MadMarchRam
@MadMarchRam
10 Years1,000+ PostsAries
Comments: 0 · Posts: 1528 · Topics: 23
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Should a man pay for dinner? (Page 3)
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Posted by nikkistarI agree with you.Posted by EnochtheWiseThis is the issue I have. I am not saying that paying is the issue. If a man makes the decision to pay, okay, that's fine, but if he chooses to want to go Dutch, that should be fine as well.
societal expectation
Society expectations is what I have an issue with. Why are we allowing our peers to dictate how we act? I don't like this idea that anyone has to live up to societal expectations. Because what one group deems as their normal, is not what another group may deem as normal.click to expand
And related to that, I would love it if in my lifetime it was just as acceptable for a woman to ask a man out as the other way around. I don't follow the "rules", and my mother doesn't either, and it works out well for us. My mother is happily married to a man she initiated with.
Posted by CopperDoveI happily chased down my Cancer. 😄 lolPosted by nikkistarI agree with you.Posted by EnochtheWiseThis is the issue I have. I am not saying that paying is the issue. If a man makes the decision to pay, okay, that's fine, but if he chooses to want to go Dutch, that should be fine as well.
societal expectation
Society expectations is what I have an issue with. Why are we allowing our peers to dictate how we act? I don't like this idea that anyone has to live up to societal expectations. Because what one group deems as their normal, is not what another group may deem as normal.
And related to that, I would love it if in my lifetime it was just as acceptable for a woman to ask a man out as the other way around. I don't follow the "rules", and my mother doesn't either, and it works out well for us. My mother is happily married to a man she initiated with.click to expand
Why is this up for debate? Did they raise the price on salads? 😕
Don't you people know that - women are like herbivores on first dates? For this reason - I also recommend buying flowers.. she might wanna eat those latter instead of desert... ?
Don't you people know that - women are like herbivores on first dates? For this reason - I also recommend buying flowers.. she might wanna eat those latter instead of desert... ?
Posted by nikkistarRight on! 🙂Posted by CopperDoveI happily chased down my Cancer. 😄 lolPosted by nikkistarI agree with you.Posted by EnochtheWiseThis is the issue I have. I am not saying that paying is the issue. If a man makes the decision to pay, okay, that's fine, but if he chooses to want to go Dutch, that should be fine as well.
societal expectation
Society expectations is what I have an issue with. Why are we allowing our peers to dictate how we act? I don't like this idea that anyone has to live up to societal expectations. Because what one group deems as their normal, is not what another group may deem as normal.
And related to that, I would love it if in my lifetime it was just as acceptable for a woman to ask a man out as the other way around. I don't follow the "rules", and my mother doesn't either, and it works out well for us. My mother is happily married to a man she initiated with.click to expand
Posted by EvoxxxscorpioBruh, yes. lolPosted by nikkistarlol he asked to reimburse—?? Now that I'd never do.Posted by EnochtheWiseYou should have seen my face when it happened. It was the first date I went on after my divorce. Literally, the first one I had in 13 years. I swore off dating for a good 1.5 years after that and remained single. I heard from mutual friends, that he bought some flowers for another girl, and they broke up a week later. He asked her to reimburse him for them. *Shivers*Posted by nikkistarI'm the same with my friends. Most of them are struggling financially. I've been fortunate there, really my entire life. Not bragging at all, but I have never even really thought or worried about money and I don't live anywhere near or beyond my means. I'm not very materialistic at all. I have to remind myself to check my bank account just to make sure there are no security issues, etc. But a lot of my friends have really gotten themselves into debt, have outrageous mortgages, so I always pay for meals.Posted by EnochtheWiseI guess I am slightly different than you because I don't necessarily care about making a good impression with someone based on monetary actions. My group of friends, we alternate paying for the entire group. One person happens to not really have funds readily available, and we always pay for her cause of her circumstances. And I don't even care if she offers to pay. That's just us though.Posted by nikkistarI think its pretty common for us Scorps to really not care about societal norms. And truthfully, I don't. I'm more concerned, in the case of a first date especially, that maybe the person I'm eating with does accept those norms, and so I want to accommodate them and also make a good impression I suppose. I am not cheap at all (I usually pay for even friends' meals), and I find it to be a really unattractive quality in anyone, so basically I want to do whatever I can to avoid seeming that way.Posted by EnochtheWiseThis is the issue I have. I am not saying that paying is the issue. If a man makes the decision to pay, okay, that's fine, but if he chooses to want to go Dutch, that should be fine as well.
societal expectation
Society expectations is what I have an issue with. Why are we allowing our peers to dictate how we act? I don't like this idea that anyone has to live up to societal expectations. Because what one group deems as their normal, is not what another group may deem as normal.
I just don't view someone unwilling to pay my portion as cheap. I know cheap. I have been on a date with someone cheap. First date, used a groupon, and asked me if I felt comfortable paying my half of the $ 20.00 groupon at the beginning of the date. Then told me if I ordered a drink, not water, I would have to pay for that as well. I would have offered to pay, and did pay, but the approach was uncouth. Needless to say, it didn't work out, but we remained friends after.
Wow, that date you described....I can't even fathom it really. That's embarrassing to even read....
I don't necessarily understand the need to buy a home. I see a lot of my friends purchase what they call "starter homes, and it makes no sense to me. Why obtain a 30 year loan, if you don't intend to stay there for your life? Baffles me.click to expand
Women going on dates has no intention of paying , orders the most expensive items on the menu and expects the men to pay all the time
A couple have one bank account between them, a joint one. Both earn the same amount per year. They go out on a date & order the same thing from the menu. The man pays the bill with his joint account bank card. Who paid for the date? Man/woman or both 50/50
Posted by Infinite8I would say a friend of a friend. Our mutual friend is the one that set us up. If I caused issues, then that friend would have been in the middle.Posted by nikkistarWhat baffles me is that you chose to remain friends with this guy! ? Whyyyyyyyyyyy?!?!?!Posted by EnochtheWiseYou should have seen my face when it happened. It was the first date I went on after my divorce. Literally, the first one I had in 13 years. I swore off dating for a good 1.5 years after that and remained single. I heard from mutual friends, that he bought some flowers for another girl, and they broke up a week later. He asked her to reimburse him for them. *Shivers*Posted by nikkistarI'm the same with my friends. Most of them are struggling financially. I've been fortunate there, really my entire life. Not bragging at all, but I have never even really thought or worried about money and I don't live anywhere near or beyond my means. I'm not very materialistic at all. I have to remind myself to check my bank account just to make sure there are no security issues, etc. But a lot of my friends have really gotten themselves into debt, have outrageous mortgages, so I always pay for meals.Posted by EnochtheWiseI guess I am slightly different than you because I don't necessarily care about making a good impression with someone based on monetary actions. My group of friends, we alternate paying for the entire group. One person happens to not really have funds readily available, and we always pay for her cause of her circumstances. And I don't even care if she offers to pay. That's just us though.Posted by nikkistarI think its pretty common for us Scorps to really not care about societal norms. And truthfully, I don't. I'm more concerned, in the case of a first date especially, that maybe the person I'm eating with does accept those norms, and so I want to accommodate them and also make a good impression I suppose. I am not cheap at all (I usually pay for even friends' meals), and I find it to be a really unattractive quality in anyone, so basically I want to do whatever I can to avoid seeming that way.Posted by EnochtheWiseThis is the issue I have. I am not saying that paying is the issue. If a man makes the decision to pay, okay, that's fine, but if he chooses to want to go Dutch, that should be fine as well.
societal expectation
Society expectations is what I have an issue with. Why are we allowing our peers to dictate how we act? I don't like this idea that anyone has to live up to societal expectations. Because what one group deems as their normal, is not what another group may deem as normal.
I just don't view someone unwilling to pay my portion as cheap. I know cheap. I have been on a date with someone cheap. First date, used a groupon, and asked me if I felt comfortable paying my half of the $ 20.00 groupon at the beginning of the date. Then told me if I ordered a drink, not water, I would have to pay for that as well. I would have offered to pay, and did pay, but the approach was uncouth. Needless to say, it didn't work out, but we remained friends after.
Wow, that date you described....I can't even fathom it really. That's embarrassing to even read....
I don't necessarily understand the need to buy a home. I see a lot of my friends purchase what they call "starter homes, and it makes no sense to me. Why obtain a 30 year loan, if you don't intend to stay there for your life? Baffles me.
click to expand
Too much drama. lol
Posted by Infinite8LOL yes, and I am stealing that line from youPosted by nikkistarOh I see... tolerate acquainence, then ?Posted by Infinite8I would say a friend of a friend. Our mutual friend is the one that set us up. If I caused issues, then that friend would have been in the middle.Posted by nikkistarWhat baffles me is that you chose to remain friends with this guy! ? Whyyyyyyyyyyy?!?!?!Posted by EnochtheWiseYou should have seen my face when it happened. It was the first date I went on after my divorce. Literally, the first one I had in 13 years. I swore off dating for a good 1.5 years after that and remained single. I heard from mutual friends, that he bought some flowers for another girl, and they broke up a week later. He asked her to reimburse him for them. *Shivers*Posted by nikkistarI'm the same with my friends. Most of them are struggling financially. I've been fortunate there, really my entire life. Not bragging at all, but I have never even really thought or worried about money and I don't live anywhere near or beyond my means. I'm not very materialistic at all. I have to remind myself to check my bank account just to make sure there are no security issues, etc. But a lot of my friends have really gotten themselves into debt, have outrageous mortgages, so I always pay for meals.Posted by EnochtheWiseI guess I am slightly different than you because I don't necessarily care about making a good impression with someone based on monetary actions. My group of friends, we alternate paying for the entire group. One person happens to not really have funds readily available, and we always pay for her cause of her circumstances. And I don't even care if she offers to pay. That's just us though.Posted by nikkistarI think its pretty common for us Scorps to really not care about societal norms. And truthfully, I don't. I'm more concerned, in the case of a first date especially, that maybe the person I'm eating with does accept those norms, and so I want to accommodate them and also make a good impression I suppose. I am not cheap at all (I usually pay for even friends' meals), and I find it to be a really unattractive quality in anyone, so basically I want to do whatever I can to avoid seeming that way.Posted by EnochtheWiseThis is the issue I have. I am not saying that paying is the issue. If a man makes the decision to pay, okay, that's fine, but if he chooses to want to go Dutch, that should be fine as well.
societal expectation
Society expectations is what I have an issue with. Why are we allowing our peers to dictate how we act? I don't like this idea that anyone has to live up to societal expectations. Because what one group deems as their normal, is not what another group may deem as normal.
I just don't view someone unwilling to pay my portion as cheap. I know cheap. I have been on a date with someone cheap. First date, used a groupon, and asked me if I felt comfortable paying my half of the $ 20.00 groupon at the beginning of the date. Then told me if I ordered a drink, not water, I would have to pay for that as well. I would have offered to pay, and did pay, but the approach was uncouth. Needless to say, it didn't work out, but we remained friends after.
Wow, that date you described....I can't even fathom it really. That's embarrassing to even read....
I don't necessarily understand the need to buy a home. I see a lot of my friends purchase what they call "starter homes, and it makes no sense to me. Why obtain a 30 year loan, if you don't intend to stay there for your life? Baffles me.
Too much drama. lol
click to expand
Posted by Infinite8Posted by atearth50/50. Why do you ask? ?
A couple have one bank account between them, a joint one. Both earn the same amount per year. They go out on a date & order the same thing from the menu. The man pays the bill with his joint account bank card. Who paid for the date? Man/woman or both 50/50
The man was just kind enough to stand up and give the restaurant acces to their account.
click to expand
You know what i meant then.
Another one. A woman who rarely pays on dates with men. Has a son. The son grows up earns a living and always pays on dates. Would the mother feel that her son is being taken advantage of?
Posted by Gob_ShiteHow single are you rn? Like on a scale from 1 to cobwebs growing on your dick?
A man who insists on paying for the first date(s), and then constantly gets shafted by female dates he hardly knows, doesn't deserve any sympathy.
Until a reasonable foundation has been established, between both parties, dutch all the way...
I'm always of the mindset that if a guy ask you out to dinner on the first date then he should pay and if was raised up to be a gentleman that's what he should do.
I like the old fashion ways of courtship. I've never had to pay on the first date. But never ever felt entitled to a free meal. Always make sure that I order something cheap, don't drink so water is fine and no desert unless he wants to share one.
But that's not to say that i don't at least make an offer at the end of the night. But if he did accept then I take it as he's not the man I'm looking for and is quickly friend zoned.
I like the old fashion ways of courtship. I've never had to pay on the first date. But never ever felt entitled to a free meal. Always make sure that I order something cheap, don't drink so water is fine and no desert unless he wants to share one.
But that's not to say that i don't at least make an offer at the end of the night. But if he did accept then I take it as he's not the man I'm looking for and is quickly friend zoned.
Posted by ChrisIsKodakReally? Even though she rode the dick last night and sucked it this morning and your getting refueled for round three. Its breakfast so she just see's you as a friend, ovi...Posted by HareBreakfeast and lunch means shes not that into you.
Okay so what if it's breakfast or lunch, and not dinner?click to expand
But if I did enjoy the first date would always put it out there that second date will be my treat ?
Posted by atearthIf you have a joint bank account then paying for dinner is not the soul searching question here. Your splitting your lives/finances already. The question here is whether he should wife her up and buy her bling that's 30% of his salary.
A couple have one bank account between them, a joint one. Both earn the same amount per year. They go out on a date & order the same thing from the menu. The man pays the bill with his joint account bank card. Who paid for the date? Man/woman or both 50/50
I don't know about "should." He does. I do. I haz no expectations. But now that he's spoiled me, my whiskers WILL point forward if he just suddenly stopped.
So, my answer is "yes, because he wants to, he should." ??
So, my answer is "yes, because he wants to, he should." ??
Posted by Pisces1803then why offer? I'm sorry but that's having it both ways...and rigging it 🙂
I'm always of the mindset that if a guy ask you out to dinner on the first date then he should pay and if was raised up to be a gentleman that's what he should do.
I like the old fashion ways of courtship. I've never had to pay on the first date. But never ever felt entitled to a free meal. Always make sure that I order something cheap, don't drink so water is fine and no desert unless he wants to share one.
But that's not to say that i don't at least make an offer at the end of the night. But if he did accept then I take it as he's not the man I'm looking for and is quickly friend zoned.
Posted by Gob_ShiteEh, watch it with the Scorpio talk bruh.
stubborn Scorpio
Posted by Gob_ShitePosted by nikkistarPosted by Gob_ShiteEh, watch it with the Scorpio talk bruh.
stubborn Scorpio
Sod off!
click to expand
Somebody is salty towards Scorpios.
Posted by Gob_ShiteWhy are you bitching and moaning though? Your the keeper of who you allow into your life. If its 'self-centered women' who are users your going to need to be more discrete and up your standards.Posted by Infinite8Posted by Gob_Shiteyou stated "As if men are going to stand around waiting for a woman to ask them out"Posted by Infinite8Posted by Gob_ShiteLol... don't assume all men have the same impatience as yourself. Some men do wait around, actually!Posted by Infinite8
If you ask someone out, you are INVITING them to an experience and you make sure to make it pleasurable. That includes paying.
As if men are going to stand around waiting for a woman to ask them out...
*smh*
There you go again with your myopic Scorpio outlook...
And, once more, your passive-aggressiveness is showing. What has patience got to do with anything in my previous post? You really love putting words in people's mouths, don't you?
You're fully aware of how the world works, even when you set aside the Scorpio mentality of chasing after romantic interests.
Initially dating someone new is a risk for both parties and, IMHO, both should share the risk in all respects.
Fair and a true reflection of equality, many conveniently forget that the 20th century is well and truly behind us.
You can't even fathom men being different from you. It's hilarious and sad at the same time.
You're completely missing the point, but what do you expect from a stubborn Scorpio?
In most cases, men are expected to make the first move and do the asking out. More often than not, the men have no choice in the matter - that's what most of society expects. Therefore, based on your previous comment, because the men did the asking out, they should automatically pay.
It's nothing but a convenient excuse for women, with no moral scruples, to use to justify their self-centred behaviour.
click to expand
Sheet there are men who are players and go after naive women even though they are married/gf-ed up. But eventually those naive women wise up and learn to see the signs of a playboy and dodge those types.
You should do the same with so called 'gold-diggers' who are only after that free meal from you. Thing is, if you are into the person you'll want to show them a good time, which includes paying for said good time.
Again stop moaning and start beefing up your intuition. @gob_shite
You should do the same with so called 'gold-diggers' who are only after that free meal from you. Thing is, if you are into the person you'll want to show them a good time, which includes paying for said good time.
Again stop moaning and start beefing up your intuition. @gob_shite
I do not expect it but it is nice when the person that asked pays, but I still offer, if he says no, then I offer to cover tip or something. I really don't mind paying or offering to grab the bill. I don't think any person should feel as if they "have" to. When I've been involved it was usually split or we would take turns . Our money was our money so it doesnt matter who paid really.
Never gone out on a date with the expectation that it was required he paid.. I'd always make sure I could cover if need be, thou.
Never gone out on a date with the expectation that it was required he paid.. I'd always make sure I could cover if need be, thou.
Posted by -elle-Samesies
I prefer dutch....because if I end up not liking you at the end of the night, I don't have to feel obligated to go out with you again. *shrugs*
I expect the man to pay for the first date.
After the first date, it depends on how much I like him.
If I don't like him that much, then I don't want to "owe" him anything so I will pay for myself. But if it's a man I consider to date seriously, I will let him pay for food most of the time (I will pay if it's his birthday or if we are celebrating something about him, etc.).
I think I like it that way because most men I have met want their wowan to look presentable (especially Leo men 😆). Since I will save some money from not paying for food, I can use the money on myself to look really nice for him instead (e.g. getting my nails done, getting my hair done, dressing nicely, etc.).
After the first date, it depends on how much I like him.
If I don't like him that much, then I don't want to "owe" him anything so I will pay for myself. But if it's a man I consider to date seriously, I will let him pay for food most of the time (I will pay if it's his birthday or if we are celebrating something about him, etc.).
I think I like it that way because most men I have met want their wowan to look presentable (especially Leo men 😆). Since I will save some money from not paying for food, I can use the money on myself to look really nice for him instead (e.g. getting my nails done, getting my hair done, dressing nicely, etc.).
Posted by TheLadyScorpio
In my experience, I have always walked into a date with the mindset that whatever it is that I order, I would be able to pay my share of it.
However, every man that have ever taken me out for dinner, have always insisted that they settle the bill. Even when and after I have always ensured them that I was able to pay my share of it. They were always taken aback by my suggestion, most completely ignored what I had said and proceeded to settle the bill.
In such instances, I have never resisted.
What I do not understand is for one to walk in, as if they are entitled to a free meal. 😐
I come prepare with the above,
but I would expect a guy to pay for me, the old school way..
Posted by Gob_ShiteIt might be sad to you but not to me. Like I mentioned prior I like the old fashioned courtship ritual. If you asked me out on a date then I'd like to be courted and treated as such. I don't just go out on a date with any guy that ask so it's not as if I'm going for the free meals.Posted by Pisces1803
But that's not to say that i don't at least make an offer at the end of the night. But if he did accept then I take it as he's not the man I'm looking for and is quickly friend zoned.
LMAO!
What a very sad world we live in...
click to expand
A guy that pays for dinner in the first date shows me that he wants to make an effort and if you were ladylike enough you'd accept that and let the guy know that you appreciate that.
I think that's the problems these days with women crying out for equality. This isn't about equality at all. I could pay for my meal myself if I wanted to take myself out to dinner.
Mind you I am only talking about the first date. If it was subsequent dates thereafter then I would like to contribute as I appreciate that they have to work to earn their money as well.
I think the problem is that some women feels entitled when it's not an entitlement. If a guys pay on the first date or if he wants to pay on subsequent dates it's an appreciation from me that he's being gentlemanly and I love that aspect in a man. I don't want a man to feel emasculated nor do i want to feel like I'm being placed in a masculine role. I like my femininity.
Perhaps too many women in the 21st century is trying too hard to be equal to men and that comes across as aggressive and unladylike. Some men like that and some don't.
I like my men to be manly men, someone strong, masculine and protective but that's just me.
Depends who asks. If he asks you out on a date he should pay. If you ask him out, you can go dutch or pay for him if you want to.
That's the more or less old fashioned way.
That's the more or less old fashioned way.
Watching the video, the guy is right.
no one is supposed to pay but tbh if a man always say let's go dutch, i feel bad to say this but the reality is that he is a beta lol
when a man pays for dinner, i'd always pay for drinks or something else next time
when a man pays for dinner, i'd always pay for drinks or something else next time
Posted by SleeplessNo.
Buy me van cleef and arpels modern woman
Posted by SleeplessNikkinstigator 2k17Posted by nikkistarStop instigatingPosted by SleeplessNo.
Buy me van cleef and arpels modern womanclick to expand
Posted by TerramineLightvoidOnce again, you turn a topic into something entirely about you and how you're the victim.
It depends.
If I invited you out. If the context is, this is supposed to be some sort of gesture on my part. Of course I'll pay for it. Otherwise it's like taking someone to the store saying "I'll get you a gift but YOU have to pay for it".
What my complaints around DXP have been. Is more centered around the subliminal double standard latent within the fact that nobody is saying "women should have to try to woo and earn men".
Men are told they have to /earn/ a woman. Whereas women are told they are just entitled to it because they can get men willy nilly.
What's funny is women don't care to change this injustice UNTIL they realize that men uphold this system because it means /they/ can just BUY sex. They can objectify and own you. Once you recognize this aspect of it. You rebel against the status quo. But only for this self-absorbed reason alone.
Old meme yo.
He's not my dad, right?
Posted by rektYes, its bad out here sometimes.
it's usually millennial men who are too butthurt about feeling taken advantage of to want to pay for a first date. i don't usually see older men having an issue with it. it's always been that way. man pays to show interest. locks woman down. relationship happens. then they trade off who pays what.
but netflix and chill dudes want free sex and no commitment so why should they have to court a woman and show actual interest?
smdh.
Posted by rektRight!
it's usually millennial men who are too butthurt about feeling taken advantage of to want to pay for a first date. i don't usually see older men having an issue with it. it's always been that way. man pays to show interest. locks woman down. relationship happens. then they trade off who pays what.
but netflix and chill dudes want free sex and no commitment so why should they have to court a woman and show actual interest?
smdh.
Posted by rockyroadicecreamI find difference in cultures fascinating.Posted by AfternoonDelights22You know what I see a lot of?
I'd rather do it but Im not gonna argue about it. If they give me the cliche "you're not paying for mine" I will prolly say yes I am once, but after that then she can just pay for whatever portion she wants.
I used to wait tables and sometimes saw couples get into legit squabbles about who would be paying. Idk who has time for that crap. Arguing in public is the worst. Libra moon would rather die.
Birthday people paying for the entire dinner.
"WE'RE OUT CELEBRATING. IT'S HIS/HER BIRTHDAY LOL!!!"
*watches birthday person pay for themselves or the entire table*
... It makes me sad.click to expand
That is the way things go here. It's seen as "It's my birthday so I am celebrating the day I was born so I will repay the luck I've had with running into you folks in this life."
It's disrespectful to pay for the person whose birthday is, as is to want to pay for yourself. What you can do is bring a gift. But even without the gift, even if you just run into someone and tell them happy birthday they will invite you for a drink.
Posted by AfternoonDelights22That, Libra Moon, is one of the hottest things ever. But up until...6 years ago I would have had the same reaction.
and the guys that even order for the girl lolol wtf even is that
I was coming back towards our table on this first date after I went to the ladies' room...when I saw this mysterious cocktail in front of me. We were at a place that has no menu and you will just ask them to mix whatever drinks you want for cocktails.
So I look at him and go "Uhm what is this?"
"Oh I took the liberty to order for you. You can have whatever you want too but if you'll just taste it? I'm really curious if I got it right...I guessed at what I would like".
The sequence of events in my head:
"how DARE he? that's some nerve!"
"Hmm I gotta respect the nerve though"
"I kinda like his nerve"
"-.-"
"What is this new feeling that I'm experiencing"
"Fuck I feel girly and all vulnerable."
"I kinda enjoy this feeling"
"DAMN I LOVE THIS FEELING"
...and I haven't looked back since.
Doesn't even matter if I would like it or not...the act of it speaks somewhere in my subconscious as a dominant move. A nice dominant move, not some fifty shades of grey kind of shit.
I'd recommend it used only for drinks though cuz food allergies are numerous and tastes are picky and if you don't like it you'd feel bad if you set it aside. But a drink, my sheer curiosity will have me down that.
Posted by TerramineLightvoidThat's fair criticism.
What my complaints around DXP have been. Is more centered around the subliminal double standard latent within the fact that nobody is saying "women should have to try to woo and earn men".
Men are told they have to /earn/ a woman. Whereas women are told they are just entitled to it because they can get men willy nilly.
If the thought of who should pay for the dinner or coffee comes across a man's mind at any point while taking their love interest out, that man should better stay at home and have a meal or a drink on himself. There's no risk then definitely.
Of course the man should pay when taking out a woman for the first time. It has nothing to do with anything, but simple good manners. It's impolite to ask a woman out and expect her to pay. Simple as that.
I'm not even mentioning going Dutch on the first date. Absolutely hilarious. I think I'd die of laughter if any man suggested that to me.
(All this considering he is not broke, in that case a woman should pay cause money shouldn't stand in the way of feelings. After the first date, if they are both sensible and normal, they will offer to pay in turns. After that they'll marry, have children and be too broke to go out, so no problems any more lol)
Of course the man should pay when taking out a woman for the first time. It has nothing to do with anything, but simple good manners. It's impolite to ask a woman out and expect her to pay. Simple as that.
I'm not even mentioning going Dutch on the first date. Absolutely hilarious. I think I'd die of laughter if any man suggested that to me.
(All this considering he is not broke, in that case a woman should pay cause money shouldn't stand in the way of feelings. After the first date, if they are both sensible and normal, they will offer to pay in turns. After that they'll marry, have children and be too broke to go out, so no problems any more lol)
Posted by TerramineLightvoidTell us more about how your a victim of society being a white male, lmao.Posted by rockyroadicecream
Once again, you turn a topic into something entirely about you and how you're the victim.
First off. This is a topic about people's individual perspectives. That means each and every person's response is supposed to be about /them/ and their own thoughts and feelings.
Secondly even if it wasn't. I have no obligation to get involved with something if my involvement doesn't somehow benefit or revolve around myself.
Thirdly this isn't about just myself. But about all men. I'm not saying women aren't victims of the system either. But that doesn't mean that if /they/ are fine with it and want to uphold it, that, that makes everything hunky dory as if the only problem with the system was on the woman's end.
As if women are the only victims. You're a total hypocrite here. Every time I turn around. You're basically saying I can't have a problem with anything. I can't have concerns or problems or whatever. Because I'm man. Because men are NEVER the victims.
Fourthly I really do not consider myself a victim specifically because I'm not weak and vulnerable. I don't have to put up with that which I criticize, and I don't. I'm not a victim because ultimately. I'm not submitting to the abuse.
Nonono I'm not a victim. Because I don't date narcissistic cunts.click to expand
Posted by DamnataMy first thought would be why did he wait for me to leave to order that drink? My second thought, he roofied my drink I'm not drinking that.Posted by AfternoonDelights22That, Libra Moon, is one of the hottest things ever. But up until...6 years ago I would have had the same reaction.
and the guys that even order for the girl lolol wtf even is that
I was coming back towards our table on this first date after I went to the ladies' room...when I saw this mysterious cocktail in front of me. We were at a place that has no menu and you will just ask them to mix whatever drinks you want for cocktails.
So I look at him and go "Uhm what is this?"
"Oh I took the liberty to order for you. You can have whatever you want too but if you'll just taste it? I'm really curious if I got it right...I guessed at what I would like".
The sequence of events in my head:
"how DARE he? that's some nerve!"
"Hmm I gotta respect the nerve though"
"I kinda like his nerve"
"-.-"
"What is this new feeling that I'm experiencing"
"Fuck I feel girly and all vulnerable."
"I kinda enjoy this feeling"
"DAMN I LOVE THIS FEELING"
...and I haven't looked back since.
Doesn't even matter if I would like it or not...the act of it speaks somewhere in my subconscious as a dominant move. A nice dominant move, not some fifty shades of grey kind of shit.
I'd recommend it used only for drinks though cuz food allergies are numerous and tastes are picky and if you don't like it you'd feel bad if you set it aside. But a drink, my sheer curiosity will have me down that.
click to expand
Posted by seraphY'all don't understand the struggles of being a Virgo -.-Posted by DamnataIt's interesting how some things are simply a mundane (albeit still special) fact of life.Posted by AfternoonDelights22That, Libra Moon, is one of the hottest things ever. But up until...6 years ago I would have had the same reaction.
and the guys that even order for the girl lolol wtf even is that
I was coming back towards our table on this first date after I went to the ladies' room...when I saw this mysterious cocktail in front of me. We were at a place that has no menu and you will just ask them to mix whatever drinks you want for cocktails.
So I look at him and go "Uhm what is this?"
"Oh I took the liberty to order for you. You can have whatever you want too but if you'll just taste it? I'm really curious if I got it right...I guessed at what I would like".
The sequence of events in my head:
"how DARE he? that's some nerve!"
"Hmm I gotta respect the nerve though"
"I kinda like his nerve"
"-.-"
"What is this new feeling that I'm experiencing"
"Fuck I feel girly and all vulnerable."
"I kinda enjoy this feeling"
"DAMN I LOVE THIS FEELING"
...and I haven't looked back since.
Doesn't even matter if I would like it or not...the act of it speaks somewhere in my subconscious as a dominant move. A nice dominant move, not some fifty shades of grey kind of shit.
I'd recommend it used only for drinks though cuz food allergies are numerous and tastes are picky and if you don't like it you'd feel bad if you set it aside. But a drink, my sheer curiosity will have me down that.
My father always ordered on my mother's behalf. It's a cultural norm, almost to the point that it isn't worth special attention. When I see this sort of thing being discussed, as if it were an alien dissection, my eyes glaze over. When one just does something as a matter of course – as a natural, harmless reflex, it's odd to witness a discussion about it. It's like being fascinated with your own shoelaces.click to expand
Posted by LadyNeptuneBoth of these is because that move would not really work with a water sun on a first date because paranoia/distrust rules you peeps. She'd have to have known the guy for a while to bypass a legit concern.Posted by DamnataMy first thought would by why did he wait for me to leave to order that drink? My second thought, he roofied my drink I'm not drinking that.Posted by AfternoonDelights22That, Libra Moon, is one of the hottest things ever. But up until...6 years ago I would have had the same reaction.
and the guys that even order for the girl lolol wtf even is that
I was coming back towards our table on this first date after I went to the ladies' room...when I saw this mysterious cocktail in front of me. We were at a place that has no menu and you will just ask them to mix whatever drinks you want for cocktails.
So I look at him and go "Uhm what is this?"
"Oh I took the liberty to order for you. You can have whatever you want too but if you'll just taste it? I'm really curious if I got it right...I guessed at what I would like".
The sequence of events in my head:
"how DARE he? that's some nerve!"
"Hmm I gotta respect the nerve though"
"I kinda like his nerve"
"-.-"
"What is this new feeling that I'm experiencing"
"Fuck I feel girly and all vulnerable."
"I kinda enjoy this feeling"
"DAMN I LOVE THIS FEELING"
...and I haven't looked back since.
Doesn't even matter if I would like it or not...the act of it speaks somewhere in my subconscious as a dominant move. A nice dominant move, not some fifty shades of grey kind of shit.
I'd recommend it used only for drinks though cuz food allergies are numerous and tastes are picky and if you don't like it you'd feel bad if you set it aside. But a drink, my sheer curiosity will have me down that.
click to expand
Posted by DamousPosted by VageenkaIt's really that far out, in your mind? I may be interested and then come to find out over the meal that I had no real reason to be interested in the first place. Now I have to eat that loss? Meh, I'd rather not. But things like this are why I was never fond of dating in the first place.Posted by DamousPosted by VageenkaWhat's overly progressive about splitting?
Yes, he should. Always. And if a girl asks him out and he's genuinely interested in her, then he should still pay.
I can't with this whole overly progressive thinking stuff. "Halfz nd halfz." Bye Felicia. How awkward and embarrassing.
Everything.
I can't imagine a man taking a woman out on a date or a woman he's interested in and them splitting the bill.
That is so awkward, cringe-worthy and not gentleman-like at all.
If they become a couple and a woman wants to treat her man here and there then that's cute. But a man dating and splitting the bill? Gross!
click to expand
'Eating that loss' will help teach you to be more discrete with your selection in the future. You should still be responsible for the bill if you invited the person out. Imo
Posted by DamnataPosted by LadyNeptuneBoth of these is because that move would not really work with a water sun on a first date because paranoia/distrust rules you peeps. She'd have to have known the guy for a while to bypass a legit concern.Posted by DamnataMy first thought would by why did he wait for me to leave to order that drink? My second thought, he roofied my drink I'm not drinking that.Posted by AfternoonDelights22That, Libra Moon, is one of the hottest things ever. But up until...6 years ago I would have had the same reaction.
and the guys that even order for the girl lolol wtf even is that
I was coming back towards our table on this first date after I went to the ladies' room...when I saw this mysterious cocktail in front of me. We were at a place that has no menu and you will just ask them to mix whatever drinks you want for cocktails.
So I look at him and go "Uhm what is this?"
"Oh I took the liberty to order for you. You can have whatever you want too but if you'll just taste it? I'm really curious if I got it right...I guessed at what I would like".
The sequence of events in my head:
"how DARE he? that's some nerve!"
"Hmm I gotta respect the nerve though"
"I kinda like his nerve"
"-.-"
"What is this new feeling that I'm experiencing"
"Fuck I feel girly and all vulnerable."
"I kinda enjoy this feeling"
"DAMN I LOVE THIS FEELING"
...and I haven't looked back since.
Doesn't even matter if I would like it or not...the act of it speaks somewhere in my subconscious as a dominant move. A nice dominant move, not some fifty shades of grey kind of shit.
I'd recommend it used only for drinks though cuz food allergies are numerous and tastes are picky and if you don't like it you'd feel bad if you set it aside. But a drink, my sheer curiosity will have me down that.
click to expand
It's not so much because I'm a water sign but because it's happened to me before. ALWAYS watch the drink go from the bartenders/servers hand to yours.
Posted by LadyNeptuneThis reminds me of my Aries friend that has had numerous mini heart attacks from hearing stories of me getting into cars with strangers. I'm just entirely Sag rising this lifePosted by DamnataPosted by LadyNeptuneBoth of these is because that move would not really work with a water sun on a first date because paranoia/distrust rules you peeps. She'd have to have known the guy for a while to bypass a legit concern.Posted by DamnataMy first thought would by why did he wait for me to leave to order that drink? My second thought, he roofied my drink I'm not drinking that.Posted by AfternoonDelights22That, Libra Moon, is one of the hottest things ever. But up until...6 years ago I would have had the same reaction.
and the guys that even order for the girl lolol wtf even is that
I was coming back towards our table on this first date after I went to the ladies' room...when I saw this mysterious cocktail in front of me. We were at a place that has no menu and you will just ask them to mix whatever drinks you want for cocktails.
So I look at him and go "Uhm what is this?"
"Oh I took the liberty to order for you. You can have whatever you want too but if you'll just taste it? I'm really curious if I got it right...I guessed at what I would like".
The sequence of events in my head:
"how DARE he? that's some nerve!"
"Hmm I gotta respect the nerve though"
"I kinda like his nerve"
"-.-"
"What is this new feeling that I'm experiencing"
"Fuck I feel girly and all vulnerable."
"I kinda enjoy this feeling"
"DAMN I LOVE THIS FEELING"
...and I haven't looked back since.
Doesn't even matter if I would like it or not...the act of it speaks somewhere in my subconscious as a dominant move. A nice dominant move, not some fifty shades of grey kind of shit.
I'd recommend it used only for drinks though cuz food allergies are numerous and tastes are picky and if you don't like it you'd feel bad if you set it aside. But a drink, my sheer curiosity will have me down that.
It's not so much because I'm a water sign but because it's happened to me before. ALWAYS watch the drink go from the bartenders/servers hand to yours.
click to expand
Posted by DamnataI just had a mini heart attack reading this.Posted by LadyNeptuneThis reminds me of my Aries friend that has had numerous mini heart attacks from hearing stories of me getting into cars with strangers. I'm just entirely Sag rising this lifePosted by DamnataPosted by LadyNeptuneBoth of these is because that move would not really work with a water sun on a first date because paranoia/distrust rules you peeps. She'd have to have known the guy for a while to bypass a legit concern.Posted by DamnataMy first thought would by why did he wait for me to leave to order that drink? My second thought, he roofied my drink I'm not drinking that.Posted by AfternoonDelights22That, Libra Moon, is one of the hottest things ever. But up until...6 years ago I would have had the same reaction.
and the guys that even order for the girl lolol wtf even is that
I was coming back towards our table on this first date after I went to the ladies' room...when I saw this mysterious cocktail in front of me. We were at a place that has no menu and you will just ask them to mix whatever drinks you want for cocktails.
So I look at him and go "Uhm what is this?"
"Oh I took the liberty to order for you. You can have whatever you want too but if you'll just taste it? I'm really curious if I got it right...I guessed at what I would like".
The sequence of events in my head:
"how DARE he? that's some nerve!"
"Hmm I gotta respect the nerve though"
"I kinda like his nerve"
"-.-"
"What is this new feeling that I'm experiencing"
"Fuck I feel girly and all vulnerable."
"I kinda enjoy this feeling"
"DAMN I LOVE THIS FEELING"
...and I haven't looked back since.
Doesn't even matter if I would like it or not...the act of it speaks somewhere in my subconscious as a dominant move. A nice dominant move, not some fifty shades of grey kind of shit.
I'd recommend it used only for drinks though cuz food allergies are numerous and tastes are picky and if you don't like it you'd feel bad if you set it aside. But a drink, my sheer curiosity will have me down that.
It's not so much because I'm a water sign but because it's happened to me before. ALWAYS watch the drink go from the bartenders/servers hand to yours.
click to expand
Posted by DamnataI feel like drinks are much different than food.Posted by AfternoonDelights22That, Libra Moon, is one of the hottest things ever. But up until...6 years ago I would have had the same reaction.
and the guys that even order for the girl lolol wtf even is that
I was coming back towards our table on this first date after I went to the ladies' room...when I saw this mysterious cocktail in front of me. We were at a place that has no menu and you will just ask them to mix whatever drinks you want for cocktails.
So I look at him and go "Uhm what is this?"
"Oh I took the liberty to order for you. You can have whatever you want too but if you'll just taste it? I'm really curious if I got it right...I guessed at what I would like".
The sequence of events in my head:
"how DARE he? that's some nerve!"
"Hmm I gotta respect the nerve though"
"I kinda like his nerve"
"-.-"
"What is this new feeling that I'm experiencing"
"Fuck I feel girly and all vulnerable."
"I kinda enjoy this feeling"
"DAMN I LOVE THIS FEELING"
...and I haven't looked back since.
Doesn't even matter if I would like it or not...the act of it speaks somewhere in my subconscious as a dominant move. A nice dominant move, not some fifty shades of grey kind of shit.
I'd recommend it used only for drinks though cuz food allergies are numerous and tastes are picky and if you don't like it you'd feel bad if you set it aside. But a drink, my sheer curiosity will have me down that.
click to expand
If someone ordered food for me I would want to stab them with the butterknife at the table
So I think the same respect should be returned
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