whatisthisallabout
@whatisthisallabout
8 Years1,000+ Posts
Comments: 41 · Posts: 1963 · Topics: 41
Do you want to know
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Well, my opinion will probably be irrelevant as well since you are asking men.
But as I need a break from work, here are my 2cents ?
If it is early stages, 1-3 dates I wouldnt say im meeting other people. Thats what the dating stage is about...getting to know someone and then based on that decide whether I would like to proceed or not. So in the beggining I wouldnt ask a man that. I would even go as far as assuming he would be meeting other people.
That level of honesty wouldnt bring anything good to the table, just insecurities.
But if after a while the dating is interesting and consistent, then I would ask.
So my answer would be: evening was good and yours? 🙂
But as I need a break from work, here are my 2cents ?
If it is early stages, 1-3 dates I wouldnt say im meeting other people. Thats what the dating stage is about...getting to know someone and then based on that decide whether I would like to proceed or not. So in the beggining I wouldnt ask a man that. I would even go as far as assuming he would be meeting other people.
That level of honesty wouldnt bring anything good to the table, just insecurities.
But if after a while the dating is interesting and consistent, then I would ask.
So my answer would be: evening was good and yours? 🙂
What's wrong with someone dating others when you're still getting to know each other? If anything, if you pique any bit of interest to her, she could drop them for you. You'd only feel like an idiot if you didn't make the greatest impression on her or something out of everyone else. Egos.
Or step it up and tell her u want to be exclusive??
She is in search of her next boyfriend maybe your not making your feelings clear. Why should she wait around? If you want her tell her you want her..then if she tells you she doesn't want to be exclusive then disengage. There are some men that will express their feelings...so if she is the one you want, then go for it..
She is in search of her next boyfriend maybe your not making your feelings clear. Why should she wait around? If you want her tell her you want her..then if she tells you she doesn't want to be exclusive then disengage. There are some men that will express their feelings...so if she is the one you want, then go for it..
Posted by tizianiIt is awkward. 😄
It sounds awkward.
@OP
Unless you've established a commitment, it
would kind of fall in the NOYB category.
If you want exclusivity, you have to ask for it.
🙂
Posted by leowwwTo me dating and hanging out are the same thing.Posted by DreamyboyThis.
I'd definitely want to know so that I know I'm not wasting my time.
I'm too old school for "nonchalant dating".
I'd wanna know.
Plus.. To me dating you're already exclusive, otherwise we're just hanging out getting to know each other.click to expand
I come from a country where we dont have this 'dating' thing like in the US. There are no formalities or expectations after 'a date'. We just hang out until ... well, until we stop hanging out or become bf/gf.
When a bitch tells me that she's dating around, I don't take her seriously anymore. And I definitely quit paying for her fucking meals and shit. I'm not going to be just another simp that pays for you to eat every week.
On top of that, if we date, and she's still "dating around". Obviously she's not that into me, so fuck that bitch.
On top of that, if we date, and she's still "dating around". Obviously she's not that into me, so fuck that bitch.
Plus, we all know that "dating" these days is just another term for fucking. So if she's "dating" around, she's sleeping around. And I'm not trying to turn a whore into a wife. Let me know, so I can cut ties with your ass early!
Posted by tizianiYes, very, especially when he comes back with *yes thanks and she was a great lay*
It sounds awkward.
😛
Her response is completely up to her, that is assuming we're in the beginning stages of seeing each other. I would prefer she tell me if she were on a date, but if she doesn't want to reveal it, I have no issues with that. I'm sure I'd find out in the future anyway, especially if we did end up dating.
Posted by tizianiDo you think it should be presumed or avoidedPosted by MontgomeryLol it sounds like a reminder of why I avoided dating.Posted by tizianiIt is awkward. 😄
It sounds awkward.
@OP
Unless you've established a commitment, it
would kind of fall in the NOYB category.
If you want exclusivity, you have to ask for it.
🙂
And men asking for exclusivity sounds awkward to me. In all seriousness.
click to expand
or... I'm a little confused.
😕
Posted by sagsagsagIt does seem better to be transparent with the person about what is going on than to have the person find it out himself.Posted by Smidge+1
i would rather know, because if i wasn't told i'd feel like i was being taken for an idiot.
but i'm not a man, so maybe my answer is irrelevant.
And if I ever find out, I'd delete you from my memory space.. you dont exist in my eyes.
but im not a man too so my answer might be irrelevant too mehehehehehe ?click to expand
Posted by ScorpGHow if the girl tells you she is talking to other people at the moment when you ask her out on a date or reveals that to you on your first date?
Of course you should know and just move on...
Would you still ask her out or you'd just move on?
Posted by IamAriesSo it sounds like it is consideired social acceptable to not share this information within the first 3 dates?
Well, my opinion will probably be irrelevant as well since you are asking men.
But as I need a break from work, here are my 2cents ?
If it is early stages, 1-3 dates I wouldnt say im meeting other people. Thats what the dating stage is about...getting to know someone and then based on that decide whether I would like to proceed or not. So in the beggining I wouldnt ask a man that. I would even go as far as assuming he would be meeting other people.
That level of honesty wouldnt bring anything good to the table, just insecurities.
But if after a while the dating is interesting and consistent, then I would ask.
So my answer would be: evening was good and yours? 🙂
Posted by SassyKiwiI can see that it is an ego thing. Probably people with a health ego wouldn't mind.
What's wrong with someone dating others when you're still getting to know each other? If anything, if you pique any bit of interest to her, she could drop them for you. You'd only feel like an idiot if you didn't make the greatest impression on her or something out of everyone else. Egos.
Posted by LibrajeanI think guys usually know if they are attracted to the girl very quickly, but it may take them a while to decide if they want to date the girl seriously...
Or step it up and tell her u want to be exclusive??
She is in search of her next boyfriend maybe your not making your feelings clear. Why should she wait around? If you want her tell her you want her..then if she tells you she doesn't want to be exclusive then disengage. There are some men that will express their feelings...so if she is the one you want, then go for it..
Posted by MontgomeryWhat is NOYB??Posted by tizianiIt is awkward. 😄
It sounds awkward.
@OP
Unless you've established a commitment, it
would kind of fall in the NOYB category.
If you want exclusivity, you have to ask for it.
🙂click to expand
Posted by DreamyboyHow early do you want to know? Do you want the girl to tell you she has been on a couple of dates/talking with a couple of guys at the momenet you ask her out so that you can decide if you want to even go on a date with her at all?
I'd definitely want to know so that I know I'm not wasting my time.
Posted by whatisthisallaboutIn a sense it is. If I meet someone whether through a dating app or organically and he says: would you like to have a cooffee or go for dinner, whatever, I dont want him to expect me to not see other people too. I dont know if I like the guy, I dont know if we are going to be friends only. You just handlg out and see.Posted by IamAriesSo it sounds like it is consideired social acceptable to not share this information within the first 3 dates?
Well, my opinion will probably be irrelevant as well since you are asking men.
But as I need a break from work, here are my 2cents ?
If it is early stages, 1-3 dates I wouldnt say im meeting other people. Thats what the dating stage is about...getting to know someone and then based on that decide whether I would like to proceed or not. So in the beggining I wouldnt ask a man that. I would even go as far as assuming he would be meeting other people.
That level of honesty wouldnt bring anything good to the table, just insecurities.
But if after a while the dating is interesting and consistent, then I would ask.
So my answer would be: evening was good and yours? 🙂click to expand
After a fee days I find it very legitimate, but not in the beginning, maybe after 3 dates or encounters or whatever you call it.
As someone else said here, in the beggining I dont care either if he is going out with other women. Of course he is, I would assume. But it is not about other women, they will always exist. It is about 'us', if we like each other independent of that.
Am I making any sense here?
Posted by cvurkoThanks for adding the concrete answer lol
Although a comparison with looking at the menu when you visit a new restaurant sounds a bit dull im gonna make it. Isnt it normal to see what's on the menu and pick the meal you like the most? Everybody wants what is best for him, its normal to compare more aggressively at that stage.
Have confidence you will be the one she picks. And if she doesn't pick you, well then you weren't going to make a good couple anyway ^^ Nothing wrong with having some competition ??
Edit: to respond to the question in a more concrete way - i wouldn't care one bit if i know or not. Even further, i would presume she sees other people as well.
Are you implying that you will take your time as well and if you decide that you really like the girl then you will ask her to be exclusive later on?
Posted by leowwwI guess then it is better to clarify these things before even going on a first date?Posted by DreamyboyThis.
I'd definitely want to know so that I know I'm not wasting my time.
I'm too old school for "nonchalant dating".
I'd wanna know.
Plus.. To me dating you're already exclusive, otherwise we're just hanging out getting to know each other.click to expand
Posted by TeddyBearMDSo do you ask her if she's seeing other people when you ask her out on a first date?
When a bitch tells me that she's dating around, I don't take her seriously anymore. And I definitely quit paying for her fucking meals and shit. I'm not going to be just another simp that pays for you to eat every week.
On top of that, if we date, and she's still "dating around". Obviously she's not that into me, so fuck that bitch.
Posted by earlorg16It seems to me that you feel it is cool for both parties to keep the options open in the early stage?
Her response is completely up to her, that is assuming we're in the beginning stages of seeing each other. I would prefer she tell me if she were on a date, but if she doesn't want to reveal it, I have no issues with that. I'm sure I'd find out in the future anyway, especially if we did end up dating.
Based on your experience, how many dates or how much time you'd spend with her (e.g 2-3 months) before you decide that you should become more seriously and be exclusive?
Posted by SmidgeWould you ask them directly or you'd wait for them to tell you?
going back to what i said previously... i wouldn't mind if they were dating other people, that's not an issue for me, they can do what they like they're single.
but i'd want to know, so that i didn't feel like an idiot.
Posted by tizianiDo you think that if she likes you, she will stop talking to other guys naturally anyways?Posted by MontgomeryI'm sort of parallel to cvurko's thinking: other men don't matter. The problems (if there are any) between her and I would be our own to sort out.Posted by tizianiDo you think it should be presumed or avoidedPosted by MontgomeryLol it sounds like a reminder of why I avoided dating.Posted by tizianiIt is awkward. 😄
It sounds awkward.
@OP
Unless you've established a commitment, it
would kind of fall in the NOYB category.
If you want exclusivity, you have to ask for it.
🙂
And men asking for exclusivity sounds awkward to me. In all seriousness.
or... I'm a little confused.
😕
click to expand
Posted by IamAriesThanks for the clarification. Yea, I agree that it is really hard to say if you will even go on more dates when it is within the first 3 dates. It does seem a little too serious to talk about whether there are othe people when you both are not sure how you feel about each other.Posted by whatisthisallaboutIn a sense it is. If I meet someone whether through a dating app or organically and he says: would you like to have a cooffee or go for dinner, whatever, I dont want him to expect me to not see other people too. I dont know if I like the guy, I dont know if we are going to be friends only. You just handlg out and see.Posted by IamAriesSo it sounds like it is consideired social acceptable to not share this information within the first 3 dates?
Well, my opinion will probably be irrelevant as well since you are asking men.
But as I need a break from work, here are my 2cents ?
If it is early stages, 1-3 dates I wouldnt say im meeting other people. Thats what the dating stage is about...getting to know someone and then based on that decide whether I would like to proceed or not. So in the beggining I wouldnt ask a man that. I would even go as far as assuming he would be meeting other people.
That level of honesty wouldnt bring anything good to the table, just insecurities.
But if after a while the dating is interesting and consistent, then I would ask.
So my answer would be: evening was good and yours? 🙂
After a fee days I find it very legitimate, but not in the beginning, maybe after 3 dates or encounters or whatever you call it.
As someone else said here, in the beggining I dont care either if he is going out with other women. Of course he is, I would assume. But it is not about other women, they will always exist. It is about 'us', if we like each other independent of that.
Am I making any sense here?click to expand
Posted by cvurkoYea, that makes sense. Exclusive means not talking to/seeing other people romantically. So when you decide that you want to focus on this one girl, would you tell her that you expect her to only focus on you as well?Posted by whatisthisallaboutWhen you say exclusive do you include sex? I dont have sex with people other than my partner so if i dont have a partner (just dates) i wont be having sex at all. Yup, im pretty monogamous...Posted by cvurkoThanks for adding the concrete answer lol
Although a comparison with looking at the menu when you visit a new restaurant sounds a bit dull im gonna make it. Isnt it normal to see what's on the menu and pick the meal you like the most? Everybody wants what is best for him, its normal to compare more aggressively at that stage.
Have confidence you will be the one she picks. And if she doesn't pick you, well then you weren't going to make a good couple anyway ^^ Nothing wrong with having some competition ??
Edit: to respond to the question in a more concrete way - i wouldn't care one bit if i know or not. Even further, i would presume she sees other people as well.
Are you implying that you will take your time as well and if you decide that you really like the girl then you will ask her to be exclusive later on?
I am very picky, i can talk or go out with different girls (and some might perceive it as a date, dunno) but when i like someone im focused on her. I'd date only her (and will still go out with my female friends or acquaintances). I just know that that's me and dont expect the girl to be the same way.click to expand
Posted by tizianiSo how do you know where you stand with the girl then? 😕Posted by whatisthisallaboutI think that depends on the person.Posted by tizianiDo you think that if she likes you, she will stop talking to other guys naturally anyways?Posted by MontgomeryI'm sort of parallel to cvurko's thinking: other men don't matter. The problems (if there are any) between her and I would be our own to sort out.Posted by tizianiDo you think it should be presumed or avoidedPosted by MontgomeryLol it sounds like a reminder of why I avoided dating.Posted by tizianiIt is awkward. 😄
It sounds awkward.
@OP
Unless you've established a commitment, it
would kind of fall in the NOYB category.
If you want exclusivity, you have to ask for it.
🙂
And men asking for exclusivity sounds awkward to me. In all seriousness.
or... I'm a little confused.
😕
click to expand
Posted by leowwwI see. How do you distinguish between getting to know each other/hanging out and dating?Posted by whatisthisallaboutIs this your first time going out with the guy?Posted by leowwwI guess then it is better to clarify these things before even going on a first date?Posted by DreamyboyThis.
I'd definitely want to know so that I know I'm not wasting my time.
I'm too old school for "nonchalant dating".
I'd wanna know.
Plus.. To me dating you're already exclusive, otherwise we're just hanging out getting to know each other.
(Cause I don't consider that dating lol
To me that's hanging out/getting to know each other... I'm weird though.)
If so, get to know him, soon enough you should know if he's seeing other women....
Then decide what you wanna do.click to expand
Do you verify with the other person that you are "dating"?
I have been going on dates with 4 people that I met online, but with each of them, it has been 3 dates or less.
I feel it is very hard to decide their interest level this early. I feel even if the first 3 dates go well, they may meet someone else just the next day. Plus, since we all met online, I think this is more likely to happen than you meet in real life.
Posted by PeanutButterandEllyYea. So far it seems like some guys do not feel bothered at all, but some guys seem to feel offended that the girl talks to other people/goes on dates with other people.
As a woman who has dated multiple people at once I wish more men would answer. I find the replies fascinating. Most never ask. They might fish around but it's very rare they ask directly.
Previously when I dated multiple people at once I was seeing two different genders though, which I've found most men see as completely non threatening. Only once have I dated two men at the same time. Even that didn't last long. One won out pretty quickly over the other.
It really is hard to draw the line.
I agree that most guys dont' even ask. The ones who get offended usually assume that you are not talking to other people. The ones who are not bothered usually assume that you talk to other people.
Posted by cvurkoHow if you really like the girl but you are not sure if you want her to be your girl friend just yet?Posted by whatisthisallaboutNope, i'd just tell her i like her and would wait to see what her decision will be. If she decides to be with me, then i would expect us to be exclusive and would not be ok with the opposite.Posted by cvurkoYea, that makes sense. Exclusive means not talking to/seeing other people romantically. So when you decide that you want to focus on this one girl, would you tell her that you expect her to only focus on you as well?Posted by whatisthisallaboutWhen you say exclusive do you include sex? I dont have sex with people other than my partner so if i dont have a partner (just dates) i wont be having sex at all. Yup, im pretty monogamous...Posted by cvurkoThanks for adding the concrete answer lol
Although a comparison with looking at the menu when you visit a new restaurant sounds a bit dull im gonna make it. Isnt it normal to see what's on the menu and pick the meal you like the most? Everybody wants what is best for him, its normal to compare more aggressively at that stage.
Have confidence you will be the one she picks. And if she doesn't pick you, well then you weren't going to make a good couple anyway ^^ Nothing wrong with having some competition ??
Edit: to respond to the question in a more concrete way - i wouldn't care one bit if i know or not. Even further, i would presume she sees other people as well.
Are you implying that you will take your time as well and if you decide that you really like the girl then you will ask her to be exclusive later on?
I am very picky, i can talk or go out with different girls (and some might perceive it as a date, dunno) but when i like someone im focused on her. I'd date only her (and will still go out with my female friends or acquaintances). I just know that that's me and dont expect the girl to be the same way.
click to expand
For example, you have been going on dates like once a week for a month. It's been a month but you have only seen each other 4 times. You prob just begin to invest in her emotionally, but you still don't know each other well enough... I think it is kinda tricky because you like the person, you want to date her, but you are not at the stage to be bf/gf yet. Would you still ask the girl not to see other guys?
The most confusing thing about this thread to me is the word / concept of Date - Dating
I dont have a word for that in my language.
We just meet people, or go out / hang with someone.
I just use it in English. But is seems to come with a lot of connotations and a protocol of its own.
I dont have a word for that in my language.
We just meet people, or go out / hang with someone.
I just use it in English. But is seems to come with a lot of connotations and a protocol of its own.
Posted by whatisthisallaboutNone of your business.Posted by MontgomeryWhat is NOYB??Posted by tizianiIt is awkward. 😄
It sounds awkward.
@OP
Unless you've established a commitment, it
would kind of fall in the NOYB category.
If you want exclusivity, you have to ask for it.
🙂
click to expand
Posted by whatisthisallaboutYes! You cant force it!Posted by tizianiDo you think that if she likes you, she will stop talking to other guys naturally anyways?Posted by MontgomeryI'm sort of parallel to cvurko's thinking: other men don't matter. The problems (if there are any) between her and I would be our own to sort out.Posted by tizianiDo you think it should be presumed or avoidedPosted by MontgomeryLol it sounds like a reminder of why I avoided dating.Posted by tizianiIt is awkward. 😄
It sounds awkward.
@OP
Unless you've established a commitment, it
would kind of fall in the NOYB category.
If you want exclusivity, you have to ask for it.
🙂
And men asking for exclusivity sounds awkward to me. In all seriousness.
or... I'm a little confused.
😕
click to expand
Posted by tizianiPosted by MyStarsShineLOL!Posted by tizianiYes, very, especially when he comes back with *yes thanks and she was a great lay*
It sounds awkward.
😛click to expand
Par for the course tiz 😛
If you are going to date someone who can't make their flaky mind up whether they want to be with just you, be prepared for stories
Lol
Posted by tizianiHow early do you bring up this kind of discussion?Posted by whatisthisallaboutPosted by tizianiSo how do you know where you stand with the girl then? 😕Posted by whatisthisallaboutI think that depends on the person.Posted by tizianiDo you think that if she likes you, she will stop talking to other guys naturally anyways?Posted by MontgomeryI'm sort of parallel to cvurko's thinking: other men don't matter. The problems (if there are any) between her and I would be our own to sort out.Posted by tizianiDo you think it should be presumed or avoidedPosted by MontgomeryLol it sounds like a reminder of why I avoided dating.Posted by tizianiIt is awkward. 😄
It sounds awkward.
@OP
Unless you've established a commitment, it
would kind of fall in the NOYB category.
If you want exclusivity, you have to ask for it.
🙂
And men asking for exclusivity sounds awkward to me. In all seriousness.
or... I'm a little confused.
😕
Vageenka said something I relate to in another thread about getting to know one another's values and that's very solid ground.click to expand
Posted by SeraphlightI guess this conversation should happen before the first date to clarify if he's talking to other girls?Posted by whatisthisallaboutI would assume we were exclusive. And if we aren't I wouldn't date the guy...
if a girl you just begin seeing is also going on dates with other people? Or do you not care since it is early stage (you are still getting to know each other)?
For example, when you text the girl, "How was your evening?" and she actually went on a date with another dude, would you rather she tells you that she went on a date, or would you rather she just gives you a general "good/fine/bad" response?click to expand
Posted by leowwwI see. That makes sense. When I meet people in real life, it is usually one at a time.
Yeah you have the talk I guess, you check in if he's seeing someone else... And vice versa... Always happened naturally for me..
Dating to me you're exclusive after going out / hanging out and getting to know each other better..
Well if you're going on "dates" with several guys it's hard to focus on getting to know one well enough... Your time / attention is divided.
Like I said.. I'm probably not the best person to advise you.. I'm old school... Ive never done the online dating website thing... It's always been one guy at a time lol
Posted by Smidge"How was the other one......better or worse than me*?Posted by whatisthisallabouti wouldn't pry but if the conversation was naturally going in that direction then i might bring it up.Posted by SmidgeWould you ask them directly or you'd wait for them to tell you?
going back to what i said previously... i wouldn't mind if they were dating other people, that's not an issue for me, they can do what they like they're single.
but i'd want to know, so that i didn't feel like an idiot.
click to expand
Lol
Posted by SmidgeThat sounds good. I told one guy on a first date that I was talking to other people since we were talking about our past experience with online dating anyways.Posted by whatisthisallabouti wouldn't pry but if the conversation was naturally going in that direction then i might bring it up.Posted by SmidgeWould you ask them directly or you'd wait for them to tell you?
going back to what i said previously... i wouldn't mind if they were dating other people, that's not an issue for me, they can do what they like they're single.
but i'd want to know, so that i didn't feel like an idiot.
click to expand
Posted by MontgomeryOh. HAHAPosted by whatisthisallaboutNone of your business.Posted by MontgomeryWhat is NOYB??Posted by tizianiIt is awkward. 😄
It sounds awkward.
@OP
Unless you've established a commitment, it
would kind of fall in the NOYB category.
If you want exclusivity, you have to ask for it.
🙂
click to expand
Posted by DreamyboyThat's good to know. On the other hand, do you think it would be weird if the girl tells you she's talking to other people on the 1st or 2nd date? I am kinda curious because the person can either interpret it as honesty ("She is trying to be transparent.") or a lack of interest ("Is she hinting that she wants to date other people?").Posted by whatisthisallaboutHmmm... how early?..... I would say after the 4th or 5th date for me. And yes I would really appreciate if she told me she was on a couple of dates or talking with another person. Honesty builds trust. I do enjoy a game here and there if it's not a losing battle, but communication is key.Posted by DreamyboyHow early do you want to know? Do you want the girl to tell you she has been on a couple of dates/talking with a couple of guys at the momenet you ask her out so that you can decide if you want to even go on a date with her at all?
I'd definitely want to know so that I know I'm not wasting my time.
click to expand
Posted by whatisthisallaboutPosted by leowwwI see. That makes sense. When I meet people in real life, it is usually one at a time.
Yeah you have the talk I guess, you check in if he's seeing someone else... And vice versa... Always happened naturally for me..
Dating to me you're exclusive after going out / hanging out and getting to know each other better..
Well if you're going on "dates" with several guys it's hard to focus on getting to know one well enough... Your time / attention is divided.
Like I said.. I'm probably not the best person to advise you.. I'm old school... Ive never done the online dating website thing... It's always been one guy at a time lol
click to expand
It cuts down the chances of calling out the wrong name at the point of orgasm
Lol
Posted by ImpulsvThat is a very honest response!
I don't need to know otherwise
I'll judge you or pull way back
Posted by Freetobe007I haven't had sex with any of my prospects but good point.
Yes. I want to know what I'm signing up for. Especiaially if there's sex involved because at that point, he could be putting me at risk just to date around and be passive about it. I'm not cool with the idea of dating a man who just had someone else's ass bouncing on his cock.
Posted by cvurkoWow, you are very chill. Good for you 🙂Posted by whatisthisallaboutI would only expect (not even ask) from her to not see other guys (romantically) when we become partners. Before that she can do whatever she wants/needs, if i get hurt its my problem, she has no moral obligations to not date others from my perspective.Posted by cvurkoHow if you really like the girl but you are not sure if you want her to be your girl friend just yet?Posted by whatisthisallaboutNope, i'd just tell her i like her and would wait to see what her decision will be. If she decides to be with me, then i would expect us to be exclusive and would not be ok with the opposite.Posted by cvurkoYea, that makes sense. Exclusive means not talking to/seeing other people romantically. So when you decide that you want to focus on this one girl, would you tell her that you expect her to only focus on you as well?Posted by whatisthisallaboutWhen you say exclusive do you include sex? I dont have sex with people other than my partner so if i dont have a partner (just dates) i wont be having sex at all. Yup, im pretty monogamous...Posted by cvurkoThanks for adding the concrete answer lol
Although a comparison with looking at the menu when you visit a new restaurant sounds a bit dull im gonna make it. Isnt it normal to see what's on the menu and pick the meal you like the most? Everybody wants what is best for him, its normal to compare more aggressively at that stage.
Have confidence you will be the one she picks. And if she doesn't pick you, well then you weren't going to make a good couple anyway ^^ Nothing wrong with having some competition ??
Edit: to respond to the question in a more concrete way - i wouldn't care one bit if i know or not. Even further, i would presume she sees other people as well.
Are you implying that you will take your time as well and if you decide that you really like the girl then you will ask her to be exclusive later on?
I am very picky, i can talk or go out with different girls (and some might perceive it as a date, dunno) but when i like someone im focused on her. I'd date only her (and will still go out with my female friends or acquaintances). I just know that that's me and dont expect the girl to be the same way.
For example, you have been going on dates like once a week for a month. It's been a month but you have only seen each other 4 times. You prob just begin to invest in her emotionally, but you still don't know each other well enough... I think it is kinda tricky because you like the person, you want to date her, but you are not at the stage to be bf/gf yet. Would you still ask the girl not to see other guys?
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Posted by MyStarsShineHave you had people actually ask that?! 😱Posted by Smidge"How was the other one......better or worse than me*?Posted by whatisthisallabouti wouldn't pry but if the conversation was naturally going in that direction then i might bring it up.Posted by SmidgeWould you ask them directly or you'd wait for them to tell you?
going back to what i said previously... i wouldn't mind if they were dating other people, that's not an issue for me, they can do what they like they're single.
but i'd want to know, so that i didn't feel like an idiot.
Lol
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Posted by whatisthisallaboutPosted by MyStarsShineHave you had people actually ask that?! 😱Posted by Smidge"How was the other one......better or worse than me*?Posted by whatisthisallabouti wouldn't pry but if the conversation was naturally going in that direction then i might bring it up.Posted by SmidgeWould you ask them directly or you'd wait for them to tell you?
going back to what i said previously... i wouldn't mind if they were dating other people, that's not an issue for me, they can do what they like they're single.
but i'd want to know, so that i didn't feel like an idiot.
Lol
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Who me?
Christ no.......I am a one man at a time woman
Life is challenging enough without having more than one fella in it...
Nightmare
😱
Posted by Smidge......or even worse "today"Posted by MyStarsShinelolPosted by Smidge"How was the other one......better or worse than me*?Posted by whatisthisallabouti wouldn't pry but if the conversation was naturally going in that direction then i might bring it up.Posted by SmidgeWould you ask them directly or you'd wait for them to tell you?
going back to what i said previously... i wouldn't mind if they were dating other people, that's not an issue for me, they can do what they like they're single.
but i'd want to know, so that i didn't feel like an idiot.
Lol
"soooo.. would you say i'm the best you've had this week..." >_>
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Haahaa
Posted by PeanutButterandEllyI guess it is telling of the guy's personality/emotional maturity for sure.Posted by whatisthisallaboutYeah that's been my observation as well. Truly tiz's method was spot on. Even if I was only seeing one man, if he acted offended at the idea I'd continue to date others without us speaking on it I'd normally lose interest.Posted by PeanutButterandEllyYea. So far it seems like some guys do not feel bothered at all, but some guys seem to feel offended that the girl talks to other people/goes on dates with other people.
As a woman who has dated multiple people at once I wish more men would answer. I find the replies fascinating. Most never ask. They might fish around but it's very rare they ask directly.
Previously when I dated multiple people at once I was seeing two different genders though, which I've found most men see as completely non threatening. Only once have I dated two men at the same time. Even that didn't last long. One won out pretty quickly over the other.
It really is hard to draw the line.
I agree that most guys dont' even ask. The ones who get offended usually assume that you are not talking to other people. The ones who are not bothered usually assume that you talk to other people.
Not gonna lie and say a large part of me choosing the one I did was because he handled the situation much like tiz's philosophy. I found it to be very sexy and very respectful of my life and choices. I could tell he was a little jealous. But I could also tell he held himself responsible for it and didn't say anything to me. That level of emotional maturity elevated him over competition.click to expand
I usually end up with the guy who is more laid back and not overly jealous as well.
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