Wineaux15
@Wineaux15
8 Years1,000+ Posts
Comments: 65 · Posts: 1066 · Topics: 13
How to Grieve
I'm sorry to hear about your sister. Tragic.
Ways to grieve: painting, writing, coloring books, yoga, food, walking.
Ways to grieve: painting, writing, coloring books, yoga, food, walking.
Everyone grieves differently.
Some people find hope in death and approach it with childlike enthusiasm, others cry for days.
There is no wrong or right way.
Some people find hope in death and approach it with childlike enthusiasm, others cry for days.
There is no wrong or right way.
Posted by HaziiFlo
Remember the day you told me that you wish you could be that emotionally open as I was.. this is the time. Don’t fear what people will think of you because they’re not dealing with your pain and grief. Cry, let it out.. find something that is healing to YOU. If you’re not in the mood to get dressed up, you don’t have too. If you’re a bit moody weepy and depressed, let it happen. Don’t hold it in and don’t think about what to do next, this is the time to use those feelings you have buried inside and reflect on them. You’re not obligated to give anyone an explanation. You have to face your inner demons sometimes to move forward. I know it hurts bad and I’m sorry for your loss, but you are strong and you will get through this. I’m glad you told us how you’re feeling.. the way I view is, you need to self destruct to create something new and beautiful no matter how ugly the process can be.
This I understand. I’m typically theone all dolled up and I’ve been wanting to stay in the house in my pjs but I can’t because I’ve been planning the funeral but when I’m home I come in my room, drink wine, and read dxp just because some stuff on here distracts me... not sure why.
Sorry for your loss Wineaux. Stay strong.
Thank you guys.
Posted by HaziiFloYou’re so good at describing and naming the emotions that I can’t find the words for. Thanks girlie. I’ll reach out to you if I need to through PM.Posted by Wineaux15Know that if you need to talk, I’m here for you. I will keep what we said close to my heart.. I hear people’s stories everyday and bring them comfort because it makes me happy to do so, I want to do that for you. If dxp craziness distracts you, go for it. I hear pjs ice cream and watching sad love movies helps too. 🙂 ❤️Posted by HaziiFlo
Remember the day you told me that you wish you could be that emotionally open as I was.. this is the time. Don’t fear what people will think of you because they’re not dealing with your pain and grief. Cry, let it out.. find something that is healing to YOU. If you’re not in the mood to get dressed up, you don’t have too. If you’re a bit moody weepy and depressed, let it happen. Don’t hold it in and don’t think about what to do next, this is the time to use those feelings you have buried inside and reflect on them. You’re not obligated to give anyone an explanation. You have to face your inner demons sometimes to move forward. I know it hurts bad and I’m sorry for your loss, but you are strong and you will get through this. I’m glad you told us how you’re feeling.. the way I view is, you need to self destruct to create something new and beautiful no matter how ugly the process can be.
This I understand. I’m typically theone all dolled up and I’ve been wanting to stay in the house in my pjs but I can’t because I’ve been planning the funeral but when I’m home I come in my room, drink wine, and read dxp just because some stuff on here distracts me... not sure why.
click to expand
Posted by LuckyLibra979@LuckyLibra979 I know what you mean... my sister was 10 years older than me and she was like a second mom to me sometimes. She threw my birthday parties for me growing up, bought my school clothes when it was time to return to school, was the maid of honor in my wedding.... just more than my sister even though sister is close enough.Posted by bluebirdWhat you just described is the exact way I felt when my grandma passed 3 years ago. She raised me so it was like losing my mom. Plus she had alzheimers so towards the end I cried everyday hoping she could remember me. When she died I just sunk in and got hit by so many other things right after so I wanted to self destruct so bad....but I couldnt i just couldn't. And I made a change right then and there. You never forget those who impact you so powerfully. But its an awesome feeling to love someone so deeply and also have it reciprocated. Loss hurts but only because the bond once shared was close.Posted by HaziiFlo
Remember the day you told me that you wish you could be that emotionally open as I was.. this is the time. Don’t fear what people will think of you because they’re not dealing with your pain and grief. Cry, let it out.. find something that is healing to YOU. If you’re not in the mood to get dressed up, you don’t have too. If you’re a bit moody weepy and depressed, let it happen. Don’t hold it in and don’t think about what to do next, this is the time to use those feelings you have buried inside and reflect on them. You’re not obligated to give anyone an explanation. You have to face your inner demons sometimes to move forward. I know it hurts bad and I’m sorry for your loss, but you are strong and you will get through this. I’m glad you told us how you’re feeling.. the way I view is, you need to self destruct to create something new and beautiful no matter how ugly the process can be.
I agree with HaziiFlo. When my Mom died, I wanted to run from the pain but didn't know how. How do you run from something that is inside of you and part of every cell in your body. I read self-help books and basically, all said that the only way out is through it. Let the pain go through you - it will ebb and flow. But notice how when it does come it eventually goes. My Mom's passing was the start of my spiritual life. I vowed to make myself a better person she could be proud of. Maybe you can find a way to channel your grief by doing something to better someone.
My condolences to you.
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Don't think there's a right way to grief but whatever you need to do just go do it. Kinda like how when my friend said "aww someone needs hugs" and I literally threw them across the room while saying "please don't touch me I'll hurt someone".
I think understanding and accepting plays a big part when it comes to someone really close to you. I have a habit of keeping a diary to write about my day and to draw in it helps me make sense of the world and what I'm feeling.
Stay strong and yes it's is okay to burst into tears for no apparent reason.
I think understanding and accepting plays a big part when it comes to someone really close to you. I have a habit of keeping a diary to write about my day and to draw in it helps me make sense of the world and what I'm feeling.
Stay strong and yes it's is okay to burst into tears for no apparent reason.
Hey Wineaux15,
Sorry to hear about this. Dealing with loss is extremely difficult. It gets easier to cope with time, but it will never fully go away, it just gets easier. Just try and stay busy and try and do things that make you feel safe and comfortable.
Sorry to hear about this. Dealing with loss is extremely difficult. It gets easier to cope with time, but it will never fully go away, it just gets easier. Just try and stay busy and try and do things that make you feel safe and comfortable.
I'm very sorry youve lost someone so young in your life. Patience. Take the grief in stride bc there are multiple stages of grief we experience along the way. try to focus more on her life than her death. distraction is your friend definitely in the beginning. do your best to help with her affairs as best you can but know you are human and we all have our limits. when things start to settle, you may try to put together a photo album or something in memory of her. thats the best way to keep her alive is to keep her memory alive in your mind and heart. pm me if you need to talk.
Posted by AbbyNormal
I'm very sorry youve lost someone so young in your life. Patience. Take the grief in stride bc there are multiple stages of grief we experience along the way. try to focus more on her life than her death. distraction is your friend definitely in the beginning. do your best to help with her affairs as best you can but know you are human and we all have our limits. when things start to settle, you may try to put together a photo album or something in memory of her. thats the best way to keep her alive is to keep her memory alive in your mind and heart. pm me if you need to talk.
Thank you so much
Posted by Wineaux15
Hey Fellow Aquas (or actually whoever wants to respond),
Monday my sister passed away. It was all of a sudden. She wasn’t sick.... she was still young (only 43). My mom and I were extremely close to my sister.... extremely... like the 3 musketeers... and now there’s only two of us left to plan and pay for her funeral because she didn’t have life or death insurance and my dad isn’t helping. It’s very stressful for us right now. I find that when I’m busy I’m somewhat ok, but when I’m at home and it’s quiet or my kids are sleep I look at pics of my sister and I get incredibly depressed. How do I grieve? I feel like a piece of me has left with her? Like there’s a hole in my heart. I’ve never felt this heartbroken in my life. The only other time Ive experience pain this close is when my grandmother passed who I also was very close to. But when I asked my husband for a separation and to move out I was hurt but this is another level of pain and it’s foreign so I’m not quite sure how to deal with it. Please help.
Just feel it.
Just feel it.
There is so much love and pain that needs to be expressed and it's okay to feel it now.
This is the only way to heal. My mothers passing felt extremely painful when..
I had headaches as soon as I woke up and it was a nightmare for me.
It's different when it happens to someone close. so close. feels like
a movie you want to wake up from constantly.
Talk to those close to you that have lost too
because they will know how to
respond and feel the most genuine.
They will be the most patient.
I also learned that my mother is closer than she has ever been since
her transition and can do many things so know she, your sister, is here.
every time you feel her, every time you think of her, every time you say
her name, she feels it hang in there okay. take time to feel and do things as best as you can.
So sorry for your loss.
Posted by Capmercury87I thought I would be this way before my mother passed. Even when I know their consciousness
I don't grieve over people dying because I know they are just leaving this plain of existence to exist some where else. Just because they no longer have a human body doesn't mean they don't exist.
Is still in existence, it still hurts because their physical* essence is gone.
my mother still visits me from time to time and see her, hear her but
the feeling of what it is like to see them in solid form. to hug them
on this plane, it's a different experience.
plus a lot of subconscious things being tugged on
Don’t be afraid of the pain and remember that she lives in you.
My brother died 5 years ago and sometimes he visits me in my dreams and they are the best dreams it literally feels like he’s there with me and I wake up and cry when I realise it’s a dream and he’s gone but then for the rest of the day I feel really happy.
Your sister fulfilled her cycle and it’s a beautiful thing, it reminds us to love and love will heal all wounds,
Be with your mum around Christmas and give her the biggest hugs get out the photos light the candles and honour her.
Oh and of course CRY!
Love you xoxo
My brother died 5 years ago and sometimes he visits me in my dreams and they are the best dreams it literally feels like he’s there with me and I wake up and cry when I realise it’s a dream and he’s gone but then for the rest of the day I feel really happy.
Your sister fulfilled her cycle and it’s a beautiful thing, it reminds us to love and love will heal all wounds,
Be with your mum around Christmas and give her the biggest hugs get out the photos light the candles and honour her.
Oh and of course CRY!
Love you xoxo
Posted by Capmercury87I also thought I’d be this way but then think of the Christmas’ that we no longer get to shop and prepare together like we used to... we used to our kids to see the Christmas Lights Show together every year. I think of all the ritual things we no longer will be able to do. Or when I have a bad day and I call her and she’d curse the person out who pissed me off. I think about every Sunday when my mom, my sister, she myself would go to Einstein Bagels after church and shop just to talk and get away from the husband and kids. Most of all I’m thinking about my 12 yr. ok niece and my 8 yr. old nephew my sister is going to leave behind. So I’ve always looked at death as the passing of a spirit and almost a celebration because their at peace but honestly that was when it was people who were close to me but not this close to me.... but now that it is my sister it feels different honestly. I still tried to view it as a celebration, but the pain is still present.
I don't grieve over people dying because I know they are just leaving this plain of existence to exist some where else. Just because they no longer have a human body doesn't mean they don't exist.
Posted by The_eleventh_sign_11
Don’t be afraid of the pain and remember that she lives in you.
My brother died 5 years ago and sometimes he visits me in my dreams and they are the best dreams it literally feels like he’s there with me and I wake up and cry when I realise it’s a dream and he’s gone but then for the rest of the day I feel really happy.
Your sister fulfilled her cycle and it’s a beautiful thing, it reminds us to love and love will heal all wounds,
Be with your mum around Christmas and give her the biggest hugs get out the photos light the candles and honour her.
Oh and of course CRY!
Love you xoxo
Thank you 😘
Posted by nanoI need to do this. I haven’t been eating and I lost 4 pounds since Monday. That’s not the best way to lose weight. Thank you Nano.
Wineaux, I am really sorry to hear about your sister.
There is nothing anyone can say or do to lessen your pain right now, but just know that you do have a support system here, and you are right - it is an entertaining distraction on this site and if that is working for you to make you feel less shattered for small intervals of time - there is no shame in that, keep doing it!
You and your mom also need each other right now. If you can, try to take time off of work for as long as you need if you aren’t already doing so and spend a lot of time with her so you can grieve together - I can’t imagine what she is going through to lose her daughter.
As for the healing process, don’t try to stifle your pain, allow yourself to feel what you feel unapologetically. If you want to cry, scream, be angry, or whatever else you’re feeling, then do it, it is okay. But tip - I have found that if you find yourself feeling despair and hopelessness for very long periods of time with no relief - try to get out of bed, and force yourself to do something for yourself that will make you feel a little joy temporarily like order your favorite meal for takeout if you can eat, or go to a spa and get a massage.
Remember that you need to take care of yourself too.
Sorry for your loss hun. 😢
Grief will be different for everyone, there is no right way or wrong way to deal with it. It will come and go in waves and sometimes it comes when you do least expect it. Just remember it's normal, it's okay and it's personal to you, no one else. Like others have already said, you will feel extremes in emotions, again it's normal.
The thing I have found that works best for myself is to feel those emotions, when I fought against them is when it got worse for me. Also try to talk about it, holding that shit in can be poison. I focus on getting out of myself. Help others, whether it's friends, family or even strangers. I focus on that so i don't get into the bad place, as i call it.
I have a place I go visit, it's where I said my goodbyes at, it helped me immensely when it first happened. It's cathartic and puts my soul at ease. That may or may not be something that would help you, what helps one may not help another. Just remember, she will always be with you.
*hugs*
Grief will be different for everyone, there is no right way or wrong way to deal with it. It will come and go in waves and sometimes it comes when you do least expect it. Just remember it's normal, it's okay and it's personal to you, no one else. Like others have already said, you will feel extremes in emotions, again it's normal.
The thing I have found that works best for myself is to feel those emotions, when I fought against them is when it got worse for me. Also try to talk about it, holding that shit in can be poison. I focus on getting out of myself. Help others, whether it's friends, family or even strangers. I focus on that so i don't get into the bad place, as i call it.
I have a place I go visit, it's where I said my goodbyes at, it helped me immensely when it first happened. It's cathartic and puts my soul at ease. That may or may not be something that would help you, what helps one may not help another. Just remember, she will always be with you.
*hugs*
There is no right or wrong way to grieve.
There's always the initial shock and disbelief in coming to terms with what has happened. Then there's other stages you work through, but everyone does it at their own pace. Some people wallow for a bit, and some try to keep moving through life, coping as they go. Everyone is different and as long as you aren't stuck or being destructive in your grieving process, then whatever. Don't feel bad because you aren't grieving "right" or how others think you should deal.
Right after my mom passed away, I went right into planning mode because all I could think was, "this has to be done to prevent all this ish from happening down the road." It was like I immediately was going into "damage control" while I was still numb to nip it all in the bud right then. I've been through the process before and it was just autopilot. I wanted all of it out of the way so I could grieve after the fact.
It's especially going to be difficult to deal with considering the holidays. My mom passed this time a few years ago, so I get it. The timing is total crap and you're going to be experiencing things a little heavier than you usually would. I think I was just numb a good part of December that year. We didn't even really do much for decorating. Got a small, table top Christmas tree just because we knew our mom would be pissed at us for not doing anything at all haha. My poor brother's birthday is a week before Christmas, so he had even more of a double whammy with her passing two weeks before his birthday.
Allow yourself to be distracted for the time being with all of that and just not thinking about it. It's okay to do so. You'll get through those emotions at some point. This soon after her death, you're going to be on autopilot and not really grasping what happened because the first stages are shock and denial. It's not really sinking in yet.
There's always the initial shock and disbelief in coming to terms with what has happened. Then there's other stages you work through, but everyone does it at their own pace. Some people wallow for a bit, and some try to keep moving through life, coping as they go. Everyone is different and as long as you aren't stuck or being destructive in your grieving process, then whatever. Don't feel bad because you aren't grieving "right" or how others think you should deal.
Right after my mom passed away, I went right into planning mode because all I could think was, "this has to be done to prevent all this ish from happening down the road." It was like I immediately was going into "damage control" while I was still numb to nip it all in the bud right then. I've been through the process before and it was just autopilot. I wanted all of it out of the way so I could grieve after the fact.
It's especially going to be difficult to deal with considering the holidays. My mom passed this time a few years ago, so I get it. The timing is total crap and you're going to be experiencing things a little heavier than you usually would. I think I was just numb a good part of December that year. We didn't even really do much for decorating. Got a small, table top Christmas tree just because we knew our mom would be pissed at us for not doing anything at all haha. My poor brother's birthday is a week before Christmas, so he had even more of a double whammy with her passing two weeks before his birthday.
Allow yourself to be distracted for the time being with all of that and just not thinking about it. It's okay to do so. You'll get through those emotions at some point. This soon after her death, you're going to be on autopilot and not really grasping what happened because the first stages are shock and denial. It's not really sinking in yet.
Posted by Wineaux15It's probably one of the stupidest ways to look at it, tbh. I've heard such ignorant utterings from those who have never dealt with a death so close to them. It's far from comforting and it's insulting that people think that's a legitimate way to console someone.Posted by Capmercury87I also thought I’d be this way but then think of the Christmas’ that we no longer get to shop and prepare together like we used to... we used to our kids to see the Christmas Lights Show together every year. I think of all the ritual things we no longer will be able to do. Or when I have a bad day and I call her and she’d curse the person out who pissed me off. I think about every Sunday when my mom, my sister, she myself would go to Einstein Bagels after church and shop just to talk and get away from the husband and kids. Most of all I’m thinking about my 12 yr. ok niece and my 8 yr. old nephew my sister is going to leave behind. So I’ve always looked at death as the passing of a spirit and almost a celebration because their at peace but honestly that was when it was people who were close to me but not this close to me.... but now that it is my sister it feels different honestly. I still tried to view it as a celebration, but the pain is still present.
I don't grieve over people dying because I know they are just leaving this plain of existence to exist some where else. Just because they no longer have a human body doesn't mean they don't exist.
"They exist in your heart/some other bs!"
or
"At least they aren't suffering anymore!"
Yes, thanks. I'm magically feeling better. Thanks for that empty bs.
It's always amazing what people say and do when you're going through this. The intent isn't malicious, but people really don't think about what it is they're saying sometimes. A simple, "I'm sorry" or a hug does 5893045439 times better than some of that empty garbage.
When you're in the middle of it, that thought process doesn't exist nor does it make any sense. It's actually very deluded and reality evading, tbh.
Posted by Wineaux15DON'T FORGET TO EAT. Omg, out of all the things, this was one of the BEST things someone asked me. I'd come back to work and my manager, who'd been through death of parents, and the first thing he asked- " have you been eating?"Posted by nanoI need to do this. I haven’t been eating and I lost 4 pounds since Monday. That’s not the best way to lose weight. Thank you Nano.
Wineaux, I am really sorry to hear about your sister.
There is nothing anyone can say or do to lessen your pain right now, but just know that you do have a support system here, and you are right - it is an entertaining distraction on this site and if that is working for you to make you feel less shattered for small intervals of time - there is no shame in that, keep doing it!
You and your mom also need each other right now. If you can, try to take time off of work for as long as you need if you aren’t already doing so and spend a lot of time with her so you can grieve together - I can’t imagine what she is going through to lose her daughter.
As for the healing process, don’t try to stifle your pain, allow yourself to feel what you feel unapologetically. If you want to cry, scream, be angry, or whatever else you’re feeling, then do it, it is okay. But tip - I have found that if you find yourself feeling despair and hopelessness for very long periods of time with no relief - try to get out of bed, and force yourself to do something for yourself that will make you feel a little joy temporarily like order your favorite meal for takeout if you can eat, or go to a spa and get a massage.
Remember that you need to take care of yourself too.click to expand
I was semi floored, but got damn he was right in asking. My appetite had been crap and I hadn't given it much thought.
I wish I could give you something that would help, but we're both in the same boat right now. Best advice I can give you right now is let other people distract you. Pain comes in waves and it will help in the longrun.
I’m so sorry for your loss. My brother committed suicide a little while ago. It was the most traumatic thing I’ve ever gone through. Just don’t turn to alcohol, or anxiety meds. I did and regret it. It numbed the pain, but only temporarily. Look up something called Grief Share. They do it through churches. My mother did it and said although the pain is still there it helped tremendously. I’m supposed to start in January. Best of luck!
Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowI’m so sorry to hear that. PM me if guy want to talk. I know for sure it’s the hardest thing I’ve been through.
I wish I could give you something that would help, but we're both in the same boat right now. Best advice I can give you right now is let other people distract you. Pain comes in waves and it will help in the longrun.
Posted by CaramelizedCoffeeShe didn’t know she was a diabetic. Her sugar was high and she went into cardiac arrest and couldn’t breathe. She has just went to the doctor maybe 5 months ago and they didn’t catch it.
First and foremost my condolonces.
Secondly how did she pass away? I ask because my friends who are also in their late 30s/early 40s passed away and it's fuking scary!
Posted by rockyroadicecream
There is no right or wrong way to grieve.
There's always the initial shock and disbelief in coming to terms with what has happened. Then there's other stages you work through, but everyone does it at their own pace. Some people wallow for a bit, and some try to keep moving through life, coping as they go. Everyone is different and as long as you aren't stuck or being destructive in your grieving process, then whatever. Don't feel bad because you aren't grieving "right" or how others think you should deal.
Right after my mom passed away, I went right into planning mode because all I could think was, "this has to be done to prevent all this ish from happening down the road." It was like I immediately was going into "damage control" while I was still numb to nip it all in the bud right then. I've been through the process before and it was just autopilot. I wanted all of it out of the way so I could grieve after the fact.
It's especially going to be difficult to deal with considering the holidays. My mom passed this time a few years ago, so I get it. The timing is total crap and you're going to be experiencing things a little heavier than you usually would. I think I was just numb a good part of December that year. We didn't even really do much for decorating. Got a small, table top Christmas tree just because we knew our mom would be pissed at us for not doing anything at all haha. My poor brother's birthday is a week before Christmas, so he had even more of a double whammy with her passing two weeks before his birthday.
Allow yourself to be distracted for the time being with all of that and just not thinking about it. It's okay to do so. You'll get through those emotions at some point. This soon after her death, you're going to be on autopilot and not really grasping what happened because the first stages are shock and denial. It's not really sinking in yet.
Yes!!!!!! Christmas is typically my favorite time of year! It was my favorite time because my sister and I were in charge of the cooking and events for the family! So it’s really hard for me right now. It will never be the same... it hurts knowing I will always see Christmas differently now.
Posted by Wineaux15I appreciate the offer but I'm also in the same boat as you when it comes to handling feelings, only this time it's backwards. Gotta love that erratic Virgo moon initially taking a backseat to my Pisces sun and now taking back the wheel. I've been crying for the past 3 days and now I'm numb. I also walked away from my boyfriend on the same day I got the news. Funeral was yesterday. I know it would make you feel better too, talking to someone who understands exactly what you're going through, but I'm out of words. I'm sorry, love.Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowI’m so sorry to hear that. PM me if guy want to talk. I know for sure it’s the hardest thing I’ve been through.
I wish I could give you something that would help, but we're both in the same boat right now. Best advice I can give you right now is let other people distract you. Pain comes in waves and it will help in the longrun.click to expand
Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowI sooooooo understand! Cap Moon and Venus ❄️ I need someone to warm the cold heart ❤️.Posted by Wineaux15I appreciate the offer but I'm also in the same boat as you when it comes to handling feelings, only this time it's backwards. Gotta love that erratic Virgo moon initially taking a backseat to my Pisces sun and now taking back the wheel. I've been crying for the past 3 days and now I'm numb. I also walked away from my boyfriend on the same day I got the news. Funeral was yesterday. I know it would make you feel better too, talking to someone who understands exactly what you're going through, but I'm out of words. I'm sorry, love.Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowI’m so sorry to hear that. PM me if guy want to talk. I know for sure it’s the hardest thing I’ve been through.
I wish I could give you something that would help, but we're both in the same boat right now. Best advice I can give you right now is let other people distract you. Pain comes in waves and it will help in the longrun.click to expand
Posted by Wineaux15Music soothes the wildest beasts. Here's a song the Corr siblings wrote for their father who died before their new album came out. The lyrics highlight their struggle with grief to where they're willing to walk through the "dark side" to make contact (with a seance).Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowI sooooooo understand! Cap Moon and Venus ❄️ I need someone to warm the cold heart ❤️.Posted by Wineaux15I appreciate the offer but I'm also in the same boat as you when it comes to handling feelings, only this time it's backwards. Gotta love that erratic Virgo moon initially taking a backseat to my Pisces sun and now taking back the wheel. I've been crying for the past 3 days and now I'm numb. I also walked away from my boyfriend on the same day I got the news. Funeral was yesterday. I know it would make you feel better too, talking to someone who understands exactly what you're going through, but I'm out of words. I'm sorry, love.Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowI’m so sorry to hear that. PM me if guy want to talk. I know for sure it’s the hardest thing I’ve been through.
I wish I could give you something that would help, but we're both in the same boat right now. Best advice I can give you right now is let other people distract you. Pain comes in waves and it will help in the longrun.click to expand
I read the book you read, tasted the words you said
Our story is darkening with time
One fading afternoon
The leaves dried in your cup, no picture understood
But I had a feeling I would cry, you hid it all from me
And I'll miss you forever
Let's hope we've always summer
Yeah bring on the night, I don't care
Turn on the dark, I'm not scared
Spirit money to a flame
Ask that I'll see you again (that I'll see you again)
Yeah bring on the night, I don't care
Turn on the dark, I'm not scared
Wherever it is you left me behind
I'll follow you down the path of my broken heart
Flowers on Edith Grove, wilt like a love note
Every day I'm passing by, I say a little prayer
And I'll miss you forever
Let's hope we've always summer
Yeah bring on the night, I don't care
Turn on the dark, I'm not scared
Spirit money to a flame
Ask that I'll see you again (that I'll see you again)
Yeah bring on the night, I don't care
Turn on the dark, I'm not scared
Wherever it is you left me behind
I'll follow you down the path of my broken heart
And I'll miss you forever
Let's hope we've always summer
Yeah bring on the night, I don't care
Turn on the dark, I'm not scared
Spirit money to a flame
Ask that I'll see you again (that I'll see you again)
Yeah bring on the night, I don't care
Turn on the dark, I'm not scared
Wherever it is you left me behind
I'll follow you down the path of my broken heart
I am sorry for your loss Wineaux15, my condolonces.
I couldn't give you any advice because even though I have been though this myself, I got over those things very fast and Idk why and how.
I couldn't give you any advice because even though I have been though this myself, I got over those things very fast and Idk why and how.
Posted by Wineaux15Seriously. We were told about my mom not recovering on Thanksgiving, and she passed away in the beginning of December. The holidays have been so blah since. We still try to do what we can, but it's not the same still.Posted by rockyroadicecream
There is no right or wrong way to grieve.
There's always the initial shock and disbelief in coming to terms with what has happened. Then there's other stages you work through, but everyone does it at their own pace. Some people wallow for a bit, and some try to keep moving through life, coping as they go. Everyone is different and as long as you aren't stuck or being destructive in your grieving process, then whatever. Don't feel bad because you aren't grieving "right" or how others think you should deal.
Right after my mom passed away, I went right into planning mode because all I could think was, "this has to be done to prevent all this ish from happening down the road." It was like I immediately was going into "damage control" while I was still numb to nip it all in the bud right then. I've been through the process before and it was just autopilot. I wanted all of it out of the way so I could grieve after the fact.
It's especially going to be difficult to deal with considering the holidays. My mom passed this time a few years ago, so I get it. The timing is total crap and you're going to be experiencing things a little heavier than you usually would. I think I was just numb a good part of December that year. We didn't even really do much for decorating. Got a small, table top Christmas tree just because we knew our mom would be pissed at us for not doing anything at all haha. My poor brother's birthday is a week before Christmas, so he had even more of a double whammy with her passing two weeks before his birthday.
Allow yourself to be distracted for the time being with all of that and just not thinking about it. It's okay to do so. You'll get through those emotions at some point. This soon after her death, you're going to be on autopilot and not really grasping what happened because the first stages are shock and denial. It's not really sinking in yet.
Yes!!!!!! Christmas is typically my favorite time of year! It was my favorite time because my sister and I were in charge of the cooking and events for the family! So it’s really hard for me right now. It will never be the same... it hurts knowing I will always see Christmas differently now.click to expand
Posted by CaramelizedCoffeePosted by Wineaux15wow so the doctors saw symptoms but never checked for diabetes? That's really shitty news dude. im sorry-they always assume one has to be OBESE to have diabetes when it actually can be GENETICSPosted by CaramelizedCoffeeShe didn’t know she was a diabetic. Her sugar was high and she went into cardiac arrest and couldn’t breathe. She has just went to the doctor maybe 5 months ago and they didn’t catch it.
First and foremost my condolonces.
Secondly how did she pass away? I ask because my friends who are also in their late 30s/early 40s passed away and it's fuking scary!
im so sorry
we have diabetes in my family. i always tell my siblings to get that and their cholesterol checked and theyr'e not even 30, but people are dying really young these days
click to expand
Yup she wasn’t obese or overweight and my dad has diabetes
Posted by CaramelizedCoffeeI’m glad you fought her on that. It’s truly detrimental.Posted by Wineaux15that's so sad omg. my doctor tried to tell me i didn't have any of the issues i had-i told her bluntly i think this is what is going on with my bodyPosted by CaramelizedCoffeePosted by Wineaux15wow so the doctors saw symptoms but never checked for diabetes? That's really shitty news dude. im sorry-they always assume one has to be OBESE to have diabetes when it actually can be GENETICSPosted by CaramelizedCoffeeShe didn’t know she was a diabetic. Her sugar was high and she went into cardiac arrest and couldn’t breathe. She has just went to the doctor maybe 5 months ago and they didn’t catch it.
First and foremost my condolonces.
Secondly how did she pass away? I ask because my friends who are also in their late 30s/early 40s passed away and it's fuking scary!
im so sorry
we have diabetes in my family. i always tell my siblings to get that and their cholesterol checked and theyr'e not even 30, but people are dying really young these days
Yup she wasn’t obese or overweight and my dad has diabetes
she was like no no you don't fit the mold-tried to argue about my own body with me
i was like BITCH take the TESTS
come to find out i was right she was wrong
click to expand
Posted by Wineaux15I am so sorry for your loss ❤️ The loss of a sibling in my experience is one of the hardest to get thought because you have so many memories and so many things unsaid because you don’t expect them to die.... They only think I can say is that it will get better. Little by little. Just take one day at a time. Soon that terrible cloud will pass and you will be able to smile when you remember her. But it takes time. So you just have to be patient.
Hey Fellow Aquas (or actually whoever wants to respond),
Monday my sister passed away. It was all of a sudden. She wasn’t sick.... she was still young (only 43). My mom and I were extremely close to my sister.... extremely... like the 3 musketeers... and now there’s only two of us left to plan and pay for her funeral because she didn’t have life or death insurance and my dad isn’t helping. It’s very stressful for us right now. I find that when I’m busy I’m somewhat ok, but when I’m at home and it’s quiet or my kids are sleep I look at pics of my sister and I get incredibly depressed. How do I grieve? I feel like a piece of me has left with her? Like there’s a hole in my heart. I’ve never felt this heartbroken in my life. The only other time Ive experience pain this close is when my grandmother passed who I also was very close to. But when I asked my husband for a separation and to move out I was hurt but this is another level of pain and it’s foreign so I’m not quite sure how to deal with it. Please help.
I’m sorry for your loss darling, this is dreadful. Life is honestly so real, sometimes it’s like a dream until something like this hits us and we realise it’s not a joke.
Grieving is a personal thing, some people don’t grieve until years later. I still don’t think I grieved my dads death 6 years ago, I act like he’s gone on holiday and he’ll be back.
The only advice I can give to you is to take every emotion as it comes, when you feel angry then be angry, when you want to be quiet then go somewhere and have time by yourself, when you want to cry then please just cry as much as you like. Grief does not go away, and it can come and go, and be around for as long as you want. You are human. You are YOU. And you are amazing and strong. Sorry for your loss, I wish you and your family much strength at this time❤️
Grieving is a personal thing, some people don’t grieve until years later. I still don’t think I grieved my dads death 6 years ago, I act like he’s gone on holiday and he’ll be back.
The only advice I can give to you is to take every emotion as it comes, when you feel angry then be angry, when you want to be quiet then go somewhere and have time by yourself, when you want to cry then please just cry as much as you like. Grief does not go away, and it can come and go, and be around for as long as you want. You are human. You are YOU. And you are amazing and strong. Sorry for your loss, I wish you and your family much strength at this time❤️
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Monday my sister passed away. It was all of a sudden. She wasn’t sick.... she was still young (only 43). My mom and I were extremely close to my sister.... extremely... like the 3 musketeers... and now there’s only two of us left to plan and pay for her funeral because she didn’t have life or death insurance and my dad isn’t helping. It’s very stressful for us right now. I find that when I’m busy I’m somewhat ok, but when I’m at home and it’s quiet or my kids are sleep I look at pics of my sister and I get incredibly depressed. How do I grieve? I feel like a piece of me has left with her? Like there’s a hole in my heart. I’ve never felt this heartbroken in my life. The only other time Ive experience pain this close is when my grandmother passed who I also was very close to. But when I asked my husband for a separation and to move out I was hurt but this is another level of pain and it’s foreign so I’m not quite sure how to deal with it. Please help.