Do Pisces Men like aloof women or the opposite?

I'm a little confused. I have heard that Pisces men like confident women who are aloof. It's like a challenge to them. That's why they are often attracted to older women who have a lot of confidence. But, I'm also hearing that they like women who are "unsure" and maybe needy? Do they like women who aren't as confident and who express to the Pisces men how much they really care about him? Which one is it? For example, if I'm a bit anxious that I haven't heard from a Pisces male friend (who I am in love with), should I send him an email saying I'm just wondering if everything is good with you as I haven't heard from you in awhile or is it better to just play it cool and wait till I hear from him, and when I do act like I didn't notice his absence? Any advice will be appreciated. I am so in love with this man, but I am so confused about his behavior sometimes. I just don't know how to act. I don't know if I should show him how much I really care about him or if I should play the cool, nonchalant, confident girl. I'm a Leo sun, venus virgo, and he is Pisces sun/Pisces moon/Aries in Venus.

Ooops sorry, his moon sign is Aries not Pisces...

Never mind...I'm reading through all the posts and getting valuable insights..yeah you're right Ian, it is pretty vague not knowing the full story with me and Pisces male....

They like REAL women... women unafraid to be themselves, no lying, pretending, or games. DON'T "ACT" with a Pisces, please. He'll see what's underneath anyways, and the fact that you can't be honest with yourself and him about what you're thinking and feeling will be a turn off. She can BE "cool and confident".. but she cannot PLAY "cool and confident"... he will hate the "Should I just play a lil hard to get, act like I didn't even notice him" BS... So. If you feel like emailing him and saying, "Hey, thinking of you, hope you're well" go ahead. Although... women tend to get all twisted up and freaked out about not hearing from a guy for "awhile" and it turns out that it's only been a few days and she's already flipping out. That's going to give off an unmistakably needy, clingy vibe - yes, even in an email. The rest is up in the air, and down to personal preferences.

What you need to do is stop thinking and worrying so much about what this guy is or is not doing. Get busy in YOUR life, do things to make YOU happy, keep you centered. Get SO busy that you don't have the time or energy to expend on something as useless and anxiety-producing as obsessing about some guy not calling. If you spend so much time and energy on all this mental round and round about him, it's going to come across as needy and insecure to him whenever you DO see/talk/write/text him. I've said it many times - a man wants to be PART of a wonderful woman's life, but NOT the CENTER of it. Love yourself, love your life, don't put so much energy into worrying about him & if he's going to call... do it for real, and the rest falls into place when your "vibe" shifts and draws him in.

Also, his Aries Venus (and Moon) should make him plenty self-assertive in emotions/relationships. If he's NOT pursuing you, then he's generally NOT interested, and you pushing yourself on him probably won't go very well. He's probably a manly man, and wouldn't like having roles reversed on him and becoming the "prey". Most men don't.

(I'll give you a little P.S. here... Pisces and Leo are generally considered a very difficult match, esp without A LOT of favorable placements in other planets. You've pretty much got an uphill battle here and you'll probably make better friends than romantic partners, just so you know.)

Here we go...but I'm afraid you may be disappointed or "disgusted"...but alas, it's the truth: I met this Pisces man via work in 2006. I was married in 2005 (everything perfect except no passion in the relationship). At first, I didn't pay attention to the Pisces man as he is pretty much an executive at work, 10 years older, and I felt intimidated. He is in a common-law relationship with a woman 13 years older than him. He's 43, she's 55. Anyways, in Nov 2007, I noticed Pisces man always giving me these looks, shy glances at first and then more assertive looks . At this point, we probably only exchanged 2 words to each other. One time I was walking across the room and he just stood and gave me this intense look and I met his eyes and he wouldn't look away. I was surprised. I looked away and then looked up again and he was still staring. It was I who had to look away all flushed. This went on for about a month. Then one time in the elevator, he started a conversation. The chemistry between us was unreal. I was nervous as I haven't felt chemistry like that with any guy since high school. I am married to a wonderful man. The only thing lacking in the relationship is passion. Before this Pisces male came to the picture, I was vaguely aware of the lack of passion in my marriage but I did not care. Anyways, after the elevator, I sent him an email asking him a question pertaining to the conversation we had, the rest is history. He replied to my email very enthusiastically and after that he would send me about 30-50 emails a day. I was overwhelmed with the attention and felt flattered. He is an extremely intelligent man. I also liked the fact that although he is an executive, he kept to himself and did not play cheesy office politics. We went out for drinks, the chemistry was intense and we kissed. I felt guilty and to make a long story short, I separated from my husband. During this period, Mr. Pisces and I got to know each other and I fell in love. The problem was his wife of course. Yes, I am aware that I will be judged. I told him that I loved him and that I want him to leave her. He said he was confused. I asked him if he was in love with her and he said "I don't know about being in love with her, but I do love her. We have been together for almost 20 years and she has put up with a lot of my shit." I do know he loves her. He would kiss me and then stop and says he has to go. One time, he even got all teary eyed and said he fe

One time, he even got all teary eyed and said he felt so guilty. I stopped talking to him then he would pull me back in. Finally, we both decided that we have to stop kissing each other but we will be friends. So this friend thing between us with feelings and chemistry have been going on since March 2008. We've had a lot of drama, mainly with me getting mad at him for stupid things (because deep down I'm just hurt that he did not leave his wife). He would be so nice when I'm mad, always explaining, always patient with me, and always trying to make sure I stay in his life. In the meantime, my husband and I ended up working things out. My husband knows that I left because I fell in love with another man. I've made several attempts to stop talking to Mr. Pisces. I have failed time and again. I am just so in love with him. I feel he is my soul mate but I can't hurt my husband again and Mr. Pisces won't leave his wife. I understand Mr. Pisces. He is loyal to her, loves her and doesn't want to hurt her. But still, we can't get rid of each other. He has been there for me emotionally through some very hard times and vice versa. I don't know what to do. I'm in the process of trying to accept that we can never be together, just love him and be his friend, be thankful that he has a woman who loves him and takes care of him (because I'm not available anyway), but it is extremely painful. I feel he is very confused too. Sometimes, when we get too close emotionally, he would disappear for a few days, keep me at a distance. Then if I hint that maybe we should just never speak anymore, he would come back and pull me back in. Recently, I stopped talking to him for 2 months. Another failed attempt. I missed him and emailed him. We met for lunch and I gave him an onyx fish stone for his desk. Being casual with him sucks but we are just suppose to be friends so I can't exactly just pour my heart out. I cry almost every night because I am so in love with him and I just don't know what to do about it.

You KNOW what you have to do, you just won't do it 😢

I won't judge you on what you've done (though others might come in here, guns ablazin') but YOU know deep down what you've done is not good, especially for YOU. It's tearing you apart, emotionally destroying you. Honey.. let me ask you... do you want another 5, 10, 20 years of this? Because this is all you're going to get... he WON'T leave his "wife" and you know this. What makes you SO attracted to this unavailable man? Why not a man who is available and READY to give you SO much love that you need never feel so off-balance, insecure, unsure, guilty, and not good enough? Why would you want a man who would cheat? Even if he left her for you, there's absolutely NO guarantee he'd remain faithful to you when the next temptation came by. Why do this to yourself? I'll tell you why... it's YOU. There's something broken inside you, something that makes YOU cling to a man you cannot have, a man who is NOT GOOD FOR YOU. A woman who is secure, loves herself, knows what she wants and won't settle for crumbs.. she'd have never gotten this far.. her "attraction" for this man would have disappeared as soon as she found out he was unavailable. Toxic. You're Toxic and addicted. To the mess, to the drama, to this off-balance feeling that feels like love and excitement and passion to you - in comparison, your husband seems boring, not exciting, not as fun. Lots of women are like this. But only YOU can fix YOU. I'm going to email you a link. Do with it what you will.

A couple questions.


1. For these two years, or however long it's actually been that the two of you have been sharing intimate conversations at work ... does anybody at the office know, or have inklings that something is going on between the two of you. Or, has been closely guarded and kept a successful secret for all this time.

2. At work, at social functions, like company parties (christmas and summer picnics) ... how does the interaction go between you two when the spouses are there? Or how do you two interact with each others spouses?

3. You said your husband knows .. BUT, does he know it's a man at work, to whom you see everyday?

4. Have you two gone further physically then just kissing?

5. Now that you and husband are back together, have you addressed your issues with him? You said that he knows it was because of another man .. but, that is actually not the truth. The other man is an effect, the cause was a lack of something on husbands part in which you were being neglected of.


If you had been recieving from husband instead of lacking, then chances are this whole situation wouldn't even exist.

Do you realize that ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

So, does husband know this? Or, does he just know that another man is in your life?

And I disagree with you Nefer .. I don't think she is broken .. I think her marriage is broken.


It's not uncommon for people to become disillusioned and confused when their relationship is in trouble .... it's common for people to think they are in love with a Rebounder.


And 99% of the time, they've no clue it's even a rebound .. they think they are in love.


And this appears to be the case .. this lady left her husband (emotionally) a long time ago, but, because she is still with husband, she needs an avenue in which to use as an escape route to get out.


And I think you should use it. I think the first guy who tells you to move in with him .. you should pack your bags ASAP. It won't last, it would be doomed to fail from jump .. but, the thing is, you would have gotten out, you would have let yourself continue living ... you would have used the key you're holding to free yourself from the chains you wear.

Whatever it takes, no matter the cost .. even if it means you have to fuck a guy you don't even like .... you HAVE to get out of your marriage ASAP.


The reason why two years have gone by and you are still attached to this guy is because you are still in a marriage that's finished and because you are a female ... you HAVE to emotional support, emotional love/nourishment, and so you are dependent upon this love you have for this man because you have to, or you'll go crazy.

But, it's all a dream.


ONce you get out, and get on with your life .. you will find out that you are no longer dependent upon this love you think you have. You will then be able to be free.

So... this man has been cheating on his wife, bouncing back and forth for over 2 years with this woman... and now he's an ANGEL?

Why... because he's a Pisces?

Now THAT'S some crazy assed logic!

Posted by Nefer
You KNOW what you have to do, you just won't do it 😢

I won't judge you on what you've done (though others might come in here, guns ablazin') but YOU know deep down what you've done is not good, especially for YOU. It's tearing you apart, emotionally destroying you. Honey.. let me ask you... do you want another 5, 10, 20 years of this? Because this is all you're going to get... he WON'T leave his "wife" and you know this. What makes you SO attracted to this unavailable man?

Nefer, thank you for not judging. I didn't ask to fall in love with him. I know I made a mistake for even going out with him that first time. It was a domino effect after that. Because of the guilt, I separated from my husband, moved out on my own to the shock of all friends and family. They all thought we had a great relationship. My husband is the kindest man and he has been there for me through everything as well as me with him. I love him, but the truth is, I'm not in love with him. We probably have sex once a year. My close bestfriends who I've confided in, are surprised because my husband is quite the looker. And they do not think Mr. Pisces come close in attractiveness. But, of course, it's all about the soul connection. The thing is before Mr. Pisces, I didn't care about sex at all. Then comes Mr. Pisces and it's like I was introduced to this whole other world that I have forgotten. But to answer your question, No I don't want 5, 10, 20 years of this. I wish I can stop loving Mr. Pisces and just plainly be friends with him.

Posted by Nefer
Why not a man who is available and READY to give you SO much love that you need never feel so off-balance, insecure, unsure, guilty, and not good enough?

click to expand

Yes, Nefer, this man you speak of is my husband. I have the utmost respect for this wonderful man. He loves me, he is a kind man who I don't deserve.

Posted by Nefer
You KNOW what you have to do, you just won't do it 😢

Why would you want a man who would cheat? Even if he left her for you, there's absolutely NO guarantee he'd remain faithful to you when the next temptation came by. Why do this to yourself? I'll tell you why... it's YOU. There's something broken inside you, something that makes YOU cling to a man you cannot have, a man who is NOT GOOD FOR YOU. A woman who is secure, loves herself, knows what she wants and won't settle for crumbs.. she'd have never gotten this far.. her "attraction" for this man would have disappeared as soon as she found out he was unavailable. Toxic. You're Toxic and addicted. To the mess, to the drama, to this off-balance feeling that feels like love and excitement and passion to you - in comparison, your husband seems boring, not exciting, not as fun. Lots of women are like this. But only YOU can fix YOU. I'm going to email you a link. Do with it what you will.

Yes, maybe you are right about me being broken. And you are definitely right about me being addicted. I've come to realize that I'm addicted to the attention he gives me. The 30-50 emails a day, the fact that when I'm mad, he is so patient, his efforts to make sure he doesn't lose me are intoxicating. I'm ashamed to admit it, but it's true. The thing is, I do get a lot of male attention, but I've never felt like this before. I certainly never felt tempted to stray from my wonderful husband before Mr. Pisces came along. This fact probably magnified the effect Mr. Pisces had on me - the fact that I do get quite a bit of male attention but have shrugged it off etc. I've always thought I was married to Mr. Perfect. Then BAM Mr. Pisces comes along and turns my world upside down.

Posted by P-Angel
A couple questions.

1. For these two years, or however long it's actually been that the two of you have been sharing intimate conversations at work ... does anybody at the office know, or have inklings that something is going on between the two of you. Or, has been closely guarded and kept a successful secret for all this time.

It has been closely guarded. We communicate via email mostly. I haven't work there for over a year now though (which is good for me). It was stressful to see him everyday. The glances, looks, were too much. It's great to have some distance now and it has helped me mellow out a bit.

Posted by P-Angel
2. At work, at social functions, like company parties (christmas and summer picnics) ... how does the interaction go between you two when the spouses are there? Or how do you two interact with each others spouses?

He doesn't bring his wife to company parties. I only met her once and this was before anything has started between Mr. Pisces and I. She's an older lady, very corporate and high maintenance, looks snobby, rich, but not a great beauty. As for my husband, the same thing. The only time they've seen each other is before anything started between us.

Posted by P-Angel
3. You said your husband knows .. BUT, does he know it's a man at work, to whom you see everyday?

click to expand

Yes, he knows it's a man at work. My husband actually used to work at the same company but they didnt' really know each other/interact. My husband also is not the very jealous type. When I told him that I don't speak to him anymore, he believed me and hardly asks anything about Mr. Pisces or the situation. It's like as if he just wants to forget that this ever happened.

I knew you were talking about the rebound man, in general, SG.

Posted by P-Angel
4. Have you two gone further physically then just kissing?

When I was separated, we made out, but no sex. And when we made out, he stops because he feels guilty because of his wife, and he leaves dramatically. I just don't get why he just won't cut me off. I can't cut him off. But, if he cuts me off, it would make it easier as I won't beg him to stay. Whenever I made an attempt to end our connection by getting mad at him for something, he would put all his efforts into keeping me in his life. I don't know if this means because he cares for me or maybe this is just a Pisces thing? It would be so much easier if he didn't try.

Posted by P-Angel
5. Now that you and husband are back together, have you addressed your issues with him? You said that he knows it was because of another man .. but, that is actually not the truth. The other man is an effect, the cause was a lack of something on husbands part in which you were being neglected of. If you had been recieving from husband instead of lacking, then chances are this whole situation wouldn't even exist. Do you realize that ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ So, does husband know this? Or, does he just know that another man is in your life?

click to expand

Yes, you are correct and friends have pointed that out. We tried to put efforts into making love, but the passion just isn't there. We are more like bestfriends. I love him but it's more like familial love. Can marriages like this survive or is the passion integral?

Posted by buttercupSG

it is not fair to your husband. he deserve a wife who truly feel passionate who is attracted to him. you are taking away his chance to have someone who can truly make him happy. leave him.

You make a good point. This isn't just about her ... so long as she holds onto the husband, the longer his life is put on hold because she's too afraid to face her reality.

He also deserves to have a person who loves him.

Posted by MegStings
I rolled my eyes so hard they are stuck in the back of my head.

LMAO...touche

Damn, wrong .. hopefully you didn't read that .. it was intended for someone else.

Posted by leolei


We tried to put efforts into making love, but the passion just isn't there. We are more like bestfriends. I love him but it's more like familial love. Can marriages like this survive or is the passion integral?

Yes, they can indeed survive. Thing is though, a sexless marriage has to be mutual. If one still yearns or still feels like they are missing a huge part of their life, then it won't survive, I'm afraid. Quite the opposite, it will rot .. next thing you know, you hate each other. 😢

This Pisces man, what you feel for him isn't real .. no matter how much you think you're in love with him. You convince yourself that something is there to make yourself believe you are lovable, to convince yourself that you are desirable.



This is all about the passion you lack .. all of it, and nothing more.

This is a fantasy you weave, to blind yourself, so you won't go mad.

Posted by P-Angel
This Pisces man, what you feel for him isn't real .. no matter how much you think you're in love with him. You convince yourself that something is there to make yourself believe you are lovable, to convince yourself that you are desirable.


This is all about the passion you lack .. all of it, and nothing more.

This is a fantasy you weave, to blind yourself, so you won't go mad.

Hence, my statement that she's broken. I did not mean broken in an insulting, hurtful way.. did not mean UNFIXABLE.. just broken, like many, many people are. (You and me too, P - just in different ways than she is!) And it's on HER to fix her brokenness, because no one else can, not even Mr. Pisces.


Also, leolei surviving a passionless marriage only works if it's mutual, like P said. But as for your passionless marriage... it's not ONLY about the lack of sex.. the lack of sex is triggered by something much, much bigger. Intimacy and connection (something you've been cultivating with Pisces) is WAY more important than sex, and in fact triggers satisfying sex. Sex without intimacy and connection becomes a mind-numbing duty, as well you know. Trying to have MORE (a quantity thing) sex with your husband (or adventurous or kinky or whatever)... that will not address the underlying issue... the lack of intimacy and connection (a quality thing). So once more, we're back to YOU and what YOU can do. Start working on YOU, the inside that makes you not believe you deserve this wonderful husband, and makes you cling to a man you cannot have who is TOXIC to you... perhaps you will CREATE intimacy and connection in your marriage, finally. Perhaps you will not, and will have to leave, to continue working on YOU.. and eventually finding what you truly want.

But I agree with P.. it's not the Pisces, and it's not love with him. It's addiction to the drama and the high that FEELS exciting and passionate and like falling in love to you. But you are not yet at a place where you can see and FEEL the truth of that statement, and can't imagine not loving this Pisces. Yet.

Oh, he's cold alright. Look what he's doing to a woman who's been there for him for nearly two decades. Talk about having his cake and eating it too! Maybe not sex (yet) but certainly, this is an emotional affair, and SOOO destructive. Which to me personally is a MUCH worse betrayal. I simply could not WANT a man who is capable of such atrocities -- would not allow myself to be in the position of him committing these acts upon ME. Any man who would do more than harmless flirting with another woman... nope, zip, zero, zilch on the attraction. Taken men do not appeal to me.. but then again, betraying my own commitments does not appeal to me, either. But I'm not broken in this way... I have other faults and foibles, but not this one.

no offense but this is BS.

leos want what they can't have. i have a leo admirer who claimed i was "the one." after he was married, he would call me whenever he had trouble with his wife, he'd call and lament having never gotten to be with me. he says things like, he's always envisioned us growing old together. he still says i love you. did i mention this has been going on over 10 years?

i feel it was far less about me and more about what he idealized me to be. what i represented...the one who got away.

this chick is living in a fantasy world. it's a nice escape. leos love love. they love fairy tales. they have trouble dealing with REAL when it comes to love and relationships.

so i would feel sorry for her if i didn't think she was completely full of shit.

to answer the ORIGINAL question... lmao...

i think we're 'attracted' to the confident and cool women but... when it comes down to it we want them to be emotional and needy/clingy. we want both basically. there can be a balance. just not TOO needy obviously.

Posted by buttercupSG
you set yourself for failure for emotional affairs by marrying someone you don't have a passion for.

get out now like many said already because i can guarantee you you will have many more emotional affairs if you stay. it is not fair to your husband. he deserve a wife who truly feel passionate who is attracted to him. you are taking away his chance to have someone who can truly make him happy. leave him.

I'm afraid to hurt him and I don't want to leave him. I do love him. What I want is to get over my feelings about Mr. Pisces. My husband is happy with me. We are very close and have been there for each other. We married in 2005 but have been dating since 1999. The thing is, we are very affectionate with each other. Lots of hugs and kisses, just not sex. And it's not just on my part. It's not as if he initiates sex, it's not a problem for him if we don't do it at all. It's not an issue to him at all and he is very happy with our life and with me. I do love him and have been there for him through the most difficult times. The love is there, just no passion. Again, what I truly want is to get over Mr. Pisces. I wish he wasn't in my heart and I am working on getting over him.

Posted by buttercupSG
sorry to be harsh but "Then BAM Mr. Pisces comes along and turns my world upside down." was BS. it was not BAM like what a surprise. you set youself up for failure by following your head not your heart.


oh well. only you can change your future. who do i care lol. best of luck.

No worries, you are not harsh. But no, it's not BS. I get a lot of male attention, but never reacted to them like I did with Mr. Pisces, hence "BAM", what a surprise. And I do love my husband. He has all the qualities in the scoreboard that one can tick off yes, but I love him for all of that.

Posted by P-Angel

Posted by leolei


We tried to put efforts into making love, but the passion just isn't there. We are more like bestfriends. I love him but it's more like familial love. Can marriages like this survive or is the passion integral?

Yes, they can indeed survive. Thing is though, a sexless marriage has to be mutual. If one still yearns or still feels like they are missing a huge part of their life, then it won't survive, I'm afraid. Quite the opposite, it will rot .. next thing you know, you hate each other. 😢

click to expand

Ok, so it can survive. It is mutual. We both aren't into having sex with each other. We are both very affectionate (lots of hugs, kisses, cuddling, cute names for each other) but no passion. I do wish I can have passion but I don't want to hurt my husband because of this wish. I want to get over it and go back to before when I didn't care about sex. And I'm trying to get over Mr. Pisces. Before him, I didn't care nor thought it was an issue that my husband and I only had sex twice a year maybe.

Posted by P-Angel
This Pisces man, what you feel for him isn't real .. no matter how much you think you're in love with him. You convince yourself that something is there to make yourself believe you are lovable, to convince yourself that you are desirable.

This is all about the passion you lack .. all of it, and nothing more.

This is a fantasy you weave, to blind yourself, so you won't go mad.

But P-Angel, why Mr. Pisces? I get A LOT of male attention. I know that I'm desirable to men. If it's just a matter of validation that I'm desirable, why didn't I fall for all the other guys who found me desirable, etc? I'm not in the slightest bit tempted to go for all the other guys. Even when I was separated from my husband, two other men have aggressively pursued me, but I was not at all interested. My bestfriend thought I was crazy because I guess by society's standards, these other 2 men were more of a "catch" than Mr. Pisces.

Posted by Nefer


Hence, my statement that she's broken. I did not mean broken in an insulting, hurtful way.. did not mean UNFIXABLE.. just broken, like many, many people are. (You and me too, P - just in different ways than she is!) And it's on HER to fix her brokenness, because no one else can, not even Mr. Pisces.


Also, leolei surviving a passionless marriage only works if it's mutual, like P said. But as for your passionless marriage... it's not ONLY about the lack of sex.. the lack of sex is triggered by something much, much bigger. Intimacy and connection (something you've been cultivating with Pisces) is WAY more important than sex, and in fact triggers satisfying sex. Sex without intimacy and connection becomes a mind-numbing duty, as well you know. Trying to have MORE (a quantity thing) sex with your husband (or adventurous or kinky or whatever)... that will not address the underlying issue... the lack of intimacy and connection (a quality thing). So once more, we're back to YOU and what YOU can do. Start working on YOU, the inside that makes you not believe you deserve this wonderful husband, and makes you cling to a man you cannot have who is TOXIC to you... perhaps you will CREATE intimacy and connection in your marriage, finally. Perhaps you will not, and will have to leave, to continue working on YOU.. and eventually finding what you truly want.

But I agree with P.. it's not the Pisces, and it's not love with him. It's addiction to the drama and the high that FEELS exciting and passionate and like falling in love to you. But you are not yet at a place where you can see and FEEL the truth of that statement, and can't imagine not loving this Pisces. Yet.

Thank you for your insights Nefer. I think you are absolutely right. This is about me being broken and the addiction to the drama and high with Mr. Pisces. Thanks for the link as well, I will check it out. I'm taking all of this in.

Posted by Nefer
Oh, he's cold alright. Look what he's doing to a woman who's been there for him for nearly two decades. Talk about having his cake and eating it too! Maybe not sex (yet) but certainly, this is an emotional affair, and SOOO destructive. Which to me personally is a MUCH worse betrayal. I simply could not WANT a man who is capable of such atrocities -- would not allow myself to be in the position of him committing these acts upon ME. Any man who would do more than harmless flirting with another woman... nope, zip, zero, zilch on the attraction. Taken men do not appeal to me.. but then again, betraying my own commitments does not appeal to me, either. But I'm not broken in this way... I have other faults and foibles, but not this one.

Nefer, can it be that Mr. Pisces is not a "bastard" and just conflicted? He could have had sex with me a long time ago, but he hasn't done this. If it was having his cake and eating it too, he would have taken advantage on this front don't you think? What is he doing with me I don't know. Also, whenever we made out before, he would stop it, sometimes would get all teary eyed about the guilt regarding his wife, then leave. I have never seen a man act like this. And yes, I am broken and so is Mr. Pisces, but I don't think he is a bastard.

Posted by Asleep
1. Do you enjoy being played with? You must.

Can you elaborate how Mr. Pisces is playing with me? I honestly want to hear it. And no, I don't think anyone enjoys being played with.

Get your head right lady, for your own sake.

Posted by tubbyscubby
no offense but this is BS.

leos want what they can't have. i have a leo admirer who claimed i was "the one." after he was married, he would call me whenever he had trouble with his wife, he'd call and lament having never gotten to be with me. he says things like, he's always envisioned us growing old together. he still says i love you. did i mention this has been going on over 10 years?

i feel it was far less about me and more about what he idealized me to be. what i represented...the one who got away.

this chick is living in a fantasy world. it's a nice escape. leos love love. they love fairy tales. they have trouble dealing with REAL when it comes to love and relationships.

so i would feel sorry for her if i didn't think she was completely full of shit.

I wasn't having troubles with my husband when Mr. Pisces came along. But you're right about the idealization part. Maybe, I have idealized Mr. Pisces.

What do you mean I'm full of shit? I'm just being completely honest about my feelings. I'm not bullshitting anything or anyone.

Posted by xr0yc3x
to answer the ORIGINAL question... lmao...

i think we're 'attracted' to the confident and cool women but... when it comes down to it we want them to be emotional and needy/clingy. we want both basically. there can be a balance. just not TOO needy obviously.

Thanks...lol

Posted by venusianbull


Get your head right lady, for your own sake.

I'm trying. Thanks.

I know it's hard going when a man has you twisted up inside, but I'm pulling for you. Be strong.

Posted by ianthefish
you are just a pussy to chase around the yard....

for the mere enjoyment of him...

this is all you will be to him....

im the bastard pisces...

when you shall fall for the last time, he wont be there to pick you up...

but you are to dense to get this or him... wrapped up in yourself, and the image of yourself that you have worked so hard on creating..

Wow, you're quite judgmental. Nice.

He's quite honest leo. It's a warning for what could be. Pay attention to the man, he gives good advice.

^i agree with the fish. ian is definitely a bastard.

@leo, i say you're full of it because based on my knowledge of your sign, it's about the conquest. yes, you do feel for him but it's rooted in fantasy and denial of affection. leo's want what they cant have and the more the object of their desire is out of reach, the more they idealize and fantasize.

the pisces is a prize to be won and the more he pushes and pulls, the more you become enraptured. but the moment he becomes real, the moment he does as ian has suggested or farts or picks his nose or turns out to be terrible in the sack, the quicker the fantasy stops coming up roses.

i feel bad for you because you honestly believe this is what you want...that he is what you want. i personally don't think you want him in the manner you suggest. i think you want to fulfill the fantasy...the romance. you want the two of you to come together in some blissful "love."

when you can get real, you will stop letting your heart and your heart alone lead you. you will THINK and realize that this is a married man, you are a married woman and what you're doing is wrong...all day, everyday.

if you weren't so selfish and self-absorbed, if you had any depth of character and willingness to see that REAL love resides within the four walls of your own home, you deserve to wallow in self-pity. you married your husband for a reason and either that relationship is dead or you're doing everything in your power to kill it. hubby became real and now you're in search of a fantasy.

it's sad, it's pitiful and that is why you're full of shit.

Besides, would you want to put all your ducks in one room? Putting your heart on the line for a 'maybe'? What if he swims away and you're left with nothing. Turn your eyes towards husband, the man you promised to love and stand by. And that's not judgement lady, that's what I believe in.

it's not judgment or your opinion VB...it's common fucking sense.

YOU ARE MARRIED!!! wtf— and he still wants you?

she's attracted to the pisces cause he's an "executive." what is hubby? leos also go after status...typical fake ass shit.

True tubby, it is common sense. At least it is in my world. And I couldn't care less if a man is ditch digger or King. If that is who you stood up for and promised on your heart to be with, then that's your man. Be proud to stand beside him. I won't get up on a soapbox about this, because you'd all be here for bloody days falling asleep in your breakfast beverage, but SHEESH.

what is hubby's sign?

Posted by ianthefish
you are just a pussy to chase around the yard....

for the mere enjoyment of him...

this is all you will be to him....

im the bastard pisces...

when you shall fall for the last time, he wont be there to pick you up...

but you are to dense to get this or him... wrapped up in yourself, and the image of yourself that you have worked so hard on creating..

I don't know what you mean about the image of myself that I have worked so hard on creating. I could swallow your harshness more if I understood what you're basing these on.

Posted by tubbyscubby
^i agree with the fish. ian is definitely a bastard.

@leo, i say you're full of it because based on my knowledge of your sign, it's about the conquest. yes, you do feel for him but it's rooted in fantasy and denial of affection. leo's want what they cant have and the more the object of their desire is out of reach, the more they idealize and fantasize.

the pisces is a prize to be won and the more he pushes and pulls, the more you become enraptured. but the moment he becomes real, the moment he does as ian has suggested or farts or picks his nose or turns out to be terrible in the sack, the quicker the fantasy stops coming up roses.

i feel bad for you because you honestly believe this is what you want...that he is what you want. i personally don't think you want him in the manner you suggest. i think you want to fulfill the fantasy...the romance. you want the two of you to come together in some blissful "love."

when you can get real, you will stop letting your heart and your heart alone lead you. you will THINK and realize that this is a married man, you are a married woman and what you're doing is wrong...all day, everyday.

if you weren't so selfish and self-absorbed, if you had any depth of character and willingness to see that REAL love resides within the four walls of your own home, you deserve to wallow in self-pity. you married your husband for a reason and either that relationship is dead or you're doing everything in your power to kill it. hubby became real and now you're in search of a fantasy.

it's sad, it's pitiful and that is why you're full of shit.

OUCH. But, I appreciate your insight. I actually agree with you 100% . Thanks.

Posted by Asleep
I highly doubt this fish will leave his wife of 20yrs for you...
The point is..stop entertaining whatever image your mind is painting, for your sake alone. You are so worried about this fish, when your husband took you back after openly admitting to falling in love with another man. You placed his as second place...most men will not, or ever accept that. I suspect the damage of your choice has yet to be seen.

How he feels isnt relevant however..as he is not posting. For YOUR sake, stop entertaining this fish..and seek help with your marriage. You love him? Check. No serious arguement or issues? Check.....but something is lacking...and from the image being painted..I suspect the issue is within the bedroom itself...and not whatever fabrication you have created to justify.

I don't think he will leave his wife either. I've realized that a long time ago. The issue is I want to get over him. I want to stop thinking and crying over him. And yes, I agree with you about my husband. I don't deserve him and I should thank my lucky stars that he actually wanted me back after I told him I fell in love with another man. But, what fabrication are you talking about? I'm not rejecting my husband in the bedroom. He is not initiating and neither am I. It's been like this for 8 years. I've suggested that we see a marriage counselor but he said he didn't want to spill his guts to a stranger and he doesn't think we need to see one. That's fine, I don't need to have sex. It's not crucial and it was a none issue until Mr. Pisces came along. That's when the lack of passion in my life came charging to the forefront of my consciousness. I guess what I want is to get over Mr. Pisces that's it! So, from this board, I think the best solution is to just cut him off for good. I've tried this many times and failed. I guess I will have to keep trying until I succeed.

Posted by ianthefish
im not judging you at all... im sure you are surprised to hear me say that i actually like you... you are real, which is what i am being...

if you choose to keep your eyes closed, then that is again all your doing...

Ok, that's cool. I'm just very sensitive. Thanks.

Posted by venusianbull
Besides, would you want to put all your ducks in one room? Putting your heart on the line for a 'maybe'? What if he swims away and you're left with nothing. Turn your eyes towards husband, the man you promised to love and stand by. And that's not judgement lady, that's what I believe in.

No,no,no. You misunderstood. I don't think he will ever leave his wife for me. What I want is to get over my feelings for him. And yes, I agree with you about my husband. You see I feel (yes, you guys disagree) that I'm in love with Mr. Pisces. It's very hard to cut him off. Very painful. I thought we could be friends but the feelings won't go away. I find myself keep analyzing his confusing behaviour. I get obsessed with this and it has to stop. I guess I have no choice but to just cut him off for good. I don't want to hurt him as he wants me in his life as a friend. But, I just can't do it anymore.

Posted by tubbyscubby
it's not judgment or your opinion VB...it's common fucking sense.

YOU ARE MARRIED!!! wtf— and he still wants you?

she's attracted to the pisces cause he's an "executive." what is hubby? leos also go after status...typical fake ass shit.

EXCUSE ME, but you are fucking dead wrong about that!!! I am not attracted to Mr. Pisces because he is an "executive". Quite the opposite. I abhor people who are into status and titles. I am attracted to Mr. Pisces because I have a deep connection with him emotionally, mentally and physically. He has a beautiful, sensitive soul. He is an intelligent man and very kind and patient. He is not the typical executive. As a matter of fact, in the beginning, I paid him no attention because he was an "executive" and I thought he might be the typical, cocky, Wall street type. He is the opposite. And you are dead wrong in your presumptions tubbyscubby!