My Sag and I had a huge argument.

You are on page out of 3 | Reverse Order
Profile picture of Easha23000us
Easha23000us
@Easha23000us
11 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 24 · Posts: 1329 · Topics: 110
Saturday morning, he calls me, and ask me how I was doing, and I proceeded to tell him about my experience driving home in the snow storm the night prior. Mid sentence, he says, I have to cut you off, but did you cash app the 27 dollars to the person that I asked you to? i then told him that I had forgot, but blasted him for cutting me off mid sentence, and his response was, I told you that I have to cut you off. I said to him, that that could have waited until I was done speaking, and instead of him apologizing, he says, it's too early in the morning for this butter. I then said to him that his behavior was rude, and he stated that it wasn't, and I am making a big deal out of nothing. I said to him that he is not going to be rude to me, and if he do not know, I will teach him...You will learn today.. He then starts to curse and tell me that I am making a big deal out of this, to which I hang up on him. He calls me back, and Says, did you hang up on me? And commence to cursing again. He says to me, hang up again. Hang up the f*cking phone again, while becoming aggressive and irate. It got to the point that I could not take how he was speaking to me, and I hung up on him again. He did not call back... I need advise.. Was this my fault?
Profile picture of AbbyNormal
AbbyNormal
@AbbyNormal
12 Years5,000+ PostsTaurus

Comments: 14265 · Posts: 5321 · Topics: 61
Girl, NO! You know it was wrong what he did. There should be no harm putting down boundaries like basic human respect in a relationship!! You can let him continue to disrespect you, which he will. Or you can show him you are a woman of your word and you will not tolerate such treatment. You leave. If he chooses to learn his lesson and come back, hey idk I’ve seen it before. But what’s probably the case, since he cannot even see from your perspective, is that you’ve just got to move on and find someone who makes you feel good about yourself. Someone who hangs on your every word—not interrupts you about some little piddly $ 27!!!! He can go fuck himself!!!! Do better for yourself, girl. ❤️
Profile picture of Undine
Undine
@Undine
12 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 1552 · Posts: 8895 · Topics: 11
Surely you've been interrupted before, and happened to interrupt someone yourself? Many people are fine with it!

For those who are not, you are more suited with a slow speaking partner. Or learn to object without causing unnecessary drama. Or improve your story telling, so you could captivate the audience....

https://news.stanford.edu/2018/05/02/exploring-interruption-conversation/

Profile picture of Easha23000us
Easha23000us
@Easha23000us
11 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 24 · Posts: 1329 · Topics: 110
Posted by Undine

Surely you've been interrupted before, and happened to interrupt someone yourself? Many people are fine with it!

For those who are not, you are more suited with a slow speaking partner. Or learn to object without causing unnecessary drama. Or improve your story telling, so you could captivate the audience....

https://news.stanford.edu/2018/05/02/exploring-interruption-conversation/


He does interrupt a lot... And I spoke to him about it...My concerns mostly is the nonchalance.. He should have asked his question as soon as I answered the phone, and not pretend to want to hear about my night..
Profile picture of Easha23000us
Easha23000us
@Easha23000us
11 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 24 · Posts: 1329 · Topics: 110
Posted by goldenfish

Hmm something in the air these days, because I had almost similar situation.

Related to your situation: all he cared was 27 dollars. Somehow that you did not do that, triggered him. What was that about?


He didn't really seem to care about the money, but how I got mad at him for cutting me off... He then exploded because I hung up on him...He hates that.
Profile picture of goldenfish
goldenfish
@goldenfish
6 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 203 · Topics: 2
Posted by Easha23000us
Posted by goldenfish

Hmm something in the air these days, because I had almost similar situation.

Related to your situation: all he cared was 27 dollars. Somehow that you did not do that, triggered him. What was that about?

He didn't really seem to care about the money, but how I got mad at him for cutting me off... He then exploded because I hung up on him...He hates that.
click to expand



without context: you were sharing how you were driving in dangerous situation. He said he was going to cut you off. Did you overreact? Well, who knows. Are you prone to exaggerate things ? If no, mmm idk. Could be 1 time thing/misunderstanding, could be a shitty a guy in general. It was Saturday, now it is Monday. I always consider mature people can apologize (sorry, I overreacted the other day).
Profile picture of Easha23000us
Easha23000us
@Easha23000us
11 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 24 · Posts: 1329 · Topics: 110
Posted by goldenfish
Posted by Easha23000us
Posted by goldenfish

Hmm something in the air these days, because I had almost similar situation.

Related to your situation: all he cared was 27 dollars. Somehow that you did not do that, triggered him. What was that about?

He didn't really seem to care about the money, but how I got mad at him for cutting me off... He then exploded because I hung up on him...He hates that.

without context: you were sharing how you were driving in dangerous situation. He said he was going to cut you off. Did you overreact? Well, who knows. Are you prone to exaggerate things ? If no, mmm idk. Could be 1 time thing/misunderstanding, could be a shitty a guy in general. It was Saturday, now it is Monday. I always consider mature people can apologize (sorry, I overreacted the other day).
click to expand



It is Monday, and I still have not heard from him...
Profile picture of AbbyNormal
AbbyNormal
@AbbyNormal
12 Years5,000+ PostsTaurus

Comments: 14265 · Posts: 5321 · Topics: 61
Posted by Undine

Surely you've been interrupted before, and happened to interrupt someone yourself? Many people are fine with it!

For those who are not, you are more suited with a slow speaking partner. Or learn to object without causing unnecessary drama. Or improve your story telling, so you could captivate the audience....

https://news.stanford.edu/2018/05/02/exploring-interruption-conversation/


I’m an interrupting cow but I still have the sense to patiently wait until someone has finished their thought, especially if they bring it to my attention in a courteous way.
Profile picture of MyStarsShine
MyStarsShine
@MyStarsShine
9 Years25,000+ Posts

Comments: 37529 · Posts: 41243 · Topics: 331
Posted by AbbyNormal
Posted by Undine

Surely you've been interrupted before, and happened to interrupt someone yourself? Many people are fine with it!

For those who are not, you are more suited with a slow speaking partner. Or learn to object without causing unnecessary drama. Or improve your story telling, so you could captivate the audience....

https://news.stanford.edu/2018/05/02/exploring-interruption-conversation/

I’m an interrupting cow but I still have the sense to patiently wait until someone has finished their thought, especially if they bring it to my attention in a courteous way.
click to expand



Common courtesy
Profile picture of goldenfish
goldenfish
@goldenfish
6 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 203 · Topics: 2
Posted by Easha23000us
Posted by goldenfish
Posted by Easha23000us
Posted by goldenfish

Hmm something in the air these days, because I had almost similar situation.

Related to your situation: all he cared was 27 dollars. Somehow that you did not do that, triggered him. What was that about?

He didn't really seem to care about the money, but how I got mad at him for cutting me off... He then exploded because I hung up on him...He hates that.

without context: you were sharing how you were driving in dangerous situation. He said he was going to cut you off. Did you overreact? Well, who knows. Are you prone to exaggerate things ? If no, mmm idk. Could be 1 time thing/misunderstanding, could be a shitty a guy in general. It was Saturday, now it is Monday. I always consider mature people can apologize (sorry, I overreacted the other day).

It is Monday, and I still have not heard from him...
click to expand



🤨
Profile picture of MyStarsShine
MyStarsShine
@MyStarsShine
9 Years25,000+ Posts

Comments: 37529 · Posts: 41243 · Topics: 331
Posted by StumpGrinder
Posted by Easha23000us
Posted by StumpGrinder

Hell no girl. If he wants your money, he can at least listen to your boring stories AND act interested. Even if that wasn't your money, you were still doing him a favor. No, I wouldn't answer his calls for a while. Let him think about this.

Dang girl...Why my stories got to be boring...LOL!

LOL I was just joking about that part. Men are so fucking rude though. Last phone conversation I had with my boyfriend went like this. I called to update him on a medical situation. He cut me off to tell me that I had five pairs of shoes in front of him and he only had two and he needed more shoes. I was like... okay so anyway what did you want me to pick up on my way ho.. he cut me off playing a fucking harmonica. I hung up.
click to expand



That's why female friends = 👍
Profile picture of AbbyNormal
AbbyNormal
@AbbyNormal
12 Years5,000+ PostsTaurus

Comments: 14265 · Posts: 5321 · Topics: 61
And I’ll say this, I live with someone whose pet peeve is interrupting and for the life of me, I’m still guilty of it sometimes. Our main difference is I will be speaking about the same thing he’s speaking on. He just gets so thrown off of his own thought when I interrupt that he just forgets and shuts down. Doesn’t mean I don’t sometimes still interrupt him, my communication style is more active than passive. But I’ve learned over time to be thoughtful and give him the patience to hear him out completely. Other peoples thoughts are just as important as your own. But it’s the level of respect that’s important to me. As long as both people in the relationship are respectfully expressing themselves, there shouldn’t be an issue. I’m just so confused by the input in the this thread it’s crazy…. Bc I can see from both sides I guess, the interrupter and the interuptee. But it’s not so simple as that. You get what you allow.
Profile picture of Easha23000us
Easha23000us
@Easha23000us
11 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 24 · Posts: 1329 · Topics: 110
Posted by StumpGrinder
Posted by Easha23000us
Posted by StumpGrinder

Hell no girl. If he wants your money, he can at least listen to your boring stories AND act interested. Even if that wasn't your money, you were still doing him a favor. No, I wouldn't answer his calls for a while. Let him think about this.

Dang girl...Why my stories got to be boring...LOL!

LOL I was just joking about that part. Men are so fucking rude though. Last phone conversation I had with my boyfriend went like this. I called to update him on a medical situation. He cut me off to tell me that I had five pairs of shoes in front of him and he only had two and he needed more shoes. I was like... okay so anyway what did you want me to pick up on my way ho.. he cut me off playing a fucking harmonica. I hung up.
click to expand



Eww...These dudes... What is your bae sign and yours?
Profile picture of KimboSlice
Banana Joe
@KimboSlice
5 Years500+ Posts

Comments: 1236 · Posts: 880 · Topics: 7
Posted by Easha23000us
Posted by KimboSlice
Posted by Easha23000us
Posted by KimboSlice

You weren’t exactly giving your save the world speech.

You cant rape another person’s time by forcing them to listen to uninteresting things.

It is what it is...He asked how was my day/night, and I told him...Interesting or not....He asked.

Next time start with the ending

Dude, Get your punk ass off of my thread with your useless ass..
click to expand



There should be a safe word for when Sagittarius starts talking in general lol
Profile picture of PhoenixRising
PhoenixRising
@PhoenixRising
13 Years10,000+ Posts

Comments: 19 · Posts: 19733 · Topics: 48
Posted by Easha23000us

Saturday morning, he calls me, and ask me how I was doing, and I proceeded to tell him about my experience driving home in the snow storm the night prior. Mid sentence, he says, I have to cut you off, but did you cash app the 27 dollars to the person that I asked you to? i then told him that I had forgot, but blasted him for cutting me off mid sentence, and his response was, I told you that I have to cut you off. I said to him, that that could have waited until I was done speaking, and instead of him apologizing, he says, it's too early in the morning for this butter. I then said to him that his behavior was rude, and he stated that it wasn't, and I am making a big deal out of nothing. I said to him that he is not going to be rude to me, and if he do not know, I will teach him...You will learn today.. He then starts to curse and tell me that I am making a big deal out of this, to which I hang up on him. He calls me back, and Says, did you hang up on me? And commence to cursing again. He says to me, hang up again. Hang up the f*cking phone again, while becoming aggressive and irate. It got to the point that I could not take how he was speaking to me, and I hung up on him again. He did not call back... I need advise.. Was this my fault?

Fault? I think if you're looking to move forward you can't really be stuck on that. Basically, he seemed more concerned about what you did/didn't do for him (e.g. $ 27 cash app) than how you were doing (the question he actually asked). From there, gasoline was thrown into a pile of fire, pun intended. You should have simply told the man that you didn't appreciate him pretending to care about your day, when he really called about the $ 27, told him you didn't send the funds and simply continue your story instead of "blasting him" for cutting you off since the former (why he really called) is what seems to be the real trigger here. If you're jumping from 1 to 10 over being cut off, how exactly can you cuss him out for jumping from 1 to 10 for being called rude?

Yeah, his interruption may have been irritating, especially if it's a habit, however I am sure you both do that to each other. If cutting you off is a habit of his, then you simply tell him it's a something you don't like, please work on it. "Blasting him" for that oppose to simply informing him you don't like it when he does it made this a much bigger deal than it needed to be. The swearing on his end was unnecessary I agree, and I am sure some would say "blasting him" was just as unnecessary. So again fault? Both. You both contributed to this situation and lost your tempers unnecessarily.

Lol, like why did you even pick up the phone after hanging up on him? If you were done with the conversation , be done with it and give yourself space to simmer down.
Profile picture of Easha23000us
Easha23000us
@Easha23000us
11 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 24 · Posts: 1329 · Topics: 110
Posted by MyStarsShine
Posted by Easha23000us
Posted by MyStarsShine
Posted by Maxian

Why bother asking about your day if he's not willing to listen.

Those 27 dollars can wait, it's not the end of the world. If it's so pressing he can transfer it himself!

This

He’s a dead giveway

Selfish 🥴

Maybe even a bit narcissistic..

Yes indeed

Why is he inside?He was convicted of murder at the age of 18. But maintains his innocence.
click to expand


Profile picture of MyStarsShine
MyStarsShine
@MyStarsShine
9 Years25,000+ Posts

Comments: 37529 · Posts: 41243 · Topics: 331
Posted by Easha23000us
Posted by MyStarsShine
Posted by Easha23000us
Posted by MyStarsShine
Posted by Maxian

Why bother asking about your day if he's not willing to listen.

Those 27 dollars can wait, it's not the end of the world. If it's so pressing he can transfer it himself!

This

He’s a dead giveway

Selfish 🥴

Maybe even a bit narcissistic..

Yes indeed

Why is he inside?He was convicted of murder at the age of 18. But maintains his innocence.

click to expand



😬
Profile picture of Undine
Undine
@Undine
12 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 1552 · Posts: 8895 · Topics: 11
Posted by Parkourler
Posted by KimboSlice

You weren’t exactly giving your save the world speech.

You cant rape another person’s time by forcing them to listen to uninteresting things.

That's not how it works, interupting is rude period ! If I had a meeting decided i wont like it i cant just rurn around and go home
click to expand



Yes you can, unless you are on their payroll.
Profile picture of Undine
Undine
@Undine
12 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 1552 · Posts: 8895 · Topics: 11
Posted by AbbyNormal
Posted by Undine

Surely you've been interrupted before, and happened to interrupt someone yourself? Many people are fine with it!

For those who are not, you are more suited with a slow speaking partner. Or learn to object without causing unnecessary drama. Or improve your story telling, so you could captivate the audience....

https://news.stanford.edu/2018/05/02/exploring-interruption-conversation/

I’m an interrupting cow but I still have the sense to patiently wait until someone has finished their thought, especially if they bring it to my attention in a courteous way.
click to expand



Your statement has at least two contradictions, though...

interrupting versus patient

have the sense to versus they (have to) bring to my attention

And you know what...you are still lovely!
Profile picture of Parkourler
Parkourler
@Parkourler
9 Years1,000+ PostsTaurus

Comments: 512 · Posts: 2343 · Topics: 199
Posted by Undine
Posted by Parkourler
Posted by KimboSlice

You weren’t exactly giving your save the world speech.

You cant rape another person’s time by forcing them to listen to uninteresting things.

That's not how it works, interupting is rude period ! If I had a meeting decided i wont like it i cant just rurn around and go home

Yes you can, unless you are on their payroll.
click to expand



Yeah that is a valid exception. That's why I want to be a business owner
Profile picture of Sleepyquantro1
Sleepyquantro1
@Sleepyquantro1
4 Years500+ Posts

Comments: 248 · Posts: 563 · Topics: 9
Posted by Wizardz_

He obv called you to find out if you had done that and wasn't really interested in your story lol

Sounds like a big mutual escalation and prob nothing to do with the actual conversation but something deeper going on, some unresolved conflict you have going on between you?


Agree with the 1st 2 lines

I had a sag friend like this! He’d call and act like he wanted to talk to me, but at the end of every convo, he’d be asking for something, to borrow money mostly. 😕

He also would do the cut of thing, mid sentence 😂

Now after the 1st couple times, I knew that his fake concern was just a smoke 💨 screen to conceal his ulterior motive. I purposely let it happen several times, just to observe. Once I had no doubt, I told him off, and them cut him off.

The thing is, the biggest insult was the insult to my intelligence. The fact that he thought 💭 by making small talk, pretending to care, that I’d be clueless to what he was doing.

I’m all for being there for friends, I like my friends to know they can count on me when the need arises, but you won’t use me.

A friend won’t call ONLY when they need something.
Profile picture of Sleepyquantro1
Sleepyquantro1
@Sleepyquantro1
4 Years500+ Posts

Comments: 248 · Posts: 563 · Topics: 9
Posted by DMV

Jail is a transactional place.

Quid pro quo

It is a what have you done for me lately kind of place

People in jail don’t make friends, they make transactional associates who can provide something.

Make sure you’re not a transactional associate


Not saying this is what’s going on bc I don’t know them 🤷🏽‍♀️, but guys is jail are usually looking for a woman that they can use/ put money on their books. 😐

Guys that I know, that have been locked up before, admit to this all the time.
Profile picture of Easha23000us
Easha23000us
@Easha23000us
11 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 24 · Posts: 1329 · Topics: 110
Posted by PhoenixRising
Posted by Easha23000us

Saturday morning, he calls me, and ask me how I was doing, and I proceeded to tell him about my experience driving home in the snow storm the night prior. Mid sentence, he says, I have to cut you off, but did you cash app the 27 dollars to the person that I asked you to? i then told him that I had forgot, but blasted him for cutting me off mid sentence, and his response was, I told you that I have to cut you off. I said to him, that that could have waited until I was done speaking, and instead of him apologizing, he says, it's too early in the morning for this butter. I then said to him that his behavior was rude, and he stated that it wasn't, and I am making a big deal out of nothing. I said to him that he is not going to be rude to me, and if he do not know, I will teach him...You will learn today.. He then starts to curse and tell me that I am making a big deal out of this, to which I hang up on him. He calls me back, and Says, did you hang up on me? And commence to cursing again. He says to me, hang up again. Hang up the f*cking phone again, while becoming aggressive and irate. It got to the point that I could not take how he was speaking to me, and I hung up on him again. He did not call back... I need advise.. Was this my fault?

Fault? I think if you're looking to move forward you can't really be stuck on that. Basically, he seemed more concerned about what you did/didn't do for him (e.g. $ 27 cash app) than how you were doing (the question he actually asked). From there, gasoline was thrown into a pile of fire, pun intended. You should have simply told the man that you didn't appreciate him pretending to care about your day, when he really called about the $ 27, told him you didn't send the funds and simply continue your story instead of "blasting him" for cutting you off since the former (why he really called) is what seems to be the real trigger here. If you're jumping from 1 to 10 over being cut off, how exactly can you cuss him out for jumping from 1 to 10 for being called rude?

Yeah, his interruption may have been irritating, especially if it's a habit, however I am sure you both do that to each other. If cutting you off is a habit of his, then you simply tell him it's a something you don't like, please work on it. "Blasting him" for that oppose to simply informing him you don't like it when he does it made this a much bigger deal than it needed to be. The swearing on his end was unnecessary I agree, and I am sure some would say "blasting him" was just as unnecessary. So again fault? Both. You both contributed to this situation and lost your tempers unnecessarily.

Lol, like why did you even pick up the phone after hanging up on him? If you were done with the conversation , be done with it and give yourself space to simmer down.
click to expand



This is true..I picked up the second time, hoping that he would see the error in his ways, and apologize.
Profile picture of Easha23000us
Easha23000us
@Easha23000us
11 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 24 · Posts: 1329 · Topics: 110
Posted by Krabss
Posted by Easha23000us
Posted by Maxian

Why bother asking about your day if he's not willing to listen.

Those 27 dollars can wait, it's not the end of the world. If it's so pressing he can transfer it himself!

He is in prison...

You should have started the story with this...
click to expand



For what reason? People who reds my post know that he is incarcerated... What is the purpose of me stating it again?
Profile picture of Easha23000us
Easha23000us
@Easha23000us
11 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 24 · Posts: 1329 · Topics: 110
Posted by MyStarsShine
Posted by Maxian
Posted by MyStarsShine
Posted by Maxian

Why bother asking about your day if he's not willing to listen.

Those 27 dollars can wait, it's not the end of the world. If it's so pressing he can transfer it himself!

This

He’s a dead giveway

Selfish 🥴

There's more going on than just selfish 😅

🥴
click to expand





Let's hear your opinion......
Profile picture of Easha23000us
Easha23000us
@Easha23000us
11 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 24 · Posts: 1329 · Topics: 110
Posted by Wizardz_
Posted by Easha23000us
Posted by Maxian

Why bother asking about your day if he's not willing to listen.

Those 27 dollars can wait, it's not the end of the world. If it's so pressing he can transfer it himself!

He is in prison...

That's quite important information

How do prison phones work? He might have had limited time and needed to rush things or be stressed out

What is the 27 dollars for? It might be much more of a big deal when he is in prison. Maybe he feels helpless and he hates asking you to do it for him - that could definitely be under the surface and cause impatience. I suspect it is something to do with that. It sucks to be dependent on someone, hoping they will do something you ask them and they don't realise it is stressing you and you are reliant on them because you can't do it yourself. I think that made him angry, it's covering up his feelings of helplessness being stuck in prison and unable to do this simple thing himself. He just wanted to know you had done it asap so he could not have to feel that way anymore, knowing it was done and meanwhile you were unknowingly talking about your day not realising his impatience and stress bubbling away underneath
click to expand



He and I speak daily...So if that was the case, he should have started the conversation off with that.
Profile picture of Easha23000us
Easha23000us
@Easha23000us
11 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 24 · Posts: 1329 · Topics: 110
Posted by GammaArietis
Posted by Krabss
Posted by Easha23000us
Posted by Maxian

Why bother asking about your day if he's not willing to listen.

Those 27 dollars can wait, it's not the end of the world. If it's so pressing he can transfer it himself!

He is in prison...

You should have started the story with this...

Honestly this. It provides all the context. He’s relying on you for currency and whether or not I agree with the situation, you forgot he needs money and he doesn’t care about your day lol. You’re equally self absorbed lol.
click to expand



I guess.....
First
Previous
Next
Last