Some say it is, some say it isn't... what's your take on it?
Is CHIVALRY dead?
Chivalry ain't dead I'm living proof
Posted by MIIeFiskI did pull the chair out one time and didn't put it back in and asked my ex to sit ? Payback cause she did it to me before.
But to answer your question, apparently it isnt. Last time I was out with a guy, he was pulling moves outta the book. Opened doors for me (car and building), walked on the traffic side of the sidewalk, pulled out chairs, helped me put on my coat. He was a Libra.
Posted by MIIeFisk—? yep I blame scorp on this one.Posted by Stinger408scorpPosted by MIIeFiskI did pull the chair out one time and didn't put it back in and asked my ex to sit ? Payback cause she did it to me before.
But to answer your question, apparently it isnt. Last time I was out with a guy, he was pulling moves outta the book. Opened doors for me (car and building), walked on the traffic side of the sidewalk, pulled out chairs, helped me put on my coat. He was a Libra.
Because Scorpio.
click to expand
Posted by tizianiThe cap I was seeing did open the door for me I thought that was shweet ? Lol
Opening car doors always seemed awkward to me. No problem in terms of doing it, but actually telling her "don't move" and making her wait an extra 20 seconds to get out the car is awkward. Most of the time it's a pointless custom, depending on dress.
Posted by tizianilol for a female to do it gotta give her props —Posted by Stinger408scorpWell there you have it. Chivalry: Pointless but sweet.Posted by tizianiThe cap I was seeing did open the door for me I thought that was shweet ? Lol
Opening car doors always seemed awkward to me. No problem in terms of doing it, but actually telling her "don't move" and making her wait an extra 20 seconds to get out the car is awkward. Most of the time it's a pointless custom, depending on dress.click to expand
Posted by MIIeFiskI love being handled like a doll ? lol I only do it when she least expect it and it won't be every single time.
It was nice to be treated like a lady. But at the same time I can kinda see how it can also feel like you're being handled like a delicate porcelain doll.
Hahahaha —☝️️She may be right you know ?
DEAD
Posted by MIIeFiskYou got me rollin on that one lolPosted by Stinger408scorpEveryone knows that in every Scorpio male is a delicate woman.Posted by MIIeFiskI love being handled like a doll ? lol I only do it when she least expect it and it won't be every single time.
It was nice to be treated like a lady. But at the same time I can kinda see how it can also feel like you're being handled like a delicate porcelain doll.
click to expand
Posted by MIIeFiskLOLPosted by Stinger408scorpEveryone knows that in every Scorpio male is a delicate woman.Posted by MIIeFiskI love being handled like a doll ? lol I only do it when she least expect it and it won't be every single time.
It was nice to be treated like a lady. But at the same time I can kinda see how it can also feel like you're being handled like a delicate porcelain doll.
click to expand
Like most things chivalry has evolved.
It's still alive and well it's just outgrown its antiquated definition.
It's still alive and well it's just outgrown its antiquated definition.
Maybe it isn't.. But yeah, some of it is awkward, like Tiziani said ..esp opening doors/car doors, pulling our chairs..look too much to me :p it will be embarrassing to just sit in car and wait...or him opening it for me and closing it after me. It's sweet when it suits the situation, like when hands are full, not empty, or some other times.
Posted by SeraphlightChivalry is consideration. It's not limited to a specific gender.
I don't see opening doors etc as chivalry i do that all the time. I see it as normal.
I dunno what chivalry is really ...i guess if i ever see it ..i'll know!
Chilvary turns on this venus in capricorn
Posted by andstillMaybe we don't like what men expect in return for it?
Women won't let men be men anymore
Yeah, it's dead unless a guy want to have sex with you, then he'll do anything.
Posted by tizianiIt's far from pointless. That mindset is exactly why chivalry is dying.Posted by Stinger408scorpWell there you have it. Chivalry: Pointless but sweet.Posted by tizianiThe cap I was seeing did open the door for me I thought that was shweet ? Lol
Opening car doors always seemed awkward to me. No problem in terms of doing it, but actually telling her "don't move" and making her wait an extra 20 seconds to get out the car is awkward. Most of the time it's a pointless custom, depending on dress.click to expand
Most men only do what they think is necessary. Men rarely go above and beyond for their lady.
I've learned that it's the little things that sets us apart.
Posted by DeeLovesRedSo in my childhood I don't ever remember my parents doing all that. It was who ever reached the door opened for the whole family. However manners was a huge thing for our family.
Some say it is, some say it isn't... what's your take on it?
Never seen being sat was mandatory at all even now. Even dates nope I remember one guy opening the door for me or I did too. Lol. Have some one pull my chair at in front of folks nah. What if my clumsy ass falls as I am going to sit down and miss. I'll do it myself if I have to.
Posted by tizianiThis quote better for you? You know, just jk
Opening car doors always seemed awkward to me. No problem in terms of doing it, but actually telling her "don't move" and making her wait an extra 20 seconds to get out the car is awkward. Most of the time it's a pointless custom, depending on dress.
I think it depends on what you consider to be chivalrous OP?
As @tiziani mentioned it's different depending on the generation in which you are dating.
Just only a few decades ago it was common- just if you were to date someone- like first date- that you met the chicks father.Right from the start.
Standards change.
We now how a trillion prounouns, micro-aggression's, sexuality is more fluid than a river.
So- who the hell knows what the definition of chivalrous is now. I think it's dictated by personal bias.
But If i'm going give you just the tip- ha
I'd recommend if you want some dude to pay for your food, and open doors and shit- date a dude over 30.
As @tiziani mentioned it's different depending on the generation in which you are dating.
Just only a few decades ago it was common- just if you were to date someone- like first date- that you met the chicks father.Right from the start.
Standards change.
We now how a trillion prounouns, micro-aggression's, sexuality is more fluid than a river.
So- who the hell knows what the definition of chivalrous is now. I think it's dictated by personal bias.
But If i'm going give you just the tip- ha
I'd recommend if you want some dude to pay for your food, and open doors and shit- date a dude over 30.
Posted by FirstDecanTaurianWomen0428It's different when you're toting around kids.Posted by DeeLovesRedSo in my childhood I don't ever remember my parents doing all that. It was who ever reached the door opened for the whole family. However manners was a huge thing for our family.
Some say it is, some say it isn't... what's your take on it?
Never seen being sat was mandatory at all even now. Even dates nope I remember one guy opening the door for me or I did too. Lol. Have some one pull my chair at in front of folks nah. What if my clumsy ass falls as I am going to sit down and miss. I'll do it myself if I have to.click to expand
I learned manners from my mother. I didn't dare let her hear me not say "ma'am" when addressing a female (any age). Elbows off the table and always please or thank you.
Chivalry I learned from my sisters dad. He would always load is in the car on my mothers side. When she got in, he closed the door (car was already running and A/C was already going. I would see him do more than that when one of us kids wasn't pestering them.
He was a good man. Just had zero spine
Posted by tizianiYou made 2 "jokes" about it being pointless.Posted by SsupermanYou shouldn't joke about something like that, Supes.Posted by tizianiThis quote better for you? You know, just jk
Opening car doors always seemed awkward to me. No problem in terms of doing it, but actually telling her "don't move" and making her wait an extra 20 seconds to get out the car is awkward. Most of the time it's a pointless custom, depending on dress.click to expand
Figured I'd joke with you twice about it.
I've had a looooong night at work. Goodnight Tiz
Courtesy and good manners are timeless
It's just that the place/role of a man and a woman in society have changed and the etiquette from the past is unnecessary. At present the interpretation of opening car doors and stuff by feminists is something of the sort: "These terrible men were patronizing women and implying they're incapacitated". Imo, that's exaggerated. I believe there were men who highly respected women and did these things because, in fact, they wanted to serve them in a way... if a man doesn't respect a woman, he wouldn't want to go out with her in the first place.
It's just that the place/role of a man and a woman in society have changed and the etiquette from the past is unnecessary. At present the interpretation of opening car doors and stuff by feminists is something of the sort: "These terrible men were patronizing women and implying they're incapacitated". Imo, that's exaggerated. I believe there were men who highly respected women and did these things because, in fact, they wanted to serve them in a way... if a man doesn't respect a woman, he wouldn't want to go out with her in the first place.
Posted by LibramissPosted by RumiLI agree. It's different when he is being considerate when your hands are full or something but I would feel awkward if he made me sit and wait for him to open the car door. I have two hands I can open it myself. 😛
Maybe it isn't.. But yeah, some of it is awkward, like Tiziani said ..esp opening doors/car doors, pulling our chairs..look too much to me :p it will be embarrassing to just sit in car and wait...or him opening it for me and closing it after me. It's sweet when it suits the situation, like when hands are full, not empty, or some other times.
Chivalry hmm right now I'm so thankful for my man cleaning the whole house, taking care of dishes, grocery shopping, cooking, doing laundry and taking care of me while I'm sick. 🙂click to expand
----
Your man cleaning the house and taking care of you is not chivalry, is just that he cares about your well being. If he was sick, you would make him clean, cook and everything? Is just loving someone I think
I'm chivalrous to both men and women, the second it's expected from me I stop
Seeing all the responses soem of you are probably going to hit me hard 😛 yay
Chivalry referring to men "helping" women in pointless things as opening a door she can open, I think is outdated; it is just because the reason this was happening was the thought of women as dolls, as vulnerable beings. If she (or he) can't open a door or a can, is obvious that if you help her is not because she is a woman, but because she can't do it in that moment.
If it's referred to PEOPLE being kind and educated, then is a positive thing everyone should be.
Chivalry referring to men "helping" women in pointless things as opening a door she can open, I think is outdated; it is just because the reason this was happening was the thought of women as dolls, as vulnerable beings. If she (or he) can't open a door or a can, is obvious that if you help her is not because she is a woman, but because she can't do it in that moment.
If it's referred to PEOPLE being kind and educated, then is a positive thing everyone should be.
Posted by tizianiAgreed, I see it as part of the whole process as well ?Posted by Fragrance
Courtesy and good manners are timeless
It's just that the place/role of a man and a woman in society have changed and the etiquette from the past is unnecessary. At present the interpretation of opening car doors and stuff by feminists is something of the sort: "These terrible men were patronizing women and implying they're incapacitated". Imo, that's exaggerated. I believe there were men who highly respected women and did these things because, in fact, they wanted to serve them in a way... if a man doesn't respect a woman, he wouldn't want to go out with her in the first place.
I honestly suspect it's more to do with women not wearing long hand-woven gowns on the daily, anymore. Some cultural norms are defined by dress code over everything else, and I suspect this is one of them.
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Not at all.
Posted by andstill
Women won't let men be men anymore
*Let*?
Aren't men capable now of deciding how they behave for thems-elves?
To me it's the normal state of affairs. It's a sad world where people get brownie points for holding doors just because it isn't displayed anymore...aka outdated. Doesn't hurt any of us to just go the extra step with our fellow humans.
It's thriving in my life and it has for as long as I've been alive. It's hard to even visualize it as non existant. I'm lucky/blessed.
It's thriving in my life and it has for as long as I've been alive. It's hard to even visualize it as non existant. I'm lucky/blessed.
Posted by MIIeFiskSo how did you reject him later? ^^
But to answer your question, apparently it isnt. Last time I was out with a guy, he was pulling moves outta the book. Opened doors for me (car and building), walked on the traffic side of the sidewalk, pulled out chairs, helped me put on my coat. He was a Libra.
I am not sure if chivalry ever existed at all like many oldschool men and women want us to believe. Opening doors or offer an older man/woman your place in a bus was something they told us to do when I went to school.
A couple of years ago I was walking with a friend of mine and a woman down the streets. The woman walked on my left while I was walking in the middle. So I softly grabbed her and put her in the middle, I told her nonchalantly that a woman should walk in the middle when she is walking with two men. I guess she was shocked. lol
I also guess back in the 50s a man also didn't have to invest too much in a woman at all, as long as he had a good job. How long did a couple date before they got married? I don't think it was a common thing to date a woman for like 3-5 years before proposing to her.The families handled a couple's commitment almost as a business deal. A man needed a woman to build a family with and a woman needed a man to provide for her. So I am not sure about this whole chivalry died thing. And maybe chivalry is not as much appreciated by women as they want us to believe. 😉
Posted by Fragrance
Courtesy and good manners are timeless
It's just that the place/role of a man and a woman in society have changed and the etiquette from the past is unnecessary. At present the interpretation of opening car doors and stuff by feminists is something of the sort: "These terrible men were patronizing women and implying they're incapacitated". Imo, that's exaggerated. I believe there were men who highly respected women and did these things because, in fact, they wanted to serve them in a way... if a man doesn't respect a woman, he wouldn't want to go out with her in the first place.
Exatamente! 🙂
Exatamente! 🙂
"I believe in chivalry and I think it's up to the woman to accept it or not. I will definitely raise my [future] son to be chilvarous." - My Capricorn
The other day while it was raining, he held an umbrella over my head. He wouldn't let me get out of the car till he was on the other side, waiting for me as he opened my door.
The other day while it was raining, he held an umbrella over my head. He wouldn't let me get out of the car till he was on the other side, waiting for me as he opened my door.
I hope not. Heart swoons when a man is chivalrous. I try to also return to him, two way street like Cheeky mentioned.
Posted by tizianiNot always, depends on the people involved. I have not experienced much of this, so I crave it and hope to see it continue or even increase. I would not find it odd or awkward...okay maybe a little bit at first but it would make my heart pitter patter.Posted by cheekyfaerieIt is weird and it smacks of trying too hard for appearances.Posted by tizianiNever thought about the getting out part. I woulda found that weird. Still woulda said thank you and went along with it!, but I'd have probably looked through his medicine cabinet or under the mattress later.
Opening car doors always seemed awkward to me. No problem in terms of doing it, but actually telling her "don't move" and making her wait an extra 20 seconds to get out the car is awkward. Most of the time it's a pointless custom, depending on dress.
Opening doors or opening car doors to get in, no problem. That happens seamlessly. But there's no part of chivalry that suggests you go out of your way to weird her out or make her feel uncomfortable in your company. That's where it gets counter-productive to the original spirit of it.click to expand
I was born in the wrong era me thinks.
Chivalry requires two willing parties.
Therefore, to ask if it is dead? I would not say so, more so of the fact that there is a constant glitch between the two parties.
The men are either not taught such manners or the women are not willing to accept such niceties as it were, because it makes them seem 'weak and incapable'. When frankly, being well mannered and polite to fellow human beings is merely just that.
People make it a point to place more meaning unto something that was very straight forward in the first place. That is what ruins the simplicity of chivalry, we ruin it for ourselves.
Therefore, to ask if it is dead? I would not say so, more so of the fact that there is a constant glitch between the two parties.
The men are either not taught such manners or the women are not willing to accept such niceties as it were, because it makes them seem 'weak and incapable'. When frankly, being well mannered and polite to fellow human beings is merely just that.
People make it a point to place more meaning unto something that was very straight forward in the first place. That is what ruins the simplicity of chivalry, we ruin it for ourselves.
My hub is very practical with his chivalry.
When it comes to things like holding car doors open, nope lol. Even when we climb into an uber, he divebombs into the back seat first like a fucking billy goat.
but if I'm cold, he always insists on me having his jacket. When walking along sidewalks with speeding traffic right besides it, he insists on walking on the traffic side.
When it comes to things like holding car doors open, nope lol. Even when we climb into an uber, he divebombs into the back seat first like a fucking billy goat.
but if I'm cold, he always insists on me having his jacket. When walking along sidewalks with speeding traffic right besides it, he insists on walking on the traffic side.
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