Toxic Possibly Narcississtic Sagittarius Friend

I'm getting sick of this friend's bullshit. She's a typical extroverted, social, free-spirited, always on-the-go and attention-seeking Sagittarius. For some context she has an Aries Moon, Cap Merc, and Virgo Mars. Since I've known her for 3 years, I've always felt like something was off and like she has some narcissistic traits. I didn't want to label her that but...



Last year she hurt my feelings because of the way she spoke harshly, rudely, judgementally to me when I was confiding in her about a boy situation. Her love life is a mess in itself so she has no right to judge mind you, but it was in the way she put me down that made me feel grossly disrespected. I had held onto a lot of past resentments of things and bad treatment I brushed off and this somehow became a tipping point for me.

When I called her out on it, she claimed it was because she was used to speaking loudly and harshly when she cares about something due to it being part of her profession. (In hindsight I think that was just an excuse) I wrote out a lot of things that bothered me, after feeling like a doormat for a long time with her, some of which included my boundaries not being respected and her only talking about herself and her problems and unloading on me constantly without caring about what I have to say.

Now after that, her behaviour towards me completely change. I learned that when you're too nice, people actually start treating you different if you show anger to them. But, I feel like it's all been a bit fake and an overcompensation. She acts overly nice and plays this concerned friend but she will never follow through on ANYTHING that she ever says. She says she will do things just to say it, but never does it, so to me it's felt like she's only trying to play some fake expected role for her own image.

She gives me more space now, when before she would constantly call me just to talk about every single annoyance or problem in her life. I feel like she acts out a bit in passive aggressive ways however, like when we are scheduling a call, she will purposely miss the time and be late to it and make up an excuse. At times, including today, when she would suggest hanging out one-on-one, she'd act like she's trying to make plans but be very wishy-washy and non-commuital about it, then of course does not follow through and makes an excuse last minute to say "let's do this another time" because she was "so busy." This is not someone who cannot make a plan, when she wants to make group plans she will always set a date, place and time and be early to her social gathering!

I don't know what it is, but she will act like a full out entitled, better-than-you asshole. Like last summer a similar thing happened where we were supposed to go hiking a couple hours away from the city, then last minute she told me she had only a few hours of restricted time block to give and decided to invite another friend. And even after I couldnt use my car to drive the distance, she made excuses for not being able to take her car.

So I'm honestly taking much personal offense to this. I'm not sure if she's purposely trying to be passive aggressive and play these games with me (because wouldnt her shadow side be negative Gemini traits and Gemini love mind games?) or maybe she's afraid of spending one on one time with me for whatever reason. I wonder if she has intimacy issues because she always seems to only feel ok with one on one time if the friend is constantly validating her by spending all their time to her calls and beckon. She even made an excuse not to come to my birthday party last year when that was the first event I ever was hosting in my history of knowing her, and I had attended every single social event she planned and was always there for her. It was such bullshit because she literally told me it was because her dad wouldn't let her go out because covid was starting around that time, but then she POSTS ON SOCIAL MEDIA BEING OUT AT A BAR LIKE A DAY OR TWO AFTER.

I find it so damn ironic because she always tries to preach honesty and being genuine but she is certainly not acting like it. I feel like she only uses her friends as accessories; she has a lot of friends and is constantly meeting new people and that seems like a red flag. She only makes plans when it's a group social gathering she planned, so everyone can dress up and look nice for social media posts, so she can make her life look perfect and put together! God i see through people so much. Now I'm wondering if she's a lowkey sociopath or something.

What do you guys think from the glimpse I've given of her? Is she just an asshole or does it sound concerning and pathological? She has shown empathy before for me so I dont think it's narcissism necessarily...but then again it could have been faked. She does this thing where if I say something she completely ignores it and goes on to continue her own thought as if I never said anything at all. Seems like she misses social cues sometimes or just does not give a fuck. She is still a super egotistical and self centered person. I dont know if this friendship is worth continuing anymore...I feel like some toy or accessory shes trying so hard to hold onto even when I've been distancing myself a lot these days. Maybe its also a detachment on her end idek.

I think you’re the asshole.

You’re such a judgmental, whiny little bitch that no wonder she didn’t go to your party.

You judge everything she does or says.

Then go on the internet to tell strangers you think your friend has a personality disorder.

You’re the entitled one needing attention from someone you don’t even respect.

I bet you gossip and talk shit about her to what little friends that will put up with your nonsense.

Look at yourself.

She sounds exhausting.

Good thing is, she gave you the space you wanted.

Now you can focus on yourself...if you can

Posted by DMV

She sounds exhausting.

Good thing is, she gave you the space you wanted.

Now you can focus on yourself...if you can

I wish I had tact like you.

She doesn’t need to be the psychopath you think she is, lol. The problem is that you see her as a close friend, someone who would do things with you on a regular basis. On the other hand, she most likely considers you an acquaintance, one of the many she has. She keeps in touch, but that is it.

You two are part of the same network, and have the typically friendly, but superficial connection. You can’t force her, or anyone else, to be your friend. Close friends are usually those that stood the test of time. Childhood, school, university friends...

You need to revise your expectations. You are pretty low on the list for this person, as for the majority of people you will meet in life. When you find someone who matches and tolerates your kind of madness (this is a common expression, not an offence, btw) stick to that someone.

You both sound codependent. Best to leave her to her own devices and vice versa. If she’s not being a friend, why do you keep entertaining her— Focus and work on yourself and you’ll be alright.

Posted by Moloko_vellocet

I think you’re the asshole.

You’re such a judgmental, whiny little bitch that no wonder she didn’t go to your party.

You judge everything she does or says.

Then go on the internet to tell strangers you think your friend has a personality disorder.

You’re the entitled one needing attention from someone you don’t even respect.

I bet you gossip and talk shit about her to what little friends that will put up with your nonsense.

Look at yourself.

Hmm I wonder if you're projecting here.

You know what, she does the whole judging thing to my face and gossips to me about her BEST friends. I have always had too much moral integrity to ever talk about others behind their back. I don't think it's criminal that I have human feelings and am choosing to safely express it in an online anonymous forum. Nothing I said has anything to do with me being a "whiny little bitch" because excuse me if I let loose sometimes lmao. I never say a single thing to anyone's face ever even when they're being shitty disrespectful people.

Posted by Moloko_vellocet

Posted by DMV

She sounds exhausting.

Good thing is, she gave you the space you wanted.

Now you can focus on yourself...if you can

I wish I had tact like you.

click to expand

I wish you had more empathy.

Posted by Undine

She doesn’t need to be the psychopath you think she is, lol. The problem is that you see her as a close friend, someone who would do things with you on a regular basis. On the other hand, she most likely considers you an acquaintance, one of the many she has. She keeps in touch, but that is it.

You two are part of the same network, and have the typically friendly, but superficial connection. You can’t force her, or anyone else, to be your friend. Close friends are usually those that stood the test of time. Childhood, school, university friends...

You need to revise your expectations. You are pretty low on the list for this person, as for the majority of people you will meet in life. When you find someone who matches and tolerates your kind of madness (this is a common expression, not an offence, btw) stick to that someone.

No no no, she's told me that I'm one of her close friends and we really were pretty close at one point. The problem is, if she were okay with truly acting like an acquaintance I'd be fine with it. But I think it's the trying to act like she cares and keeping me close just so she can step on my toes that gets to me

Posted by Purplesky

Aww, I wouldn't say sagittarius is great at friendship but they're certainly not crap friends...if you share your astrology maybe there's something in your chart. Ime, never got close to one, I find them very independent, clingy to their friends, socialites, and kind of oblivious lol but you told her the issues you were having so that's what stumps me. I once had a Sag coworker who I felt was mad at me in some way but I never told her or addressed the issue (I'm a chicken) I just let it be dead space and carried on, I still think she's a wonderful person but scary when mad. Hope that helped but look within first, sag is rarely wrong, even in their actions.

Yeah they do tend to keep their vulnerable feelings under wraps and let ego and higher thinking rule them. I'm not sure that it's necessarily the sag in her, it might be the aries moon being angry and virgo mars being shitty bc that placement tends to be outright mean and manipulative when angry.

That all may be true, your perspective on what kind of person she is. But YOU are the gatekeeper to your life, that is not her responsibility.

If someone treats you with disrespect or doesn’t give back the effort you are giving then cut 👏 them 👏 out 👏 of 👏 your 👏 life 👏

Period.

Or if you need something to victimize yourself over and keep the drama high in your life then keep her around. Your time is your time after all.

I just don’t see the benefit to you in keeping someone toxic in your life so you can bitch and moan to online strangers. You don’t need us to validate your feelings and intuition that she is a poor friend. If that’s how you feel, that’s your reality.

Posted by bmoon8

TLDR

With friends like you, who needs enemies?

The most loyal dogs will explode in angry and bite back the more abusive treatment they receive.

I do believe my post is emotionally biased because it was written in anger, but the facts remain true.

Posted by AbbyNormal

You both sound codependent. Best to leave her to her own devices and vice versa. If she’s not being a friend, why do you keep entertaining her— Focus and work on yourself and you’ll be alright.

That was probably how the bond started tbh... I feel like I either outgrew her emotionally, figured out enough of how she ticks to get tired of it, and/or I retreat and have an emotional wall up once I feel like someone can hurt me

To all the people hating on me for this post here, I don't think it is indicative of who I am as a person so you have no right to be judging. But it does show the level of anger I feel and how much I take things personally yet still continue to ride it out for whatever reason. Believe it or not I'm not this mean but these are my feelings and I am entitled to them. Yes I am aware I have major trust issues around people from being alienated and hurt in the first half of my life. I stg I am becoming just like my mother.

Posted by themilkyway36

Posted by AbbyNormal

You both sound codependent. Best to leave her to her own devices and vice versa. If she’s not being a friend, why do you keep entertaining her— Focus and work on yourself and you’ll be alright.

That was probably how the bond started tbh... I feel like I either outgrew her emotionally, figured out enough of how she ticks to get tired of it, and/or I retreat and have an emotional wall up once I feel like someone can hurt me

click to expand

Now that you recognize that, next step is taking action. Go your own way and don’t give it another thought. It’ll be great for you so you can focus on your priorities. It sucks, but it happens. Taking things personally will give you wrinkles 😂 Learn to work on yourself and find your confidence.

Posted by themilkyway36

Posted by Moloko_vellocet

I think you’re the asshole.

You’re such a judgmental, whiny little bitch that no wonder she didn’t go to your party.

You judge everything she does or says.

Then go on the internet to tell strangers you think your friend has a personality disorder.

You’re the entitled one needing attention from someone you don’t even respect.

I bet you gossip and talk shit about her to what little friends that will put up with your nonsense.

Look at yourself.

Hmm I wonder if you're projecting here.

You know what, she does the whole judging thing to my face and gossips to me about her BEST friends. I have always had too much moral integrity to ever talk about others behind their back. I don't think it's criminal that I have human feelings and am choosing to safely express it in an online anonymous forum. Nothing I said has anything to do with me being a "whiny little bitch" because excuse me if I let loose sometimes lmao. I never say a single thing to anyone's face ever even when they're being shitty disrespectful people.

click to expand

I’m wondering if you’re deflecting here.

Sounds like you never think you’re the problem.

You actually think a stranger on the internet is projecting on your petty bitchy straight girl drama?

Please, honey. You’re a wet blanket. Quit complaining.

Posted by themilkyway36

Posted by Moloko_vellocet

Posted by DMV

She sounds exhausting.

Good thing is, she gave you the space you wanted.

Now you can focus on yourself...if you can

I wish I had tact like you.

I wish you had more empathy.

click to expand

You seriously want empathy from a stranger after you railroad your friend online?

You need the empathy.

Posted by themilkyway36

I'm getting sick of this friend's bullshit. She's a typical extroverted, social, free-spirited, always on-the-go and attention-seeking Sagittarius. For some context she has an Aries Moon, Cap Merc, and Virgo Mars. Since I've known her for 3 years, I've always felt like something was off and like she has some narcissistic traits. I didn't want to label her that but...



Last year she hurt my feelings because of the way she spoke harshly, rudely, judgementally to me when I was confiding in her about a boy situation. Her love life is a mess in itself so she has no right to judge mind you, but it was in the way she put me down that made me feel grossly disrespected. I had held onto a lot of past resentments of things and bad treatment I brushed off and this somehow became a tipping point for me.

When I called her out on it, she claimed it was because she was used to speaking loudly and harshly when she cares about something due to it being part of her profession. (In hindsight I think that was just an excuse) I wrote out a lot of things that bothered me, after feeling like a doormat for a long time with her, some of which included my boundaries not being respected and her only talking about herself and her problems and unloading on me constantly without caring about what I have to say.

Now after that, her behaviour towards me completely change. I learned that when you're too nice, people actually start treating you different if you show anger to them. But, I feel like it's all been a bit fake and an overcompensation. She acts overly nice and plays this concerned friend but she will never follow through on ANYTHING that she ever says. She says she will do things just to say it, but never does it, so to me it's felt like she's only trying to play some fake expected role for her own image.

She gives me more space now, when before she would constantly call me just to talk about every single annoyance or problem in her life. I feel like she acts out a bit in passive aggressive ways however, like when we are scheduling a call, she will purposely miss the time and be late to it and make up an excuse. At times, including today, when she would suggest hanging out one-on-one, she'd act like she's trying to make plans but be very wishy-washy and non-commuital about it, then of course does not follow through and makes an excuse last minute to say "let's do this another time" because she was "so busy." This is not someone who cannot make a plan, when she wants to make group plans she will always set a date, place and time and be early to her social gathering!

I don't know what it is, but she will act like a full out entitled, better-than-you asshole. Like last summer a similar thing happened where we were supposed to go hiking a couple hours away from the city, then last minute she told me she had only a few hours of restricted time block to give and decided to invite another friend. And even after I couldnt use my car to drive the distance, she made excuses for not being able to take her car.

So I'm honestly taking much personal offense to this. I'm not sure if she's purposely trying to be passive aggressive and play these games with me (because wouldnt her shadow side be negative Gemini traits and Gemini love mind games?) or maybe she's afraid of spending one on one time with me for whatever reason. I wonder if she has intimacy issues because she always seems to only feel ok with one on one time if the friend is constantly validating her by spending all their time to her calls and beckon. She even made an excuse not to come to my birthday party last year when that was the first event I ever was hosting in my history of knowing her, and I had attended every single social event she planned and was always there for her. It was such bullshit because she literally told me it was because her dad wouldn't let her go out because covid was starting around that time, but then she POSTS ON SOCIAL MEDIA BEING OUT AT A BAR LIKE A DAY OR TWO AFTER.

I find it so damn ironic because she always tries to preach honesty and being genuine but she is certainly not acting like it. I feel like she only uses her friends as accessories; she has a lot of friends and is constantly meeting new people and that seems like a red flag. She only makes plans when it's a group social gathering she planned, so everyone can dress up and look nice for social media posts, so she can make her life look perfect and put together! God i see through people so much. Now I'm wondering if she's a lowkey sociopath or something.

What do you guys think from the glimpse I've given of her? Is she just an asshole or does it sound concerning and pathological? She has shown empathy before for me so I dont think it's narcissism necessarily...but then again it could have been faked. She does this thing where if I say something she completely ignores it and goes on to continue her own thought as if I never said anything at all. Seems like she misses social cues sometimes or just does not give a fuck. She is still a super egotistical and self centered person. I dont know if this friendship is worth continuing anymore...I feel like some toy or accessory shes trying so hard to hold onto even when I've been distancing myself a lot these days. Maybe its also a detachment on her end idek.

Give your instincts a gold star, because something is off; two things; her sun is squared her mars, and her moon is squared her mercury. Two squares in her personal planets. While her sun is naturally friendly and fun loving, her squares make her naturally quarrelsome and she's probably been burnt for "being herself" before, so sometimes, she overdoes the friendly bit in public just to be accepted.

My advice is not to point out that she's overdoing it; it'll embarrass her. Just go with it but be careful. If you get too close, eventually, she'll relax and show the tension caused by her planets and reveal how incapable she really is towards supporting other's happiness, indifferent and irritable she deeply is. She might not be capable of giving you the support (or friendship) you desire, because secretly, she's in so much need of support.

Ultimately, when in an exclusive relationship, she might be able to show more support towards her lover, only because she'll feel intimately loved and that can move mountains for someone struggling with planetary problems.

Posted by Moloko_vellocet

Posted by DMV

She sounds exhausting.

Good thing is, she gave you the space you wanted.

Now you can focus on yourself...if you can

I wish I had tact like you.

click to expand

We all choose our stress

And OP has chosen a Sagittarius

Your problem is you can't change her and you want to be a priority in her life but you aren't. Therefore just stop making plans with this woman and move on to other friends. I agree with the poster that said you are more of an acquaintance to this chick than a friend. So treat her as such and get busy doing other things. Why do you need to hang out with her if she upsets you so much? I think I've read this story on another forum.

Posted by themilkyway36

...I find it so damn ironic because she always tries to preach honesty and being genuine but she is certainly not acting like it. I feel like she only uses her friends as accessories; she has a lot of friends and is constantly meeting new people and that seems like a red flag. She only makes plans when it's a group social gathering she planned, so everyone can dress up and look nice for social media posts, so she can make her life look perfect and put together! God i see through people so much. Now I'm wondering if she's a lowkey sociopath or something.

What do you guys think from the glimpse I've given of her? Is she just an asshole or does it sound concerning and pathological? She has shown empathy before for me so I dont think it's narcissism necessarily...but then again it could have been faked. She does this thing where if I say something she completely ignores it and goes on to continue her own thought as if I never said anything at all. Seems like she misses social cues sometimes or just does not give a fuck. She is still a super egotistical and self centered person. I dont know if this friendship is worth continuing anymore...I feel like some toy or accessory shes trying so hard to hold onto even when I've been distancing myself a lot these days. Maybe its also a detachment on her end idek.

I feel like I am reading a teenager's diary....

I'm not really understanding the dilemma here. According to you, you can "see through people so much" and she is either an assh*le or "pathological" (I love how those were the only possible issues here), yet you don't know if you should continue being friends with her? Lol, what exactly do you think that says about you then if you have to even debate this? Would you consume something that you know is toxic? Well that is how you're describing this person, yet debating if you should consume said poison.....unless she isn't the actual problem here. Hmph.

Posted by DMV

She sounds exhausting.

Good thing is, she gave you the space you wanted.

Now you can focus on yourself...if you can

*like* This.

Posted by themilkyway36

Posted by Moloko_vellocet

I think you’re the asshole.

You’re such a judgmental, whiny little bitch that no wonder she didn’t go to your party.

You judge everything she does or says.

Then go on the internet to tell strangers you think your friend has a personality disorder.

You’re the entitled one needing attention from someone you don’t even respect.

I bet you gossip and talk shit about her to what little friends that will put up with your nonsense.

Look at yourself.

Hmm I wonder if you're projecting here.

You know what, she does the whole judging thing to my face and gossips to me about her BEST friends. I have always had too much moral integrity to ever talk about others behind their back. I don't think it's criminal that I have human feelings and am choosing to safely express it in an online anonymous forum. Nothing I said has anything to do with me being a "whiny little bitch" because excuse me if I let loose sometimes lmao. I never say a single thing to anyone's face ever even when they're being shitty disrespectful people.

click to expand

Lol, you don't even see the holes in what you've written here. Carry on....

Posted by xiongmao

Posted by MikeNYNYC

Give your instincts a gold star, because something is off; two things; her sun is squared her mars, and her moon is squared her mercury. Two squares in her personal planets. While her sun is naturally friendly and fun loving, her squares make her naturally quarrelsome and she's probably been burnt for "being herself" before, so sometimes, she overdoes the friendly bit in public just to be accepted.

Not really. The squares just indicate conflicting energies in her chart, where characteristics of one somewhat offsets the characteristics of another.

Like I have Leo Moon and Taurus Mercury. I’m probably more outward than other Taurus Mercury, but in comparison to some other Leo Moons, I’m more quiet.

click to expand

You’re correct; conflict. And mounting inner tension as a result. Squares are the equivalent to planets arguing with eathother’s energy. It’s especially problematic in personal planets, but it could cause some some appealing tension if coming from a generational planet. Feel free to look this up.

I personally think Sags are great friends.

Posted by xiongmao

Posted by MikeNYNYC

Posted by xiongmao

Posted by MikeNYNYC

Give your instincts a gold star, because something is off; two things; her sun is squared her mars, and her moon is squared her mercury. Two squares in her personal planets. While her sun is naturally friendly and fun loving, her squares make her naturally quarrelsome and she's probably been burnt for "being herself" before, so sometimes, she overdoes the friendly bit in public just to be accepted.

Not really. The squares just indicate conflicting energies in her chart, where characteristics of one somewhat offsets the characteristics of another.

Like I have Leo Moon and Taurus Mercury. I’m probably more outward than other Taurus Mercury, but in comparison to some other Leo Moons, I’m more quiet.

You’re correct; conflict. And mounting inner tension as a result. Squares are the equivalent to planets arguing with eathother’s energy. It’s especially problematic in personal planets, but it could cause some some appealing tension if coming from a generational planet. Feel free to look this up.

The tension doesn’t necessarily make someone quarrelsome though. It just requires an outlet (like exercise) and the Sag in question is likely pretty active.

click to expand

Yes, it does. It’s tension. Tension makes those with squares frustrated. A constant state of frustration makes someone argumentative. You have a fixed square. That probably makes your square very stubborn their short term thinking and communication style . But I’m not going to go on and on repeating this to you. Again, feel free to look it up.

Posted by AbbyNormal

Posted by themilkyway36

Posted by AbbyNormal

You both sound codependent. Best to leave her to her own devices and vice versa. If she’s not being a friend, why do you keep entertaining her— Focus and work on yourself and you’ll be alright.

That was probably how the bond started tbh... I feel like I either outgrew her emotionally, figured out enough of how she ticks to get tired of it, and/or I retreat and have an emotional wall up once I feel like someone can hurt me

Now that you recognize that, next step is taking action. Go your own way and don’t give it another thought. It’ll be great for you so you can focus on your priorities. It sucks, but it happens. Taking things personally will give you wrinkles 😂 Learn to work on yourself and find your confidence.

click to expand

You're right it's not healthy to take it personally, I just refuse to be taken for a fool so very self-protective and paranoid right now. Finding myself and my confidence/spirit again has been the theme of my last year or so -

Posted by Moloko_vellocet

Posted by themilkyway36

Posted by Moloko_vellocet

I think you’re the asshole.

You’re such a judgmental, whiny little bitch that no wonder she didn’t go to your party.

You judge everything she does or says.

Then go on the internet to tell strangers you think your friend has a personality disorder.

You’re the entitled one needing attention from someone you don’t even respect.

I bet you gossip and talk shit about her to what little friends that will put up with your nonsense.

Look at yourself.

Hmm I wonder if you're projecting here.

You know what, she does the whole judging thing to my face and gossips to me about her BEST friends. I have always had too much moral integrity to ever talk about others behind their back. I don't think it's criminal that I have human feelings and am choosing to safely express it in an online anonymous forum. Nothing I said has anything to do with me being a "whiny little bitch" because excuse me if I let loose sometimes lmao. I never say a single thing to anyone's face ever even when they're being shitty disrespectful people.

I’m wondering if you’re deflecting here.

Sounds like you never think you’re the problem.

You actually think a stranger on the internet is projecting on your petty bitchy straight girl drama?

Please, honey. You’re a wet blanket. Quit complaining.

click to expand

Who are you to talk when all your posts on other people's topics sound like you're just there to judge and give your hard-nosed and self-righteous answer on other people's lives? If I were you I'd spend a little less time projecting my heavy repressed emotions onto other people's lives on an internet forum (I know, I've been there and done that some 5 years ago) and spend a little more time self-reflecting. If you didn't have this angry energy in yourself, you would not have been so inclined to comment and give such a strong opinion on it.

Posted by PhoenixRising

Posted by themilkyway36

Posted by Moloko_vellocet

I think you’re the asshole.

You’re such a judgmental, whiny little bitch that no wonder she didn’t go to your party.

You judge everything she does or says.

Then go on the internet to tell strangers you think your friend has a personality disorder.

You’re the entitled one needing attention from someone you don’t even respect.

I bet you gossip and talk shit about her to what little friends that will put up with your nonsense.

Look at yourself.

Hmm I wonder if you're projecting here.

You know what, she does the whole judging thing to my face and gossips to me about her BEST friends. I have always had too much moral integrity to ever talk about others behind their back. I don't think it's criminal that I have human feelings and am choosing to safely express it in an online anonymous forum. Nothing I said has anything to do with me being a "whiny little bitch" because excuse me if I let loose sometimes lmao. I never say a single thing to anyone's face ever even when they're being shitty disrespectful people.

Lol, you don't even see the holes in what you've written here. Carry on....

click to expand

enlighten me on these holes

Posted by MikeNYNYC

Posted by xiongmao

Posted by MikeNYNYC

Give your instincts a gold star, because something is off; two things; her sun is squared her mars, and her moon is squared her mercury. Two squares in her personal planets. While her sun is naturally friendly and fun loving, her squares make her naturally quarrelsome and she's probably been burnt for "being herself" before, so sometimes, she overdoes the friendly bit in public just to be accepted.

Not really. The squares just indicate conflicting energies in her chart, where characteristics of one somewhat offsets the characteristics of another.

Like I have Leo Moon and Taurus Mercury. I’m probably more outward than other Taurus Mercury, but in comparison to some other Leo Moons, I’m more quiet.

You’re correct; conflict. And mounting inner tension as a result. Squares are the equivalent to planets arguing with eathother’s energy. It’s especially problematic in personal planets, but it could cause some some appealing tension if coming from a generational planet. Feel free to look this up.

click to expand

You're literally the only person on here to have some logical sense with the facts on here. Everyone else is just busy judging my strong reaction to it. I still trust my instincts because they've never done me wrong. I had a friend in the 5th grade whom I never liked for some reason at the beginning. Our friendship developed from being in the same classes and having the same friends, and I eventually grew to love her as a friend. However, in high school a huge fight went down because she dramatically blew up on me, caused me a lot of hurt feelings.

Anyhow, that synastry analysis sounds about right - I always had a feeling about that. The cap merc I think is also squared her aries moon, and on top of the sun squared mars, our generational pluto sign is Sag and it might be aspecting to her Sun - Sag's in my year are a lot less open and open-minded than other Sag's I see. Our generational jupiter is in Cap so I see it giving it more of Saturnian flavour with Sag being ruled by Jupiter. I have a few square-offs in my chart as well so I feel the whole inner conflict energy. It feels more like a struggle to be one or the other, with both signs never feeling quite "right." What most people don't understand about plutonian and mars energy is that it's hidden, dramatic, intense, and slow-brewing (more for pluto). That's why people love to hate on scorpios who are ruled by pluto and mars, they just don't want to accept the shadow and darker parts of themselves that are present in all human beings. Pluto is also very much about taking revenge and hurting others to get back at them if they felt hurt.

Posted by MikeNYNYC

Posted by xiongmao

Posted by MikeNYNYC

Posted by xiongmao

Posted by MikeNYNYC

Give your instincts a gold star, because something is off; two things; her sun is squared her mars, and her moon is squared her mercury. Two squares in her personal planets. While her sun is naturally friendly and fun loving, her squares make her naturally quarrelsome and she's probably been burnt for "being herself" before, so sometimes, she overdoes the friendly bit in public just to be accepted.

Not really. The squares just indicate conflicting energies in her chart, where characteristics of one somewhat offsets the characteristics of another.

Like I have Leo Moon and Taurus Mercury. I’m probably more outward than other Taurus Mercury, but in comparison to some other Leo Moons, I’m more quiet.

You’re correct; conflict. And mounting inner tension as a result. Squares are the equivalent to planets arguing with eathother’s energy. It’s especially problematic in personal planets, but it could cause some some appealing tension if coming from a generational planet. Feel free to look this up.

The tension doesn’t necessarily make someone quarrelsome though. It just requires an outlet (like exercise) and the Sag in question is likely pretty active.

Yes, it does. It’s tension. Tension makes those with squares frustrated. A constant state of frustration makes someone argumentative. You have a fixed square. That probably makes your square very stubborn their short term thinking and communication style . But I’m not going to go on and on repeating this to you. Again, feel free to look it up.

click to expand

again 100% right

Reminds me of an ex very judgemental friend of mine. I got tired of defending myself and took space & they reacted this way.

See the thing is if you don’t like people, why are you friends with them? Saggies are blunt & sometimes hurt people feelings, we are a little oblivious at times, but also sweet and caring if you’re close to us. On the go perhaps a lot, social yes, and like to have fun. Narcissistic is completely something else. Such a buzz word these days.

It sounds to me she doesn’t feel comfortable being around you anymore for whatever reason. Perhaps she feels you don’t accept her, are judgemental, etc. you may be more sensitive & I’m guessing you’re making a lot of assumptions about intentions. So she hangs with others more. There’s still something to the friendship or else she wouldn’t reach out at all.

What sign are you?

Posted by xiongmao

Posted by MikeNYNYC

Posted by xiongmao

Posted by MikeNYNYC

Posted by xiongmao

Posted by MikeNYNYC

Give your instincts a gold star, because something is off; two things; her sun is squared her mars, and her moon is squared her mercury. Two squares in her personal planets. While her sun is naturally friendly and fun loving, her squares make her naturally quarrelsome and she's probably been burnt for "being herself" before, so sometimes, she overdoes the friendly bit in public just to be accepted.

Not really. The squares just indicate conflicting energies in her chart, where characteristics of one somewhat offsets the characteristics of another.

Like I have Leo Moon and Taurus Mercury. I’m probably more outward than other Taurus Mercury, but in comparison to some other Leo Moons, I’m more quiet.

You’re correct; conflict. And mounting inner tension as a result. Squares are the equivalent to planets arguing with eathother’s energy. It’s especially problematic in personal planets, but it could cause some some appealing tension if coming from a generational planet. Feel free to look this up.

The tension doesn’t necessarily make someone quarrelsome though. It just requires an outlet (like exercise) and the Sag in question is likely pretty active.

Yes, it does. It’s tension. Tension makes those with squares frustrated. A constant state of frustration makes someone argumentative. You have a fixed square. That probably makes your square very stubborn their short term thinking and communication style . But I’m not going to go on and on repeating this to you. Again, feel free to look it up.

Nah, I disagree on that.

I like how you keep repeating “look it up” as if I haven’t done it already. 😉

click to expand

Look closer.

Posted by themilkyway36

Posted by MikeNYNYC

Posted by xiongmao

Posted by MikeNYNYC

Give your instincts a gold star, because something is off; two things; her sun is squared her mars, and her moon is squared her mercury. Two squares in her personal planets. While her sun is naturally friendly and fun loving, her squares make her naturally quarrelsome and she's probably been burnt for "being herself" before, so sometimes, she overdoes the friendly bit in public just to be accepted.

Not really. The squares just indicate conflicting energies in her chart, where characteristics of one somewhat offsets the characteristics of another.

Like I have Leo Moon and Taurus Mercury. I’m probably more outward than other Taurus Mercury, but in comparison to some other Leo Moons, I’m more quiet.

You’re correct; conflict. And mounting inner tension as a result. Squares are the equivalent to planets arguing with eathother’s energy. It’s especially problematic in personal planets, but it could cause some some appealing tension if coming from a generational planet. Feel free to look this up.

You're literally the only person on here to have some logical sense with the facts on here. Everyone else is just busy judging my strong reaction to it. I still trust my instincts because they've never done me wrong. I had a friend in the 5th grade whom I never liked for some reason at the beginning. Our friendship developed from being in the same classes and having the same friends, and I eventually grew to love her as a friend. However, in high school a huge fight went down because she dramatically blew up on me, caused me a lot of hurt feelings.

Anyhow, that synastry analysis sounds about right - I always had a feeling about that. The cap merc I think is also squared her aries moon, and on top of the sun squared mars, our generational pluto sign is Sag and it might be aspecting to her Sun - Sag's in my year are a lot less open and open-minded than other Sag's I see. Our generational jupiter is in Cap so I see it giving it more of Saturnian flavour with Sag being ruled by Jupiter. I have a few square-offs in my chart as well so I feel the whole inner conflict energy. It feels more like a struggle to be one or the other, with both signs never feeling quite "right." What most people don't understand about plutonian and mars energy is that it's hidden, dramatic, intense, and slow-brewing (more for pluto). That's why people love to hate on scorpios who are ruled by pluto and mars, they just don't want to accept the shadow and darker parts of themselves that are present in all human beings. Pluto is also very much about taking revenge and hurting others to get back at them if they felt hurt.

click to expand

Sagittarius are a lot of fun to be around; very light hearted and fascinated by culture. They’re not people to get too deep with regarding discussing emotional issues, from my experience. Which is fine by me though.

Posted by MikeNYNYC

Posted by themilkyway36

Posted by MikeNYNYC

Posted by xiongmao

Posted by MikeNYNYC

Give your instincts a gold star, because something is off; two things; her sun is squared her mars, and her moon is squared her mercury. Two squares in her personal planets. While her sun is naturally friendly and fun loving, her squares make her naturally quarrelsome and she's probably been burnt for "being herself" before, so sometimes, she overdoes the friendly bit in public just to be accepted.

Not really. The squares just indicate conflicting energies in her chart, where characteristics of one somewhat offsets the characteristics of another.

Like I have Leo Moon and Taurus Mercury. I’m probably more outward than other Taurus Mercury, but in comparison to some other Leo Moons, I’m more quiet.

You’re correct; conflict. And mounting inner tension as a result. Squares are the equivalent to planets arguing with eathother’s energy. It’s especially problematic in personal planets, but it could cause some some appealing tension if coming from a generational planet. Feel free to look this up.

You're literally the only person on here to have some logical sense with the facts on here. Everyone else is just busy judging my strong reaction to it. I still trust my instincts because they've never done me wrong. I had a friend in the 5th grade whom I never liked for some reason at the beginning. Our friendship developed from being in the same classes and having the same friends, and I eventually grew to love her as a friend. However, in high school a huge fight went down because she dramatically blew up on me, caused me a lot of hurt feelings.

Anyhow, that synastry analysis sounds about right - I always had a feeling about that. The cap merc I think is also squared her aries moon, and on top of the sun squared mars, our generational pluto sign is Sag and it might be aspecting to her Sun - Sag's in my year are a lot less open and open-minded than other Sag's I see. Our generational jupiter is in Cap so I see it giving it more of Saturnian flavour with Sag being ruled by Jupiter. I have a few square-offs in my chart as well so I feel the whole inner conflict energy. It feels more like a struggle to be one or the other, with both signs never feeling quite "right." What most people don't understand about plutonian and mars energy is that it's hidden, dramatic, intense, and slow-brewing (more for pluto). That's why people love to hate on scorpios who are ruled by pluto and mars, they just don't want to accept the shadow and darker parts of themselves that are present in all human beings. Pluto is also very much about taking revenge and hurting others to get back at them if they felt hurt.

Sagittarius are a lot of fun to be around; very light hearted and fascinated by culture. They’re not people to get too deep with regarding discussing emotional issues, from my experience. Which is fine by me though.

click to expand

Yeah I like them from being so worldly and intellectual people. Definitely a little behind on the emotional development area as a weakness though, that's why they say Sag's can be wise and like a little kid at the same time. Capricorns I think are similar in that regard. They say all old souls have a childlike energy to them

Posted by themilkyway36

Posted by MikeNYNYC

Posted by themilkyway36

Posted by MikeNYNYC

Posted by xiongmao

Posted by MikeNYNYC

Give your instincts a gold star, because something is off; two things; her sun is squared her mars, and her moon is squared her mercury. Two squares in her personal planets. While her sun is naturally friendly and fun loving, her squares make her naturally quarrelsome and she's probably been burnt for "being herself" before, so sometimes, she overdoes the friendly bit in public just to be accepted.

Not really. The squares just indicate conflicting energies in her chart, where characteristics of one somewhat offsets the characteristics of another.

Like I have Leo Moon and Taurus Mercury. I’m probably more outward than other Taurus Mercury, but in comparison to some other Leo Moons, I’m more quiet.

You’re correct; conflict. And mounting inner tension as a result. Squares are the equivalent to planets arguing with eathother’s energy. It’s especially problematic in personal planets, but it could cause some some appealing tension if coming from a generational planet. Feel free to look this up.

You're literally the only person on here to have some logical sense with the facts on here. Everyone else is just busy judging my strong reaction to it. I still trust my instincts because they've never done me wrong. I had a friend in the 5th grade whom I never liked for some reason at the beginning. Our friendship developed from being in the same classes and having the same friends, and I eventually grew to love her as a friend. However, in high school a huge fight went down because she dramatically blew up on me, caused me a lot of hurt feelings.

Anyhow, that synastry analysis sounds about right - I always had a feeling about that. The cap merc I think is also squared her aries moon, and on top of the sun squared mars, our generational pluto sign is Sag and it might be aspecting to her Sun - Sag's in my year are a lot less open and open-minded than other Sag's I see. Our generational jupiter is in Cap so I see it giving it more of Saturnian flavour with Sag being ruled by Jupiter. I have a few square-offs in my chart as well so I feel the whole inner conflict energy. It feels more like a struggle to be one or the other, with both signs never feeling quite "right." What most people don't understand about plutonian and mars energy is that it's hidden, dramatic, intense, and slow-brewing (more for pluto). That's why people love to hate on scorpios who are ruled by pluto and mars, they just don't want to accept the shadow and darker parts of themselves that are present in all human beings. Pluto is also very much about taking revenge and hurting others to get back at them if they felt hurt.

Sagittarius are a lot of fun to be around; very light hearted and fascinated by culture. They’re not people to get too deep with regarding discussing emotional issues, from my experience. Which is fine by me though.

Yeah I like them from being so worldly and intellectual people. Definitely a little behind on the emotional development area as a weakness though, that's why they say Sag's can be wise and like a little kid at the same time. Capricorns I think are similar in that regard. They say all old souls have a childlike energy to them

click to expand

We have some Sag suns with water moons here that strongly compensate in the emotions dept. I think it balances out quite nicely;

Sages are fun, caps are kinda boring (again, unless they have a moon that balances their sun out)

You have 2 choices

Posted by MikeNYNYC

Posted by xiongmao

Posted by MikeNYNYC

Posted by xiongmao

Posted by MikeNYNYC

Give your instincts a gold star, because something is off; two things; her sun is squared her mars, and her moon is squared her mercury. Two squares in her personal planets. While her sun is naturally friendly and fun loving, her squares make her naturally quarrelsome and she's probably been burnt for "being herself" before, so sometimes, she overdoes the friendly bit in public just to be accepted.

Not really. The squares just indicate conflicting energies in her chart, where characteristics of one somewhat offsets the characteristics of another.

Like I have Leo Moon and Taurus Mercury. I’m probably more outward than other Taurus Mercury, but in comparison to some other Leo Moons, I’m more quiet.

You’re correct; conflict. And mounting inner tension as a result. Squares are the equivalent to planets arguing with eathother’s energy. It’s especially problematic in personal planets, but it could cause some some appealing tension if coming from a generational planet. Feel free to look this up.

The tension doesn’t necessarily make someone quarrelsome though. It just requires an outlet (like exercise) and the Sag in question is likely pretty active.

Yes, it does. It’s tension. Tension makes those with squares frustrated. A constant state of frustration makes someone argumentative. You have a fixed square. That probably makes your square very stubborn their short term thinking and communication style . But I’m not going to go on and on repeating this to you. Again, feel free to look it up.

click to expand

True

Sun square Mars is particularly challenging

“The birth chart square between the Sun and Mars suggests that you are very opinionated and preoccupied with having the last word”

Posted by themilkyway36

Posted by AbbyNormal

Posted by themilkyway36

Posted by AbbyNormal

You both sound codependent. Best to leave her to her own devices and vice versa. If she’s not being a friend, why do you keep entertaining her— Focus and work on yourself and you’ll be alright.

That was probably how the bond started tbh... I feel like I either outgrew her emotionally, figured out enough of how she ticks to get tired of it, and/or I retreat and have an emotional wall up once I feel like someone can hurt me

Now that you recognize that, next step is taking action. Go your own way and don’t give it another thought. It’ll be great for you so you can focus on your priorities. It sucks, but it happens. Taking things personally will give you wrinkles 😂 Learn to work on yourself and find your confidence.

You're right it's not healthy to take it personally, I just refuse to be taken for a fool so very self-protective and paranoid right now. Finding myself and my confidence/spirit again has been the theme of my last year or so -

click to expand

Oftentimes during these transitional periods, you find out who your real friends are. People can grow apart and it seems like you’re moving on from her just as much as she is from you—it’s not personal, it just happens. No need for goodbyes, she understands on an unspoken level I think. Just keep moving forward. Anyone who is a real friend will help you do so, not backwards. Being more selective with friends is not a bad thing—quality over quantity.

.. so you and this person are supposedly friends. Said person doesn't act like what a friend should (in your eyes) to you, you explain this to them.. they don't change.. you're butthurt and whatevs.. so.. get.over.it.

People come n go, maybe ya'll needed each other for a season not a lifetime. Stop nitpicking this person to death and go find people who you actually enjoy and if you can't hang the hat up on this then it isn't an issue that person has, it's you.

Posted by xiongmao

Posted by MyStarsShine

Posted by MikeNYNYC

Posted by xiongmao

Posted by MikeNYNYC

Posted by xiongmao

Posted by MikeNYNYC

Give your instincts a gold star, because something is off; two things; her sun is squared her mars, and her moon is squared her mercury. Two squares in her personal planets. While her sun is naturally friendly and fun loving, her squares make her naturally quarrelsome and she's probably been burnt for "being herself" before, so sometimes, she overdoes the friendly bit in public just to be accepted.

Not really. The squares just indicate conflicting energies in her chart, where characteristics of one somewhat offsets the characteristics of another.

Like I have Leo Moon and Taurus Mercury. I’m probably more outward than other Taurus Mercury, but in comparison to some other Leo Moons, I’m more quiet.

You’re correct; conflict. And mounting inner tension as a result. Squares are the equivalent to planets arguing with eathother’s energy. It’s especially problematic in personal planets, but it could cause some some appealing tension if coming from a generational planet. Feel free to look this up.

The tension doesn’t necessarily make someone quarrelsome though. It just requires an outlet (like exercise) and the Sag in question is likely pretty active.

Yes, it does. It’s tension. Tension makes those with squares frustrated. A constant state of frustration makes someone argumentative. You have a fixed square. That probably makes your square very stubborn their short term thinking and communication style . But I’m not going to go on and on repeating this to you. Again, feel free to look it up.

True

Sun square Mars is particularly challenging

“The birth chart square between the Sun and Mars suggests that you are very opinionated and preoccupied with having the last word”

Yeah, but that may only be true for that particular aspect. Moon square mercury, as far as I've read, could even result in a complete communication shut down, rather than argumentative. So I really don't see how the argumentative aspect can be applied for all squares.

Edited to add:

My mom has Sun Square Mars by orb 3 degrees. She can be feisty and sometimes impulsive. I can't remember a single time where she's argumentative. Currently, she lets things go faster than I do.

click to expand

It depends on the self awareness of the person. I think you are and it sounds like your mum is

Then there are the ones who are oblivious to themselves lol, then the squares are exacerbated...

Posted by PhoenixRising

Posted by themilkyway36

...I find it so damn ironic because she always tries to preach honesty and being genuine but she is certainly not acting like it. I feel like she only uses her friends as accessories; she has a lot of friends and is constantly meeting new people and that seems like a red flag. She only makes plans when it's a group social gathering she planned, so everyone can dress up and look nice for social media posts, so she can make her life look perfect and put together! God i see through people so much. Now I'm wondering if she's a lowkey sociopath or something.

What do you guys think from the glimpse I've given of her? Is she just an asshole or does it sound concerning and pathological? She has shown empathy before for me so I dont think it's narcissism necessarily...but then again it could have been faked. She does this thing where if I say something she completely ignores it and goes on to continue her own thought as if I never said anything at all. Seems like she misses social cues sometimes or just does not give a fuck. She is still a super egotistical and self centered person. I dont know if this friendship is worth continuing anymore...I feel like some toy or accessory shes trying so hard to hold onto even when I've been distancing myself a lot these days. Maybe its also a detachment on her end idek.

I feel like I am reading a teenager's diary....

I'm not really understanding the dilemma here. According to you, you can "see through people so much" and she is either an assh*le or "pathological" (I love how those were the only possible issues here), yet you don't know if you should continue being friends with her? Lol, what exactly do you think that says about you then if you have to even debate this? Would you consume something that you know is toxic? Well that is how you're describing this person, yet debating if you should consume said poison.....unless she isn't the actual problem here. Hmph.

click to expand

She’s the friend that won’t let you have any other friends because she needs to be priority.

So I didn’t read alll of it but she seems to just be negatively reacting to you calling her out that one time. By giving you space, cancelling on plans. She’s def being passive aggressive and making you suffer.

But I mean if you don’t like the way she treats you nor believe you can be around her, don’t. I know it hurts (if she’s like a bestie) but sometimes cutting someone off is for your well-being.

Side note: Aries moons on ANY sun 🤢🤢🤢

Are you upset cause she doesn't want to be alone with you? Why do you need her to yourself?

Sag don't like being controlled. The more you push for alone time, the weirder she probably got 😆

If you don't like her behavior, stop hanging around with her, tell her about herself, send this whole post that you've written out. She probably won't bother you again.

No one would want to be friends with a person who thinks of them like this. Why even bother with her?

Posted by AbbyNormal

Posted by themilkyway36

Posted by AbbyNormal

Posted by themilkyway36

Posted by AbbyNormal

You both sound codependent. Best to leave her to her own devices and vice versa. If she’s not being a friend, why do you keep entertaining her— Focus and work on yourself and you’ll be alright.

That was probably how the bond started tbh... I feel like I either outgrew her emotionally, figured out enough of how she ticks to get tired of it, and/or I retreat and have an emotional wall up once I feel like someone can hurt me

Now that you recognize that, next step is taking action. Go your own way and don’t give it another thought. It’ll be great for you so you can focus on your priorities. It sucks, but it happens. Taking things personally will give you wrinkles 😂 Learn to work on yourself and find your confidence.

You're right it's not healthy to take it personally, I just refuse to be taken for a fool so very self-protective and paranoid right now. Finding myself and my confidence/spirit again has been the theme of my last year or so -

Oftentimes during these transitional periods, you find out who your real friends are. People can grow apart and it seems like you’re moving on from her just as much as she is from you—it’s not personal, it just happens. No need for goodbyes, she understands on an unspoken level I think. Just keep moving forward. Anyone who is a real friend will help you do so, not backwards. Being more selective with friends is not a bad thing—quality over quantity.

click to expand

Best way to know if your friends ain’t shyt,

There was a Scorpio man who blocked me online but continued to make posts about me looking like a man and what hurt me more, my so called friends NEVER had my back behind my back. They liked the post, some commented that he ain’t right in the head but nobody said HOLD UP. NOT ON MY WATCH.

I will never forget it, ever

Posted by DMV

Posted by AbbyNormal

Posted by themilkyway36

Posted by AbbyNormal

Posted by themilkyway36

Posted by AbbyNormal

You both sound codependent. Best to leave her to her own devices and vice versa. If she’s not being a friend, why do you keep entertaining her— Focus and work on yourself and you’ll be alright.

That was probably how the bond started tbh... I feel like I either outgrew her emotionally, figured out enough of how she ticks to get tired of it, and/or I retreat and have an emotional wall up once I feel like someone can hurt me

Now that you recognize that, next step is taking action. Go your own way and don’t give it another thought. It’ll be great for you so you can focus on your priorities. It sucks, but it happens. Taking things personally will give you wrinkles 😂 Learn to work on yourself and find your confidence.

You're right it's not healthy to take it personally, I just refuse to be taken for a fool so very self-protective and paranoid right now. Finding myself and my confidence/spirit again has been the theme of my last year or so -

Oftentimes during these transitional periods, you find out who your real friends are. People can grow apart and it seems like you’re moving on from her just as much as she is from you—it’s not personal, it just happens. No need for goodbyes, she understands on an unspoken level I think. Just keep moving forward. Anyone who is a real friend will help you do so, not backwards. Being more selective with friends is not a bad thing—quality over quantity.

Best way to know if your friends ain’t shyt,

There was a Scorpio man who blocked me online but continued to make posts about me looking like a man and what hurt me more, my so called friends NEVER had my back behind my back. They liked the post, some commented that he ain’t right in the head but nobody said HOLD UP. NOT ON MY WATCH.

I will never forget it, ever

click to expand

Fair weather friends 😐

Posted by xiongmao

Posted by themilkyway36

Posted by MikeNYNYC

Posted by xiongmao

Posted by MikeNYNYC

Give your instincts a gold star, because something is off; two things; her sun is squared her mars, and her moon is squared her mercury. Two squares in her personal planets. While her sun is naturally friendly and fun loving, her squares make her naturally quarrelsome and she's probably been burnt for "being herself" before, so sometimes, she overdoes the friendly bit in public just to be accepted.

Not really. The squares just indicate conflicting energies in her chart, where characteristics of one somewhat offsets the characteristics of another.

Like I have Leo Moon and Taurus Mercury. I’m probably more outward than other Taurus Mercury, but in comparison to some other Leo Moons, I’m more quiet.

You’re correct; conflict. And mounting inner tension as a result. Squares are the equivalent to planets arguing with eathother’s energy. It’s especially problematic in personal planets, but it could cause some some appealing tension if coming from a generational planet. Feel free to look this up.

You're literally the only person on here to have some logical sense with the facts on here. Everyone else is just busy judging my strong reaction to it. I still trust my instincts because they've never done me wrong. I had a friend in the 5th grade whom I never liked for some reason at the beginning. Our friendship developed from being in the same classes and having the same friends, and I eventually grew to love her as a friend. However, in high school a huge fight went down because she dramatically blew up on me, caused me a lot of hurt feelings.

Anyhow, that synastry analysis sounds about right - I always had a feeling about that. The cap merc I think is also squared her aries moon, and on top of the sun squared mars, our generational pluto sign is Sag and it might be aspecting to her Sun - Sag's in my year are a lot less open and open-minded than other Sag's I see. Our generational jupiter is in Cap so I see it giving it more of Saturnian flavour with Sag being ruled by Jupiter. I have a few square-offs in my chart as well so I feel the whole inner conflict energy. It feels more like a struggle to be one or the other, with both signs never feeling quite "right." What most people don't understand about plutonian and mars energy is that it's hidden, dramatic, intense, and slow-brewing (more for pluto). That's why people love to hate on scorpios who are ruled by pluto and mars, they just don't want to accept the shadow and darker parts of themselves that are present in all human beings. Pluto is also very much about taking revenge and hurting others to get back at them if they felt hurt.

I'm honestly not judging, nor am I undermining your intuition. It's just in your post, you had a lot of "I feel..." and much less things like results from what happened when you communicate with her. From what you describe, she doesn't sound like a great friend. I empathize your frustration. But...your thoughts about her, your frustrations about her....how much and how often do you actually tell her?

I have no issue in accepting the darker parts of myself. I have inclination for debates, discussions, and arguments because I'm a triple fire with mars in gemini. It's precisely my earth placements that square those fire placements that helps me learn to be less so.

click to expand

The "I feel" statements are a moon in the 1st house thing lol. I know that gives me a tendency to be oversensitive to every little thing and take it personally. My cap sun makes me hide it because it doesn't like to act overly emotional. I'm trying to work through things in myself but it's just been a triggerfest lately with everything and everyone - I always feel walked on and my boundaries crossed by so many people.

Posted by bmoon8

Posted by themilkyway36

Posted by bmoon8

TLDR

With friends like you, who needs enemies?

The most loyal dogs will explode in angry and bite back the more abusive treatment they receive.

I do believe my post is emotionally biased because it was written in anger, but the facts remain true.

I never abused dogs, so don’t know firsthand if it is true or not. It’s definitely plausible.

The thing is.. no one is perfect and we are all flawed in some way. There are certain flaws that do not meet our standards and we should count our losses, and move on. Otherwise, if these flaws are acceptable to you, but they bother you to a degree where you have to air dirty laundry out to a bunch of strangers online, you are not a true friend. If you were true friend and these things bother you, why not tell her to her face? Why not be open and honest with “your friend”? The worst case scenario is she would not take you seriously and keep doing the same shit. However, best case scenario is that she would change.

click to expand

You're right about everyone having flaws and weaknesses, I've acted out in some pretty bad ways in the past unknowingly before too. I did think about myself and how it looks from an objective place based on what some people on here said, and truth be told I realize I'm doing the same thing my mother did to me. She would do all the necessary things but act out in small passive aggressive ways, and I'd hear her talk vehemently about me behind my back all the time without trying to understand me...so I guess I do the exact same pattern. idk anymore I have deep trust issues because I was hurt so much

Posted by AbbyNormal

Posted by themilkyway36

Posted by AbbyNormal

Posted by themilkyway36

Posted by AbbyNormal

You both sound codependent. Best to leave her to her own devices and vice versa. If she’s not being a friend, why do you keep entertaining her— Focus and work on yourself and you’ll be alright.

That was probably how the bond started tbh... I feel like I either outgrew her emotionally, figured out enough of how she ticks to get tired of it, and/or I retreat and have an emotional wall up once I feel like someone can hurt me

Now that you recognize that, next step is taking action. Go your own way and don’t give it another thought. It’ll be great for you so you can focus on your priorities. It sucks, but it happens. Taking things personally will give you wrinkles 😂 Learn to work on yourself and find your confidence.

You're right it's not healthy to take it personally, I just refuse to be taken for a fool so very self-protective and paranoid right now. Finding myself and my confidence/spirit again has been the theme of my last year or so -

Oftentimes during these transitional periods, you find out who your real friends are. People can grow apart and it seems like you’re moving on from her just as much as she is from you—it’s not personal, it just happens. No need for goodbyes, she understands on an unspoken level I think. Just keep moving forward. Anyone who is a real friend will help you do so, not backwards. Being more selective with friends is not a bad thing—quality over quantity.

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Oh yeah these are trying times alright. I may honestly lose most of my already few friends by the end of this year if things keep going this way. It's feeling a very fine line between stepping into my power and self-sabotaging/isolating right now

Posted by saggurl88

Are you upset cause she doesn't want to be alone with you? Why do you need her to yourself?

Sag don't like being controlled. The more you push for alone time, the weirder she probably got 😆

If you don't like her behavior, stop hanging around with her, tell her about herself, send this whole post that you've written out. She probably won't bother you again.

No one would want to be friends with a person who thinks of them like this. Why even bother with her?

I wasn't the one who asked to do something alone, it was feeling like I was being manipulated and strung along when honestly I would just be more at peace being left alone and not asked at all. If anything, she's worse than me and I've seen it in the way she treats her other friends. I'm not even wrong about the facts of my character judgement here lmao. 2 examples, she told her guy best friend to his face while we were having a group dinner once that he got fat. Who does that? Another time she showed a picture of the girlfriend of her other good friend to an entire group at her own birthday celebration to judge and laugh at how "ugly and fat" the girl was. Oh and she full on told me how she showed the picture of the guy I was seeing to all her close friends and how they all thought he was ugly.

I guess we all have our own kinds of ugly right!