Ladies your standards for a man

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stillstillwater
@stillstillwater
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So ever since my last two ex's (Libra is not really an ex but situationship I guess) I think I have super low standards and expectations from men.

I just wanna check myself. What kinna things are to be expected and a simple thank you or a smile is enough for...and what kinna things do you break out the poetic words for??

Guys -you can also chime in about what kinna things you do that should be given and what kinna things deserve extra appreciation??
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stillstillwater
@stillstillwater
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Posted by jeane

cue classic libra response...

how you treat others (and him) is what you should expect in return.

Are you

respectful?

kind?

attentive?

loving?

giving?

accepting?

understanding?

compassionate?

honest?

responsible?

trustworthy?


These are kinna given and differ from situation as no one can be perfect and be all those things all the time.

How about some examples of practical things?
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stillstillwater
@stillstillwater
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Posted by WarAngel

Making a list and checking it twice will just make you disappointed when not enough check marks get ticked off.

I've been at this game long enough to know, your person will not be everything, everyday for you.


Yeah sooo true! I try to keep this mind esp after reading this book called 'getting the love you want'.

But let's just talk general rather than every single time?
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jeane
@jeane
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Posted by stillstillwater
Posted by jeane

cue classic libra response...

how you treat others (and him) is what you should expect in return.

Are you

respectful?

kind?

attentive?

loving?

giving?

accepting?

understanding?

compassionate?

honest?

responsible?

trustworthy?

These are kinna given and differ from situation as no one can be perfect and be all those things all the time.

How about some examples of practical things?
click to expand



i think that is an individual thing. what is important to you might not matter so much for me. for example, you might want him to have a good relationship with your friends. i don't care about something like that. or you might want him to have a certain level of education or be ready to have children. to me all that sort of stuff is not really important. for me, who he is as a person (does he have integrity, character, is he someone i respect) is what i look for.
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stillstillwater
@stillstillwater
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Posted by PowerLunch
Posted by stillstillwater
Posted by WarAngel

Making a list and checking it twice will just make you disappointed when not enough check marks get ticked off.

I've been at this game long enough to know, your person will not be everything, everyday for you.

Yeah sooo true! I try to keep this mind esp after reading this book called 'getting the love you want'.

But let's just talk general rather than every single time?

What did the book say?
click to expand



The book said that we are naturally attracted to a partner who will serve to fill the gaps from our childhood so regardless of compatibility at some point they will start to act on triggering ways. The way to overcome it is to heal those parts yourself And accept your partner for the flawed person they are so they can heal themselves too because your actions will be triggering for them.

It is to respect the other person as a whole being external of you.... So they're not there just to serve your needs. And give them space to feel like an individual rather than an extension of you. 💭
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stillstillwater
@stillstillwater
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Posted by LuxePurr

Hmmm.. I'm pretty appreciative over the tiniest things and don't really overthink how I react to sweet gestures. If I don't know him well, I smile and say thank you. As we get to know each other, dating for a while and I feel comfortable with him, I tend to show more. I don't really get too poetic, except for when a dude gets a little emotional and opens up to me about his past, goals, passion etc.

Like last time my ram and I hung out. He knows I love chicken nuggets and so when he picked me up, he opened the passenger door for me and I see McNuggies and coffee waiting for me. I actually squealed and kissed him all over. It's simple but cute and thoughtful. And he got the biggest smile on his face with my acting like a 7 year old. 😑

Try not to overthink it and just do or say what you feel at that moment.


Good perspective girl. Guess I'm afraid to come off like no man has ever treated me nice 💔😭 that's my baggage tho and my own reflection...
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stillstillwater
@stillstillwater
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Posted by LuxePurr
Posted by stillstillwater
Posted by LuxePurr

Hmmm.. I'm pretty appreciative over the tiniest things and don't really overthink how I react to sweet gestures. If I don't know him well, I smile and say thank you. As we get to know each other, dating for a while and I feel comfortable with him, I tend to show more. I don't really get too poetic, except for when a dude gets a little emotional and opens up to me about his past, goals, passion etc.

Like last time my ram and I hung out. He knows I love chicken nuggets and so when he picked me up, he opened the passenger door for me and I see McNuggies and coffee waiting for me. I actually squealed and kissed him all over. It's simple but cute and thoughtful. And he got the biggest smile on his face with my acting like a 7 year old. 😑

Try not to overthink it and just do or say what you feel at that moment.

Good perspective girl. Guess I'm afraid to come off like no man has ever treated me nice 💔😭 that's my baggage tho and my own reflection...

Been there, done that. After my Taurus ex, I was shattered and had zero confidence. I was so used to being treated like shit, I didn't know what to do when a guy did something nice for me. It's like I get all suspicious and shit, no idea how to acknowledge it lol. Over time, it'll be natural to you. Good luck!
click to expand



Awww wow babe thanks. It's kinna like that. But I'm a kid at heart so my appreciation and happiness cannot be contained but inside I'm doubtful. But it's exactly like that for me right now...and I'm looking to get grounded
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RabidTalker
@rabidtalker
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Posted by stillstillwater

So ever since my last two ex's (Libra is not really an ex but situationship I guess) I think I have super low standards and expectations from men.

I just wanna check myself. What kinna things are to be expected and a simple thank you or a smile is enough for...and what kinna things do you break out the poetic words for??

Guys -you can also chime in about what kinna things you do that should be given and what kinna things deserve extra appreciation??


Pretty simple for me, if i like you, i want you to like me back. Frequently i can tell i am being measured up to something or someone else, which is a huge turn off.

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stillstillwater
@stillstillwater
8 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 3657 · Posts: 5507 · Topics: 76
Posted by rabidtalker
Posted by stillstillwater

So ever since my last two ex's (Libra is not really an ex but situationship I guess) I think I have super low standards and expectations from men.

I just wanna check myself. What kinna things are to be expected and a simple thank you or a smile is enough for...and what kinna things do you break out the poetic words for??

Guys -you can also chime in about what kinna things you do that should be given and what kinna things deserve extra appreciation??

Pretty simple for me, if i like you, i want you to like me back. Frequently i can tell i am being measured up to something or someone else, which is a huge turn off.
click to expand



Ny questions seem silly compared to your answer.... Well said. Purity is an important part of true love.
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Dazed
@_Dazed
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Posted by stillstillwater

So ever since my last two ex's (Libra is not really an ex but situationship I guess) I think I have super low standards and expectations from men.

I just wanna check myself. What kinna things are to be expected and a simple thank you or a smile is enough for...and what kinna things do you break out the poetic words for??

Guys -you can also chime in about what kinna things you do that should be given and what kinna things deserve extra appreciation??


Has job.

Can cook.
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stillstillwater
@stillstillwater
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@luxepurr men who feed you .. ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Lol my virgo ex was really good at that tho and even now he'll get me food any time any day.

Cancer is good at it too... Surprising me with starbucks drinks and asking if I ate etc. I don't even ask and on the way home he'll be like we are stopping by to get smoothies etc. I think it's just cuz he likes to enjoy food himself lol smh

Yesterday he bought me a chakra alignment book just because he thought it's something I'd like. That' was quite thoughtful and using initiative. It's nice when people just do things that u don't even ask! That's cherry on top....
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longafternoonnaps
@virgoOPPP
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Posted by stillstillwater
Posted by virgoOPPP

1. following scheduled dates (appropriate cancellation procedures will apply)

2. BUT spontaneous dates welcome too

3. my toothbrush exactly where i left it

4. adding me on facebook

compared to joe exotic's attention to carole baskin's bike routine,

these are bare minimums

Adding on facebook? Why's that?
click to expand



adding me on facebook with an account with more than one pic is preferable

i feel like some guys claim they don't have specific social media to hide their situations
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stillstillwater
@stillstillwater
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Posted by LuxePurr
Posted by stillstillwater

@luxepurr men who feed you .. ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Lol my virgo ex was really good at that tho and even now he'll get me food any time any day.

Cancer is good at it too... Surprising me with starbucks drinks and asking if I ate etc. I don't even ask and on the way home he'll be like we are stopping by to get smoothies etc. I think it's just cuz he likes to enjoy food himself lol smh

Yesterday he bought me a chakra alignment book just because he thought it's something I'd like. That' was quite thoughtful and using initiative. It's nice when people just do things that u don't even ask! That's cherry on top....

Same Cancer guy you went out with weeks ago?

Brings you SB drinks, smoothies and chakra alignment books? Girrrrrl.. I like this guy. Lock him down 🔐
click to expand



Yeah same one... He tells me any time you want food just tell me and I'll send it to your house 😯🥰

When we meet up for a walk he shows up w hot chocolate, he pays for all our outings, and says a lotttt of sweet stuff. He wants to see me all the time even if it's just go for a walk and talk. So far so good... I'm not used to this but he says he's not used to being with someone like me either 👀 so we'll see girl...
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stillstillwater
@stillstillwater
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Posted by LuxePurr
Posted by stillstillwater

@luxepurr when the cancer stoped by to drop me off some starbucks once, my dog was barking like crazy and bit his hand (not hard just to make a point lol). And I told my dog infront of him, stop you have to be nice to this man because he feeds us!! Cancer had a good laugh.... Lol but it's true he does haha.

Sounds like you guys are off to a good start. While I had a horrible experience with a Cancer ex (his temper and jealousy), I gotta give them points for being so thoughtful. They will bring you food AND cook for you. Anything to make you happy really.
click to expand



Yepppp he says that all the time he'll do anything to make me happy. Words are nice but we'll see...

Temper and jealousy... I still have a lot going on w my virgo ex that woupd make any man jump off the train easily... But he's handling it like a champ and supporting me... Im really surprised !!
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stillstillwater
@stillstillwater
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Posted by LiterallyStalinG
Posted by CoffeeAndCream

@LiterallyStalinG

what do you mean by this "The brightest light will cast the longest shadows."

I'm going off on tangents without completing my thoughts. Other the the feminine and masculine energies there's also the shadow that lives in our unconscious. Working with this shadow and recognizing it is necessary in self mastery.

Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.

User Submitted Image

Feminine -Anima

Masculine -Animus

The process of finding ones true self is stripping the identities thrust onto you and ingrained into your unconscious by society as a child and bringing them to the surface.

They meet halfway into the middle to unify into your true self. Not the self society tried to make you.

Unity of the capacities of the mind is a hard process but once done very rewarding.



This video is a quick glimpse into this. It explains the masculine in the woman
click to expand



Thanks for sharing. I'll be watching that!
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stillstillwater
@stillstillwater
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Posted by WarAngel

Something I am proud of personally: the three Fs.

1. Fun

2. Food

3. good Fucking

Follow me on DXP for more great tips. 😁


That's all most women want tbh lmao when a man handles his shit hell find that most women are easy going and open to fun/receive... Allowing themselves to be in their feminine energy. Not all women but most.. obv there are still toxic women that no matter what they'll give you shit.
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Soul
@Soul
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Pretty much all women's standards for men is lots of money first and foremost. Good teeth and healthy follows second, then the ability to not care about how flawed the women is ever, or even try to bring it up is third.

No woman will even argue with me either, because they can't lol. No woman would settle for a poor man with a good personality, unless she was an ugly woman with a bad personality.
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stillstillwater
@stillstillwater
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Posted by CoffeeAndCream
Posted by stillstillwater
Posted by LuxePurr
Posted by stillstillwater

@luxepurr when the cancer stoped by to drop me off some starbucks once, my dog was barking like crazy and bit his hand (not hard just to make a point lol). And I told my dog infront of him, stop you have to be nice to this man because he feeds us!! Cancer had a good laugh.... Lol but it's true he does haha.

Sounds like you guys are off to a good start. While I had a horrible experience with a Cancer ex (his temper and jealousy), I gotta give them points for being so thoughtful. They will bring you food AND cook for you. Anything to make you happy really.

Yepppp he says that all the time he'll do anything to make me happy. Words are nice but we'll see...

Temper and jealousy... I still have a lot going on w my virgo ex that woupd make any man jump off the train easily... But he's handling it like a champ and supporting me... Im really surprised !!

what stuff with your ex?

also I wish someone love bombed me right now
click to expand



Na that's too much for dxp to know...

Don't throw your negativity and shade on what I got going on. You don't know if it's love bombing or not.

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stillstillwater
@stillstillwater
8 Years5,000+ Posts

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Posted by stillstillwater
Posted by CoffeeAndCream
Posted by stillstillwater
Posted by LuxePurr
Posted by stillstillwater

@luxepurr when the cancer stoped by to drop me off some starbucks once, my dog was barking like crazy and bit his hand (not hard just to make a point lol). And I told my dog infront of him, stop you have to be nice to this man because he feeds us!! Cancer had a good laugh.... Lol but it's true he does haha.

Sounds like you guys are off to a good start. While I had a horrible experience with a Cancer ex (his temper and jealousy), I gotta give them points for being so thoughtful. They will bring you food AND cook for you. Anything to make you happy really.

Yepppp he says that all the time he'll do anything to make me happy. Words are nice but we'll see...

Temper and jealousy... I still have a lot going on w my virgo ex that woupd make any man jump off the train easily... But he's handling it like a champ and supporting me... Im really surprised !!

what stuff with your ex?

also I wish someone love bombed me right now

Na that's too much for dxp to know...

Don't throw your negativity and shade on what I got going on. You don't know if it's love bombing or not.
click to expand



@coffeeandcream I already got enough trust issues and anxiety about relationships. So many days I'm like I'm not ready to be with anyone 🤦‍♀️
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Soul
@Soul
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Posted by CoffeeAndCream
Posted by WarAngel
Posted by stillstillwater
Posted by WarAngel

Something I am proud of personally: the three Fs.

1. Fun

2. Food

3. good Fucking

Follow me on DXP for more great tips. 😁

That's all most women want tbh lmao when a man handles his shit hell find that most women are easy going and open to fun/receive... Allowing themselves to be in their feminine energy. Not all women but most.. obv there are still toxic women that no matter what they'll give you shit.

It removes complications and expectations. Years of research have gone into this method. 😎

why is everyone mia on zoom

no movie tonight😭 oh well we'll try again tomorrow
click to expand


You dxpnet vets and your zoom lol! I'm actually surprised you all keep it open and public. Back in the day it was awkward to try and do something open with dxpnet members. Too many people trying to shame/ remove specific members they had blocked or didn't like.
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stillstillwater
@stillstillwater
8 Years5,000+ Posts

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Posted by CoffeeAndCream
Posted by stillstillwater
Posted by CoffeeAndCream
Posted by stillstillwater
Posted by LuxePurr
Posted by stillstillwater

@luxepurr when the cancer stoped by to drop me off some starbucks once, my dog was barking like crazy and bit his hand (not hard just to make a point lol). And I told my dog infront of him, stop you have to be nice to this man because he feeds us!! Cancer had a good laugh.... Lol but it's true he does haha.

Sounds like you guys are off to a good start. While I had a horrible experience with a Cancer ex (his temper and jealousy), I gotta give them points for being so thoughtful. They will bring you food AND cook for you. Anything to make you happy really.

Yepppp he says that all the time he'll do anything to make me happy. Words are nice but we'll see...

Temper and jealousy... I still have a lot going on w my virgo ex that woupd make any man jump off the train easily... But he's handling it like a champ and supporting me... Im really surprised !!

what stuff with your ex?

also I wish someone love bombed me right now

Na that's too much for dxp to know...

Don't throw your negativity and shade on what I got going on. You don't know if it's love bombing or not.

it wasn't shade, but ok
click to expand



Love bombing is not a good look
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stillstillwater
@stillstillwater
8 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 3657 · Posts: 5507 · Topics: 76
Posted by CoffeeAndCream
Posted by stillstillwater
Posted by stillstillwater
Posted by CoffeeAndCream
Posted by stillstillwater
Posted by LuxePurr
Posted by stillstillwater

@luxepurr when the cancer stoped by to drop me off some starbucks once, my dog was barking like crazy and bit his hand (not hard just to make a point lol). And I told my dog infront of him, stop you have to be nice to this man because he feeds us!! Cancer had a good laugh.... Lol but it's true he does haha.

Sounds like you guys are off to a good start. While I had a horrible experience with a Cancer ex (his temper and jealousy), I gotta give them points for being so thoughtful. They will bring you food AND cook for you. Anything to make you happy really.

Yepppp he says that all the time he'll do anything to make me happy. Words are nice but we'll see...

Temper and jealousy... I still have a lot going on w my virgo ex that woupd make any man jump off the train easily... But he's handling it like a champ and supporting me... Im really surprised !!

what stuff with your ex?

also I wish someone love bombed me right now

Na that's too much for dxp to know...

Don't throw your negativity and shade on what I got going on. You don't know if it's love bombing or not.

@coffeeandcream I already got enough trust issues and anxiety about relationships. So many days I'm like I'm not ready to be with anyone 🤦‍♀️

i hear you but you seem open to it atleast you're trying
click to expand



True... I'm just trying to keep moving forward ...🏃‍♀️
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stillstillwater
@stillstillwater
8 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 3657 · Posts: 5507 · Topics: 76
Posted by CoffeeAndCream
Posted by stillstillwater
Posted by CoffeeAndCream
Posted by stillstillwater
Posted by CoffeeAndCream
Posted by stillstillwater
Posted by LuxePurr
Posted by stillstillwater

@luxepurr when the cancer stoped by to drop me off some starbucks once, my dog was barking like crazy and bit his hand (not hard just to make a point lol). And I told my dog infront of him, stop you have to be nice to this man because he feeds us!! Cancer had a good laugh.... Lol but it's true he does haha.

Sounds like you guys are off to a good start. While I had a horrible experience with a Cancer ex (his temper and jealousy), I gotta give them points for being so thoughtful. They will bring you food AND cook for you. Anything to make you happy really.

Yepppp he says that all the time he'll do anything to make me happy. Words are nice but we'll see...

Temper and jealousy... I still have a lot going on w my virgo ex that woupd make any man jump off the train easily... But he's handling it like a champ and supporting me... Im really surprised !!

what stuff with your ex?

also I wish someone love bombed me right now

Na that's too much for dxp to know...

Don't throw your negativity and shade on what I got going on. You don't know if it's love bombing or not.

it wasn't shade, but ok

Love bombing is not a good look

OK dude, i just meant i wish i had someone give me warmth and affection the way your crab is showing you

okay

okay

okay
click to expand



Yeah it's a mine field out there tho... 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️

This might turn into that too. Keep an eye out on that 'Cancer man left me' by stillwater
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jc chasez 4ever
@RollergirlOrc
11 Years1,000+ Posts

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Posted by MadTwins80
Posted by RollergirlOrc

You mad? @Madtwins80 😅

Anyway, I think I have high-low expectations. In that I pretend to have low expectations but they turn out to be extremely high. I just want to be treated once in a while yea? I'm the financially lowest maintenance, highest emotional maintenance girl out there..

Mad about what? 🤔
click to expand


Being quoted n attacked. "You mad bro" is this outdated internet meme. Lol