@confusedaries7513
9 Years
Is it wrong to go on a date with a guy you are not attracted to?
Is it okay to date someone you're not initially attracted to
It is common for attraction to develop over time through shared experiences and getting to know someone better. Accepting a date to see if feelings grow is not wrong, especially if you are open to exploring the connection. Genuine interest can evolve as you learn more about each other.
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Attraction can develop over time. I've forced myself to become attracted to people in the past. If you're not even attracted to his energy though I'd keep things really platonic- go dutch on everything. One date never hurts. If you go on one and it isn't your thing, but you enjoyed his company, you can suggest meeting for coffee as just friends/activity buddies. People are surprisingly okay with being told that, even if they might not take you up on the offer.
I will say though- after dating someone I *was* attracted to, I can't go back. There are times you just look at the person and think "Mmm damn". Mundane living becomes pornographic...just so hot to watch them do their thing. I'm not talking about a Ken-doll either. Just someone you find attractive, your taste, even if they're not perfect on your attraction scale. Easier to keep that fire up over time.
Or ask yourself how much sex/attraction means to you. If it doesn't mean much and he doesn't seem to care much about it either, then it's less of a factor for you. If you like everything else, it might be worth a shot, but TAKE IT SLOW, just in case you're committing out of insecurity.
Posted by confusedaries7513
Can attraction develope over time?This guy i have met only once, asked for my facebook and messaged me a few times and asked me out for coffee. I am not attracted to him nor do i see him as anything more than a friend. I also though going to get coffee is not really a date, it can be casual (right?). So i said yes plus i did not want to break his heart, whether his intentions are platonic or not. I discussed this with my friend and she told me that it was better if i had refused his offer since i am not attracted to him. So i'm confused. In my mind i thought i should give him a chance to get to know him and who knows maybe i'll end up being interested in him. I'm very unexperienced in terms of dating/relationships.
So was it wrong of me to accept his offer? Can attraction develop over time?
your friend were right.
Fun fact : marriages that evolve out of two parties who aren't attracted to each other in the beginning tend to last longer than the ones we typically have in the US/ West and see in popular culture.
Why? Because sexual attraction and infatuation fizzles out over time.Your brain can't continue to make and sustain the intense sensations spawning from the chemical cocktail of oxytocin and dopamine that we experience during the infatuation stage.
Moreover the sexual attraction we feel for someone more times than not is also based off of an illusion. We idealize or imagine aspects about the object of our affection in the beginning stages of getting to know someone..however, when in a relationship we eventually see that we were just projecting things on to that person and that they aren't who we thought they were.
If you, however, develope an interest based on someone because of shared experiences, history and go..als..in short a deep friendship ......
that in itself is more sustaining than a superficial attraction that is sure to wan overtime.
I've actually done this before.... lol it did not work out well, at all. I found myself constantly thinking about it & just driving myself crazy over it. He wasn't average, he was butt ugly ??♀️ I tried bc he was sweet & kind & I thought that physical attraction really shouldn't matter, so why not?
I think it does matter to a certain extent. The physical attraction creates the chemistry in the beginning & you go from there.
Posted by confusedaries7513
Can attraction develope over time?This guy i have met only once, asked for my facebook and messaged me a few times and asked me out for coffee. I am not attracted to him nor do i see him as anything more than a friend. I also though going to get coffee is not really a date, it can be casual (right?). So i said yes plus i did not want to break his heart, whether his intentions are platonic or not. I discussed this with my friend and she told me that it was better if i had refused his offer since i am not attracted to him. So i'm confused. In my mind i thought i should give him a chance to get to know him and who knows maybe i'll end up being interested in him. I'm very unexperienced in terms of dating/relationships.
So was it wrong of me to accept his offer? Can attraction develop over time?
It's all in how you give him your cheek when he goes in for the kiss 😛
You can't force attraction. Sure there are other factors thatare involved, but what's really the point of going out on a date you're not into it in the first place?
If you were to go out with him as just friends that would be one thing. However going out with a guy who has romantic interest toward you when you have no feelings towards him sounds like you are leading him on, even if that's not what you mean to do. Just be honest with him.
Ive dated a guy I wasn't physically interested in. It was ok at first until he wanted to always kiss me, which I wasnt into. And then he started asking for more than that and i just couldn't.... that's when I ended it. You absolutely need physical attraction...
Posted by MetalSnake
Attraction can develop over time. I've forced myself to become attracted to people in the past. If you're not even attracted to his energy though I'd keep things really platonic- go dutch on everything. One date never hurts. If you go on one and it isn't your thing, but you enjoyed his company, you can suggest meeting for coffee as just friends/activity buddies. People are surprisingly okay with being told that, even if they might not take you up on the offer.I will say though- after dating someone I *was* attracted to, I can't go back. There are times you just look at the person and think "Mmm damn". Mundane living becomes pornographic...just so hot to watch them do their thing. I'm not talking about a Ken-doll either. Just someone you find attractive, your taste, even if they're not perfect on your attraction scale. Easier to keep that fire up over time.
Or ask yourself how much sex/attraction means to you. If it doesn't mean much and he doesn't seem to care much about it either, then it's less of a factor for you. If you like everything else, it might be worth a shot, but TAKE IT SLOW, just in case you're committing out of insecurity.
gotcha! i really don't know anything about him. we saw each other once and that's it i'm actually very surprised he asked me out. but i couldn't let him down and i wanted to give him a chance. if after the first date i dont feeling, should i tell him?
Posted by confusedaries7513
Can attraction develope over time?This guy i have met only once, asked for my facebook and messaged me a few times and asked me out for coffee. I am not attracted to him nor do i see him as anything more than a friend. I also though going to get coffee is not really a date, it can be casual (right?). So i said yes plus i did not want to break his heart, whether his intentions are platonic or not. I discussed this with my friend and she told me that it was better if i had refused his offer since i am not attracted to him. So i'm confused. In my mind i thought i should give him a chance to get to know him and who knows maybe i'll end up being interested in him. I'm very unexperienced in terms of dating/relationships.
So was it wrong of me to accept his offer? Can attraction develop over time?
your friend were right.
click to expand
but why? i know nothing about his personality. maybe that'll get me interested somehow.
Posted by Adreamuponwaking
Fun fact : marriages that evolve out of two parties who aren't attracted to each other in the beginning tend to last longer than the ones we typically have in the US/ West and see in popular culture.Why? Because sexual attraction and infatuation fizzles out over time.Your brain can't continue to make and sustain the intense sensations spawning from the chemical cocktail of oxytocin and dopamine that we experience during the infatuation stage.
Moreover the sexual attraction we feel for someone more times than not is also based off of an illusion. We idealize or imagine aspects about the object of our affection in the beginning stages of getting to know someone..however, when in a relationship we eventually see that we were just projecting things on to that person and that they aren't who we thought they were.
If you, however, develope an interest based on someone because of shared experiences, history and go..als..in short a deep friendship ......
that in itself is more sustaining than a superficial attraction that is sure to wan overtime.
Very true. we have a lot of things in common and shared experiences so i'm hoping that will spark the chemistry between us somehow. even though i barely know anything about his personality.
As long as you are honest with him from the onset, as in "I am not looking for anything romantic at the moment, but we can meet as friends" then I don't see what harm there is
Posted by Saggi212
My opinion is go on a first date and see what happens.You never knowMy friend did the same to a guy she considered a friend and after that 1st date they are together for a year now!
aw that's amazing! will do 🙂
Posted by leolionlady
I've actually done this before.... lol it did not work out well, at all. I found myself constantly thinking about it & just driving myself crazy over it. He wasn't average, he was butt ugly ??♀️ I tried bc he was sweet & kind & I thought that physical attraction really shouldn't matter, so why not?I think it does matter to a certain extent. The physical attraction creates the chemistry in the beginning & you go from there.
oh no! 😢 did you guys go on a date?
Posted by confusedaries7513
Can attraction develope over time?This guy i have met only once, asked for my facebook and messaged me a few times and asked me out for coffee. I am not attracted to him nor do i see him as anything more than a friend. I also though going to get coffee is not really a date, it can be casual (right?). So i said yes plus i did not want to break his heart, whether his intentions are platonic or not. I discussed this with my friend and she told me that it was better if i had refused his offer since i am not attracted to him. So i'm confused. In my mind i thought i should give him a chance to get to know him and who knows maybe i'll end up being interested in him. I'm very unexperienced in terms of dating/relationships.
So was it wrong of me to accept his offer? Can attraction develop over time?
It's all in how you give him your cheek when he goes in for the kiss 😛
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lol he better not do that on a first date. 🙂)
Posted by confusedaries7513
Can attraction develope over time?This guy i have met only once, asked for my facebook and messaged me a few times and asked me out for coffee. I am not attracted to him nor do i see him as anything more than a friend. I also though going to get coffee is not really a date, it can be casual (right?). So i said yes plus i did not want to break his heart, whether his intentions are platonic or not. I discussed this with my friend and she told me that it was better if i had refused his offer since i am not attracted to him. So i'm confused. In my mind i thought i should give him a chance to get to know him and who knows maybe i'll end up being interested in him. I'm very unexperienced in terms of dating/relationships.
So was it wrong of me to accept his offer? Can attraction develop over time?
The danger in this situation is that a man may come along who excites your eyes, fingertips, hands, mouth, and core in a way your current man simply does not. Then what?? :/ Disaster. If you're not attracted to the idea of sinking into a physical euphoria with him then I consider that to be impartial attraction and I'd suggest you spend your limited time alive elsewhere. It's also really unfair to him. :/
I can guarantee you that someone will come along who captures your eyes in a way that he won't, but I can't guarantee what will ensue afterwards. I don't know if you're loyal and disciplined enough to not let desire creep in...I don't know if the chemistry between you and someone else will outshine the chemistry between you and your current man...if you are not 1,000% satisfied with a man then I don't recommend giving him your limited time alive
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I'm loyal, i'm thinking if after a date i still did not feel anything that i would just tell him i see him as a friend. so that it wouldnt be unfair to him. i gave him a chance cause i know nothing about his personality
Posted by leolionlady
I've actually done this before.... lol it did not work out well, at all. I found myself constantly thinking about it & just driving myself crazy over it. He wasn't average, he was butt ugly ??♀️ I tried bc he was sweet & kind & I thought that physical attraction really shouldn't matter, so why not?I think it does matter to a certain extent. The physical attraction creates the chemistry in the beginning & you go from there.
oh no! 😢 did you guys go on a date?
click to expand
We went on several dates. He ended up wanting more & I just couldn't do it.. I tried him out bc I was so tired of the usual guys I dated. I just wanted someone sweet. He eventually became way too sweet, acted like a woman kinda, always whining about how I wouldn't kiss him or compliment him. So I ultimately had to let him know we couldn't go out anymore. He took it pretty hard. I shouldn't of went out with him in the first place, but lesson learned!
Posted by tiziani
As for the OP question, there's no right or wrong imo. Unless you're accepting it for free dinners out. Can't knock the hustle!
He has done nothing to get me attracted to him, i was so shocked when he asked me out. cause i didn't think he would be interested considering we have only seen each other once for a short amount of time through mutual friends :/
Posted by leolionlady
I've actually done this before.... lol it did not work out well, at all. I found myself constantly thinking about it & just driving myself crazy over it. He wasn't average, he was butt ugly ??♀️ I tried bc he was sweet & kind & I thought that physical attraction really shouldn't matter, so why not?I think it does matter to a certain extent. The physical attraction creates the chemistry in the beginning & you go from there.
oh no! 😢 did you guys go on a date?
We went on several dates. He ended up wanting more & I just couldn't do it.. I tried him out bc I was so tired of the usual guys I dated. I just wanted someone sweet. He eventually became way too sweet, acted like a woman kinda, always whining about how I wouldn't kiss him or compliment him. So I ultimately had to let him know we couldn't go out anymore. He took it pretty hard. I shouldn't of went out with him in the first place, but lesson learned!
click to expand
oh wow. can't say im a fan of guys who are emotionally or physically needy either :/ but thanks for your advice. will keep that in mind
Posted by confusedaries7513
Can attraction develope over time?This guy i have met only once, asked for my facebook and messaged me a few times and asked me out for coffee. I am not attracted to him nor do i see him as anything more than a friend. I also though going to get coffee is not really a date, it can be casual (right?). So i said yes plus i did not want to break his heart, whether his intentions are platonic or not. I discussed this with my friend and she told me that it was better if i had refused his offer since i am not attracted to him. So i'm confused. In my mind i thought i should give him a chance to get to know him and who knows maybe i'll end up being interested in him. I'm very unexperienced in terms of dating/relationships.
So was it wrong of me to accept his offer? Can attraction develop over time?
your friend were right.
but why? i know nothing about his personality. maybe that'll get me interested somehow.
click to expand
small chance 😛
Posted by confusedaries7513
Can attraction develope over time?This guy i have met only once, asked for my facebook and messaged me a few times and asked me out for coffee. I am not attracted to him nor do i see him as anything more than a friend. I also though going to get coffee is not really a date, it can be casual (right?). So i said yes plus i did not want to break his heart, whether his intentions are platonic or not. I discussed this with my friend and she told me that it was better if i had refused his offer since i am not attracted to him. So i'm confused. In my mind i thought i should give him a chance to get to know him and who knows maybe i'll end up being interested in him. I'm very unexperienced in terms of dating/relationships.
So was it wrong of me to accept his offer? Can attraction develop over time?
well since you're asking....
and answers are not always going to please you.
I wouldn't do it. cause YUCKO.
I need to feel like he's yummy and awesome.
not gross.
hm I had to re-think..does attraction develop over time??
NOPE. even if they lost weight and did a lot of good things to themselves. my first reaction and feeling is CONSTANT. I would hope they find someone they like and likes them back!!!
Edit
think about it!!!
if my beloved gained weight and got fat, I would still LOVE the crap out of him because you know why—
my love is constant.
sooooooo reverse that...
if you feel that way the first time why are you fickle?
really don't know anything about him.
we saw each other once ...
but i couldn't let him down and i wanted to give him a chance.
interesting ........
random sales people must love you .. once they get your phone number, surely their next call is to the dentist to set up for gold implants
Posted by confusedaries7513
Can attraction develope over time?This guy i have met only once, asked for my facebook and messaged me a few times and asked me out for coffee. I am not attracted to him nor do i see him as anything more than a friend. I also though going to get coffee is not really a date, it can be casual (right?). So i said yes plus i did not want to break his heart, whether his intentions are platonic or not. I discussed this with my friend and she told me that it was better if i had refused his offer since i am not attracted to him. So i'm confused. In my mind i thought i should give him a chance to get to know him and who knows maybe i'll end up being interested in him. I'm very unexperienced in terms of dating/relationships.
So was it wrong of me to accept his offer? Can attraction develop over time?
well since you're asking....
and answers are not always going to please you.
I wouldn't do it. cause YUCKO.
I need to feel like he's yummy and awesome.
not gross.
click to expand
I'm neutral about him 🙂)
really don't know anything about him.
we saw each other once ...
but i couldn't let him down and i wanted to give him a chance.
interesting ........
random sales people must love you .. once they get your phone number, surely their next call is to the dentist to set up for gold implants
click to expand
lol why are you always so bitter?
i met him through mutual friends at a library. they introduced us and we added each other on facebook that's it 🙂
Posted by Saggi212
My opinion is go on a first date and see what happens.You never knowMy friend did the same to a guy she considered a friend and after that 1st date they are together for a year now!
aw that's amazing! will do 🙂
Yes! From then and on i always go to 1st dates.If nothing happens its one more experience and practise too on the relationship field.Also if you dont want more, you can perfectly refuse a second date and noone is gonna get hurt in fact.
*my friend didnt even really like this guys outer appearence and all these doubts changed in just a date....you see what character can make haha
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absolutely agree with you 🙂 great advice thank you
Posted by Eddie_Vanjovi
In my opinion, you can be the most attractive woman on the planet, but if you're personality is shy of being garbage, you won't be that attractive to me anymore. So, like most people, what I first notice is the physical (what they're doing, what they're saying, and how they present themselves) and that is what first draws me in. After that, I get to know them, and then I would seriously question myself if I want to date them or not or see if there is a possibility of a future together. Friends before lovers I always say.Indian culture, whom practice forced marriages, believe in the principle that you grow to love someone. In some respect, that's true. You're born into a family, and just by the amount of time you spend with your family growing up, and all the events that occur, you basically forever tied to your family even if you like it or not. However, I wouldn't call that love because you share experience and time together.
It's more than possible that, as you get to know him and appreciate him you'll notice he'll become more attractive in time. People tend to forget that physical beauty passes; and what holds two together after that is the experience, the time, and the love of one another's personality or unconditional love, whatever you want to call it (I think you know what I'm trying to say).
Is it wrong? Eh, for me it is. I wouldn't date someone unless I thought there could be a future between each other. I made that mistake once and I felt so sick afterwards. But if you're attracted to them in a different sense, like their mind or some other trait about them that you value in a partner, then, to me, that's also attraction. There had to be something that attracted you to him in the first place to want to try something...unless it's rebound, or pity, or fear of being alone, or wanting to settle because you think there isn't much time left, or some other reason that should never be a basis of a relationship.
So it all depends, really. I'll have to actually read your post more but my kidneys still hurt. I don't want to pay for parking and then wait 8 fucking hours. It's been twice already to the emergency. I got to book an appointment with my doctor. Anyways, I digress.
thanks so much for the advice. hope your kidneys get better 😢
Posted by infires
it's different for different people, personally I need attraction there first or it wont work out and will not be persistent in trying to have a relationship with the person. Sounds shallow but it's not all about looks.It's about personality and their behavior. I look at the little things
I've tried this but attraction does not improve over time, don't force yourself because sooner or later they will know how you feel about them.
My first bf was a cancer, I forced myself into it and he tried literally everything to date me but got shy after asking. I didn't want to hurt his feelings and thought I should try atleast to like me. He broke up with me.
hmm well i need to know him a bit more first i think to know for sure that the attraction isnt there. I'd like to think i value mind over physical appearance. currently i'm neutral about him. will make up my mind on the first date.
really don't know anything about him.
we saw each other once ...
but i couldn't let him down and i wanted to give him a chance.
interesting ........
random sales people must love you .. once they get your phone number, surely their next call is to the dentist to set up for gold implants
lol why are you always so bitter?
i met him through mutual friends at a library. they introduced us and we added each other on facebook that's it 🙂
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why are you always so dumb?
Seriously ..... this really does fly over your head, doesn't it, you literally have no clue as to the implication.
I'd be surprised if you said you aren't making payments on the Brooklyn Bridge, tbh
Why? Because sexual attraction and infatuation fizzles out over time.Your brain can't continue to make and sustain the intense sensations spawning from the chemical cocktail of oxytocin and dopamine that we experience during the infatuation stage.
Ok, not looking to dispute the fact but, on this point, the last time i read the research on this it was cleared up by the original researchers that this ain't the case.
The chemical bonds in our brain at the beginning of attraction die out after 2-3 years only because they give way to supporting a new kind of brain chemistry towards relationships in General. The implication being that the initial attraction is part of the overall process, very much needed no matter how short lived.
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You should read my other post on another topic........
eros aka infatuation is needed often to initiate relationships.......however it doesn't sustain them.
and moreover.......the new chemistry pathways ( aka bonding) won't / can't always form especially if the couple breaks up before then.........
Nothing wrong with getting a coffee, why not? No need for attraction to go on a coffee date .. I need that initial attraction to have it be more than friends , I tried the no attraction thing to see if it could develop , no bueno- I just know off the bat .. hey, u guys could end up being good friends, u never know
really don't know anything about him.
we saw each other once ...
but i couldn't let him down and i wanted to give him a chance.
interesting ........
random sales people must love you .. once they get your phone number, surely their next call is to the dentist to set up for gold implants
lol why are you always so bitter?
i met him through mutual friends at a library. they introduced us and we added each other on facebook that's it 🙂
why are you always so dumb?
Seriously ..... this really does fly over your head, doesn't it, you literally have no clue as to the implication.
I'd be surprised if you said you aren't making payments on the Brooklyn Bridge, tbh
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lmaooooo it say's you're 58 years old but you sound like a 5 year old. wow! interesting
Posted by Eddie_Vanjovi
In my opinion, you can be the most attractive woman on the planet, but if you're personality is shy of being garbage, you won't be that attractive to me anymore. So, like most people, what I first notice is the physical (what they're doing, what they're saying, and how they present themselves) and that is what first draws me in. After that, I get to know them, and then I would seriously question myself if I want to date them or not or see if there is a possibility of a future together. Friends before lovers I always say.Indian culture, whom practice forced marriages, believe in the principle that you grow to love someone. In some respect, that's true. You're born into a family, and just by the amount of time you spend with your family growing up, and all the events that occur, you basically forever tied to your family even if you like it or not. However, I wouldn't call that love because you share experience and time together.
It's more than possible that, as you get to know him and appreciate him you'll notice he'll become more attractive in time. People tend to forget that physical beauty passes; and what holds two together after that is the experience, the time, and the love of one another's personality or unconditional love, whatever you want to call it (I think you know what I'm trying to say).
Is it wrong? Eh, for me it is. I wouldn't date someone unless I thought there could be a future between each other. I made that mistake once and I felt so sick afterwards. But if you're attracted to them in a different sense, like their mind or some other trait about them that you value in a partner, then, to me, that's also attraction. There had to be something that attracted you to him in the first place to want to try something...unless it's rebound, or pity, or fear of being alone, or wanting to settle because you think there isn't much time left, or some other reason that should never be a basis of a relationship.
So it all depends, really. I'll have to actually read your post more but my kidneys still hurt. I don't want to pay for parking and then wait 8 fucking hours. It's been twice already to the emergency. I got to book an appointment with my doctor. Anyways, I digress.
thanks so much for the advice. hope your kidneys get better 😢
No problem. I only hope it helps.
Yeah, I really got to do something about this kidney. A nurse friend of mine keeps warning me of the long term side effects of not immediately going. It's been on and off for weeks but I'm stubborn as hell it seems. 😢
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aww please go see a doctor! take care X hope you feel better soon 🙂
Posted by SofiaV87
Nothing wrong with getting a coffee, why not? No need for attraction to go on a coffee date .. I need that initial attraction to have it be more than friends , I tried the no attraction thing to see if it could develop , no bueno- I just know off the bat .. hey, u guys could end up being good friends, u never know
haha true! 🙂 thanks for the advice.
No it's not wrong. If nothing else you gonna have some fun along interesting conversations and if he invites you, free dinner as well ?
gotcha! i really don't know anything about him. we saw each other once and that's it i'm actually very surprised he asked me out. but i couldn't let him down and i wanted to give him a chance. if after the first date i dont feeling, should i tell him?
I think it's more courteous to do so before he gets too invested. I would. And who knows- maybe if you hang out with him as friends, you'll discover a growing attraction and can pursue the possibility then.
You should feel all warm and fuzzy .... look at how many people are validating your decision to deceive this person.
Posted by MissDiamond
No, it's not wrong, and yes, attraction can definitely develop over time 🙂
Sorry, I tried and tried!!!! 😢 It's like taking a teaspoon of bad medicine; I pinched my nose, took said teaspoon and it STILL tasted bad!
🤗 cyber hugs!
Love,
Eva
I just simply cannot believe that some is actually this stupid.
You even had to ask other people ... that's how clueless you are.
Posted by pisceanloves
No it's not wrong. If nothing else you gonna have some fun along interesting conversations and if he invites you, free dinner as well ?
you're right gurl 😛
Posted by pisceanloves
No it's not wrong. If nothing else you gonna have some fun along interesting conversations and if he invites you, free dinner as well ?
What happened to your left eye?! 😐
Posted by pisceanloves
No it's not wrong. If nothing else you gonna have some fun along interesting conversations and if he invites you, free dinner as well ?What happened to your left eye?! 😐
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What happened to her nose?
Posted by pisceanloves
No it's not wrong. If nothing else you gonna have some fun along interesting conversations and if he invites you, free dinner as well ?What happened to your left eye?! 😐
What happened to her nose?
click to expand
Did you two got into a fight (you broke her nose and she bruised your eye)? 😕
Posted by pisceanloves
No it's not wrong. If nothing else you gonna have some fun along interesting conversations and if he invites you, free dinner as well ?What happened to your left eye?! 😐
What happened to her nose?
Did you two got into a fight (you broke her nose and she bruised your eye)? 😕
click to expand
Yes smh
Posted by pisceanloves
No it's not wrong. If nothing else you gonna have some fun along interesting conversations and if he invites you, free dinner as well ?What happened to your left eye?! 😐
What happened to her nose?
Did you two got into a fight (you broke her nose and she bruised your eye)? 😕
Yes smh
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Oh. 😐
It's just a bruised eye, should heal in couple of days. If a women did that, it's not a such big deal, i suppose. ?
Posted by pisceanloves
No it's not wrong. If nothing else you gonna have some fun along interesting conversations and if he invites you, free dinner as well ?What happened to your left eye?! 😐
What happened to her nose?
Did you two got into a fight (you broke her nose and she bruised your eye)? 😕
Yes smh
Oh. 😐
It's just a bruised eye, should heal in couple of days. If a women did that, it's not a such big deal, i suppose. ?
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It's a shadow idiot
Posted by Chuckcem
You can't force attraction. Sure there are other factors thatare involved, but what's really the point of going out on a date you're not into it in the first place?If you were to go out with him as just friends that would be one thing. However going out with a guy who has romantic interest toward you when you have no feelings towards him sounds like you are leading him on, even if that's not what you mean to do. Just be honest with him.
For some people, attraction can be cultivated over time, provided that there exists some moderate level of interest. However, that doesn't seem to be the case for OP, so I would have turned him down from the get-go. I also don't think it's a good idea to be just friends with someone who is romantically interested in you (unless you started off as friends to begin with).
That said, dating involves risks, and most sensible people are aware that one date does not equate to mutual feelings and/or a future relationship.
It's his choice to smoothly operate the friend zone
lol
Yes.
Posted by Taniwha
If he's paying, order the lobster.
Lol i never let a guy pay for me on a first date.
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Can attraction develope over time?
This guy i have met only once, asked for my facebook and messaged me a few times and asked me out for coffee. I am not attracted to him nor do i see him as anything more than a friend. I also though going to get coffee is not really a date, it can be casual (right?). So i said yes plus i did not want to break his heart, whether his intentions are platonic or not. I discussed this with my friend and she told me that it was better if i had refused his offer since i am not attracted to him. So i'm confused. In my mind i thought i should give him a chance to get to know him and who knows maybe i'll end up being interested in him. I'm very unexperienced in terms of dating/relationships.
So was it wrong of me to accept his offer? Can attraction develop over time?
Update: got coffee with him and really enjoyed his company. Actually a very decent guy so I'm glad i gave him a chance. I also noticed that i am attracted to how tall he is ?