SelenaKyle
@justagirl
12 Years25,000+ Posts
Comments: 6657 · Posts: 25221 · Topics: 77
Message Board Big Brother (Page 13)
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Posted by _DazedPosted by Nykkjen
Hey Dazed! Another name I know! I hope you've been well brother.
I'm good. Just doin my thing.
What brought you back?click to expand
Just curiosity maybe? Dxp is a strange forum. There is a lot more here than just astrology. I don't know really, I guess its part curiosity and part nostalgia.
Posted by HippeeGemPosted by AfternoonDelights22Posted by Nykkjen
I'm kind of amazed that after all these years, Afternoon has kept this going ~
idk who you are but kill me, please
xD
I forbid you to die ok thanks
. It is my birthday so you have to honor that🙏🙏click to expand
Well Im still alive for now, but finding time to finish the last episodes may kill me.
Happy Birthday!!!!!!
Posted by MissScruffs
My vote is for Stubbs
What are the odds?
I'll take him.. 150 dxp points at 100:1
Posted by HippeeGemPosted by AfternoonDelights22Posted by Nykkjen
I'm kind of amazed that after all these years, Afternoon has kept this going ~
idk who you are but kill me, please
xD
I forbid you to die ok thanks
. It is my birthday so you have to honor that🙏🙏click to expand
Happy birthday turtle
Posted by HippeeGemPosted by AfternoonDelights22Posted by Nykkjen
I'm kind of amazed that after all these years, Afternoon has kept this going ~
idk who you are but kill me, please
xD
I forbid you to die ok thanks
. It is my birthday so you have to honor that🙏🙏click to expand
Happy Birthday Hippee! 🤗
Posted by UnusualVaginalDischarge
Who was the sponsor for the big brother points?
Has to be Nights.
*that moment you realize you invested $ 12 in a dud like dxp*
Anyone else noticed the major decline in views since I left the game 🙂
I smell a backdoor
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL
Yodi has to use her veto this week, right?
Champ puts up UVD.
@Yodi uses the Secret Veto on UVD
Champ has to put up PR.
Split up the power couple!
Champ puts up UVD.
@Yodi uses the Secret Veto on UVD
Champ has to put up PR.
Split up the power couple!
YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
🍿🍿🍿🍿
I was not going to respond to any of the comments on here because I’m not interested in ruining the thread by going back and forth with anyone and especially when I attempted to come to both Dazed and Elle post game to address this privately. However I am getting sick and tired of continuously having things thrown out in this thread about me to suit certain people’s narrative. I get it, you have a little heat in your bellies over what you believe and think my intentions were, so I let you rant and throw your shots for several pages without interruption. I chose to handle this in a mature way---and to be very clear, Dazed I did not come to you or Elle post game to spin anything through PM as you are trying to present in this thread. When I became aware that I was being blamed for intentionally trying to ruin your friendship to win a game I attempted to address it with both Elle and Dazed to clear things up. Especially after finally calming a bit myself, reviewing what took place, how I interpreted it and owning that I let my emotions take over.
However after reading some of Elle and Dazed’s responses both in their DRs and in this thread, I’m over it. Let’s get something perfectly clear, I no longer give a rat’s a** if either of you choose to believe me or not. Not what my following posts are going to be about. You’re both hell bent on believing something about me that isn’t true, so sit in that and stew. I have no plans to go back and forth for rounds and rounds after I have stated what I need to post here either. My moon doesn’t have the patience or the f*cks to give to use my energy that way. I am also sure it would be exhausting for people to read. However, what I am not going to do is allow Dazed and Elle to continue to paint a picture about who I am and what I have done based on (clearly) a misunderstanding, or let them retell what happened based on their perspective when this whole situation is really a lot of bullsh*t that got out of control. You’re continuing to twist every little thing I say in my DRs without context, filtered through your saltiness is tiresome, so I don’t plan to read or watch much more.
Also, to be crystal clear when I first approached Dazed and Elle, post game after the webisodes started to air I was not aware that I was also being blamed for Elle blocking Dazed on FB before the nominations were announced (or so he says), because the timeline was off so I did not address it in my vocaroo PM (which was sent btw because I could not use my hands to type out everything I had to say, but I wanted to address this sooner than later---noted, I should of just said f*ck it and not bother since that was just used as another reason to have my name in your mouth). I can’t address something I have no idea I somehow played a part of now can I?—but according to you, it’s me “spinning” because I didn’t address it in my vocaroo. Okay.
Anyway, heads up I will not be including any SS that I did not author (scared trust after all), is not relevant to the issues to the actual beef, was not posted on the game board and therefore public knowledge or if it mentions anyone’s name that has nothing to do with this.
*Disclaimer: I swear I do not usually keep 3 month old messages. 90% of them were deleted, I’ve just been traveling and I had other RL stuff going on that I never got around to deleting all of my messages.
Before I begin, I will state I make absolutely no apologies for the number of long a** posts that are about to follow (and there will be a lot….today, I got time cuz). Especially since Dazed and Elle felt the need to go 50+ pages deep with me constantly in their mouths. Unfortunately, I didn’t come with any salt, so I hope I taste good on your tongues all the same.
However after reading some of Elle and Dazed’s responses both in their DRs and in this thread, I’m over it. Let’s get something perfectly clear, I no longer give a rat’s a** if either of you choose to believe me or not. Not what my following posts are going to be about. You’re both hell bent on believing something about me that isn’t true, so sit in that and stew. I have no plans to go back and forth for rounds and rounds after I have stated what I need to post here either. My moon doesn’t have the patience or the f*cks to give to use my energy that way. I am also sure it would be exhausting for people to read. However, what I am not going to do is allow Dazed and Elle to continue to paint a picture about who I am and what I have done based on (clearly) a misunderstanding, or let them retell what happened based on their perspective when this whole situation is really a lot of bullsh*t that got out of control. You’re continuing to twist every little thing I say in my DRs without context, filtered through your saltiness is tiresome, so I don’t plan to read or watch much more.
Also, to be crystal clear when I first approached Dazed and Elle, post game after the webisodes started to air I was not aware that I was also being blamed for Elle blocking Dazed on FB before the nominations were announced (or so he says), because the timeline was off so I did not address it in my vocaroo PM (which was sent btw because I could not use my hands to type out everything I had to say, but I wanted to address this sooner than later---noted, I should of just said f*ck it and not bother since that was just used as another reason to have my name in your mouth). I can’t address something I have no idea I somehow played a part of now can I?—but according to you, it’s me “spinning” because I didn’t address it in my vocaroo. Okay.
Anyway, heads up I will not be including any SS that I did not author (scared trust after all), is not relevant to the issues to the actual beef, was not posted on the game board and therefore public knowledge or if it mentions anyone’s name that has nothing to do with this.
*Disclaimer: I swear I do not usually keep 3 month old messages. 90% of them were deleted, I’ve just been traveling and I had other RL stuff going on that I never got around to deleting all of my messages.
Before I begin, I will state I make absolutely no apologies for the number of long a** posts that are about to follow (and there will be a lot….today, I got time cuz). Especially since Dazed and Elle felt the need to go 50+ pages deep with me constantly in their mouths. Unfortunately, I didn’t come with any salt, so I hope I taste good on your tongues all the same.
Now, Dazed is insisting that I said something “personal” to Elle on the first night (on March 1 before I nominated her) because on March 1 the day before the nominations were announced is when Elle apparently blocked Dazed on FB (episode 12, 11:23-11:31). As he writes “There was no talk about you to Phoenix until AFTER you blocked me on Facebook…your name was never mentioned…PR straight up lied to you so she could separate us…”. So while I am scratching my head thinking * WTF* given his own DR and the added screen shot he provides proves otherwise, (episode 3, 3:55-3:58). Date and time show he did mention Elle before the nominations. So I’m confused and my DR response following Dazed deleting was obviously filled with anger. This is when things began to make more sense (to me anyways) as to how this got so messed up. So this is what occurred:
*** for all of the DXP times, subtract 5 hours. I am saying this based on an old PM I have where the time is identified in the message. It indicates that DXP time stamp was off by 5 hours. It doesn’t really matter after March 2 though.
- March 1 @ 20:57 DXP (15:57pm) Dazed confirms this happened before the HOH comp in his DR (episode 2, 20:19-20:25; 20:51-21:08), which occurred at 8pm (20:00pm). Anyway, before the HOH comp I respond to a message that Dazed sent me addressing a Maf beef that occurred a year or so ago. He says he wants to make sure we’re good before we start to play the game. Said he didn’t want me to think he had another agenda in case I win HOH. I knew this was a front because we had addressed this Maf beef months ago before he deleted as Arkansassy and I even state this to him, but still I tell him yes, we are cool. I tell him I don’t know how well I will do since I don’t fully understand the game.
- March 1 @ 23:49 DXP (18:49pm) To demonstrate that I really am cool about everything and there are no hard feelings, I initiate a deal with Dazed and we agree not to target each other until top 3. Dazed confirms this in his DR and adds SS.
- March 1 @8:00-10ish pm we play the HOH comp. Based on a few things that were said in passing and the way things are playing out in the game, things looks sus to me, so I’m starting to question what I am seeing on the board. Namely the fact that I am constantly being put up so many times and how certain players are voting. I mention this in my DR response (episode 2, 18:09-19:10).
^^^As a side note, I find it funny that I get branded paranoid (constantly) for sharing what I am seeing on the game board in my DR---and I won’t deny that I can be paranoid about some things, it is what it is, however I get branded as paranoid in this thread and then we see in the very same episode (episode 2, 12:45-15:05) Dazed talking about exactly what I saw/was referring to in my DR response, telling the audience why certain votes were playing out the way they were during the HOH comp. He does so again later (in episode 3, 3:05-3:45; 3:55-4:00) and then it’s discussed again (episode 3, 5:00--5:57) explaining how they discussed the HOH comp, so things would play out in a particular fashion---but’s okay. I guess you just needed to get your 8th “Phoenix is so * insert word * ” comment on the thread. It’s cool. I wasn’t the only person that saw what was playing out on the board and commented on it btw. UVD made a similar observation in her DR in (episode 2, 14:10-14:19), but we’ll just say it’s because I’m “paranoid about everything”.
*** for all of the DXP times, subtract 5 hours. I am saying this based on an old PM I have where the time is identified in the message. It indicates that DXP time stamp was off by 5 hours. It doesn’t really matter after March 2 though.
- March 1 @ 20:57 DXP (15:57pm) Dazed confirms this happened before the HOH comp in his DR (episode 2, 20:19-20:25; 20:51-21:08), which occurred at 8pm (20:00pm). Anyway, before the HOH comp I respond to a message that Dazed sent me addressing a Maf beef that occurred a year or so ago. He says he wants to make sure we’re good before we start to play the game. Said he didn’t want me to think he had another agenda in case I win HOH. I knew this was a front because we had addressed this Maf beef months ago before he deleted as Arkansassy and I even state this to him, but still I tell him yes, we are cool. I tell him I don’t know how well I will do since I don’t fully understand the game.
- March 1 @ 23:49 DXP (18:49pm) To demonstrate that I really am cool about everything and there are no hard feelings, I initiate a deal with Dazed and we agree not to target each other until top 3. Dazed confirms this in his DR and adds SS.
- March 1 @8:00-10ish pm we play the HOH comp. Based on a few things that were said in passing and the way things are playing out in the game, things looks sus to me, so I’m starting to question what I am seeing on the board. Namely the fact that I am constantly being put up so many times and how certain players are voting. I mention this in my DR response (episode 2, 18:09-19:10).
^^^As a side note, I find it funny that I get branded paranoid (constantly) for sharing what I am seeing on the game board in my DR---and I won’t deny that I can be paranoid about some things, it is what it is, however I get branded as paranoid in this thread and then we see in the very same episode (episode 2, 12:45-15:05) Dazed talking about exactly what I saw/was referring to in my DR response, telling the audience why certain votes were playing out the way they were during the HOH comp. He does so again later (in episode 3, 3:05-3:45; 3:55-4:00) and then it’s discussed again (episode 3, 5:00--5:57) explaining how they discussed the HOH comp, so things would play out in a particular fashion---but’s okay. I guess you just needed to get your 8th “Phoenix is so * insert word * ” comment on the thread. It’s cool. I wasn’t the only person that saw what was playing out on the board and commented on it btw. UVD made a similar observation in her DR in (episode 2, 14:10-14:19), but we’ll just say it’s because I’m “paranoid about everything”.
It even funnier because on more than one occasion I lay something out that I’m seeing on the game board in my DR (e.g episode 5, 27:39-28:15; 30:03-30:15)…certain individuals feel the need to say petty sh*t about my commentary, but then Dazed comes right out in his own DR and say he’s doing exactly what I stated I saw on the game board (e.g. episode 5, 18:29-19:10; episode 6, 4:31-6:02). Anyways. I am highlighting the HOH comp and what happened and the fact that I could see something was going on because I later shared my observations with Elle in a final message to her and she somehow confuses that to mean something else as she states in her DR (ep 7, 21:10-21:34), but I’ll get to that. Moving on….
- March 1 @ 9:19pm just before HOH comp ends I message Elle on the game board that "someone" told me I should nominate her if I become HOH, to figure out if I could trust her.
^^^ Elle confirms this is what I sent her as per her DR (episode 3 6:20-6:30)
I message Elle on the game board because everyone was still active on the board and I thought I had to pick my nominations immediately after the HOH comp if I won and I needed to choose quickly. I was still new to the game and I was still figuring out how it was played. I end up winning HOH and then I am told that I did not need to decide my nominations right away, I had a day to make a decision. I probably drove Nights crazy asking him a million questions trying to figure out how to play the game. Appreciate the patience Nights. I eventually educated myself on the game after my HOH reign…
- March 1 @ 10:06pm right after I win the HOH comp Elle responds to my message, and what she actually said was “Are you surprised”, that’s what the game is all about, “I will not play like that…” Don't let someone make me a puppet. Then she states “If I won HOH....honestly, you would not be at the top of my list..you are not passive aggressive". I read the message quickly, but I had to deal with something IRL so I had to log off. I did not reply to Elle that night, but intended to follow up with her the next day. Dazed’s name was not mentioned at that point in time.
This was the only message I send Elle on the first night, the night Dazed is apparently blocked on FB. Now Elle could have blocked Dazed in response to my initial message to her, fair enough. However, if she did, it was not because I stated his name. Now the statement in quotations is what actually upsets me and starts this whole thing, which I will explain below.
- The next day I log into DXP not into the game to complete my DR questions, but before I do I read through my messages.
- March 2 @2:45 DXP (21:45pm March 1) I see Dazed’s message first. Out of the blue Dazed tells me that he wants me to hear it from him first that he told Elle he "would not hesitate to pull the trigger” on me. “That was before we made a deal"
^^^Dazed confirms this in his DR and adds the SS (episode 3, 3:55-3:58).
Okay….so I read this and I’m thinking you had this discussion before our deal, meaning before the HOH comp even started? Meaning before I could even start to play the game Dazed and Elle (---so I thought based on how I am reading this) planned to take me out of the game. So yes, I become upset. One of the main reasons I am upset is because I thought Elle lied to me in her message the night before when she said I wouldn’t be on the top of her list, because now I’m finding out that she was in fact part of a discussion to target me before the game even began. I mean if Elle isn’t a part of this plan with Dazed, why even include her name? It’s a simple, “hey just so you know, I was planning to target you before we made our deal”… So now I am also questioning who initiated this plan to take me out “without hesitation” given the way this is written.
^^^Now I can completely own I misunderstood the message. Combine this with some of the stuff I saw play out in the HOH comp and other things going on, it was where I went.
- March 1 @ 9:19pm just before HOH comp ends I message Elle on the game board that "someone" told me I should nominate her if I become HOH, to figure out if I could trust her.
^^^ Elle confirms this is what I sent her as per her DR (episode 3 6:20-6:30)
I message Elle on the game board because everyone was still active on the board and I thought I had to pick my nominations immediately after the HOH comp if I won and I needed to choose quickly. I was still new to the game and I was still figuring out how it was played. I end up winning HOH and then I am told that I did not need to decide my nominations right away, I had a day to make a decision. I probably drove Nights crazy asking him a million questions trying to figure out how to play the game. Appreciate the patience Nights. I eventually educated myself on the game after my HOH reign…
- March 1 @ 10:06pm right after I win the HOH comp Elle responds to my message, and what she actually said was “Are you surprised”, that’s what the game is all about, “I will not play like that…” Don't let someone make me a puppet. Then she states “If I won HOH....honestly, you would not be at the top of my list..you are not passive aggressive". I read the message quickly, but I had to deal with something IRL so I had to log off. I did not reply to Elle that night, but intended to follow up with her the next day. Dazed’s name was not mentioned at that point in time.
This was the only message I send Elle on the first night, the night Dazed is apparently blocked on FB. Now Elle could have blocked Dazed in response to my initial message to her, fair enough. However, if she did, it was not because I stated his name. Now the statement in quotations is what actually upsets me and starts this whole thing, which I will explain below.
- The next day I log into DXP not into the game to complete my DR questions, but before I do I read through my messages.
- March 2 @2:45 DXP (21:45pm March 1) I see Dazed’s message first. Out of the blue Dazed tells me that he wants me to hear it from him first that he told Elle he "would not hesitate to pull the trigger” on me. “That was before we made a deal"
^^^Dazed confirms this in his DR and adds the SS (episode 3, 3:55-3:58).
Okay….so I read this and I’m thinking you had this discussion before our deal, meaning before the HOH comp even started? Meaning before I could even start to play the game Dazed and Elle (---so I thought based on how I am reading this) planned to take me out of the game. So yes, I become upset. One of the main reasons I am upset is because I thought Elle lied to me in her message the night before when she said I wouldn’t be on the top of her list, because now I’m finding out that she was in fact part of a discussion to target me before the game even began. I mean if Elle isn’t a part of this plan with Dazed, why even include her name? It’s a simple, “hey just so you know, I was planning to target you before we made our deal”… So now I am also questioning who initiated this plan to take me out “without hesitation” given the way this is written.
^^^Now I can completely own I misunderstood the message. Combine this with some of the stuff I saw play out in the HOH comp and other things going on, it was where I went.
So I’m thinking Elle’s whole message the night before is bullsh*t and she’s trying to play me. Keep in mind, I don’t know this game is all about lying and everything else involved etc. I figured, it’s about joining forces with a few people, you win comps to stay in the game. So, I’m upset because I do not know where this plan to take me out is coming from at all, especially because it’s coming from Elle and Dazed. Elle is one person I would always choose to work with in a game, and I initiated a deal with Dazed, yet they are planning to take me out. Also, wrong or right, I simply do not respond well to people that try to play me. I am sure there are people reading this now that can confirm that I have told them straight up at one point or another in past Maf games (when I’ve been a townie), “if I find out you're playing me I will make it my mission to take you out” or some version of that. I may say it in a teasing way, but trust, I am dead serious when I say it. Elle was correct in her message to me, I am not passive aggressive. I’m very direct when it comes to that stuff, which I am sure you will see in my DRs. Elle has even told me to calm down a few times in a joking way when I’ve said this to her in Maf games, which I’ve laughed at, but she knows this is how I get down. I will take you out if you try to play me. I can own it, that stuff gets under my skin and it will definitely be one of the reasons I will target you. I wouldn’t expect any less from someone else if I tried to play them.
The second reason I am pissed off is because I felt Dazed should have told me about the plan to target me when we made our deal, not after I won the HOH because that sh*t didn’t just slip his mind. The final reason I was upset is quite obvious I think. Just reading the first 32 pages in this thread alone it is quite clear that no one likes to be targeted on day one, let alone find out that there was a plan to take you out before you even truly started the game from people you think for the most part you can ride with. Especially when I didn’t have any plan to target either of them when I first entered this game. I didn’t have any targets when I first entered this game and didn’t even want to choose anyone to go on the block (episode 2, 17:29-18:08). That changed after I found out there was a target on my back though.
There are individuals that played in this very game that know exactly how it feels to have a target on their back from day 1 whenever they sign up for a game. Dazed even created a fake account because it bothers him so much that he gets targeted early in games, so I am not sure why it would be such a surprise or hard to understand why it would bother me, or why I would be upset that the same thing was decided about me before we even had our first challenge.
Had I not approach Dazed for a final 3 deal I would have been taken out. No plan to work with me to see if we could actually work together and have some fun, there was just a plan to take me out as soon they got the chance (I am using the word “they” because at that point I believed Elle was also a part of this plan). I just wanted to lay those three things out so that the level of pissed off I’m feeling is understood. With a clearer head now, I can own that I let other things interfere with my head space and I read more into Dazed’s message than what was meant.
Anyway, after reading Dazed’s message to me telling me there was a plan to take me out without hesitation, I did not trust Dazed or Elle at that point. So I decide to stop talking to both Dazed and Elle. I still had not replied to Elle's message from the night before and I did not plan to. So, for a few different reasons I begin messaging other people that I felt comfortable with based on a few things the night before. We agree to form an alliance and develop a plan to stay in the game. I believed at the time that the plan was still in play despite what Dazed told me that he would still honour our deal. He clearly states in his own DR that he wasn’t fully confident that I would honour the deal either, so I am not the only person questioning if the deal we made would be honoured…I then send Night's my nominations once everyone discussed who they wanted to nominate. I log off to deal with RL stuff I had to attend to.
The second reason I am pissed off is because I felt Dazed should have told me about the plan to target me when we made our deal, not after I won the HOH because that sh*t didn’t just slip his mind. The final reason I was upset is quite obvious I think. Just reading the first 32 pages in this thread alone it is quite clear that no one likes to be targeted on day one, let alone find out that there was a plan to take you out before you even truly started the game from people you think for the most part you can ride with. Especially when I didn’t have any plan to target either of them when I first entered this game. I didn’t have any targets when I first entered this game and didn’t even want to choose anyone to go on the block (episode 2, 17:29-18:08). That changed after I found out there was a target on my back though.
There are individuals that played in this very game that know exactly how it feels to have a target on their back from day 1 whenever they sign up for a game. Dazed even created a fake account because it bothers him so much that he gets targeted early in games, so I am not sure why it would be such a surprise or hard to understand why it would bother me, or why I would be upset that the same thing was decided about me before we even had our first challenge.
Had I not approach Dazed for a final 3 deal I would have been taken out. No plan to work with me to see if we could actually work together and have some fun, there was just a plan to take me out as soon they got the chance (I am using the word “they” because at that point I believed Elle was also a part of this plan). I just wanted to lay those three things out so that the level of pissed off I’m feeling is understood. With a clearer head now, I can own that I let other things interfere with my head space and I read more into Dazed’s message than what was meant.
Anyway, after reading Dazed’s message to me telling me there was a plan to take me out without hesitation, I did not trust Dazed or Elle at that point. So I decide to stop talking to both Dazed and Elle. I still had not replied to Elle's message from the night before and I did not plan to. So, for a few different reasons I begin messaging other people that I felt comfortable with based on a few things the night before. We agree to form an alliance and develop a plan to stay in the game. I believed at the time that the plan was still in play despite what Dazed told me that he would still honour our deal. He clearly states in his own DR that he wasn’t fully confident that I would honour the deal either, so I am not the only person questioning if the deal we made would be honoured…I then send Night's my nominations once everyone discussed who they wanted to nominate. I log off to deal with RL stuff I had to attend to.
- Right before nominations maybe 5-7 minutes before, I log back onto the game board. I see Elle has sent me another message (March 2 @4:51pm), I still did not reply to the first message she sent me. I read the second message and I am getting even more pissed off now because I am thinking Elle is still lying to me. In the second message she tells me she went into the decision room since she believes she is a target early in the game and wants to negotiate a deal. Elle ask me to keep her off the block and she'll share with me what she got from the decision room, so we can decide what to do together and if she becomes HOH next round, she won’t put me up….Yeah, that ship had sailed…I wasn’t interested in making a deal at that point. I can become extremely cold and “fixed” when I am upset/hurt. There is no talking to me or negotiating with me when I am in that state, which you’ll probably see in the rest of the game. It’s not a good trait, but it is what it is. Anyway, nominations get posted on the board while I am reading this message.
- THAT is when I finally reply to Elle. March 2 @ 9:23pm. I tell her hey sorry, but I already gave the host my nominations, I didn't see your message until now (meaning the second message). I tell Elle she’ll be just fine anyway (I’m thinking well she’s working with Dazed and he'll try to win the veto and save her, and the two of them will probably target me like they planned if Elle stays in the game. I wasn’t falling for this “lets make a deal” bullsh*t). Hence my “she’ll be the last person standing” comment when I gave the reason for my nomination. I meant she’ll be the last one standing on the block. I also tell Elle, if you choose to put me on the block when you’re HOH, I understand, do what you have to do. Frankly, IDGAF because I already thought she was gonna put me on the block anyway since that was the plan, so there was no way I was going to ask her for anything to remain in the game or negotiate a deal with her. Plain and simple, I put Elle on the block knowing full well what the consequences would be, so I wasn’t going to pretend to work with her. I just didn’t care for all of that. If you’re gonna come for me, just come for me and own it. And now she at least knew I was coming for her too. That wasn’t about any “strategy” for the game. When I’m pissed, I let you know it.
^^^ Elle confirms my delayed message to her in her DR response (episode 3, 6:53- 7:07).
I will admit and acknowledge, I was a bit more heated towards Elle when I thought she was involved in a plan to target me. Mainly because I thought she lied to me and was trying to play me. I was pissed off at Dazed too, but he at least told me what was up and now I could prepare for that. I also sort of expected it from Dazed to some extent because of our history in games. I didn’t think he would target me before we even began the game, but I know he likes to win. I was definitely holding Elle to a different standard than Dazed, which isn’t fair or even reasonable, but it is what it is. I acknowledge that my misunderstanding of what Dazed stated in his message (amongst other things) contributed to my feelings in this moment as well.
- March 2 @ 9:29pm Elle sends me another message, asking me “can you at least tell me who put the knife in my back”
- March 2 @9:34 Elle sends me another message and now she is “fishing” for information. Maybe because I didn’t respond to her @9:29pm message fast enough IDK. She tells me “fwiw…Dazed was the only person that knew about her plans to travel ...during the veto competition”… Basically, Elle was laying out the idea that there was some conspiracy to set her up and take her out of the game, that she is being targeted. Then Elle states that “either Dazed or someone working with Dazed” is behind this.
- March 2 @9:35pm When I read Elle’s first message I’m already heated and I respond angrily (and probably personalizing this more than I should have due to other factors) and it is at this point when I tell Elle I know that she and Dazed talked about targeting me. I wasn’t going to go back and forth with her about it.
https://imgur.com/a/RTzAgzR
^^^again, this message is sent after Elle apparently blocked Dazed on FB, or at least that is what has been stated.
- THAT is when I finally reply to Elle. March 2 @ 9:23pm. I tell her hey sorry, but I already gave the host my nominations, I didn't see your message until now (meaning the second message). I tell Elle she’ll be just fine anyway (I’m thinking well she’s working with Dazed and he'll try to win the veto and save her, and the two of them will probably target me like they planned if Elle stays in the game. I wasn’t falling for this “lets make a deal” bullsh*t). Hence my “she’ll be the last person standing” comment when I gave the reason for my nomination. I meant she’ll be the last one standing on the block. I also tell Elle, if you choose to put me on the block when you’re HOH, I understand, do what you have to do. Frankly, IDGAF because I already thought she was gonna put me on the block anyway since that was the plan, so there was no way I was going to ask her for anything to remain in the game or negotiate a deal with her. Plain and simple, I put Elle on the block knowing full well what the consequences would be, so I wasn’t going to pretend to work with her. I just didn’t care for all of that. If you’re gonna come for me, just come for me and own it. And now she at least knew I was coming for her too. That wasn’t about any “strategy” for the game. When I’m pissed, I let you know it.
^^^ Elle confirms my delayed message to her in her DR response (episode 3, 6:53- 7:07).
I will admit and acknowledge, I was a bit more heated towards Elle when I thought she was involved in a plan to target me. Mainly because I thought she lied to me and was trying to play me. I was pissed off at Dazed too, but he at least told me what was up and now I could prepare for that. I also sort of expected it from Dazed to some extent because of our history in games. I didn’t think he would target me before we even began the game, but I know he likes to win. I was definitely holding Elle to a different standard than Dazed, which isn’t fair or even reasonable, but it is what it is. I acknowledge that my misunderstanding of what Dazed stated in his message (amongst other things) contributed to my feelings in this moment as well.
- March 2 @ 9:29pm Elle sends me another message, asking me “can you at least tell me who put the knife in my back”
- March 2 @9:34 Elle sends me another message and now she is “fishing” for information. Maybe because I didn’t respond to her @9:29pm message fast enough IDK. She tells me “fwiw…Dazed was the only person that knew about her plans to travel ...during the veto competition”… Basically, Elle was laying out the idea that there was some conspiracy to set her up and take her out of the game, that she is being targeted. Then Elle states that “either Dazed or someone working with Dazed” is behind this.
- March 2 @9:35pm When I read Elle’s first message I’m already heated and I respond angrily (and probably personalizing this more than I should have due to other factors) and it is at this point when I tell Elle I know that she and Dazed talked about targeting me. I wasn’t going to go back and forth with her about it.
https://imgur.com/a/RTzAgzR
^^^again, this message is sent after Elle apparently blocked Dazed on FB, or at least that is what has been stated.
- I had to respond to something else, but I then follow up to Elle’s last comment about the knife in her back, March 2 @9:48pm. At this point I was done. My short temper and lack of patience for people I think are trying to play me really isn’t a good combination. I think Elle is just trying to lie her way out of this by making it appear like she is being targeted, so she can stay in the game and now she is trying to cover for Dazed so she can keep him in the game by suggesting “someone working with Dazed” is planting seeds. So to cut that convo short I send her this https://imgur.com/a/zhm36Z9 and then I just log off the game because I am pissed and I was going to say a few things I would regret.
^^^I can own that this is where I probably (unintentionally) confused things, especially in the message that follows (based on what Elle said in her DR) but to be clear, that was not the intention. When I messaged Elle it was not done as a form of strategy or game play. Yes, we were in the middle of the game, but I was honestly upset and I just typed the response. If this was a form of strategy or a game I would have shared and/or discussed this “strategy” and this conversation with my alliance, just like I discussed everything else I said to the other players with them. I shared close to every interaction I had with the members in my alliance, except for this information above because this wasn’t a game move. No one knew I was having this convo with Elle. Anyway, I wanted Elle to know she was now a target for me and why I decided to put her on the block. Period. I did send Elle a follow up message to clear up the confusion shortly afterwards, which I will get to below.
- March 2 @10:39pm Elle send me a message that says “thank you me for letting me know”.
- I log back in much later and I see the “thank you for letting me know” message from Elle I then send a message as soon as I see her thank you message. March 2 @ 10:54pm I tell Elle, to be clear Dazed was not the person that said I should eliminate (meaning nominate) her. I told Elle I do not want that to get that mixed up or twisted, because it's not my style or intention to do that and I don't play that type of game. I tell her Dazed’s message “just made me think I couldn't trust you two” anymore because you two planned to target me https://imgur.com/a/d7tHJ6r then I logged off because I am thinking this conversation is done.
- I sent this last message to Elle because I did not want Elle to think Dazed was the person I was referring to in my first messaged to her, which is why I made sure to tell her that. Because I was pissed I kept my messages brief when I attempted to clear it up. Lazy PMing on my part, but I thought the message was clear enough. However I can own I did not make it explicitly clear that one thing (my first message to her) and what we were now discussing on March 2 (my knowledge of having a target on my back) had nothing to do with the other.
- March 2 @ 10:54pm and 11:04pm Elle sends me two more messages. I did not read them at the time because I was done with this mess and I had already logged off the game board for the night. I was also travelling, which made things challenging. The 10:54pm message was Elle asking me to confirm a message that was sent to her from Effy telling her that Effy, Yodi, UVD and myself were in an alliance with Elle and we had a plan to save her from the block if she didn’t win the veto (that is what UVD’s “person 1 and person 2 and person 29” is all about). The second message @11:04pm was Elle telling me how upset she was and how unfair she thought it was being put on the block, amongst some other things that pissed me off even more and was duly noted. She then tells me she was done discussing this. So I’m confused and pissed about a few things she wrote, and I’m questioning her anger because I’m thinking I didn't do anything wrong here. Dazed and Elle were the ones talking about targeting me before the HOH comp even started. So how the hell are you upset? At this point some other stuff is circulating making things even more confusing for me.
^^^I can own that this is where I probably (unintentionally) confused things, especially in the message that follows (based on what Elle said in her DR) but to be clear, that was not the intention. When I messaged Elle it was not done as a form of strategy or game play. Yes, we were in the middle of the game, but I was honestly upset and I just typed the response. If this was a form of strategy or a game I would have shared and/or discussed this “strategy” and this conversation with my alliance, just like I discussed everything else I said to the other players with them. I shared close to every interaction I had with the members in my alliance, except for this information above because this wasn’t a game move. No one knew I was having this convo with Elle. Anyway, I wanted Elle to know she was now a target for me and why I decided to put her on the block. Period. I did send Elle a follow up message to clear up the confusion shortly afterwards, which I will get to below.
- March 2 @10:39pm Elle send me a message that says “thank you me for letting me know”.
- I log back in much later and I see the “thank you for letting me know” message from Elle I then send a message as soon as I see her thank you message. March 2 @ 10:54pm I tell Elle, to be clear Dazed was not the person that said I should eliminate (meaning nominate) her. I told Elle I do not want that to get that mixed up or twisted, because it's not my style or intention to do that and I don't play that type of game. I tell her Dazed’s message “just made me think I couldn't trust you two” anymore because you two planned to target me https://imgur.com/a/d7tHJ6r then I logged off because I am thinking this conversation is done.
- I sent this last message to Elle because I did not want Elle to think Dazed was the person I was referring to in my first messaged to her, which is why I made sure to tell her that. Because I was pissed I kept my messages brief when I attempted to clear it up. Lazy PMing on my part, but I thought the message was clear enough. However I can own I did not make it explicitly clear that one thing (my first message to her) and what we were now discussing on March 2 (my knowledge of having a target on my back) had nothing to do with the other.
- March 2 @ 10:54pm and 11:04pm Elle sends me two more messages. I did not read them at the time because I was done with this mess and I had already logged off the game board for the night. I was also travelling, which made things challenging. The 10:54pm message was Elle asking me to confirm a message that was sent to her from Effy telling her that Effy, Yodi, UVD and myself were in an alliance with Elle and we had a plan to save her from the block if she didn’t win the veto (that is what UVD’s “person 1 and person 2 and person 29” is all about). The second message @11:04pm was Elle telling me how upset she was and how unfair she thought it was being put on the block, amongst some other things that pissed me off even more and was duly noted. She then tells me she was done discussing this. So I’m confused and pissed about a few things she wrote, and I’m questioning her anger because I’m thinking I didn't do anything wrong here. Dazed and Elle were the ones talking about targeting me before the HOH comp even started. So how the hell are you upset? At this point some other stuff is circulating making things even more confusing for me.
- The next day (March 3) before the veto comp while I’m running around dealing with some other stuff, that is when I actually read Elle’s final 2 messages (@10:54 and @11:04). Before I do that I messaging some people in my alliance about having our names dropped to Elle so they would know what was up. I then respond to Elle. I ONLY respond to her to address 1) her question about a plan to save her from being evicted, 2) to clarify some miscommunication that we were forming an alliance together and 3) to respond to her position that she felt she was being treated unfairly because I thought that statement was so backwards at the time. At this point I am annoyed with these two messages and other stuff I am juggling, so I probably should have just deleted the messages and moved on. Instead, I tell Elle I thought she was playing unfair and I didn’t appreciate being targeted before the game even truly began. I was getting pissed off and irritated that Elle was *trying* (this is my belief of what she was doing) to make it seem like there was some master plan to take her out of the game, because that isn’t how it happened. So to shoot that theory down I very quickly (probably too quickly because I am out of patience at this point) break things down, throwing the various events from the last 2 days all together smh… ( meaning the message I received, my thoughts/belief on the matter and my observations of the HOH comp, which led me to suspect something was up). I shouldn’t have done this because I was flustered and all over the god d*mn place when I responded.
Anyway, I tell Elle that Dazed had approach me to squash a Mafia beef and I then made a deal with Dazed. I told Elle exactly what the deal was, which was we would not target each other. I was very clear that Dazed and I were not in an alliance together, simply a deal to not target each other (so she can save the conspiracy theory to target her). After the deal, before I come back to the game board Dazed sends me a message and that was when he told me about their convo, which was… Dazed told Elle as soon as he has the chance he wouldn’t hesitate to take me out of the game. I tell Elle it seems like she initiated this plan based on a number of things during the game. I then tell Elle as I was watching the HOH comp I knew something was up and this is why I made the comment about Mafia jumping on the bandwagon during the game because it seemed “off…”. I let Elle know that I messaged her (March 2 @9:23) because I was upset/hurt.
Now, in regards to my Mafia comment during the HOH comp----I did not tell Elle that Dazed said anything about them discussing my Mafia comment, or her “cringing” in response to what I posted on the board like she says here (ep 7, 21:10-21:34).
Logically, this^^^ doesn’t even make sense. I’m sure Dazed will confirm he never said anything to me about a Mafia comment at any point in time, so there is no way I could have known they had this conversation to be able to relay it back to tell Elle “verbatim”. Therefore, if Dazed never told me about this conversation, then Elle is suggesting that I magically knew exactly what they discussed on a private messenger chat prior to and during the HOH comp and was able to relay that back to her “verbatim” when I messaged her. There is no way that is even possible and it never happened. The only statement I made to Elle about Mafia is the one I wrote above, explaining my comment. The thing is, Elle is the one that actually tells me that she made the Mafia comment and it made her cringe. She does so in response to a message I send her much later on March 7, which I will get to. Moving on…
Anyway, I tell Elle that Dazed had approach me to squash a Mafia beef and I then made a deal with Dazed. I told Elle exactly what the deal was, which was we would not target each other. I was very clear that Dazed and I were not in an alliance together, simply a deal to not target each other (so she can save the conspiracy theory to target her). After the deal, before I come back to the game board Dazed sends me a message and that was when he told me about their convo, which was… Dazed told Elle as soon as he has the chance he wouldn’t hesitate to take me out of the game. I tell Elle it seems like she initiated this plan based on a number of things during the game. I then tell Elle as I was watching the HOH comp I knew something was up and this is why I made the comment about Mafia jumping on the bandwagon during the game because it seemed “off…”. I let Elle know that I messaged her (March 2 @9:23) because I was upset/hurt.
Now, in regards to my Mafia comment during the HOH comp----I did not tell Elle that Dazed said anything about them discussing my Mafia comment, or her “cringing” in response to what I posted on the board like she says here (ep 7, 21:10-21:34).
Logically, this^^^ doesn’t even make sense. I’m sure Dazed will confirm he never said anything to me about a Mafia comment at any point in time, so there is no way I could have known they had this conversation to be able to relay it back to tell Elle “verbatim”. Therefore, if Dazed never told me about this conversation, then Elle is suggesting that I magically knew exactly what they discussed on a private messenger chat prior to and during the HOH comp and was able to relay that back to her “verbatim” when I messaged her. There is no way that is even possible and it never happened. The only statement I made to Elle about Mafia is the one I wrote above, explaining my comment. The thing is, Elle is the one that actually tells me that she made the Mafia comment and it made her cringe. She does so in response to a message I send her much later on March 7, which I will get to. Moving on…
In this very same message (March 3), I inform Elle that she and I are not in an alliance together, however the person that reached out to her to share this plan to save her from the block would like to work with her. In keeping with that I told her I would not vote to evict her (I thought the HOH could vote) and I will not target her. I let her know that the reason I was not going to target her was not because I regret my decision to put her on the block, but it is because I will not interfere or sabotage Effy’s game if she and he would like to join forces. However, I want no part of it. I told Elle I will not work with her “because this whole thing rubbed me the wrong way”. That was all I needed to say, so I left it there. I had no plans to message her again.
- March 3 @20:31 DXP I receive a message from Dazed asking me who I would like him to vote for. Says he wants to vote in my best interest. I ignore him. I have absolutely no plans to talk to him for the rest of the game.
- At this point I keep getting messages from the people in my alliance because Dazed is messaging them about the votes and they are panicking. I tell them to ignore him. I still refuse to respond to his PM asking about voting, but when I get more and more worried messages from other people I think if I respond to Dazed’s message then he will back off of the people in the alliance. However, because I am going back and forth with so many people I get flustered and I accidently send the message I meant to send to Dazed to Nights. I am sure Nights read my PM and thinking *wtf?* lol. Anyway…
- I am still getting panic messages and that is when I realize I didn’t send my message to Dazed (but Nights). I couldn’t send anymore message for the night, so March 4 @2:09 DXP I copy and paste the same message I sent to Nights and send it to Dazed telling him I will keep my word and honour our deal, but I am not going to tell you who to vote for. You need to own that decision. I tell him this because I’m thinking we are not working together, so cut the sh*t and stop pretending you want to do anything in “my best interest”. I log off.
- March 4 @2:14 DXP Dazed responds back to me asking me if we are still good if he does not vote with me. Says he does not want me to hold it against him if he doesn’t vote the person I want out of the game. I don’t see this until much later. When I eventually see this I don’t respond to Dazed because I am getting irritated by this message.
Now I am getting irritated because one, Dazed is not aware that I know he is messaging various players, including the people in my alliance trying to make a deal to save one of the people on the block, so that whole wanting to vote in “my best interest” was bs imo and I know it. Now also add the fact that I have some people messaging me because Elle won the veto the night before and they are worried about what will happen if Dazed succeeds and saves another person believed to be his ally from the block…
The other reason I am upset is because I now have people in my alliance doubting me and asking me if I am “playing” them because of something Dazed apparently said to them in PM.
- March 3 @20:31 DXP I receive a message from Dazed asking me who I would like him to vote for. Says he wants to vote in my best interest. I ignore him. I have absolutely no plans to talk to him for the rest of the game.
- At this point I keep getting messages from the people in my alliance because Dazed is messaging them about the votes and they are panicking. I tell them to ignore him. I still refuse to respond to his PM asking about voting, but when I get more and more worried messages from other people I think if I respond to Dazed’s message then he will back off of the people in the alliance. However, because I am going back and forth with so many people I get flustered and I accidently send the message I meant to send to Dazed to Nights. I am sure Nights read my PM and thinking *wtf?* lol. Anyway…
- I am still getting panic messages and that is when I realize I didn’t send my message to Dazed (but Nights). I couldn’t send anymore message for the night, so March 4 @2:09 DXP I copy and paste the same message I sent to Nights and send it to Dazed telling him I will keep my word and honour our deal, but I am not going to tell you who to vote for. You need to own that decision. I tell him this because I’m thinking we are not working together, so cut the sh*t and stop pretending you want to do anything in “my best interest”. I log off.
- March 4 @2:14 DXP Dazed responds back to me asking me if we are still good if he does not vote with me. Says he does not want me to hold it against him if he doesn’t vote the person I want out of the game. I don’t see this until much later. When I eventually see this I don’t respond to Dazed because I am getting irritated by this message.
Now I am getting irritated because one, Dazed is not aware that I know he is messaging various players, including the people in my alliance trying to make a deal to save one of the people on the block, so that whole wanting to vote in “my best interest” was bs imo and I know it. Now also add the fact that I have some people messaging me because Elle won the veto the night before and they are worried about what will happen if Dazed succeeds and saves another person believed to be his ally from the block…
The other reason I am upset is because I now have people in my alliance doubting me and asking me if I am “playing” them because of something Dazed apparently said to them in PM.
- So that is why on March 4 @13:35 DXP, I tell Dazed naw we are not good, “but that is outside of this game” (not “inside and outside of the game” like he said in his DR episode 10, 26:18-26:30 and is writing in this thread)… What I meant by this statement is I’m upset, but we will discuss the issues behind my anger towards him when the game is over (I reiterate this very same thing in the following message much more clearly apparently). I had already gone back and forth with Elle and I just didn’t have the energy or patience to do it again with Dazed. I didn’t want to hear any more lies because it was pissing me off…. I just wanted to focus on the game and try to calm my alliance. Then I tell Dazed that what I will hold against him is if he does not honour our deal to not target me until final 5. I’m thinking if Dazed succeeds at getting his ally off the block then I need to at least make sure he’ll honour the deal we made. My message: https://imgur.com/a/MzYLGxv
^^^Now I f*cked up here because I was suppose to go back to Dazed the day before to tell him that there was now a new deal for top 5 vs top 3, however because of all of the messaging, all the back and forth, traveling and the fact that I was getting increasingly upset about the whole Elle and Dazed targeting me, I did not get a chance to tell him before this message. The people in my alliance were all aware I was suppose to go back and tell Dazed there was a top 5 deal as we discussed, but I just got caught up with other things. Anyway…
^^^Now I f*cked up here because I was suppose to go back to Dazed the day before to tell him that there was now a new deal for top 5 vs top 3, however because of all of the messaging, all the back and forth, traveling and the fact that I was getting increasingly upset about the whole Elle and Dazed targeting me, I did not get a chance to tell him before this message. The people in my alliance were all aware I was suppose to go back and tell Dazed there was a top 5 deal as we discussed, but I just got caught up with other things. Anyway…
- March 4 @16:37 DXP Dazed points out our deal was originally final 3 and asks is this deal null/void and March 4 @19:44 DXP he ask me why are we no longer good outside of the game. However I do not see these messages until several hours later when I log back in because I’m dealing with other stuff. When I do log in before I see Dazed’s messages, I’m told to check out the game board, so I do. I don’t know what the hell is going on, but Dazed is all over the game board going on and on telling everyone he’s going to be backdoored and “the HOH” doesn’t know how to keep personal beef out of the game…I was petty, amongst other things. Now I am pissed when I read this because I’m thinking wtf is he talking about? If I were holding a past beef against him I would not have initiated a deal with him. I wouldn’t have told my alliance I had to honour my deal with him even though they were not happy about it. I fully intended to honour our deal to not target each other, despite finding out afterwards that he planned to take me out of the game and I did not appreciate Dazed stating otherwise on the board.
^^^Dazed states in his DR that he believe I planned to backdoor him (ep 3, 20:31-20:46; 21:00-21:12; 35:45-36:10) and I guess because I didn’t respond to his last message he thought it was true, I don’t know.
^^^Little does Dazed know, I was asked by the host to provide 3 names to go on the block when I won HOH. …My first two nominations and a third name in case one of my nominations was saved from the block. So I had given all of my nominations--- including my re-nomination well before Elle saved herself from the block. It was Cuddlebug. I was given the opportunity to change my renom immediately after Elle won the veto and I said I was keeping it the same. So I did not appreciate having my integrity questioned, or the fact that Dazed was trying to paint me as a person that would make a deal and use that as an opportunity to take him out of the game early, especially over a beef we already discussed and settled. Twice.… At this point I already had some people in my alliance questioning if they can really trust me because of something Dazed apparently said in PM and now I have my alliance (who knows about my deal with Dazed) thinking that I might do the same thing to them because of what he is writing all over the game board. I was pissed…. I made a deal with Dazed, then I find out he had plans to take me out of the game as soon as he could. I ask my alliance not to target him, which is now making them question if I am “playing” them and now he’s writing sh*t that isn’t even true on the board….I was so upset.
^^^Dazed states in his DR that he believe I planned to backdoor him (ep 3, 20:31-20:46; 21:00-21:12; 35:45-36:10) and I guess because I didn’t respond to his last message he thought it was true, I don’t know.
^^^Little does Dazed know, I was asked by the host to provide 3 names to go on the block when I won HOH. …My first two nominations and a third name in case one of my nominations was saved from the block. So I had given all of my nominations--- including my re-nomination well before Elle saved herself from the block. It was Cuddlebug. I was given the opportunity to change my renom immediately after Elle won the veto and I said I was keeping it the same. So I did not appreciate having my integrity questioned, or the fact that Dazed was trying to paint me as a person that would make a deal and use that as an opportunity to take him out of the game early, especially over a beef we already discussed and settled. Twice.… At this point I already had some people in my alliance questioning if they can really trust me because of something Dazed apparently said in PM and now I have my alliance (who knows about my deal with Dazed) thinking that I might do the same thing to them because of what he is writing all over the game board. I was pissed…. I made a deal with Dazed, then I find out he had plans to take me out of the game as soon as he could. I ask my alliance not to target him, which is now making them question if I am “playing” them and now he’s writing sh*t that isn’t even true on the board….I was so upset.
- So March 5 @00:29 DXP I finally respond to Dazed’s last 2 messages. I tell him it is not my style to lead people on and backstab them “despite what he is promoting on the board” ---meaning, I am not the type of person that would lead him to believe we are “cool” and then backstab him and I did not appreciate the underhanded comments Dazed was writing on the game board suggesting I would. I didn’t appreciate him saying I was upset about a past Maf beef and using that to target him because it was bullsh*t. I was not talking about anyone he may or may not have talked to in PM or anyone I had talked to through PMs. I was talking about what he was writing on the god d*mn game board. I told Dazed I no longer trust him because I was hurt by some of the things he said and done--- meaning the sh*t he was writing on the game board and when he told me about his plan to target me---I wasn’t referring to anyone else when I made this statement either.
I also tell Dazed that I was not going to work with someone I couldn’t trust. I tell him I will honour our deal, but our limit is top 5. I say this because it would allow Dazed to stay in the game (because I know that is a sore spot for him because he gets targeted early), but more importantly it allows him to stay in the game without resorting to backstabbing me because I knew I would have really personalized that sh*t and we would be right back where we were a year ago. I was trying to play as fairly as possible despite knowing he had a plan to target me, but I wasn’t going to act like we’re all good and things are cool between us as if we’re riding hand in hand to the final 3 when we weren’t, so that is why I told him what was up. This was the same thing I was trying to get across to Elle in my last message to her when I told her I wouldn’t vote to evict her or target her, but I would not work with her either. Anyway, I tell Dazed we can discuss it after the game. I didn't have the energy to go back and forth with him and fully explain everything I was feeling. I walk away from the conversation because I am really upset at this point.
https://imgur.com/a/b69L9ca
I come back to my inbox and I read and respond to a few messages to the people in my alliance. I’m getting irritated by some of the stuff I am reading and I notice Dazed has sent me another message. I planned to ignore it, but I read it anyway…
I also tell Dazed that I was not going to work with someone I couldn’t trust. I tell him I will honour our deal, but our limit is top 5. I say this because it would allow Dazed to stay in the game (because I know that is a sore spot for him because he gets targeted early), but more importantly it allows him to stay in the game without resorting to backstabbing me because I knew I would have really personalized that sh*t and we would be right back where we were a year ago. I was trying to play as fairly as possible despite knowing he had a plan to target me, but I wasn’t going to act like we’re all good and things are cool between us as if we’re riding hand in hand to the final 3 when we weren’t, so that is why I told him what was up. This was the same thing I was trying to get across to Elle in my last message to her when I told her I wouldn’t vote to evict her or target her, but I would not work with her either. Anyway, I tell Dazed we can discuss it after the game. I didn't have the energy to go back and forth with him and fully explain everything I was feeling. I walk away from the conversation because I am really upset at this point.
https://imgur.com/a/b69L9ca
I come back to my inbox and I read and respond to a few messages to the people in my alliance. I’m getting irritated by some of the stuff I am reading and I notice Dazed has sent me another message. I planned to ignore it, but I read it anyway…
- March 5@ 00:44 DXP Dazed responds to my last message to him by saying I can believe what I want about what he’s “promoting”… and then he proceeds to share an exchange between him and Elle and I completely lose my temper. I’m not going to front, I was beyond pissed off, amongst some other things I was feeling. I feel no shame in having emotions, or being impacted by someone else’s words if I care about them. I’m not a god d*mn robot. So I lost it. To be clear, Elle’s name was not included in this message, so I will own that I made an assumption that the message I read was between Dazed and Elle, however I made this assumption because Dazed clearly stated in the PM that it was between he and “the same person I told I would pull the trigger on you” (meaning Elle).
When I read this ^^^I was pissed off for a number of reasons, but to keep it focused on my feelings related to the game, one reason I was upset was because I thought Elle had lied to me about everything and she was playing me. I’m thinking all the stuff she said about me not being on her list, wanting to work with me, some conspiracy to target her was all an act because now I’m being informed that Elle was putting in Dazed’s head that I was coming for him and she “urged” Dazed to pull the trigger on me. What pissed me off the most about this is the fact that I was genuinely upset when I messaged Elle during the nomination ceremony, and I expressed that to her in my final message to her (on March 3), but apparently (or how I perceived it in my angered state) that was all a big joke to her given she not only knew about a plan to target me, she encouraged it and she was lying to me about. Everything she told me was just some bullsh*t so she could stay in the game.
- So after reading that message I am so upset I wanted to leave the game so I sent out messages because I was gonna quit. I then talk it out with two people and I was encouraged to stay in the game. I take some space away from the game to calm down. After some time, now fueled by my anger I decide I was going to remain in the game, but I have a completely different objective now. From that point on, I didn’t care about winning, my only focus was to help the people in my alliance make it to the finals as I stated in my DR (episode 6, 41:35-42:22; 43:02-43:23) and I wanted to take Dazed and Elle out of the game.
When I read this ^^^I was pissed off for a number of reasons, but to keep it focused on my feelings related to the game, one reason I was upset was because I thought Elle had lied to me about everything and she was playing me. I’m thinking all the stuff she said about me not being on her list, wanting to work with me, some conspiracy to target her was all an act because now I’m being informed that Elle was putting in Dazed’s head that I was coming for him and she “urged” Dazed to pull the trigger on me. What pissed me off the most about this is the fact that I was genuinely upset when I messaged Elle during the nomination ceremony, and I expressed that to her in my final message to her (on March 3), but apparently (or how I perceived it in my angered state) that was all a big joke to her given she not only knew about a plan to target me, she encouraged it and she was lying to me about. Everything she told me was just some bullsh*t so she could stay in the game.
- So after reading that message I am so upset I wanted to leave the game so I sent out messages because I was gonna quit. I then talk it out with two people and I was encouraged to stay in the game. I take some space away from the game to calm down. After some time, now fueled by my anger I decide I was going to remain in the game, but I have a completely different objective now. From that point on, I didn’t care about winning, my only focus was to help the people in my alliance make it to the finals as I stated in my DR (episode 6, 41:35-42:22; 43:02-43:23) and I wanted to take Dazed and Elle out of the game.
- So I withdraw from the game a little bit and keep to myself for a few days so I can calm down and I tried to let the issue go, but couldn’t so I send Elle a final message on March 7 @9:43 DXP to tell her how I feel and why, so she would know why I was not going to honour what I told her on March 3 (that I would not target her or vote to evict her going forward). Not after everything I had found out. That is when I tell Elle I felt mocked and I inform her that I saw the convo between her and Dazed and I found it hard to believe that it wasn’t true. I didn’t share any details of the convo or quote Dazed, I just discussed how I felt about everything. https://imgur.com/a/nWOb5c1
- March 7 @9:57 Elle replies back and says she doesn’t know what I am talking about and the only comment she made to Dazed was when she mentioned me throwing “shade” during the HOH comp and that “it was cringe” only because she knew there was some beef between Dazed and I from a past Mafia game. Then she says she did not know the Mafia comment I made on the board during the HOH comp was being directed toward her, and “for no reason” (She was referencing my March 3 message because I did not mention it in this March 7 PM).
Whatever. I wasn’t planning to go back and forth with Elle over this. I didn’t read any reference to my Mafia comment or her “cringing” at me for “throwing shade” in the message Dazed sent me. When Elle brought it up (March 7 @9:57) it was the first time I was made aware of that statement, so I thought she was trying to downplay her role in this plan to target me and I was over it. I was done with all of the “who said what” and that wasn’t the intention of my PM to her anyway. I just wanted her to know where I stood, so there would be no surprise when I came after her every chance I got. With Dazed, our deal was done as well, but I did not send him any additional messages. Dazed also had enough targets on his back especially after they spilled all that tea on the game board and it looked like he was behind UVD’s nomination. I make reference to this in (ep 12, 21:47-22:40).
^^^That is what got us to this point, as long and drawn out as it was. My PMs were not sent as a “strategy” to ruin a relationship. I misunderstood some information I read. I was upset and I let those individuals know why.
At this point, I'm done explaining my intentions behind this situation. You can believe what you want. My messages post game to Dazed and Elle was summarizing why I think this snowballed into something bigger… that I misunderstood what was said/happened, I accepted my role in the misunderstanding and explain why I was upset, I was not trying to spin anything.
- March 7 @9:57 Elle replies back and says she doesn’t know what I am talking about and the only comment she made to Dazed was when she mentioned me throwing “shade” during the HOH comp and that “it was cringe” only because she knew there was some beef between Dazed and I from a past Mafia game. Then she says she did not know the Mafia comment I made on the board during the HOH comp was being directed toward her, and “for no reason” (She was referencing my March 3 message because I did not mention it in this March 7 PM).
Whatever. I wasn’t planning to go back and forth with Elle over this. I didn’t read any reference to my Mafia comment or her “cringing” at me for “throwing shade” in the message Dazed sent me. When Elle brought it up (March 7 @9:57) it was the first time I was made aware of that statement, so I thought she was trying to downplay her role in this plan to target me and I was over it. I was done with all of the “who said what” and that wasn’t the intention of my PM to her anyway. I just wanted her to know where I stood, so there would be no surprise when I came after her every chance I got. With Dazed, our deal was done as well, but I did not send him any additional messages. Dazed also had enough targets on his back especially after they spilled all that tea on the game board and it looked like he was behind UVD’s nomination. I make reference to this in (ep 12, 21:47-22:40).
^^^That is what got us to this point, as long and drawn out as it was. My PMs were not sent as a “strategy” to ruin a relationship. I misunderstood some information I read. I was upset and I let those individuals know why.
At this point, I'm done explaining my intentions behind this situation. You can believe what you want. My messages post game to Dazed and Elle was summarizing why I think this snowballed into something bigger… that I misunderstood what was said/happened, I accepted my role in the misunderstanding and explain why I was upset, I was not trying to spin anything.
Now, as for your ongoing commentary on my DR responses…. Dazed and Elle, you feel the need to point out the various “contradictions” in my DR responses without any knowledge of the full context, without a full understanding of my what was said or why. And let’s be real, your antagonism is because you want to try to paint a picture of who you think I am so it fits your narrative. Because god forbid, a Scorp couldn’t possibly make a mistake about what they think they know about someone’s motives. It’s okay though. I get it. Most Scorps seem to believe things are so black and white that if you do anything different due the circumstances involved you’re “full of it”. Myself included when it comes to certain issues. I have no issue acknowledging I can be hypocritical in certain circumstances. Life is not as black and white as fixed signs like to make it. But let’s explore my contradictions shall we:
Well there was the “I’m not gonna get into detail because it’s nobody’s business, but then she calls Effy out for smoking weed”. First off, the question asked me why UVD was chosen over Effy, which I broke down so it would make sense as to why we were voting to evict someone in our alliance so early in the game. The question did not ask me to share my personal thoughts or my feelings about why I didn’t want to form an alliance with Elle. And even if it had, my thoughts and feelings aren’t your business until I choose to make them your business. Is that not the case for you? The sh*t I am doing or not doing in the game is a different story, which is what we all discussed in our DRs no? We talked about what people were doing in the game.
Silly me, I thought it was relevant to discuss the activities that led to why trust was shaky within the alliance (e.g. using an excuse we didn’t believe at the time) and that was one of the reasons why we voted to evict him. I guess it would have been better if I didn’t explain anything at all----but then I am sure you would have something slick to say about how we just flipped on Effy for no reason the first chance we got. Right? Oh wait, Elle did throw that comment out too…Hmph. Can’t seem to win. It’s interesting that you listened to my DR and what you took from what I said was the fact I was calling Effy out “for smoking weed”, when I have no f*cks to give about an adult doing what the hell they want to do in their own home. I have no judgment around that. To be clear, he was called out because we did not believe weed was the real reason he dropped our names.
Well there was the “I’m not gonna get into detail because it’s nobody’s business, but then she calls Effy out for smoking weed”. First off, the question asked me why UVD was chosen over Effy, which I broke down so it would make sense as to why we were voting to evict someone in our alliance so early in the game. The question did not ask me to share my personal thoughts or my feelings about why I didn’t want to form an alliance with Elle. And even if it had, my thoughts and feelings aren’t your business until I choose to make them your business. Is that not the case for you? The sh*t I am doing or not doing in the game is a different story, which is what we all discussed in our DRs no? We talked about what people were doing in the game.
Silly me, I thought it was relevant to discuss the activities that led to why trust was shaky within the alliance (e.g. using an excuse we didn’t believe at the time) and that was one of the reasons why we voted to evict him. I guess it would have been better if I didn’t explain anything at all----but then I am sure you would have something slick to say about how we just flipped on Effy for no reason the first chance we got. Right? Oh wait, Elle did throw that comment out too…Hmph. Can’t seem to win. It’s interesting that you listened to my DR and what you took from what I said was the fact I was calling Effy out “for smoking weed”, when I have no f*cks to give about an adult doing what the hell they want to do in their own home. I have no judgment around that. To be clear, he was called out because we did not believe weed was the real reason he dropped our names.
Now Elle’s name was only mentioned in that DR because it was the second reason we began to doubt Effy. Because yes, despite what she is saying now, she did approach me to ask me about a plan that Effy shared with her to save her from the block if she did not win the veto, when I nominated her. And yes, our names were dropped in that message, so I addressed it with her to correct any misunderstanding she may have. I shared this message with the members of my alliance when I received it from Elle because it in involved them and we had to figure out how to address it, but now it’s “more bullsh*t. I NEVER approach PR for ANYTHING!!!!” Okay. Whatever. Phrasing and the words we use is everything I am beginning to realize with you two. Had I said * in my office voice * “Elle, sent me a sacred PM, on March 2, 2019 which described a cunning plan to save her from eviction if she did not win the golden power of veto….This PM also stated that my teammates and I were planning to form an alliance with her…” would you remember the PM then? Are you really hung up on the word “approached”? * eye roll*.
As for “calling out” Effy in my DR, I addressed that with him already. He was cool with me discussing why we doubted him, said he found it “hilarious”, and his feelings on the matter are all that matter to me (I love the fact that Gems get me more than Scorps do). He expressed what did bother him about my comment---and I can appreciate that and I apologized. I thought it was common knowledge, but whether it was common knowledge or not, it was a thoughtless comment. I did not mean to imply that he was not a good teammate.
Then there is “PR: I'm not into this vague bullshit. Tell me exactly what your thoughts are.
Also PR: Gives everyone just enough vague bullshit to keep them "in the loop"… First off not sure who “them” are, but if you’re referring to the people that were in my alliance, have a seat. I am sure I do not need to explain why I would have different expectations and would be completely up front with someone in my alliance (as long as I still trust them) oppose to everyone else in the game. Pretty much 97% of the PM I received and sent that was not personal in nature was shared verbatim with the people in my alliance so they always knew what was up and could make an informed decision for their game. So yeah, I didn’t want to hear any “vague bullsh*t” from someone I trusted and was supporting to win. Especially if the actions (imo) were unexpected based on what was said behind the scenes. Context is everything, so since you missed it or perhaps chose to ignore it because it doesn’t fit your narrative, I was no longer trying to win the game. It was stated in episode 6 and 12, but I made that decision and we discussed it well before. So, imo there is no need to try to set up an alliance member (if that is what happened), if we are supposed to be working for the same goal: they both make it to the finals. I also don't appreciate (unintentionally) being made to look like I was part of plan to backstab an alliance member that I gave my word to and care about. I wanted to better understand what happened to come up with a game plan to keep everyone safe ---as long as they weren’t f*cking around and trying to double cross the other. So yeah, no “vague bullsh*t”. Again, context is everything.
I didn’t think I would have to break that down. But I guess I do.
As for “calling out” Effy in my DR, I addressed that with him already. He was cool with me discussing why we doubted him, said he found it “hilarious”, and his feelings on the matter are all that matter to me (I love the fact that Gems get me more than Scorps do). He expressed what did bother him about my comment---and I can appreciate that and I apologized. I thought it was common knowledge, but whether it was common knowledge or not, it was a thoughtless comment. I did not mean to imply that he was not a good teammate.
Then there is “PR: I'm not into this vague bullshit. Tell me exactly what your thoughts are.
Also PR: Gives everyone just enough vague bullshit to keep them "in the loop"… First off not sure who “them” are, but if you’re referring to the people that were in my alliance, have a seat. I am sure I do not need to explain why I would have different expectations and would be completely up front with someone in my alliance (as long as I still trust them) oppose to everyone else in the game. Pretty much 97% of the PM I received and sent that was not personal in nature was shared verbatim with the people in my alliance so they always knew what was up and could make an informed decision for their game. So yeah, I didn’t want to hear any “vague bullsh*t” from someone I trusted and was supporting to win. Especially if the actions (imo) were unexpected based on what was said behind the scenes. Context is everything, so since you missed it or perhaps chose to ignore it because it doesn’t fit your narrative, I was no longer trying to win the game. It was stated in episode 6 and 12, but I made that decision and we discussed it well before. So, imo there is no need to try to set up an alliance member (if that is what happened), if we are supposed to be working for the same goal: they both make it to the finals. I also don't appreciate (unintentionally) being made to look like I was part of plan to backstab an alliance member that I gave my word to and care about. I wanted to better understand what happened to come up with a game plan to keep everyone safe ---as long as they weren’t f*cking around and trying to double cross the other. So yeah, no “vague bullsh*t”. Again, context is everything.
I didn’t think I would have to break that down. But I guess I do.
And then this “Don't wanna make any commitments to people that could potentially conflict with my alliance..
Proceeds to break a final three deal on the first day.. before said alliance was formed….
Spinny spin spin”
Really? You’re telling me you can’t see the difference between those two statements. You really don’t understand why someone would break a deal with someone they can no longer trust because they just told them there was a plan to target them before the game even began oppose to not wanting to comprise an alliance with people that have your back, supports you when sh*t goes sideways and didn’t plan to target you from jump? Okay. Then there is not much to say.
Gotta love the black and white thinking.
Then there was “Didn't PR straight up list who was in her alliance in an earlier video, and tell GC that I was apparently in their alliance??” But gets mad at Effy for saying they are in an alliance?” Oh, is that what happened? Well first off, GC and I never exchanged one PM the entire game, so I not sure when I told her about Dazed being in an alliance with us… Two, I think it’s quite obvious based on a few episodes why it wouldn’t be a good idea to announce or confirm who you are working with since it gives someone the opportunity to put you and your alliance member on the block together. You and Elle even point it out yourselves in your DR. Although it was already briefly explained in the same episode where Effy speaks about this, he also explains why I had a problem with it. The people that were in my alliance understand why this was important for their game. I know I really don’t need to explain that to you, especially since we both know your only goal here is to drag my name. It’s alright. Do your thing. *use some of that salt for my dinner * I just find Dazed and Elle’s insistent need to darg my name every chance they get interesting.
And then there is this “Also.. although I mentioned that I take a lot of PR's advice on dxp..
I can't do that anymore....This game has showed me that ever sentence she speaks is contradictory to the one before it, the one after, and so on. 🙂 “
Lol. No one told you that you should take my advice Mr. “I don’t actually take my own advice when it comes to relationships”… so much for only being able to give advice if we are free of contradictions huh? Apparently, if anyone other than Dazed contradicts themselves, they should keep their advice, knowledge and experience to themselves. O-kay.
Proceeds to break a final three deal on the first day.. before said alliance was formed….
Spinny spin spin”
Really? You’re telling me you can’t see the difference between those two statements. You really don’t understand why someone would break a deal with someone they can no longer trust because they just told them there was a plan to target them before the game even began oppose to not wanting to comprise an alliance with people that have your back, supports you when sh*t goes sideways and didn’t plan to target you from jump? Okay. Then there is not much to say.
Gotta love the black and white thinking.
Then there was “Didn't PR straight up list who was in her alliance in an earlier video, and tell GC that I was apparently in their alliance??” But gets mad at Effy for saying they are in an alliance?” Oh, is that what happened? Well first off, GC and I never exchanged one PM the entire game, so I not sure when I told her about Dazed being in an alliance with us… Two, I think it’s quite obvious based on a few episodes why it wouldn’t be a good idea to announce or confirm who you are working with since it gives someone the opportunity to put you and your alliance member on the block together. You and Elle even point it out yourselves in your DR. Although it was already briefly explained in the same episode where Effy speaks about this, he also explains why I had a problem with it. The people that were in my alliance understand why this was important for their game. I know I really don’t need to explain that to you, especially since we both know your only goal here is to drag my name. It’s alright. Do your thing. *use some of that salt for my dinner * I just find Dazed and Elle’s insistent need to darg my name every chance they get interesting.
And then there is this “Also.. although I mentioned that I take a lot of PR's advice on dxp..
I can't do that anymore....This game has showed me that ever sentence she speaks is contradictory to the one before it, the one after, and so on. 🙂 “
Lol. No one told you that you should take my advice Mr. “I don’t actually take my own advice when it comes to relationships”… so much for only being able to give advice if we are free of contradictions huh? Apparently, if anyone other than Dazed contradicts themselves, they should keep their advice, knowledge and experience to themselves. O-kay.
Then there is “Miss "I don't play personal" PR, got personal and tried to ruin a friendship.”. Well we already covered that above. I am not sure why you think I woke up one day and thought to myself * how can I f*ck up someone's life today? Yes, let’s try to ruin a friendship *. However, let me clarify on what I meant by personal, since I clearly need to translate what the f*ck I type/say from now on---
I don’t do or play personal, meaning--- I do not stoop as low as to call people out of their names just because I’m pissed off about something they say/do. Even at my angriest, I haven’t called anyone out of their name. I know I clearly stated this was what I meant in my DR response, but you want to make it about something else. I may cuss like a trucker, but I have not called someone an idiot, stupid, dumb a**, dense, a cunt, a b*tch, an assh*le, or f*ckers while playing a game. Happens in almost every game. I’ll tell someone to chill the f*ck out, tell them to get the f*ck out here with their nonsense or even tease them, which you all often refer to as me throwing shade----some of you overuse the term and use it incorrectly a lot btw--- but I am sure you can see how that is very different then outright calling someone a name just because I can’t handle my sh*t. Do I take things personal, oh yes I do. That is very different from what I meant and how I answered the question though. But it’s proof I am contradicting myself right?
Oh and to be clear---since again I am sure I will have to translate what the f*ck I mean. Calling someone out of their name does not include giving someone you’re quite fond of a nickname in a teasing tone. You can usually tell the difference between wtf I am talking about up there^^^and a nickname because if the person seems offended by the nickname, you stop using it. Right Musketeers?...I mean they were elite bada** warriors, but whatever. Be upset about that too.
I don’t do or play personal, meaning--- I do not stoop as low as to call people out of their names just because I’m pissed off about something they say/do. Even at my angriest, I haven’t called anyone out of their name. I know I clearly stated this was what I meant in my DR response, but you want to make it about something else. I may cuss like a trucker, but I have not called someone an idiot, stupid, dumb a**, dense, a cunt, a b*tch, an assh*le, or f*ckers while playing a game. Happens in almost every game. I’ll tell someone to chill the f*ck out, tell them to get the f*ck out here with their nonsense or even tease them, which you all often refer to as me throwing shade----some of you overuse the term and use it incorrectly a lot btw--- but I am sure you can see how that is very different then outright calling someone a name just because I can’t handle my sh*t. Do I take things personal, oh yes I do. That is very different from what I meant and how I answered the question though. But it’s proof I am contradicting myself right?
Oh and to be clear---since again I am sure I will have to translate what the f*ck I mean. Calling someone out of their name does not include giving someone you’re quite fond of a nickname in a teasing tone. You can usually tell the difference between wtf I am talking about up there^^^and a nickname because if the person seems offended by the nickname, you stop using it. Right Musketeers?...I mean they were elite bada** warriors, but whatever. Be upset about that too.
What’s irritating me about some of this is Elle and Dazed think they understand my vernacular or how I use certain words, or understand when I am talking in my DRs about an issue however they clearly don’t. Then they run with their misunderstanding as if you know what the f*ck I am talking about and we end up here, in a 3 month old beef. Examples:
“Looks like Mafia jumping on the bandwagon”------“Oh Dazed she’s gunning for you! She’s bringing up an old Mafia beef that has to be about you. She’s guuuuning for you!” (ep 18:04-18:15)…..actually no, it was about the fact that I was being put up to get eliminated every other round and sh*t look staged... My comment (or as Elle likes to call it “shade”) wasn’t directed to a person, it was describing the activity, which is not “shade” btw. Funny since Elle's misunderstanding of what I meant and the statement she made as a result of that misunderstanding was ultimately used as “evidence” to prove I shouldn’t trust her. What a clusterf*ck huh?
“Naw we are not good, but that is outside of this game”------* on board* “The HOH doesn’t know how to keep a past Mafia beef outside of the game”…… “she’s so petty and can’t keep past issue from old games out of this one” and in his DR (ep 4, 15:59-16:23). I already stated what was meant by this statement, so I won’t bother to do it again.
However, let’s get something clear, I do not bring past beefs into the current game I am playing. If I have an issue with any of the players in a game and I know I can’t f*ck with them like that because the issue has not been resolved, I just don’t play the game. Why do you think I stopped playing Mafia for so long? If I can’t f*ck with y’all like that I stay away from you. Period. Gem Moons don’t have the time or patience for predictable drama so we don’t engage. I wouldn’t have built an alliance with Yodi (Minx did me dirty in the last game 🙂) and I wouldn’t have made a deal with Dazed if I was holding onto some past beef. So miss me with the “…until you hold it over someone's head for years (in and OUT of games), all the while claiming you're not like that…” bullsh*t. I’m not sure how ignoring you is the same as holding something over your head. I didn’t continuously bring up what you actually did to our Mafia team time and time again (which is what that phrase actually means). I addressed it once in the Asylum, when you initiated that convo btw and I left it there. Anything else I’ve said to you was about what you were doing in a current game. Btw, when I said “still salty” I was referring to myself, in case that gets twisted too.
“Looks like Mafia jumping on the bandwagon”------“Oh Dazed she’s gunning for you! She’s bringing up an old Mafia beef that has to be about you. She’s guuuuning for you!” (ep 18:04-18:15)…..actually no, it was about the fact that I was being put up to get eliminated every other round and sh*t look staged... My comment (or as Elle likes to call it “shade”) wasn’t directed to a person, it was describing the activity, which is not “shade” btw. Funny since Elle's misunderstanding of what I meant and the statement she made as a result of that misunderstanding was ultimately used as “evidence” to prove I shouldn’t trust her. What a clusterf*ck huh?
“Naw we are not good, but that is outside of this game”------* on board* “The HOH doesn’t know how to keep a past Mafia beef outside of the game”…… “she’s so petty and can’t keep past issue from old games out of this one” and in his DR (ep 4, 15:59-16:23). I already stated what was meant by this statement, so I won’t bother to do it again.
However, let’s get something clear, I do not bring past beefs into the current game I am playing. If I have an issue with any of the players in a game and I know I can’t f*ck with them like that because the issue has not been resolved, I just don’t play the game. Why do you think I stopped playing Mafia for so long? If I can’t f*ck with y’all like that I stay away from you. Period. Gem Moons don’t have the time or patience for predictable drama so we don’t engage. I wouldn’t have built an alliance with Yodi (Minx did me dirty in the last game 🙂) and I wouldn’t have made a deal with Dazed if I was holding onto some past beef. So miss me with the “…until you hold it over someone's head for years (in and OUT of games), all the while claiming you're not like that…” bullsh*t. I’m not sure how ignoring you is the same as holding something over your head. I didn’t continuously bring up what you actually did to our Mafia team time and time again (which is what that phrase actually means). I addressed it once in the Asylum, when you initiated that convo btw and I left it there. Anything else I’ve said to you was about what you were doing in a current game. Btw, when I said “still salty” I was referring to myself, in case that gets twisted too.
I love this one the most since it happened right here in the thread:
My DR: “…So I find it interesting that it’s being spun right now that I use people or walk all over them…you can spin whatever bullsh*t you want…”(ep 7, 29:18-29:39)…..
Elle, “Such bullshit….Dazed wasn’t spinning anything to me because I had him blocked and cut off communication…So where was the spinning coming from?” Oh dear God where did it come from then? Nights tries to clear that up (thanks btw)-----but oh no! It’s “bullsh*t!” because here comes Dazed right on cue with “Glad I have receipts….Glad you saw that the timelines didn't line up…. Because they didn't….I said nothing about my conversation with Elle until AFTER she blocked me on facebook” p.35 … Whitney Houston would be turning in her grave the way you overuse her legendary phrase *pour tea for Whitney*.
He’s right. Dazed didn’t say anything about me using people or walking all over them and I didn’t say that Dazed did say that. Because here’s what happened, since yet again you misunderstood something and jumped all over it….Night tried to get me to share my side of this bullsh*t beef y’all discussed in your DRs and I refused to discuss it. I don’t like to talk about hurtful sh*t. The only thing I was willing to discuss was my deal with Dazed and why it went south and that is what my DR is addressing. That’s it. A very brief summary of what happened. Then there is the magic of editing (not blaming Nights, I’m sure he had hours of bellyaching and ranting to sift through), so when I made the statement above I made the following statement right before it:
“…I suggested to Yodi that we find two additional people that we could trust and we push for top 5….I said top 5 for the obvious reasons, you get as far as you can and then people do what they need to do to win the game. But I had suggested top 5 because I really wanted to still honour my deal with Dazed and include him. For wrong or right, that’s who I am. If I give my word to someone I like to stick to my word as much as I can. And anyone who’s played with me knows that about me…so I find interesting that it’s being spun right now that I use people or walk all over them…you can spin whatever bullsh*t you want…" and no, I was not referring to anything Dazed told me. I was referring to this Elle:
https://imgur.com/a/soVp2i7
Recognize that statement Elle? The one you wrote about me on the game board? You wrote this sh*t about me, but forgot you wrote I guess...but it's "bullsh*t" right? That is what I was talking about, not anything Dazed said to me. Again, to be clear I didn’t say that he did. I have the unedited vocaroo on my phone if you like to confirm.
Lol. Jesus Christ do you see how easily something can get twisted into a bigger deal? Over a misunderstanding of what was meant. Again, I just love how you two assume you know what the f*ck I’m talking about and are so quick to accuse me of lying or something else. This is why I hate typos, even though I believe I made a few. And PMing on my phone did not help.
^^^I have so many more examples in this game and in this thread, but I’ll leave it with these three. See I recognize I made mistakes, misunderstood sh*t in the game and I stated as much when I tried to work through this with you post game, but your reaction up here ^^^ is what I was greeted with when I tried to approach you to sort it out. Too f*cking stubborn to recognize you don’t have all the information and you’re just going off of anger. But do you man. I’m over it.
My DR: “…So I find it interesting that it’s being spun right now that I use people or walk all over them…you can spin whatever bullsh*t you want…”(ep 7, 29:18-29:39)…..
Elle, “Such bullshit….Dazed wasn’t spinning anything to me because I had him blocked and cut off communication…So where was the spinning coming from?” Oh dear God where did it come from then? Nights tries to clear that up (thanks btw)-----but oh no! It’s “bullsh*t!” because here comes Dazed right on cue with “Glad I have receipts….Glad you saw that the timelines didn't line up…. Because they didn't….I said nothing about my conversation with Elle until AFTER she blocked me on facebook” p.35 … Whitney Houston would be turning in her grave the way you overuse her legendary phrase *pour tea for Whitney*.
He’s right. Dazed didn’t say anything about me using people or walking all over them and I didn’t say that Dazed did say that. Because here’s what happened, since yet again you misunderstood something and jumped all over it….Night tried to get me to share my side of this bullsh*t beef y’all discussed in your DRs and I refused to discuss it. I don’t like to talk about hurtful sh*t. The only thing I was willing to discuss was my deal with Dazed and why it went south and that is what my DR is addressing. That’s it. A very brief summary of what happened. Then there is the magic of editing (not blaming Nights, I’m sure he had hours of bellyaching and ranting to sift through), so when I made the statement above I made the following statement right before it:
“…I suggested to Yodi that we find two additional people that we could trust and we push for top 5….I said top 5 for the obvious reasons, you get as far as you can and then people do what they need to do to win the game. But I had suggested top 5 because I really wanted to still honour my deal with Dazed and include him. For wrong or right, that’s who I am. If I give my word to someone I like to stick to my word as much as I can. And anyone who’s played with me knows that about me…so I find interesting that it’s being spun right now that I use people or walk all over them…you can spin whatever bullsh*t you want…" and no, I was not referring to anything Dazed told me. I was referring to this Elle:
https://imgur.com/a/soVp2i7
Recognize that statement Elle? The one you wrote about me on the game board? You wrote this sh*t about me, but forgot you wrote I guess...but it's "bullsh*t" right? That is what I was talking about, not anything Dazed said to me. Again, to be clear I didn’t say that he did. I have the unedited vocaroo on my phone if you like to confirm.
Lol. Jesus Christ do you see how easily something can get twisted into a bigger deal? Over a misunderstanding of what was meant. Again, I just love how you two assume you know what the f*ck I’m talking about and are so quick to accuse me of lying or something else. This is why I hate typos, even though I believe I made a few. And PMing on my phone did not help.
^^^I have so many more examples in this game and in this thread, but I’ll leave it with these three. See I recognize I made mistakes, misunderstood sh*t in the game and I stated as much when I tried to work through this with you post game, but your reaction up here ^^^ is what I was greeted with when I tried to approach you to sort it out. Too f*cking stubborn to recognize you don’t have all the information and you’re just going off of anger. But do you man. I’m over it.
Now, how about we look at some other inconsistencies shall we? First there is the whole “wow…add me to an alliance I had no idea about” and “how can I be in an alliance I knew nothing about”…funny, because Dazed then proceeds to state in his own DR response that he was in an alliance with someone and they had no idea they were in an alliance with him (episode 2, 29:18-29:58) he also mentions it a few more times through out… (episode 2, 16:13-16:23) then you spend18+ pages clearing up the fact that you all weren’t actually in alliance, but simply working with particular players. So did Dazed not put someone in an alliance and they knew nothing about it? Hmph. So it’s okay for Dazed to do it, and when he does it’s labeled “just jumped the gun”, but you can throw that out as an issue when other people do it. Okay. Got it.
I’m not pointing this out to debate if you were in an alliance together or not, personally IDGAF. You all are the only ones that seem pressed about that sh*t. You clearly just misspoke, and it’s not a big deal. However, I point it out to highlight 2 things: 1) the game was chaotic and incorrect sh*t was said in the DRs… it is what it is. I don’t know if it even makes you a hypocrite, just someone that got caught up and misspoke. But if I do it (which I didn’t do), I’m contradicting myself. Or at least that was what you were trying to point out when you called me out on it, no? 2) Your desire to paint me in a particular way and using the miscommunication about an alliance as “proof” is transparent.
And let’s get something straight, that “who was in an alliance and who wasn’t” thing involving you was cleared up very quickly in one of my DR responses (episode 8, 5:23-6:52) making a clear distinction that Dazed was included in the top 5 because of our deal, but he was not in an alliance with Effy, Champ, Yodi, or myself. I explained that they were just allowing me to honour my deal and not target Dazed and that was why they didn’t target Dazed either until we made it to top 5.
I’m not pointing this out to debate if you were in an alliance together or not, personally IDGAF. You all are the only ones that seem pressed about that sh*t. You clearly just misspoke, and it’s not a big deal. However, I point it out to highlight 2 things: 1) the game was chaotic and incorrect sh*t was said in the DRs… it is what it is. I don’t know if it even makes you a hypocrite, just someone that got caught up and misspoke. But if I do it (which I didn’t do), I’m contradicting myself. Or at least that was what you were trying to point out when you called me out on it, no? 2) Your desire to paint me in a particular way and using the miscommunication about an alliance as “proof” is transparent.
And let’s get something straight, that “who was in an alliance and who wasn’t” thing involving you was cleared up very quickly in one of my DR responses (episode 8, 5:23-6:52) making a clear distinction that Dazed was included in the top 5 because of our deal, but he was not in an alliance with Effy, Champ, Yodi, or myself. I explained that they were just allowing me to honour my deal and not target Dazed and that was why they didn’t target Dazed either until we made it to top 5.
Then there is this “Dazed and Phoenix set the tone for the whole” bullsh*t I want to address. Let’s get something perfectly clear. I did not step into the game, take a look around to see who was playing on day f*ckin one and then decide whom my targets were going to be “from jump” (ep 3, 7:35-7:51). You did that Elle . And why? Because you don’t like StillWater’s personality and because Yodi apparently told you to say something out of pocket to someone on DXP while we were playing the alphabet soup game (btw what the hell did those letters stand for Nights?). I was playing that game as well, and here’s the thing… I was told to say some hurtful things to DXP members as well, but I chose not to cross that line. It’s a f*ckin game. I didn’t think winning a game was worth hurting someone’s feelings by insulting them. You had a choice, just like we all did, but you want to blame Yodi for “making” you say something f*cked up to someone else and then use that as a reason for why you target her in the BB DXP game. Okay…I digress.
The reason people did not want to play with you was not because of any tone I set. I can completely own I have absolutely no chill when I am upset. I can also admit and own the fact that my lack of chill negatively impacted how you felt about me and your level of enjoyment of a game, the feeling was mutual, trust---but I was not the reason some players did want to work with you. You heard yourself from day one, for whatever reason a fair amount of people wanted you out of the game. I didn’t go to them with that focus. I didn’t have any targets in mind when we started this game, so that had nothing to with me during the earlier part of the game. My comment about the 3 Musketeers was made after I made my nominations and after I found out about the target on my back.
I clearly talk about the veto in my DR response, which indicates when I made the 3 Musketeers comment. So I had no plans to target anyone and didn’t identify anyone as I clearly stated when I first won HOH (episode 2, 17:17-18:07), while you did. I eventually told my alliance that you were targeting me when one member was suggesting I join forces with you and showed me a message you had sent, which I received after I already nominated you (e.g. “Effy’s Angels” ring a bell?). I said no, “I’d rather not” and left it at that. When the issue was pushed a bit more and I was called paranoid for not trusting you, I then stated, “Look, Elle is part the plan to target me I told you about. I am not working with her”. Didn’t elaborate. When sh*t went sideways I shared more. And despite me saying I would not work with you that clearly didn’t prevent Effy and Yodi from reaching out to you, now did it? So miss me with the “Phoenix set everyone against me” bullsh*t.
I didn’t make any deals with anyone to put you on the block in exchange for not putting them on the block, but you did that with Stillwater to get me on the block. And when the deal didn’t go as you hoped and planned for, I wasn’t the one that tried to call Stillwater out on the game board to try to make her look untrustworthy. I get it, you don’t like her, however it was that move that made many give you the side eye.
The reason people did not want to play with you was not because of any tone I set. I can completely own I have absolutely no chill when I am upset. I can also admit and own the fact that my lack of chill negatively impacted how you felt about me and your level of enjoyment of a game, the feeling was mutual, trust---but I was not the reason some players did want to work with you. You heard yourself from day one, for whatever reason a fair amount of people wanted you out of the game. I didn’t go to them with that focus. I didn’t have any targets in mind when we started this game, so that had nothing to with me during the earlier part of the game. My comment about the 3 Musketeers was made after I made my nominations and after I found out about the target on my back.
I clearly talk about the veto in my DR response, which indicates when I made the 3 Musketeers comment. So I had no plans to target anyone and didn’t identify anyone as I clearly stated when I first won HOH (episode 2, 17:17-18:07), while you did. I eventually told my alliance that you were targeting me when one member was suggesting I join forces with you and showed me a message you had sent, which I received after I already nominated you (e.g. “Effy’s Angels” ring a bell?). I said no, “I’d rather not” and left it at that. When the issue was pushed a bit more and I was called paranoid for not trusting you, I then stated, “Look, Elle is part the plan to target me I told you about. I am not working with her”. Didn’t elaborate. When sh*t went sideways I shared more. And despite me saying I would not work with you that clearly didn’t prevent Effy and Yodi from reaching out to you, now did it? So miss me with the “Phoenix set everyone against me” bullsh*t.
I didn’t make any deals with anyone to put you on the block in exchange for not putting them on the block, but you did that with Stillwater to get me on the block. And when the deal didn’t go as you hoped and planned for, I wasn’t the one that tried to call Stillwater out on the game board to try to make her look untrustworthy. I get it, you don’t like her, however it was that move that made many give you the side eye.
Granted, some people wanted you out early, but you set the tone for people not wanting to work with you because as soon as you felt the sandbox was getting too hot, you decided “well now no one else can play in the sandbox either” and took a piss in it. Take a piss (since my vernacular is often misunderstood apparently) refers to when you and Dazed proceeded to drown the game board with all sorts of lukewarm tea with the intention of ruining each other’s game (and mine and Stillwater’s game too). “…So, you and everyone else knows…. he and Phoenix have a deal.…” assuming they didn’t already f*cking know because you think I’m the type of person that would build an alliance with someone and not be upfront with the people in my alliance. I want to make sure I highlight “alliance” to make it clear that I am talking about 3 people (Yodi, Champ and Effy), not the other people that thought they were in an alliance with me, or the person that informed me he was targeting me after we made a deal. I made it clear from the day we joined forces that I was committed to these 3 people and them alone and I tried to uphold that as best as I could. Sh*t happens and it wasn’t possible for everyone * splash some Henny for Effy*.
Like I said in my DR it happens every f*ckin time in most of these games, so I knew that sh*t was coming at some point. People don't like how something is playing out in the game, they don’t address it with the person after the game, they try to sabotage their game by dropping information on the game board. Going back and forth for pages and pages to one up the other while the game is in progress. And before anyone fixes their fingers to type any sideway bullsh*t about me revealing stuff in the DR, I am sure we can all see how that is very different, no? We all knew the DR responses would not be revealed until after the game was over. You drowning the whole god d*mn game board with tea impacts the game while it is in progress. Big difference.
Like I said in my DR it happens every f*ckin time in most of these games, so I knew that sh*t was coming at some point. People don't like how something is playing out in the game, they don’t address it with the person after the game, they try to sabotage their game by dropping information on the game board. Going back and forth for pages and pages to one up the other while the game is in progress. And before anyone fixes their fingers to type any sideway bullsh*t about me revealing stuff in the DR, I am sure we can all see how that is very different, no? We all knew the DR responses would not be revealed until after the game was over. You drowning the whole god d*mn game board with tea impacts the game while it is in progress. Big difference.
So you own that Elle. I’ll own my own sh*t. I will own riling you up because I couldn’t chill the f*ck out and misunderstood what was dropped in my lap, let my emotions take over, unintentionally f*cking up timelines and not making it crystal clear what the f*ck I was referring to in my PM to you. I will not however own you losing your sh*t and feeling the need to sabotage other people’s game by spilling tea on the board while the game was in progress; showing other people as soon as sandbox gets too hot you don’t want anyone else to play in the sandbox, so you try to ruin their game. Some felt comfortable enough to highlight it in their DR responses, so I didn’t just pull this out of thin air…Yet, I am the reason no one wanted to work with you? Okay.
Then there is this bs: “…PR was gunning for me, she didn't make a deal with me like she did Dazed. It's quite obvious she made everyone believe that me being a target was a good idea and their idea and not hers.”
I’ll give you this, I was gunning for you. I wanted you gone, however that was after I thought there was a plan to take me out of the game, and most certainly after I read the last PM where I found out you were urging Dazed to take me out and I thought you were taking my feelings for a f*cking joke. I told you I wouldn’t vote to evict you or target you on March 3, that was the same deal Dazed had. Then sh*t changed when I found out new information. Imagine that, sh*t can change in a Scorpio’s black and white world. You have a Mars in Scorp as well, so you know exactly how we handle things once it’s activated. We do not stop until we accomplish what the f*ck we set out to do. Isn’t that right? Not unlike when you stated you were making it your goal to take me out of the game. That was your only focus, isn’t that what you kept saying on the game board, so miss me with the “Phoenix was gunning for me” bullsh*t too. You said you wanted to come for me, so I let you know exactly what happens if you choose to come for me and I find out before you get the chance.
As for the rest, I’m gonna really need you to take a whole stadium full of seats with that bullsh*t. While you're at it I would like you to identify one person that can confirm that I even hinted you should be a target first in our dialogue. Two people I didn’t even talk to the entire game. One person asked me my thoughts, even asked me whom to nominate, I didn’t say your name (had no idea of any past beef between the two of you either, so that would have been an easy one, but alas…) the only advice I gave her was the basics on how to make a good decision and see who she can trust for her game. Based on how that unfolded you were bound to go on the block anyways apparently….so miss me with that. The other person I didn’t say much beyond “no you’re not a target for me” until she was put on the block and her targets were clear, you weren’t one. Never suggested that it should be you instead. That leaves my alliance. Well isn't that the point of joining forces with other people? So we have each other's back and take out anyone that will target someone in the group? Why even make a top 5 then? As for my alliance, I’m not gonna go out of my way to identify what was said there, but everyone in my alliance knows the truth to that statement and whether or not I made them (sorry “everyone”) believe that you being a target was their idea.
Then there is this bs: “…PR was gunning for me, she didn't make a deal with me like she did Dazed. It's quite obvious she made everyone believe that me being a target was a good idea and their idea and not hers.”
I’ll give you this, I was gunning for you. I wanted you gone, however that was after I thought there was a plan to take me out of the game, and most certainly after I read the last PM where I found out you were urging Dazed to take me out and I thought you were taking my feelings for a f*cking joke. I told you I wouldn’t vote to evict you or target you on March 3, that was the same deal Dazed had. Then sh*t changed when I found out new information. Imagine that, sh*t can change in a Scorpio’s black and white world. You have a Mars in Scorp as well, so you know exactly how we handle things once it’s activated. We do not stop until we accomplish what the f*ck we set out to do. Isn’t that right? Not unlike when you stated you were making it your goal to take me out of the game. That was your only focus, isn’t that what you kept saying on the game board, so miss me with the “Phoenix was gunning for me” bullsh*t too. You said you wanted to come for me, so I let you know exactly what happens if you choose to come for me and I find out before you get the chance.
As for the rest, I’m gonna really need you to take a whole stadium full of seats with that bullsh*t. While you're at it I would like you to identify one person that can confirm that I even hinted you should be a target first in our dialogue. Two people I didn’t even talk to the entire game. One person asked me my thoughts, even asked me whom to nominate, I didn’t say your name (had no idea of any past beef between the two of you either, so that would have been an easy one, but alas…) the only advice I gave her was the basics on how to make a good decision and see who she can trust for her game. Based on how that unfolded you were bound to go on the block anyways apparently….so miss me with that. The other person I didn’t say much beyond “no you’re not a target for me” until she was put on the block and her targets were clear, you weren’t one. Never suggested that it should be you instead. That leaves my alliance. Well isn't that the point of joining forces with other people? So we have each other's back and take out anyone that will target someone in the group? Why even make a top 5 then? As for my alliance, I’m not gonna go out of my way to identify what was said there, but everyone in my alliance knows the truth to that statement and whether or not I made them (sorry “everyone”) believe that you being a target was their idea.
Finally, the word “spinning” has been used a lot, often in reference to me and my DR responses. Well a note on “spinning”…What I find interesting about this term “spinning” is for various reason most of us have summarized things in our DRs responses. This was largely for the purpose of time and because emotions are running high. Not to mention things have been said based on our perception of events, our interpretation of the question that was asked and it has been shaped by our use of language.
For example:
I noticed that when Dazed and Elle were retelling the conflict that happened between us that they relayed the events using particular terms/words and they paraphrased what they actually wrote to me. They also said I made certain statements when I did not. Perfect example, when Elle is retelling what happened when I first messaged her, she completely leaves out what she actually said to me that contributed to me being pissed off and then she says “well, you put me on the block…the least you can do is tell me who stabbed me in the back…so she tells me that Dazed told her that. That Dazed messaged her and said that I was gunning for her” (episode 3, 7:10-7:24). My screenshot clearly show I didn’t say that.
Also there was no message from me telling Elle “verbatim” that she said something about my Mafia comment. I already covered why there is no way I could have “repeated conversations that were said in messenger” and told her this “verbatim”, because I didn’t even know about it at the time. The only thing Dazed sent me at this point of our convo was his statement that he would not hesitate to pull the trigger on me when he got the chance, and that is what I told Elle. Now that may be what Elle meant and she was mixing up the information herself, but that is not what she quoted me as saying when she referenced what I said to her “verbatim”.
Then there is the fact that the events that happened over a 7 day period were summarized in one statement. Time lines are thrown off…I get it and it’s really is not that big of a deal tbh. Not to me. I am not gonna get too hung up on how you described what happened in your DR responses. I’m not here ranting after every episode, for 50+ pages that you’re spinning this and what a load of bulls*t that is in reference to your DR responses, because I can appreciate the fact that the responses in your DRs are going to be influenced by your emotions, your understanding of the messages you received, time limit and editing ---- My point is, aside from me pointing out the blatant double standard, I’m not jumping down your god d*mn throat over every little error you say in your DRs on every f*cking page. However, when I summarize in my DR responses, I am “spinning”. Okay. I’m beginning to see a theme here…
For example:
I noticed that when Dazed and Elle were retelling the conflict that happened between us that they relayed the events using particular terms/words and they paraphrased what they actually wrote to me. They also said I made certain statements when I did not. Perfect example, when Elle is retelling what happened when I first messaged her, she completely leaves out what she actually said to me that contributed to me being pissed off and then she says “well, you put me on the block…the least you can do is tell me who stabbed me in the back…so she tells me that Dazed told her that. That Dazed messaged her and said that I was gunning for her” (episode 3, 7:10-7:24). My screenshot clearly show I didn’t say that.
Also there was no message from me telling Elle “verbatim” that she said something about my Mafia comment. I already covered why there is no way I could have “repeated conversations that were said in messenger” and told her this “verbatim”, because I didn’t even know about it at the time. The only thing Dazed sent me at this point of our convo was his statement that he would not hesitate to pull the trigger on me when he got the chance, and that is what I told Elle. Now that may be what Elle meant and she was mixing up the information herself, but that is not what she quoted me as saying when she referenced what I said to her “verbatim”.
Then there is the fact that the events that happened over a 7 day period were summarized in one statement. Time lines are thrown off…I get it and it’s really is not that big of a deal tbh. Not to me. I am not gonna get too hung up on how you described what happened in your DR responses. I’m not here ranting after every episode, for 50+ pages that you’re spinning this and what a load of bulls*t that is in reference to your DR responses, because I can appreciate the fact that the responses in your DRs are going to be influenced by your emotions, your understanding of the messages you received, time limit and editing ---- My point is, aside from me pointing out the blatant double standard, I’m not jumping down your god d*mn throat over every little error you say in your DRs on every f*cking page. However, when I summarize in my DR responses, I am “spinning”. Okay. I’m beginning to see a theme here…
You can be influenced by your emotions and you can summarize how things played out in your DRs, misquote me and it’s fact, but if I do, it is “spinning”. Okay.
When other people started playing the game and decided they wanted you to be evicted because it’s best for their game, you’re being targeted. How unfair! Yet, as soon as you saw who was in the game on day 1, based on your own words you reach out to each other and discussed who your targets were going to be before the first HOH comp even began (episode 7, 15:55-16:20), but somehow that’s different and you get to bellyache about it for pages and pages. Okay.
Stillwater and Yodi weren’t in an alliance and they didn’t complain when that was assumed by other people that they were. I was never in an alliance with GC. She and I didn’t exchange 1 PM the entire game, yet I didn’t feel the need to discuss it for 18+ pages about how dare you say I was in an alliance with GC! No one else is pressed by these misunderstandings and assumptions except…. Hmmmmm. For 18+ pages. Okay.
Dazed can call me out for supposedly telling GC about him being in an alliance that he wasn’t a part of (which I didn’t do), and because I was bothered by someone potentially risking the game for all of the member in the alliance by identifying their names, it’s hypocrisy! But if Dazed puts someone in an alliance they know nothing about, he “jumped the gun” and it was just a mistake. Okay.
Dazed and Elle can misunderstand what they read constantly and they are allowed to respond emotionally…their misunderstandings are excused, but if I misunderstand something I’ve read and I respond emotionally, it’s something much more nefarious * muah ha ha….. * Okay.
Elle can be genuinely upset and hurt that someone she “considers a friend” would “turn” on her early in the game, and declares “war”, but the fact that I was upset about learning that two people I care about had a discussion about targeting me before the game began….amongst other things…oh no that isn’t reason enough for me to be genuinely upset and hurt or the motive behind me putting Elle on the block. It was all about strategy to “ruin a friendship”. Okay.
^^^And to be very clear, I am not making light of Elle’s feelings being hurt (or Dazed for that matter). I know exactly how it feels when you think someone you’re cool with, and you genuinely care for “turns on you”. I am just highlighting how they automatically jumped to the conclusion that I intended to harm them and this wasn’t about the fact that I was also hurt and reacted. And when I come to you to sort it out post game, I’m “spinning” bullsh*t. Okay.
….What’s most interesting about these last 2 points is the fact that I discussed every step and strategic move I wanted to make and made with the people in my alliance, but I didn’t discuss this one crucial piece of “strategy” with them? The one strategic move that apparently set the tone for the game? Really? Okay. Maybe that’s because it wasn’t a strategy.
When other people started playing the game and decided they wanted you to be evicted because it’s best for their game, you’re being targeted. How unfair! Yet, as soon as you saw who was in the game on day 1, based on your own words you reach out to each other and discussed who your targets were going to be before the first HOH comp even began (episode 7, 15:55-16:20), but somehow that’s different and you get to bellyache about it for pages and pages. Okay.
Stillwater and Yodi weren’t in an alliance and they didn’t complain when that was assumed by other people that they were. I was never in an alliance with GC. She and I didn’t exchange 1 PM the entire game, yet I didn’t feel the need to discuss it for 18+ pages about how dare you say I was in an alliance with GC! No one else is pressed by these misunderstandings and assumptions except…. Hmmmmm. For 18+ pages. Okay.
Dazed can call me out for supposedly telling GC about him being in an alliance that he wasn’t a part of (which I didn’t do), and because I was bothered by someone potentially risking the game for all of the member in the alliance by identifying their names, it’s hypocrisy! But if Dazed puts someone in an alliance they know nothing about, he “jumped the gun” and it was just a mistake. Okay.
Dazed and Elle can misunderstand what they read constantly and they are allowed to respond emotionally…their misunderstandings are excused, but if I misunderstand something I’ve read and I respond emotionally, it’s something much more nefarious * muah ha ha….. * Okay.
Elle can be genuinely upset and hurt that someone she “considers a friend” would “turn” on her early in the game, and declares “war”, but the fact that I was upset about learning that two people I care about had a discussion about targeting me before the game began….amongst other things…oh no that isn’t reason enough for me to be genuinely upset and hurt or the motive behind me putting Elle on the block. It was all about strategy to “ruin a friendship”. Okay.
^^^And to be very clear, I am not making light of Elle’s feelings being hurt (or Dazed for that matter). I know exactly how it feels when you think someone you’re cool with, and you genuinely care for “turns on you”. I am just highlighting how they automatically jumped to the conclusion that I intended to harm them and this wasn’t about the fact that I was also hurt and reacted. And when I come to you to sort it out post game, I’m “spinning” bullsh*t. Okay.
….What’s most interesting about these last 2 points is the fact that I discussed every step and strategic move I wanted to make and made with the people in my alliance, but I didn’t discuss this one crucial piece of “strategy” with them? The one strategic move that apparently set the tone for the game? Really? Okay. Maybe that’s because it wasn’t a strategy.
OMG the list goes on. Point being there were various things that contribute to what played out. It’s not so black and white. You do not have the whole picture, but you’re running with everything I say in my DR and highlighting it as “proof” that I am exactly who you think I am. You want to paint me in a particular way to suit your narrative of what you believe I did to you when the whole situation (my role included) reads like a comedy of errors. No one else is going on for 50+ pages about how much they were wronged despite how things played out for them. Other than a few exchanges with a few people, no one else is posting about your obvious contradictions for 50+ pages after every episode is posted. I don't even come close to you two despite my series of long a** posts for 3 pages...
Elle wrote a nice harmony speech on DXP a few months ago about how she can now understand why people found her need to back and forth for days and days so annoying...and trust her “this won't matter 5 years from now”, yet….50+ pages later….
I’m okay with my “contradictions” if we are going with what you laid out as “proof” of such. I can admit I made a number of mistakes at various point in the game, namely allowing my emotions to get the best of me and using way too much vernacular and lazy/sloppy writing in my post/PMs, apparently.
Anyway, it finally stopped raining so I’m going to go back to play outside, so you can continue to drag my name. It looks good on you. And I can take it now, since the words---from two people I genuinely cared for and would not intentionally hurt by trying to ruin their friendship----has no impact on me anymore. I love having an air moon. Get the champagne ready for the remaining episodes. I know you’re waiting for it.
Elle wrote a nice harmony speech on DXP a few months ago about how she can now understand why people found her need to back and forth for days and days so annoying...and trust her “this won't matter 5 years from now”, yet….50+ pages later….
I’m okay with my “contradictions” if we are going with what you laid out as “proof” of such. I can admit I made a number of mistakes at various point in the game, namely allowing my emotions to get the best of me and using way too much vernacular and lazy/sloppy writing in my post/PMs, apparently.
Anyway, it finally stopped raining so I’m going to go back to play outside, so you can continue to drag my name. It looks good on you. And I can take it now, since the words---from two people I genuinely cared for and would not intentionally hurt by trying to ruin their friendship----has no impact on me anymore. I love having an air moon. Get the champagne ready for the remaining episodes. I know you’re waiting for it.
PS
Nights, props I’m not sure how you found the patience to sift through our rants and all the bellyaching. Amazing job! Thanks for keeping sh*t spicy with those edits lol. As emotionally stressful as this was to sit back and constantly bite my tongue, I secretly love that you unintentionally triggering those lovely comments about me on the thread. Definitely not mad at you.
17:57-18:20
UVD, you are adorable! Nights I was dyyyyyyyyying DY-ING watching that gif while UVD was explaining her alliance. Btw, UVD I understood exactly what and whom you were referring to. When you were laying it out Nights was probably thinking….so teeeeeechnically, they’re all working together but don’t know it lol.
Yodi (Minx---new nickname btw) *fist bump*, you know why I had to go in on you ma. You know that’s how we handle sh*t when trust is (temporarily) lost. Others well… stew and fake nice. Still have mad love for you. I am sorry.
Effy, I know we already addressed it and I appreciate that you found my DR humorous. Gems always get me and my sassy mouth since apparently a lot of other people do not. Despite the heat in my belly at times, I swear I was also laughing my a** off every single time you dropped something new in my lap. Yodi can confirm this. You kept me on my toes and you kept the game fun behind the scenes despite the drama. You were a great teammate.
Champ…. ❤
Nights, props I’m not sure how you found the patience to sift through our rants and all the bellyaching. Amazing job! Thanks for keeping sh*t spicy with those edits lol. As emotionally stressful as this was to sit back and constantly bite my tongue, I secretly love that you unintentionally triggering those lovely comments about me on the thread. Definitely not mad at you.
17:57-18:20
UVD, you are adorable! Nights I was dyyyyyyyyying DY-ING watching that gif while UVD was explaining her alliance. Btw, UVD I understood exactly what and whom you were referring to. When you were laying it out Nights was probably thinking….so teeeeeechnically, they’re all working together but don’t know it lol.
Yodi (Minx---new nickname btw) *fist bump*, you know why I had to go in on you ma. You know that’s how we handle sh*t when trust is (temporarily) lost. Others well… stew and fake nice. Still have mad love for you. I am sorry.
Effy, I know we already addressed it and I appreciate that you found my DR humorous. Gems always get me and my sassy mouth since apparently a lot of other people do not. Despite the heat in my belly at times, I swear I was also laughing my a** off every single time you dropped something new in my lap. Yodi can confirm this. You kept me on my toes and you kept the game fun behind the scenes despite the drama. You were a great teammate.
Champ…. ❤
PPS
GC, my most valuable (even though we were never in an) alliance member, I wish I had reach out you earlier in the game. I’m taking notes ma.
Stillwater, thanks for having my back with that whole Dazed and Elle deal to put me on the block, even tough I didn't know you had my back lol. Appreciated. You are genuinely a sweet person and far from a dunce even though a lot of sh*t has been thrown your way. There was one moment in particular in the game that made me laugh. You may hear about it soon I think (I stopped watching a while ago). If not, ask Nights at the end.
As a side note, in respect to telling people not to talk to you, I actually told my alliance we should be careful about what we say to you in the game and we should keep our distance for a bit when we thought you were working with Dazed after you nominated Elle and all that tea was spilled on the board. It was said to protect the alliance, but it is what it is. Misperceptions about people’s intentions made the game so crazy (and fun if crazy is how you define “fun”).
*Deuces *
GC, my most valuable (even though we were never in an) alliance member, I wish I had reach out you earlier in the game. I’m taking notes ma.
Stillwater, thanks for having my back with that whole Dazed and Elle deal to put me on the block, even tough I didn't know you had my back lol. Appreciated. You are genuinely a sweet person and far from a dunce even though a lot of sh*t has been thrown your way. There was one moment in particular in the game that made me laugh. You may hear about it soon I think (I stopped watching a while ago). If not, ask Nights at the end.
As a side note, in respect to telling people not to talk to you, I actually told my alliance we should be careful about what we say to you in the game and we should keep our distance for a bit when we thought you were working with Dazed after you nominated Elle and all that tea was spilled on the board. It was said to protect the alliance, but it is what it is. Misperceptions about people’s intentions made the game so crazy (and fun if crazy is how you define “fun”).
*Deuces *
Posted by PhoenixRising
but more importantly it allows him to stay in the game without resorting to backstabbing me because I knew I would have really personalized that sh*t and we would be right back where we were a year ago.
Bitter Betty finally admits that her entire beef with me for years, is because she took a game too personal.
Constantly trashing my integrity OUTSIDE of games, making of snide remarks, Dazed can't be trusted, etc..
Please stop playing games like this and mafia.
You're not built for it.
Posted by PhoenixRisingOkay. Whatever. Phrasing and the words we use is everything I am beginning to realize with you two.Had I said * in my work voice * “Elle, sent me a sacred PM, on March 2, 2019 which described a cunning plan to save her from eviction if she did not win the golden power of veto….This PM also stated that my teammates and I were planning to form an alliance with her…” would you remember the PM then? Are you really hung up on the word “approached”? * eye roll*.
The irony that is the last 3 pages of this thread, full of YOUR misunderstanding one small PM from me. *eye roll*
Posted by PhoenixRising
Then there is “PR: I'm not into this vague bullshit. Tell me exactly what your thoughts are.
Also PR: Gives everyone just enough vague bullshit to keep them "in the loop"… First off not sure who “them” are, but if you’re referring to the people that were in my alliance, have a seat. I am sure I do not need to explain why I would have different expectations and would be completely up front with someone in my alliance (as long as I still trust them) oppose to everyone else in the game. Pretty much 97% of the PM I received and sent that was not personal in nature was shared verbatim with the people in my alliance so they always knew what was up and could make an informed decision for their game. So yeah, I didn’t want to hear any “vague bullsh*t” from someone I trusted and was supporting to win. Especially if the actions (imo) were unexpected based on what was said behind the scenes. Context is everything, so since you missed it or perhaps chose to ignore it because it doesn’t fit your narrative, I was no longer trying to win the game. It was stated in episode 6 and 12, but I made that decision and we discussed it well before. So, imo there is no need to try to set up an alliance member (if that is what happened), if we are supposed to be working for the same goal: they both make it to the finals. I also don't appreciate (unintentionally) being made to look like I was part of plan to backstab an alliance member that I gave my word to and care about. I wanted to better understand what happened to come up with a game plan to keep everyone safe ---as long as they weren’t f*cking around and trying to double cross the other. So yeah, no “vague bullsh*t”. Again, context is everything.
I didn’t think I would have to break that down. But I guess I do.
Conspiring behind Effy's back and UVD's back. I'm guessing this is why Yodi eventually made a power move to get you put on the block. You were the one making the moves behind the scenes to get people out.
I would respect you more if you simply owned up to what you were doing. It's Big Brother ffs.
Posted by PhoenixRising
And then this “Don't wanna make any commitments to people that could potentially conflict with my alliance..
Proceeds to break a final three deal on the first day.. before said alliance was formed….
Spinny spin spin”
Really? You’re telling me you can’t see the difference between those two statements. You really don’t understand why someone would break a deal with someone they can no longer trust because they just told them there was a plan to target them before the game even began oppose to not wanting to comprise an alliance with people that have your back, supports you when sh*t goes sideways and didn’t plan to target you from jump? Okay. Then there is not much to say.
Gotta love the black and white thinking.
You really can't understand why someone would come clean about seeing you as a target BEFORE making a deal? Maybe to instill trust?
What came first? Our deal and me confessing? Or the Alliance you joined AFTER the fact?
Gotta love the black and white thinking *eye roll*
Posted by PhoenixRising
Then there was “Didn't PR straight up list who was in her alliance in an earlier video, and tell GC that I was apparently in their alliance??” But gets mad at Effy for saying they are in an alliance?” Oh, is that what happened? Well first off, GC and I never exchanged one PM the entire game, so I not sure when I told her about Dazed being in an alliance with us… Two, I think it’s quite obvious based on a few episodes why it wouldn’t be a good idea to announce or confirm who you are working with since it gives someone the opportunity to put you and your alliance member on the block together. You and Elle even point it out yourselves in your DR. Although it was already briefly explained in the same episode where Effy speaks about this, he also explains why I had a problem with it. The people that were in my alliance understand why this was important for their game. I know I really don’t need to explain that to you, especially since we both know your only goal here is to drag my name. It’s alright. Do your thing. *use some of that salt for my dinner * I just find Dazed and Elle’s insistent need to darg my name every chance they get interesting.
There is LITERALLY an entire episode of people discussing the formation of said alliance, with me somehow being added as a plus 1. You're telling me you had no discussions in this?
Posted by PhoenixRising
And then there is this “Also.. although I mentioned that I take a lot of PR's advice on dxp..
I can't do that anymore.
This game has showed me that ever sentence she speaks is contradictory to the one before it, the one after, and so on. 🙂 “
Lol. No one told you that you should take my advice Mr. “I don’t actually take my own advice when it comes to relationships”… so much for only being able to give advice if we are free of contradictions huh? Apparently, if anyone other than Dazed contradicts themselves, they should keep their advice, knowledge and experience to themselves. O-kay.
Read my tagline..
"Biggest Hypocrite on DXP"
1. Difference between you and I.. is I admit it.
2. As an audience member to this game, I am entitled to my opinion to how I interpret other player's DR. Point. Blank. Period.
Don't take it so personal.
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Hi, this is a follow on from my previous thread, my sag sun Venus cap ex I’m still trying to figure out. So we have been apart officially for 2 weeks but haven’t seen each other for a week, I haven’t chased her either but she has text me and I have replie
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HELP ME SLAY HER
@_@
I don't mind if you aren't a pisces, men in general can answer, but do note if you are a pisces.
For my ladies, let me know how you'd feel if you've dated a fishy.
I am casually dating presently but before I was focused on one guy - fishy with a sag mo
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Anywho, my Sag and I decided to make a sex playlist...decided to ask you weirdos here on dxp what songs you'd add to a sex playlist cause why not, F it
just an observation.
2nd house, earth signs placements ranked by level of most to least likely (cap,taurus,virgo). cancer moon (sometimes).
and Sag placements! (notably male gold diggers)
there's something about Sag sun/moon/venus/mars and being a chea
..
This is supposed to be our shining year, but I see a lot of Sagittarians not happy. One just lost her job, and the others are depressed and not living their best lives. I am doing okay as of right now, but should I be worried?
So I'm not sure if you guys remember me telling you about this fairytale of a non existent love story or not. But back in February of 2016 I met this bartender. He gave me his number and then I used it once and he messaged me back but i never messaged him
Now till August 11
I’m seem to always end up in relationships with earth signs. My longest relationship was with a Virgo. Second was with a Taurus.
All positive feedback is welcome. Thanks.
Rising Virgo
Moon Cap
Sun Sag
Venus Sag
Mars Sag
Curious to know...
I think it’s possible for water 💦 & 🔥 fire sign to be together.
How all the sags doing this year with this Jupiter shining on us as the first quarter of the year is almost over?
Me? Job is going well. Just started a project that I’m basically leading, so hopefully job security and a raise. Things have calmed down as
Do you agree or disagree, why or why? I'm all ears...
I have been talking to a Sag for quite some time. He always goes wild when he sees a mean girl. Like on tv or in person.
But when it comes to me standing up for myself or being bossy (which I naturally am due to my being a cardinal sign) he withdraws and
If you're anything like me, you internalize most of what you feel; leaving others in the dark, and robbing yourself of raw experiences...and/or clarity...or closure.
Even if they're not on DXP, feel free to release your ambiguous message here.
My ambi
Hello to you all dear Goats,
As of late, I have been with a Goat Gent. :D
This is his chart -
Goat Sun
Bull Moon
Sag Merc
Goat Venus
Bull Mars
From the very beginning he was very up front about what he was looking for and that he wanted to commit to
So normally as a saggy moon i do not let my emotions take over for too long but since a month i have been going crazy overindulging alcohol sex,drugs and shit smoking where as i never smoked ... i hope this is a phase because i am really through things ri
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The tricky part here is that I previously had a relationship with this guy and the mom
K