Are you comfortable being groped in your relationship? (Page 2)

Hell's yeah. Mark your territory.

Just not in front of my dad

Posted by PhoenixStorm

Posted by sweetpea2977

Posted by Antiphates

Is it something you dislike in itself or is the amount and frequency that you don't like?

This is so new for me. I've never been in a relationship where a man is just touching me, rubbing me every time he passes or lays next to me to cuddle or take a nap. Everything isn't sexual. True intimacy goes beyond the sexual. So for me, I don't like it randomly done to me. The frequency or amount. We've been dating for 9 months. He's now starting this shit. He has begun complimenting me a lot too. I don't care for that either. When he said that I've changed, I told him that he has. Wondering if lust is beginning to outweigh the love.

I don’t think it’s a matter of lust outweighing the love.

Words of affirmation and physical touch are probably just how he expresses himself. You guys should google the 5 love languages and take the quiz to see where you both stand and to see how you each need to be loved or need to express your love.

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Thank you. Yes, good insight.

He's not much of a talker, as he is a listener, but physical touch is definitely one. He gives a lot of gifts and does acts of service for me. Very giving.

Mine are physical touch, quality time and tied: words of affirmation w acts of service. For me though, it's not words of affirmation in the physical form (ie my appearance/looking good). It's more so, words that show appreciation. More abstract than concrete.

Posted by LittleStar

His love language is probably physical touch.

But if you’ve had a legitimate conversation about it and he doesn’t change then I’d consider that a lack of respect.

I am not fond of that however especially when I experience PTSD.

I would probably be completely turned off and leave.

Absolutely.

Moving forward I'm quite sure he won't be doing that again. It's caused a major ripple.

Posted by Phantum

Posted by tiziani

Posted by Phantum

Posted by tiziani

Boom.

#truegrit romance prevails.

Or bullshit does.

They both defused the stand off and reaffirmed they want to spend time together.

Can't ask for more than that when both were hurt.

She got an awfully conveniently timed update to win her argument. Neato.

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I was motivated by Saggurl to reach out one mo' time. I wasn't wrong in how I felt. That's valid. I was wrong in how I reacted to it; the words I used, my tone, my dismissive mannerism. Love humbles us. I admitted my wrong. He's accepting of that.

So why call possible bullshit and "awful convenience"? Let me find out you mad about reconciliation. LMAO.

Posted by tiziani

Posted by Phantum

Posted by tiziani

Boom.

#truegrit romance prevails.

Or bullshit does.

They both defused the stand off and reaffirmed they want to spend time together.

Can't ask for more than that when both were hurt.

click to expand

Indeed. I like the way that you see things 🙂

Posted by Phantum

Posted by sweetpea2977

Posted by Phantum

Posted by tiziani

Posted by Phantum

Posted by tiziani

Boom.

#truegrit romance prevails.

Or bullshit does.

They both defused the stand off and reaffirmed they want to spend time together.

Can't ask for more than that when both were hurt.

She got an awfully conveniently timed update to win her argument. Neato.

I was motivated by Saggurl to reach out one mo' time. I wasn't wrong in how I felt. That's valid. I was wrong in how I reacted to it; the words I used, my tone, my dismissive mannerism. Love humbles us. I admitted my wrong. He's accepting of that.

So why call possible bullshit and "awful convenience"? Let me find out you mad about reconciliation. LMAO.

Let's just agree to disagree about whether you're full of shit.

click to expand

LMAO!!! #birdBYE!

Posted by tiziani

Posted by sweetpea2977

Posted by tiziani

Posted by Phantum

Posted by tiziani

Boom.

#truegrit romance prevails.

Or bullshit does.

They both defused the stand off and reaffirmed they want to spend time together.

Can't ask for more than that when both were hurt.

Indeed. I like the way that you see things 🙂

It's easier for me to see it from the outside, but I can't deny if I'd been personally involved in it myself my reaction wouldn't have been that mature. At least not in the past. At best, like him, I wouldn't have known what to say.

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I understand. I'm not upset by the way he distanced himself. Hurt does that.

The way I handled this was an accumulation of things I didn't care for last week (in genera). This particular issue is what broke the camels back so to speak.

Posted by alexscaries

Posted by sweetpea2977

Posted by Antiphates

Is it something you dislike in itself or is the amount and frequency that you don't like?

This is so new for me. I've never been in a relationship where a man is just touching me, rubbing me every time he passes or lays next to me to cuddle or take a nap. Everything isn't sexual. True intimacy goes beyond the sexual. So for me, I don't like it randomly done to me. The frequency or amount. We've been dating for 9 months. He's now starting this shit. He has begun complimenting me a lot too. I don't care for that either. When he said that I've changed, I told him that he has. Wondering if lust is beginning to outweigh the love.

A lot of compliments could mean insecurity were he is scared to lose you.

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I'm sure he doesn't want to lose me. He always makes me feel wanted and loved. Insecure? I haven't witnessed insecurity in him yet. But if I compliment him, he'll shy away from it.

I grope in private only.

Give him a taste of his own medicine. Wape him at night during the middle of his sleep.

Posted by sagaciouscorp

Posted by sweetpea2977

Posted by saggurl88

Posted by sweetpea2977

Posted by saggurl88

Posted by sweetpea2977

Posted by Phantum

Posted by sweetpea2977

Posted by Phantum

Oy.

I like to be touched by my husband. I would hate for him to have to ask permission to touch my butt or something. When he does it in public it's usually sly and like a little secret between us. He always stops if I don't want him to do it.

It's good that he's willing to stop if you're not wanting that kind of attention. That's respectful 🙂

Does your partner not stop when you ask?

If you don't like for cuddling or other touching to lead to sex, how do you guys get to sex?

I haven't asked him to stop but there have been times when I'll lay down to cuddle and relax and he'll ask me why I haven't removed my bra. That's my answer at times. He's been putting a lot of focus on my breasts and my face/hair for about 3 weeks now.

He and I will make love by kissing usually. But! There are many, many times, we kiss and cuddle without getting into sex or being naked. One of my love languages is affection, but because I'm sapio it's different for me.

You should have a talk with him. Him caressing your hair or face is a usual sign of a man in love. He is probably aware that for women to be completely relaxed, they usually take off their bra.

I’m not familiar with what sapio is, but if you think this is crossing boundaries that you have in place, then it will cause issues in your relationship.

Both men and women want to feel wanted. He’s doing it his way, while showing you affection but it’s not being received well by you.

So just have a talk with him, maybe keep the harsh sexual assault stuff to a limit though. 🙂

I never mentioned sexual assault to him. I simply explained that I noticed his attention to my breasts, and that it feels like groping, and it wasn't necessary. He caresses my face, hair, hands, feet, back, every damn place lol Very loving and sensual. But I don't want to be caught off guard because you can't keep your hands off my breast for a day. This man has given me orgasms just through a kiss to my lips or my breasts. As good as that feels, I still don't want my breasts touched every day. Just as I wouldn't walk up to him and grab his penis/scrotum or ass everyday. It's just not who I am. He's been showing great affection since we fell in love. Not sure why talking w him about this has him feeling like I've rejected him. It's crazy. I'm done talking. He knows how much I love him and how my body responds to him but even with all the passion I have for him, I respect his body.

Maybe he will come around. He has to come with grips that you don’t like what he’s doing on a consistent basis. It will just take open communication and compromise which you have started. As you can see, since you googled/researched it, it’s a pretty common thing in a relationship.

His feelings are just hurt right now. He’ll get over it.

Yes, he's hurt. So am I. But I won't force myself on him. Not sure he'll get over it. I'm already making peace with the fact that he may not.

Human nature is to show what we want. He might be thirsty of affection himself why he over does it n keeps saying you have changed.

Do you carees his face n hair? Hug him unexpectedly?

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"He might be thirsty of affection himself..." I didn't think of it this way. Thank you. He loves my touch, yes. I caress his face, run my hands through his hair, kiss his cheeks and neck etc He's very lovable so yes, I give as much as I receive 🙂

Posted by SassyKiwi

Give him a taste of his own medicine. Wape him at night during the middle of his sleep.

I believe that moving forward he'll never do this again lol It can't be in that manner anyway.

Posted by Jade_Alexander

My body first and foremost

My ex husband would do this and it would annoy me because I had express the discomfort physically and emotionally.

I like being touched, there are many ways to express affection physically. But if touching my tits and smacking my ass becomes the way youre expressing affection I feel used.

And there is no excuse ignoring or downplaying your partners boundaries. Thats a huge red flag

Absolutely! That's really the bottom line.

I love being touched. Doesn't bother me. In front of family is where I draw the line

Posted by SagInTheSun898

I love being touched. Doesn't bother me. In front of family is where I draw the line

Show me your boobs.

Posted by SlipperySlope

You should give him a ticket that has 10 gropes per day or whatever your limit is and if he over does it then he gets no gropes tomorrow.

You should allow a random stranger from your neighborhood to grope your testicles 15x per day and if you're not a satisfied customer, discontinue the service.

Posted by SagInTheSun898

I love being touched. Doesn't bother me. In front of family is where I draw the line

Same, I'm innocent in front of my family

Otherwise touch me, tease me

🙂

Posted by ELIGAB

Posted by SagInTheSun898

I love being touched. Doesn't bother me. In front of family is where I draw the line

Same, I'm innocent in front of my family

Otherwise touch me, tease me

🙂

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Yes, exactly

Posted by SlipperySlope

Posted by sweetpea2977

Posted by SlipperySlope

You should give him a ticket that has 10 gropes per day or whatever your limit is and if he over does it then he gets no gropes tomorrow.

You should allow a random stranger from your neighborhood to grope your testicles 15x per day and if you're not a satisfied customer, discontinue the service.

Wwaaat?

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I gave you a reflection of the response you gave. Neither made sense. Exactly the point.

Posted by alexscaries

Posted by sweetpea2977

Posted by alexscaries

Posted by sweetpea2977

Posted by Antiphates

Is it something you dislike in itself or is the amount and frequency that you don't like?

This is so new for me. I've never been in a relationship where a man is just touching me, rubbing me every time he passes or lays next to me to cuddle or take a nap. Everything isn't sexual. True intimacy goes beyond the sexual. So for me, I don't like it randomly done to me. The frequency or amount. We've been dating for 9 months. He's now starting this shit. He has begun complimenting me a lot too. I don't care for that either. When he said that I've changed, I told him that he has. Wondering if lust is beginning to outweigh the love.

A lot of compliments could mean insecurity were he is scared to lose you.

I'm sure he doesn't want to lose me. He always makes me feel wanted and loved. Insecure? I haven't witnessed insecurity in him yet. But if I compliment him, he'll shy away from it.

If he shys away from it maybe he doesn't believe it. Some people can't see what others see as they have inner thoughts and personal demons to deal with. I've seen it in women were they will throw out a lot of compliments early on in a relationship, to keep a man (possibly from cheating or getting bored?). I don't know the psychology behind it, but a barrage of compliments isn't normal even if someone thinks you are the badger's nadgers.

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Yes, it's definitely possible. He's a beautiful guy. Unsure as to whether he's received compliments like that throughout his life. He has beautiful eyes and hands and I'll compliment that too. It seems he just wants to give the compliments, but it's cute how he reacts when I say it.

Posted by LittleStar

Posted by sweetpea2977

Posted by LittleStar

His love language is probably physical touch.

But if you’ve had a legitimate conversation about it and he doesn’t change then I’d consider that a lack of respect.

I am not fond of that however especially when I experience PTSD.

I would probably be completely turned off and leave.

Absolutely.

Moving forward I'm quite sure he won't be doing that again. It's caused a major ripple.

Yeah I mean I get both sides and this has been an issue in the past for me.

You have to make sure both sides are getting needs met.

So maybe give him places you are comfortable being touched or grabbed (shoulder, waist, knee, etc) so if he does want to be affectionate he still has an outlet.

I used to go off the deep end for things like that without bothering to understand where they were coming from and I think it’s good to make sure they also feel loved.

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In agreement 🙂 He's definitely, definitely loved by me. I'm attentive to him. He's my teddy bear. Plenty of squeezing, kissing, holding, intimacy. He's not lacking. What I think has happened is that he really likes my breasts (he says they're his) and I'm sure that his attention to them has grown as his love for me has. He's a loving and affectionate man. We make each other happy. For sure. It's just that when that hand constantly touches my breast when we're not even taking it to the next level. You know? Just being relaxed and free and then he cops the feels. Umm....no. Not now.

Posted by SlipperySlope

Posted by sweetpea2977

Posted by SlipperySlope

Posted by sweetpea2977

Posted by SlipperySlope

You should give him a ticket that has 10 gropes per day or whatever your limit is and if he over does it then he gets no gropes tomorrow.

You should allow a random stranger from your neighborhood to grope your testicles 15x per day and if you're not a satisfied customer, discontinue the service.

Wwaaat?

I gave you a reflection of the response you gave. Neither made sense. Exactly the point.

No. Mine makes perfect sense.

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Not to me it doesn't. He's not getting a fucking ticket for something I don't want him doing on the regular. How the hell did you miss that point? Try again.

Posted by SlipperySlope

Posted by sweetpea2977

Posted by SlipperySlope

Posted by sweetpea2977

Posted by SlipperySlope

Posted by sweetpea2977

Posted by SlipperySlope

You should give him a ticket that has 10 gropes per day or whatever your limit is and if he over does it then he gets no gropes tomorrow.

You should allow a random stranger from your neighborhood to grope your testicles 15x per day and if you're not a satisfied customer, discontinue the service.

Wwaaat?

I gave you a reflection of the response you gave. Neither made sense. Exactly the point.

No. Mine makes perfect sense.

Not to me it doesn't. He's not getting a fucking ticket for something I don't want him doing on the regular. How the hell did you miss that point? Try again.

I didn't, it's a joke.

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I really thought you were being a prick. I apologize.

Posted by Raakac

I wouldn't mind with the person that i like and i'm in relationship with. Public place also, but should be quick and fun, like playing a game, not passionate.

I remember one day my female friend touched my abs and arms thru the shirt and said let me see that and touch that , i said i don't like that and i won't do that, but she didn't understand and kept coming, she said sorry the next day but regardless she tried again, she tried joking thru the chat about touching my abs, and i made a statement if you ever touch my abs like that without me touching we are over, she got insulted and our relationship kinda stoped. I'm not mad at her because she said she's sorry, but if she's not going to respect the thing that i don't like this thing, the relationship isn't going to work. for me it's just not the thing that opposite sex friends do . I mean it's fun and games sometimes to do funny shit, but this wasn't fun for me and i expressed that i don't like, i'm not a sculpture that anyone can just come and start poking and undressing, she didn't seem to care and kept coming . I mean have respect for other people, just because i like doing something doesn't mean other people do, and if they express that i always respect that and expect same in return, if she couldn't understand that even tho i clearly expressed myself and she went for it i didn't know what else to do, seems like a stupid way to end friendship, but at the end of the day if she can't understand that i don't like this and it's way more important for her to touch my abs and see my abs and touch my chest etc rather than respect my wishes. I mean i wouldn't go hey let me touch your tits or ass or our friendship is over, that's stupid and disrespectful.

Exactly! And I'm glad that you pointed out that women are guilty of this too.

Posted by SlipperySlope

Posted by sweetpea2977

Posted by SlipperySlope

Posted by sweetpea2977

Posted by SlipperySlope

Posted by sweetpea2977

Posted by SlipperySlope

Posted by sweetpea2977

Posted by SlipperySlope

You should give him a ticket that has 10 gropes per day or whatever your limit is and if he over does it then he gets no gropes tomorrow.

You should allow a random stranger from your neighborhood to grope your testicles 15x per day and if you're not a satisfied customer, discontinue the service.

Wwaaat?

I gave you a reflection of the response you gave. Neither made sense. Exactly the point.

No. Mine makes perfect sense.

Not to me it doesn't. He's not getting a fucking ticket for something I don't want him doing on the regular. How the hell did you miss that point? Try again.

I didn't, it's a joke.

I really thought you were being a prick. I apologize.

I was tbh...

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Okay. So then, you initially received the response you deserved. Now, go somewhere and sit down please lol

Posted by Antiphates

Posted by SlipperySlope

Posted by sweetpea2977

Posted by SlipperySlope

Posted by sweetpea2977

Posted by SlipperySlope

You should give him a ticket that has 10 gropes per day or whatever your limit is and if he over does it then he gets no gropes tomorrow.

You should allow a random stranger from your neighborhood to grope your testicles 15x per day and if you're not a satisfied customer, discontinue the service.

Wwaaat?

I gave you a reflection of the response you gave. Neither made sense. Exactly the point.

No. Mine makes perfect sense.

You just forgot to give them a proper name.

My suggestion:

Gropons

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LOL!

Posted by xXxAliiciaXxX

At the end of the day if his groping makes you uncomfortable you're not obligated to go with it just because you're together.

Also, if he really loves and respects you he won't try to guilt trip you about it either, which it seems like he might be doing.

I personally don't mind groping as long as it's not public, but if I felt the way you did and he started acting distant after I told him how it makes me uncomfortable, we would have a problem.

In agreement.

I thought for a moment, he could be guilt-tripping me also. But, I actually think I embarrassed him. He kept saying that he didn't know what to say. I could believe that given his personality. He treats me very well typically. This issue was kind of sprung on me. It's like, now, he acts like a boy in a candy store. I don't know if it's because he's pleased with the fact that I have orgasms through nipple stimulation or what. But the shit can't be every day. He got the point lol I didn't care for his extreme quietness either, but honestly, I adjusted as it allowed me time to deal w my own emotions and thoughts behind this. Otherwise, he and I create wonderful memories together. He treats me in a very loving, caring, protective way. This was definitely different and challenging. Thank you for the sound insight 🙂

Posted by SlipperySlope

Posted by sweetpea2977

Posted by SlipperySlope

Posted by sweetpea2977

Posted by SlipperySlope

Posted by sweetpea2977

Posted by SlipperySlope

Posted by sweetpea2977

Posted by SlipperySlope

Posted by sweetpea2977

Posted by SlipperySlope

You should give him a ticket that has 10 gropes per day or whatever your limit is and if he over does it then he gets no gropes tomorrow.

You should allow a random stranger from your neighborhood to grope your testicles 15x per day and if you're not a satisfied customer, discontinue the service.

Wwaaat?

I gave you a reflection of the response you gave. Neither made sense. Exactly the point.

No. Mine makes perfect sense.

Not to me it doesn't. He's not getting a fucking ticket for something I don't want him doing on the regular. How the hell did you miss that point? Try again.

I didn't, it's a joke.

I really thought you were being a prick. I apologize.

I was tbh...

Okay. So then, you initially received the response you deserved. Now, go somewhere and sit down please lol

I'd rather stand, am I permitted to stand?

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As long as you're out of my way, do whatever ya want. Bye now.

Posted by Katana

I personally love it and that's probably because I do it too lol It can only be done in private though, unless it's done in a joking manner in front of others or discreetly done in public places, then it's fine. It's playful and it makes me feel desired by my partner. It's also one of the ways I show affection. It's only annoying when it goes overboard and the other person doesn't know when to stop, or when I'm in a bad mood and don't wish to be touched. I know my limits, but I'm sure I've annoyed people as well. I think it's a normal response when someone is in love with you or very attracted to you.

We aren't all touchy-feely people though and that should be respected, so if you really feel uncomfortable with it then your partner needs to stop. It might put a strain on your connection though, especially if that's the way he expresses his affection for you. Hopefully he can find another way to express himself, one that doesn't make you uncomfortable.

If we're creating this setting together, to me, that makes the difference too. I can't imagine sitting my ass on the couch reading a book and my love grabs my breast and starts squeezing it. I just don't understand that thought process. Again, this is something he wasn't doing for 8 months or so. He may be doing it now because I have orgasms from it. He's so generous towards pleasing me. Such an unselfish lover from the crown of my head to the soles of my feet. I have no complaints. I just don't want to be objectified. I don't want certain parts of me singled out and handled abruptly. That's not romantic and sensitive to me. He doesn't hurt me, but it's not complimentary to who I am. I don't believe moving forward we'll have a strain. We get along very, very well. I think he has been spoiled and instead of acting like an adult, he acts like a boy in a candy store. In the past, he's always been great with me.

Posted by Antiphates

Posted by SlipperySlope

Posted by sweetpea2977

Posted by SlipperySlope

Posted by sweetpea2977

Posted by SlipperySlope

You should give him a ticket that has 10 gropes per day or whatever your limit is and if he over does it then he gets no gropes tomorrow.

You should allow a random stranger from your neighborhood to grope your testicles 15x per day and if you're not a satisfied customer, discontinue the service.

Wwaaat?

I gave you a reflection of the response you gave. Neither made sense. Exactly the point.

No. Mine makes perfect sense.

You just forgot to give them a proper name.

My suggestion:

Gropons

click to expand

😂😂😂😂😂😂

Posted by sweetpea2977

I don't think this issue indicates that I don't know him. He's been very consistent w me, since the day we met.

Does he have a fire mars?

Posted by Katana

Posted by sweetpea2977

Posted by Katana

I personally love it and that's probably because I do it too lol It can only be done in private though, unless it's done in a joking manner in front of others or discreetly done in public places, then it's fine. It's playful and it makes me feel desired by my partner. It's also one of the ways I show affection. It's only annoying when it goes overboard and the other person doesn't know when to stop, or when I'm in a bad mood and don't wish to be touched. I know my limits, but I'm sure I've annoyed people as well. I think it's a normal response when someone is in love with you or very attracted to you.

We aren't all touchy-feely people though and that should be respected, so if you really feel uncomfortable with it then your partner needs to stop. It might put a strain on your connection though, especially if that's the way he expresses his affection for you. Hopefully he can find another way to express himself, one that doesn't make you uncomfortable.

If we're creating this setting together, to me, that makes the difference too. I can't imagine sitting my ass on the couch reading a book and my love grabs my breast and starts squeezing it. I just don't understand that thought process. Again, this is something he wasn't doing for 8 months or so. He may be doing it now because I have orgasms from it. He's so generous towards pleasing me. Such an unselfish lover from the crown of my head to the soles of my feet. I have no complaints. I just don't want to be objectified. I don't want certain parts of me singled out and handled abruptly. That's not romantic and sensitive to me. He doesn't hurt me, but it's not complimentary to who I am. I don't believe moving forward we'll have a strain. We get along very, very well. I think he has been spoiled and instead of acting like an adult, he acts like a boy in a candy store. In the past, he's always been great with me.

Now that you've explained that, him groping you makes even more sense. He's obviously trying to please you, which more than likely gives him a personal sense of pleasure and satisfaction as well. I can understand how that can get annoying overtime though.

It's good that you spoke up for yourself and made it clear it bothers you. Hopefully he can get out of his feelings and correct his behavior, without making it a big issue.

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Thank you 🙂

Yes, he's very happy when pleasing me. I didn't think of it that way; that he was doing that for me. I thought he was doing it more so for himself. But I see that he thought that would make me happier. It backfired. Everything he did before was quite enough. Thanks for pointing that out 🙂

Posted by LadyNeptune

Does he have a fire mars?

I've never looked into charts before, for either of us.

Posted by neves

Posted by sweetpea2977

I don't think this issue indicates that I don't know him. He's been very consistent w me, since the day we met.

https://media1.tenor.com/images/1ed255bd5431a0299acdbabf1819b8da/tenor.gif

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Exactly what I said: He's been very consistent from the day we met. We started dating 3 months later. This issue started some weeks back. What's your question?

Posted by LittleStar

Posted by LadyNeptune

Does he have a fire mars?

Probably Gemini Mars.... lulz

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Hmm. Definitely not this. I see aspects of Virgo and Cancer. But the cons of aggressiveness, stubborness, moodiness, defensiveness are a big no lol He is very, very calm, non argumentative, jack of all trades, patient, kind.

Posted by sweetpea2977

Posted by LittleStar

Posted by LadyNeptune

Does he have a fire mars?

Probably Gemini Mars.... lulz

Hmm. Definitely not this. I see aspects of Virgo and Cancer. But the cons of aggressiveness, stubborness, moodiness, defensiveness are a big no lol He is very, very calm, non argumentative, jack of all trades, patient, kind.

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Cancer Mars groping? No way. I for one can't even picture a water Mars man groping.

Posted by LittleStar

Posted by sweetpea2977

Posted by LittleStar

Posted by LadyNeptune

Does he have a fire mars?

Probably Gemini Mars.... lulz

Hmm. Definitely not this. I see aspects of Virgo and Cancer. But the cons of aggressiveness, stubborness, moodiness, defensiveness are a big no lol He is very, very calm, non argumentative, jack of all trades, patient, kind.

I think it’s a Moon-Mars thing maybe.

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Sounds mean 😢 That's completely not him.

Posted by sweetpea2977

Posted by LadyNeptune

Does he have a fire mars?

I've never looked into charts before, for either of us.

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Prolly for the best. Keep the mystery alive

Posted by Lynx

Posted by sweetpea2977

Here's just one story: via Quora

Originally Answered: Is it ok for my boyfriend to touch me whenever he wants to?

Girl. I feel you, I FEEL YOU. I was seriously shocked I hadn't written this question myself and had to double check. There is nothing worse than being all relaxed on the couch after a hard day at work, ready to get your Pinterest on, when the claw comes out of nowhere to “fiddle the dials.” Or you are dozing so peacfully and suddenly your man pulls a reacharound and decide to pretend your boobs are dough that needs to be kneaded. I hate it, so much.

Okay here's the thing. Most hetero guys love all of our soft bouncy bits. They want to touch, bounce, and play with them. Which is cool, except for the fact that they're attached to our body. Same issue with my boyfriend. He didn't get that it actually HURT when he did some of those things, or that it was extremely fucking annoying to have my nipples played with when I'm trying to do something else.

After multiple conversations he still wasn't getting the picture. He thought I was over reactin. Society and porn had been telling him for years that girls boobs are to be played with, at that women thrust their bosoms forward in orgasmic exctasy when properly stimulate. What are my humdrum complaints going to do against THAT picture?

So what's a girl to do?

Balls.

These soft squishy penduluma were put on this eath to protect women from unwanted nipple pinches everywhere. They are vulnerable. They are weak. And in today's sweatpant society they are oh so exposed.

Flip them. Not hard, you aren’t aiming for pain, but the extremely uncomfortable experience of having a sensitive area constanl stimulated in a not so pleasant way. Hook a finger under them and make a quick “"come hither” motion with your finger. The balls will flip upwards and then bounce back down, not a painful feeling, but not a great one either.

Shocked the heck out of my boyfriend.

He demanded to know why I had started doing this. I spouted back everything he had said about playing with my boobs.

“What? It's fun!”

“Come on it doesn't hurt.”

“We’re dating! You're my man!”

“They're just so bouncy!”

Kept it up for a few days. Guess what my boyfriend doesn't do anymore?

That tip aside, if he REALLY continues to not respect your bundaries you need to have a serious talk with him about how uncomfortable it makes you feel. If he doesn't care, well then you know he doesn't care that you are upset and uncomfortable and what's the point in being with a man like that?

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To answer your title. No, I am not okay with that.

In regards to your message above, I think this post fails to mention that some people (a lot of men) feel closer with sexual touch and intimacy, while others (a lot of women) need to feel closer before having sexual touch and intimacy. I fall into the second category, btw.

Men may do this to feel closer, not because they are objectifying a body. Women can do this too. Everyone is different, but just because you view it one way (you are entitled to feel whatever you feel) doesn't mean that your partner feels the same way about it and is in fact objectifying you. It sounds like you already started a conversation with your partner, so I hope you two can come to an understanding. Good luck

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In agreement 💜 Thank you 🙂

🤭 Hmmm

there’s always an appropriate time for that. But I’m glad my partner have the common sense and gives me respect.

I absolutely do not approve of public touching.