleep on the sofa, if speaks another woman's name?

You make absolutely no sense to me .. I can't rationalize any of it.

But, whatever ....... it's your life.

p-angel: i would have thought that by now you knew that dxp is no place for the rational. and if it doesn't make sense to you then the rest of us have no chance 🙂

If a condition of marriage would be .. he can mess around with another woman so long as the sex is safe, and he communicates this desire to you .. then why make a scene, to go sleep on the sofa, if speaks another woman's name?"

Because it was the first time that ever happened to me, with anyone, and was very confused by it since he told me he did not like that woman whatsover. Thus, I had a fleeting moment of wondering if our trust in eachother was a facade. Hey, we all get cold feet right?

Maybe I am just a nutcase. Oh well. I like me ;}

Ro .. I guess I haven't learnt my lesson yet, and still attempt to make sense out of everything. *** cursed ***

sorry FA, my expression may have been a touch rude but i am 'menstrually challenged' today.

no. i'm not too old LOL.

He was asleep .... my gawd.

Is everybody, except me, this unreasonable?

No wonder I have problems co-existing with other people.

"P. it is not unreasonable actually. that was my point in my first post. sometimes i can get mad at something reasonable you know for whatever reason that i can careless when i was mad lol."

The thing is, SG .... for a person to get upset, or mad over something like this is not unreasonable, for our feelings are worthy of value, and they are in place for a reason. However, with a situation like this one for example .. these feelings are NOT the responsibility of another person, and to project them on this other person is the unreasonable part.

You know me .. I am very much adamant on drilling into people's heads that they ARE responsible for their actions, their words, their intentions .... however, this is to say, when they are in control.

There are times in life where people do not have control over themselves, or control over a situation .... and sleep is one of this situations. We cannot help what we do, or say in our sleep .. absolutely no control whatsoever.

And it's quite possible that this is the case .... it has been said that this relationship is open to messing around with other people so long a sexual protection is in place, it has also been conveyed that talking to other women in a social setting is grounds to get upset .... so, there is no real definition here.

It would seem plausible that "playing" with emotions would be present in an ambiguously tempered relationship with intentions of getting the other to clarify positioning.

wtf?