rockTenn
@rockTenn
16 Years
Comments: 0 Ā· Posts: 130 Ā· Topics: 6
Lost the hots for my aqua man :-/
I prefer to let things fade out, but then I notice he starts making extra effort....effort that doesnāt change my mind... Sucks bc we have lots of fun and I donāt want to lose the social aspect of our friendship.
Aries lol
Aw really? You donāt want to be with him anymore?
@Leo188881 I get why you suggest this route & I've already thought to do this myself bc I know it will work. Unfortunately my ego is too big and Iām not disgusted by him (yet)...just donāt want to date him anymore. For what itās worth (mars in Scorpio here) once upon a time weād need to change the sheets after sex, the other day I almost grabbed some lube.
I hate to say it, but Iām thinking itās best to just be honest. I donāt think he will stalk, but he will go the extra mile to ramp up the very things that have turned me off in the first place. At which point I will actually become annoyed, but Iāve figured out how to tease him such that he cuts out the silly shit.
I hate to say it, but Iām thinking itās best to just be honest. I donāt think he will stalk, but he will go the extra mile to ramp up the very things that have turned me off in the first place. At which point I will actually become annoyed, but Iāve figured out how to tease him such that he cuts out the silly shit.
Posted by SmidgeThe mature part of me agrees that itās unnecessary, but honesty isnāt always the best policy. Sometimes being clever gets the job done better.Posted by Leo188881Sounds complicated and unnecessary to me.Posted by SmidgeIt's to put him off, not to blame him. That way he doesn't get as hurt because he wont like her either so he doesn't feel so dumped. They're bad at being dumped. It might be fucked up but I think it's kinder to make him feel like he doesn't like you so he can get over it, than to flat out dump him while he has feelingsPosted by Leo188881He's not making her feel like a "queen" in her words. Not necessarily his fault.Posted by SmidgePosted by Leo188881So, make him think it's his fault?
I don't know if you can let it fade out. Aqua like space so he'll probably just think you're giving it to him.
If you want to lose him, you need to step up the clingy neediness. Send texts, followed by why haven't you replied? What are you doing? Why are you ignoring me? Why have you become distant? Then tell him that he can't give you the affection and time you need in a relationship but that you care for him and would like to remain friends.
Wow.
He's not making her feel special or cared for. If she flat out dumps him, she runs the risk of obsessed stalker status. At least this way he'll feel it's mutual because she's annoying..
All she has to say is the truth, she doesn't need to act clingy just so she can blame him.
That's all kinds of fecked up.
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Posted by pinkbird03I just donāt see it going anywhere
Aw really? You donāt want to be with him anymore?
Posted by rockTennSorry to break it to you but unless you were friends years prior to dating...you arenāt friends. He approached and pursued you because heās romantically interested. If he agrees to being friends itās because heās hoping for another shot at the pussy, not because he wants to be a friend fixture in your life.
I prefer to let things fade out, but then I notice he starts making extra effort....effort that doesnāt change my mind... Sucks bc we have lots of fun and I donāt want to lose the social aspect of our friendship.
Posted by IkyflLmfao! Wow, so me no longer wanting to be intimate with him is making all Aries look bad?
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Aries always on here making the rest of us look bad
I guess we only look good when we let aquas have their way with us. I thought I was being an upstanding citizen by seeking input on how to handle this.
Posted by IkyflTrollingPosted by rockTennYou need to know how to handle a breakup in a way that you can still use him when it is advantageous to you. Thatās why the facepalm.Posted by IkyflLmfao! Wow, so me no longer wanting to be intimate with him is making all Aries look bad?
š¤¦š½āāļø
Aries always on here making the rest of us look bad
I guess we only look good when we let aquas have their way with us. I thought I was being an upstanding citizen by seeking input on how to handle this.
click to expand
Looking through your other posts you say youāve been with this aqua 4-5 years?
Please donāt ghost someone who has invested so much time in you. Itās just not classy. He deserves a face to face break up.
Please donāt ghost someone who has invested so much time in you. Itās just not classy. He deserves a face to face break up.
Posted by clownloyalYouāre right. Thatās just what Iām going to do.
it's not that hard to say: "i'm no longer interested in you, but I'd like to be friends"
Posted by LadyNeptuneI agree. He fakes like heās extremely emotionless, can lose anyone any time & not care...so Iāve assumed that applies to me as well, but just in case it doesnāt Iāll let him know I donāt want to date him anymore.
Looking through your other posts you say youāve been with this aqua 4-5 years?
Please donāt ghost someone who has invested so much time in you. Itās just not classy. He deserves a face to face break up.
How do you know that he isn't thinking the same thing? Aquas tend to sabotage relationships they're not happy in so that the other person will break up with them first
Posted by rockTennDonāt assume. Tell him how his behavior makes you feel. Communicate what you need. 5 years is a long time to just throw away without making one last effort.Posted by LadyNeptuneI agree. He fakes like heās extremely emotionless, can lose anyone any time & not care...so Iāve assumed that applies to me as well, but just in case it doesnāt Iāll let him know I donāt want to date him anymore.
Looking through your other posts you say youāve been with this aqua 4-5 years?
Please donāt ghost someone who has invested so much time in you. Itās just not classy. He deserves a face to face break up.click to expand
Posted by sultrykittyYes aquas are very passive aggressive, so I donāt know what heās thinking.
How do you know that he isn't thinking the same thing? Aquas tend to sabotage relationships they're not happy in so that the other person will break up with them first
Posted by sultrykitty
How do you know that he isn't thinking the same thing? Aquas tend to sabotage relationships they're not happy in so that the other person will break up with them first
i saw that in Ashton Kutcher. smh. a mile away.
guess he wanted to have children badly so he got with mila kunis and they started making babies.
although not sure about other aquas. lol it might have to do with his placements.
super stelliuim 5-6 aqua with cancer mars.
yeah it might have to do with different placements and upbringing/circumstances.
Posted by AerialViewlol it's the avatar that is making me lol
Aries lol
Posted by lisabethur8Posted by AerialViewlol it's the avatar that is making me lol
Aries lolclick to expand
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Posted by SeleukosGood question! In my case attention & being wanted has made my happy for a fair amount of time.Posted by rockTennI never understood the queen thing.
Hello Everyone!
Ok so long story short, I can safely say that the googley eyed phase is over for me.
I need to understand myself a bit better to identify why...but hey...Iām an Aries so this could just be some typical Aries loss of interest. Trust me, I have my reasons, but can admit that Iām not feeling like a āqueenā in his life and thatās the primary reason.
I want to just be friends now. No kissing, sex, etc. Should I tell him or just let it fade out?
I understand the need to get attention and to be wanted.
Wouldn't is be enough that he wants to spend time with you, assuming that would be the case?click to expand
Heās giving that to other women also. Leaving me feeling that Iām honestly just a FWB...not very queen-like. This can be spun to say itās not so much about feeling Iām a queen, but wanting a commitment. Either way, itās made me lose the hots bc what turned me on was how I perceived him and perceived his feelings toward me. Now I perceive it as everything with a vagina gets the same.
Follow me?
I think Iāve nailed whatās killing the hots for me on top of not feeling like a queen. heās way too into picking and analyzing my brain that heās not revealing whatās going on in his. Leaving me blind. Not his fault nor do I feel Iām the bad person for how I feel. Iām not ripping aqua men and Iām not a bad selfish person for my current feelings. Each of us are being who we are and some incompatibilities are revealing themselves.
Do I think heās trying to break up with me? Maybe.
Do I think Iām trying to break up with him? Maybe.
I have no ghosting plans, but really just donāt think it warrants a discussion with him. All Iād be saying is I donāt think we should continue a sexual relationship. He claims to have non sexual relationships with a few ladies that he once had sex with so this is normal for him. Plus if you see my past posts, I did overcome a drinking habit which I warned him that the sober version of me takes life more serious where I reprioritize my focus/attention. A truly good reward for me & the man that loves me like a queen
Do I think heās trying to break up with me? Maybe.
Do I think Iām trying to break up with him? Maybe.
I have no ghosting plans, but really just donāt think it warrants a discussion with him. All Iād be saying is I donāt think we should continue a sexual relationship. He claims to have non sexual relationships with a few ladies that he once had sex with so this is normal for him. Plus if you see my past posts, I did overcome a drinking habit which I warned him that the sober version of me takes life more serious where I reprioritize my focus/attention. A truly good reward for me & the man that loves me like a queen
Posted by rockTennThis is pretty typical Aqua, IME. No judgement at all, most women really aren't on board with it and there's nothing wrong with that.
I think Iāve nailed whatās killing the hots for me on top of not feeling like a queen. heās way too into picking and analyzing my brain that heās not revealing whatās going on in his. Leaving me blind. Not his fault nor do I feel Iām the bad person for how I feel. Iām not ripping aqua men and Iām not a bad selfish person for my current feelings. Each of us are being who we are and some incompatibilities are revealing themselves.
Do I think heās trying to break up with me? Maybe.
Do I think Iām trying to break up with him? Maybe.
I have no ghosting plans, but really just donāt think it warrants a discussion with him. All Iād be saying is I donāt think we should continue a sexual relationship. He claims to have non sexual relationships with a few ladies that he once had sex with so this is normal for him. Plus if you see my past posts, I did overcome a drinking habit which I warned him that the sober version of me takes life more serious where I reprioritize my focus/attention. A truly good reward for me & the man that loves me like a queen
Posted by SeleukosI swear I donāt think he will go Aqua crazy and wouldnāt even think of it had it not been mentioned twice here...but since itās mentioned I do notice that any sign of me pulling away he does create something awesome that I canāt say no to. Anyway I guess I think he will understand it because he has seen me evolve and will respect my position. Unless thereās a side to aquas that Iām missing lolPosted by JadeAlexanderTrue, but only if he goes full Aqua crazy.Posted by SeleukosPosted by rockTennRelax, there is no need to be overly defensive.
I think Iāve nailed whatās killing the hots for me on top of not feeling like a queen. heās way too into picking and analyzing my brain that heās not revealing whatās going on in his. Leaving me blind. Not his fault nor do I feel Iām the bad person for how I feel. Iām not ripping aqua men and Iām not a bad selfish person for my current feelings. Each of us are being who we are and some incompatibilities are revealing themselves.
Do I think heās trying to break up with me? Maybe.
Do I think Iām trying to break up with him? Maybe.
I have no ghosting plans, but really just donāt think it warrants a discussion with him. All Iād be saying is I donāt think we should continue a sexual relationship. He claims to have non sexual relationships with a few ladies that he once had sex with so this is normal for him. Plus if you see my past posts, I did overcome a drinking habit which I warned him that the sober version of me takes life more serious where I reprioritize my focus/attention. A truly good reward for me & the man that loves me like a queen
No one said you're a bad person or selfish for wanting to be just one of many vaginas.
I think that's something everyone can relate to. No likes to be or feel "used".
Just wanting a serious commitment instead of fooling around is also very understandable.
I've read the thread. I don't just jump in and ask pointless questions but because I've read it I needed to ask what you meant with "queen", so we are clear of the words meaning you had in mind.
If it's over for you, yeah, just tell him. He might become a bit clingy or annoying but that's his problem.
Thatās what Blocking is for! Problem
Solved.
Until that point everyone deserves to be heard and hey maybe, just maybe, both parties can find a solution for themselves and each other.click to expand
Posted by JadeAlexanderIāve been there albeit briefly and to this day Iām shocked that heās still around.Posted by SeleukosPosted by JadeAlexanderTrue, but only if he goes full Aqua crazy.Posted by SeleukosPosted by rockTennRelax, there is no need to be overly defensive.
I think Iāve nailed whatās killing the hots for me on top of not feeling like a queen. heās way too into picking and analyzing my brain that heās not revealing whatās going on in his. Leaving me blind. Not his fault nor do I feel Iām the bad person for how I feel. Iām not ripping aqua men and Iām not a bad selfish person for my current feelings. Each of us are being who we are and some incompatibilities are revealing themselves.
Do I think heās trying to break up with me? Maybe.
Do I think Iām trying to break up with him? Maybe.
I have no ghosting plans, but really just donāt think it warrants a discussion with him. All Iād be saying is I donāt think we should continue a sexual relationship. He claims to have non sexual relationships with a few ladies that he once had sex with so this is normal for him. Plus if you see my past posts, I did overcome a drinking habit which I warned him that the sober version of me takes life more serious where I reprioritize my focus/attention. A truly good reward for me & the man that loves me like a queen
No one said you're a bad person or selfish for wanting to be just one of many vaginas.
I think that's something everyone can relate to. No likes to be or feel "used".
Just wanting a serious commitment instead of fooling around is also very understandable.
I've read the thread. I don't just jump in and ask pointless questions but because I've read it I needed to ask what you meant with "queen", so we are clear of the words meaning you had in mind.
If it's over for you, yeah, just tell him. He might become a bit clingy or annoying but that's his problem.
Thatās what Blocking is for! Problem
Solved.
Until that point everyone deserves to be heard and hey maybe, just maybe, both parties can find a solution for themselves and each other.
I agree... but if he becomes a problem you donāt have to allow him access.
Although Iām a total clingy stalker and my aqua just lets me... someone should tell him to block my a**
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Posted by SeleukosSorry for coming off as defensive. If anything it was a post you didnāt make that made me want to voice those things. Noticing that on dxp ppl voice generalized thoughts and so I attempt to clarify :-)Posted by rockTennRelax, there is no need to be overly defensive.
I think Iāve nailed whatās killing the hots for me on top of not feeling like a queen. heās way too into picking and analyzing my brain that heās not revealing whatās going on in his. Leaving me blind. Not his fault nor do I feel Iām the bad person for how I feel. Iām not ripping aqua men and Iām not a bad selfish person for my current feelings. Each of us are being who we are and some incompatibilities are revealing themselves.
Do I think heās trying to break up with me? Maybe.
Do I think Iām trying to break up with him? Maybe.
I have no ghosting plans, but really just donāt think it warrants a discussion with him. All Iād be saying is I donāt think we should continue a sexual relationship. He claims to have non sexual relationships with a few ladies that he once had sex with so this is normal for him. Plus if you see my past posts, I did overcome a drinking habit which I warned him that the sober version of me takes life more serious where I reprioritize my focus/attention. A truly good reward for me & the man that loves me like a queen
No one said you're a bad person or selfish for wanting to be just one of many vaginas.
I think that's something everyone can relate to. No likes to be or feel "used".
Just wanting a serious commitment instead of fooling around is also very understandable.
I've read the thread. I don't just jump in and ask pointless questions but because I've read it I needed to ask what you meant with "queen", so we are clear of the words meaning you had in mind.
If it's over for you, yeah, just tell him. He might become a bit clingy or annoying but that's his problem.click to expand
Posted by halalbaeThis is hijacking the topic. Everyone else understood that Iām deciding how best to end things and youāre giving the world famous advice about aqua coldness. If your aqua man went cold on you there are other applicable threads.Posted by SeleukosThats not going cold. Aquas can barely handle their own feels so they back off when it makes them feel uncomfortablePosted by halalbaeNot really.
If an Aquarius is truly good for you and views you as irreplaceable in their life, they will not keep going cold on you
They are not the type to keep you wondering where you stand with them
I can absolutely love someone and still switch from warm and cozy to a brick wall with winter and white walkers all around you.
IME Aquas are very sappy and romantic but not in a hopeless wayclick to expand
Posted by SeleukosI truly like how you think. You ask questions for clarity and understand that perspective is very different than the other person being guilty of something.Posted by halalbaeThis can happen due to a lot of circumstances. Everyone has his own life to live.Posted by SeleukosUnavailability, making them feel unimportantPosted by halalbaeOkay, what would be going cold for you?Posted by SeleukosThats not going cold. Aquas can barely handle their own feels so they back off when it makes them feel uncomfortablePosted by halalbaeNot really.
If an Aquarius is truly good for you and views you as irreplaceable in their life, they will not keep going cold on you
They are not the type to keep you wondering where you stand with them
I can absolutely love someone and still switch from warm and cozy to a brick wall with winter and white walkers all around you.
IME Aquas are very sappy and romantic but not in a hopeless way
"Feelings" are hard to deal with because it's always unclear if it's the other person that makes you feel unimportant or if it's something within yourself that gets triggered by certain situations.
In those cases anybody could go cold for that person.click to expand
If making someone feel unimportant means weāve gone cold then every sign in the zodiac has gone cold frequently
Posted by SeleukosThey get lots of hate. So much that you canāt really get clear advice on them bc so many generalizations are introduced by othersPosted by halalbaeThank you for saying that.
I feel like Aquarius people are pleasers tbh
Which is crazy because of the detached stereotype, but when an Aqua cares? They will give you emotional intimacy. You just have to pick up on the unspoken words and speak the language of gesture
I think it's something that is often overlooked or unseen due to all the hate Aquas seem to get.
Actions always speak louder than words.click to expand
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Ladies fall easily for him.
Doesn't like me or feel .....but this is PARTICULAR to me....generally treats others ok.
It's not something i did. It's just ....
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Ok so long story short, I can safely say that the googley eyed phase is over for me.
I need to understand myself a bit better to identify why...but hey...Iām an Aries so this could just be some typical Aries loss of interest. Trust me, I have my reasons, but can admit that Iām not feeling like a āqueenā in his life and thatās the primary reason.
I want to just be friends now. No kissing, sex, etc. Should I tell him or just let it fade out?